Just in Time: or, Howard Clarion's Rescue

Front matter

IV, BY THE SAME AUTHOR. I. DAISY SNOWFLAKE'S SECRET. A Story of English Home Life. Crown 8vo, cloth, elegantly bound, 5s. II. OUR BROTHERS AND SONS. Third Thousand. Crown 8vo, cloth, 3s. 6d. III. OUR DAUGHTERS: Their Lives Here and Hereafter. Seventh Thousand. Crown 8vo, cloth, 3s. 6d. MORNING THOUGHTS FOR OUR DAUGHTERS. Cloth, is. 6d. V. FOUND AT LAST. Fcap. 8vo, cloth, is. VI. LITTLE GLORY'S MISSION. Fcap. 8vo, cloth, is. VII. UNSPOKEN ADDRESSES. sFcap. 8vo? cloth, is. VIII. NOT ALONE IN THE WORLD. Fcap.. Svo, cloth, is. IX. NUMBER FOUR, AND OTHER STORIES. Fcap. 8vo, cloth, is. X. CH I P PINGS. Fcap. Svo, cloth, is. London : Hodder & Stoughton, 27, Paternoster Row. OR, Jpotoarb Clarion's Rescue. BY MRS. G. S. REANEY, Author of "DAISY SNOWFLAKE'S SECRET," " OUR lfAUGHTERS," ETC. "When all else fails, Love saves." : HODDER AND STOUGHTON, 27, PATERNOSTER ROW. MDCCCLXXXIV. (All rights reserved.) Printed by Hazel. , Watson, & Viney, Limited, London and Aylesbury. CONTENTS.

A SUFFERING LIFE. I

Chapter I

A SUFFERING LIFE. What 'tis to love ! How want of love tormenteth ! ' s\ ONT, Master Howard! Leave off whining, do ! I never knew such a child in my life ! If you're not that wild with your high spirits that there's no bearing your noise, you are sure to be fretting and whimpering." And the speaker looked very angrily at the said Master Howard, who shrank from her glance, uttering, by way of protestation, a plaintive, — " Don't, Nurse." " I'll ' Don't, Nurse ' you," said that individual, now fairly angry, starting up from her seat, and giving the poor little culprit a hearty shake " Quiet, sir ! This very minute ! I'll stand no nonsense, that I won't!" And as if the shake she had administered was not quite enough, she gave poor little Howard a sharp box upon his ears. At that moment the nursery door opened, and a tall lady, handsomely dressed in black velvet and point lace, entered the room.

" Well, Howard, in disgrace, as usual," she said, as she stooped over the child (who was sitting upon the edge of his chair in a con dition of suppressed sobbing), and coldly touched his forehead with her lips. " I wonder," she added with a sigh, " when you are going to be a good boy ? I am quite tired of hearing Nurse complain of you. You cannot come down to dessert again to-night. What has he been naughty about, Nurse ? " " Oh ! I need not trouble you by telling you, ma'am," said Nurse, with a bland smile ; " it's well, ma'am, I was born with a patient temper, or I never could put up with it. He is always whining and whimpering about something — always. I am that gentle with him, that I astonish myself sometimes ; but there, it's no credit to me : I was of a cheerful and forbearing disposition from my birth.

But I tell him sometimes, ma'am, if he happened to have a nurse now as whipped him, he would soon find the difference, that he would!" And Nurse drew herself up with dignity. " I would rather be flogged than shook and ear-boxed," said poor little Howard, with a big sob, making a desperate effort to bring his sufferings before his mother, although with little hope that it would prove of any use. " There now, ma'am, would you believe it now ? " asked Nurse, colouring up with virtuous indignation. " That's Master Howard's mean way of leading you to suppose that I don't always treat him kindly. But there, ma'am, I needn't justify myself with you ! You know what I put up with, and if the little gentleman loves to be untruthful, well — we understand, do we not, ma'am ? — it is only part of a character which at the best is one of the tiresomest possible to be managed."

Mrs. Clarion smiled kindly upon the nurse. Oh ! what would little Howard have given for a smile half as kind all his very own ! " Naughty little boys," said Mrs. Clarion, holding up her finger impressively, and looking sternly at her son of six and a-half years old — " Naughty little boys cannot go to heaven : I hope you will never forget that fact, Howard." And without another word she turned and glided from the room, her long velvet train sweeping gracefully behind her. Nurse only waited to close the door, then going up to little Howard, she took him by the shoulders and shook him until he fairly gasped for breath. " Now, sir, I'll teach you to say a word against me again," she said, white with passion. " Off to bed this very minute ! Supper — supper — sir! how dare you suggest such a thing?

No! fifty thousand times, no ! And you'll have to put yourself to bed, too, in the dark, that you will, sir!" And scarcely knowing what she did, Nurse, working herself up to a state of positive fury, pushed little Howard into the inner nursery, and banged the door behind her, leaving the poor little man, trembling from head to foot, all alone in the dark. A lamp in the stable-yard gave a certain light, and as the blinds were not yet drawn, poor little Howard managed to find his way to his own little bed ; but his knees knocked together, and his teeth shook with positive fear. He shut his eyes while he tried to undress himself, fearing that he might see some shadows on the wall, which Nurse had one night told him were " Satan's bad angels come to see if there were any naughty little boys to be taken away by them."

He managed to get off his knickerbocker suit, but his heart misgave him before he could get any further, and without any more prepara tion he crept into bed, hiding his head under the bed-clothes ; and not until then feeling at liberty to give vent to his pent-up grief. To go to sleep was impossible. Poor little Howard lay and sobbed — sobbed until his head ached terribly. The first thing to happen which diverted him from his sorrow was the drawing down of the blinds. In an instant Howard's little head came up above the bed-clothes, " Susan, Susan, is that you ? " he said, in a hushed whisper. "Yes, Master Howard," replied Susan gently, coming up to the side of his little bed. " I thought you were asleep," she added, sitting down on the bed, and putting her arm round Howard's neck. (Oh ! how it comforted him !)

" But what does this mean ? you are not un dressed." Howard made answer by bursting into tears, and it took a little time to grow sufficiently calm to tell his story. He had a sure sym pathiser in Susan : she was the under-housemaid, an honest, good girl, whose heart was daily troubled by what she called, in speaking of it at home, " poor little Master Howard's suffering life." Susan's own tears fell fast while Howard told his sorrowful tale. " Yes, it is a shame, Master Howard, darling ! " she whispered, giving him a very warm kiss upon his fevered little cheek. " Susan is so sorry for you. If she could she would bear all Nurse's shakings and boxes on the ear for you. But there, there, dearie ! it won't last for ever ; the good Lord Jesus will take care of you, and send one of His angels to deliver you !

" " But you have told me that before, Susan," said Howard, sobbing again, " and I think he is a long, long time coming. Oh ! Susan, I know I am wicked ; Nurse says I am, and mamma says I am, so it won't hurt much if I do say something dreadful ; it won't keep me out of heaven, because — because mamma told me to-night I was not going there ; but, Susan, I do hate, hate, HATE Nurse, and if I were a man I would fight her, that I would ! " " Hush, hush, Master Howard, dear," said Susan soothingly. Nurse was down at her supper, or Susan would have been in terror as to the consequences of this speech — " Hush, darling, don't say such dreadful things. To begin with, you are not wicked. You often say and do naughty things, I know, but you don't like doing than. Now right down wicked people love their bad ways ; and, Master Howard, you are going to heaven some day.

The good Lord Jesus loves you ! Yes ! He really does, and He is so sorry for you ; and some day, when you know all about what He s done to make you good, you will love Him too ; and the more you love Him, the better you will be, for it's loving Him that will make you get fit to be with Him in heaven." " It must be nice to be loved," said Howard, in subdued tones. " I mean always loved. Mamma only loves me sometimes. She loved me on my birthday, and let me sit on her knee and look at a book, and eat chocolate creams. Oh ! Susan, it was nice, only I knew it couldn't last. Whenever the clock struck I knew my birthday was getting over, and that made me afraid to be glad. But wouldn't it be nice to live in heaven ? — I mean, if I ever did get good enough, — and sit on Jesus' knee all day long ?

For if He loved me very much He wouldn't mind, would He ? Or perhaps if some other little boys wanted to be nursed, He would ask one of the angels to hold me for Him. Oh ! Susan, but I do like to think of it ; only supposing, supposing I grow really wicked, for in my heart I do hate Nurse, and I know that isn't being good " " Poor little man ! " said Susan soothingly. " Ask the Lord Jesus to make you love Nurse, and then maybe it would all come different like. Do you know there was a good man once whose name was Stephen, and he had lots of enemies ; they threw big stones at him, and that was ten times worse than being shaken, Master Howard, or having your ears boxed. These large stones hurt him, oh ! dreadfully ; but what do you think he did ? Why, he actually prayed for the men who threw them, asking God to forgive them.

Now, Master Howard, dear, don't you think you could pray for Nurse ? It really would help you ever so much. Come now, shut your eyes, and we will offer up a little prayer together, shall we ? I'll speak, and you'll pray in your heart." And gliding down upon her knees beside Howard's bed, still holding his little hands fast in her own, Susan prayed — " Gentle Jesus, we are so glad you love us, always love us ; please help us to be good. We know you died upon the cross to save us ; and if everybody hated little Howard, You would love him still. Let the dear child feel the comfort of it all ; and don't, please, let him hate Nurse any more than he can help. Let him be a good, forgiving little boy outside of heaven, that he may be a happy little boy, a real bright angel, inside of heaven some day, for Jesus Christ's sake.

Amen." Howard threw both arms round Susan's neck, and gave her a long, loving hug. " Oh ! Susan, if you were my nurse, I'm sure I should be good," he said, feeling the power of her prayer. Susan's words and prayers were the only direct religious teaching Howard ever had in which, as a child, he could believe. His mother heard him his Catechism every Sunday afternoon ; but she generally gaped a good deal, as if the whole proceeding was very wearisome, and Howard felt it was a dreary task, and was eager for its ending. Nurse enforced the morning and evening prayer ; but as her young charge knew nothing in her life to correspond with her care in this respect, and as he never saw her kneel in prayer herself, it was to him a matter of empty form. Indeed, "saying his prayers" represented to Howard doing something which belonged either to dress ing or undressing — the last finishing touch of his toilet in the morning, the concluding arrangement of taking off his things at night.

Alas ! to how many children left to the care of unchristian nurses prayer is nothing more than this. Here surely we may discern, with out undue severity in our criticism, the seeds of that scepticism which with so many in early manhood develops into vigorous growth — a tree which bears fruit in a daily life, indifferent to religious thought, ever querying the truth of Christian belief as professed by others. Little Howard never thought of Susan's prayers — and this was not by any means the first one he had listened to — as he thought of his own said under Nurse's direction. Susan, in some way undefinable to the little boy, was so like her prayers. They only seemed as the audible utterance of her life in all its gentle thoughtful ways. In a word, Susan's life and her prayers seemed to fit into each other.

A movement in the nursery spoke of Nurse's return. Susan rose from her knees, gently kissed Howard, and very softly found her way — for she had no candle all this time — to the door opening on to the corridor. Howard settled himself upon his pillows, and was soon fast asleep, dreaming a troubled dream, in which he moaned uneasily. By-and bye the troubled dream gave place to one in which an angel of mercy came to carry him away from the reach of the naughty spirit who had been frightening him — away, right away into heaven, where he would be quite safe, and nothing could by any possibility come near to hurt him. Strangely enough, the angel's face was Susan's. IV AR DS MOTHER.

Chapter II. Howard's Mother

" Reflect that life, like ev'ry other blessing, Derives its value from its use alone." ITTLE Howard's mother was very much admired in society. Her presence at dinner party or "at home" always insured the evening passing off well. She possessed a fine contralto voice, and gave most unaffectedly, when asked, the " latest songs " in the best style. In addition to this she had brilliant conversational powers, and talked well upon all the popular topics of the day, her original wit greatly enlivening the occasion in question, whatever it might be. Her husband — some few years her senior, and a little deaf — would hover about her admiringly, laughing most heartily at her jokes, coinciding in all her opinions, and now and again, if by any chance she remained a little silent, allowing someone else to take the lead in conversation, rousing her to her "neglected duty" by a gentle — " Come, Caroline, what have you to say about that ?

" At home Mrs. Clarion was quite a different woman. She spent most of her time in reading, took little interest in her children, and kept her servants at an awed distance. Even her husband was painfully conscious of the fact that his wife shone best amongst strangers. With him at home she was often somewhat fretful and snappish, and only displayed real pleasure and interest in his doings as he minis tered directly or indirectly to her own vanity. A man of large means, Mr. Clarion was very lavish in his expenditure upon his home and his wife. All the latest improvements of heat ing must be introduced into conservatory and greenhouse ; any new flower or shrub which had suddenly appeared on the botanical horizon must be purchased, however great the cost, and transported to Kingdale Park. Mrs. Clarion Howard ' s Mother. 19 knew just enough about plants, and the way they should be grown, to be able to conduct her visitors through the gardens and green houses, and point out to them some new improvement or importation, getting all the reward she coveted when the comment would be made quite naturally — " This is the first of anything of the kind which I have seen."

Mrs. Clarion's weakness was to be first : first as the leader of fashion in the neighbourhood in which she lived ; first amongst her friends in the display of trinkets — a weakness her husband continued to keep alive by his frequent and costly gifts ; first in her ability to start and sustain a clever argument when in the society of those worth arguing with ; first in all matters which related to the small world in which she reigned as queen, excepting in regard to her children. She had no ambition to be first with them until they reached an age when she could take them into society with her, and be proud of them there. Howard was the youngest of six — all boys. He was only going through the discipline his five brothers had shared. Left to nurses or morning governesses from infancy, until such an age when they could find companionship with the stable-boys and gardeners ; sent away to a public school when about eleven or twelve, winning a place in the mother's affections as they distinguished themselves there for ability or manliness, and finally, at sixteen or seventeen, being introduced to the world as " my Ernest," " my Henry," " my Albert," as if suddenly the mother's heart had discovered some very special interest in her boy, who until now had been little more than a stranger to her — this had been the experience of Howard's brothers.

There was a difference of eight years between Howard and the next, hence this poor little man's sorrows had been somewhat increased. No playmate, no one to share his nursery life, there were days when Howard felt his existence almost unbearable. Naturally gifted with very high spirits, he would at times make fun for himself, often finding sport in Nurse's evident annoyance, as he hid her work or some of its Howard's Mother. 21 appliances ; but in proportion to his high spirits so great was the depression when he felt tired and irritated. At such times he would fret and " whine," and gain for himself Nurse's severest displeasure. Oh ! how little Howard longed for some friend — a real friend, upon whose knee he could sit and pour out his trouble. Oh ! what perfect happiness it would have been to him at that time if he had had a sister (Susan had read him story-books about other little boys having sisters—why shouldn't lie have one ?), or if one of his big brothers had condescended to take more notice of him than to pat his head if he chanced to meet with him (they never came into his nursery), with the remark — " Well, little chap, and what have you got to say for yourself ?

" Howard had a great deal to say for himself, but nobody cared to listen. Nobody ? Oh ! yes, Susan did. Susan was Howard's best friend and his good angel. " Mamma didn't like little boys, she was always afraid of their treading upon her dress, or getting into her way, and papa was deaf and didn't want to be worried ; but Susan was always kind," only she came to the nursery so seldom, and even those visits could never be depended upon. Poor little Howard ! While cause and effect are so closely bound up together, while reaping days only harvest in the ripened grain sowing days have planted, what can be the future career of a life so utterly neglected in child hood ? Starving for love, pining for friendship, awakening powers of mind and body needing guidance, the mother arms of loving influence to nurse them tenderly as one by one they come into existence, what lies before a life so left to itself at the starting ?

Left to itself, not because stern Fate ushered it into the world friendless, then there might have been some hope, for to have been beyond the possibility of possession would, at least, have tem pered the lacking ; but with suffering intensified, because hungry and unsatisfied in the very midst of all the young heart so intensely craved. Oh ! mothers, mothers, would that Howard Howard ' s Mother. 23 Clarion was the only child of whom it might be said, " The seeds of ruin were sown in nursery days ! " It was Sunday. Little Howard liked Sundays, for Susan took charge of him in the evening while Nurse went to church. It was at these times that Howard heard the story-books which made him desire so much to possess a sister, and many other things which belonged to the home-life of some people, but not to his.

Howard had been to church in the morning with his father and mother and two elder brothers ; his second and third brother were away at school, and the eldest of all never went to church, — why, Howard could not ima gine, unless it was that when big brothers were clever enough to smoke fat cigars, and read those yellow-covered books with the dreadful pictures outside, they had no time to be good and go to church. Howard did not altogether care about church himself. He grew tired of sitting still, and he was afraid to move lest his mother should give him one of her frowns. No one frowned like his mamma did ; she seemed to speak a whole page of reproof in her one look. " Naughty little boy ! . . . How dare you ? . . . You'll be punished for this when you get home "... and other warnings with which Howard was more or less familiar in actual speech.

Howard had made up his mind that when he was a man, old enough to do as and what he liked without any one to tell him to do things, he should never go to church ; and " when he had little, boys of his own, as of course he meant to have some day, when he could be an engine-driver and earn enough money to have a house of his very own, and Susan (or some one as kind as she was) was his wife, he should not make them go to church, or if they did they might talk as much as they liked, if they could not understand what the clergyman was saying. Perhaps if all the little boys in the church began to talk, the clergy man would tell them a story, or talk about what they could understand, just to keep them quiet. Of course, if little boys always sat still, the clergyman quite forgot they were there Howard ' s Mother. 25 and that's why he didn't speak to them from the pulpit."

This was Howard's way of looking at things, but that morning a new clergyman had been preaching — quite a young man, a friend of the Rector's — and he had said in the middle of his sermon : " And now, children, listen ; I have a little word for you. Of course I have, because you are to go to Heaven as well as big people. You love the very name of Heaven, now, do you not ? I heard once of two little chil dren who were playing at stage coaches. Maudie was perched up upon some cushions, which were placed upon two chairs meant to represent a carriage, you know. She was only three years old, but could be very dignified, could this little Maudie. She leant back as she had seen her mamma do in driving in her own carriage, and whenever her little brother of five, who was ' making believe ' that he was driver, cracking his whip and urging his horses to ' Go on, Neddy ; good Neddy '—he did not touch his horses with the whip to behave cruelly to them, for you know even in their play children must not be unkind and unthoughtful — whenever little Johnny reached a town and pulled up his horses, calling out the name of the place, little Maudie would say, in a voice of command : ' Dive on, Donny ! ' and away would go the whip, and there would be more ' Gee up, Neddy ; good Neddy,' until having called out the names of all the towns he could remember — Leeds, York, Liverpool, London, and some half-dozen besides — Johnny called the next stopping-place ' Heaven,' and little Maudie, instead of saying as usual, ' Dive on, Donny,' said, ' Top, Donny, 'top !

Det out here, p'ease ! ' Little Maudie, you see, thought Heaven the very best and sweetest name of all ; and I am sure you little boys and girls do too, if I could only read your hearts. But listen, dear children, — even little boys and girls have to be made ready to live in Heaven ; they need new hearts, hearts that are quite pure from naughty thoughts and feelings and desires. It says in the good Book, ' Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.' That means, you know, the Howard ' s Mother. 27 clean in heart. If you had a great deal of scribbling upon your slate, and you took a sponge with a little water in it, you could wash it all off, could you not ? Now your hearts have to be made clean from all the scribble and strokes of naughty thoughts and ways, and it is only the Lord Jesus can do it.

Have you asked Him to do it ? Will you ask Him ? Would you not like to know that He is waiting to make you good, not only that you may go to Heaven when you die, but that you may live a happy, useful life here ? Dear young friends, begin at once ; begin to-day. Think about the Lord Jesus, not only morning and night when you say your prayers, but all day long. When you are at your play think of the Lord Jesus, and it will make you kind and considerate and unselfish : willing for others to be first, too honourable to cheat or do mean things. Think of Him at your lessons, and your lessons will be learnt, not skimmed over. Think of Him when you are tempted to be angry with other people, or when you feel in your heart that you hate anybody " Howard had followed the young clergyman so far, but that part of his sermon came home to him so fully that he could think of nothing beyond.

He was talking about it to Susan that evening — she had been present, it having been her turn out in the morning. " Oh ! Susan," said Howard, despairingly ; " you know I do pray and I do try, but it does not make me love Nurse any the better." " It will come in time, Master Howard," said Susan, with a big sob ; " perhaps some day when I have gone away, if we ever meet again, you will be able to tell me, ' Susan, I love Nurse now, I really do ! ' " and Susan's tears fell fast. " When you have gone away, Susan ! " ex claimed Howard, looking aghast. " Yes, Master Howard," said Susan, now crying very bitterly ; " I've had my notice, and I've got to leave you. There, I think it would have been better if I had not told you, but I wanted you to hear it from me, Master Howard, or else you might not know the cause.

Nurse thinks — or says she thinks — I was rude Howard ' s Mother. 29 to your mamma, and that's why I am leaving. But, Master Howard dear, I wasn't rude, only I had to speak ,up about something, and your mamma said I had better go, so I have to go ; but, Master Howard dear " " What, Susan ? " said Howard. The child was trembling from head to foot, and his eyes were full of unshed tears. " You know," continued Susan, " the Lord Jesus Christ has said somewhere in the Bible, ' I will never leave thee nor forsake thee.' " Howard stood utterly speechless. Susan had been more to him in the twelve months of her stay than any other human being. To know she was in the house — although he barely saw her on some days from morning until night — was something ; to feel that if everybody else misunderstood him, or passed him without notice, Susan always was kind, and when the opportunity came was sure to soothe him in any special trouble — to be taught in words he could understand of the Lord Jesus until he felt it all to be quite real, quite true, because Susan was so happy and good, — all this made Susan's going away a real calamity to little Howard.