The Lees of Blendon hall, by the author of 'Alice Wentworth'.

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CHAPTER I. I HAD been doubtM- ^ ^ to hovr I should

be able to get on ' -wheu qtiite > alone with my sister-in-law; nOt:liiat"I lad had any fear of strife arising between us; but I was uncertain if I should — when reduced to her single society and that of the children— find in her sufficient companionship to guard me against a relapse into that habit of melancholy pondering over past scenes^ which had so paralysed me VOL. in. B the year before, and into which I had been disposed to fall back during the latter part of our stay at Stonecliffe.

1 became gradually aware, however, that Christine had "much more in her," as it is called, than I had supposed; for her total absence of all wish to put forward her own opinions, and her calm power of yielding attentive interest to the conversation of others, without any inclination to take part in it uncalled for, had deceived me into thinking her incapable of forming, or following, any views wider or deeper than those needed to regulate her daily practical routine.

This I discovered to be by no means the case; for though her pursuits had been always different to mine, and her understanding developed under quite opposite influences, she had no stiff or narrow prejudices inspiring her with scorn or distrust of natures different to her own ; and in the more frequent interchange of ideas between us which now habitually occurred, I learnt that if she was without some kinds of knowledge that 1 possessed, she had some others from which my manner of life had debarred me.

She had, for three or four years of hers, been a good deal in ^ the world ; not the London world, but the mixed world of English travellers and residents abroad, with its sprinkling of "natives," which a sojourn in Switzerland and Italy, from fifteen or sixteen till twenty, had thrown her among; so that, as she did not lack the power of observing either things or persons, she was able, though no dealer in anecdotes, often to interest and entertain me by the accounts of much that was, in its details, new to me.

I saw that she thought me singular in

b2 some points; but she was so thoroughly kind, so willing to lay whatever she could not completely approve to my great misortune in not having had such a mother as hers had been, that I never suffered a moment during my intercourse with her from the feehng of being misunderstood to my disadvantage; and when we — ^as it sometimes befell — talked out our differences of view and feeling . on any subject, her excessive candour and gentle courtesy rendered it possible for us occasionally to go to the bottom of some knotty points, without either being led into those personalities which are in general the great bar to discussion of over-interesting subjects between those who mean to continue friends.

The life we led at Tynteford was most retired, partly owing to the situation of the place, and partly owing to the humble footing on which our establishment was set up.

There were, nevertheless, human beings around who furnished us, every now and then, with fresh subjects of talk, which, if not remarkably lively, were at all events different from what we should ourselves have originated, and so far afforded a variety to our thoughts and feelings.

Nor were these human beings solely of the kind with whom our dealings were simply matters of business or charity, tiiough neither the number nor nature of the households of the better class immediately about us were such as to provide us with much of what is commonly called society.

The clergyman and his wife were elderly people, whose only son was in India, and their nephew, who acted as curate to his uncle, was married to an unpretending, but shy and weak-spirited little woman, with whom Christine got on well, as she did with everyone, but who was too much occupied at home to have any great time or interest to spare for acquaintances.

Godfrey^s crony, the old half-pay naval officer, who had seen the world in his day — as well as been round it — ^talked agreeably and listened with interest on many subjects; but his health was too indifferent for him to be much of a visitor — especially as winter came on — or even for him to be always visible in the sitting-room at his brother's when we called at the Rectory; and when I have mentioned this family, and that of a late rector's widow who had an invalid daughter and a son in Australia, I think I have summed up everything that could claim the denomination of gentry in Tynteford, or within a walk of it, except it were a couple of elderly maiden sisters, who inhabited a remarkably pretty cottage just beyond the village, where their charity and benevolence

— though they were by no means wealthy — had become proverbial.

There were fanners in the district, more or less well off; but it was not till you got farther away by some miles that anything of what goes by the name of a ^^ neighbourhood " began to exist ; which " neighbourhood," besides being a good deal scattered, consisted mainly, as if through a kind of fate affecting that line of country, of old and childless couples, with a sprinkling of houses where there were indeed little children, but no "young people."

The inhabitants of these — ^mostly handsome and well-kept — country seats had, with few exceptions, already called on my brother and his wife when I arrived at Tynteford, and before the end of summer Godfrey had, by degrees, " killed them all off," as he called it, by driving Christine over in the ponycarriage on fine days to return their visits.

But winter weather was not favourable for the advancement of intimacy between us and these distant ^^ magnates'' of the land; more especially as our only vehicle was the open pony-chair above mentioned. Added to which Grodfrey's departure cut short those meetings on certain out-posts of neutral ground between him and the gentlemen of the vicinity, which had, I suppose, now and then reminded their famiUes that there were people of the name of Lee at Tynteford, too far off to ask to dinner, but not beyond the beat within which an invitation to an archery party might be sent, or a visit paid when others were due in the same direction.

Still, to all such civilities as were paid her, Christine invariably responded with an easy readiness, which somewhat surprised me in a person who certainly did not look to society either as a refuge from weariness at home^ or as a field for triumphs of vanity of any sort ; but I had not till noW; except it were in Hugh Wyndham, come across that disposition of which sociability, in its literal sense, is a naturally component part, distinct from any other aim and end than the pleasure afforded by kindly intercourse with those who give token of sympathy, or even courteous interest. This nature of hers was so winning, that I could not be astonished at its earning her golden opinions among all those who had an opportunity of experiencing the genuine good-will, far removed from officiousness, with which she took part in the concerns, little and greats of those with whom she was thrown ; and as it thus naturally befell that the persons who saw her most often were most pleased with her, it followed that she was very much noticed, as was I (for her sake, originally), by two ladies, an exceedingly agreeable mother and daughter, who, having that year come to occupy a property, considerably nearer to Tynteford than any of the other abodes of the regular county gentry, found Mrs. Lee more within the reach of their usual drives, than did most of the ^^ Dames Chatelaines" farther inward in what was looked on as being, by courtesy, our neighbourhood.

Mrs. Hedworth, the mother, had been pretty, and was still, at past fifty, most agreeable in appearance and manner, in which latter particular she had decidedly the advantage over her handsome, but not always very accessible daughter, who, no longer in the first bloom of youth, but a remarkably fine woman both in face and person, was apt to vary her demeanour according to her likes or dislikes, and was, therefore, designated by some as the ^^ proud and airified," by others, as "the fitmk and off*hand " Miss Hedworth*

Frank and off-hand to me and to Christine she always was, for I believe she really liked ns; but I saw enough of her deport^ ment towards others — and those far from insignificant members of their county acquamtance — to conyince me that the less favourable epithets bestowed on her were no ways undeserved* That, however, was no affair of ours; she and her mother had travelled a good deal, were well informed, ready in speech, frequent in their calls, and always visibly pleased to welcome us and the boys to early dinner in winter, to tea as spring advanced, whenever it suited Christine (and her pony) to perform the journey of three or four miles which divided their dwelling from ours.

Dora Hedworth and I did not, however, become friends in the full sense of the word, though our acquaintance grew to considerable intimacy. She was, at least»

ten years older than I, and I should have felt it presuming to have made any farther advance than was justified by what she appeared to wish, and I soon saw that, notwithstanding the cheerM freedom with which she would, to a certain pomt, discuss all subjects, literary, social, or even local, there was beneath the surface a layer of reserve, proof against all such attempts to penetrate it, as could be ventured on by one who feared or scrupled to offend.

Whether she were really happy in her position, or only desirous out of pride to appear so; whether she were really interested in the pursuits she had taken up since her mother's establishment in their present abode, or had simply had recourse to them to get rid of heavy hours, and to fulfil what might be expected from her, I could never determine, nor could Christine; for a slight circumstance would one day seem to prove the former state of things, while something would occur the next, indicating the latter hypothesis.

Of course there was much wondering among our mutual acquaintances as to how and why it could be that Miss Hedworth, "with all her adFantages," was not married, and many conjectural reasons of sentiment, ambition, interest, and vanity were assigned as possibly solving the problem, though I do not believe that one of those brought forward was founded on any actual knowledge. I did not myself see why she should not be satisfied with her condition as it was ; for she evidently returned her mother's tenderness with grateful warmth, possessed her share of authority in the house, and enjoyed besides, in some respects, even a greater amount of freedom than most married women.

This opinion I expressed one day to Christine, as we were driving home from the Hedworths'; and she observed, in return, "that there was indeed no actual reason or proof against Dora's being as contented as I thought she had cause to be, but that her own impression about her was different ; and that she herself considered it always a pity when a woman, who probably might fill a definite position well, either wasted her best years in pastimes to which she was at heart indifferent, or forced herself into employments which she pursued with only a factitious interest."

I was much disposed to view my own sex as capable of a good deal more independence of existence and action than Christine could alow to be either natural, safe, or possible; and I thought at first that her opinions were only grounded on sentimental notions, illustrated by similes drawn from the elm and yine, &c. ; but I founds as our conversation proceeded, that she had more to say for her impressions (in their general bearings at least) than I had expected. She plainly said that she held the estate of marriage to be nearly as necessary a condition of the calling forth of a woman's qualities of heart and mind after early youth, as a profession is to the advantageous development of a man's character ; and, while she yielded the sincerest respect and admiration to the often unappreciated merit of those women who, fated by Heaven to a single lot, exercise in all humility the merits best tested by their condition, she as sincerely deprecated the folly and ignorance of their own natures, which induced others, through romance, over-niceness, vanity, or rash ambition, so to act as to cut off their chance of having a sphere to move in, which offers a definite position and definite duties.

"For," said she, "if it is often difficult to be as good as one should be, when one does feel exactly what one ought to do, and why, how much more when one is really imcertain of the bounds of one's place, or of the degree in which one's influence or example signifies ! "

"But," answered I, "whichever position may be, in fact, most favourable to womanly perfection, those that have no power of choice must even try to be * as good as they can' in the inferior one."

" Of course," returned she ; " only you, for one, Alswitha, can't fail to have that power. Oh, don't shake your head! I know you saw no one at your mother's, so that part of your life goes for nothing."

"I did see but few people, young or old, it is true; but I was not actually invisible, and I saw quite as many as some women ever do see before their mar-

The Lees of Blenbok Hall. 17

riage, yet no man ever showed me a preierence."

^^ No man? Alswitha!" asked my sister-in-law^ earnestly.

"No man/' repeated L

" Of course I must believe you, returned she, after a pause ; " but when I look at you/' added she, fixing her eyes on me, " it is difficult — difficult, I mean, to understand how it could be."

I felt myself blush from head to foot, partly with pleasure at exciting such disinterested admiration, partly with a sense of humiliation, at guessing that Christine probably attributed my lack of lovers to an indifference I could not boast of ; and, as this feeling prevented my being able to devise any answer at the moment, my sister-in-law, too kind and too well bred to push an uncommunicative friend with questions, pursued the subject no &rther. Neither did she re-

VOL. III. c cur to the topic, even incidentally, till several weeks afterwards, when as something was passing about the extremely unnoticed life that may be led in London, even by those who inhabit its most fashionable quarters, she observed : —

" That she supposed / was an instance of tjiat. For," continued she, "from what you and Godfrey have told me, it would seem no one was ever acquainted with you but that young Mr. Wjmdham."

I replied "that it was very true;" but^ feeling the subject a dangerous one, I gave no handle to Christine for foUowing it up, even supposing such to have been her intention; and she and I were again a long time without coming upon the ticklish question of "how far women have their fate in their own power?" though we not unfrequently discussed what brought us near upon the verge of it ; . and, though I suspect she was^ in her secret soul, eager to ascertain whether my past life had, or had not, really been the blank it was assumed to be.

C 2

Chapter II

Weeks and months passed on with little more change in our daUy habits and employments than what was wrought by the lengthening of the days, by the gradual softening and brightening of the weather, and — as spring advanced — by the renewed beauty of the face of Nature.

I was again able to have recourse to my old occupation of sketching, and, on most fine mornings, after having given little Philip the short lesson in geography, which invariably ended with a request to be shown on the globe "where papa was?" I took my pupil out with me into one of the neighbouring lanes^ and there set to work drawing whatever sheds, stiles, stumps of trees, and ivy-spread cottages I thought most likely to "get my hand in'' again; while my companion was allowed to scamper about right and left, provided he never went beyond certain boundary lines, and provided also that he came back to my side every now and then, to "see if Aunt Alswitha wanted anything."

We could also venture on longer drives owing to the increase of daylight; and the state of the cross-roads and paths had improved so much towards the end of April, that Miss Hedworth, who commonly eschewed all such exercise as involved exposure to mud and lifting up of garments, more than once contrived to reach on foot a half-way point between our respective dwellings, where

I met her, and where we proceeded to try our skill in imitating Nature rather more ambitiously than I, at least, had yet dared to attempt.

These artistic assignations did not, however, occur often, as my new friend was not remarkable for perseverance, and a very slight inconvenience as regarded access, a very small imperfection of temperature as regarded weather, would at any time lead her to give up a sketching plan she had herself proposed, and dilated on ral;her enthusiastically, while under favourable influences of air, sky, and spirits.

"You may see," would Christine observe, ^^that Dora Hedworth has no real love for this kind of employment; she is getting tired of it, as she has got tired of all else, poor thing ! — and I should not wonder if she never touched a pencil again/'

This did not prove literalbf the case;

though Dora's zeal did, indeed, so far relax that our meetings for artistic purposes, when they took place, came to be, on her part, rather opportunities for desultory talk and desultory rambles, than for what she professed to seek, namely ^^ studies for foregrounds;" but I had no objection either to listen to her, or to saunter with her, so found equal pleasure, if not equal improvement, in complying with her fancies, in whatever direction, idle or industrious, they happened to lead her.

Christine and I had by this time been cheered by the arrival of more than one letter from Godfrey. Not having seen any of his written from sea, I could not judge whether there was any difference in their tone from those of former days ; but my sister-in-law observed, that she hardly knew whether to be pleased or vexed to notice that they breathed something less of perfect satisfaction with bis present position^ something more of regret for home and impatience to return, than she had been used to trace in his communications under similar circumstances.

Was that difference caused by a change mere time had made in his spirits ? — or could it be connected with a newly-awakened interest, stronger than the attraction to his own fireside, which drew bun towards England by the more than magnetic influence of an aim to be accomplished, a desire to be gratified, for the attainment whereof his heart beat more eagerly than for the sight of wife or child ?

I knew not, and vainly lost myself in conjectures, which I might not impart to any, and from the involuntary forming of which I was glad to divert my mind, making as much room in it as I could for the interests and feelings of those around me, whether in our household, or among the persons I met casually.

I therefore tried to listen to Mrs. Hedworth with more sympathy than I actually experienced, while she calculated the chances for and against shortly receiving a visit from her son, Captain Hedworth of the — ^th Hussars, and did my best to hide from Dora my suspicion that the young officer (who was her junior by three or four years), might not improbably find London in the beginning of May too pleasant to allow of its being " in his power" to visit the country, when it had no other attraction than its vernal beauty, and the presence of his parent and sister.

It did, however, prove to be " in his power," and I believe I must have wronged him in concluding him inaccessible to affectionate feeling and simple pleasures, for I must say he seemed good-hearted and amiable, not perhaps quite so easy to please as Hugh Wyndham, bat in the main happy-tempered and attached to his family, as well as agreeable and perfectly unaffected in manners.

His mother and sister were, notwithstand* iagy evidently anxious not to test the contentedness of his disposition too severely, for they exerted themselves, more than was quite consistent with their frequent observations on "dear Percy's very quiet tastes/' to add to the gratification their own company might afford him, whatever farther enlivenment to his home visit might be obtained through such social amusement as was within their reach.

I suppose they thought Christine and me capable, in our degree, of contributing to the desired end ; for, though the house at Birkstone was not, in the opinion of its very luxurious inmates, large enough to accommodate many guests, they twice over insisted on our sleeping there, when, as one or two other friends were doing the same, it entailed a good deal of management, and a certain amount of what was, for them, dose packing.

It happened — fortunately for Dora's visible wish to provide her brother with society in that ^'pleasant month of May'' (which is, in the country, the "deadest" in the whole year for everything except fly-fishing) — ^that chance had at that moment brought a few young people into several of the neighbouring houses.

Old Sir William Fiennes had with him his wife's nephew and two nieces; the Wortleys the young cousin, who failing other heirs, was one day to inherit their property ; and the Honey woods, who were generally famous for never having any visitors at all, ha^ opened their doors to an elderly fiiend and her two sons, both evidently addicted to that same sport of fly-fishing.

It was probably a great relief to these various birds of passage, (who, except the fly-fishers, had in all likelihood, expected nothing but dulness in visits paid out of duty to elderly relations,) to find that the family at Birkstone was eager to bring together every young person they could muster, to enliven dinner-parties and picnics, which last were always contrived to take place at some spot near enough to us to be within the powers of our pony. It happened besides, more than once, that their little carriage called to convey me in the morning to Birkstone, where I was picked up by Christine in hers, about sunset ; and, in short, matters were so arranged, that we saw something of them and a little of their other acquaintances, almost daily during Captain Hedworth's stay.

The Lbes of Blendon Hall. 29

He, I must confess, returned with interest all the welcome and courtesy shown to him ; he was besides (though less handsome than Dora) good-looking as well as pleasant mannered, and I thought, on the whole, that his sojourn with his family produced a very agreeable variety in our ordinary mode of existence ; not the less so, perhaps, from its affording me, indirectly, through the parties made up to meet him, either at dinner or for morning excursions, what might be called a sort of adventitious glimpse of more general society.

I was not " enraptured " by it ; possibly because, as Dora Hedworth always averred, "nothing ever could be lively in such a dull neighbourhood;" but more probably because, though such assemblies were as new to me as ' to Lady Fiennes's pretty little niece of seventeen, I was in fact nearly twenty-two, old of my age, and disenchanted with life. Entertaining or not, however, I was pleased to have even thus much sight of what I had hitherto lived shut out from, and glad, too, to talk it over with Miss Hedworth and Christine, though I cannot say that I had thought it delightful enough to find it any terrible loss, when^ our comparatively gay fortnight was brought to a close, by the departure of the guest whose presence

had occasioned this temporary change. I felt sorry for Dora^ who was losing the company of a brother she was both fond and proud of; and I said so to Christine the evening before his departure for London, while we lingered together outside the gate of our little garden, watching the brother and sister as they disappeared down the lane after calling on us.

" So am I, " returned she, " extremely

The Lees of Blekdon Hall. 31

sorry for her. I am sure she feels his going terribly ; but I hardly thought you supposed her to mind it so much."

" She cannot but mind it, " replied I, "for she is evidently much attached to him, and I don't wonder at it ; don't you think him agreeable?" added I, surprised at a sort of puzzled expression that came over her face as I spoke. " I should have thought you would have liked him ex« ceedingly, Christine ! "

" And so I do," she replied ; " but if you also like him," continued she, hesitatingly j "i** IS perhaps the less to be wondered at if — " she stopped short, till on my looking inquiringly at her, she resumed her speech by saying " she thought she saw now, how it was that no one, even among those who had seen me in my old home, had ever particularly attended to me.'*

" Far," proceeded she, " though several people at Mrs. Hedworth's told me how handsome and clever they considered you, I feel sure no man among them would ever have dreamt of showmg you he thought so; since, with your manner, it is only a goose or a coxcomb who would venture on it."

" It's unfortunate for me to be so restricted in my choice, for I am not partial to either,'' replied I.

" You know I don't mean that, Alswitha ! " cried she, " but — but — ^the truth is, it is very difficult to explain what I do mean, for I don't want you to think I should like to see you a flirt; but still,—"

She again hesitated, and I took advantage of her pause to inquire " wheher she meant that I had not talked enough to Captain Hedworth, for instance? Beeause I thought I had, and should be very sorry to think I had been wanting in courtesy/'

"Yes, you talked, and agreeably too; you are neither silent nor airified in company; you have a great deal more manner, indeed, than I should have expected from one who had been so secluded, but still — stm— "

She repeated the words anew without seeming able to get farther, and I asked her smiling, " whether she thought it would have been my duty to have echoed Dora's endeavours to extract from her brother (as he was taking leave of us) a promise of coming back to Birkstone in August ? If he cares to come to his mother's this summer, he is quite sufficiently authorized so to do without any intervention of mine ! Do you really consider that I ought to have helped to press him ? "

VOL, TIL D

34 The Lees of Blekdon Hall.

"Not exactly," said Christine, "though I am not sure Dora didn't wish you to take your part in the entreaty ; but you looked so thoroughly as if you didn't care ! "

"Well, no more I did!''

Christine could not help laughing at what she called my downrightedness, and scrupled, when pushed, to advise my affecting an interest I did not feel ; " only, " proceeded she, "if you want to know precisely what it is I have been remarking in you, I can just indicate what I feel by saying, that had I not known who you were at that party given to the Wortleys, on that afternoon we went with the Fienneses to Thomley Abbey, I should have taken you to be a married woman, or, if I had missed the ring on her finger, I should have settled that you were, or considered yourself, so solenmly engaged as to be all but married."

I felt that what my kind sister-in-law meant, might, if concisely put, be expressed by the words "too self-possessed," which phrase I was very near offering her as an expletive; but, not wishing to go deep, either with her or myself, into the grounds of that self-possession, which had its root in an indifference which might be thought to need explanation, I hastened to get rid of the subject by making some commonplace remarks on "the diflSculty of hitting that precise shade of manner, easy without being familiar, soft without betraying consciousness," which would be, as I was ready to agree with Christine, the perfection of demeanour for one of my age and position.