The history of Amelia

Book I. Chap

TAGE I. Contains the exordium, &c. I II. The history sets out — Observations on the excellency of the English constitution, and curious examinations before a justice of peace III. Containing the inside of a prison t 3 4 6 IV. Disclosing farther secrets of the prison-house v. Containing certain adventures which befell Mr. Booth in the prison VI. Containing the extraordinary behaviour of Miss Matthews on her meeting with Booth ; and some endeavours to prove, by reason and authority, that it is possible for a woman to appear to be what she really is not VII. In which Miss Matthews begins her history 7 s VIII. The history of Miss Matthews continued IX. In which Miss Matthews concludes her relation . IO 1 1 X. Table-talk, consisting of a facetious discourse that passed in the prison '3

Book II

I. In which Captain Booth begins to relate his history 14 II. Mr. Booth continues his story — In this chapter there are some passages that may serve as a kind of touchstone, by which a young lady may examine the heart of her lover : I would advise, therefore, that every lover be obliged to read it over in the presence of his mistress, and that she carefully watch his emotions while he is reading '5 III. The narrative continued — More of the touchstone i6 IV. The story of Mr. Booth continued — In this chapter the reader will perceive a glimpse of the character of a very good divine, with some matters of a very tender kind ... 17 v. Containing strange revolutions of fortune VI. Containing many surprising adventures ... iS 19 VII. The story of Booth continued — More surprising adventures 21 Vin.

In which our readers will probably be divided in their opinion of Mr. Booth's conduct ... 22 -3 IX. Containing a scene of a different kind from any of the preceding CONTENTS.

Book III. Page Chap

I. In which Mr. Booth resumes his story II. Containing a scene of the tender kind 24 25 26 ill. In which Mr. Booth sets forward on his journey .. IV. A sea-piece ... 27 v. The arrival of Booth at Gibraltar, with what there befell him VI. Containing matters which will please some readers VII. The captain, continuing his story, recounts some particulars which, we doubt 29 3° not, to many good people, will appear unnatural 3i Vin. The story of Booth continued 32 IX. Containing very extraordinary matters ... x. Containing a letter of a very curious kind XI. In which Mr. Booth relates his return to England 34 35 36 XII. In which Mr. Booth concludes his story 37

Book IV

I. Containing very mysterious matter ... ... ... ... ... 39 II. The latter part of which, we expect, will please our reader better than the former ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... 40 in. Containing wise observations of the author, and other matters ... ... 42 IV. In which Amelia appears in no unamiable light ... ... ... ... 44 v. Containing an eulogium upon innocence, and other grave matters ... ... 45 VI. In which may appear, that violence is sometimes done to the name of love ... 47 vil. Containing a very extraordinary and pleasing incident ... ... ... 48 VIII. Containing various matters ... ... ... ... ... ... 49 IX. In which Amelia, with her friend, goes to the oratorio ... ... ... 5°

Book V

I. In which the reader will meet with an old acquaintance 11. In which Booth pays a visit to the noble lord in. Relating principally to the affairs of Sergeant Atkinson IV. Containing matters that require no preface 52 53 54 55 V. Containing much heroic matter 56 VI. In which the reader will find matter worthy his consideration vil. Containing various matters 57 59 6o VIII. The heroic behaviour of Colonel Bath .. IX. Being the last chapter of the fifth book .. 62

Book VI

1. Panegyrics on beauty, with other grave matter 63 11. Which will not appear, we presume, unnatural to all married readers in. In which the history looks a little backwards 64 65 IV. Containing a very extraordinary incident v. Containing some matters not very unnatural 66 6S VI. A scene, in which some ladies will, possibly, think Amelia's conduct exceptionable CONTENTS. V CHAP. rAGE vn. A chapter in which there is much learning ... ... ... ... 70 vm. Containing some unaccountable behaviour in Mrs. Ellison ... ... 71 IX. Containing a very strange incident ... ... ... ... ... 72

Book VII

1. A short chapter, and consequently requiring no preface ... ... ... 74 11. The beginning of Mrs. Bennet's history ... ... ... ... 74 m. Continuation of Mrs. Bennet's story ... ... ... ... ... 76 IV. Farther continuation ... ... ... ... ... ... ... 78 v. The story of Mrs. Bennet continued ... ... ... ... ... 79 VI. Farther continued ... . ... ... ... ... ... ... 81 VII. The story farther continued ... ... ... ... ... ... 83 VIII. Farther continuation ... ... ... ... ... ... ... 84 IX. The conclusion of Mrs. Bennet's history ... ... ... ... 85 x. Being the last chapter of the seventh book ... ... ... ... 86

Book VIII

1. Being the first chapter of the eighth book ... ... ... ... 87 II. Containing an account of Mr. Booth's fellow-sufferers ... ... ... 88 III. Containing some extraordinary behaviour in Mrs. Ellison ... ... ... 89 IV. Containing, among many matters, the exemplary behaviour of Colonel Jamss 90 v. Comments upon authors ... ... ... ... ... ... 91 VI. Which inclines rather to satire than panegyric ... ... ... ... 93 VII. Worthy a very serious perusal ... ... ... ... ... ... 94 viii. Consisting of grave matters ... ... ... ... ... ... 95 IX. A curious chapter from which a curious reader may draw sundry observations 97 x. In which are many profound secrets of philosophy ... ... ... 98

Book IX

1. In which the history looks backwards 11. In which the history goes forward 101 102 in. A conversation between Dr. Harrison and others IV. A dialogue between Booth and Amelia ... 103 io4 v. A conversation between Amelia and Dr. Harrison, with the result ... VI. Containing as surprising an accident as is, perhaps, recorded in history vil. In which the author appears to be master of that profound learning called the io6 io7 knowledge of the town 109 viii. In which two strangers make their appearance IX. A scene of modern wit and humour no 112 X. A curious conversation between the doctor, the young clergyman, and the young clergyman's father i'3

Book X

I. To which we will prefix no preface II. What happened at the masquerade US 116 ii? in. Consequences of the masquerade, not uncommon nor surprising VI CONTENTS. CHAP. PAGE IV. Consequences of the masquerade ... ... ... ••• ••• JI9 v. In which Colonel Bath appears in great glory ... ... ... ••■ I22 VI. Read, gamester, and observe ... ... ... ... ••• •■• I23 vn. In which Booth receives a visit from Captain Trent ... ••• •■• I24 via. Contains a letter, and other matters ... ... ... •■■ •■• I2° ix. Containing some things worthy observation ... ... ... ••• I2°

Book XI

i. Containing a very polite scene ... ... ... ... ... ... 129 II. Matters political ... ... ... ... ... ... ... 13° ill. The history of Mr. Trent ... ... ..." ... ... ... 132 IV. Containing some distress ... ... ... ... ... ... 135 v. Containing more wormwood and other ingredients ... ... ... 136 VI. A scene of the tragic kind ... ... ... ... ... ... 137 vii. In which Mr. Booth meets with more than one adventure ... ... 138 vm. In which Amelia appears in a light more amiable than gay ... ... 139 ix. A very tragic scene ... ... ... ... ... ... ... 140

Book XII

i. The book begins with polite history ... ... ... ... ... 141 II. In which Amelia visits her husband ... ... ... ... ... 142 III. Containing matter pertinent to the history ... ... ... ... 143 lv. In which Dr. Harrison visits Colonel James ... ... ... ... 145 v. What passed at the bailiff's house ... ... ... ... ... 146 vi. What passed between the doctor and the sick man ... ... ... 148 VII. In which the history draws towards a conclusion ... ... ... 149 vm. This history draws nearer to a conclusion ... ... ... ... 151 ix. In which the history is concluded ... ... ... ... ... TO RALPH ALLEN, ESQ. Sir, — The following book is sincerely designed to promote the cause of virtue, and to expose some of the most glaring evils, as well public as private, which at present infest the country ; though there is scatce, as I remember, a single stroke of satire aimed at any one person throughout the whole.

The best man is the properest patron of such an attempt ; this, I believe, will be readily granted : nor will the public voice, I think, be more divided, to whom they shall give that appellation. Should a letter, indeed, be thus inscribed, Detur Optimo, there are few persons who would think it wanted any other direction. I will not ttouble you with a preface concerning the work, nor endeavour to obviate any criticisms which can be made on it. The good-natured reader, if his heart should be here affected, will be inclined to pardon many faults for the pleasure he will receive from a tender sensation ; and for readers of a different stamp, the more faults they can discover, the more, I am convinced, they will be pleased. Nor will I assume the fulsome style of common dedicators : I have not their usual design in this epistie, nor will I borrow their language.

Long, very long may it be, before a most dreadful circumstance shall make it possible for any pen to draw a just and true character of yourself, without incurring a suspicion of (lattery in the bosoms of the malignant. This task, therefore, I shall defer till that day (if I should be so unfortunate as ever to see it) when every good man shall pay a tear for the satisfaction of his curiosity ; a day, which, at present, I believe, there is but one good man in the world who can think of it with unconcern. Accept then, sir, this small token of that love, that gratitude, and that respect, with which I shall always esteem it my greatest honour to be, sir, your most obliged, and most obedient humble servant, HENRY FIELDING. BOW-STEEET, Dec. 12, 1751.

Book I

fore, calls such a man fortunate, is guilty of no less impropriety in speech, than he would be, who should call the statuary or the poet fortunate, who carved. a Venus, or who wrote an Iliad. Chap. I. — Contains the exordium, &c. The various accidents which befell a very worthy couple, after their uniting in the state of matrimony, will be the subject of the following history. The distresses which they waded through were some of them so exquisite, and the incidents which produced these so extraordinary, that they seemed to require, not only the utmost malice, but the utmost invention which superstition has ever attributed to Fortune : though, whether any such being interfered in the case, or, indeed, whether there be any such being in the universe, is a matter which I by no means presume to determine in the affirmative.

To speak a bold truth, I am, after much mature deliberation, inclined to suspect that the public voice has, in all ages, done much injustice to Fortune, and has convicted her of many facts in which she had not the least concern. I question much, whether we may not, by natural means, account for the success of knaves, the calamities of fools, with all the miseries in which men of sense sometimes involve themselves, by quitting the directions of prudence, and following the blind guidance of a predominant passion ; in short, for all the ordinary phenomena which are imputed to Fortune, whom, perhaps, men accuse with no less absurdity in life, than a bad player complains of ill luck at the game of chess. But if men are sometimes guilty of laying improper blame on this imaginary being, they are altogether as apt to make her amends, by ascribing to her honours which she as little deserves.

To retrieve the ill con sequences of a foolish conduct, and, by struggling manfully with distress to subdue it, is one of the noblest efforts of wisdom and virtue. Whoever, there- Life may as properly be called an art as any other ; and the great incidents in it are no more to be considered as mere accidents, than the several members of a fine statue, or a noble poem. The critics in all these are not content with seeing any thing to be great, without knowing why and how it came to be so. By examining carefully the several gradations which conduce to bring every model to perfection, we learn truly to know that science in which the model is formed : as histories of this kind, therefore, may properly be called models'of human life ; so, by observing minutely the several incidents which tend to the catastrophe or completion of the whole, and the minute causes whence those incidents are produced, we shall best be instructed in this most useful of all arts, which I call the Art of Life.

Chap. II. — The history sets out — Observations on the excellency of the English constitution, and curious examinations before a justice of peace. On the first of April, in the year , the watchmen of a certain parish (I know not particularly which), within the liberty of Westminster, brought several persons, whom they had apprehended the preceding night, before Jonathan Thrasher, Esq., one of the justices of the peace for that liberty. But here, reader, before we proceed to the trials of these offenders, we shall, after our usual manner, premise some things which it may be necessary for thee to know. It has been observed, I think, by many, as well as the celebrated writer of Three Letters, that no human A institution is capable of consummate perfection ; — an observation, which, perhaps, that writer at least gathered from discovering some defects in the polity even of this well-regulated nation.

And, indeed, if there should be any such defect in a constitution, which my Lord Coke long ago told us, — ' the wisdom of all the wise men in the world, if they had all met together at one time, could not have equalled,' which some of our wisest men, who were met together long before, said was too good to be altered in any par ticular ; and which, nevertheless, has been mending ever since, by a very great number of the said wise men : — if, I say, this constitution should be imperfect, we may be allowed, I think, to doubt whether any such faultless model can be found among the institutions of men. justice of peace making of themselves at least two large volumes in folio, and that part of his jurisdic tion which is founded on the common law being dispersed in above a hundred volumes), I cannot conceive how this knowledge should be acquired without reading ; and yet, certain it is, Mr. Thrasher never read one syllable of the matter.

This, perhaps, was a defect ; but this was not all : for where mere ignorance is to decide a point between two litigants, it will always be an even chance whether it decides right or wrong: but sorry am I to say, right was often in a much worse situation than this, and wrong has often had five hundred to one on his side before that magistrate ; who, if he was ignorant of the laws of England, was yet well versed in the laws of nature. He perfectly well understood that fundamental principle, so strongly laid down in the institutes of the learned R'ochefoucault, by which the duty of self-love is so strongly enforced, and every man is taught to consider himself as the centre of gravity, and to attract all things thither. To speak the truth plainly, the justice was never indifferent in a cause, but when he could get nothing on either side.

Such was the justice, to whose tremendous bar Mr. Gotobed, the constable, on the day above-mentioned, brought several delinquents, who, as we have said, had been apprehended by the watch for divers out rages. It will probably be objected, that the small imper fections, which I am about to produce, do not lie in the laws themselves, but in the ill execution of them ; but, with submission, this appears to me to be no ess an absurdity, than to say of any machine that it is excellently made, though incapable of performing its functions. Good laws should execute themselves in a well-regulated state ; at least, if the same legis lature which provides the laws does not provide for the execution of them, they act as Graham would do, if he should form all the parts of a clock in the most exquisite manner, yet put them so together that the clock could not go.

In this case, surely, we might say that there was a small defect in the constitution of the clock. The first who came upon this trial, was as bloody a spectre as ever the imagination of a murderer or a tragic poet conceived. This poor wretch was charged with a battery by a much stouter man than himself : indeed, the accused person bore about nim some evidence that he had been in an affray, his clothes being very bloody ; but certain open sluices on his own head sufficiently showed whence all the scarlet stream had issued, whereas the accuser had not the least mark or appearance of any w ound. The justice asked the defendant what he meant by breaking the king's peace? to which he answered, "Upon my shoul I do love the king very well, and I have not been after breaking anything of his that I do know ; but upon my shoul this man has brake my head, and my head did brake his stick ; that is all, gra."

He then offered to produce several witnesses against this improbable accusation ; but the justice presently interrupted him, saying, "Sirrah, your tongue be trays your guilt : you are an Irishman, and that is always sufficient evidence with me." The second criminal was a poor woman, who was taken up by the watch as a street-walker. It was alleged against her, that she was found walking the streets after twelve o'clock, and the watchman de clared he believed her to be a common strumpet. She pleaded in her defence (as was really the truth), that she was a servant, and was sent by her mistress, who was a little shopkeeper, and upon the point of delivery, to fetch a midwife ; which she offered to prove by several of the neighbours, if she was allow ed to send for them. The justice asked her why she had not done it before? to which she answered, she had no money, and could get no messenger.

The justice then called her several scurrilous names ; and, de claring she was guilty, within the statute of street walking, ordered her to Bridewell for a month. A genteel young man and woman were then set forward, and a very grave-looking person swore he caught them in a situation, which we cannot as par ticularly describe here as he did before the magistrate, who, having received a wink from his clerk, declared with much warmth, that the fact was incredible and impossible. He presently discharged the accused parties, and was going, without any evidence, to com mit the accuser for perjury ; but this the clerk dis suaded him from, saying, he doubted whether a justice of peace had any such power. The justice at first differed in opinion ; and said, he had seen a man To say the truth, Graham would soon see the fault, and would easily remedy it : the fault, indeed, could be no other, than that the parts w ere impro perly disposed.

Perhaps, reader, I have another illustration, which will set my intention in a still clearer light before you. Figure to yourself, then, a family, the master of which should dispose of the several economical offices in the following manner : viz., should put his butler on the coach-box, his steward behind his coach, his coach man in the butlery, and his footman in the steward ship, and in the same ridiculous manner should mis employ the talents of every other servant ; it is easy to see what a figure such a family must make in the world. As ridiculous as this may seem, I have often con sidered some of the lower offices in our civil government to be disposed in this very manner. To begin, I think, as low as I well can, with the watchmen in our metropolis, who, being to guard our streets by night from thieves and robbers, an office which at least requires strength of body, are chosen out of those poor, old, decrepit people, who are, from their want of bodily strength, rendered incapable of getting a livelihood by work.

These men, armed only with a pole, which some of them are scarce able to lift, are to secure the persons and houses of his Majesty's subjects from the attacks of gangs of young, bold, stout, desperate, and well-armed villains : — Quæ non viribus istis Munera conveniunt. If the poor old fellows should run away from such enemies, no one 1 think can wonder, unless it be that they were able to m._ke tlitir escape. The higher we proceed among our public officers and magistrates, the less defects of this kind will, perhaps, be observable. Mr. Thrasher, however, the justice before whom the prisoners above-mentioned were now brought, had some few imperfections in his magistratical capacity. I own, I have been some times inclined to think, that this office of a justice of peace requires some knowledge of the law, for this simple reason ; because, in every case which comes before him, he is to judge and act according to law. tgain, as these laws are contained in a great variety f books (the statutes which relate to the office of a stand in the pillory about perjury ; nay, he had known a man in jail for it too ; and how came he there, if he was not committed thither?

" Why, that is true, sir," answered the clerk ; "and yet I have been told by a very great lawyer, that a man cannot be com mitted for perjury before he is indicted; and the reason is, I believe, because it is not against the peace before the indictment makes it so." — "Why, that may be," cries the justice ; "and, indeed, perjury is but scandalous words, and I know a man cannot have a warrant for those, unless you put for rioting* them into the warrant." was the poor man himself, in whose defence the last mentioned culprit was engaged. His trial took but a very short time. A cause of battery and broken lantern was instituted against him, and proved in the same manner ; nor would the justice hear one word in defence : but though his patience was exhausted, his breath was not ; for against this last wretch he poured forth a great many volleys of menace aud abuse.

The delinquents were then all despatched to prison, under a guard of watchmen ; and the justice and the constable adjourned to a neighbouring alehouse to take their morning repast. The witness was now about to be discharged, when the lady, whom he had accused, declared she would swear the peace against him ; for that he had called her a whore several times. "Oho ! you will swear the peace, madam, will you?" cries the justice: "give her the peace, presently; and pray, Mr. Constable, secure the prisoner, now we have him, while a warrant is made to take him up." All which was immediately performed, and the poor witness, for want of sureties, was sent to prison. A young fellow, whose name was Booth, was now charged with beating the watchman in the execution of his office, and breaking his lantern.

This was deposed by two witnesses ; and the shattered remains of a broken lantern, which had been long preserved for the sake of its testimony, were produced to corroborate the evidence. The justice, perceiving the criminal to be but shabbily dressed, was going to commit him without asking any farther questions. At length, however, at the earnest request of the accused, the worthy magistrate submitted to hear his defence. The young man then alleged, as was in reality the case, that, as he was walking home to his lodgings, he saw two men in the street cruelly beating a third, upon which he had stoppsd and endeavoured to assist the person who was so unequally attacked ; that the watch came up during the affray, and took them all four into custody ; that they were immedi ately carried to the roundhouse, where the two original assailants, who appeared to be men of for tune, found means to make up the matter, and were discharged by the constable ; a favour which he himself, having no money in his pocket, was unable to obtain.

He utterly denied having assaulted any of the watchmen, and solemnly declared that he was offered his liberty at the price of half-a-crown. Though the bare word of an offender can never be taken against the oath of his accuser ; yet the matter of this defence was so pertinent, and delivered with such an air of truth and sincerity, that had the magistrate been endued with much sagacity, or had he been gifted very moderately with another quality very necessary to all who are to administer justice, he would have employed some labour in cross-examining the watchmen ; at least, he would have given the defendant the time he desired to send for the other persons who were present at the affray ; neither of which he did. In short, the magistrate had too great an honour for Truth, to suspect that she ever ap peared in sordid apparel ; nor did he ever sully his sublime notions of that virtue, by uniting them with the mean ideas of poverty and distress.

There remained now only one prisoner, and that Chap. III. — Containing the inside of a prison. Mr. Booth (for we shall not trouble you with the rest) was no sooner arrived in the prison, than a number of persons gathered round him, all demand ing garnish ; to which Mr. Booth not making a ready answer, as indeed he did not understand the word, some were going to lay hold of him, when a person of apparent dignity came up, and insisted that no one should affront the gentleman. This person, then, who was no less than the master or keeper of the prison, turning towards Mr. Booth, acquainted him, that it was the custom of the place for every prisoner, upon his first arrival theie, to give some thing to the former prisoners to make them drink. This, he said, was what they called garnish ; and concluded with advising his new customer to draw his purse upon the present occasion.

Mr. Booth answered, that he would very readily comply with this laudable custom, was it in his power ; but that in reality he had not a shilling in his pocket, and what was worse, he had not a shilling in the world. " Oho! if that be the case," cries the keeper, " it is another matter, and I have nothing to say." Upon which, he immediately departed, and left poor Booth to the mercy of his companions, who, without loss of time, applied themselves to uncasing, as they termed it, and with such dexterity, that his coat was not only stripped off, but out of sight in a minute. Mr. Booth was too weak to resist, and too wise to complain of this usage. As soon, therefore, as he was at liberty, and declared free of the place, he sum moned his philosophy, of which he had no inconsider able share, to his assistance, and resolved to make himself as easy as possible under his present circumstances.

Could his own thoughts indeed have suffered him for a moment to forget where he was, the dispositions of the other prisoners might have induced him to believe that he had been in a happier place ; for much the greater part of his fellow-sufferers, instead of wailing and repining at their conditions, were laugh ing, singing, and diverting themselves with various kinds of sports and gambols. The first person who accosted him was called blear eyed Moll, a woman of no very comely appearance. Her eye (for she had but one), whence she derived her nickname, was such as that nickname bespoke : besides which, it had two remarkable qualities ; for, first, as if Nature had been careful to provide for her own defect, it constantly looked towards her blind side ; and, secondly, the ball consisted almost entirely of white, or rather of yellow, with a little grey spot in the corner, so small that it was scarce discernible.