Too Easily Jealous. An Australian romance

Chapter I

" What a lovely face ! For Heaven's sake, Walter, tell me who she is ! " " Really, Herbert, the sensation aroused by hearing you inquire about a woman, is so delight fully rare, that it tempts me to prolong the excitement." " As rare, doubtless, as the cause which evoked my admiration. But, joking apart, Bevis, tell me the lady's name ; I saw her bow to you." ' She is called Stanhope — Ethel Stanhope, I think — and the father is something in the city. They say he's comfortably off, but has a large family of daughters, and it must take a good income to keep them going. They are not all as pretty as Ethel, though ; or, I daresay, he wouldn't have them long on his hands. The eldest, for instance, is decidedly plain ; goes in for women's rights and all that sort of thing. She wanted to study medicine, I believe, but a ' Too Easily Jealous! 2 the old man wouldn't consent to that, so she lets off the steam by writing for some learned maga zine or other, but that's not exactly in my line ; suit you better, I fancy.

They've got a dance on next week, and, if you like, I daresay I can get you a card ; for, where there's a houseful of girls, men are always at a premium." So rattled on Walter Bevis, stroking his fair moustache complacently the while. His companion listened to all Bevis said, though it was an unusual thing for Philip Herbert to interest himself in social gossip, nor did he even go to dancing parties, and it was with conscious sarcasm that Walter Bevis had made the offer of invitation. But, to his intense surprise, Herbert replied, — " I should be glad if you would. Dancing parties are not in my line I know, but there's something so irresistibly attractive about that face, it tempts one to a further acquaintance." Bevis laughed heartily. " Why, old fellow, this will be a splendid joke against you ; the regiment will never hear the last of it, I warn you.

The grave, the invulnerable Philip Herbert, smitten to the heart's core, by one glance from Ethel Stan hope's brown eyes ; 'pon my soul, it's better than the last new novel." The younger man's mirth jarred a little on his grave companion, as he replied with more of irri tation than the occasion warranted, — " Don't be absurd, Bevis ; besides, you know better, I hope, than to couple a lady's name so lightly with that of a perfect stranger." ' Too Easily Jealous! 3 Bevis felt that he had chaffed enough. "Never mind, Herbert," he said, "the joke shall only be between ourselves ; I'll do my best to get a card for you, if you promise that I shall be best man when the affair comes off." " Granted," said Herbert, anxious to put a stop to the discussion, " but if we are to be at the Zoo at four o'clock, we have no time to lose."

Hailing a passing hansom, the pair jumped in, and in a few moments were on their way to the gardens. Philip Herbert was a young army surgeon, attached to the 220th Regiment, now stationed at Calcutta, and was then home on a year's leave, rendered necessary by a slight sunstroke received at Lucknow some months back. Walter Bevis was a young artillery officer whom Dr Herbert had known from boyhood, and was one of the few friends he had in London — another exemplification of the strong contrast that seems necessary between intimates ; for two men more unlike, in character and disposition, it would be impossible to conceive. While society was the salt of life to the gay hearted, reckless Walter Bevis, who could count up more affaires du cœur than he numbered years of life, Dr Herbert, who was of a shy, reserved, disposition, abjured gaieties of all kinds, and never cared to cultivate the acquaintance of women.

He was at this time about twenty-eight years of age, of middle stature, with a fair English com plexion, tanned by exposure to the Indian sun, and chestnut hair and beard, which he wore rather closely cropped, in a style that imparted ' Too Easily Jealous! 4 tin air of determination to his somewhat resolute countenance. He was passionately fond of his profession, and had already obtained some note therein, and men who knew him intimately, prophesied that he was likely to benefit his pro fession more than his profession would benefit him ; for it was characteristic of the quiet nature of this man, that he undertook few things, but what he did enter upon, was always thoroughly well carried out, at whatever cost to himself. People wondered that a young man, so exemp lary in all the duties and relations of life, and who was, moreover, blest with a small income in addition to his small pay, had not taken to him self a wife long 'ere this, for Herbert was one of the sort who marry young ; but he had little taste for female society, and the exigencies of his profession did not demand marriage, as does a similiar position " unattached."

When bantered upon the subject, he invari ably replied that his profession was his bride ; and, seeing how lightly he regarded the charms of femininity in all ranks and conditions of life, people were disposed to receive his statements with more credulity than is usually accorded to such protestations. But on that day, when strolling carelessly through Bond Street, a fair face, with lus trous dewy eyes, and masses of braided hair, had looked at him from the window of a tiny brougham, blocked in a line of cabs, carriages, and other wheeled vehicles, Herbert felt that his hour had come, and, with an unrestrained recklessness, proceeded to stake the whole of his ' Too Easily Jealous! 5 future happiness on the pursuance of his ac quaintance with the unknown fair one. What a strange, incomprehensible passion is that of love at first sight !

Suddenly — from out a street, a room, a window — a face meets ours ; we see it but for a passing moment — another, and it has flowed on with the restless crowd, apparently, but for us, into the sea of past re membrances. None the less surely do we know that it is inextricably mingled with all our future life, and that, whether for weal or woe, it has become part of our destinies. Few men acknowledge this to themselves, until it has become one of those incontrovertible realities not to be explained away, only to be confessed as amons; the things undreamt of in our material philosophy. I have heard one man gravely acknowledge, that he had an ideal, and that whenever he saw her, he should know that he beheld his future wife. The quiet assurance seemed like a con sciousness of prophetic power or foresight ; but two years later, in a new world, he discovered his ideal, who was certainly lovely enough to lead any man to suppose that he had realised his long sought dream.

As Herbert walked home that evening, through the quiet streets of Bloomsbury, to his lodgings in Russell Square, he mused longingly over his fleeting vision of Ethel Stanhope, and looked forward with as much hopeful eagerness to Bevis's card of invitation as did ever a young debutante to the delights of her first ball. Two or three days passed away, but the ' Too Easily Jealous! 6 promised card had not reached Herbert. He began to fear that Walter Bevis, among the pressure of his numerous engagements, had allowed the whole affair to slip out of his remembrance. Restlessly he turned over his letters and papers, morning after morning, but no sign of anything approaching to Bevis's well-known caligraphy met his eye. He was growing uneasy, and had made up his mind to take an early opportunity of reminding Walter of his promise, when coming in late one evening, he saw lying on the table, in his gloomy sitting room, a square white note, that seemed to make a " sunshine in a shady place."

He took it up, and held it tenderly in his hand for a moment before he opened it, knowing as well as if he had seen it written, that the simple address — Dr Herbert, 220th Regiment, 16 Russell Square. had been penned by the fair fingers of the unknown and unconscious object of his worship. Tenderly, reverently, he kissed the bold free writing, and then, opening the note, read the usual formula. The invitation was for the following Thursday — it was then Monday. Ere he slept, Dr Herbert penned and posted his accept ance of the invitation, and sought his couch with more charitable feelings towards Walter Bevis than he had been able to entertain during the uncertainty of the last two days.

Chapter II

Thursday night came at last, though to Herbert it seemed long in the coming. So it is with these apparently calm, reserved temperaments. Once let the flood-gates be unloosed, and the impetuous torrent pours all the faster and fiercer for the restraint that has so long been exercised. Shortly after nine o'clock, Herbert and Walter Bevis might have been seen making their way up the already crowded staircase of the house at Westbourne Terrace. It was a summer evening in the middle of June, flowers and plants bloomed invitingly along the staircase, and the balconies were smothered in crimson roses ; while the air was heavy with the scent of mignonette and violets, powerful enough to overcome all other odours. To this day Dr Herbert never sees the purple violet, or inhales the sweetness of the hardier mignonette, without a pang of pain, for their fragrance recalls the " tender grace of a day that is dead," and he knows now, too late, that, for him, the light that illumined those past years will never shine again.

His past can never be recalled. Enveloped in a mist of pain and anguish, more bitter than ' Too Easily Jealous! 8 death itself, he stands in remembrance at the gates of his lost happiness ; and, though his cry for forgiveness and repentance might arouse the dead from their slumbers, it can never undo the past, nor call his dead love back to the life of trust and faith that once was theirs. Relentlessly do memory and remorse, those stern guardians of the past, turn him from the gates of his paradise, and send him to wander forth into the cold world of reality, which is all that remains to him. The rooms were crowded, but not incon veniently so, and Dr Herbert (having been duly presented to Miss Stanhope, Walter's strong minded woman, who, by the death of her mother, was the natural head of the house) made the tour of the dancing and drawing-rooms, in search of the one face that memory held for him.

Suddenly, he saw her moving through a set of lancers, her tall form draped in a cloud of trailing misty white, her dark hair wreathed wfith a coronet of white roses, while in her bosom nestled a knot of violets that shed their sweet fragrance around her. It was a lovely face — once seen, never to be forgotten — but there was in the countenance something more than mere grace, and softness of outline, and perfection of colour. There was an indefinable fascination about the dark eyes, and an almost imperial bearing in her form and carriage that would have impressed the most casual observer. Years after, when sorrow and suffering, greater than fall to the ordinary lot of woman, had set their mark upon Ethel Stanhope, I, seeing her for the first time, ' Too Easily Jealous. 9 said unconsciously to myself, " That woman has a history."

A history indeed ; and what history can a woman have, save that of grief and sorrow, for happiness is too monotonous to demand a chronicle, and few can describe the impalpable nothings which go to form the domestic atmo sphere of a perfect love. Dr Herbert watched her from afar, with a sense of dreamy contentment wholly foreign to his usual practicability. He felt no anxiety for the termination of the dance, though he longed for an opportunity of speaking to her ; no jealousy of her partner mingled with his satisfaction, any more than if she had been his wife. He was content to watch her there and bide his time. The man's volition was intense. He believed in himself, and, despite the common-sense estimate in which he held himself, he felt convinced, with out overrating his own powers, that ere he was many months older, he should call Ethel Stanhope his wife, and knowing this, he was content to wait.

Like all things mortal, the dance came to an end ; the last notes died into silence, to be succeeded by the hum of busy promenaders who crowded the refreshment-room, or sought the coolness of the balcony. In the dispersion, Her bert encountered Walter. " I've been looking for you, Bevis. Pray introduce me to Miss Stanhope." They turned ; she stood not far from them, looking, Herbert thought, like a piece of Greek sculpture against the crimson draperies of the windows, which caused her white dress and graceful figure to stand out in bold relief. ' Too Easily Jealous! 10 " Miss Stanhope, allow me to introduce my friend, Dr Herbert," said Bevis. Ethel turned and bowed, and Herbert's heart beat more quickly as her glance fell upon him. She received him kindly, and but few words had passed between them before he felt himself again.

There were only a few moments to spare before her next partner came to carry her away, but in that short interval he had managed to say,— " I am not much of a dancer, Miss Stanhope, but if you will kindly pilot me through the mazes of the next quadrille, I shall be deeply grateful." Ethel had assented ; and, in spite of knowing that Bevis's quizzical looks were fixed upon him, Herbert actually went through the ordeal credit ably enough, — unaware that W alter, who stood at a little distance, apparently only leaning against the mantelpiece, was in reality illuminating the obverse of his programme with a pencil-sketch of the incredible fact. Ethel, on her part, felt interested in her new acquaintance. There was an unconscious straight forwardness in his manner that was refreshing enough to be agreeable.

Moreover, Dr Herbert had absolutely no small talk, and did not go out enough to learn the social topics of the day, and was consequently more original in the matter of his conversation. The quadrille was not over before Ethel found herself drawn into an ani mated discussion, which interested her so much that she sat out the next dance rather than break the argument. Before they parted, Herbert had ' Too Easily Jealous! 11 asked and obtained permission to call, and slept that night with all the satisfaction of a man who sees himself in a fair way to realise his heart's desires. . Despite herself, Ethel found herself thinking many times on succeeding days of the grave, yet interesting stranger ; and when, one afternoon, the maid announced " Dr Herbert," as she sat alone in the drawing-room, she started guiltily, feeling how constantly he had been in her thoughts.

Her sisters were all out attending a flower show, under Dorothea's chaperonage, for the household had been many years motherless, so Ethel was really alone that morning ; and Dr Herbert felt that the fates had vouchsafed him more encouragement than is granted to adoring swains, in permitting him an opportunity such as might rarely occur in the course of a longer acquaintance than theirs. There is no need to linger over the early phases of their growing attachment ; suffice it to say that Philip Herbert's volition carried the clay, and ere three months had elapsed from the memorable hour of their first meeting, he was received as the acknowledged lover of Ethel Stanhope. Mr Stanhope, himself a man of the old school, was pleased that he should have been asked for his daughter by a young man of such confessed steadiness in the past and promise for the future ; while Dorothea's heart had been com pletely won by the appreciative interest he manifested in all her contributions to the ' Too Easily Jealous! 12 Woman's Progress Review.

Having so easily made a place for himself in the esteem of _ these two heads of the numerous household, it is not surprising that he should find himself cordially received — as a brother, indeed — by the bevy of younger sisters who went to complete the Stan hope family, and who rejoiced in the idea of the notoriety that would be attached to themselves in the all-important role of bridesmaids. They were going to Brighton for a month, and after their return the marriage was to be celebrated, for Dr Herbert's leave would expire at the be ginning of the New Year, and it was incumbent on him to rejoin his regiment shortly. So all was settled. The sisters revelled in shopping to their hearts' content, and held mysterious conclaves on the subject of the most suit able wedding present that their pocket-money could by any manner of means be held to afford.

The house was invaded at all hours by dress makers and drapers' parcels, " and time and the hour sped on to bring the happy day " that was to bind Philip Herbert and Ethel Stanhope together, " so long as they both should live." It was a very gay wedding, indeed ; the girls wished it, and Ethel was too proudly calm to care how many stood by to witness her plight her troth to the man she had so willingly accepted for her future husband. No con sciousness of a deep, intense passion ruffled the smooth serenity of her mind ; she only felt that she was doing a wise and right thing in choosing Philip Herbert for her future companion and guide. It was not till years after that the ' Too Easily Jealous! 13 deep, unfathomable well of passion gushed up, and she learned to know a love she had little recked of then.

But with him it was different ; he felt that the supreme moment of his life had come ; and as he heard the words which gave her to him until death should part them, he was proudly exultant, and dreamt not that the coming years would cast one shadow on his path, now that he had realised the haunting dream which gave him the love of his life to have and to hold for ever.

Chapter III

" Tlie bridal is over, the guests are all gone, And the bride's only sister sits weeping alone." Not the only sister in reality, for, as has already been intimated, the Stanhopes were a numerous family, consisting, for the grown-up part, entirely of girls ; but Gertrude was Ethel's favourite sister and confidante, and the parting between them was the one drop that embittered the cup of Ethel's happiness. With all the members of her family the part ing must of necessity be a sad one, but to lose Gertrude was something more than this ; it was the loss of her daily friend and companion, to whom scarcely a thought had been uncommuni cated during their short lives. Naturally, Ethel felt it less than Gertrude, for was she not going to know that sweeter and more entire com panionship of two lives, whose thread was hence forth to be woven in one ; and, instead of the familiar advice of her sister, was she not to lean upon the adoring guidance of one in whom her eyes could discern no flaw or speck that should make mute the music of their wedded lives ?

So it was upon Gertrude that the blow fell in all the freshness of its intensity. ' Too Easily Jealous! 15 In the excitement of the wedding preparations she had scarcely realised all that the expected event would bring to her, until the last carriage wheels had rolled away, and she went up to the familiar chamber, so long shared with Ethel, to find it empty — the bridal finery on the bed only too suggestive of the scene of the morning which had robbed her of her sister. She sat down and cried very bitterly, too, as girls are apt to do when the reaction comes after some great excitement, and wished that there had been no wedding and no Dr Herbert to come and carry away her beautiful sister. She would not have minded the wedding so much, she thought, had it not been for the dreadful voyage to India.

Indeed, Gertrude began to think that it would have been rather pleasant than otherwise to have had Ethel domiciled in a cosy little house not many streets from them, where she, Gertrude, might spend long mornings with her sister, undisturbed by the presence of Dr Herbert, whom she was sure she would never learn to call Philip ; and in future years help to nurse Ethel's babies, and be, in fact, a sort of perennial Aunt Gertrude. For, of course, this young lady had quite made up her mind that she could never marry, and go away from papa and home and everybody, as Ethel had done, with a complete stranger. For Gertrude was a shy, reserved little maiden, with a loving heart of her own : not beautiful, like her splendid sister, to all the world without, but only to the little circle within ; quite unaccus tomed to any sort of homage whatever, save the ' Too Easily Jealous! unconscious homage that Ethel paid her by always deferring to her opinion in spite of her youth, and never feeling wholly comfortable without that silent endorsement.

Ethel knew but one weak spot in her sister's armour : it was the faintest suspicion of a tend ency for Walter Bevis, who, in his turn, was quite unconscious, and equally unworthy, of the little brown maiden's adoration. It could have been nothing but the utter dissimilarity of character between these two that was the foundation of any liking, on the part of one so habitually reserved and shy, for this gay, rattle pated, "long sword, saddle and bridle" young officer. But in order that there may be no secrets, so far, between the reader and the writer, it may be as well to mention that Walter Bevis is not to be Gertrude's husband ; for, of course, she did marry hereafter, and her choice proved to be worthy of her wise and gentle judgment. We have lingered longer than may seem necessary over so unpretending a character as that of our second part heroine, but we shall learn much of her and her husband hereafter, and I wish to paint her image clear upon the mental vision of the reader,for she was one of those true-hearted women whom we so seldom meet — perfectly humble and unselfish in her estimation of self, loyal in trouble, and self-denying to a fault.

In person she was short and small, with brown eyes, and a wealth of brown hair, which she always wore, regardless of fashion, twisted in thick coils around her well shaped head. Such was Ger- ' Too Easily Jealous! 17 trude Stanhope before the knowledge of any love, save that of innocent sisterly affection, had come to develop or mature her, before she had trodden upon the threshold of that empire wherein, as wife and mother, she was to hold complete and fitting sway. But, as yet, she was somewhat puritanic, crude, and harsh, with that severe code and high standard that only the very young and very inexperienced ever hold. To have a high standard is well, but to make it a bed of Procrustes, with no allowance for temptation or surroundings, this was Gertrude's one fault, and time, sorrow, and experience had not yet taught her the lessons which soften while they sting.

The honeymoon at last passed away, and the looked for hour of meeting drew on, when, for the first time in her remembrance, Ethel Herbert, was welcomed to her old home with much of noisy and boisterous delight. Always calm and dignified in manner, marriage had but heightened the serenity of her bearing, so that there was very little outward change in Mrs Herbert ; but the sisters, one and all, declared that their new brother-in-law was wonderfully improved. Dorothea's was the only voice raised in opposi tion to this heresy ; to her he had always been a model man. But Gertrude was not slow to per ceive a softness and tenderness of manner, before unknown, and it was touching to see the way in which his eyes followed Ethel's every look and movement. " My wife, my very own," seemed to be the one idea that pervaded his being, until Gertrude herself was ready to forgive him for B ' Too Easily Jealous! 18 stealing Ethel from them, and even felt that she, too, might learn gratitude towards one hitherto regarded as a stranger, for the sake of the wealth of love he lavished on her sister.

And it served to reconcile her somewhat to the dreaded parting, for even in those happy hours of re-union Ger trude felt, what every unmarried woman must learn sooner or later, that there is no friendship like that of marriage, and when once that love has stepped in, all lesser affections must bow before its sway. And thus Gertrude learnt, painfully enough, her first life's lesson. Long and often did she ponder on the mystery of this unknown power, that could, in a few short months, transfer the tried affections of the past to rest upon an un tried love, which might bring undying woe, equally with perfect happiness, in the far off future. So the hour came at last. Good-byes and parting words were said, and Ethel was loaded with presents from her many friends, until Dr Herbert began to be almost jealous of the esteem in which his young wife was held.

He longed for the moment that was to sever her from home and kindred, when they two should stand to gether alone upon the deck of that outward bound vessel which was to carry them to the far off land, where the greater part of their lives must necessarily be spent. The last bell rang, the last handkerchief flut tered in the breeze, as, with a favourable wind, the Nebraska sailed gaily down Southampton Waters, and Ethel was at last fairly embarked on her voyage of life. Shall we blame her, that salt tears dimmed her beautiful eyes, and a pas- ' Too Easily Jealous! 19 sionate sense of pain (was it a presentiment of some unknown fear) lingered at her heart, even while the white cliffs lessened from her sight, and the dreary waste of grey waters unrolled itself before her wondering gaze.

Chapter IV

The India of thirty or forty years ago was a terra incognita compared with that of the pre sent day. No weekly mails bridged the great gulf which separated England from her eastern possessions. Tourists were unknown, and vessels trading to the different ports only carried thither persons who had chosen India for their future home, or those who had, for the sake of some valuable appointment, accepted years of exile as the price to be paid for the chance of some day returning in ease and comfort to their native land. No wonder then that Ethel thought her self dreaming still when, on the morning after her arrival in Calcutta, she first opened her eyes upon the lofty but barely furnished rooms, whose matted floors and swaying punkahs were to her equally strange and curious. The sights visible from her windows came to remind her that she was indeed a sojourner in a strange land, as she watched with amusement the groups of natives assembled at the large square tanks of water, beneath the shade of lofty trees, or gazed upon a procession of elephants now bearing aloft in their howdahs groups of important personages, or ladened with burdens of ponderous weight.

But, in the natural vivacity of youth, these strange ' Too Easily Jealous! 21 surroundings only lent an added charm to her new life, and although it was some time before she could overcome her repugnance to the attendance of native servants, yet by the time their pretty bungalow was got in order for their use, she had begun to look upon India as her home, and wrote volumes for transmission to Gertrude, the postage upon which was something beyond calculation. Indeed, Dr Herbert used to declare, laughingly, that his wife's stationery and postal expenses were equivalent to most ladies' pin money. But there was no jealousy in those days, although he did sometimes grudge the time Ethel spent over her letters. The cloud, no bigger than a man's hand, had not yet arisen to dim the most distant horizon of their happiness.

On the contrary, Dr Herbert enjoyed the admiration excited among his regi mental friends by his fair young wife, little dreaming that the very admiration he now coveted for her was destined to become the Upas tree of his life. They were sitting at breakfast one morning, about two years after their marriage, when a servant entered bearing the morning's post, which he laid before Dr Herbert, and, making the usual salaam, withdrew. " Letters, English letters, Ethel. What will you give me for your share ? " asked her husband, laughing at the eager way in which she stretched out her hand to receive the packet. " There are not likely to be any for you, so you may as well give me my property at once," said Ethel. ' Too Easily Jealous! 22 " You are mistaken ; here is a bulky packet addressed to me in Dorothea's handwriting."