Act IV…

Act IV

[SCENE I.][1495]

[Enter] GALLUS, AGRIPPINA.

Gal. You must have patience, royal Agrippina.

Agr. I must have vengeance first; and that were nectar Unto my famish’d spirits. O, my fortune, Let it be sudden thou prepar’st against me; Strike all my powers of understanding blind, 5 And ignorant of destiny to come! Let me not fear, that cannot hope.

Gal. Dear princess. These tyrannies on yourself are worse than Caesar’s.

Agr. Is this the happiness of being born great? Still to be aim’d at? still to be suspected? 10 To live the subject of all jealousies? At least the colour[1496] made, if not the ground To every painted danger? Who would not Choose once to fall, than thus to hang for ever?

Gal. You might be safe if you would——

Agr. What, my Gallus! 15 Be lewd Sejanus’ strumpet? Or the bawd To Caesar’s lusts, he now is gone to practise? Not these are safe, where nothing is. Yourself, While thus you stand but by me, are not safe. Was Silius safe? Or the good Sosia safe? 20 Or was my niece, dear Claudia Pulchra, safe, Or innocent Furnius? they that latest have (By being made guilty) added reputation To Afer’s eloquence? O, foolish friends, Could not so fresh example warn your loves, 25 But you must buy my favours with that loss Unto yourselves; and when you might perceive That Caesar’s cause of raging must forsake him, Before his will! Away, good Gallus, leave me. Here to be seen, is danger; to speak, treason: 30 To do me least observance, is call’d faction. You are unhappy in me, and I in all. Where are my sons Nero and Drusus? We Are they he shot at; let us fall apart; Not in our ruins sepulchre our friends. 35 Or shall we do some action like offence,[1497] To mock their studies that would make us faulty, And frustrate practice by preventing[1498] it? The danger’s like: for what they can contrive, They will make good. No innocence is safe 40 When power contests: nor can they trespass more, Whose only being[1499] was all crime before.

[Enter NERO, DRUSUS, and CALIGULA.]

Ner. You hear Sejanus is come back from Caesar?

Gal. No. How? disgrac’d?

Dru. More graced now than ever.

Gal. By what mischance?

Cal. A fortune like enough Once to be bad.

Dru. But turn’d too good to both. 46

Gal. What was’t?

Ner. Tiberius sitting at his meat, In a farm-house they call Spelunca, sited By the sea-side, among the Fundane hills, Within a natural cave; part of the grot, 50 About the entry, fell, and overwhelmed Some of the waiters; others ran away: Only Sejanus with his knees, hands, face, O’erhanging Caesar, did oppose himself To the remaining ruins, and was found 55 In that so labouring posture by the soldiers That came to succour him. With which adventure, He hath so fixt himself in Caesar’s trust, As thunder cannot move him, and is come With all the height of Caesar’s praise to Rome.

Agr. And power to turn those ruins all on us, 61 And bury whole posterities beneath them. Nero, and Drusus, and Caligula, Your places are the next, and therefore most In their offence. Think on your birth and blood, 65 Awake your spirits, meet their violence; ’T is princely when a tyrant doth oppose, And is a fortune sent to exercise Your virtue, as the wind doth try strong trees, Who by vexation[1500] grow more sound and firm. After your father’s fall, and uncle’s fate, 71 What can you hope, but all the change of stroke That force or sleight can give? Then stand upright; And though you do not act, yet suffer nobly: 74 Be worthy of my womb, and take strong cheer; What we do know will come, we should not fear. [Exeunt.]

[SCENE II.][1501]

[Enter] MACRO.

Mac. Return’d so soon! Renew’d in trust and grace! Is Caesar then so weak, or hath the place But wrought this alteration with the air; And he, on next remove, will all repair? Macro, thou art engag’d: and what before 5 Was public, now must be thy private more. The weal of Caesar, fitness did imply; But thine own fate confers necessity On thy employment; and the thoughts borne nearest 9 Unto ourselves, move swiftest still, and dearest. If he recover, thou art lost; yea, all The weight of preparation to his fall Will turn on thee, and crush thee: therefore strike Before he settle, to prevent the like Upon thyself. He doth his vantage know, 15 That makes it home,[1502] and gives the foremost blow. [Exit.]

[SCENE III.][1503]

[Enter] LATIARIS, RUFUS, and OPSIUS.

Lat. It is a service great Sejanus will See well requited, and accept of nobly. Here place yourselves between the roof and ceiling; And when I bring him to his words of danger, Reveal yourselves, and take him.

Ruf. Is he come? 5

Lat. I’ll now go fetch him. [Exit.]

Ops. With good speed.—I long To merit from the state in such an action.

Ruf. I hope it will obtain the consulship For one of us.

Ops. We cannot think of less, To bring in one so dangerous as Sabinus. 10

Ruf. He was a follower of Germanicus, And still is an observer[1504] of his wife And children, though they be declin’d in grace; A daily visitant, keeps them company In private and in public, and is noted 15 To be the only client of the house: Pray Jove, he will be free to Latiaris.

Ops. He ’s alli’d to him, and doth trust him well.

Ruf. And he’ll requite his trust!

Ops. To do an office So grateful to the state, I know no man 20 But would strain nearer bands than kindred—

Ruf. List! I hear them come.

Ops. Shift to our holes with silence. [They retire.]

[Re-enter] LATIARIS, SABINUS.

Lat. It is a noble constancy you show To this afflicted house; that not like others, The friends of season, you do follow fortune, 25 And, in the winter of their fate, forsake The place whose glories warm’d you. You are just, And worthy such a princely patron’s love, As was the world’s renown’d Germanicus, Whose ample merit when I call to thought, 30 And see his wife and issue objects made To so much envy, jealousy, and hate; It makes me ready to accuse the gods Of negligence, as men of tyranny.

Sab. They must be patient, so must we.

Lat. O Jove, What will become of us or of the times, 36 When, to be high or noble, are made crimes, When land and treasure are most dangerous faults?

Sab. Nay, when our table, yea our bed, assaults Our peace and safety? When our writings are By any envious instruments, that dare 41 Apply them to the guilty, made to speak What they will have to fit their tyrannous wreak? When ignorance is scarcely innocence; And knowledge made a capital offence? 45 When not so much, but the bare empty shade Of liberty, is reft[1505] us; and we made The prey to greedy vultures and vile spies, That first transfix us with their murdering eyes? 49

Lat. Methinks the genius of the Roman race Should not be so extinct, but that bright flame Of liberty might be reviv’d again, (Which no good man but with his life should lose) And we not sit like spent and patient fools, Still puffing in the dark at one poor coal, 55 Held on by hope, till the last spark is out. The cause is public, and the honour, name, The immortality of every soul, That is not bastard or a slave in Rome, Therein concern’d: whereto, if men would change 60 The weari’d arm, and for the weighty shield So long sustain’d, employ the facile sword, We might have soon assurance of our vows. This ass’s fortitude doth tire us all: It must be active valour must redeem 65 Our loss, or none. The rock and our hard steel Should meet t’ enforce those glorious fires again, Whose splendour cheer’d the world, and heat gave life No less than doth the sun’s.

Sab. ’T were better stay In lasting darkness, and despair of day. 70 No ill should force the subject undertake Against the sovereign, more than hell should make The gods do wrong. A good man should and must Sit rather down with loss than rise unjust; Though, when the Romans first did yield themselves 75 To one man’s power, they did not mean their lives, Their fortunes, and their liberties should be His absolute spoil, as purchas’d by the sword.

Lat. Why, we are worse, if to be slaves, and bond 79 To Caesar’s slave, be such, the proud Sejanus! He that is all, does all, gives Caesar leave To hide his ulcerous and anointed face, With his bald crown at Rhodes, while he here stalks Upon the heads of Romans and their princes, Familiarly to empire.

Sab. Now you touch 84 A point indeed, wherein he shows his art, As well as power.

Lat. And villany in both. Do you observe where Livia lodges? How Drusus came dead? What men have been cut off?

Sab. Yes, those are things remov’d. I nearer lookt 90 Into his later practice, where he stands Declar’d a master in his mystery. First, ere Tiberius went, he wrought his fear To think that Agrippina sought his death. Then put those doubts in her; sent her oft word, 95 Under the show of friendship, to beware Of Caesar, for he laid to poison her: Drave them to frowns, to mutual jealousies, Which, now, in visible hatred are burst out. Since, he hath had his hired instruments 100 To work on Nero, and to heave him up; To tell him Caesar’s old, that all the people, Yea, all the army have their eyes on him; That both do long to have him undertake 104 Something of worth, to give the world a hope; Bids him to court their grace: the easy youth Perhaps gives ear, which straight he writes to Caesar; And with this comment: “See yon dangerous boy; Note but the practice of the mother, there; She’s tying him for purposes at hand, 110 With men of sword.” Here’s Caesar put in fright ’Gainst son and mother. Yet he leaves not thus, The second brother, Drusus, a fierce nature, And fitter for his snares, because ambitious And full of envy, him he clasps and hugs, 115 Poisons with praise, tells him what hearts he wears, How bright he stands in popular expectance; That Rome doth suffer with him in the wrong His mother does him, by preferring Nero: 119 Thus sets he them asunder, each ’gainst other. Projects the course that serves him to condemn, Keeps in opinion of a friend to all, And all drives on to ruin.

Lat. Caesar sleeps, And nods at this.

Sab. Would he might ever sleep, Bogg’d in his filthy lusts! [OPSIUS and RUFUS rush in.]

Ops. Treason to Caesar! 125

Ruf. Lay hands upon the traitor, Latiaris, Or take the name thyself.

Lat. I am for Caesar.

Sab. Am I then catch’d?

Ruf. How think you, sir? You are.

Sab. Spies of this head, so white, so full of years! Well, my most reverend monsters, you may live To see yourself thus snar’d.

Ops. Away with him! 131

Lat. Hale him away.

Ruf. To be a spy for traitors, Is honourable vigilance.

Sab. You do well, My most officious instruments of state, Men of all uses. Drag me hence, away. 135 The year is well begun, and I fall fit To be an off’ring to Sejanus. Go!

Ops. Cover him with his garments, hide his face.

Sab. It shall not need. Forbear your rude assault. The fault’s not shameful, villany makes a fault. [Exeunt.] 140

[SCENE IV.][1506]

[Enter] MACRO, CALIGULA.

Mac. Sir, but observe how thick your dangers meet In his clear drifts![1507] Your mother and your brothers, Now cited to the senate; their friend Gallus, Feasted to-day by Caesar, since committed! Sabinus here we met, hurried to fetters: 5 The senators all struck with fear and silence, Save those whose hopes depend not on good means, But force their private prey from public spoil. And you must know, if here you stay, your state Is sure to be the subject of his hate, 10 As now the object.

Cal. What would you advise me?

Mac. To go for Capreae presently; and there Give up yourself entirely to your uncle. Tell Caesar (since your mother is accus’d To fly for succours to Augustus’ statue, 15 And to the army, with your brethren) you Have rather chose to place your aids in him Than live suspected; or in hourly fear To be thrust out, by bold Sejanus’ plots: Which you shall confidently urge to be 20 Most full of peril to the state, and Caesar, As being laid to his peculiar ends, And not to be let run with common safety. All which, upon the second, I’ll make plain, So both shall love and trust with Caesar gain.

Cal. Away then, let’s prepare us for our journey. [Exeunt.] 26

[SCENE V.][1508]

[Enter] ARRUNTIUS.

Arr. Still dost thou suffer, heaven! Will no flame, No heat of sin, make thy just wrath to boil In thy distemp’red bosom, and o’erflow The pitchy blazes of impiety, Kindled beneath thy throne! Still canst thou sleep, 5 Patient, while vice doth make an antic face At thy dread power, and blow dust and smoke Into thy nostrils! Jove, will nothing wake thee? Must vile Sejanus pull thee by the beard, Ere thou wilt open thy black-lidded eye, 10 And look him dead? Well! snore on, dreaming gods; And let this last of that proud giant-race Heave mountain upon mountain ’gainst your state.— Be good unto me, Fortune and you powers, Whom I, expostulating, have profan’d; 15 I see (what’s equal with a prodigy) A great, a noble Roman, and an honest, Live an old man!— [Enter LEPIDUS.][1509] O Marcus Lepidus, When is our turn to bleed? Thyself and I, Without our boast, are a’most all the few 20 Left to be honest in these impious times.

Lep. What we are left to be, we will be, Lucius; Though tyranny did stare as wide as death, To fright us from it.

Arr. ’T hath so on Sabinus.

Lep. I saw him now drawn from the Gemonies,[1510] 26 And what increas’d the direness of the fact, His faithful dog, upbraiding all us Romans, Never forsook the corpse, but, seeing it thrown Into the stream, leap’d in, and drown’d with it.

Arr. O act, to be envi’d him of us men! 30 We are the next the hook lays hold on. Marcus What are thy arts, good patriot, teach them me, That have preserv’d thy hairs to this white dye, And kept so reverend and so dear a head Safe on his comely shoulders?

Lep. Arts, Arruntius! 35 None, but the plain and passive fortitude, To suffer and be silent; never stretch These arms against the torrent; live at home, With my own thoughts and innocence about me, Not tempting the wolves’ jaws: these are my arts. 40

Arr. I would begin to study ’em, if I thought They would secure me. May I pray to Jove In secret and be safe? ay, or aloud, With open wishes, so I do not mention Tiberius or Sejanus? Yes, I must, 45 If I speak out. ’T is hard, that. May I think, And not be rackt? What danger is ’t to dream, Talk in one’s sleep, or cough? Who knows the law? May I shake my head without a comment? say It rains, or it holds up, and not be thrown 50 Upon the Gemonies? These now are things, Whereon men’s fortune, yea, their fate depends. Nothing hath privilege ’gainst the violent ear. No place, no day, no hour, we see, is free, (Not our religious and most sacred times) 55 From some one kind of cruelty: all matter, Nay, all occasion pleaseth. Madmen’s rage, The idleness of drunkards, women’s nothing, Jester’s simplicity, all, all is good That can be catcht at. Nor is now th’ event 60 Of any person, or for any crime, To be expected;[1511] for ’t is always one: Death, with some little difference of place, Or time——What’s this? Prince Nero, guarded!

[Enter] LACO and NERO [with GUARDS.]

Lac. On, lictors, keep your way. My lords, forbear. 65 On pain of Caesar’s wrath, no man attempt Speech with the prisoner.

Ner. Noble friends, be safe; To lose yourselves for words, were as vain hazard, As unto me small comfort. Fare you well. Would all Rome’s sufferings in my fate did dwell! 70

Lac. Lictors, away.

Lep. Where goes he, Laco?

Lac. Sir, He’s banished into Pontia by the senate.

Arr. Do I see, and hear, and feel? May I trust sense, Or doth my phant’sie form it?

Lep. Where ’s his brother?

Lac. Drusus is prisoner in the palace.

Arr. Ha! 75 I smell it now: ’t is rank. Where’s Agrippina?

Lac. The princess is confin’d to Pandataria.

Arr. Bolts, Vulcan; bolts for Jove! Phoebus, thy bow; Stern Mars, thy sword; and, blue-ey’d Maid, thy spear; Thy club, Alcides: all the armoury 80 Of heaven is too little!—Ha! to guard The gods, I meant. Fine, rare dispatch! This same Was swiftly borne! Confin’d, imprison’d, banish’d? Most tripartite! The cause, sir?

Lac. Treason.

Arr. O! The complement of all accusings! That 85 Will hit, when all else fails.

Lep. This turn is strange! But yesterday the people would not hear, Far less objected, but cri’d Caesar’s letters Were false and forg’d; that all these plots were malice; And that the ruin of the prince’s house 90 Was practis’d ’gainst his knowledge. Where are now Their voices, now that they behold his heirs Lock’d up, disgrac’d, led into exile?

Arr. Hush’d, Drown’d in their bellies. Wild Sejanus’ breath Hath, like a whirlwind, scatter’d that poor dust, 95 With his rude blast.—We’ll talk no treason, sir. Turns to LACO, and the rest. If that be it you stand for. Fare you well. We have no need of horse-leeches. Good spy, Now you are spi’d, be gone. [Exeunt LACO, NERO, and GUARDS.]

Lep. I fear you wrong him: He has the voice to be an honest Roman. 100

Arr. And trusted to this office! Lepidus, I’d sooner trust Greek Sinon than a man Our state employs. He’s gone: and being gone, I dare tell you, whom I dare better trust, That our night-ey’d Tiberius doth not see 105 His minion’s drifts; or, if he do, he ’s not So arrant subtile, as we fools do take him; To breed a mongrel up, in his own house. With his own blood, and, if the good gods please, At his own throat flesh him to take a leap. 110 I do not beg it, heav’n; but if the fates Grant it these eyes, they must not wink.

Lep. They must Not see it, Lucius.

Arr. Who should let[1512] ’em?

Lep. Zeal, And duty; with the thought he is our prince.

Arr. He is our monster: forfeited to vice 115 So far, as no rack’d virtue can redeem him. His loathed person fouler than all crimes: An emp’ror only in his lusts. Retir’d, From all regard of his own fame, or Rome’s, Into an obscure island, where he lives 120 Acting his tragedies with a comic face, Amidst his rout of Chaldees: spending hours, Days, weeks, and months, in the unkind[1513] abuse Of grave astrology, to the bane of men, Casting the scope of men’s nativities, 125 And having found aught worthy in their fortune, Kill, or precipitate them in the sea, And boast he can mock fate. Nay, muse not: these Are far from ends of evil, scarce degrees. He hath his slaughter-house at Capreae; 130 Where he doth study murder as an art; And they are dearest in his grace that can Devise the deepest tortures. Thither, too, He hath his boys, and beauteous girls ta’en up Out of our noblest houses, the best form’d, 135 Best nurtur’d, and most modest; what’s their good, Serves to provoke his bad. Some are allur’d, Some threat’ned; others, by their friends detain’d, Are ravish’d hence, like captives, and, in sight Of their most grieved parents, dealt away 140 Unto his spintries,[1514] sellaries,[1515] and slaves Masters of strange and new commented lusts, For which wise nature hath left not a name. To this (what most strikes us, and bleeding Rome) He is, with all his craft, become the ward 145 To his own vassal, a stale catamite.[1514] Whom he, upon our low and suffering necks, Hath raised from excrement to side the gods, And have his proper sacrifice in Rome: Which Jove beholds, and yet will sooner rive 150 A senseless oak with thunder than his trunk!

[Re-enter] LACO, POMPONIUS, MINUTIUS.

Lac. These letters make men doubtful what t’ expect, Whether his coming, or his death.

Pom. Troth, both: And which comes soonest, thank the gods for.

Arr. (Aside.) List! Their talk is Caesar; I would hear all voices. 155 [ARRUNT. and LEPIDUS stand aside.]

Min. One day, he’s well; and will return to Rome; The next day, sick; and knows not when to hope it.

Lac. True; and to-day, one of Sejanus’ friends Honour’d by special writ; and on the morrow Another punish’d——

Pom. By more special writ. 160

Min. This man receives his praises of Sejanus, A second but slight mention, a third none, A fourth rebukes: and thus he leaves the senate Divided and suspended, all uncertain.

Lac. These forked tricks, I understand ’em not: 165 Would he would tell us whom he loves or hates, That we might follow, without fear or doubt.

Arr. (Aside.) Good Heliotrope! Is this your honest man? Let him be yours so still; he is my knave.

Pom. I cannot tell, Sejanus still goes on, 170 And mounts, we see; new statues are advanc’d,[1516] Fresh leaves of titles, large inscriptions read, His fortune sworn by, himself new gone out Caesar’s colleague in the fifth consulship; More altars smoke to him than all the gods: 175 What would be more?

Arr. (Aside.) That the dear smoke would choke him, [That would I more.

Lep. Peace, good Arruntius.][1517]

Lat. But there are letters come, they say, ev’n now, Which do forbid that last.

Min. Do you hear so?

Lac. Yes.

Pom. By Castor that’s the worst.

Arr. (Aside.) By Pollux, best.

Min. I did not like the sign, when Regulus, Whom all we know no friend unto Sejanus, 182 Did, by Tiberius’ so precise command, Succeed a fellow in the consulship: It boded somewhat.

Pom. Not a mote. His partner, Fulcinius Trio, is his own, and sure.— 186 Here comes Terentius. [Enter TERENTIUS] He can give us more. [They whisper with TERENTIUS.]

Lep. I’ll ne’er believe but Caesar hath some scent Of bold Sejanus’ footing. These cross points Of varying letters, and opposing consuls, 190 Mingling his honours and his punishments, Feigning now ill, now well, raising Sejanus, And then depressing him, as now of late In all reports we have it, cannot be Empty of practice: ’t is Tiberius’ art, 195 For, having found his favourite grown too great, And with his greatness strong; that all the soldiers Are, with their leaders, made at his devotion; That almost all the senate are his creatures, Or hold on him their main dependencies, 200 Either for benefit, or hope, or fear; And that himself hath lost much of his own, By parting unto him; and, by th’ increase Of his rank lusts and rages, quite disarm’d Himself of love, or other public means 205 To dare an open contestation; His subtilty hath chose this doubling line, To hold him even in: not so to fear him, As wholly put him out, and yet give check Unto his farther boldness. In mean time, 210 By his employments, makes him odious Unto the staggering rout, whose aid, in fine, He hopes to use, as sure, who, when they sway, Bear down, o’erturn all objects in their way. 214

Arr. You may be a Lynceus, Lepidus: yet I See no such cause, but that a political tyrant, Who can so well disguise it, should have ta’en A nearer way: feign’d honest, and come home To cut his throat, by law.

Lep. Ay, but his fear Would ne’er be mask’d, all be his vices were.

Pom. His lordship then is still in grace?

Ter. Assure you, Never in more, either of grace or power. 223

Pom. The gods are wise and just.

Arr. (Aside.) The fiends they are, To suffer thee belie ’em.

Ter. I have here His last and present letters, where he writes him, 225 “The partner of his cares,” and “his Sejanus.”—

Lac. But is that true, if ’t is prohibited To sacrifice unto him?

Ter. Some such thing Caesar makes scruple of, but forbids it not; No more than to himself: says he could wish It were forborne to all.

Luc. Is it no other? 231

Ter. No other, on my trust. For your more surety, Here is that letter too.

Arr. (Aside.) How easily Do wretched men believe what they would have! 234 Looks this like plot?

Lep. (Aside.) Noble Arruntius, stay.

Lac. He names him here without his titles.

Lep. (Aside.) Note!

Arr. (Aside.) Yes, and come off your notable fool. I will.

Lac. No other than Sejanus.

Pom. That’s but haste In him that writes: here he gives large amends.

Mar. And with his own hand written?

Pom. Yes.

Lac. Indeed?

Ter. Believe it, gentlemen, Sejanus’ breast Never receiv’d more full contentments in, 242 Than at this present.

Pom. Takes he well th’ escape Of young Caligula, with Macro?

Ter. Faith, At the first air it somewhat troubled him. 245

Lep. (Aside.) Observe you?

Arr. (Aside.) Nothing; riddles. Till I see Sejanus struck, no sound thereof strikes me. [Exeunt ARRUNTIUS and LEPIDUS.]

Pom. I like it not. I muse he ’d not attempt Somewhat against him in the consulship, Seeing the people ’gin to favour him. 250

Ter. He doth repent it now; but he ’s employ’d Pagonianus after him: and he holds That correspondence there, with all that are Near about Caesar, as no thought can pass Without his knowledge, thence, in act to front him. 255

Pom. I gratulate the news.

Lac. But how comes Macro So in trust and favour with Caligula?

Pom. O, sir, he has a wife; and the young prince An appetite: he can look up and spy Flies in the roof, when there are fleas i’ bed; 260 And hath a learned nose t’ assure his sleeps. Who to be favour’d of the rising sun, Would not lend little of his waning moon? It is the saf’st ambition. Noble Terentius!

Ter. The night grows fast upon us. At your service. [Exeunt.] 265

CHORUS—of Musicians.

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Act V

[SCENE I.][1518]

[Enter] SEJANUS.

Sej. Swell, swell, my joys; and faint not to declare Yourselves as ample as your causes are. I did not live till now: this my first hour, Wherein I see my thoughts reach’d by my power. But this, and gripe my wishes. Great and high, The world knows only two, that’s Rome and I. 6 My roof receives me not; ’t is air I tread; And, at each step, I feel my advanced head Knock out a star in heaven! Rear’d to this height, All my desires seem modest, poor, and slight, That did before sound impudent; ’t is place, 11 Not blood, discerns the noble and the base. Is there not something more than to be Caesar? Must we rest there? it irks t’ have come so far, To be so near a stay. Caligula, 15 Would thou stood ’st stiff, and many in our way! Winds lose their strength, when they do empty fly, Unmet of woods or buildings; great fires die, That want their matter to withstand them: so, It is our grief, and will be our loss, to know 20 Our power shall want opposites; unless The gods, by mixing in the cause, would bless Our fortune with their conquest. That were worth Sejanus’ strife, durst fates but bring it forth.

[Enter] TERENTIUS.

Ter. Safety to great Sejanus!

Sej. Now, Terentius? 25

Ter. Hears not my lord the wonder?

Sej. Speak it; no.

Ter. I meet it violent in the people’s mouths, Who run in routs to Pompey’s theatre, To view your statue; which, they say, sends forth A smoke, as from a furnace, black and dreadful. 30

Sej. Some traitor hath put fire in: you, go see, And let the head be taken off, to look What ’t is. [Exit TERENTIUS.] Some slave hath practis’d an imposture To stir the people.—How now! Why return you?

[Re-enter TERENTIUS, with] SATRIUS and NATTA.

Sat. The head, my lord, already is ta’en off, 35 I saw it; and, at opening, there leapt out A great and monstrous serpent.

Sej. Monstrous! Why? Had it a beard, and horns? no heart? a tongue Forked as flattery? Look’d it of the hue To such as live in great men’s bosoms? Was 40 The spirit of it Macro’s?

Nat. May it please The most divine Sejanus, in my days, (And by his sacred fortune, I affirm it,) I have not seen a more extended, grown, Foul, spotted, venomous, ugly——

Sej. O, the fates! 45 What a wild muster ’s here of attributes, T’ express a worm, a snake!

Ter. But how that should Come there, my lord?

Sej. What, and you too, Terentius! I think you mean to make ’t a prodigy In your reporting.

Ter. Can the wise Sejanus 50 Think heav’n hath meant it less?

Sej. O, superstition! Why, then the falling of our bed, that brake This morning, burd’ned with the populous weight Of our expecting clients, to salute us; Or running of the cat betwixt our legs, 55 As we set forth unto the Capitol, Were prodigies.

Ter. I think them ominous: And would they had not happ’ned! As, to-day, The fate of some your servants: who declining[1519] Their way, not able, for the throng, to follow, Slipt down the Gemonies, and brake their necks! 61 Besides, in taking your last augury, No prosperous bird appear’d; but croaking ravens Flagg’d up and down, and from the sacrifice Flew to the prison, where they sat all night, 65 Beating the air with their obstreperous beaks! I dare not counsel, but I could entreat, That great Sejanus would attempt the gods Once more with sacrifice.

Sej. What excellent fools Religion makes of men! Believes Terentius, 70 If these were dangers, as I shame to think them, The gods could change the certain course of fate? Or, if they could they would, now in a moment, For a beeve’s fat, or less, be brib’d t’ invert Those long decrees? Then think the gods, like flies, 75 Are to be taken with the steam of flesh, Or blood, diffus’d about their altars: think Their power as cheap as I esteem it small. Of all the throng that fill th’ Olympian hall, And, without pity, lade poor Atlas’ back, 80 I know not that one deity, but Fortune, To whom I would throw up, in begging smoke, One grain of incense; or whose ear I’d buy With thus much oil. Her I indeed adore; And keep her grateful image in my house, 85 Sometimes belonging to a Roman king, But now call’d mine, as by the better style: To her I care not, if, for satisfying Your scrupulous phant’sies, I go offer. Bid Our priest prepare us honey, milk, and poppy, 90 His masculine odours, and night-vestments: say Our rites are instant; which perform’d, you ’ll see How vain, and worthy laughter, your fears be. [Exeunt.]

[SCENE II.][1520]

[Enter] COTTA and POMPONIUS.

Cot. Pomponius, whither in such speed?

Pom. I go. To give my lord Sejanus notice——

Cot. What?

Pom. Of Macro.

Cot. Is he come?

Pom. Ent’red but now The house of Regulus.

Cot. The opposite consul!

Pom. Some half hour since.

Cot. And by night too! Stay, sir; 5 I ’ll bear you company.

Pom. Along then. [Exeunt.]

[SCENE III.][1521]

[Enter] MACRO, REGULUS, [and Attendant.]

Mac. ’T is Caesar’s will to have a frequent senate; And therefore must your edict lay deep mulct On such as shall be absent.

Reg. So it doth. Bear it my fellow consul to adscribe.[1522]

Mac. And tell him it must early be proclaim’d: 5 The place Apollo’s temple. [Exit Attendant.]

Reg. That ’s rememb’red.

Mac. And at what hour?

Reg. Yes.

Mac. You do forget To send one for the provost of the watch.

Reg. I have not: here he comes.

[Enter] LACO.

Mac. Gracinus Laco, You are a friend most welcome: by and by, 10 I ’ll speak with you.—You must procure this list Of the praetorian cohorts, with the names Of the centurions, and their tribunes.

Reg. Ay.

Mac. I bring you letters, and a health from Caesar.

Lac. Sir, both come well.

Mac. And, hear you? with your note, 15 Which are the eminent men, and most of action.

Reg. That shall be done you too. Goes out.

Mac. Most worthy Laco,— Caesar salutes you.—Consul! death and furies! Gone now!—The argument will please you, sir.— Ho! Regulus! The anger of the gods 20 Follow your diligent legs, and overtake ’em, In likeness of the gout! Re-enter REGULUS. O, my good lord, We lackt you present: I would pray you send Another to Fulcinius Trio, straight, To tell him you will come and speak with him: 25 The matter we ’ll devise, to stay him there, While I with Laco do survey the watch. REGULUS goes out again. What are your strengths, Gracinus?

Lac. Seven cohorts.

Mac. You see what Caesar writes; and—Gone again! H’ as sure a vein of mercury in his feet.—— 30 Know you what store of the praetorian soldiers Sejanus holds about him, for his guard?

Lac. I cannot the just[1523] number; but I think Three centuries.

Mac. Three! good.

Lac. At most not four.

Mac. And who be those centurions?

Lac. That the consul 35 Can best deliver you.

Mac. When he’s away! Spite on his nimble industry!—Gracinus, You find what place you hold, there, in the trust Of royal Caesar?

Lac. Ay, and I am——

Mac. Sir, 39 The honours there propos’d are but beginnings Of his great favours.

Lac. They are more——

Mac. I heard him When he did study what to add.

Lac. My life, And all I hold——

Mac. You were his own first choice! Which doth confirm as much as you can speak; And will, if we succeed, make more——Your guards 45 Are seven cohorts, you say?

Lac. Yes.

Mac. Those we must Hold still in readiness and undischarg’d.

Lac. I understand so much. But how it can——

Mac. Be done without suspicion, you’ll object?

Re-enter REGULUS.

Reg. What’s that.

Lac. The keeping of the watch in arms, 50 When morning comes.

Mac. The senate shall be met, and set So early in the temple, as all mark Of that shall be avoided.

Reg. If we need, We have commission to possess the palace, 54 Enlarge Prince Drusus, and make him our chief.

Mac. (Aside.) That secret would have burnt his reverend mouth, Had he not spit it out now.——By the gods. You carry things too——Let me borrow a man Or two, to bear these——That of freeing Drusus, Caesar projected as the last and utmost; 60 Not else to be rememb’red.

[Enter Servants.]

Reg. Here are servants.

Mac. These to Arruntius, these to Lepidus. This bear to Cotta, this to Latiaris. If they demand you of me, say I have ta’en Fresh horse and am departed. [Exeunt Servants.] You, my lord, 65 To your colleague, and be you sure to hold him With long narration of the new fresh favours, Meant to Sejanus, his great patron; I, With trusted Laco, here, are for the guards: Then, to divide. For night hath many eyes, 70 Whereof, though most do sleep, yet some are spies. [Exeunt.]

[SCENE IV.][1524]

[Enter] Praecones, Flamen, [Tubicines, Tibicines,] Ministri, SEJANUS, TERENTIUS, SATRIUS, [NATTA,] etc.

Prae. Be all profane far hence; fly, fly far off: Be absent far; far hence be all profane!

Tubicines[1525] and Tibicines[1526] sound while the Flamen washeth.

Fla. We have been faulty, but repent us now. And bring pure hands, pure vestments, and pure minds. 4

1 Min. Pure vessels.

2 Min. And pure offerings.

3 Min. Garlands pure.

Fla. Bestow your garlands: and, with reverence place The vervain[1527] on the altar.

Prae. Favour your tongues.

While they sound again, the Flamen takes of the honey with his finger, and tastes, then ministers to all the rest: so of the milk in an earthen vessel, he deals about; which done, he sprinkleth upon the altar, milk; then imposeth the honey, and kindleth his gums, and after censing about the altar, placeth his censer thereon, into which they put several branches of poppy, and the music ceasing, proceed.

Fla. Great mother Fortune, queen of human state, Rectress of action, arbitress of fate, To whom all sway, all power, all empire bows, Be present, and propitious to our vows! 11

Prae. Favour it with your tongues.

Min. Be present, and propitious to our vows! Accept our off’ring, and be pleas’d, great goddess. 14

Ter. See, see, the image stirs!

Sat. And turns away!

Nat. Fortune averts her face!

Fla. Avert, you gods, The prodigy. Still! still! some pious rite We have neglected. Yet, heav’n be appeas’d, And be all tokens false or void, that speak 19 Thy present wrath!

Sej. Be thou dumb, scrupulous priest: And gather up thyself, with these thy wares, Which I, in spite of thy blind mistress, or Thy juggling mystery, religion, throw Thus scorned on the earth. [Overturns the statue and the altar.] Nay, hold thy look Averted till I woo thee turn again; 25 And thou shalt stand, to all posterity, Th’ eternal game and laughter, with thy neck Writh’d to thy tail, like a ridiculous cat. Avoid[1528] these fumes, these superstitious lights, And all these cos’ning[1529] ceremonies; you, 30 Your pure and spiced[1530] conscience! [Exeunt all but SEJANUS, TERENTIUS, SATRIUS, and NATTA.] I, the slave And mock of fools, (scorn on my worthy head!) That have been titled and ador’d a god, Yea sacrific’d unto, myself, in Rome, No less than Jove: and I be brought to do 35 A peevish giglot[1531] rites! Perhaps the thought And shame of that made Fortune turn her face, Knowing herself the lesser deity, And but my servant.—Bashful queen, if so, Sejanus thanks thy modesty.—Who’s that? 40

[Enter] POMPONIUS and MINUTIUS.

Pom. His fortune suffers, till he hears my news: I have waited here too long. Macro, my lord——

Sej. Speak lower and withdraw. [Takes him aside.]

Ter. Are these things true?

Min. Thousands are gazing at it in the streets.

Sej. What’s that?

Ter. Minutius tells us here, my lord, 45 That a new head being set upon your statue, A rope is since found wreath’d about it! and, But now, a fiery meteor in the form Of a great ball was seen to roll along 49 The troubled air, where yet it hangs unperfect, The amazing wonder of the multitude!

Sej. No more. That Macro ’s come, is more than all!

Ter. Is Macro come?

Pom. I saw him.

Ter. Where? with whom?

Pom. With Regulus.

Sej. Terentius!

Ter. My lord.

Sej. Send for the tribunes, we will straight have up 55 More of the soldiers for our guard. [Exit TER.] Minutius, We pray you go for Cotta, Latiaris, Trio the consul, or what senators You know are sure, and ours. [Exit MIN.] You, my good Natta, For Laco, provost of the watch. [Exit NAT.] Now, Satrius, 60 The time of proof comes on; arm all our servants, And without tumult. [Exit SAT.] You, Pomponius, Hold some good correspondence with the consul: Attempt him, noble friend. [Exit POMP.] These things begin To look like dangers, now, worthy my fates. 65 Fortune, I see thy worst: let doubtful states, And things uncertain hang upon thy will; Me surest death shall render certain still. Yet, why is now my thought turn’d toward death, Whom fates have let go on so far in breath, 70 Uncheck’d or unreprov’d? I, that did help To fell the lofty cedar of the world Germanicus; that at one stroke cut down Drusus, that upright elm; wither’d his vine; Laid Silius and Sabinus, two strong oaks, 75 Flat on the earth; besides those other shrubs, Cordus and Sosia, Claudia Pulchra, Furnius and Gallus, which I have grubb’d up; And since, have set my axe so strong and deep Into the root of spreading Agrippine; 80 Lopt off and scatter’d her proud branches, Nero, Drusus; and Caius too, although replanted. If you will, Destinies, that after all, I faint now ere I touch my period. You are but cruel; and I already have done 85 Things great enough. All Rome hath been my slave; The senate sate an idle looker-on, And witness of my power; when I have blush’d More to command than it to suffer:[1532] all The fathers have sat ready and prepar’d 90 To give me empire, temples, or their throats, When I would ask ’em; and, what crowns the top, Rome, senate, people, all the world have seen Jove but my equal; Caesar but my second. ’T is then your malice, Fates, who, but your own, 95 Envy and fear t’ have any power long known. [Exit.]

[SCENE V.][1533]

[Enter] TERENTIUS and Tribunes.

Ter. Stay here: I’ll give[1534] his lordship you are come.

[Enter] MINUTIUS, COTTA, LATIARIS.

Min. Marcus Terentius, pray you tell my lord Here’s Cotta, and Latiaris.

Ter. Sir, I shall. [Exit.]

Cot. My letter is the very same with yours; Only requires me to be present there, 5 And give my voice to strengthen his design.

Lat. Names he not what it is?

Cot. No, nor to you.

Lat. ’T is strange and singular doubtful!

Cot. So it is, It may be all is left to lord Sejanus.

[Enter] NATTA and GRACINUS LACO.

Nat. Gentlemen, where ’s my lord?

Tri. We wait him here. 10

Cot. The provost Laco! What’s the news?

Lat. My lord——

[Enter] SEJANUS.

Sej. Now, my right dear, noble, and trusted friends, How much I am a captive to your kindness! Most worthy Cotta, Latiaris, Laco, Your valiant hand; and, gentlemen, your loves. I wish I could divide myself unto you; 15 Or that it lay within our narrow powers, To satisfy for so enlarged bounty. Gracinus, we must pray you, hold your guards Unquit when morning comes. Saw you the consul? 20

Min. Trio will presently be here, my lord.

Cot. They are but giving order for the edict, To warn the senate?

Sej. How! the senate?

Lac. Yes. This morning in Apollo’s temple—

Cot. We Are charg’d by letter to be there, my lord. 25

Sej. By letter! Pray you let’s see.

Lat. Knows not his lordship?

Cot. It seems so!

Sej. A senate warn’d! without my knowledge! And on this sudden! Senators by letters Required to be there! Who brought these?

Cot. Macro, 30

Sej. Mine enemy! And when?

Cot. This midnight.

Sej. Time, With ev’ry other circumstance, doth give It hath some strain of engine[1535] in ’t!—How now?

[Enter] SATRIUS.

Sat. My lord, Sertorius Macro is without, Alone, and prays t’ have private conference 35 In business of high nature with your lordship, He says to me, and which regards you much.

Sej. Let him come here.

Sat. Better, my lord, withdraw: You will betray what store and strength of friends Are now about you; which he comes to spy. 40

Sej. Is he not arm’d?

Sat. We’ll search him.

Sej. No; but take, And lead him to some room, where you conceal’d May keep a guard upon us. [Exit SAT.] Noble Laco, You are our trust; and till our own cohorts Can be brought up, your strengths must be our guard. 45 Now, good Minutius, honour’d Latiaris,

He salutes them humbly.

Most worthy and my most unwearied friends; I return instantly. [Exit.]

Lat. Most worthy lord!

Cot. His lordship is turn’d instant kind, methinks; I have not observ’d it in him heretofore. 50

1 Tri. ’T is true, and it becomes him nobly.

Min. I Am rapt withal.

2 Tri. By Mars, he has my lives, Were they a million, for this only grace.

Lac. Ay, and to name a man!

Lat. As he did me!

Min. And me!

Lat. Who would not spend his life and fortunes To purchase but the look of such a lord? 55

Lac. [Aside.] He that would nor be lord’s fool, nor the world’s. [Exeunt.]

[SCENE VI.][1536]

Enter SEJANUS, MACRO, and SATRIUS.

Sej. Macro! most welcome, as most coveted friend! Let me enjoy my longings. When arriv’d you?

Mac. About the noon of night.

Sej. Satrius, give leave. [Exit SATRIUS.]

Mac. I have been, since I came, with both the consuls, On a particular design from Caesar. 5

Sej. How fares it with our great and royal master?

Mac. Right plentifully well; as with a prince That still holds out the great proportion Of his large favours, where his judgment hath Made once divine election: like the god 10 That wants not, nor is wearied to bestow Where merit meets his bounty, as it doth In you, already the most happy, and, ere The sun shall climb the south, most high Sejanus. Let not my lord be amus’d.[1537] For to this end 15 Was I by Caesar sent for to the isle, With special caution to conceal my journey; And thence had my despatch as privately Again to Rome; charg’d to come here by night; And only to the consuls make narration 20 Of his great purpose: that the benefit Might come more full, and striking, by how much It was less look’d for, or aspir’d by you, Or least informed to the common thought.

Sej. What may this be? Part of myself, dear Macro, 25 If good, speak out; and share with your Sejanus.

Mac. If bad, I should for ever loathe myself To be the messenger to so good a lord. I do exceed my instructions to acquaint Your lordship with thus much; but ’t is my venture 30 On your retentive wisdom: and because I would no jealous scruple should molest Or rack your peace of thought. For I assure My noble lord, no senator yet knows The business meant: though all by several letters 35 Are warned to be there, and give their voices, Only to add unto the state and grace Of what is purpos’d.

Sej. You take pleasure, Macro, Like a coy wench, in torturing your lover. 39 What can be worth this suffering?

Mac. That which follows, The tribunitial dignity and power: Both which Sejanus is to have this day Conferr’d upon him, and by public senate.

Sej. Fortune be mine again! [Aside.] Thou hast satisfied For thy suspected loyalty.

Mac. My lord, 45 I have no longer time, the day approacheth, And I must back to Caesar.

Sej. Where’s Caligula?

Mac. That I forgot to tell your lordship. Why, He lingers yonder about Capreae, Disgrac’d; Tiberius hath not seen him yet. 50 He needs would thrust himself to go with me, Against my wish or will; but I have quitted His forward trouble,[1538] with as tardy note As my neglect or silence could afford him. 54 Your lordship cannot now command me aught, Because I take no knowledge that I saw you; But I shall boast to live to serve your lordship; And so take leave.

Sej. Honest and worthy Macro: Your love and friendship. [Exit MACRO.] Who’s there? Satrius, Attend my honourable friend forth.—O! 60 How vain and vile a passion is this fear, What base uncomely things it makes men do! Suspect their noblest friends, as I did this, Flatter poor enemies, entreat their servants, Stoop, court, and catch at the benevolence 65 Of creatures unto whom, within this hour, I would not have vouchsaf’d a quarter-look, Or piece of face! By you that fools call gods, Hang all the sky with your prodigious signs, Fill earth with monsters, drop the scorpion down 70 Out of the zodiac, or the fiercer lion, Shake off the loos’ned globe from her long hinge, Roll all the world in darkness, and let loose Th’ enraged winds to turn up groves and towns! When I do fear again, let me be struck 75 With forked fire, and unpitied die; Who fears, is worthy of calamity. [Exit.]

[SCENE VII.][1539]

[Enter TERENTIUS, MINUTIUS, LACO, COTTA, LATIARIS, and] POMPONIUS; REGULUS, TRIO, [and others, on different sides.]

Pom. Is not my lord here?

Ter. Sir, he will be straight.

Cot. What news, Fulcinius Trio?

Tri. Good, good tidings; But keep it to yourself. My lord Sejanus Is to receive this day in open senate The tribunitial dignity.

Cot. Is’t true? 5

Tri. No words, not to your thought: but, sir, believe it.

Lat. What says the consul?

Cot. Speak it not again: He tells me that to-day my lord Sejanus——

Tri. I must entreat you, Cotta, on your honour Not to reveal it.

Cot. On my life, sir.

Lat. Say. 10

Cot. Is to receive the tribunitial power, But, as you are an honourable man, Let me conjure you not to utter it; For it is trusted to me with that bond.

Lat. I am Harpocrates.

Ter. Can you assure it? 15

Pom. The consul told it me; but keep it close.

Min. Lord Latiaris, what’s the news?

Lat. I’ll tell you; But you must swear to keep it secret.

[Enter] SEJANUS.

Sej. I knew the Fates had on their distaff left More of our thread, than so.

Reg. Hail, great Sejanus! 20

Tri. Hail, the most honour’d!

Cot. Happy!

Lat. High Sejanus!

Sej. Do you bring prodigies too?

Tri. May all presage Turn to those fair effects, whereof we bring Your lordship news.

Reg. May’t please my lord withdraw.

Sej. Yes:—I will speak with you anon.

To some that stand by.

Ter. My lord, 25 What is your pleasure for the tribunes?

Sej. Why, Let ’em be thankt and sent away.

Min. My lord——-

Lac. Will’t please your lordship to command me——-

Sej. No: You are troublesome.

Min. The mood is chang’d.

Tri. Not speak, Nor look!

Lac. Ay, he is wise, will make him friends Of such who never love but for their ends. [Exeunt.] 31

[SCENE VIII.][1540]

[Enter] ARRUNTIUS and LEPIDUS, divers other Senators passing by them.

Arr. Ay, go, make haste; take heed you be not last To tender your “All Hail” in the wide hall Of huge Sejanus: run a lictor’s pace: Stay not to put your robes on; but away With the pale troubled ensigns of great friendship 5 Stampt i’ your face! Now, Marcus Lepidus, You still believe your former augury? Sejanus must go downward! You perceive His wane approaching fast!

Lep. Believe me, Lucius, I wonder at this rising.

Arr. Ay, and that we 10 Must give our suffrage to it. You will say, It is to make his fall more steep and grievous. It may be so. But think it, they that can With idle wishes ’say[1541] to bring back time: In cases desperate, all hope is crime. 15 See, see! what troops of his officious friends Flock to salute my lord, and start before My great proud lord! to get a lord-like nod! Attend my lord unto the senate-house! 19 Bring back my lord! like servile ushers, make Way for my lord! proclaim his idol lordship, More than ten criers, or six noise of trumpets![1542] Make legs, kiss hands, and take a scatter’d hair From my lord’s eminent shoulder! See, Sanguinius, With his slow belly, and his dropsy! Look, 25 What toiling haste he makes! Yet here’s another Retarded with the gout, will be afore him. Get thee Liburnian porters, thou gross fool, To bear thy obsequious fatness, like thy peers. They met! The gout returns, and his great carriage. 30

Lictors, Consuls, [REGULUS and TRIO] SEJANUS, [SATRIUS, SANGUINIUS, HATERIUS, and many other Senators] pass over the stage.

Lict. Give way, make place, room for the consul!

San. Hail, Hail, great Sejanus!

Hat. Hail, my honour’d lord!

Arr. We shall be markt anon, for our not Hail.

Lep. That is already done.

Arr. It is a note, Of upstart greatness, to observe and watch 35 For these poor trifles, which the noble mind Neglects and scorns.

Lep. Ay, and they think themselves Deeply dishonour’d where they are omitted, As if they were necessities that helpt To the perfection of their dignities; 40 And hate the men that but refrain ’em.

Arr. O! There is a farther cause of hate. Their breasts Are guilty that we know their obscure springs And base beginnings; thence the anger grows. On. Follow. [Exeunt.] 45

[SCENE IX.][1543]

[Enter] MACRO and LACO.

Mac. When all are ent’red, shut the temple doors; And bring your guards up to the gate.

Lac. I will.

Mac. If you shall hear commotion in the senate, Present yourself: and charge on any man 4 Shall offer to come forth.

Lac. I am instructed. [Exeunt.]

[SCENE X.][1544]

The Senate.

HATERIUS, TRIO, SANGUINIUS, COTTA, REGULUS, SEJANUS, POMPONIUS, LATIARIS, LEPIDUS, ARRUNTIUS; Praecones, Lictores.

Hat. How well his lordship looks to-day!

Tri. As if He had been born, or made for this hour’s state.

Cot. Your fellow consul’s come about, methinks?

Tri. Ay, he is wise,

San. Sejanus trusts him well.

Tri. Sejanus is a noble, bounteous lord. 5

Hat. He is so, and most valiant.

Lat. And most wise.

[1] Sen. He’s everything.

Lat. Worthy of all, and more Than bounty can bestow.

Tri. This dignity Will make him worthy.

Pom. Above Caesar.

San. Tut, Caesar is but the rector of an isle, 10 He of the Empire.

Tri. Now he will have power More to reward than ever.

Cot. Let us look We be not slack in giving him our voices.

Lat. Not I.

San. Nor I.

Cot. The readier we seem To propagate his honours, will more bind 15 His thoughts to ours.

Hat. I think right with your lordship; It is the way to have us hold our places.

San. Ay, and get more.

Lat. More office and more titles.

Pom. I will not lose the part I hope to share In these his fortunes, for my patrimony. 20

Lat. See how Arruntius sits, and Lepidus!

Tri. Let ’em alone, they will be markt anon.

1 Sen. I’ll do with others.

2 Sen. So will I.

3 Sen. And I. Men grow not in the state but as they are planted Warm in his favours.

Cot. Noble Sejanus! 25

Hat. Honour’d Sejanus!

Lat. Worthy and great Sejanus!

Arr. Gods! how the sponges open and take in And shut again! Look, look! is not he blest That gets a seat in eye-reach of him! more That comes in ear, or tongue-reach? O but most 30 Can claw his subtile elbow, or with a buz Fly-bow his ears?

Praet. Proclaim the senate’s peace, And give last summons by the edict.

Prae. Silence! In the name of Caesar, and the senate, silence!

“Memmius Regulus, and Fulcinius Trio, (35) consuls, these present kalends of June, with the first light, shall hold a senate in the temple of Apollo Palatine: all that are fathers, and are regist’red fathers, that have right of ent’ring the senate, we warn or command you be frequently (40) present, take knowledge the business is the commonwealth’s: whosoever is absent, his fine or mulct will be taken, his excuse will not be taken.”

Tri. Note who are absent, and record their names. 45

Reg. Fathers conscript, may what I am to utter Turn good and happy for the commonwealth! And thou, Apollo, in whose holy house We here are met, inspire us all with truth, And liberty of censure to our thought! 50 The majesty of great Tiberius Caesar Propounds to this grave senate, the bestowing Upon the man he loves, honour’d Sejanus, The tribunitial dignity and power: Here are his letters, signed with his signet. 55 What pleaseth now the fathers to be done?

Sen. Read, read ’em, open, publicly read ’em.

Cot. Caesar hath honour’d his own greatness much In thinking of this act.

Tri. It was a thought Happy, and worthy Caesar.

Lat. And the lord 60 As worthy it, on whom it is directed!

Hat. Most worthy!

San. Rome did never boast the virtue That could give envy bounds, but his: Sejanus——

[1] Sen. Honour’d and noble!

[2] Sen. Good and great Sejanus! 64

Arr. O, most tame slavery, and fierce flattery!

Prae. Silence! (Reads.) “Tiberius Caesar to the Senate greeting. If you, conscript fathers, with your children, be in health, it is abundantly well: we with our friends here are so. The care of the commonwealth, howsoever we are remov’d in person, (70) cannot be absent to our thought: although, oftentimes, even to princes most present, the truth of their own affairs is hid; than which nothing falls out more miserable to a state, or makes the art of governing more difficult. (75) But since it hath been our easeful happiness to enjoy both the aids and industry of so vigilant a senate, we profess to have been the more indulgent to our pleasures, not as being careless of our office, but rather secure of the necessity. Neither do these common rumours of many, (81) and infamous libels published against our retirement, at all afflict us; being born more out of men’s ignorance than their malice: and will, neglected, find their own grave quickly; 85 whereas, too sensibly acknowledge, it would make their obloquy ours. Nor do we desire their authors, though found, be censur’d, since in a free state, as ours, all men ought to enjoy both their minds and tongues free.” 90

Arr. (Aside). The lapwing, the lapwing! “Yet in things which shall worthily and more near concern the majesty of a prince, we shall fear to be so unnaturally cruel to our own fame, as to neglect them. True it is, conscript fathers, that we have raised Sejanus from obscure, (96) and almost unknown gentry,”

Sen. (Aside.) How, how! “to the highest and most conspicuous point of greatness, and, we hope, deservingly; yet (100) not without danger: it being a most bold hazard in that sov’reign who, by his particular love to one, dares adventure the hatred of all his other subjects.”

Arr. (Aside.) This touches; the blood turns. “But we affy[1545] in your loves and understandings, (106) and do no way suspect the merit of our Sejanus, to make our favours offensive to any.”

Sen. (Aside.) O! good, good. 110 “Though we could have wished his zeal had run a calmer course against Agrippina and our nephews, howsoever the openness of their actions declared them delinquents; and that he would have rememb’red no innocence is so (115) safe, but it rejoiceth to stand in the sight of mercy: the use of which in us he hath so quite taken away toward them, by his loyal fury, as now our clemency would be thought but wearied cruelty, if we should offer to exercise it.”

Arr. (Aside.) I thank him; there I look’d for ’t. A good fox! 121 “Some there be that would interpret this his public severity to be particular ambition; and that, under a pretext of service to us, he doth but remove his own lets:[1546] alleging the (125) strengths he hath made to himself, by the praetorian soldiers, by his faction in court and senate, by the offices he holds himself, and confers on others, his popularity and dependents, his urging and almost driving us to this our unwilling (130) retirement, and, lastly, his aspiring to be our son-in-law.”

Sen. (Aside.) This is strange!

Arr. (Aside.) I shall anon believe your vultures,[1547] Marcus.

“Your wisdoms, conscript fathers, are able (135) to examine, and censure[1548] these suggestions. But were they left to our absolving voice, we durst pronounce them, as we think them, most malicious.”

Sen. (Aside.) O, he has restor’d all, list! 140

“Yet are they offer’d to be averr’d, and on the lives of the informers. What we should say, or rather what we should not say, lords of the senate, if this be true, our gods and goddesses confound us if we know! Only we must think, (145) we have plac’d our benefits ill; and conclude, that in our choice, either we were wanting to the gods, or the gods to us.” The Senators shift their places.

Arr. (Aside.) The place grows hot; they shift.

“We have not been covetous, honourable (150) fathers, to change; neither is it now any new lust that alters our affection, or old loathing: but those needful jealousies of state, that warn wiser princes hourly to provide their safety; and do teach them how learned a thing it is (155) to beware of the humblest enemy; much more of those great ones, whom their own employ’d favours have made fit for their fears.”

[1] Sen. (Aside.) Away.

[2] Sen. (Aside.) Sit farther.

Cot. (Aside.) Let’s remove——

Arr. (Aside.) Gods! how the leaves drop off, this little wind! 160

“We therefore desire, that the offices he holds be first seized by the senate; and himself suspended from all exercise of place or power——”

Sen. (Aside.) How! 165

San. [Thrusting by.] By your leave.

Arr. Come, porpoise. (Aside.) Where’s Haterius? His gout keeps him most miserably constant!— Your dancing shows a tempest.

Sej. Read no more.

Reg. Lords of the senate, hold your seats: read on.

Sej. These letters, they are forg’d.

Reg. A guard! sit still. 170

Enter LACO, with the Guards.

Arr. There’s change!

Reg. Bid silence, and read forward.

Prae. Silence!—“and himself suspended from all exercise of place or power, but till due and mature trial be made of his innocency, which yet we can faintly apprehend the necessity to (175) doubt. If, conscript fathers, to your more searching wisdoms, there shall appear farther cause—or of farther proceeding, either to seizure of lands, goods, or more—it is not our power that shall limit your authority, or our favour (180) that must corrupt your justice: either were dishonourable in you, and both uncharitable to ourself. We would willingly be present with your counsels in this business; but the danger of so potent a faction, if it should prove (185) so, forbids our attempting it: except one of the consuls would be entreated for our safety, to undertake the guard of us home; then we should most readily adventure. In the meantime, it shall not be fit for us to importune (190) so judicious a senate, who know how much they hurt the innocent that spare the guilty; and how grateful a sacrifice to the gods is the life of an ingrateful person. We reflect not in this on Sejanus, (notwithstanding, if you (195) keep an eye upon him—and there is Latiaris, a senator, and Pinnarius Natta, two of his most trusted ministers; and so profest, whom we desire not to have apprehended,) but as the necessity of the cause exacts it.” 200

Reg. A guard on Latiaris!

Arr. O, the spy. The reverend spy is caught! Who pities him? Reward, sir, for your service: now, you ha’ done Your property.[1549] you see what use is made! [Exeunt LATIARIS and NATTA guarded.] Hang up the instrument.

Sej. Give leave.

Lac. Stand, stand! 206 He comes upon his death, that doth advance An inch toward my point.

Sej. Have we no friends here?

Arr. Husht! Where now are all the hails and acclamations?

[Enter] MACRO.

Mac. Hail to the consuls, and this noble senate!

Sej. [Aside.] Is Macro here? O, thou art lost, Sejanus! 210

Mac. Sit still, and unaffrighted, reverend fathers; Macro, by Caesar’s grace the new-made provost, And now possest of the praetorian bands, An honour late belong’d to that proud man, Bids you be safe: and to your constant doom[1550] 215 Of his deservings, offers you the surety Of all the soldiers, tribunes, and centurions, Receiv’d in our command.

Reg. Sejanus, Sejanus, Stand forth, Sejanus!

Sej. Am I call’d!

Mac. Ay, thou, Thou insolent monster, art bid stand.

Sej. Why, Macro, 220 It hath been otherwise between you and I; This court, that knows us both, hath seen a difference, And can, if it be pleas’d to speak, confirm Whose insolence is most.

Mac. Come down, Typhoeus. If mine be most, lo! thus I make it more; 225 Kick up thy heels in air, tear off thy robe, Play with thy beard and nostrils. Thus ’t is fit (And no man take compassion of thy state) To use th’ ingrateful viper, tread his brains Into the earth.

Reg. Forbear.

Mac. If I could lose 230 All my humanity now, ’t were well to torture So meriting a traitor.—Wherefore, fathers, Sit you amaz’d and silent; and not censure This wretch, who, in the hour he first rebell’d ’Gainst Caesar’s bounty, did condemn himself? Phlegra, the field where all the sons of earth Muster’d against the gods, did ne’er acknowledge 237 So proud and huge a monster.

Reg. Take him hence; And all the gods guard Caesar!

Tri. Take him hence.

Hat. Hence.

Cot. To the dungeon with him.

San. He deserves it. 240

Sen. Crown all our doors with bays.

San. And let an ox, With gilded horns and garlands, straight be led Unto the Capitol.

Hat. And sacrific’d To Jove, for Caesar’s safety.

Tri. All our gods Be present still to Caesar!

Cot. Phoebus.

San. Mars. 244

Hat. Diana.

San. Pallas.

Sen. Juno, Mercury, All guard him!

Mac. Forth thou prodigy of men. [Exit SEJANUS, guarded.]

Cot. Let all the traitor’s titles be defac’d.

Tri. His images and statues be pull’d down.

Hat. His chariot-wheels be broken.

Arr. And the legs Of the poor horses, that deserved nought, 251 Let them be broken too!

Lep. O violent change, And whirl of men’s affections!

Arr. Like, as both Their bulks and souls were bound on Fortune’s wheel, And must act only with her motion. 255 [Exeunt all but] LEPIDUS and ARRUNTIUS.

Lep. Who would depend upon the popular air, Or voice of men, that have to-day beheld That which, if all the gods had fore-declar’d, Would not have been believ’d Sejanus’ fall? He that this morn rose proudly as the sun, 260 And, breaking through a mist of clients’ breath, Came on as gaz’d at and admir’d as he, When superstitious Moors salute his light! That had our servile nobles waiting him As common grooms; and hanging on his look No less than human life on destiny! 265 That had men’s knees as frequent as the gods; And sacrifices more than Rome had altars: And this man fall! fall? ay, without a look That durst appear his friend, or lend so much Of vain relief, to his chang’d state, as pity! 271

Arr. They that before, like gnats, play’d in his beams, And throng’d to circumscribe him, now not seen, Nor deign to hold a common seat with him! Others, that waited him unto the senate, 275 Now inhumanely ravish him to prison, Whom but this morn they follow’d as their lord! Guard through the streets, bound like a fugitive. Instead of wreaths give fetters, strokes for stoops: Blind shame for honours, and black taunts for titles! 280 Who would trust slippery Chance?

Lep. They that would make Themselves her spoil; and foolishly forget, When she doth flatter, that she comes to prey. Fortune, thou hadst no deity, if men Had wisdom: we have placed thee so high, 285 By fond belief in thy felicity. (Shout within.) The gods guard Caesar! All the gods guard Caesar!

[Re-enter MACRO,] REGULUS, [and divers], Senators.

Mac. Now, great Sejanus, you that aw’d the state, And sought to bring the nobles to your whip; That would be Caesar’s tutor, and dispose 290 Of dignities and offices! that had The public head still bare to your designs, And made the general voice to echo yours! That look’d for salutations twelve score off, And would have pyramids, yea, temples, rear’d To your huge greatness; now you lie as flat 295 As was your pride advanc’d![1551]

Reg. Thanks to the gods!

Sen. And praise to Macro, that hath saved Rome! Liberty, liberty, liberty! Lead on, And praise to Macro, that hath saved Rome! 300 [Exeunt all but] ARRUNTIUS and LEPIDUS.

Arr. I prophesy, out of the senate’s flattery, That this new fellow, Macro, will become A greater prodigy in Rome than he That now is fall’n.

[Enter TERENTIUS.]

Ter. O you, whose minds are good, And have not forc’d all mankind from your breasts; 305 That yet have so much stock of virtue left To pity guilty states, when they are wretched: Lend your soft ears to hear, and eyes to weep Deeds done by men, beyond the acts of furies. The eager multitude (who never yet 310 Knew why to love or hate, but only pleas’d T’ express their rage of power) no sooner heard The murmur of Sejanus in decline, But with that speed and heat of appetite, With which they greedily devour the way 315 To some great sports, or a new theatre, They fill’d the Capitol, and Pompey’s Cirque Where, like so many mastiffs biting stones, As if his statues now were sensitive 319 Of their wild fury; first, they tear them down; Then fast’ning ropes, drag them along the streets, Crying in scorn, “This, this was that rich head Was crown’d with garlands, and with odours, this That was in Rome so reverenced! Now The furnace and the bellows shall to work, 325 The great Sejanus crack, and piece by piece Drop in the founder’s pit.”

Lep. O popular rage!

Ter. The whilst the senate at the temple of Concord Make haste to meet again, and thronging cry, “Let us condemn him, tread him down in water, While he doth lie upon the bank; away!” 331 While some, more tardy, cry unto their bearers, “He will be censur’d ere we come; run, knaves,” And use that furious diligence, for fear Their bondmen should inform against their slackness, 335 And bring their quaking flesh unto the hook. The rout, they follow with confused voice, Crying they’re glad, say they could ne’er abide him; Inquire what man he was, what kind of face, What beard he had, what nose, what lips? protest 340 They ever did presage he’d come to this; They never thought him wise, nor valiant; ask After his garments, when he dies, what death; And not a beast of all the herd demands What was his crime, or who were his accusers, Under what proof or testimony he fell. 346 There came, says one, a huge long-worded letter From Capreae against him. Did there so? O, they are satisfied; no more.

Lep. Alas! They follow Fortune, and hate men condemn’d, Guilty or not.

Arr. But had Sejanus thriv’d 351 In his design, and prosperously opprest The old Tiberius; then, in that same minute, These very rascals, that now rage like furies, Would have proclaim’d Sejanus emperor. 355

Lep. But what hath follow’d?

Ter. Sentence by the senate, To lose his head; which was no sooner off, But that and th’ unfortunate trunk were seiz’d By the rude multitude; who not content With what the forward justice of the state 360 Officiously had done, with violent rage Have rent it limb from limb. A thousand heads, A thousand hands, ten thousand tongues and voices, Employ’d at once in several acts of malice! Old men not staid with age, virgins with shame, Late wives with loss of husbands, mothers of children, 366 Losing all grief in joy of his sad fall, Run quite transported with their cruelty! These mounting at his head, these at his face, These digging out his eyes, those with his brain Sprinkling themselves, their houses and their friends; 371 Others are met, have ravish’d thence an arm, And deal small pieces of the flesh for favours; These with a thigh, this hath cut off his hands, And this his feet; these fingers, and these toes; 375 That hath his liver, he his heart: there wants Nothing but room for wrath, and place for hatred! What cannot oft be done, is now o’erdone. The whole, and all of what was great Sejanus, And, next to Caesar, did possess the world, 380 Now torn and scatter’d, as he needs no grave Each little dust covers a little part: So lies he nowhere, and yet often buried!

[Enter] NUNTIUS.

Arr. More of Sejanus?

Nun. Yes.

Lep. What can be added? We know him dead.

Nun. Then there begin your pity, 385 There is enough behind to melt ev’n Rome, And Caesar into tears; since never slave Could yet so highly offend, but tyranny, In tormenting him, would make him worth lamenting. A son and daughter to the dead Sejanus, 390 (Of whom there is not now so much remaining As would give fast’ning to the hangman’s hook,) Have they drawn forth for farther sacrifice; Whose tenderness of knowledge, unripe years, And childish silly innocence was such, 395 As scarce would lend them feeling of their danger: The girl so simple, as she often askt Where they would lead her? for what cause they dragg’d her? Cried, she would do no more: that she could take Warning with beating. And because our laws 400 Admit no virgin immature to die, The wittily and strangely cruel Macro Deliver’d her to be deflower’d and spoil’d By the rude lust of the licentious hangman, 404 Then to be strangled with her harmless brother.

Lep. O, act most worthy hell, and lasting night, To hide it from the world!

Nun. Their bodies thrown Into the Gemonies, (I know not how, Or by what accident return’d,) the mother, Th’ expulsed[1552] Apicata, finds them there; 410 Whom when she saw lie spread on the degrees,[1553] After a world of fury on herself, Tearing her hair, defacing of her face, Beating her breasts and womb, kneeling amaz’d, Crying to heaven, then to them; at last, 415 Her drowned voice gat up above her woes, And with such black and bitter execrations As might affright the gods, and force the sun Run backward to the east; nay, make the old Deformed chaos rise again, t’ o’erwhelm 420 Them, us, and all the world, she fills the air, Upbraids the heavens with their partial dooms, Defies their tyrannous powers, and demands, What she, and those poor innocents have transgress’d, That they must suffer such a share in vengeance, 425 Whilst Livia, Lygdus, and Eudemus live, Who, as she says, and firmly vows to prove it To Caesar and the senate, poison’d Drusus?

Lep. Confederates with her husband!

Nun. Ay.

Lep. Strange act!

Arr. And strangely open’d. What says now my monster, 430 The multitude? They reel now, do they not?

Nun. Their gall is gone, and now they ’gin to weep The mischief they have done.

Arr. I thank ’em, rogues.

Nun. Part are so stupid, or so flexible, As they believe him innocent; all grieve: 435 And some, whose hands yet reek with his warm blood, And grip the part which they did tear of him, Wish him collected and created new.

Lep. How Fortune plies her sports, when she begins To practise ’em! pursues, continues, adds, 440 Confounds with varying her impassion’d moods!

Arr. Dost thou hope, Fortune, to redeem thy crimes, To make amend for thy ill placed favours, With these strange punishments! Forbear, you things That stand upon the pinnacles of state, 445 To boast your slippery height; when you do fall, You pash[1554] yourselves in pieces, ne’er to rise; And he that lends you pity, is not wise.

Ter. Let this example move the insolent man Not to grow proud and careless of the gods. 450 It is an odious wisdom to blaspheme, Much more to slighten, or deny their powers: For whom the morning saw so great and high, Thus low and little, ’fore the even doth lie. [Exeunt.]

VOLPONE; OR, THE FOX

BY BEN JONSON

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The Persons of the Play

VOLPONE, a Magnifico. MOSCA, his Parasite. VOLTORE, an Advocate. CORBACCIO, an old Gentleman. CORVINO, a Merchant. BONARIO, a young Gentleman, [son to Corbaccio.] [SIR] POLITIC WOULD-BE, a Knight. PEREGRINE, a Gentleman Traveller. NANO, a Dwarf. CASTRONE, an Eunuch. ANDROGYNO, an Hermaphrodite.

Grege [or Mob]. Commandadori, Officers [of Justice.] Mercatori, three Merchants. Avocatori, four Magistrates. Notario, the Register.

Fine Madame WOULD-BE, the Knight’s Wife. CELIA, [Corvino] the Merchant’s Wife.

Servitore, a Servant, [two Waiting-] women, &c.

SCENE.—Venice.

THE ARGUMENT

V olpone, childless, rich, feigns sick, despairs, O ffers his state to hopes of several heirs, L ies languishing: his parasite receives P resents of all, assures, deludes; then weaves O ther cross plots, which ope themselves, are told. 5 N ew tricks for safety are sought; they thrive: when, bold, E ach tempts th’ other again, and all are sold.

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Prologue

Now, luck yet send us, and a little wit Will serve to make our play hit; According to the palates of the season, Here is rhyme, not empty of reason. This we were bid to credit from our poet, 5 Whose true scope, if you would know it, In all his poems still hath been this measure, To mix profit with your pleasure; And not as some, whose throats their envy failing, Cry hoarsely, “All he writes is railing:” 10 And when his plays come forth, think they can flout them, With saying, he was a year about them. To this there needs no lie, but this his creature, Which was two months since no feature: And though he dares give them five lives to mend it, 15 ’T is known, five weeks fully penn’d it, From his own hand, without a coadjutor, Novice, journeyman, or tutor. Yet thus much I can give you as a token Of his play’s worth, no eggs are broken, 20 Nor quaking custards with fierce teeth affrighted, Wherewith your rout are so delighted; Nor hales he in a gull, old ends reciting, To stop gaps in his loose writing; With such a deal of monstrous and forc’d action, 25 As might make Bethlem[1555] a faction: Nor made he his play for jests stol’n from each table, But makes jests to fit his fable; And so presents quick comedy refin’d, As best critics have design’d; 30 The laws of time, place, persons he observeth, From no needful rule he swerveth. All gall and copperas[1556] from his ink he draineth, Only a little salt remaineth, Wherewith he ’ll rub your cheeks, till, red with laughter, 35 They shall look fresh a week after.

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Act I, Scene I — [1557]

[Enter] VOLPONE, MOSCA.

Volp. Good morning to the day; and next, my gold! Open the shrine, that I may see my saint.

[MOSCA withdraws the curtain, and discovers piles of gold, plate, jewels, etc.]

Hail the world’s soul, and mine! More glad than is The teeming earth to see the long’d-for sun Peep through the horns of the celestial Ram, 5 Am I, to view thy splendour dark’ning his; That lying here, amongst my other hoards, Show’st like a flame by night, or like the day Struck out of chaos, when all darkness fled Unto the centre.[1558] O thou son of Sol, 10 But brighter than thy father, let me kiss, With adoration, thee, and every relic Of sacred treasure in this blessed room. Well did wise poets, by thy glorious name, Title that age which they would have the best; Thou being the best of things, and far transcending 16 All style of joy, in children, parents, friends, Or any other waking dream on earth Thy looks when they to Venus did ascribe, They should have given her twenty thousand Cupids; 20 Such are thy beauties and our loves! Dear saint, Riches, the dumb god, that giv’st all men tongues, That canst do nought, and yet mak’st men do all things; The price of souls; even hell, with thee to boot, 24 Is made worth heaven. Thou art virtue, fame, Honour, and all things else. Who can get thee, He shall be noble, valiant, honest, wise——[1559]

Mos. And what he will, sir. Riches are in fortune A greater good than wisdom is in nature.

Volp. True, my beloved Mosca. Yet I glory More in the cunning purchase of my wealth, 31 Than in the glad possession, since I gain No common way; I use no trade, no venture; I wound no earth with ploughshares, I fat no beasts To feed the shambles; have no mills for iron, 35 Oil, corn, or men, to grind them into powder; I blow no subtle glass, expose no ships To threat’nings of the furrow-faced sea; I turn no monies in the public bank, No usure private.

Mos. No, sir, nor devour 40 Soft prodigals. You shall ha’ some will swallow A melting heir as glibly as your Dutch Will pills of butter, and ne’er purge for it; Tear forth the fathers of poor families Out of their beds, and coffin them alive 45 In some kind clasping prison, where their bones May be forthcoming, when the flesh is rotten: But your sweet nature doth abhor these courses; You loathe the widow’s or the orphan’s tears Should wash your pavements, or their piteous cries 50 Ring in your roofs, and beat the air for vengeance.

Volp. Right, Mosca; I do loathe it.

Mos. And, besides, sir, You are not like the thresher that doth stand With a huge flail, watching a heap of corn, 54 And, hungry, dares not taste the smallest grain, But feeds on mallows, and such bitter herbs; Nor like the merchant, who hath fill’d his vaults With Romagnia, rich and Candian wines, Yet drinks the lees of Lombard’s vinegar: You will not lie in straw, whilst moths and worms 60 Feed on your sumptuous hangings and soft beds; You know the use of riches, and dare give now From that bright heap, to me, your poor observer, Or to your dwarf, or your hermaphrodite, Your eunuch, or what other household trifle 65 Your pleasure allows maintenance—

Vol. Hold thee, Mosca, Take of my hand; thou strik’st on truth in all, And they are envious term thee parasite. Call forth my dwarf, my eunuch, and my fool, And let ’em make me sport. [Exit MOS.] What should I do, 70 But cocker up my genius, and live free To all delights my fortune calls me to? I have no wife, no parent, child, ally, To give my substance to; but whom I make Must be my heir; and this makes men observe[1560] me: 75 This draws new clients daily to my house, Women and men of every sex and age, That bring me presents, send me plate, coin, jewels, With hope that when I die (which they expect Each greedy minute) it shall then return 80 Tenfold upon them; whilst some, covetous Above the rest, seek to engross me whole, And counter-work the one unto the other, Contend in gifts, as they would seem in love: All which I suffer, playing with their hopes, 85 And am content to coin ’em into profit, And look upon their kindness, and take more, And look on that; still bearing them in hand,[1561] Letting the cherry knock against their lips, And draw it by their mouths, and back again.— How now! 91

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Act I, Scene II — [1562]

[To him re-enter] MOSCA, [with] NANO, ANDROGYNO, and CASTRONE.

Nan. “Now, room for fresh gamesters, who do will you to know, They do bring you neither play nor university show; And therefore do intreat you that whatsoever they rehearse, May not fare a whit the worse, for the false pace of the verse. If you wonder at this, you will wonder more ere we pass, 5 For know, here[1563] is inclos’d the soul of Pythagoras, That juggler divine, as hereafter shall follow; Which soul, fast and loose, sir, came first from Apollo, And was breath’d into Aethalides, Mercurius his son, Where it had the gift to remember all that ever was done. 10 From thence it fled forth, and made quick transmigration To goldy-lock’d Euphorbus, who was kill’d in good fashion, At the siege of old Troy, by the cuckold of Sparta. Hermotimus was next (I find it in my charta), To whom it did pass, where no sooner it was missing, 15 But with one Pyrrhus of Delos it learn’d to go a-fishing; And thence did it enter the sophist of Greece. From Pythagore, she went into a beautiful piece, Hight Aspasia, the meretrix; and the next toss of her Was again of a whore, she became a philosopher, Crates the cynick, as itself doth relate it: 21 Since kings, knights, and beggars, knaves, lords, and fools gat it, Besides ox and ass, camel, mule, goat, and brock,[1564] In all which it hath spoke, as in the cobbler’s cock.[1565] 24 But I come not here to discourse of that matter, Or his one, two, or three, or his great oath, BY QUATER![1566] His musics, his trigon,[1567] his golden thigh, Or his telling how elements shift; but I Would ask, how of late thou hast suffer’d translation, And shifted thy coat in these days of reformation. 30

And. Like one of the reform’d, a fool, as you see, Counting all old doctrine heresy.

Nan. But not on thine own forbid meats hast thou ventur’d?

And. On fish, when first a Carthusian I enter’d.

Nan. Why, then thy dogmatical silence hath left thee? 35

And. Of that an obstreperous lawyer bereft me.

Nan. O wonderful change, when sir lawyer forsook thee! For Pythagore’s sake, what body then took thee?

And. A good dull mule.

Nan. And how! by that means Thou wert brought to allow of the eating of beans? 40

And. Yes.

Nan. But from the mule into whom didst thou pass?

And. Into a very strange beast, by some writers call’d an ass; By others a precise,[1568] pure, illuminate brother Of those devour flesh, and sometimes one another; And will drop you forth a libel, or a sanctifi’d lie, Betwixt every spoonful of a nativity-pie.[1569] 46

Nan. Now quit thee, for heaven, of that profane nation, And gently report thy next transmigration.

And. To the same that I am.

Nan. A creature of delight, And, what is more than a fool, an hermaphrodite! 50 Now, prithee, sweet soul, in all thy variation, Which body wouldst thou choose to keep up thy station?

And. Troth, this I am in: even here would I tarry.

Nan. ’Cause here the delight of each sex thou canst vary?

And. Alas, those pleasures be stale and forsaken; 55 No, ’t is your fool wherewith I am so taken, The only one creature that I can call blessed; For all other forms I have prov’d most distressed.

Nan. Spoke true, as thou wert in Pythagoras still. This learned opinion we celebrate will, 60 Fellow eunuch, as behoves us, with all our wit and art, To dignify that whereof ourselves are so great and special a part.”

Volp. Now, very, very pretty! Mosca, this Was thy invention?

Mos. If it please my patron, Not else.

Volp. It doth, good Mosca.

Mos. Then it was, sir. 65

[NANO and CASTRONE sing.]

Song.

“Fools, they are the only nation Worth men’s envy or admiration; Free from care or sorrow-taking, Selves and others merry making: All they speak or do is sterling. 70 Your fool he is your great man’s darling, And your ladies’ sport and pleasure; Tongue and bauble are his treasure. E’en his face begetteth laughter, And he speaks truth free from slaughter;[1570] 75 He’s the grace of every feast, And sometimes the chiefest guest; Hath his trencher and his stool, When wit waits upon the fool. O, who would not be 80 He, he, he?” One knocks without.

Volp. Who ’s that? Away! Look, Mosca. Fool, begone! [Exeunt NANO, CAST. and ANDRO.]

Mos. ’T is Signior Voltore, the advocate; I know him by his knock.

Volp. Fetch me my gown, My furs, and night-caps; say my couch is changing 85 And let him entertain himself awhile Without i’ th’ gallery. [Exit MOSCA.] Now, now my clients Begin their visitation! Vulture, kite, Raven, and gorcrow,[1571] all my birds of prey, 89 That think me turning carcase, now they come: I am not for ’em yet. [Re-enter MOSCA, with the gown, etc.] How now! the news?

Mos. A piece of plate, sir.

Volp. Of what bigness?

Mos. Huge, Massy, and antique, with your name inscrib’d, And arms engraven.

Volp. Good! and not a fox 94 Stretcht on the earth, with fine delusive sleights, Mocking a gaping crow? ha, Mosca!

Mos. Sharp, sir.

Volp. Give me my furs. [Puts on his sick dress.] Why dost thou laugh so, man?

Mos. I cannot choose, sir, when I apprehend What thoughts he has without now, as he walks: 99 That this might be the last gift he should give, That this would fetch you; if you died to-day, And gave him all, what he should be to-morrow; What large return would come of all his ventures; 103 How he should worshipp’d be, and reverenc’d; Ride with his furs, and foot cloths; waited on By herds of fools and clients; have clear way Made for his mule, as letter’d as himself; Be call’d the great and learned advocate: 108 And then concludes, there’s nought impossible.

Volp. Yes, to be learned, Mosca.

Mos. O, no: rich Implies it. Hood an ass with reverend purple, So you can hide his two ambitious[1572] ears, And he shall pass for a cathedral doctor.

Volp. My caps, my caps, good Mosca. Fetch him in. 114

Mos. Stay, sir; your ointment for your eyes.

Volp. That ’s true; Dispatch, dispatch: I long to have possession Of my new present.

Mos. That, and thousands more, I hope to see you lord of.

Volp. Thanks, kind Mosca.

Mos. And that, when I am lost in blended dust, And hundreds such as I am, in succession— 120

Volp. Nay, that were too much, Mosca.

Mos. You shall live Still to delude these harpies.

Volp. Loving Mosca! ’T is well: my pillow now, and let him enter.

[Exit MOSCA.]

Now, my feign’d cough, my phthisic, and my gout, My apoplexy, palsy, and catarrhs, 125 Help, with your forced functions, this my posture, Wherein, this three year, I have milk’d their hopes. He comes; I hear him—Uh! [coughing] uh! uh! uh! O——

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Act I, Scene III — [1573]

VOLPONE; [re-enter MOSCA, [introducing] VOLTORE [with a piece of plate.]

Mos. You still are what you were, sir. Only you, Of all the rest, are he commands his love, And you do wisely to preserve it thus, With early visitation, and kind notes Of your good meaning to him, which, I know, 5 Cannot but come most grateful. Patron! sir! Here’s Signior Voltore is come——

Volp. [Faintly.] What say you?

Mos. Sir, Signior Voltore is come this morning To visit you.

Volp. I thank him.

Mos. And hath brought A piece of antique plate, bought of St. Mark,[1574] With which he here presents you.

Volp. He is welcome. 11 Pray him to come more often.

Mos. Yes.

Volt. What says he?

Mos. He thanks you, and desires you see him often.

Volp. Mosca.

Mos. My patron!

Volp. Bring him near, where is he? I long to feel his hand.

Mos. The plate is here, sir. 15

Volt. How fare you, sir?

Volp. I thank you, Signior Voltore; Where is the plate? mine eyes are bad.

Volt. [putting it into his hands.] I’m sorry To see you still thus weak.

Mos. [Aside.] That he’s not weaker.

Volp. You are too munificent.

Volt. No, sir; would to heaven I could as well give health to you, as that plate! 20

Volp. You give, sir, what you can; I thank you. Your love Hath taste in this, and shall not be unanswer’d: I pray you see me often.

Volt. Yes, I shall, sir.

Volp. Be not far from me.

Mos. Do you observe that, sir?

Volp. Hearken unto me still; it will concern you. 25

Mos. You are a happy man, sir; know your good.

Volp. I cannot now last long——

Mos. (Aside.) You are his heir, sir.

Volt. (Aside.) Am I?

Volp. I feel me going: Uh! uh! uh! uh! I’m sailing to my port. Uh! uh! uh! uh! And I am glad I am so near my haven. 30

Mos. Alas, kind gentleman! Well, we must all go——

Volt. But, Mosca——

Mos. Age will conquer.

Volt. Prithee, hear me; Am I inscrib’d his heir for certain?

Mos. Are you! I do beseech you, sir, you will vouchsafe To write me i’ your family. All my hopes 35 Depend upon your worship: I am lost Except the rising sun do shine on me.

Volt. It shall both shine, and warm thee, Mosca.

Mos. Sir, I am a man that hath not done your love All the worst offices: here I wear your keys, 40 See all your coffers and your caskets lock’d, Keep the poor inventory of your jewels, Your plate, and monies; am your steward, sir, Husband your goods here.

Volt. But am I sole heir?

Mos. Without a partner, sir: confirm’d this morning: 45 The wax is warm yet, and the ink scarce dry Upon the parchment.

Volt. Happy, happy me! By what good chance, sweet Mosca?

Mos. Your desert, sir; I know no second cause.

Volt. Thy modesty Is loth to know it; well, we shall requite it. 50

Mos. He ever lik’d your course, sir; that first took him. I oft have heard him say how he admir’d Men of your large profession, that could speak To every cause, and things mere contraries, Till they were hoarse again, yet all be law; 55 That, with most quick agility, could turn, And return;[1575] make knots, and undo them; Give forked counsel; take provoking gold On either hand, and put it up; these men, He knew, would thrive with their humility, 60 And, for his part, he thought he should be blest To have his heir of such a suff’ring spirit, So wise, so grave, of so perplex’d a tongue, And loud withal, that would not wag, nor scarce Lie still, without a fee; when every word 65 Your worship but lets fall, is a chequin!— Another knocks. Who’s that? one knocks; I would not have you seen, sir. And yet—pretend you came and went in haste; I’ll fashion an excuse—and, gentle sir, When you do come to swim in golden lard, 70 Up to the arms in honey, that your chin Is borne up stiff with fatness of the flood, Think on your vassal; but remember me: I ha’ not been your worst of clients.

Volt. Mosca!——

Mos. When will you have your inventory brought, sir? 75 Or see a copy of the will?—Anon! I ’ll bring them to you, sir. Away, begone. Put business i’ your face. [Exit VOLTORE.]

Volp. [Springing up.] Excellent Mosca! Come hither, let me kiss thee.

Mos. Keep you still, sir, Here is Corbaccio.

Volp. Set the plate away: 80 The vulture’s gone, and the old raven’s come.

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Act I, Scene IV — [1576]

MOSCA, VOLPONE.

Mos. Betake you to your silence, and your sleep. Stand there and multiply. [Putting the plate to the rest.] Now we shall see A wretch who is indeed more impotent Than this can feign to be; yet hopes to hop Over his grave. [Enter CORBACCIO.] Signior Corbaccio! 5 You’re very welcome, sir.

Corb. How does your patron?

Mos. Troth, as he did, sir; no amends.

Corb. What! mends he?

Mos. No, sir: he ’s rather worse.

Corb. That ’s well. Where is he?

Mos. Upon his couch, sir, newly fall’n asleep.

Corb. Does he sleep well?

Mos. No wink, sir, all this night, 10 Nor yesterday; but slumbers.

Corb. Good! he should take Some counsel of physicians: I have brought him An opiate here, from mine own doctor.

Mos. He will not hear of drugs.

Corb. Why? I myself Stood by while ’t was made, saw all th’ ingredients; 15 And know it cannot but most gently work: My life for his, ’t is but to make him sleep.

Volp. [Aside.] Ay, his last sleep, if he would take it.

Mos. Sir, He has no faith in physic.

Corb. Say you, say you?

Mos. He has no faith in physic: he does think 20 Most of your doctors are the greater danger, And worse disease, t’ escape. I often have Heard him protest that your physician Should never be his heir.

Corb. Not I his heir?

Mos. Not your physician, sir.

Corb. O, no, no, no, 25 I do not mean it.

Mos. No, sir, nor their fees He cannot brook; he says they flay a man Before they kill him.

Corb. Right, I do conceive you.

Mos. And then they do it by experiment; For which the law not only doth absolve ’em, But gives them great reward: and he is loth 31 To hire his death so.

Corb. It is true, they kill With as much licence as a judge.

Mos. Nay, more; For he but kills, sir, where the law condemns, And these can kill him too.

Corb. Ay, or me; 35 Or any man. How does his apoplex? Is that strong on him still?

Mos. Most violent. His speech is broken, and his eyes are set, His face drawn longer than ’t was wont——

Corb. How! how! Stronger than he was wont?

Mos. No, sir; his face 40 Drawn longer than ’t was wont.

Corb. O, good!

Mos. His mouth Is ever gaping, and his eyelids hang.

Corb. Good.

Mos. A freezing numbness stiffens all his joints, And makes the colour of his flesh like lead.

Corb. ’T is good.

Mos. His pulse beats slow, and dull.

Corb. Good symptoms still. 45

Mos. And from his brain——

Corb. Ha? How? Not from his brain?

Mos. Yes, sir, and from his brain—

Corb. I conceive you; good.

Mos. Flows a cold sweat, with a continual rheum, Forth the resolved corners of his eyes.

Corb. Is ’t possible? Yet I am better, ha! 50 How does he with the swimming of his head?

Mos. O, sir, ’t is past the scotomy;[1577] he now Hath lost his feeling, and hath left to snort: You hardly can perceive him, that he breathes.

Corb. Excellent, excellent! sure I shall outlast him: 55 This makes me young again, a score of years.

Mos. I was a-coming for you, sir.

Corb. Has he made his will? What has he giv’n me?

Mos. No, sir.

Corb. Nothing! ha?

Mos. He has not made his will, sir.

Corb. Oh, oh, oh! What then did Voltore, the lawyer, here? 60

Mos. He smelt a carcase, sir, when he but heard My master was about his testament; As I did urge him to it for your good——

Corb. He came unto him, did he? I thought so.

Mos. Yes, and presented him this piece of plate. 65

Corb. To be his heir?

Mos. I do not know, sir.

Corb. True: I know it too.

Mos. [Aside.] By your own scale, sir.

Corb. Well, I shall prevent him yet. See, Mosca, look, Here I have brought a bag of bright chequins,[1578] Will quite lay down his plate.

Mos. [taking the bag.] Yea, marry, sir. 70 This is true physic, this your sacred medicine; No talk of opiates to this great elixir!

Corb. ’T is aurum palpabile, if not potabile.

Mos. It shall be minister’d to him in his bowl.

Corb. Ay, do, do, do.

Mos. Most blessed cordial! 75 This will recover him.

Corb. Yes, do, do, do.

Mos. I think it were not best, sir.

Corb. What?

Mos. To recover him.

Corb. O, no, no, no; by no means.

Mos. Why, sir, this Will work some strange effect, if he but feel it.

Corb. ’T is true, therefore forbear; I ’ll take my venture: 80 Give me ’t again.

Mos. At no hand: pardon me: You shall not do yourself that wrong, sir. I Will so advise you, you shall have it all.

Corb. How?

Mos. All, sir; ’t is your right, your own; no man Can claim a part: ’t is yours without a rival, 85 Decreed by destiny.

Corb. How, how, good Mosca?

Mos. I’ll tell you, sir. This fit he shall recover.—

Corb. I do conceive you.

Mos. And on first advantage Of his gain’d sense, will I re-importune him Unto the making of his testament: 90 And show him this. [Pointing to the money.]

Corb. Good, good.

Mos. ’T is better yet. If you will hear, sir.

Corb. Yes, with all my heart.

Mos. Now would I counsel you, make home with speed; There, frame a will; whereto you shall inscribe My master your sole heir.

Corb. And disinherit 95 My son?

Mos. O, sir, the better: for that colour[1579] Shall make it much more taking.

Corb. O, but colour?

Mos. This will, sir, you shall send it unto me. Now, when I come to inforce, as I will do, Your cares, your watchings, and your many prayers, 100 Your more than many gifts, your this day’s present, And last, produce your will; where, without thought, Or least regard, unto your proper issue, A son so brave, and highly meriting, The stream of your diverted love hath thrown you 105 Upon my master, and made him your heir; He cannot be so stupid, or stone-dead, But out of conscience and mere gratitude——

Corb. He must pronounce me his?

Mos. ’T is true.

Corb. This plot Did I think on before.

Mos. I do believe it. 110

Corb. Do you not believe it?

Mos. Yes, sir,

Corb. Mine own project.

Mos. Which, when he hath done, sir——

Corb. Publish’d me his heir?

Mos. And you so certain to survive him——

Corb. Ay.

Mos. Being so lusty a man——

Corb. ’T is true.

Mos. Yes, sir——

Corb. I thought on that too. See, how he should be 115 The very organ to express my thoughts!

Mos. You have not only done yourself a good——

Corb. But multipli’d it on my son.

Mos. ’T is right, sir.

Corb. Still, my invention.

Mos. ’Las, sir! heaven knows, It hath been all my study, all my care, 120 (I e’en grow gray withal,) now to work things——

Corb. I do conceive, sweet Mosca.

Mos. You are he For whom I labour here.

Corb. Ay, do, do, do: I ’ll straight about it. [Going.]

Mos. [Aside.] Rook go with you,[1580] raven!

Corb. I know thee honest.

Mos. You do lie, sir!

Corb. And—— 125

Mos. Your knowledge is no better than your ears, sir.

Corb. I do not doubt to be a father to thee.

Mos. Nor I to gull my brother of his blessing.

Corb. I may ha’ my youth restor’d to me, why not?

Mos. Your worship is a precious ass!

Corb. What sayst thou?

Mos. I do desire your worship to make haste, sir. 131

Corb. ’T is done, ’t is done; I go. [Exit]

Volp. [leaping from his couch.] O, I shall burst! Let out my sides, let out my sides——

Mos. Contain Your flux of laughter, sir: you know this hope Is such a bait, it covers any hook. 135

Volp. O, but thy working, and thy placing it! I cannot hold; good rascal, let me kiss thee: I never knew thee in so rare a humour.

Mos. Alas, sir, I but do as I am taught; Follow your grave instructions; give ’em words; 140 Pour oil into their ears, and send them hence.

Volp. ’T is true, ’t is true. What a rare punishment Is avarice to itself!

Mos. Ay, with our help, sir.

Volp. So many cares, so many maladies, So many fears attending on old age. 145 Yea, so often call’d on, as no wish Can be more frequent with ’em, their limbs faint, Their senses dull, their seeing, hearing, going, All dead before them; yea, their very teeth, Their instruments of eating, failing them: 150 Yet this is reckon’d life! Nay, here was one, Is now gone home, that wishes to live longer! Feels not his gout, nor palsy; feigns himself Younger by scores of years, flatters his age With confident belying it, hopes he may 155 With charms like Aeson, have his youth restor’d; And with these thoughts so battens, as if fate Would be as easily cheated on as he, And all turns air! Who ’s that there, now? a third! Another knocks.

Mos. Close, to your couch again; I hear his voice. 160 It is Corvino, our spruce merchant.

Volp. [Lies down as before.] Dead.

Mos. Another bout, sir, with your eyes [Anointing them]. Who ’s there?

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Act I, Scene V — [1581]

MOSCA, VOLPONE. [Enter] CORVINO.

Signior Corvino! come most wish’d for! O, How happy were you, if you knew it, now!

Corv. Why? what? wherein?

Mos. The tardy hour is come, sir.

Corv. He is not dead?

Mos. Not dead, sir, but as good; He knows no man.

Corv. How shall I do then?

Mos. Why, sir? 5

Corv. I have brought him here a pearl.

Mos. Perhaps he has So much remembrance left as to know you, sir: He still calls on you; nothing but your name Is in his mouth. Is your pearl orient,[1582] sir?

Corv. Venice was never owner of the like. 10

Volp. [faintly.] Signior Corvino!

Mos. Hark!

Volp. Signior Corvino.

Mos. He calls you; step and give it him.— He’s here, sir. And he has brought you a rich pearl.

Corv. How do you, sir? Tell him it doubles the twelve carat.

Mos. Sir, He cannot understand, his hearing’s gone; 15 And yet it comforts him to see you——

Corv. Say I have a diamond for him, too.

Mos. Best show ’t, sir; Put it into his hand: ’t is only there He apprehends: he has his feeling yet. See how he grasps it!

Corv. ’Las, good gentleman! 20 How pitiful the sight is!

Mos. Tut, forget, sir. The weeping of an heir should still be laughter Under a visor.

Corv. Why, am I his heir?

Mos. Sir, I am sworn, I may not show the will Till he be dead: but here has been Corbaccio, Here has been Voltore, here were others too, 26 I cannot number ’em, they were so many; All gaping here for legacies: but I, Taking the vantage of his naming you, Signior Corvino, Signior Corvino, took 30 Paper, and pen, and ink, and there I ask’d him Whom he would have his heir! Corvino. Who Should be executor? Corvino. And To any question he was silent to, I still interpreted the nods he made, 35 Through weakness, for consent: and sent home th’ others, Nothing bequeath’d them, but to cry and curse.

Corv. O, my dear Mosca. (They embrace.) Does he not perceive us?

Mos. No more than a blind harper. He knows no man, No face of friend, nor name of any servant, 40 Who ’t was that fed him last, or gave him drink. Not those he hath begotten, or brought up, Can he remember.

Corv. Has he children?

Mos. Bastards, Some dozen, or more, that he begot on beggars, Gypsies, and Jews, and black-moors, when he was drunk. 45 Knew you not that, sir? ’t is the common fable, The dwarf, the fool, the eunuch, are all his; He’s the true father of his family, In all save me:—but he has giv’n ’em nothing.

Corv. That’s well, that’s well! Art sure he does not hear us? 50

Mos. Sure, sir! why, look you, credit your own sense. [Shouts in VOL.’s ear.] The pox approach, and add to your diseases, If it would send you hence the sooner, sir, For your incontinence, it hath deserv’d it Throughly and throughly, and the plague to boot!— 55 You may come near, sir.—Would you would once close Those filthy eyes of yours, that flow with slime Like two frog-pits; and those same hanging cheeks, Cover’d with hide instead of skin—Nay, help, sir[1583]—— That look like frozen dish-clouts set on end! 60

Corv. Or like an old smok’d wall, on which the rain Ran down in streaks!

Mos. Excellent, sir! speak out: You may be louder yet; a culverin Discharged in his ear would hardly bore it.

Corv. His nose is like a common sewer, still running. 65

Mos. ’T is good! And what his mouth?

Corv. A very draught.

Mos. O, stop it up——

Corv. By no means.

Mos. Pray you, let me: Faith I could stifle him rarely with a pillow As well as any woman that should keep him.

Corv. Do as you will; but I’ll begone.

Mos. Be so; 70 It is your presence makes him last so long.

Corv. I pray you use no violence.

Mos. No, sir! why? Why should you be thus scrupulous, pray you, sir?

Corv. Nay, at your discretion.

Mos. Well, good sir, be gone.

Corv. I will not trouble him now to take[1584] my pearl. 75

Mos. Puh! nor your diamond. What a needless care Is this afflicts you? Is not all here yours? Am not I here, whom you have made your creature? That owe my being to you?

Corv. Grateful Mosca! 79 Thou art my friend, my fellow, my companion, My partner, and shalt share in all my fortunes.

Mos. Excepting one.

Corv. What’s that?

Mos. Your gallant wife, sir. [Exit CORV.] Now is he gone: we had no other means To shoot him hence but this.

Volp. My divine Mosca! 85 Thou hast to-day outgone thyself. Who’s there? Another knocks. I will be troubled with no more. Prepare Me music, dances, banquets, all delights; The Turk is not more sensual in his pleasures Than will Volpone. [Exit MOS.] Let me see; a pearl! A diamond! plate! chequins! Good morning’s purchase.[1585] 90 Why, this is better than rob churches, yet; Or fat, by eating, once a month, a man—— [Re-enter MOSCA.] Who is ’t?

Mos. The beauteous Lady Would-be, sir, Wife to the English knight, Sir Politic Would-be, (This is the style, sir, is directed me,) 95 Hath sent to know how you have slept to-night, And if you would be visited?

Volp. Not now: Some three hours hence.

Mos. I told the squire[1586] so much.

Volp. When I am high with mirth and wine; then then: 99 ’Fore heaven, I wonder at the desperate valour Of the bold English, that they dare let loose Their wives to all encounters!

Mos. Sir, this knight Had not his name for nothing, he is politic, And knows, howe’er his wife affect strange airs, She hath not yet the face to be dishonest: 105 But had she Signior Corvino’s wife’s face——

Volp. Hath she so rare a face?

Mos. O, sir, the wonder, The blazing star of Italy! a wench Of the first year, a beauty ripe as harvest! Whose skin is whiter than a swan all over, 110 Than silver, snow, or lilies; a soft lip, Would tempt you to eternity of kissing! And flesh that melteth in the touch to blood! Bright as your gold, and lovely as your gold!

Volp. Why had not I known this before?

Mos. Alas, sir, 115 Myself but yesterday discover’d it.

Volp. How might I see her?

Mos. O, not possible; She’s kept as warily as is your gold; Never does come abroad, never takes air But at a windore. All her looks are sweet, 120 As the first grapes or cherries, and are watch’d As near as they are.

Volp. I must see her.

Mos. Sir, There is a guard of ten spies thick upon her, All his whole household; each of which is set Upon his fellow, and have all their charge, 125 When he goes out, when he comes in, examin’d.

Volp. I will go see her, though but at her windore.

Mos. In some disguise then.

Volp. That is true; I must Maintain mine own shape still the same: we’ll think. [Exeunt.]

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Act II, Scene I — [1587]

[Enter] SIR POLITIC WOULD-BE, and PEREGRINE.

Sir P. Sir, to a wise man, all the world’s his soil: It is not Italy, nor France, nor Europe, That must bound me, if my fates call me forth. Yet I protest, it is no salt desire Of seeing countries, shifting a religion, 5 Nor any disaffection to the state Where I was bred, and unto which I owe My dearest plots, hath brought me out, much less That idle, antique, stale, grey-headed project Of knowing men’s minds and manners, with Ulysses! 10 But a peculiar humour of my wife’s Laid for this height of Venice, to observe, To quote,[1588] to learn the language, and so forth—— I hope you travel, sir, with licence?

Per. Yes.

Sir P. I dare the safelier converse——How long, sir, 15 Since you left England?

Per. Seven weeks.

Sir P. So lately! You have not been with my lord ambassador?

Per. Not yet, sir.

Sir P. Pray you, what news, sir, vents our climate? I heard last night a most strange thing reported By some of my lord’s followers, and I long 21 To hear how ’t will be seconded.

Per. What was ’t, sir?

Sir P. Marry, sir, of a raven that should build In a ship royal of the king’s.

Per. [Aside.] This fellow, Does he gull me, trow? or is gull’d? Your name, sir?

Sir P. My name is Politic Would-be.

Per. [Aside.] O, that speaks him. 25 A knight, sir?

Sir P. A poor knight, sir.

Per. Your lady Lies[1589] here in Venice, for intelligence Of tires and fashions, and behaviour, Among the courtesans? The fine Lady Would-be?

Sir P. Yes, sir; the spider and the bee ofttimes 30 Suck from one flower.

Per. Good Sir Politic, I cry you mercy; I have heard much of you: ’T is true, sir, of your raven.

Sir P. On your knowledge?

Per. Yes, and your lion’s whelping in the Tower.

Sir P. Another whelp![1590]

Per. Another, sir.

Sir P. Now heaven! 35 What prodigies be these? The fires at Berwick! And the new star! These things concurring, strange. And full of omen! Saw you those meteors?

Per. I did, sir.

Sir P. Fearful! Pray you, sir, confirm me, Were there three porpoises seen above the bridge, 40 As they give out?

Per. Six, and a sturgeon, sir.

Sir P. I am astonish’d.

Per. Nay, sir, be not so; I ’ll tell you a greater prodigy than these.

Sir P. What should these things portend?

Per. The very day (Let me be sure) that I put forth from London, There was a whale discover’d in the river, 46 As high as Woolwich, that had waited there, Few know how many months, for the subversion Of the Stode fleet.

Sir P. Is ’t possible? Believe it, ’T was either sent from Spain, or the archduke’s: 50 Spinola’s whale, upon my life, my credit! Will they not leave these projects? Worthy sir, Some other news.

Per. Faith, Stone the fool is dead, And they do lack a tavern fool extremely.

Sir P. Is Mass Stone dead?

Per. He ’s dead, sir; why, I hope 55 You thought him not immortal?—[Aside.] O, this knight, Were he well known, would be a precious thing To fit our English stage: he that should write But such a fellow, should be thought to feign Extremely, if not maliciously.

Sir P. Stone dead! 60

Per. Dead.—Lord! how deeply, sir, you apprehend it! He was no kinsman to you?

Sir P. That I know of. Well! that same fellow was an unknown fool.

Per. And yet you knew him, it seems?

Sir P. I did so. Sir, I knew him one of the most dangerous heads 65 Living within the state, and so I held him.

Per. Indeed, sir?

Sir P. While he liv’d, in action, He has receiv’d weekly intelligence, Upon my knowledge, out of the Low Countries, For all parts of the world, in cabbages; 70 And those dispens’d again to ambassadors, In oranges, musk-melons, apricots, Lemons, pome-citrons, and such-like; sometimes In Colchester oysters, and your Selsey cockles.

Per. You make me wonder.

Sir P. Sir, upon my knowledge. 75 Nay, I’ve observ’d him, at your public ordinary, Take his advertisement[1591] from a traveller, A conceal’d statesman, in a trencher of meat; And instantly, before the meal was done, Convey an answer in a tooth-pick.

Per. Strange! 80 How could this be, sir?

Sir P. Why, the meat was cut So like his character, and so laid as he Must easily read the cipher.

Per. I have heard, He could not read, sir.

Sir P. So ’t was given out, In policy, by those that did employ him: 85 But he could read, and had your languages, And to ’t, as sound a noddle——

Per. I have heard, sir, That your baboons were spies, and that they were A kind of subtle nation near to China.

Sir P. Ay, ay, your Mamaluchi. Faith, they had 90 Their hand in a French plot or two; but they Were so extremely giv’n to women, as They made discovery of all: yet I Had my advices here, on Wednesday last, From one of their own coat, they were return’d, Made their relations, as the fashion is, 96 And now stand fair for fresh employment.

Per. [Aside.] Heart! This Sir Pol will be ignorant of nothing.—— It seems, sir, you know all.

Sir P. Not all, sir; but I have some general notions. I do love 100 To note and to observe: though I live out, Free from the active torrent, yet I ’d mark The currents and the passages of things For mine own private use; and know the ebbs And flows of state.

Per. Believe it, sir. I hold 105 Myself in no small tie[1592] unto my fortunes, For casting me thus luckily upon you, Whose knowledge, if your bounty equal it, May do me great assistance, in instruction For my behaviour, and my bearing, which 110 Is yet so rude and raw.

Sir P. Why? came you forth Empty of rules for travel?

Per. Faith, I had Some common ones, from out that vulgar grammar, Which he that cri’d Italian to me, taught me.

Sir P. Why, this it is that spoils all our brave bloods, 115 Trusting our hopeful gentry unto pedants, Fellows of outside, and mere bark. You seem To be a gentleman of ingenuous race:—— I not profess it, but my fate hath been To be, where I have been consulted with, 120 In this high kind, touching some great men’s sons, Persons of blood and honour.——

Per. Who be these, sir?

Spotted a typo or a problem in this chapter? Tell us

Act II, Scene II

[To them enter] MOSCA and NANO [disguised, followed by persons with materials for erecting a stage.]

Mos. Under that window, there ’t must be. The same.

Sir P. Fellows, to mount a bank. Did your instructor In the dear tongues, never discourse to you Of the Italian mountebanks?

Per. Yes, sir.

Sir P. Why, Here shall you see one.

Per. They are quacksalvers, Fellows that live by venting oils and drugs. 6

Sir P. Was that the character he gave you of them?

Per. As I remember.

Sir. P. Pity his ignorance. They are the only knowing men of Europe! Great general scholars, excellent physicians, 10 Most admir’d statesmen, profest favourites And cabinet counsellors to the greatest princes; The only languag’d men of all the world!

Per. And, I have heard, they are most lewd[1593] impostors; Made all of terms and shreds; no less beliers 15 Of great men’s favours, than their own vile medicines; Which they will utter upon monstrous oaths; Selling that drug for twopence, ere they part, Which they have valu’d at twelve crowns before.

Sir P. Sir, calumnies are answer’d best with silence. 20 Yourself shall judge.—Who is it mounts, my friends?

Mos. Scoto of Mantua,[1594] sir.

Sir P. Is ’t he? Nay, then I ’ll proudly promise, sir, you shall behold Another man than has been phant’sied[1595] to you. I wonder yet, that he should mount his bank, 25 Here in this nook, that has been wont t’ appear In face of the Piazza!—Here he comes.

[Enter VOLPONE, disguised as a mountebank Doctor, and followed by a crowd of people.]

Volp. Mount, zany. [To NANO.]

Mob. Follow, follow, follow, follow!

Sir P. See how the people follow him! he’s a man 30 May write ten thousand crowns in bank here. Note, [VOLPONE mounts the stage.] Mark but his gesture:—I do use to observe The state he keeps in getting up.

Per. ’T is worth it, sir.

Volp. “Most noble gentlemen, and my (34) worthy patrons! It may seem strange that I, your Scoto Mantuano, who was ever wont to fix my bank in the face of the public Piazza, near the shelter of the Portico to the Procuratia, should now, after eight months’ absence from (40) this illustrious city of Venice, humbly retire myself into an obscure nook of the Piazza.”

Sir P. Did not I now object the same?

Per. Peace, sir.

Volp. “Let me tell you: I am not, as your Lombard proverb saith, cold on my feet; or (45) content to part with my commodities at a cheaper rate than I am accustom’d: look not for it. Nor that the calumnious reports of that impudent detractor, and shame to our profession (Alessandro Buttone, I mean), who gave (50) out, in public, I was condemn’d a’ sforzato[1596] to the galleys, for poisoning the Cardinal Bembo’s—cook, hath at all attach’d, much less dejected me. No, no, worthy gentlemen; to tell you true, I cannot endure to see the rabble of (55) these ground ciarlitani,[1597] that spread their cloaks on the pavement, as if they meant to do feats of activity, and then come in lamely, with their mouldy tales out of Boccacio, like stale Tabarin,[1598] the fabulist: some of them discoursing (60) their travels, and of their tedious captivity in the Turk’s galleys, when, indeed, were the truth known, they were the Christian’s galleys, where very temperately they eat bread, and drunk water, as a wholesome penance, enjoin’d them (65) by their confessors, for base pilferies.”

Sir P. Note but his bearing, and contempt of these.

Volp. “These turdy-facy-nasty-paty-lousy-fartical (69) rogues, with one poor groat’s-worth of unprepar’d antimony, finely wrapt up in several scartoccios,[1599] are able, very well, to kill their twenty a week, and play; yet these meagre, starv’d spirits, who have half stopt the organs (74) of their minds with earthy oppilations,[1600] want not their favourers among your shrivell’d salad-eating artisans, who are overjoy’d that they may have their half-pe’rth of physic; though it purge ’em into another world, ’t makes no matter.”

Sir P. Excellent! ha’ you heard better language, sir? 80

Volp. “Well, let ’em go. And, gentlemen, honourable gentlemen, know, that for this time, our bank, being thus removed from the clamours of the canaglia[1601] shall be the scene of pleasure and delight; for I have nothing (85) to sell, little or nothing to sell.”

Sir P. I told you, sir, his end.

Per. You did so, sir.

Volp. “I protest. I, and my six servants, are not able to make of this precious liquor so fast (90) as it is fetch’d away from my lodging by gentlemen of your city; strangers of the Terra-firma;[1602] worshipful merchants; ay, and senators too: who, ever since my arrival, have detain’d me to their uses, by their splendidous liberalities. (95) And worthily; for, what avails your rich man to have his magazines stuft with moscadelli, or of the purest grape, when his physicians prescribe him, on pain of death, to drink (99) nothing but water cocted[1603] with aniseeds? O health! health! the blessing of the rich! the riches of the poor! who can buy thee at too dear a rate, since there is no enjoying this world without thee? Be not then so sparing of your purses, honourable gentlemen, as to abridge the natural course of life——” 105

Per. You see his end.

Sir P. Ay, is’t not good?

Volp. “For when a humid flux, or catarrh, by the mutability of air, falls from your head into an arm or shoulder, or any other part; take you a ducket, or your chequin of gold, and (110) apply to the place affected: see what good effect it can work. No, no, ’t is this blessed unguento,[1604] this rare extraction, that hath only power to disperse all malignant humours, that proceed either of hot, cold, moist, or windy causes——” 115

Per. I would he had put in dry too.

Sir P. Pray you observe.

Volp. “To fortify the most indigest and crude stomach, ay, were it of one that, through extreme weakness, vomited blood, applying only (120) a warm napkin to the place, after the unction and fricace;[1605]—for the vertigine[1606] in the head, putting but a drop into your nostrils, likewise behind the ears; a most sovereign and approv’d (124) remedy; the mal caduco,[1607] cramps, convulsions, paralyses, epilepsies, tremorcordia, retir’d nerves, ill vapours of the spleen, stoppings of the liver, the stone, the strangury, hernia ventosa, iliaca passio;[1608] stops a dysenteria immediately; easeth the torsion[1609] of the small (130) guts; and cures melancholia hypocondriaca, being taken and appli’d, according to my printed receipt. (Pointing to his bill and his glass.) For this is the physician, this the medicine; this counsels, this cures; this gives the direction, (135) this works the effect; and, in sum, both together may be term’d an abstract of the theoric and practic in the Aesculapian art. ’T will cost you eight crowns. And,—Zan Fritada, prithee sing a verse extempore in honour of it.” 140

Sir P. How do you like him, sir?

Per. Most strangely, I!

Sir P. Is not his language rare?

Per. But alchemy, I never heard the like; or Broughton’s[1610] books.

[NANO sings.]

Had old Hippocrates, or Galen, That to their books put med’cines all in, 145 But known this secret, they had never (Of which they will be guilty ever) Been murderers of so much paper, Or wasted many a hurtless taper; No Indian drug had e’er been fam’d, 150 Tobacco, sassafras not nam’d. Ne yet of guacum one small stick, sir, Nor Raymund Lully’s[1611] great elixir. Ne had been known the Danish Gonswart,[1612] Or Paracelsus, with his long sword.[1613] 155

Per. All this, yet, will not do; eight crowns is high.

Volp. “No more.—Gentlemen, if I had but time to discourse to you the miraculous effects of this my oil, surnam’d Oglio del Scoto; with the countless catalogue of those I have (160) cur’d of th’ aforesaid, and many more diseases; the patents and privileges of all the princes and commonwealths of Christendom; or but the depositions of those that appear’d on my part, before the signiory of the Sanita and most (165) learned College of Physicians; where I was authoris’d, upon notice taken of the admirable virtues of my medicaments, and mine own excellency in matter of rare and unknown secrets, not only to disperse them publicly in this (170) famous city, but in all the territories, that happily joy under the government of the most pious and magnificent states of Italy. But may some other gallant fellow say, ’O, there be divers that make profession to have as good, (175) and as experimented receipts as yours: indeed, very many have assay’d, like apes, in imitation of that, which is really and essentially in me, to make of this oil; bestow’d great cost in 179 furnaces, stills, alembics, continual fires, and preparation of the ingredients (as indeed there goes to it six hundred several simples, besides some quantity of human fat, for the conglutination, which we buy of the anatomists), but when these practitioners come to the last decoction, (185) blow, blow, puff, puff, and all flies in fumo:[1614] ha, ha, ha! Poor wretches! I rather pity their folly and indiscretion, than their loss of time and money; for those may be recover’d by industry: but to be a fool born, is a disease incurable. 191 “For myself, I always from my youth have endeavour’d to get the rarest secrets, and book them, either in exchange, or for money; I spar’d nor cost nor labour, where anything (195) was worthy to be learned. And, gentlemen, honourable gentlemen, I will undertake, by virtue of chymical art, out of the honourable hat that covers your head, to extract the four elements; that is to say, the fire, air, water, (200) and earth, and return you your felt without burn or stain. For, whilst others have been at the ballo,[1615] I have been at my book; and am now past the craggy paths of study, and come to the flowery plains of honour and reputation.” 205

Sir P. I do assure you, sir, that is his aim.

Volp. “But to our price——”

Per. And that withal, Sir Pol.

Volp. “You all know, honourable gentlemen, I never valu’d this ampulla, or vial, at less than eight crowns; but for this time, I am content (210) to be depriv’d of it for six; six crowns is the price, and less in courtesy I know you cannot offer me; take it or leave it, howsoever, both it and I am at your service. I ask you not as the value of the thing, for then I should demand (215) of you a thousand crowns, so the Cardinals Montalto, Fernese, the great Duke of Tuscany, my gossip,[1616] with divers other princes, have given me; but I despise money. Only to show my affection to you, honourable gentlemen, (220) and your illustrious State here, I have neglected the messages of these princes, mine own offices, fram’d my journey hither, only to present you with the fruits of my travels.—Tune (225) your voices once more to the touch of your instruments, and give the honourable assembly some delightful recreation.”

Per. What monstrous and most painful circumstance Is here, to get some three or four gazettes,[1617] Some threepence i’ the whole! for that ’t will come to. 230

[NANO sings.]

You that would last long, list to my song, Make no more coil, but buy of this oil. Would you be ever fair and young? Stout of teeth, and strong of tongue? Tart of palate? quick of ear? 235 Sharp of sight? of nostril clear? Moist of hand? and light of foot? Or, I will come nearer to ’t, Would you live free from all diseases? Do the act your mistress pleases, 240 Yet fright all aches[1618] from your bones? Here ’s a med’cine for the nones.[1619]

Volp. “Well, I am in a humour at this time to make a present of the small quantity my coffer contains; to the rich in courtesy, and (245) to the poor for God’s sake. Wherefore now mark: I ask’d you six crowns; and six crowns, at other times, you have paid me; you shall not give me six crowns, nor five, nor four, nor three, nor two, nor one; nor half a ducat; no, nor a (250) moccinigo.[1620] Sixpence it will cost you, or six hundred pound—expect no lower price, for, by the banner of my front, I will not bate a bagatine,[1621]—that I will have, only, a pledge of your loves, to carry something from amongst you, to (255) show I am not contemn’d by you. Therefore, now, toss your handkerchiefs, cheerfully, cheerfully; and be advertis’d, that the first heroic spirit that deigns to grace me with a handkerchief, I will give it a little remembrance of (260) something beside, shall please it better than if I had presented it with a double pistolet.”[1622]

Per. Will you be that heroic spark, Sir Pol? CELIA, at the window, throws down her handkerchief. O, see! the windore has prevented[1623] you.

Volp. “Lady, I kiss your bounty; and for (265) this timely grace you have done your poor Scoto of Mantua, I will return you, over and above my oil, a secret of that high and inestimable nature, shall make you forever enamour’d on that minute, wherein your eye first descended (270) on so mean, yet not altogether to be despis’d, an object. Here is a powder conceal’d in this paper, of which, if I should speak to the worth, nine thousand volumes were but as one page, that page as a line, that line as a word; (275) so short is this pilgrimage of man (which some call life) to the expressing of it. Would I reflect on the price? Why, the whole world is but as an empire, that empire as a province, that province as a bank, that bank as a private purse (280) to the purchase of it. I will only tell you; it is the powder that made Venus a goddess (given her by Apollo), that kept her perpetually young, clear’d her wrinkles, firm’d her gums, fill’d her skin, colour’d her hair; from her deriv’d (285) to Helen, and at the sack of Troy unfortunately lost: till now, in this our age, it was as happily recover’d, by a studious antiquary, out of some ruins of Asia, who sent a moiety of it to the court of France (but much (290) sophisticated), wherewith the ladies there now colour their hair. The rest, at this present, remains with me; extracted to a quintessence: so that, wherever it but touches, in youth it perpetually preserves, in age restores the complexion; (295) seats your teeth, did they dance like virginal jacks,[1624] firm as a wall: makes them white as ivory, that were black as——”

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Act II, Scene III — [1625]

[To them enter] CORVINO.

Cor. Spite o’ the devil, and my shame! come down here; Come down!—No house but mine to make your scene? Signior Flaminio, will you down, sir? down? What, is my wife your Franciscina, sir? No windows on the whole Piazza, here, 5 To make your properties, but mine? but mine? Beats away [VOLPONE, NANO, etc.] Heart! ere to-morrow I shall be new christen’d, And called the Pantalone di Besogniosi,[1626] About the town.

Per. What should this mean. Sir Pol?

Sir P. Some trick of state, believe it; I will home. 10

Per. It may be some design on you.

Sir P. I know not. I ’ll stand upon my guard.

Per. It is your hest, sir.

Sir P. This three weeks, all my advices, all my letters, They have been intercepted.

Per. Indeed, sir! Best have a care.

Sir P. Nay, so I will.

Per. This knight, 15 I may not lose him, for my mirth, till night. [Exeunt.]

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Act II, Scene IV — [1627]

[Enter] VOLPONE, MOSCA.

Volp. O, I am wounded!

Mos. Where, sir?

Volp. Not without; Those blows were nothing: I could bear them ever. But angry Cupid, bolting from her eyes, Hath shot himself into me like a flame; Where now he flings about his burning heat, 5 As in a furnaces an ambitious fire Whose vent is stopt. The fight is all within me. I cannot live, except thou help me, Mosca; My liver melts, and I, without the hope Of some soft air from her refreshing breath, 10 Am but a heap of cinders.

Mos. ’Las, good sir, Would you had never seen her!

Volp. Nay, would thou Hadst never told me of her!

Mos. Sir, ’t is true; I do confess I was unfortunate, And you unhappy; but I ’m bound in conscience, 15 No less than duty, to effect my best To your release of torment, and I will, sir.

Volp. Dear Mosca, shall I hope?

Mos. Sir, more than dear, I will not bid you to despair of aught Within a human compass.

Volp. O, there spoke 20 My better angel. Mosca, take my keys, Gold, plate, and jewels, all ’s at thy devotion; Employ them how thou wilt: nay, coin me too: So thou in this but crown my longings, Mosca.

Mos. Use but your patience.

Volp. So I have.

Mos. I doubt not, 25 To bring success to your desires.

Volp. Nay, then, I not repent me of my late disguise.

Mos. If you can horn him, sir, you need not.

Volp. True: Besides, I never meant him for my heir. Is not the colour o’ my beard and eyebrows 30 To make me known?

Mos. No jot.

Volp. I did it well.

Mos. So well, would I could follow you in mine, With half the happiness! and yet I would Escape your epilogue.[1628]

Volp. But were they gull’d With a belief that I was Scoto?

Mos. Sir, 35 Scoto himself could hardly have distinguish’d! I have not time to flatter you now; we ’ll part: And as I prosper, so applaud my art. [Exeunt.]

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