Act I, Scene II — [3644]
ANTONIO, DELIO. [Enter] SILVIO, CASTRUCCIO, JULIA, RODERIGO, and GRISOLAN.
Delio. The presence ’gins to fill: you promis’d me To make me the partaker of the natures Of some of your great courtiers.
Ant. The lord cardinal’s And other strangers’ that are now in court? I shall.—Here comes the great Calabrian duke.
[Enter FERDINAND and Attendants.]
Ferd. Who took the ring oft’nest?[3645] 6
Sil. Antonio Bologna, my lord.
Ferd. Our sister duchess’ great master of her household? Give him the jewel.—When shall we leave this sportive action, and fall to action indeed? 11
Cast. Methinks, my lord, you should not desire to go to war in person.
Ferd. Now for some gravity.—Why, my lord? 15
Cast. It is fitting a soldier arise to be a prince, but not necessary a prince descend to be a captain.
Ferd. No?
Cast. No, my lord; he were far better do it by a deputy. 21
Ferd. Why should he not as well sleep or eat by a deputy? This might take idle, offensive, and base office from him, whereas the other deprives him of honour. 25
Cast. Believe my experience, that realm is never long in quiet where the ruler is a soldier.
Ferd. Thou told’st me thy wife could not endure fighting.
Cast. True, my lord. 30
Ferd. And of a jest she broke of[3646] a captain she met full of wounds: I have forgot it.
Cast. She told him, my lord, he was a pitiful fellow, to lie, like the children of Ismael, all in tents.[3647] 35
Ferd. Why, there ’s a wit were able to undo all the chirurgeons[3648] o’ the city; for although gallants should quarrel, and had drawn their weapons, and were ready to go to it, yet her persuasions would make them put up. 40
Cast. That she would, my lord.—How do you like my Spanish gennet?[3649]
Rod. He is all fire.
Ferd. I am of Pliny’s opinion, I think he was begot by the wind; he runs as if he were ballas’d[3650] with quicksilver. 46
Sil. True, my lord, he reels from the tilt often.
Rod. Gris. Ha, ha, ha!
Ferd. Why do you laugh? Methinks you that are courtiers should be my touch-wood, (51) take fire when I give fire; that is, laugh when I laugh, were the subject never so witty.
Cast. True, my lord: I myself have heard a very good jest, and have scorn’d to seem to have so silly a wit as to understand it. 56
Ferd. But I can laugh at your fool, my lord.
Cast. He cannot speak, you know, but he makes faces; my lady cannot abide him.
Ferd. No? 60
Cast. Nor endure to be in merry company; for she says too full laughing, and too much company, fills her too much of the wrinkle.
Ferd. I would, then, have a mathematical instrument made for her face, that she might not laugh out of compass.—I shall shortly visit (66) you at Milan, Lord Silvio.
Sil. Your grace shall arrive most welcome.
Ferd. You are a good horseman, Antonio: you have excellent riders in France; what do you think of good horsemanship? 71
Ant. Nobly, my lord: as out of the Grecian horse issued many famous princes, so out of brave horsemanship arise the first sparks of growing resolution, that raise the mind to noble action. 76
Ferd. You have bespoke it worthily.
Sil. Your brother, the lord cardinal, and sister duchess.
[Enter CARDINAL, with DUCHESS, and CARIOLA.]
Card. Are the galleys come about?
Gris. They are, my lord. 80
Ferd. Here ’s the Lord Silvio is come to take his leave.
Delio. Now, sir, your promise: what ’s that cardinal? I mean his temper. They say he ’s a brave fellow, Will play his five thousand crowns at tennis, dance, Court ladies, and one that hath fought single combats. 85
Ant. Some such flashes superficially hang on him for form; but observe his inward character: he is a melancholy churchman. The spring in his face is nothing but the engend’ring of toads; where he is jealous of any man, he lays worse plots for them than ever was impos’d (91) on Hercules, for he strews in his way flatterers, panders, intelligencers, atheists, and a thousand such political monsters. He should have been Pope; but instead of coming to it by the primitive decency of the church, he did (96) bestow bribes so largely and so impudently as if he would have carried it away without heaven’s knowledge. Some good he hath done——
Delio. You have given too much of him. What ’s his brother? 100
Ant. The duke there? A most perverse and turbulent nature. What appears in him mirth is merely outside; If he laught heartily, it is to laugh All honesty out of fashion.
Delio. Twins?
Ant. In quality. He speaks with others’ tongues, and hears men’s suits 105 With others’ ears; will seem to sleep o’ th’ bench Only to entrap offenders in their answers; Dooms men to death by information; Rewards by hearsay.
Delio. Then the law to him Is like a foul, black cobweb to a spider,— 110 He makes it his dwelling and a prison To entangle those shall feed him.
Ant. Most true: He never pays debts unless they be shrewd turns, And those he will confess that he doth owe. Last, for his brother there, the cardinal, 115 They that do flatter him most say oracles Hang at his lips; and verily I believe them, For the devil speaks in them. But for their sister, the right noble duchess, You never fix’d your eye on three fair medals Cast in one figure, of so different temper. 121 For her discourse, it is so full of rapture, You only will begin then to be sorry When she doth end her speech, and wish, in wonder, She held it less vain-glory to talk much, 125 Than your penance to hear her. Whilst she speaks, She throws upon a man so sweet a look That it were able to raise one to a galliard[3651] That lay in a dead palsy, and to dote On that sweet countenance; but in that look 130 There speaketh so divine a continence As cuts off all lascivious and vain hope. Her days are practis’d in such noble virtue, That sure her nights, nay, more, her very sleeps, Are more in heaven than other ladies’ shrifts. Let all sweet ladies break their flatt’ring glasses, 136 And dress themselves in her.
Delio. Fie, Antonio. You play the wire-drawer with her commendations.
Ant. I ’ll case the picture up: only thus much; All her particular worth grows to this sum,— She stains[3652] the time past, lights the time to come. 141
Cari. You must attend my lady in the gallery, Some half an hour hence.
Ant. I shall. [Exeunt ANTONIO and DELIO.]
Ferd. Sister, I have a suit to you.
Duch. To me, sir?
Ferd. A gentlemen here, Daniel de Bosola, One that was in the galleys——
Duch. Yes, I know him. 146
Ferd. A worthy fellow he ’s: pray, let me entreat for The provisorship of your horse.
Duch. Your knowledge of him Commends him and prefers him.
Ferd. Call him hither. [Exit Attendants.] We [are] now upon[3653] parting. Good Lord Silvio, Do us commend to all our noble friends 151 At the leaguer.
Sil. Sir, I shall.
[Duch.] You are for Milan?
Sil. I am.
Duch. Bring the caroches.[3654]—We ’ll bring you down To the haven. [Exeunt DUCHESS, SILVIO, CASTRUCCIO, RODERIGO, GRISOLAN, CARIOLA, JULIA, and Attendants.]
Card. Be sure you entertain that Bosola 154 For your intelligence.[3655] I would not be seen in ’t; And therefore many times I have slighted him When he did court our furtherance, as this morning.
Ferd. Antonio, the great master of her household, Had been far fitter.
Card. You are deceiv’d in him. 159 His nature is too honest for such business.— He comes: I ’ll leave you. [Exit.]
[Re-enter BOSOLA.]
Bos. I was lur’d to you.
Ferd. My brother, here, the cardinal could never Abide you.
Bos. Never since he was in my debt.
Ferd. May be some oblique character in your face Made him suspect you.
Bos. Doth he study physiognomy? 165 There ’s no more credit to be given to th’ face Than to a sick man’s urine, which some call The physician’s whore, because she cozens[3656] him. He did suspect me wrongfully.
Ferd. For that You must give great men leave to take their times. 170 Distrust doth cause us seldom be deceiv’d. You see the oft shaking of the cedar-tree Fastens it more at root.
Bos. Yet take heed; For to suspect a friend unworthily Instructs him the next way to suspect you, 175 And prompts him to deceive you.
Ferd. There ’s gold.
Bos. So: What follows?—[Aside.] Never rain’d such showers as these Without thunderbolts i’ th’ tail of them.—Whose throat must I cut?
Ferd. Your inclination to shed blood rides post Before my occasion to use you. I give you that To live i’ th’ court here, and observe the duchess; 181 To note all the particulars of her behaviour, What suitors do solicit her for marriage, And whom she best affects.[3657] She ’s a young widow: I would not have her marry again.
Bos. No, sir? 185
Ferd. Do not you ask the reason; but be satisfied. I say I would not.
Bos. It seems you would create me One of your familiars.
Ferd. Familiar! What ’s that?
Bos. Why, a very quaint invisible devil in flesh,— An intelligencer.[3658]
Ferd. Such a kind of thriving thing 190 I would wish thee; and ere long thou mayst arrive At a higher place by ’t.
Bos. Take your devils, Which hell calls angels! These curs’d gifts would make You a corrupter, me an impudent traitor; And should I take these, they ’d take me [to] hell. 195
Ferd. Sir, I ’ll take nothing from you that I have given. There is a place that I procur’d for you This morning, the provisorship o’ th’ horse; Have you heard on ’t?
Bos. No.
Ferd. ’T is yours: is ’t not worth thanks?
Bos. I would have you curse yourself now, that your bounty 200 (Which makes men truly noble) e’er should make me A villain. O, that to avoid ingratitude For the good deed you have done me, I must do All the ill man can invent! Thus the devil Candies all sins o’er: and what heaven terms vile, 205 That names he complimental.
Ferd. Be yourself; Keep your old garb of melancholy; ’t will express You envy those that stand above your reach, Yet strive not to come near ’em. This will gain Access to private lodgings, where yourself 210 May, like a politic dormouse——
Bos. As I have seen some Feed in a lord’s dish, half asleep, not seeming To listen to any talk; and yet these rogues Have cut his throat in a dream. What ’s my place? The provisorship o’ th’ horse? Say, then, my corruption 215 Grew out of horse-dung: I am your creature.
Ferd. Away! [Exit.]
Bos. Let good men, for good deeds, covet good fame, Since place and riches oft are bribes of shame. Sometimes the devil doth preach. Exit.
[SCENE III.][3659]
[Enter FERDINAND, DUCHESS, CARDINAL, and CARIOLA.]
Card. We are to part from you; and your own discretion Must now be your director.
Ferd. You are a widow: You know already what man is; and therefore Let not youth, high promotion, eloquence——
Card. No, 5 Nor anything without the addition, honour, Sway your high blood.
Ferd. Marry! They are most luxurious[3660] Will wed twice.
Card. O, fie!
Ferd. Their livers are more spotted Than Laban’s sheep.[3661]
Duch. Diamonds are of most value, They say, that have past through most jewellers’ hands. 10
Ferd. Whores by that rule are precious.
Duch. Will you hear me? I ’ll never marry.
Card. So most widows say; But commonly that motion[3662] lasts no longer Than the turning of an hour-glass: the funeral sermon And it end both together.
Ferd. Now hear me: 15 You live in a rank pasture, here, i’ th’ court; There is a kind of honey-dew that ’s deadly; ’T will poison your fame; look to ’t. Be not cunning; For they whose faces do belie their hearts Are witches ere they arrive at twenty years, 20 Ay, and give the devil suck.
Duch. This is terrible good counsel.
Ferd. Hypocrisy is woven of a fine small thread, Subtler than Vulcan’s engine:[3663] yet, believe ’t, Your darkest actions, nay, your privat’st thoughts, 25 Will come to light.
Card. You may flatter yourself, And take your own choice; privately be married Under the eaves of night——
Ferd. Think ’t the best voyage That e’er you made; like the irregular crab, Which, though ’t goes backward, thinks that it goes right 30 Because it goes its own way: but observe, Such weddings may more properly be said To be executed than celebrated.
Card. The marriage night Is the entrance into some prison.
Ferd. And those joys, Those lustful pleasures, are like heavy sleeps 35 Which do fore-run man’s mischief.
Card. Fare you well. Wisdom begins at the end: remember it. [Exit.]
Duch. I think this speech between you both was studied, It came so roundly off.
Ferd. You are my sister: This was my father’s poniard, do you see? 40 I’d be loth to see ’t look rusty, ’cause ’t was his. I would have you give o’er these chargeable revels: A visor and a mask are whispering-rooms That were nev’r built for goodness,—fare ye well— And women like that part which, like the lamprey, 45 Hath nev’r a bone in ’t.
Duch. Fie, sir!
Ferd. Nay, I mean the tongue; variety of courtship. What cannot a neat knave with a smooth tale Make a woman believe? Farewell, lusty widow. [Exit.]
Duch. Shall this move me? If all my royal kindred 50 Lay in my way unto this marriage, I ’d make them my low footsteps. And even now, Even in this hate, as men in some great battles, By apprehending danger, have achiev’d Almost impossible actions (I have heard soldiers say so), 55 So I through frights and threat’nings will assay This dangerous venture. Let old wives report I wink’d and chose a husband.—Cariola, To thy known secrecy I have given up More than my life,—my fame.
Cari. Both shall be safe; 60 For I ’ll conceal this secret from the world As warily as those that trade in poison Keep poison from their children.
Duch. Thy protestation Is ingenious and hearty; I believe it. Is Antonio come?
Cari. He attends you.
Duch. Good dear soul, 65 Leave me; but place thyself behind the arras, Where thou mayest overhear us. Wish me good speed; For I am going into a wilderness, Where I shall find nor path nor friendly clue To be my guide. [CARIOLA goes behind the arras.] [Enter ANTONIO.] I sent for you: sit down; 70 Take pen and ink, and write: are you ready?
Ant. Yes.
Duch. What did I say?
Ant. That I should write somewhat.
Duch. O, I remember. After these triumphs and this large expense It ’s fit, like thrifty husbands,[3664] we inquire 75 What ’s laid up for to-morrow.
Ant. So please your beauteous excellence.
Duch. Beauteous! Indeed, I thank you. I look young for your sake; You have ta’en my cares upon you.
Ant. I ’ll fetch your grace The particulars of your revenue and expense. 80
Duch. O, you are An upright treasurer, but you mistook; For when I said I meant to make inquiry What ’s laid up for to-morrow, I did mean What ’s laid up yonder for me.
Ant. Where?
Duch. In heaven. 85 I am making my will (as ’t is fit princes should, In perfect memory), and, I pray, sir, tell me, Were not one better make it smiling, thus, Than in deep groans and terrible ghastly looks, As if the gifts we parted with procur’d[3665] 90 That violent distraction?
Ant. O, much better.
Duch. If I had a husband now, this care were quit: But I intend to make you overseer. What good deed shall we first remember? Say.
Ant. Begin with that first good deed began i’ th’ world 95 After man’s creation, the sacrament of marriage. I ’d have you first provide for a good husband; Give him all.
Duch. All!
Ant. Yes, your excellent self.
Duch. In a winding-sheet?
Ant. In a couple.
Duch. Saint Winifred, that were a strange will! 100
Ant. ’T were stranger[3666] if there were no will in you To marry again.
Duch. What do you think of marriage?
Ant. I take ’t, as those that deny purgatory, It locally contains or heaven or hell; There ’s no third place in ’t.
Duch. How do you affect it? 105
Ant. My banishment, feeding my melancholy, Would often reason thus:—
Duch. Pray, let ’s hear it.
Ant. Say a man never marry, nor have children, What takes that from him? Only the bare name Of being a father, or the weak delight 110 To see the little wanton ride a-cock-horse Upon a painted stick, or hear him chatter Like a taught starling.
Duch. Fie, fie, what ’s all this? One of your eyes is blood-shot: use my ring to ’t. They say ’t is very sovereign. ’T was my wedding-ring. 115 And I did vow never to part with it But to my second husband.
Ant. You have parted with it now.
Duch. Yes, to help your eye-sight.
Ant. You have made me stark blind.
Duch. How? 120
Ant. There is a saucy and ambitious devil Is dancing in this circle.
Duch. Remove him.
Ant. How?
Duch. There needs small conjuration, when your finger May do it: thus. Is it fit? [She puts the ring upon his finger]: he kneels.
Ant. What said you?
Duch. Sir, This goodly roof of yours is too low built; 125 I cannot stand upright in ’t nor discourse, Without I raise it higher. Raise yourself; Or, if you please, my hand to help you: so. [Raises him.]
Ant. Ambition, madam, is a great man’s madness, That is not kept in chains and close-pent rooms, But in fair lightsome lodgings, and is girt 131 With the wild noise of prattling visitants, Which makes it lunatic beyond all cure. Conceive not I am so stupid but I aim[3667] Whereto your favours tend: but he ’s a fool 135 That, being a-cold, would thrust his hands i’ th’ fire To warm them.
Duch. So, now the ground ’s broke, You may discover what a wealthy mine I make you lord of.
Ant. O my unworthiness!
Duch. You were ill to sell yourself: 140 This dark’ning of your worth is not like that Which tradesmen use i’ th’ city; their false lights Are to rid bad wares off: and I must tell you, If you will know where breathes a complete man (I speak it without flattery), turn your eyes, 145 And progress through yourself.
Ant. Were there nor heaven nor hell, I should be honest: I have long serv’d virtue, And nev’r ta’en wages of her.
Duch. Now she pays it. The misery of us that are born great! 150 We are forc’d to woo, because none dare woo us; And as a tyrant doubles with his words And fearfully equivocates, so we Are forc’d to express our violent passions In riddles and in dreams, and leave the path 155 Of simple virtue, which was never made To seem the thing it is not. Go, go brag You have left me heartless; mine is in your bosom: I hope ’t will multiply love there. You do tremble: Make not your heart so dead a piece of flesh, 160 To fear more than to love me. Sir, be confident: What is ’t distracts you? This is flesh and blood, sir; ’T is not the figure cut in alabaster Kneels at my husband’s tomb. Awake, awake, man! I do here put off all vain ceremony, 165 And only do appear to you a young widow That claims you for her husband, and, like a widow, I use but half a blush in ’t.
Ant. Truth speak for me; I will remain the constant sanctuary Of your good name.
Duch. I thank you, gentle love: 170 And ’cause you shall not come to me in debt, Being now my steward, here upon your lips I sign your Quietus est.[3668] This you should have begg’d now. I have seen children oft eat sweetmeats thus, As fearful to devour them too soon. 175
Ant. But for your brothers?
Duch. Do not think of them: All discord without this circumference Is only to be pitied, and not fear’d: Yet, should they know it, time will easily Scatter the tempest.
Ant. These words should be mine, 180 And all the parts you have spoke, if some part of it Would not have savour’d flattery.
Duch. Kneel. [CARIOLA comes from behind the arras.]
Ant. Ha!
Duch. Be not amaz’d: this woman ’s of my counsel. I have heard lawyers say, a contract in a chamber Per verba [de] presenti[3669] is absolute marriage. 185 [She and ANTONIO kneel.] Bless, heaven, this sacred gordian,[3670] which let violence Never untwine.
Ant. And may our sweet affections, like the spheres, Be still in motion!
Duch. Quick’ning, and make The like soft music! 190
Ant. That we may imitate the loving palms, Best emblem of a peaceful marriage, That nev’r bore fruit, divided!
Duch. What can the church force more?
Ant. That fortune may not know an accident, 195 Either of joy or sorrow, to divide Our fixed wishes!
Duch. How can the church build faster?[3671] We now are man and wife, and ’t is the church That must but echo this.—Maid, stand apart: I now am blind.
Ant. What ’s your conceit in this? 200
Duch. I would have you lead your fortune by the hand Unto your marriage-bed: (You speak in me this, for we now are one.) We ’ll only lie and talk together, and plot T’ appease my humorous[3672] kindred; and if you please, 205 Like the old tale in Alexander and Lodowick, Lay a naked sword between us, keep us chaste. O, let me shrowd my blushes in your bosom, Since ’t is the treasury of all my secrets! [Exeunt DUCHESS and ANTONIO.]
Cari. Whether the spirit of greatness or of woman 210 Reign most in her, I know not; but it shows A fearful madness. I owe her much of pity. Exit.
Act II, Scene I — [3673]
[Enter] BOSOLA and CASTRUCCIO.
Bos. You say you would fain be taken for an eminent courtier?
Cast. ’T is the very main[3674] of my ambition.
Bos. Let me see: you have a reasonable good face for ’t already, and your night-cap expresses your ears sufficient largely. I would have you (5) learn to twirl the strings of your band with a good grace, and in a set speech, at th’ end of every sentence, to hum three or four times, or blow your nose till it smart again, to recover your memory. When you come to be a (10) president in criminal causes, if you smile upon a prisoner, hang him; but if you frown upon him and threaten him, let him be sure to scape the gallows.
Cast. I would be a very merry president. 15
Bos. Do not sup o’ nights; ’t will beget you an admirable wit.
Cast. Rather it would make me have a good stomach to quarrel; for they say, your roaring boys eat meat seldom, and that makes them so valiant. But how shall I know whether the (20) people take me for an eminent fellow?
Bos. I will teach a trick to know it: give out you lie a-dying, and if you hear the common people curse you, be sure you are taken for one of the prime night-caps.[3675] 25 [Enter an Old Lady.] You come from painting now.
Old Lady. From what?
Bos. Why, from your scurvy face-physic. To behold thee not painted inclines somewhat near a miracle. These in thy face here were deep ruts and foul sloughs the last progress.[3676] There was (31) a lady in France that, having had the small-pox, flayed the skin off her face to make it more level; and whereas before she looked like a nutmeg-grater, after she resembled an abortive hedge-hog. 35
Old Lady. Do you call this painting?
Bos. No, no, but you call [it] careening[3677] of an old morphew’d[3678] lady, to make her disembogue[3679] again: there ’s rough-cast phrase to your plastic.[3680]
Old Lady. It seems you are well acquainted (40) with my closet.
Bos. One would suspect it for a shop of witch-craft, to find in it the fat of serpents, spawn of snakes, Jews’ spittle, and their young children’s ordure; and all these for the face. I would (45) sooner eat a dead pigeon taken from the soles of the feet of one sick of the plague, than kiss one of you fasting. Here are two of you, whose sin of your youth is the very patrimony of the physician; makes him renew his foot-cloth (50) with the spring, and change his high-pric’d courtesan with the fall of the leaf. I do wonder you do not loathe yourselves. Observe my meditation now. What thing is in this outward form of man 55 To be belov’d? We account it ominous, If nature do produce a colt, or lamb, A fawn, or goat, in any limb resembling A man, and fly from ’t as a prodigy. Man stands amaz’d to see his deformity 60 In any other creature but himself. But in our own flesh though we bear diseases Which have their true names only ta’en from beasts,— As the most ulcerous wolf[3681] and swinish measle,[3682]— Though we are eaten up of lice and worms, 65 And though continually we bear about us A rotten and dead body, we delight To hide it in rich tissue: all our fear, Nay, all our terror, is, lest our physician 69 Should put us in the ground to be made sweet.— Your wife ’s gone to Rome: you two couple, and get you to the wells at Lucca to recover your aches. I have other work on foot. [Exeunt CASTRUCCIO and Old Lady.] I observe our duchess 74 Is sick a-days, she pukes, her stomach seethes, The fins of her eye-lids look most teeming blue,[3683] She wanes i’ th’ cheek, and waxes fat i’ th’ flank, And, contrary to our Italian fashion, Wears a loose-bodied gown: there’s somewhat in ’t. I have a trick may chance discover it, 80 A pretty one; I have bought some apricocks, The first our spring yields.
[Enter ANTONIO and DELIO, talking together apart.]
Delio. And so long since married? You amaze me.
Ant. Let me seal your lips for ever: For, did I think that anything but th’ air Could carry these words from you, I should wish 85 You had no breath at all.—Now, sir, in your contemplation? You are studying to become a great wise fellow.
Bos. O, sir, the opinion of wisdom is a foul tetter[3684] that runs all over a man’s body: if simplicity direct us to have no evil, it directs us (90) to a happy being; for the subtlest folly proceeds from the subtlest wisdom. Let me be simply honest.
Ant. I do understand your inside.
Bos. Do you so?
Ant. Because you would not seem to appear to th’ world 95 Puff’d up with your preferment, you continue This out-of-fashion melancholy: leave it, leave it.
Bos. Give me leave to be honest in any phrase, in any compliment whatsoever. Shall I confess myself to you? I look no higher than 100 I can reach: they are the gods that must ride on winged horses. A lawyer’s mule of a slow pace will both suit my disposition and business; for, mark me, when a man’s mind rides faster than his horse can gallop, they quickly both (105) tire.
Ant. You would look up to heaven, but I think The devil, that rules i’ th’ air, stands in your light.
Bos. O, sir, you are lord of the ascendant,[3685] chief man with the duchess: a duke was your (110) cousin-german remov’d. Say you were lineally descended from King Pepin, or he himself, what of this? Search the heads of the greatest rivers in the world, you shall find them but bubbles of water. Some would think the souls of princes 115 were brought forth by some more weighty cause than those of meaner persons: they are deceiv’d, there’s the same hand to them; the like passions sway them; the same reason that makes a vicar go to law for a tithe-pig, and (120) undo his neighbours, makes them spoil a whole province, and batter down goodly cities with the cannon.
[Enter DUCHESS and Ladies.]
Duch. Your arm, Antonio: do I not grow fat? I am exceeding short-winded.—Bosola, 125 I would have you, sir, provide for me a litter; Such a one as the Duchess of Florence rode in.
Bos. The duchess us’d one when she was great with child.
Duch. I think she did.—Come hither, mend my ruff: 129 Here, when? thou art such a tedious lady; and Thy breath smells of lemon-pills: wouldst thou hadst done! Shall I swoon under thy fingers? I am So troubled with the mother![3686]
Bos. [Aside.] I fear, too much.
Duch. I have heard you say that the French courtiers Wear their hats on ’fore the king. 135
Ant. I have seen it.
Duch. In the presence?
Ant. Yes.
Duch. Why should not we bring up that fashion? ’T is ceremony more than duty that consists In the removing of a piece of felt. Be you the example to the rest o’ th’ court; 140 Put on your hat first.
Ant. You must pardon me: I have seen, in colder countries than in France, Nobles stand bare to th’ prince; and the distinction Methought show’d reverently.
Bos. I have a present for your grace.
Duch. For me, sir? 145
Bos. Apricocks, madam.
Duch. O, sir, where are they? I have heard of none to-year.[3687]
Bos. [Aside.] Good; her colour rises.
Duch. Indeed, I thank you: they are wondrous fair ones. What an unskilful fellow is our gardener! We shall have none this month. 150
Bos. Will not your grace pare them?
Duch. No: they taste of musk, methinks; indeed they do.
Bos. I know not: yet I wish your grace had par’d ’em.
Duch. Why?
Bos. I forgot to tell you, the knave gardener, Only to raise his profit by them the sooner, 155 Did ripen them in horse-dung.
Duch. O, you jest.— You shall judge: pray, taste one.
Ant. Indeed, madam, I do not love the fruit.
Duch. Sir, you are loth To rob us of our dainties. ’T is a delicate fruit; They say they are restorative.
Bos. ’T is a pretty art, 160 This grafting.
Duch. ’T is so; a bett’ring of nature.
Bos. To make a pippin grow upon a crab, A damson on a black-thorn.—[Aside.] How greedily she eats them! A whirlwind strike off these bawd farthingales! For, but for that and the loose-bodied gown, 166 I should have discover’d apparently[3688] The young springal[3689] cutting a caper in her belly.
Duch. I thank you, Bosola: they were right good ones, If they do not make me sick.
Ant. How, now, madam! 170
Duch. This green fruit and my stomach are not friends: How they swell me!
Bos. [Aside.] Nay, you are too much swell’d already.
Duch. O, I am in an extreme cold sweat!
Bos. I am very sorry. [Exit.]
Duch. Lights to my chamber!—O good Antonio, 175 I fear I am undone!
Delio. Lights there, lights! Exeunt DUCHESS [and Ladies].
Ant. O my most trusty Delio, we are lost! I fear she’s fall’n in labour; and there’s left No time for her remove.
Delio. Have you prepar’d Those ladies to attend her; and procur’d 180 That politic safe conveyance for the midwife Your duchess plotted?
Ant. I have.
Delio. Make use, then, of this forc’d occasion. Give out that Bosola hath poison’d her With these apricocks; that will give some colour 185 For her keeping close.
Ant. Fie, fie, the physicians Will then flock to her.
Delio. For that you may pretend She’ll use some prepar’d antidote of her own, Lest the physicians should re-poison her. 190
Ant. I am lost in amazement: I know not what to think on ’t. Exeunt.
Act II, Scene II — [3690]
[Enter] BOSOLA and Old Lady.
Bos. So, so, there’s no question but her techiness[3691] and most vulturous eating of the apricocks are apparent signs of breeding.—Now?
Old Lady. I am in haste, sir.
Bos. There was a young waiting-woman had a monstrous desire to see the glass-house—— 6
Old Lady. Nay, pray, let me go.
Bos. And it was only to know what strange instrument it was should swell up a glass to the fashion of a woman’s belly. 10
Old Lady. I will hear no more of the glass-house. You are still[3692] abusing women!
Bos. Who? I? No; only, by the way now and then, mention your frailties. The orange-tree bears ripe and green fruit and blossoms all (15) together; and some of you give entertainment for pure love, but more for more precious reward. The lusty spring smells well; but drooping autumn tastes well. If we have the same golden showers that rained in the time of (20) Jupiter the thunderer, you have the same Danäes still, to hold up their laps to receive them. Didst thou never study the mathematics?
Old Lady. What’s that, sir? 25
Bos. Why, to know the trick how to make a many lines meet in one centre. Go, go, give your foster-daughters good counsel: tell them, that the devil takes delight to hang at a woman’s girdle, like a false rusty watch, that (30) she cannot discern how the time passes. [Exit Old Lady.]
[Enter ANTONIO, RODERIGO, and GRISOLAN.]
Ant. Shut up the court-gates.
Rod. Why, sir? What’s the danger?
Ant. Shut up the posterns presently, and call All the officers o’ th’ court.
Gris. I shall instantly. [Exit.]
Ant. Who keeps the key o’ th’ park-gate?
Rod. Forobosco. 35
Ant. Let him bring ’t presently.
[Re-enter GRISOLAN with Servants.]
1 Serv. O, gentleman o’ th’ court, the foulest treason!
Bos. [Aside.] If that these apricocks should be poison’d now, Without my knowledge?
1 Serv. There was taken even now a Switzer in the duchess’ bed-chamber——- 40
2 Serv. A Switzer!
1 Serv. With a pistol in his great codpiece.
Bos. Ha, ha, ha!
1 Serv. The codpiece was the case for ’t.
2 Serv. There was a cunning traitor. Who would have search’d his codpiece? 46
1 Serv. True; if he had kept out of the ladies’ chambers. And all the moulds of his buttons were leaden bullets.
2 Serv. O wicked cannibal! A fire-lock in ’s codpiece! 50
1 Serv. ’T was a French plot, upon my life.
2 Serv. To see what the devil can do!
Ant. [Are] all the officers here?
Servants. We are.
Ant. Gentlemen, 55 We have lost much plate you know; and but this evening Jewels, to the value of four thousand ducats, Are missing in the duchess’ cabinet. Are the gates shut?
Serv. Yes.
Ant. ’T is the duchess’ pleasure Each officer be lock’d into his chamber 60 Till the sun-rising; and to send the keys Of all their chests and of their outward doors Into her bed-chamber. She is very sick.
Rod. At her pleasure.
Ant. She entreats you take ’t not ill: the innocent 65 Shall be the more approv’d by it.
Bos. Gentlemen o’ th’ wood-yard, where’s your Switzer now?
1 Serv. By this hand, ’t was credibly reported by one o’ th’ black guard.[3693] 70 [Exeunt all except ANTONIO and DELIO.]
Delio. How fares it with the duchess?
Ant. She’s expos’d Unto the worst of torture, pain and fear.
Delio. Speak to her all happy comfort.
Ant. How I do play the fool with mine own danger! You are this night, dear friend, to post to Rome: 75 My life lies in your service.
Delio. Do not doubt me.
Ant. O, ’t is far from me: and yet fear presents me Somewhat that looks like danger.
Delio. Believe it, ’T is but the shadow of your fear, no more. How superstitiously we mind our evils! 80 The throwing down salt, or crossing of a hare, Bleeding at nose, the stumbling of a horse, Or singing of a cricket, are of power To daunt whole man in us. Sir, fare you well: I wish you all the joys of a bless’d father; 85 And, for my faith, lay this unto your breast,— Old friends, like old swords, still are trusted best. [Exit.]
[Enter CARIOLA.]
Cari. Sir, you are the happy father of a son: Your wife commends him to you.
Ant. Blessed comfort!— For heaven’ sake, tend her well: I ’ll presently[3694] Go set a figure for ’s nativity.[3695] Exeunt. 91
Act II, Scene III — [3696]
[Enter BOSOLA, with a dark lantern.]
Bos. Sure I did hear a woman shriek: list, ha! And the sound came, if I receiv’d it right, From the duchess’ lodgings. There’s some stratagem In the confining all our courtiers To their several wards: I must have part of it; My intelligence will freeze else. List, again! 5 It may be ’t was the melancholy bird, Best friend of silence and of solitariness, The owl, that scream’d so.—Ha! Antonio!
[Enter ANTONIO with a candle, his sword drawn.]
Ant. I heard some noise.—Who’s there? What art thou? Speak. 10
Bos. Antonio, put not your face nor body To such a forc’d expression of fear; I am Bosola, your friend.
Ant. Bosola!— [Aside.] This mole does undermine me.—Heard you not A noise even now?
Bos. From whence?
Ant. From the duchess’ lodging. 15
Bos. Not I: did you?
Ant. I did, or else I dream’d.
Bos. Let ’s walk towards it.
Ant. No: it may be ’t was But the rising of the wind.
Bos. Very likely. Me thinks ’t is very cold, and yet you sweat: You look wildly.
Ant. I have been setting a figure[3697] 20 For the duchess’ jewels.
Bos. Ah, and how falls your question? Do you find it radical?[3698]
Ant. What’s that to you? ’T is rather to be question’d what design, When all men were commanded to their lodgings, Makes you a night-walker.
Bos. In sooth, I ’ll tell you: 25 Now all the court’s asleep, I thought the devil Had least to do here; I came to say my prayers; And if it do offend you I do so, You are a fine courtier.
Ant. [Aside.] This fellow will undo me,— You gave the duchess apricocks to-day: 30 Pray heaven they were not poison’d!
Bos. Poison’d! a Spanish fig For the imputation!
Ant. Traitors are ever confident Till they are discover’d. There were jewels stol’n too: In my conceit, none are to be suspected 35 More than yourself.
Bos. You are a false steward.
Ant. Saucy slave, I ’ll pull thee up by the roots.
Bos. May be the ruin will crush you to pieces.
Ant. You are an impudent snake indeed, sir: Are you scarce warm, and do you show your sting? 40 You libel[3699] well, sir?
Bos. No, sir: copy it out, And I will set my hand to ’t.
Ant. [Aside.] My nose bleeds. One that were superstitious would count This ominous, when it merely comes by chance. Two letters, that are wrought here for my name,[3700] 45 Are drown’d in blood! Mere accident.—For you, sir, I ’ll take order I’ th’ morn you shall be safe.—[Aside.] ’Tis that must colour Her lying-in.—Sir, this door you pass not: I do not hold it fit that you come near 50 The duchess’ lodgings, till you have quit yourself.— [Aside.] The great are like the base, nay, they are the same, When they seek shameful ways to avoid shame. Exit.
Bos. Antonio hereabout did drop a paper:— Some of your help, false friend.[3701]—O, here it is. What’s here? a child’s nativity calculated! [Reads.] 56 ‛The duchess was deliver’d of a son, ’tween the hours twelve and one in the night, Anno Dom. 1504.’—that’s this year—’decimo nono Decembris,’—that’s this night—’taken according (60) to the meridian of Malfi,’—that’s our duchess: happy discovery!—’The lord of the first house being combust in the ascendant signifies short life; and Mars being in a human sign, joined to the tail of the Dragon, in the eighth (65) house, doth threaten a violent death. Caetera non scrutantur.’[3702] Why, now ’t is most apparent; this precise fellow Is the duchess’ bawd:—I have it to my wish! This is a parcel of intelligency[3703] 70 Our courtiers were cas’d up for: it needs must follow That I must be committed on pretence Of poisoning her; which I ’ll endure, and laugh at. If one could find the father now! but that Time will discover. Old Castruccio 75 I’ th’ morning posts to Rome: by him I ’ll send A letter that shall make her brothers’ galls O’erflow their livers. This was a thrifty[3704] way! Though Lust do mask in ne’er so strange disguise, She ’s oft found witty, but is never wise. [Exit] 80
Act II, Scene IV — [3705]
[Enter] CARDINAL and JULIA.
Card. Sit: thou art my best of wishes. Prithee, tell me What trick didst thou invent to come to Rome Without thy husband?
Julia. Why, my lord, I told him I came to visit an old anchorite[3706] Here for devotion.
Card. Thou art a witty false one,— 5 I mean, to him.
Julia. You have prevail’d with me Beyond my strongest thoughts; I would not now Find you inconstant.
Card. Do not put thyself To such a voluntary torture, which proceeds Out of your own guilt.
Julia. How, my lord!
Card. You fear 10 My constancy, because you have approv’d[3707] Those giddy and wild turnings in yourself.
Julia. Did you e’er find them?
Card. Sooth, generally for women, A man might strive to make glass malleable, Ere he should make them fixed.
Julia. So, my lord. 15
Card. We had need go borrow that fantastic glass Invented by Galileo the Florentine To view another spacious world i’ th’ moon, And look to find a constant woman there.
Julia. This is very well, my lord.
Card. Why do you weep? 20 Are tears your justification? The self-same tears Will fall into your husband’s bosom, lady, With a loud protestation that you love him Above the world. Come, I ’ll love you wisely, That ’s jealously; since I am very certain 25 You cannot make me cuckold.
Julia. I ’ll go home To my husband.
Card. You may thank me, lady, I have taken you off your melancholy perch, Bore you upon my fist, and show’d you game, And let you fly at it.—I pray thee, kiss me.— 30 When thou wast with thy husband, thou wast watch’d Like a tame elephant:—still you are to thank me:— Thou hadst only kisses from him and high feeding: But what delight was that? ’T was just like one That hath a little fing’ring on the lute, 35 Yet cannot tune it:—still you are to thank me.
Julia. You told me of a piteous wound i’ th’ heart, And a sick liver, when you woo’d me first, And spake like one in physic.[3708]
Card. Who’s that?—— [Enter Servant.] Rest firm for my affection to thee, 40 Lightning moves slow to ’t.
Serv. Madam, a gentleman That ’s comes post from Malfi, desires to see you.
Card. Let him enter: I ’ll withdraw. Exit.
Serv. He says Your husband, old Castruccio, is come to Rome, Most pitifully tir’d with riding post. [Exit.] 45
[Enter DELIO.]
Julia. [Aside.] Signior Delio! ’t is one of my old suitors.
Delio. I was bold to come and see you.
Julia. Sir, you are welcome.
Delio. Do you lie here?
Julia. Sure, your own experience Will satisfy you no: our Roman prelates Do not keep lodging for ladies.
Delio. Very well: 50 I have brought you no commendations from your husband, For I know none by him.
Julia. I hear he ’s come to Rome.
Delio. I never knew man and beast, of a horse and a knight, So weary of each other. If he had had a good back, He would have undertook to have borne his horse, 55 His breech was so pitifully sore.
Julia. Your laughter Is my pity.
Delio. Lady, I know not whether You want money, but I have brought you some.
Julia. From my husband?
Delio. No, from mine own allowance. 60
Julia. I must hear the condition, ere I be bound to take it.
Delio. Look on ’t, ’t is gold; hath it not a fine colour?
Julia. I have a bird more beautiful.
Delio. Try the sound on ’t.
Julia. A lute-string far exceeds it. It hath no smell, like cassia or civet; 65 Nor is it physical,[3709] though some fond doctors Persuade us seethe ’t in cullises.[3710] I ’ll tell you, This is a creature bred by——
[Re-enter Servant.]
Serv. Your husband ’s come, Hath deliver’d a letter to the Duke of Calabria That, to my thinking, hath put him out of his wits. Exit. 70
Julia. Sir, you hear: Pray, let me know your business and your suit As briefly as can be.
Delio. With good speed: I would wish you, At such time as you are non-resident 75 With your husband, my mistress.
Julia. Sir, I ’ll go ask my husband if I shall, And straight return your answer. Exit.
Delio. Very fine! Is this her wit, or honesty, that speaks thus? I heard one say the duke was highly mov’d 80 With a letter sent from Malfi. I do fear Antonio is betray’d. How fearfully Shows his ambition now! Unfortunate fortune! They pass through whirl-pools, and deep woes do shun, Who the event weigh ere the action ’s done. 85
Act II, Scene V — [3711]
[Enter] CARDINAL and FERDINAND with a letter.
Ferd. I have this night digg’d up a mandrake.[3712]
Card. Say you?
Ferd. And I am grown mad with ’t.
Card. What ’s the prodigy?
Ferd. Read there,—a sister damn’d: she ’s loose i’ th’ hilts;[3713] Grown a notorious strumpet.
Card. Speak lower.
Ferd. Lower! Rogues do not whisper ’t now, but seek to publish ’t 5 (As servants do the bounty of their lords) Aloud; and with a covetous searching eye, To mark who note them. O, confusion seize her! She hath had most cunning bawds to serve her turn, And more secure conveyances for lust 10 Than towns of garrison for service.
Card. Is ’t possible? Can this be certain?
Ferd. Rhubarb, O, for rhubarb To purge this choler! Here ’s the cursed day To prompt my memory; and here ’t shall stick Till of her bleeding heart I make a sponge 15 To wipe it out.
Card. Why do you make yourself So wild a tempest?
Ferd. Would I could be one, That I might toss her palace ’bout her ears, Root up her goodly forests, blast her meads, And lay her general territory as waste 20 As she hath done her honours.
Card. Shall our blood, The royal blood of Arragon and Castile, Be thus attainted?
Ferd. Apply desperate physic: We must not now use balsamum, but fire, The smarting cupping-glass, for that ’s the mean 25 To purge infected blood, such blood as hers. There is a kind of pity in mine eye,— I ’ll give it to my handkercher; and now ’t is here, I ’ll bequeath this to her bastard.
Card. What to do?
Ferd. Why, to make soft lint for his mother’s wounds, 30 When I have hew’d her to pieces.
Card. Curs’d creature! Unequal nature, to place women’s hearts So far upon the left side![3714]
Ferd. Foolish men, That e’er will trust their honour in a bark Made of so slight weak bulrush as is woman, 35 Apt every minute to sink it!
Card. Thus ignorance, when it hath purchas’d honour, It cannot wield it.
Ferd. Methinks I see her laughing.— Excellent hyena! Talk to me somewhat quickly, Or my imagination will carry me 40 To see her in the shameful act of sin.
Card. With whom?
Ferd. Happily with some strong-thigh’d bargeman, Or one o’ th’ wood-yard that can quoit the sledge[3715] Or toss the bar, or else some lovely squire That carries coals up to her privy lodgings. 45
Card. You fly beyond your reason.
Ferd. Go to, mistress! ’T is not your whore’s milk that shall quench my wild-fire, But your whore’s blood.
Card. How idly shows this rage, which carries you, As men convey’d by witches through the air, 50 On violent whirlwinds! This intemperate noise Fitly resembles deaf men’s shrill discourse, Who talk aloud, thinking all other men To have their imperfection.
Ferd. Have not you My palsy?
Card. Yes, [but] I can be angry 55 Without this rupture. There is not in nature A thing that makes man so deform’d, so beastly, As doth intemperate anger. Chide yourself. You have divers men who never yet express’d Their strong desire of rest but by unrest, 60 By vexing of themselves. Come, put yourself In tune.
Ferd. So I will only study to seem The thing I am not. I could kill her now, In you, or in myself; for I do think It is some sin in us heaven doth revenge 65 By her.
Card. Are you stark mad?
Ferd. I would have their bodies Burnt in a coal-pit with the ventage stopp’d, That their curs’d smoke might not ascend to heaven; Or dip the sheets they lie in in pitch or sulphur, 70 Wrap them in ’t, and then light them like a match; Or else to-boil[3716] their bastard to a cullis, And give ’t his lecherous father to renew The sin of his back.
Card. I ’ll leave you.
Ferd. Nay, I have done. I am confident, had I been damn’d in hell, 75 And should have heard of this, it would have put me Into a cold sweat. In, in; I’ll go sleep. Till I know who leaps my sister, I ’ll not stir: That known, I ’ll find scorpions to string my whips. And fix her in a general eclipse. Exeunt. 80
Act III, Scene I — [3717]
[Enter] ANTONIO and DELIO.
Ant. Our noble friend, my most beloved Delio! O, you have been a stranger long at court: Came you along with the Lord Ferdinand?
Delio. I did, sir: and how fares your noble duchess?
Ant. Right fortunately well: she ’s an excellent 5 Feeder of pedigrees; since you last saw her, She hath had two children more, a son and daughter.
Delio. Methinks ’t was yesterday. Let me but wink, And not behold your face, which to mine eye Is somewhat leaner, verily I should dream 10 It were within this half hour.
Ant. You have not been in law, friend Delio, Nor in prison, nor a suitor at the court, Nor begg’d the reversion of some great man’s place, Nor troubled with an old wife, which doth make 15 Your time so insensibly hasten.
Delio. Pray, sir, tell me, Hath not this news arriv’d yet to the ear Of the lord cardinal?
Ant. I fear it hath: The Lord Ferdinand, that ’s newly come to court, Doth bear himself right dangerously.
Delio. Pray, why? 20
Ant. He is so quiet that he seems to sleep The tempest out, as dormice do in winter. Those houses that are haunted are most still Till the devil be up.
Delio. What say the common people?
Ant. The common rabble do directly say 25 She is a strumpet.
Delio. And your graver heads Which would be politic, what censure they?
Ant. They do observe I grow to infinite purchase,[3718] The left hand way; and all suppose the duchess Would amend it, if she could; for, say they, 30 Great princes, though they grudge their officers Should have such large and unconfined means To get wealth under them, will not complain, Lest thereby they should make them odious Unto the people. For other obligation 35 Of love or marriage between her and me They never dream of.
Delio. The Lord Ferdinand Is going to bed.
[Enter DUCHESS, FERDINAND, and Attendants.]
Ferd. I ’ll instantly to bed, For I am weary.—I am to bespeak A husband for you.
Duch. For me, sir! Pray, who is ’t? 40
Ferd. The great Count Malatesti.
Duch. Fie upon him! A count! He’s a mere stick of sugar-candy; You may look quite through him. When I choose A husband, I will marry for your honour.
Ferd. You shall do well in ’t.—How is ’t, worthy Antonio? 45
Duch. But, sir, I am to have private conference with you About a scandalous report is spread Touching mine honour.
Ferd. Let me be ever deaf to ’t: One of Pasquil’s paper-bullets,[3719] court-calumny, A pestilent air, which princes’ palaces 50 Are seldom purg’d of. Yet, say that it were true, I pour it in your bosom, my fix’d love Would strongly excuse, extenuate, nay, deny Faults, were they apparent in you. Go, be safe In your own innocency.
Duch. [Aside.] O bless’d comfort! 55 This deadly air is purg’d. Exeunt [DUCHESS, ANTONIO, DELIO, and Attendants.]
Ferd. Her guilt treads on Hot-burning coulters.[3720] [Enter BOSOLA.] Now, Bosola, How thrives our intelligence?[3721]
Bos. Sir, uncertainly: ’T is rumour’d she hath had three bastards, but By whom we may go read i’ th’ stars.
Ferd. Why, some 60 Hold opinion all things are written there.
Bos. Yes, if we could find spectacles to read them. I do suspect there hath been some sorcery Us’d on the duchess.
Ferd. Sorcery! to what purpose?
Bos. To make her dote on some desertless fellow 65 She shames to acknowledge.
Ferd. Can your faith give way To think there ’s power in potions or in charms, To make us love whether we will or no?
Bos. Most certainly.
Ferd. Away! these are mere gulleries,[3722] horrid things, 70 Invented by some cheating mountebanks To abuse us. Do you think that herbs or charms Can force the will? Some trials have been made In this foolish practice, but the ingredients Were lenitive[3723] poisons, such as are of force 75 To make the patient mad; and straight the witch Swears by equivocation they are in love. The witch-craft lies in her rank blood. This night I will force confession from her. You told me You had got, within these two days, a false key 80 Into her bed-chamber.
Bos. I have.
Ferd. As I would wish.
Bos. What do you intend to do?
Ferd. Can you guess?
Bos. No.
Ferd. Do not ask, then: He that can compass me, and know my drifts, May say he hath put a girdle ’bout the world, And sounded all her quick-sands.
Bos. I do not 85 Think so.
Ferd. What do you think, then, pray?
Bos. That you Are your own chronicle too much, and grossly Flatter yourself.
Ferd. Give me thy hand; I thank thee: I never gave pension but to flatterers, Till I entertained thee. Farewell. 90 That friend a great man’s ruin strongly checks, Who rails into his belief all his defects. Exeunt.
Act III, Scene II — [3724]
Enter DUCHESS, ANTONIO, and CARIOLA.
Duch. Bring me the casket hither, and the glass.— You get no lodging here to-night, my lord.
Ant. Indeed, I must persuade one.
Duch. Very good: I hope in time ’t will grow into a custom, That noblemen shall come with cap and knee 5 To purchase a night’s lodging of their wives.
Ant. I must lie here.
Duch. Must! You are a lord of mis-rule.
Ant. Indeed, my rule is only in the night.
Duch. To what use will you put me?
Ant. We ’ll sleep together.
Duch. Alas, what pleasure can two lovers find in sleep? 10
Cari. My lord, I lie with her often, and I know She ’ll much disquiet you.
Ant. See, you are complain’d of.
Cari. For she’s the sprawling’st bedfellow.
Ant. I shall like her the better for that.
Cari. Sir, shall I ask you a question? 15
Ant. I pray thee, Cariola.
Cari. Wherefore still when you lie with my lady Do you rise so early?
Ant. Labouring men Count the clock oft’nest, Cariola, Are glad when their task’s ended.
Duch. I ’ll stop your mouth. [Kisses him.] 20
Ant. Nay, that ’s but one; Venus had two soft doves To draw her chariot; I must have another.— [She kisses him again.] When wilt thou marry, Cariola?
Cari. Never, my lord.
Ant. O, fie upon this single life! forgo it. We read how Daphne, for her peevish [flight,][3725] Became a fruitless bay-tree; Syrinx turn’d 26 To the pale empty reed; Anaxarete Was frozen into marble: whereas those Which married, or prov’d kind unto their friends, Were by a gracious influence trans-shap’d 30 Into the olive, pomegranate, mulberry, Became flowers, precious stones, or eminent stars.
Cari. This is a vain poetry: but I pray you, tell me, If there were propos’d me, wisdom, riches, and beauty, In three several young men, which should I choose? 35
Ant. ’T is a hard question. This was Paris’ case, And he was blind in ’t, and there was a great cause; For how was ’t possible he could judge right, Having three amorous goddesses in view, And they stark naked? ’T was a motion 40 Were able to benight the apprehension Of the severest counsellor of Europe. Now I look on both your faces so well form’d, It puts me in mind of a question I would ask.
Cari. What is ’t?
Ant. I do wonder why hard-favour’d ladies, For the most part, keep worse-favour’d waiting-women 46 To attend them, and cannot endure fair ones.
Duch. O, that ’s soon answer’d. Did you ever in your life know an ill painter Desire to have his dwelling next door to the shop 50 Of an excellent picture-maker? ’T would disgrace His face-making, and undo him. I prithee, When were we so merry? My hair tangles.
Ant. Pray thee, Cariola, let’s steal forth the room, And let her talk to herself: I have divers times Serv’d her the like, when she hath chaf’d extremely. 56 I love to see her angry. Softly, Cariola. Exeunt [ANTONIO and CARIOLA].
Duch. Doth not the colour of my hair ’gin to change? When I wax gray, I shall have all the court Powder their hair with arras,[3726] to be like me. 60 You have cause to love me; I ent’red you into my heart [Enter FERDINAND unseen.] Before you would vouchsafe to call for the keys. We shall one day have my brothers take you napping. Methinks his presence, being now in court, Should make you keep your own bed; but you ’ll say 65 Love mixt with fear is sweetest. I ’ll assure you, You shall get no more children till my brothers Consent to be your gossips. Have you lost your tongue? ’Tis welcome: 69 For know, whether I am doom’d to live or die, I can do both like a prince.
Ferd. Die, then, quickly. Giving her a poniard. Virtue, where art thou hid? What hideous thing Is it that doth eclipse thee?
Duch. Pray, sir, hear me.
Ferd. Or is it true thou art but a bare name, And no essential thing?
Duch. Sir——
Ferd. Do not speak. 75
Duch. No, sir: I will plant my soul in mine ears, to hear you.
Ferd. O most imperfect light of human reason, That mak’st [us] so unhappy to foresee What we can least prevent! Pursue thy wishes, And glory in them: there ’s in shame no comfort 81 But to be past all bounds and sense of shame.
Duch. I pray, sir, hear me: I am married.
Ferd. So!
Duch. Happily, not to your liking: but for that, Alas, your shears do come untimely now 85 To clip the bird’s wings that ’s already flown! Will you see my husband?
Ferd. Yes, if I could change Eyes with a basilisk.
Duch. Sure, you came hither By his confederacy.
Ferd. The howling of a wolf 89 Is music to thee, screech-owl: prithee, peace.— Whate’er thou art that hast enjoy’d my sister, For I am sure thou hear’st me, for thine own sake Let me not know thee. I came hither prepar’d To work thy discovery; yet am now persuaded It would beget such violent effects 95 As would damn us both. I would not for ten millions I had beheld thee: therefore use all means I never may have knowledge of thy name; Enjoy thy lust still, and a wretched life, On that condition.—And for thee, vild woman, If thou do wish thy lecher may grow old 101 In thy embracements, I would have thee build Such a room for him as our anchorites To holier use inhabit. Let not the sun Shine on him till he ’s dead; let dogs and monkeys 105 Only converse with him, and such dumb things To whom nature denies use to sound his name; Do not keep a paraquito, lest she learn it; If thou do love him, cut out thine own tongue, Lest it bewray him.
Duch. Why might not I marry? 110 I have not gone about in this to create Any new world or custom.
Ferd. Thou art undone; And thou hast ta’en that massy sheet of lead That hid thy husband’s bones, and folded it About my heart.
Duch. Mine bleeds for ’t.
Ferd. Thine! thy heart! 115 What should I name ’t, unless a hollow bullet Fill’d with unquenchable wild-fire?
Duch. You are in this Too strict; and were you not my princely brother, I would say, too wilful: my reputation Is safe.
Ferd. Dost thou know what reputation is? I ’ll tell thee,—to small purpose, since th’ instruction 121 Comes now too late. Upon a time Reputation, Love, and Death, Would travel o’er the world; and it was concluded That they should part, and take three several ways. 125 Death told them, they should find him in great battles, Or cities plagu’d with plagues; Love gives them counsel To inquire for him ’mongst unambitious shepherds, Where dowries were not talk’d of and sometimes ’Mongst quiet kindred that had nothing left 130 By their dead parents: ’Stay,’ quoth Reputation, ’Do not forsake me; for it is my nature, If once I part from any man I meet, I am never found again.’ And so for you: You have shook hands with Reputation, 135 And made him invisible. So, fare you well: I will never see you more.
Duch. Why should only I, Of all the other princes of the world, Be cas’d up, like a holy relic? I have youth And a little beauty.
Ferd. So you have some virgins 140 That are witches. I will never see thee more. Exit.
Re-enter ANTONIO with a pistol, [and CARIOLA.]
Duch. You saw this apparition?
Ant. Yes: we are Betray’d. How came he hither? I should turn This to thee, for that.
Cari. Pray, sir, do; and when That you have cleft my heart, you shall read there 145 Mine innocence.
Duch. That gallery gave him entrance.
Ant. I would this terrible thing would come again, That, standing on my guard, I might relate My warrantable love.— (She shows the poniard.) Ha! what means this?
Duch. He left this with me.
Ant. And it seems did wish 150 You would use it on yourself.
Duch. His action seem’d To intend so much.
Ant. This hath a handle to ’t, As well as a point: turn it towards him, and So fasten the keen edge in his rank gall. [Knocking within.] How now! who knocks? More earthquakes?
Duch. I stand 155 As if a mine beneath my feet were ready To be blown up.
Cari. ’T is Bosola.
Duch. Away! O misery! methinks unjust actions Should wear these masks and curtains, and not we. You must instantly part hence: I have fashion’d it already. 160 Exit ANTONIO.
[Enter BOSOLA.]
Bos. The duke your brother is ta’en up in a whirlwind; Hath took horse, and ’s rid post to Rome.
Duch. So late?
Bos. He told me, as he mounted into th’ saddle, You were undone.
Duch. Indeed, I am very near it.
Bos. What’s the matter? 165
Duch. Antonio, the master of our household, Hath dealt so falsely with me in ’s accounts. My brother stood engag’d with me for money Ta’en up of certain Neapolitan Jews, And Antonio lets the bonds be forfeit. 170
Bos. Strange!—[Aside.] This is cunning.
Duch. And hereupon My brother’s bills at Naples are protested Against.—Call up our officers.
Bos. I shall. Exit.
[Re-enter ANTONIO.]
Duch. The place that you must fly to is Ancona: Hire a house there; I ’ll send after you 175 My treasure and my jewels. Our weak safety Runs upon enginous wheels:[3727] short syllables Must stand for periods. I must now accuse you Of such a feigned crime as Tasso calls Magnanima menzogna, a noble lie, 180 ’Cause it must shield our honours.—Hark! they are coming.
[Re-enter BOSOLA and Officers.]
Ant. Will your grace hear me?
Duch. I have got well by you; you have yielded me A million of loss: I am like to inherit The people’s curses for your stewardship. 185 You had the trick in audit-time to be sick, Till I had sign’d your quietus;[3728] and that cur’d you Without help of a doctor.—Gentlemen, I would have this man be an example to you all; So shall you hold my favour; I pray, let him; For h’as done that, alas, you would not think of, 191 And, because I intend to be rid of him, I mean not to publish.—Use your fortune elsewhere.
Ant. I am strongly arm’d to brook my overthrow, As commonly men bear with a hard year. 195 I will not blame the cause on ’t; but do think The necessity of my malevolent star Procures this, not her humour. O, the inconstant And rotten ground of service! You may see, ’T is even like him, that in a winter night, 200 Takes a long slumber o’er a dying fire, A-loth to part from ’t; yet parts thence as cold As when he first sat down.
Duch. We do confiscate, Towards the satisfying of your accounts, All that you have.
Ant. I am all yours; and ’t is very fit 205 All mine should be so.
Duch. So, sir, you have your pass.
Ant. You may see, gentlemen, what ’t is to serve A prince with body and soul. Exit.
Bos. Here ’s an example for extortion: what moisture is drawn out of the sea, when foul (210) weather comes, pours down, and runs into the sea again.
Duch. I would know what are your opinions Of this Antonio. 214
2 Off. He could not abide to see a pig’s head gaping: I thought your grace would find him a Jew.
3 Off. I would you had been his officer, for your own sake.
4 Off. You would have had more money. 220
1 Off. He stopp’d his ears with black wool, and to those came to him for money said he was thick of hearing.
2 Off. Some said he was an hermaphrodite, for he could not abide a woman. 225
4 Off. How scurvy proud he would look when the treasury was full! Well, let him go.
1 Off. Yes, and the chippings of the buttery fly after him, to scour his gold chain.[3729] 229
Duch. Leave us.—— Exeunt [Officers]. What do you think of these?
Bos. That these are rogues that in ’s prosperity, But to have waited on his fortune, could have wish’d His dirty stirrup riveted through their noses, And follow’d after ’s mule, like a bear in a ring; 235 Would have prostituted their daughters to his lust; Made their first-born intelligencers;[3730] thought none happy But such as were born under his blest planet, And wore his livery: and do these lice drop off now? Well, never look to have the like again: 240 He hath left a sort[3731] of flatt’ring rogues behind him; Their doom must follow. Princes pay flatterers In their own money: flatterers dissemble their vices, And they dissemble their lies; that ’s justice. Alas, poor gentleman! 245
Duch. Poor! he hath amply fill’d his coffers.
Bos. Sure, he was too honest. Pluto,[3732] the god of riches, When he ’s sent by Jupiter to any man, He goes limping, to signify that wealth That comes on God’s name comes slowly; but when he ’s sent 250 On the devil’s errand, he rides post and comes in by scuttles.[3733] Let me show you what a most unvalu’d jewel You have in a wanton humour thrown away, To bless the man shall find him. He was an excellent Courtier and most faithful; a soldier that thought it 255 As beastly to know his own value too little As devilish to acknowledge it too much. Both his virtue and form deserv’d a far better fortune: His discourse rather delighted to judge itself than show itself: His breast was fill’d with all perfection, 260 And yet it seem’d a private whisp’ring-room, It made so little noise of ’t.
Duch. But he was basely descended.
Bos. Will you make yourself a mercenary herald, Rather to examine men’s pedigrees than virtues? 265 You shall want[3734] him: For know an honest statesman to a prince Is like a cedar planted by a spring; The spring bathes the tree’s root, the grateful tree Rewards it with his shadow: you have not done so. 270 I would sooner swim to the Bermoothes on Two politicians’ rotten bladders, tied Together with an intelligencer’s heart-string, Than depend on so changeable a prince’s favour. Fare thee well, Antonio! Since the malice of the world 275 Would needs down with thee, it cannot be said yet That any ill happen’d unto thee, considering thy fall Was accompanied with virtue.
Duch. O, you render me excellent music!
Bos. Say you?
Duch. This good one that you speak of is my husband. 280
Bos. Do I not dream? Can this ambitious age Have so much goodness in ’t as to prefer A man merely for worth, without these shadows Of wealth and painted honours? Possible?
Duch. I have had three children by him.
Bos. Fortunate lady! 285 For you have made your private nuptial bed The humble and fair seminary of peace, No question but: many an unbenefic’d scholar Shall pray for you for this deed, and rejoice That some preferment in the world can yet 290 Arise from merit. The virgins of your land That have no dowries shall hope your example Will raise them to rich husbands. Should you want Soldiers, ’t would make the very Turks and Moors Turn Christians, and serve you for this act. 295 Last, the neglected poets of your time, In honour of this trophy of a man, Rais’d by that curious engine, your white hand, Shall thank you in your grave for ’t, and make that More reverend than all the cabinets 300 Of living princes. For Antonio, His fame shall likewise flow from many a pen, When heralds shall want coats to sell to men.
Duch. As I taste comfort in this friendly speech, So would I find concealment. 305
Bos. O, the secret of my prince, Which I will wear on th’ inside of my heart!
Duch. You shall take charge of all my coin and jewels, And follow him; for he retires himself To Ancona.
Bos. So.
Duch. Whither, within few days, 310 I mean to follow thee.
Bos. Let me think: I would wish your grace to feign a pilgrimage To our Lady of Loretto, scarce seven leagues From fair Ancona; so may you depart Your country with more honour, and your flight Will seem a princely progress, retaining 316 Your usual train about you.
Duch. Sir, your direction Shall lead me by the hand.
Cari. In my opinion, She were better progress to the baths at Lucca, Or go visit the Spa 320 In Germany; for, if you will believe me, I do not like this jesting with religion, This feigned pilgrimage.
Duch. Thou art a superstitious fool: Prepare us instantly for our departure. 325 Past sorrows, let us moderately lament them, For those to come, seek wisely to prevent them. [Exeunt DUCHESS and CARIOLA.]
Bos. A politician is the devil’s quilted anvil; He fashions all sins on him, and the blows Are never heard: he may work in a lady’s chamber, 330 As here for proof. What rests[3735] but I reveal All to my lord? O, this base quality[3736] Of intelligencer! Why, every quality i’ th’ world Prefers but gain or commendation: Now, for this act I am certain to be rais’d, 335 And men that paint weeds to the life are prais’d. Exit.
Act III, Scene III — [3737]
[Enter] CARDINAL, FERDINAND, MALATESTI, PESCARA, DELIO, and SILVIO.
Card. Must we turn soldier, then?
Mal. The emperor, Hearing your worth that way, ere you attain’d This reverend garment, joins you in commission With the right fortunate soldier the Marquis of Pescara, And the famous Lannoy.
Card. He that had the honour 5 Of taking the French king prisoner?
Mal. The same. Here’s a plot drawn for a new fortification At Naples.
Ferd. This great Count Malatesti, I perceive, Hath got employment?
Delio. No employment, my lord; A marginal note in the muster-book that he is 10 A voluntary lord.
Ferd. He’s no soldier?
Delio. He has worn gun-powder in ’s hollow tooth for the tooth-ache.
Sil. He comes to the leaguer with a full intent To eat fresh beef and garlic, means to stay Till the scent be gone, and straight return to court. 15
Delio. He hath read all the late service As the City Chronicle relates it; And keeps two pewterers going, only to express Battles in model.
Sil. Then he ’ll fight by the book.
Delio. By the almanac, I think, 20 To choose good days and shun the critical; That’s his mistress’ scarf.
Sil. Yes, he protests He would do much for that taffeta.
Delio. I think he would run away from a battle, To save it from taking prisoner.
Sil. He is horribly afraid 25 Gun-powder will spoil the perfume on ’t.
Delio. I saw a Dutchman break his pate once For calling him a pot-gun; he made his head Have a bore in ’t like a musket.
Sil. I would he had made a touch-hole to ’t. 30 He is indeed a guarded sumpter-cloth,[3738] Only for the remove of the court.
[Enter BOSOLA.]
Pes. Bosola arriv’d! What should be the business? Some falling-out among the cardinals. These factions amongst great men, they are like 35 Foxes, when their heads are divided, They carry fire in their tails, and all the country About them goes to wrack for ’t.
Sil. What’s that Bosola?
Delio. I knew him in Padua,—a fantastical scholar, like such who study to know how many knots was in Hercules’ club, of what colour 41 Achilles’ beard was, or whether Hector were not troubled with the tooth-ache. He hath studied himself half blear-ey’d to know the true symmetry of Caesar’s nose by a shoeing-horn; (45) and this he did to gain the name of a speculative man.
Pes. Mark Prince Ferdinand: A very salamander lives in ’s eye, To mock the eager violence of fire. 50
Sil. That cardinal hath made more bad faces with his oppression than ever Michael Angelo made good ones. He lifts up ’s nose, like a foul porpoise before a storm.
Pes. The Lord Ferdinand laughs.
Delio. Like a deadly cannon 55 That lightens ere it smokes.
Pes. These are your true pangs of death, The pangs of life, that struggle with great statesmen.
Delio. In such a deformed silence witches whisper their charms.
Card. Doth she make religion her riding-hood 60 To keep her from the sun and tempest?
Ferd. That, that damns her. Methinks her fault and beauty, Blended together, show like leprosy, The whiter the fouler. I make it a question Whether her beggarly brats were ever christ’ned. 65
Card. I will instantly solicit the state of Ancona To have them banish’d.
Ferd. You are for Loretto: I shall not be at your ceremony, fare you well— Write to the Duke of Malfi, my young nephew, She had by her first husband, and acquaint him 70 With ’s mother’s honesty.
Bos. I will.
Ferd. Antonio! A slave that only smell’d of ink and counters, And nev’r in ’s life look’d like a gentleman, But in the audit-time.—Go, go presently, Draw me out an hundred and fifty of our horse, 75 And meet me at the foot-bridge. Exeunt.
Act III, Scene IV
[Enter] Two Pilgrims to the Shrine of our Lady of Loretto.
1 Pil. I have not seen a goodlier shrine than this; Yet I have visited many.
2 Pil. The Cardinal of Arragon Is this day to resign his cardinal’s hat; His sister duchess likewise is arriv’d To pay her vow of pilgrimage. I expect 5 A noble ceremony.
1 Pil. No question.—They come. [Here the ceremony of the Cardinal’s instalment in the habit of a soldier performed in delivering up his cross, hat, robes and ring at the shrine, and investing him with sword, helmet, shield, and spurs. Then ANTONIO, the DUCHESS and their children, having presented themselves at the shrine, are, by a form of banishment in dumb-show expressed towards them by the CARDINAL and the state of Ancona, banished: during all which ceremony, this ditty is sung, to very solemn music, by divers church-men; and then exeunt [all except the Two Pilgrims].
Arms and honours deck thy story,[3739] To thy fame’s eternal glory! Adverse fortune ever fly thee; No disastrous fate come nigh thee! 10 I alone will sing thy praises, Whom to honour virtue raises, And thy study, that divine is, Bent to martial discipline is, Lay aside all those robes lie by thee; 15 Crown thy arts with arms, they ’ll beautify thee.
O worthy of worthiest name, adorn’d in this manner, Lead bravely thy forces on under war’s warlike banner! O, mayst thou prove fortunate in all martial courses! Guide thou still by skill in arts and forces! 20 Victory attend thee nigh, whilst fame sings loud thy powers; Triumphant conquest crown thy head, and blessings pour down showers!
1 Pil. Here’s a strange turn of state! who would have thought So great a lady would have match’d herself Unto so mean a person? Yet the cardinal 25 Bears himself much too cruel.
2 Pil. They are banish’d.
1 Pil. But I would ask what power hath this state Of Ancona to determine of a free prince?
2 Pil. They are a free state, sir, and her brother show’d How that the Pope, fore-bearing of her looseness, 30 Hath seiz’d into th’ protection of the church The dukedom which she held as dowager.
1 Pil. But by what justice?
2 Pil. Sure, I think by none, Only her brother’s instigation.
1 Pil. What was it with such violence he took 35 Off from her finger?
2 Pil. ’T was her wedding-ring; Which he vow’d shortly he would sacrifice To his revenge.
1 Pil. Alas, Antonio! If that a man be thrust into a well, 39 No matter who sets hand to ’t, his own weight Will bring him sooner to th’ bottom. Come, let ’s hence. Fortune makes this conclusion general, All things do help th’ unhappy man to fall. Exeunt.
Act III, Scene V — [3740]
[Enter] DUCHESS, ANTONIO, Children, CARIOLA, and Servants.
Duch. Banish’d Ancona!
Ant. Yes, you see what power Lightens in great men’s breath.
Duch. Is all our train Shrunk to this poor remainder?
Ant. These poor men, Which have got little in your service, vow To take your fortune: but your wiser bunttings,[3741] 5 Now they are fledg’d, are gone.
Duch. They have done wisely. This puts me in mind of death: physicians thus, With their hands full of money, use to give o’er Their patients.
Ant. Right the fashion of the world: 9 From decay’d fortunes every flatterer shrinks; Men cease to build where the foundation sinks.
Duch. I had a very strange dream to-night.
Ant. What was ’t?
Duch. Methought I wore my coronet of state, And on a sudden all the diamonds Were chang’d to pearls.
Ant. My interpretation 15 Is, you ’ll weep shortly; for to me the pearls Do signify your tears.
Duch. The birds, that live i’ th’ field On the wild benefit of nature, live Happier than we: for they may choose their mates, And carol their sweet pleasures to the spring. 20
[Enter BOSOLA with a letter.]
Bos. You are happily o’erta’en.
Duch. From my brother?
Bos. Yes, from the Lord Ferdinand your brother All love and safety.
Duch. Thou dost blanch mischief, Would’st make it white. See, see, like to calm weather At sea before a tempest, false hearts speak fair 25 To those they intend most mischief. [Reads.] “Send Antonio to me; I want his head in a business.” A politic equivocation! He doth not want your counsel, but your head; That is, he cannot sleep till you be dead. 30 And here ’s another pitfall that ’s strew’d o’er With roses: mark it, ’t is a cunning one: [Reads.] “I stand engaged for your husband for several debts at Naples: let not that trouble him; I had rather have his heart than his money.”— And I believe so too.
Bos. What do you believe? 36
Duch. That he so much distrusts my husband’s love, He will by no means believe his heart is with him Until he see it: the devil is not cunning enough To circumvent us in riddles. 40
Bos. Will you reject that noble and free league Of amity and love which I present you?
Duch. Their league is like that of some politic kings, Only to make themselves of strength and power To be our after-ruin: tell them so. 45
Bos. And what from you?
Ant. Thus tell him; I will not come.
Bos. And what of this?
Ant. My brothers have dispers’d Bloodhounds abroad; which till I hear are muzzl’d, No truce, though hatch’d with ne’er such politic skill, Is safe, that hangs upon our enemies’ will. 50 I ’ll not come at them.
Bos. This proclaims your breeding. Every small thing draws a base mind to fear As the adamant draws iron. Fare you well, sir; You shall shortly hear from ’s. Exit.
Duch. I suspect some ambush; Therefore by all my love I do conjure you 55 To take your eldest son, and fly towards Milan, Let us not venture all this poor remainder In one unlucky bottom.
Ant. You counsel safely. Best of my life, farewell. Since we must part, Heaven hath a hand in ’t; but no otherwise 60 Than as some curious artist takes in sunder A clock or watch, when it is out of frame, To bring ’t in better order.
Duch. I know not which is best, To see you dead, or part with you. Farewell, boy: 65 Thou art happy that thou hast not understanding To know thy misery; for all our wit And reading brings us to a truer sense Of sorrow.—In the eternal church, sir, I do hope we shall not part thus.
Ant. O, be of comfort! 70 Make patience a noble fortitude, And think not how unkindly we are us’d: Man, like to cassia, is prov’d best, being bruis’d.
Duch. Must I, like to a slave-born Russian, Account it praise to suffer tyranny? 75 And yet, O heaven, thy heavy hand is in ’t! I have seen my little boy oft scourge his top, And compar’d myself to ’t: naught made me e’er Go right but heaven’s scourge-stick.
Ant. Do not weep: Heaven fashion’d us of nothing; and we strive To bring ourselves to nothing.—Farewell, Cariola, 81 And thy sweet armful.—If I do never see thee more, Be a good mother to your little ones, And save them from the tiger: fare you well.
Duch. Let me look upon you once more, for that speech 85 Came from a dying father. Your kiss is colder Than that I have seen an holy anchorite Give to a dead man’s skull.
Ant. My heart is turn’d to a heavy lump of lead, With which I sound my danger: fare you well. Exeunt [ANTONIO and his son].
Duch. My laurel is all withered. 91
Cari. Look, madam, what a troop of armed men Make toward us!
Re-enter BOSOLA [visarded,] with a Guard.
Duch. O, they are very welcome: When Fortune’s wheel is over-charg’d with princes, The weight makes it move swift: I would have my ruin 95 Be sudden.—I am your adventure, am I not?
Bos. You are: you must see your husband no more.
Duch. What devil art thou that counterfeit’st heaven’s thunder?
Bos. Is that terrible? I would have you tell me whether Is that note worse that frights the silly birds 100 Out of the corn, or that which doth allure them To the nets? You have heark’ned to the last too much.
Duch. O misery! like to a rusty o’ercharg’d cannon, Shall I never fly in pieces? Come, to what prison?
Bos. To none.
Duch. Whither, then?
Bos. To your palace.
Duch. I have heard 105 That Charon’s boat serves to convey all o’er The dismal lake, but brings none back again.
Bos. Your brothers mean you safety and pity.
Duch. Pity! With such a pity men preserve alive Pheasants and quails, when they are not fat enough 110 To be eaten.
Bos. These are your children?
Duch. Yes.
Bos. Can they prattle?
Duch. No: But I intend, since they were born accurs’d, Curses shall be their first language.
Bos. Fie, madam! Forget this base, low fellow——
Duch. Were I a man, 115 I ’d beat that counterfeit face[3742] into thy other.
Bos. One of no birth.
Duch. Say that he was born mean, Man is most happy when ’s own actions Be arguments and examples of his virtue.
Bos. A barren, beggarly virtue. 120
Duch. I prithee, who is greatest? Can you tell? Sad tales befit my woe: I ’ll tell you one. A salmon, as she swam unto the sea, Met with a dog-fish, who encounters her With this rough language; ’Why art thou so bold 125 To mix thyself with our high state of floods, Being no eminent courtier, but one That for the calmest and fresh time o’ th’ year Dost live in shallow rivers, rank’st thyself With silly smelts and shrimps? And darest thou 130 Pass by our dog-ship without reverence?’ ’O,’ quoth the salmon, ’sister, be at peace: Thank Jupiter we both have pass’d the net! Our value never can be truly known, Till in the fisher’s basket we be shown: 135 I’ th’ market then my price may be the higher, Even when I am nearest to the cook and fire.’ So to great men the moral may be stretched; Men oft are valu’d high, when they ’re most wretched.— But come, whither you please. I am arm’d ’gainst misery; 140 Bent to all sways of the oppressor’s will. There ’s no deep valley but near some great hill. Exeunt.
Act IV, Scene I — [3743]
[Enter] FERDINAND and BOSOLA.
Ferd. How doth our sister duchess bear herself In her imprisonment?
Bos. Nobly: I ’ll describe her. She ’s sad as one long us’d to ’t, and she seems Rather to welcome the end of misery Than shun it; a behaviour so noble 5 As gives a majesty to adversity: You may discern the shape of loveliness More perfect in her tears than in her smiles: She will muse four hours together; and her silence, Methinks, expresseth more than if she spake. 10
Ferd. Her melancholy seems to be fortified With a strange disdain.
Bos. ’Ti s so; and this restraint, Like English mastives that grow fierce with tying, Makes her too passionately apprehend Those pleasures she is kept from.
Ferd. Curse upon her! 15 I will no longer study in the book Of another’s heart. Inform her what I told you. Exit.
[Enter DUCHESS and Attendants.]
Bos. All comfort to your grace!
Duch. I will have none. Pray thee, why dost thou wrap thy poison’d pills In gold and sugar? 20
Bos. Your elder brother, the Lord Ferdinand, Is come to visit you, and sends you word, ’Cause once he rashly made a solemn vow Never to see you more, he comes i’ th’ night; And prays you gently neither torch nor taper 25 Shine in your chamber. He will kiss your hand, And reconcile himself; but for his vow He dares not see you.
Duch. At his pleasure.— Take hence the lights.—He’s come. [Exeunt Attendants with lights.] [Enter FERDINAND.]
Ferd. Where are you?
Duch. Here, sir.
Ferd. This darkness suits you well.
Duch. I would ask you pardon. 30
Ferd. You have it; For I account it the honorabl’st revenge, Where I may kill, to pardon.—Where are your cubs?
Duch. Whom?
Ferd. Call them your children; For though our national law distinguish bastards 35 From true legitimate issue, compassionate nature Makes them all equal.
Duch. Do you visit me for this? You violate a sacrament o’ th’ church Shall make you howl in hell for ’t.
Ferd. It had been well 39 Could you have liv’d thus always; for, indeed, You were too much i’ th’ light:—but no more; I come to seal my peace with you. Here ’s a hand Gives her a dead man’s hand. To which you have vow’d much love; the ring upon ’t You gave.
Duch. I affectionately kiss it.
Ferd. Pray, do, and bury the print of it in your heart. 45 I will leave this ring with you for a love-token; And the hand as sure as the ring; and do not doubt But you shall have the heart too. When you need a friend, Send it to him that ow’d it; you shall see Whether he can aid you.
Duch. You are very cold: 50 I fear you are not well after your travel.— Ha! lights!——O, horrible!
Ferd. Let her have lights enough. Exit.
Duch. What witchcraft doth he practise, that he hath left A dead man’s hand here? Here is discovered, behind a traverse,[3744] _the artificial figures of_ ANTONIO and his children, _appearing as if they were dead_.
Bos. Look you, here ’s the piece from which ’t was ta’en. 55 He doth present you this sad spectacle, That, now you know directly they are dead, Hereafter you may wisely cease to grieve For that which cannot be recovered.
Duch. There is not between heaven and earth one wish 60 I stay for after this. It wastes me more Than were ’t my picture, fashion’d out of wax, Stuck with a magical needle, and then buried In some foul dung hill; and yon ’s an excellent property For a tyrant, which I would account mercy.
Bos. What ’s that? 65
Duch. If they would bind me to that lifeless trunk, And let me freeze to death.
Bos. Come, you must live.
Duch. That ’s the greatest torture souls feel in hell, In hell, that they must live, and cannot die. Portia,[3745] I ’ll new kindle thy coals again, 70 And revive the rare and almost dead example Of a loving wife.
Bos. O, fie! despair? Remember You are a Christian.
Duch. The church enjoins fasting: I ’ll starve myself to death.
Bos. Leave this vain sorrow. Things being at the worst begin to mend: the bee 75 When he hath shot his sting into your hand, May then play with your eye-lid.
Duch. Good comfortable fellow. Persuade a wretch that’s broke upon the wheel To have all his bones new set; entreat him live To be executed again. Who must despatch me? I account this world a tedious theatre, 81 For I do play a part in ’t ’gainst my will.
Bos. Come, be of comfort; I will save your life.
Duch. Indeed, I have not leisure to tend so small a business.
Bos. Now, by my life, I pity you.
Duch. Thou art a fool, then, 85 To waste thy pity on a thing so wretched As cannot pity itself. I am full of daggers. Puff, let me blow these vipers from me. [Enter Servant.] What are you?
Serv. One that wishes you long life.
Duch. I would thou wert hang’d for the horrible curse 90 Thou hast given me: I shall shortly grow one Of the miracles of pity. I ’ll go pray;— [Exit Serv.] No, I ’ll go curse.
Bos. O, fie!
Duch. I could curse the stars—
Bos. O, fearful!
Duch. And those three smiling seasons of the year Into a Russian winter; nay, the world 95 To its first chaos.
Bos. Look you, the stars shine still.
Duch. O, but you must Remember, my curse hath a great way to go.— Plagues, that make lanes through largest families, Consume them!—
Bos. Fie, lady!
Duch. Let them, like tyrants, 100 Never be remembered but for the ill they have done; Let all the zealous prayers of mortified Churchmen forget them!—
Bos. O, uncharitable!
Duch. Let heaven a little while cease crowning martyrs, To punish them!— 105 Go, howl them this, and say, I long to bleed: It is some mercy when men kill with speed. Exit.
[Re-enter FERDINAND.]
Ferd. Excellent, as I would wish; she’s plagu’d in art.[3746] These presentations are but fram’d in wax By the curious master in that quality,[3747] 110 Vincentio Lauriola, and she takes them For true substantial bodies.
Bos. Why do you do this?
Ferd. To bring her to despair.
Bos. Faith, end here, And go no farther in your cruelty: Send her a penitential garment to put on 115 Next to her delicate skin, and furnish her With beads and prayer-books.
Ferd. Damn her! that body of hers, While that my blood ran pure in ’t, was more worth Than that which thou wouldst comfort, call’d a soul. 119 I will send her masques of common courtesans, Have her meat serv’d up by bawds and ruffians, And, ’cause she ’ll needs be mad, I am resolv’d To move forth the common hospital All the mad-folk, and place them near her lodging; There let them practise together, sing and dance, 125 And act their gambols to the full o’ th’ moon: If she can sleep the better for it, let her. Your work is almost ended.
Bos. Must I see her again?
Ferd. Yes.
Bos. Never.
Ferd. You must.
Bos. Never in mine own shape; That’s forfeited by my intelligence[3748] 130 And this last cruel lie: when you send me next, The business shall be comfort.
Ferd. Very likely, Thy pity is nothing of kin to thee. Antonio Lurks about Milan: thou shalt shortly thither, To feed a fire as great as my revenge, 135 Which nev’r will slack till it hath spent his fuel: Intemperate agues make physicians cruel. Exeunt.
[SCENE II.][3749]
Enter DUCHESS and CARIOLA.
Duch. What hideous noise was that?
Cari. ’T is the wild consort[3750] Of madmen, lady, which your tyrant brother Hath plac’d about your lodging. This tyranny, I think, was never practis’d till this hour.
Duch. Indeed, I thank him. Nothing but noise and folly 5 Can keep me in my right wits; whereas reason And silence make me stark mad. Sit down; Discourse to me some dismal tragedy.
Cari. O, ’t will increase your melancholy!
Duch. Thou art deceiv’d: To hear of greater grief would lessen mine. 10 This is a prison?
Cari. Yes, but you shall live To shake this durance off.
Duch. Thou art a fool: The robin-red-breast and the nightingale Never live long in cages.
Cari. Pray, dry your eyes. What think you of, madam?
Duch. Of nothing; 15 When I muse thus, I sleep.
Cari. Like a madman, with your eyes open?
Duch. Dost thou think we shall know one another In th’ other world?
Cari. Yes, out of question.
Duch. O, that it were possible we might 20 But hold some two days’ conference with the dead! From them I should learn somewhat, I am sure, I never shall know here. I ’ll tell thee a miracle: I am not mad yet, to my cause of sorrow: Th’ heaven o’er my head seems made of molten brass, 25 The earth of flaming sulphur, yet I am not mad. I am acquainted with sad misery As the tann’d galley-slave is with his oar; Necessity makes me suffer constantly, And custom makes it easy. Who do I look like now? 30
Cari. Like to your picture in the gallery, A deal of life in show, but none in practice; Or rather like some reverend monument Whose ruins are even pitied.
Duch. Very proper; And Fortune seems only to have her eye-sight To behold my tragedy.—How now! 36 What noise is that?
[Enter Servant.]
Serv. I am come to tell you Your brother hath intended you some sport. A great physician, when the Pope was sick Of a deep melancholy, presented him 40 With several sorts[3751] of madmen, which wild object Being full of change and sport, forc’d him to laugh, And so th’ imposthume[3752] broke: the self-same cure The duke intends on you.
Duch. Let them come in.
Serv. There ’s a mad lawyer; and a secular priest; 45 A doctor that hath forfeited his wits By jealousy; an astrologian That in his works said such a day o’ th’ month Should be the day of doom, and, failing of ’t; Ran mad; an English tailor craz’d i’ th’ brain With the study of new fashions; a gentleman-usher 51 Quite beside himself with care to keep in mind The number of his lady’s salutations, Or ’How do you,’ she employ’d him in each morning; A farmer, too, an excellent knave in grain,[3753] 55 Mad ’cause he was hind’red transportation:[3754] And let one broker that ’s mad loose to these, You ’d think the devil were among them.
Duch. Sit, Cariola.—Let them loose when you please, For I am chain’d to endure all your tyranny. 60
[Enter Madman.]
Here by a Madman this song is sung to a dismal kind of music.
O, let us howl some heavy note, Some deadly dogged howl, Bounding as from the threat’ning throat Of beasts and fatal fowl! As ravens, screech-owls, bulls, and bears, 65 We ’ll bell, and bawl our parts, Till irksome noise have cloy’d your ears And corrosiv’d your hearts. At last, when as our choir wants breath, Our bodies being blest, 70 We ’ll sing, like swans, to welcome death, And die in love and rest.
1 Madman. Doom’s-day not come yet! I ’ll draw it nearer by a perspective,[3755] or make a (74) glass that shall set all the world on fire upon an instant. I cannot sleep; my pillow is stuft with a litter of porcupines.
2 Madman. Hell is a mere glass-house, where the devils are continually blowing up women’s souls on hollow irons, and the fire never goes (80) out.
3 Madman. I will lie with every woman in my parish the tenth night. I will tithe them over like hay-cocks. 84
4 Madman. Shall my ’pothecary out-go me, because I am a cuckold? I have found out his roguery: he makes alum of his wife’s urine, and sells it to Puritans that have sore throats with over-straining.
1 Madman. I have skill in heraldry. 90
2 Madman. Hast?
1 Madman. You do give for your crest a woodcock’s head with the brains pickt out on ’t; you are a very ancient gentleman. 94
3 Madman. Greek is turn’d Turk: we are only to be sav’d by the Helvetian translation.[3756]
1 Madman. Come on, sir, I will lay the law to you.
2 Madman. O, rather lay a corrosive: the law will eat to the bone. 100
3 Madman. He that drinks but to satisfy nature is damn’d.
4 Madman. If I had my glass here, I would show a sight should make all the women here call me mad doctor. 105
1 Madman. What ’s he? A rope-maker?
2 Madman. No, no, no; a snuffling knave that while he shows the tombs, will have his hand in a wench’s placket.[3757] 109
3 Madman. Woe to the caroche[3758] that brought home my wife from the masque at three o’clock in the morning! It had a large feather-bed in it.
4 Madman. I have pared the devil’s nails forty times, roasted them in raven’s eggs, (115) and cur’d agues with them.
3 Madman. Get me three hundred milch-bats, to make possets[3759] to procure sleep.
4 Madman. All the college may throw their caps at me: I have made a soap-boiler costive; (120) it was my masterpiece.
Here the dance, consisting of Eight Madmen, with music answerable thereunto; after which, BOSOLA, like an old man, enters.
Duch. Is he mad too?
Serv. Pray, question him. I ’ll leave you. [Exeunt Servant and Madmen.]
Bos. I am come to make thy tomb.
Duch. Ha! my tomb! Thou speak’st as if I lay upon my death-bed, Gasping for breath. Dost thou perceive me sick? 125
Bos. Yes, and the more dangerously, since thy sickness is insensible.
Duch. Thou art not mad, sure: dost know me?
Bos. Yes.
Duch. Who am I?
Bos. Thou art a box of worm-seed, at best but a salvatory[3760] of green mummy.[3761] What ’s this flesh? A little crudded[3762] milk, fantastical (131) puff-paste. Our bodies are weaker than those paper-prisons boys use to keep flies in; more contemptible, since ours is to preserve earth-worms. Didst thou ever see a lark in 135 a cage? Such is the soul in the body: this world is like her little turf of grass, and the heaven o’er our heads, like her looking-glass, only gives us a miserable knowledge of the small compass of our prison. 140
Duch. Am I not thy duchess?
Bos. Thou art some great woman, sure, for riot begins to sit on thy forehead (clad in gray hairs) twenty years sooner than on a merry milk-maid’s. Thou sleep’st worse than if a (145) mouse should be forc’d to take up her lodging in a cat’s ear: a little infant that breeds its teeth, should it lie with thee, would cry out, as if thou wert the more unquiet bedfellow.
Duch. I am Duchess of Malfi still. 150
Bos. That makes thy sleep so broken: Glories, like glow-worms, afar off shine bright, But, look’d to near, have neither heat nor light.
Duch. Thou art very plain.
Bos. My trade is to flatter the dead, not (155) the living; I am a tomb-maker.
Duch. And thou com’st to make my tomb?
Bos. Yes.
Duch. Let me be a little merry:—of what stuff wilt thou make it? 160
Bos. Nay, resolve me first, of what fashion?
Duch. Why, do we grow fantastical on our deathbed? Do we affect fashion in the grave?
Bos. Most ambitiously. Princes’ images on their tombs do not lie, as they were wont, (165) seeming to pray up to heaven; but with their hands under their cheeks, as if they died of the tooth-ache. They are not carved with their eyes fix’d upon the stars, but as their minds were wholly bent upon the world, the self-same (170) way they seem to turn their faces.[3763]
Duch. Let me know fully therefore the effect Of this thy dismal preparation, This talk fit for a charnel.
Bos. Now I shall:— [Enter Executioners, with] a coffin, cords, and a bell. Here is a present from your princely brothers; And may it arrive welcome, for it brings 176 Last benefit, last sorrow.
Duch. Let me see it: I have so much obedience in my blood, I wish it in their veins to do them good.
Bos. This is your last presence-chamber. 180
Cari. O my sweet lady!
Duch. Peace; it affrights not me.
Bos. I am the common bellman That usually is sent to condemn’d persons The night before they suffer.
Duch. Even now thou said’st Thou wast a tomb-maker.
Bos. ’T was to bring you 185 By degrees to mortification. Listen. Hark, now everything is still, The screech-owl and the whistler shrill Call upon our dame aloud, And bid her quickly don her shroud! 190 Much you had of land and rent; Your length in clay ’s now competent: A long war disturb’d your mind; Here your perfect peace is sign’d. Of what is ’t fools make such vain keeping? 195 Sin their conception, their birth weeping, Their life a general mist of error, Their death a hideous storm of terror. Strew your hair with powders sweet, Don clean linen, bathe your feet, 200 And (the foul fiend more to check) A crucifix let bless your neck. ’T is now full tide ’tween night and day, End your groan, and come away.
Cari. Hence, villains, tyrants, murderers! Alas! 205 What will you do with my lady?—Call for help!
Duch. To whom? To our next neighbours? They are mad-folks.
Bos. Remove that noise.
Duch. Farewell, Cariola. In my last will I have not much to give: A many hungry guests have fed upon me; 210 Thine will be a poor reversion.
Cari. I will die with her.
Duch. I pray thee, look thou giv’st my little boy Some syrup for his cold, and let the girl Say her prayers ere she sleep. [CARIOLA is forced out by the Executioners.] Now what you please: What death?
Bos. Strangling; here are your executioners.
Duch. I forgive them: 216 The apoplexy, catarrh, or cough o’ th’ lungs, Would do as much as they do.
Bos. Doth not death fright you?
Duch. Who would be afraid on ’t, Knowing to meet such excellent company 220 In th’ other world?
Bos. Yet, methinks, The manner of your death should much afflict you: This cord should terrify you.
Duch. Not a whit: What would it pleasure me to have my throat cut 225 With diamonds? or to be smothered With cassia? or to be shot to death with pearls? I know death hath ten thousand several doors For men to take their exits; and ’t is found They go on such strange geometrical hinges, 230 You may open them both ways: any way, for heaven-sake, So I were out of your whispering. Tell my brothers That I perceive death, now I am well awake, Best gift is they can give or I can take. I would fain put off my last woman’s-fault, 235 I ’d not be tedious to you.
1 Execut. We are ready.
Duch. Dispose my breath how please you; but my body Bestow upon my women, will you?
1 Execut. Yes.
Duch. Pull, and pull strongly, for your able strength Must pull down heaven upon me:— 240 Yet stay; heaven-gates are not so highly arch’d As princes’ palaces; they that enter there Must go upon their knees [kneels].—Come, violent death, Serve for mandragora to make me sleep!— Go tell my brothers, when I am laid out, 245 They then may feed in quiet. They strangle her.
Bos. Where’s the waiting-woman? Fetch her: some other strangle the children. [Enter CARIOLA.] Look you, there sleeps your mistress.
Cari. O, you are damn’d Perpetually for this! My turn is next; 250 Is ’t not so ordered?
Bos. Yes, and I am glad You are so well prepar’d for ’t.
Cari. You are deceiv’d, sir, I am not prepar’d for ’t, I will not die; I will first come to my answer,[3764] and know How I have offended.
Bos. Come, despatch her.— 255 You kept her counsel; now you shall keep ours.
Cari. I will not die, I must not; I am contracted To a young gentleman.
1 Execut. Here’s your wedding-ring.
Cari. Let me but speak with the duke. I ’ll discover Treason to his person.
Bos. Delays:—throttle her. 260
1 Execut. She bites and scratches.
Cari. If you kill me now, I am damn’d; I have not been at confession This two years.
Bos. [To Executioners.] When![3765]
Cari. I am quick with child.
Bos. Why, then, Your credit ’s saved. [Executioners strangle CARIOLA.] Bear her into th’ next room; 265 Let these lie still. [Exeunt Executioners with body of CARIOLA.]
[Enter FERDINAND.]
Ferd. Is she dead?
Bos. She is what You ’d have her. But here begin your pity: Shows the Children strangled. Alas, how have these offended?
Ferd. The death Of young wolves is never to be pitied.
Bos. Fix your eye here.
Ferd. Constantly.
Bos. Do you not weep? 270 Other sins only speak; murder shrieks out. The element of water moistens the earth, But blood flies upwards and bedews the heavens.
Ferd. Cover her face; mine eyes dazzle: she died young.
Bos. I think not so; her infelicity 275 Seem’d to have years too many.
Ferd. She and I were twins; And should I die this instant, I had liv’d Her time to a minute.
Bos. It seems she was born first: You have bloodily approv’d the ancient truth, That kindred commonly do worse agree 281 Than remote strangers.
Ferd. Let me see her face Again. Why didst thou not pity her? What An excellent honest man mightst thou have been, If thou hadst borne her to some sanctuary! 285 Or, bold in a good cause,—oppos’d thyself, With thy advanced sword above thy head, Between her innocence and my revenge! I bade thee, when I was distracted of my wits, Go kill my dearest friend, and thou hast done ’t. For let me but examine well the cause: 291 What was the meanness of her match to me? Only I must confess I had a hope, Had she continu’d widow, to have gain’d An infinite mass of treasure by her death: 295 And that was the main cause,—her marriage, That drew a stream of gall quite through my heart. For thee, as we observe in tragedies That a good actor many times is curs’d For playing a villain’s part, I hate thee for ’t. And, for my sake, say, thou hast done much ill well. 301
Bos. Let me quicken your memory, for I perceive You are falling into ingratitude: I challenge The reward due to my service.
Ferd. I’ll tell thee What I’ll give thee.
Bos. Do.
Ferd. I’ll give thee a pardon 305 For this murder.
Bos. Ha!
Ferd. Yes, and ’t is The largest bounty I can study to do thee. By what authority didst thou execute This bloody sentence?
Bos. By yours.
Ferd. Mine! Was I her judge? 310 Did any ceremonial form of law Doom her to not-being? Did a complete jury Deliver her conviction up i’ th’ court? Where shalt thou find this judgment register’d, Unless in hell? See, like a bloody fool, 315 Thou ’st forfeited thy life, and thou shalt die for ’t.
Bos. The office of justice is perverted quite When one thief hangs another. Who shall dare To reveal this?
Ferd. O, I’ll tell thee; The wolf shall find her grave, and scrape it up, Not to devour the corpse, but to discover 321 The horrid murder.
Bos. You, not I, shall quake for ’t.
Ferd. Leave me.
Bos. I will first receive my pension.
Ferd. You are a villain.
Bos. When your ingratitude Is judge, I am so.
Ferd. O horror, 325 That not the fear of him which binds the devils Can prescribe man obedience!—Never look upon me more.
Bos. Why, fare thee well. Your brother and yourself are worthy men! You have a pair of hearts are hollow graves, 330 Rotten, and rotting others; and your vengeance, Like two chain’d-bullets, still goes arm in arm: You may be brothers; for treason, like the plague, Doth take much in a blood. I stand like one That long hath ta’en a sweet and golden dream: 335 I am angry with myself now, that I wake.
Ferd. Get thee into some unknown part o’ the world, That I may never see thee.
Bos. Let me know Wherefore I should be thus neglected. Sir, I serv’d your tyranny, and rather strove 340 To satisfy yourself than all the world: And though I loath’d the evil, yet I lov’d You that did counsel it; and rather sought To appear a true servant than an honest man.
Ferd. I’ll go hunt the badger by owl-light. 345 ’T is a deed of darkness. Exit.
Bos. He’s much distracted. Off, my painted honour! While with vain hopes our faculties we tire, We seem to sweat in ice and freeze in fire. What would I do, were this to do again? 350 I would not change my peace of conscience For all the wealth of Europe.—She stirs; here’s life:— Return, fair soul, from darkness, and lead mine Out of this sensible hell!—she ’s warm, she breathes:— Upon thy pale lips I will melt my heart, 355 To store them with fresh colour.—Who’s there? Some cordial drink!—Alas! I dare not call: So pity would destroy pity.—Her eye opes, And heaven in it seems to ope, that late was shut, To take me up to mercy. 360
Duch. Antonio!
Bos. Yes, madam, he is living; The dead bodies you saw were but feign’d statues. He’s reconcil’d to your brothers; the Pope hath wrought The atonement.
Duch. Mercy! Dies.
Bos. O, she’s gone again! there the cords of life broke. 365 O sacred innocence, that sweetly sleeps On turtles’ feathers, whilst a guilty conscience Is a black register wherein is writ All our good deeds and bad, a perspective That shows us hell! That we cannot be suffer’d To do good when we have a mind to it! 371 This is manly sorrow; These tears, I am very certain, never grew In my mother’s milk. My estate is sunk Below the degree of fear: where were 375 These penitent fountains while she was living? O, they were frozen up! Here is a sight As direful to my soul as is the sword Unto a wretch hath slain his father. Come, I ’ll bear thee hence, 380 And execute thy last will; that’s deliver Thy body to the reverend dispose Of some good women: that the cruel tyrant Shall not deny me. Then I ’ll post to Milan, Where somewhat I will speedily enact 385 Worth my dejection. Exit [with the body].
Act V, Scene I — [3766]
[Enter] ANTONIO and DELIO.
Ant. What think you of my hope of reconcilement To the Arragonian brethren?
Delio. I misdoubt it; For though they have sent their letters of safe-conduct For your repair to Milan, they appear But nets to entrap you. The Marquis of Pescara, 5 Under whom you hold certain land in cheat,[3767] Much ’gainst his noble nature hath been mov’d To seize those lands; and some of his dependants Are at this instant making it their suit To be invested in your revenues. 10 I cannot think they mean well to your life That do deprive you of your means of life, Your living.
Ant. You are still an heretic[3768] To any safety I can shape myself.
Delio. Here comes the marquis: I will make myself 15 Petitioner for some part of your land, To know whither it is flying.
Ant. I pray, do. [Withdraws.]
[Enter PESCARA.]
Delio. Sir, I have a suit to you.
Pes. To me?
Delio. An easy one: There is the Citadel of Saint Bennet, With some demesnes, of late in the possession Of Antonio Bologna,—please you bestow them on me. 21
Pes. You are my friend; but this is such a suit, Nor fit for me to give, nor you to take.
Delio. No, sir?
Pes. I will give you ample reason for ’t Soon in private:—here’s the cardinal’s mistress. 25
[Enter JULIA.]
Julia. My lord, I am grown your poor petitioner, And should be an ill beggar, had I not A great man’s letter here, the cardinal’s. To court you in my favour. [Gives a letter.]
Pes. He entreats for you The Citadel of Saint Bennet, that belong’d 30 To the banish’d Bologna.
Julia. Yes.
Pes. I could not have thought of a friend I could rather Pleasure with it: ’t is yours.
Julia. Sir, I thank you; And he shall know how doubly I am engag’d Both in your gift, and speediness of giving, 35 Which makes your grant the greater. Exit.
Ant. How they fortify Themselves with my ruin!
Delio. Sir, I am Little bound to you.
Pes. Why?
Delio. Because you deni’d this suit to me, and gave ’t To such a creature.
Pes. Do you know what it was? It was Antonio’s land; not forfeited 41 By course of law, but ravish’d from his throat By the cardinal’s entreaty. It were not fit I should bestow so main a piece of wrong Upon my friend; ’t is a gratification 45 Only due to a strumpet, for it is injustice. Shall I sprinkle the pure blood of innocents To make those followers I call my friends Look ruddier upon me? I am glad This land, ta’en from the owner by such wrong, Returns again unto so foul an use 51 As salary for his lust. Learn, good Delio, To ask noble things of me, and you shall find I ’ll be a noble giver.
Delio. You instruct me well.
Ant. [Aside.] Why, here ’s a man now would fright impudence 55 From sauciest beggars.
Pes. Prince Ferdinand’s come to Milan, Sick, as they give out, of an apoplexy; But some say ’t is a frenzy: I am going To visit him. Exit.
Ant. ’T is a noble old fellow.
Delio. What course do you mean to take, Antonio? 60
Ant. This night I mean to venture all my fortune, Which is no more than a poor ling’ring life, To the cardinal’s worst of malice. I have got Private access to his chamber; and intend To visit him about the mid of night, 65 As once his brother did our noble duchess. It may be that the sudden apprehension Of danger,—for I ’ll go in mine own shape,— When he shall see it fraight[3769] with love and duty, May draw the poison out of him, and work 70 A friendly reconcilement. If it fail, Yet it shall rid me of this infamous calling; For better fall once than be ever falling.
Delio. I ’ll second you in all danger; and, howe’er, My life keeps rank with yours. 75
Ant. You are still my lov’d and best friend. Exeunt.
[SCENE II.][3770]
[Enter] PESCARA and DOCTOR.
Pes. Now, doctor, may I visit your patient?
Doc. If ’t please your lordship; but he’s instantly To take the air here in the gallery By my direction.
Pes. Pray thee, what’s his disease?
Doc. A very pestilent disease, my lord, 5 They call lycanthropia.
Pes. What ’s that? I need a dictionary to ’t.
Doc. I ’ll tell you. In those that are possess’d with ’t there o’erflows Such melancholy humour they imagine Themselves to be transformed into wolves; 10 Steal forth to church-yards in the dead of night, And dig dead bodies up: as two nights since One met the duke ’bout midnight in a lane Behind Saint Mark’s church, with the leg of a man Upon his shoulder; and he howl’d fearfully; 15 Said he was a wolf, only the difference Was, a wolf’s skin was hairy on the outside, His on the inside; bade them take their swords, Rip up his flesh, and try. Straight I was sent for. And, having minister’d to him, found his grace Very well recovered. 21
Pes. I am glad on ’t.
Doc. Yet not without some fear Of a relapse. If he grow to his fit again, I ’ll go a nearer way to work with him Than ever Paracelsus dream’d of; if 25 They ’ll give me leave, I ’ll buffet his madness out of him. Stand aside; he comes.
[Enter FERDINAND, CARDINAL, MALATESTI, and BOSOLA.]
Ferd. Leave me.
Mal. Why doth your lordship love this solitariness?
Ferd. Eagles commonly fly alone: they are (30) crows, daws, and starlings that flock together. Look, what ’s that follows me?
Mal. Nothing, my lord.
Ferd. Yes.
Mal. ’T is your shadow. 35
Ferd. Stay it; let it not haunt me.
Mal. Impossible, if you move, and the sun shine.
Ferd. I will throttle it. [Throws himself down on his shadow.]
Mal. O. my lord, you are angry with nothing.
Ferd. You are a fool: how is ’t possible I (40) should catch my shadow, unless I fall upon ’t? When I go to hell, I mean to carry a bribe; for, look you, good gifts evermore make way for the worst persons.
Pes. Rise, good my lord. 45
Ferd. I am studying the art of patience.
Pes. ’T is a noble Virtue.
Ferd. To drive six snails before me from this town to Moscow; neither use goad nor whip to them, but let them take their own time;—the (50) patient’st man i’ th’ world match me for an experiment:—an I ’ll crawl after like a sheep-biter.[3771]
Card. Force him up. [They raise him.]
Ferd. Use me well, you were best. What I (55) have done, I have done: I ’ll confess nothing.
Doc. Now let me come to him.—Are you mad, my lord? Are you out of your princely wits?
Ferd. What ’s he?
Pes. Your doctor.
Ferd. Let me have his beard saw’d off, and his eye-brows fil’d more civil. 60
Doc. I must do mad tricks with him, for that ’s the only way on ’t.—I have brought your grace a salamander’s skin to keep you from sun-burning.
Ferd. I have cruel sore eyes. 65
Doc. The white of a cockatrix’s[3772] egg is present remedy.
Ferd. Let it be a new-laid one, you were best. Hide me from him: physicians are like kings,— They brook no contradiction. 70
Doc. Now he begins to fear me: now let me alone with him.
Card. How now! put off your gown!
Doc. Let me have some forty urinals filled with rose-water: he and I ’ll go pelt one (75) another with them.—Now he begins to fear me.—Can you fetch a frisk,[3773] sir? Let him go, let him go, upon my peril: I find by his eye he stands in awe of me; I ’ll make him as tame as a dormouse. 80
Ferd. Can you fetch your frisks, sir!—I will stamp him into a cullis,[3774] flay off his skin to cover one of the anatomies[3775] this rogue hath set i’ th’ cold yonder in Barber-Chirurgeon’s-hall.—Hence, hence! you are all of you like 85 beasts for sacrifice. [Throws the DOCTOR down and beats him.] There ’s nothing left of you but tongue and belly, flattery and lechery. [Exit.]
Pes. Doctor, he did not fear you thoroughly.
Doc. True; I was somewhat too forward. 90
Bos. Mercy upon me, what a fatal judgment Hath fall’n upon this Ferdinand!
Pes. Knows your grace What accident hath brought unto the prince This strange distraction?
Card. [Aside.] I must feign somewhat.—Thus they say it grew. 95 You have heard it rumour’d, for these many years None of our family dies but there is seen The shape of an old woman, which is given By tradition to us to have been murder’d 99 By her nephews for her riches. Such a figure One night, as the prince sat up late at ’s book, Appear’d to him; when crying out for help, The gentleman of ’s chamber found his grace All on a cold sweat, alter’d much in face And language: since which apparition, 105 He hath grown worse and worse, and I much fear He cannot live.
Bos. Sir, I would speak with you.
Pes. We ’ll leave your grace, Wishing to the sick prince, our noble lord, All health of mind and body.
Card. You are most welcome. [Exeunt PESCARA, MALATESTI, and DOCTOR.] Are you come? so.—[Aside.] This fellow must not know 111 By any means I had intelligence In our duchess’ death; for, though I counsell’d it, The full of all th’ engagement seem’d to grow From Ferdinand.—Now, sir, how fares our sister? 115 I do not think but sorrow makes her look Like to an oft-dy’d garment: she shall now Take comfort from me. Why do you look so wildly? O, the fortune of your master here, the prince, Dejects you; but be you of happy comfort: 120 If you ’ll do one thing for me I ’ll entreat, Though he had a cold tomb-stone o’er his bones, I ’d make you what you would be.
Bos. Any thing; Give it me in a breath, and let me fly to ’t. They that think long small expedition win, 125 For musing much o’ th’ end cannot begin.
[Enter JULIA.]
Julia. Sir, will you come in to supper?
Card. I am busy; leave me.
Julia. [Aside.] What an excellent shape hath that fellow! Exit.
Card. ’T is thus. Antonio lurks here in Milan: Inquire him out, and kill him. While he lives, Our sister cannot marry; and I have thought Of an excellent match for her. Do this, and style me 132 Thy advancement.
Bos. But by what means shall I find him out?
Card. There is a gentleman call’d Delio 135 Here in the camp, that hath been long approv’d His loyal friend. Set eye upon that fellow; Follow him to mass; may be Antonio, Although he do account religion But a school-name, for fashion of the world 140 May accompany him; or else go inquire out Delio’s confessor, and see if you can bribe Him to reveal it. There are a thousand ways A man might find to trace him; as to know What fellows haunt the Jews for taking up 145 Great sums of money, for sure he ’s in want; Or else to go to th’ picture-makers, and learn Who bought[3776] her picture lately: some of these Happily may take.
Bos. Well, I ’ll not freeze i’ th’ business: I would see that wretched thing, Antonio, 150 Above all sights i’ th’ world.
Card. Do, and be happy. Exit.
Bos. This fellow doth breed basilisks in ’s eyes, He ’s nothing else but murder; yet he seems Not to have notice of the duchess’ death. ’T is his cunning: I must follow his example; There cannot be a surer way to trace 156 Than that of an old fox.
[Re-enter JULIA, with a pistol.]
Julia. So, sir, you are well met.
Bos. How now!
Julia. Nay; the doors are fast enough: Now, sir, I will make you confess your treachery. 160
Bos. Treachery!
Julia. Yes, confess to me Which of my women ’t was you hir’d to put Love-powder into my drink?
Bos. Love powder!
Julia. Yes, when I was at Malfi. Why should I fall in love with such a face else? I have already suffer’d for thee so much pain. The only remedy to do me good 167 Is to kill my longing.
Bos. Sure, your pistol holds Nothing but perfumes or kissing-comfits.[3777] Excellent lady! 170 You have a pretty way on ’t to discover Your longing. Come, come, I ’ll disarm you, And arm you thus: yet this is wondrous strange.
Julia. Compare thy form and my eyes together, You ’ll find my love no such great miracle, 175 Now you ’ll say I am wanton: this nice modesty in ladies Is but a troublesome familiar That haunts them.
Bos. Know you me, I am a blunt soldier.
Julia. The better: Sure, there wants fire where there are no lively sparks 181 Of roughness.
Bos. And I want compliment.
Julia. Why, ignorance In courtship cannot make you do amiss, If you have a heart to do well.
Bos. You are very fair.
Julia. Nay, if you lay beauty to my charge, I must plead unguilty.
Bos. Your bright eyes 186 Carry a quiver of darts in them, sharper Than sun-beams.
Julia. You will mar me with commendation, Put yourself to the charge of courting me, Whereas now I woo you. 190
Bos. [Aside.] I have it, I will work upon this creature,— Let us grow most amorously familiar: If the great cardinal now should see me thus, Would he not count me a villain?
Julia. No; he might count me a wanton, 195 Not lay a scruple of offence on you; For if I see and steal a diamond, The fault is not i’ th’ stone, but in me the thief That purloins it. I am sudden with you. We that are great women of pleasure use to cut off 200 These uncertain wishes and unquiet longings, And in an instant join the sweet delight And the pretty excuse together. Had you been i’ th’ street, Under my chamber-window, even there I should have courted you. 205
Bos. O, you are an excellent lady!
Julia. Bid me do somewhat for you presently To express I love you.
Bos. I will; and if you love me, Fail not to effect it. The cardinal is grown wondrous melancholy; Demand the cause, let him not put you off 211 With feign’d excuse; discover the main ground on ’t.
Julia. Why would you know this?
Bos. I have depended on him, And I hear that he is fall’n in some disgrace With the emperor: if he be, like the mice 215 That forsake falling houses, I would shift To other dependance.
Julia. You shall not need Follow the wars: I ’ll be your maintenance.
Bos. And I your loyal servant: but I cannot Leave my calling.
Julia. Not leave an ungrateful 220 General for the love of a sweet lady! You are like some cannot sleep in feather-beds, But must have blocks for their pillows.
Bos. Will you do this?
Julia. Cunningly.
Bos. To-morrow I ’ll expect th’ intelligence.
Julia. To-morrow! Get you into my cabinet; 226 You shall have it with you. Do not delay me, No more than I do you: I am like one That is condemn’d; I have my pardon promis’d, But I would see it seal’d. Go, get you in: 230 You shall see me wind my tongue about his heart Like a skein of silk. [Exit BOSOLA.]
[Re-enter CARDINAL.]
Card. Where are you?
[Enter Servants.]
Servants. Here.
Card. Let none, upon your lives, have conference With the Prince Ferdinand, unless I know it.— [Aside.] In this distraction he may reveal 235 The murder. [Exeunt Servants.] Yond ’s my lingering consumption: I am weary of her, and by any means Would be quit of.
Julia. How now, my lord! what ails you?
Card. Nothing.
Julia. O, you are much alter’d: Come. I must be your secretary, and remove This lead from off your bosom: what’s the matter? 241
Card. I may not tell you.
Julia. Are you so far in love with sorrow You cannot part with part of it? Or think you I cannot love your grace when you are sad 245 As well as merry? Or do you suspect I, that have been a secret to your heart These many winters, cannot be the same Unto your tongue?
Card. Satisfy thy longing,— The only way to make thee keep my counsel Is, not to tell thee.
Julia. Tell your echo this, 251 Or flatterers, that like echoes still report What they hear, though most imperfect, and not me; For if that you be true unto yourself, I ’ll know.
Card. Will you rack me?
Julia. No, judgment shall Draw it from you: it is an equal fault, 256 To tell one’s secrets unto all or none.
Card. The first argues folly.
Julia. But the last tyranny.
Card. Very well: why, imagine I have committed 260 Some secret deed which I desire the world May never hear of.
Julia. Therefore may not I know it? You have conceal’d for me as great a sin As adultery. Sir, never was occasion For perfect trial of my constancy 265 Till now; sir, I beseech you——
Card. You ’ll repent it.
Julia. Never.
Card. It hurries thee to ruin: I ’ll not tell thee. Be well advis’d, and think what danger ’t is To receive a prince’s secrets. They that do, 270 Had need have their breasts hoop’d with adamant To contain them. I pray thee, yet be satisfi’d; Examine thine own frailty: ’t is more easy To tie knots than unloose them. ’T is a secret That, like a ling’ring poison, may chance lie Spread in thy veins, and kill thee seven year hence. 276
Julia. Now you dally with me.
Card. No more; thou shalt know it. By my appointment, the great Duchess of Malfi And two of her young children, four nights since, Were strangled.
Julia. O heaven! sir, what have you done!
Card. How now? How settles this? Think you your bosom 281 Will be a grave dark and obscure enough For such a secret?
Julia. You have undone yourself, sir.
Card. Why?
Julia. It lies not in me to conceal it.
Card. No? Come, I will swear you to ’t upon this book.
Julia. Most religiously.
Card. Kiss it. [She kisses the book.] 286 Now you shall never utter it; thy curiosity Hath undone thee; thou ’rt poison’d with that book. Because I knew thou couldst not keep my counsel, I have bound thee to ’t by death. 290
[Re-enter BOSOLA.]
Bos. For pity sake, hold!
Card. Ha, Bosola!
Julia. I forgive you This equal piece of justice you have done; For I betray’d your counsel to that fellow. He over-heard it; that was the cause I said It lay not in me to conceal it. 295
Bos. O foolish woman, Couldst not thou have poison’d him?
Julia. ’T is weakness Too much to think what should have been done. I go, I know not whither. [Dies.]
Card. Wherefore com’st thou hither?
Bos. That I might find a great man like yourself, 300 Not out of his wits, as the Lord Ferdinand, To remember my service.
Card. I ’ll have thee hew’d in pieces.
Bos. Make not yourself such a promise of that life Which is not yours to dispose of.
Card. Who plac’d thee here?
Bos. Her lust, as she intended.
Card. Very well: 306 Now you know me for your fellow-murderer.
Bos. And wherefore should you lay fair marble colours Upon your rotten purposes to me? Unless you imitate some that do plot great treasons, 310 And when they have done, go hide themselves i’ th’ graves Of those were actors in ’t?
Card. No more; there is A fortune attends thee.
Bos. Shall I go sue to Fortune any longer? ’T is the fool’s pilgrimage. 315
Card. I have honours in store for thee.
Bos. There are a many ways that conduct to seeming Honour, and some of them very dirty ones.
Card. Throw to the devil Thy melancholy. The fire burns well; 320 What need we keep a stirring of ’t, and make A greater smother?[3778] Thou wilt kill Antonio?
Bos. Yes.
Card. Take up that body.
Bos. I think I shall Shortly grow the common bier for church-yards.
Card. I will allow thee some dozen of attendants 325 To aid thee in the murder.
Bos. O, by no means. Physicians that apply horse-leeches to any rank swelling use to cut off their tails, that the blood may run through them the faster: let me have no train when I go (330) to shed blood, less it make me have a greater when I ride to the gallows.
Card. Come to me after midnight, to help to remove That body to her own lodging. I ’ll give out She died o’ th’ plague; ’t will breed the less inquiry 335 After her death.
Bos. Where ’s Castruccio her husband?
Card. He ’s rode to Naples, to take possession Of Antonio’s citadel.
Bos. Believe me, you have done a very happy turn. 340
Card. Fail not to come. There is the masterkey Of our lodgings; and by that you may conceive What trust I plant in you.
Bos. You shall find me ready. Exit CARDINAL. O poor Antonio, though nothing be so needful To thy estate as pity, yet I find 345 Nothing so dangerous! I must look to my footing: In such slippery ice-pavements men had need To be frost-nail’d well, they may break their necks else; The precedent ’s here afore me. How this man Bears up in blood! seems fearless! Why, ’t is well: 350 Security some men call the suburbs of hell, Only a dead wall between. Well, good Antonio, I ’ll seek thee out; and all my care shall be To put thee into safety from the reach Of these most cruel biters that have got 355 Some of thy blood already. It may be, I ’ll join with thee in a most just revenge. The weakest arm is strong enough that strikes With the sword of justice. Still methinks the duchess Haunts me: there, there!—’T is nothing but my melancholy. 360 O Penitence, let me truly taste thy cup, That throws men down only to raise them up! Exit.