Notes of travel and life

Front matter

NOTES

OF

TRAVEL AND LIFE

Letter I

Ellisburgh, X. Y

Heigh-ho ! for an expedition ! a flight — a new page in the life of your humble friend. But, dear Jane, don't start with fear that I am going to attempt an aerial flight, or that I utter this from a deep faith that the millennium is nigh at hand when the spirit shall take its transit from mortality in triumph ; or that the new page in my hitherto peaceful life is that most important one in woman's existence — the one which embraces so large a portion of her heart's history ; or that I have conceived any heroic scheme to make myself a martyr to some dreamed-of good, of which the future will tell its blessedness, and coming generations give glory to the author as their benefactor; or that I am dressed in that unique style so essential to a fashionable travelling equipage, and which is studied with so much care to give one its mark.

Ah ! no, the picture is simple — the expedition has but two points which are noteworthy. It is against the taste, and against the custom of society — those insidious tyrants that rule the world, and woo their subjects most coaxingly with their witchery and lead them on by rewards ; but if one

8 LETTER I.

dare rebel against the law, their wand turns to lead, and the culprit cowers as if guilty of some higher offence — condemned by a worthier mandate.

I am dressed with the simplicity, I'm sure St. Paul himself would have pronounced " becoming a woman ; " with a countenance expressive of doubt and will combined, relative to my success ; with an eye a little restless but full of thought, and movements quick, like one just going to make a desperate plunge with the hope that it would tell on the future. But, dear Jane, the pith of the whole affair — of so much importance— which causes my present movement — on which depends expected knowledge — aye more, a fortune perchance I've dreamed, lies quietly in a box, once used as a shoe box, now strapped and carried in my hand. This I shall open, and present to the wondering people, books of various sizes and titles, of tastefully colored covers, for the sale of which I shall announce myself as agent.

I wonder if warriors ever tremble just before battle, and

desire, and almost will, to throw down their banner and

run ; for what else could they do ? How I wish some of the great ones had left their fears and weak points on record— a richer legacy to the world than all their bravery and triumphs ! We see the victory, but we want to know how far we are from it. We easily assume strength in anticipation of any coming event, and the heart desires its approach to test this strength. But when the crisis arrives to prove ourselves victorious, or feel the ignobleness of being a coward, we halt, turn, and wish that a retreat could be equally successful, equally glorious.

Already I anticipate your anxious inquiries and expressions of wonder. Why this expedition — why this battle against conservatism, which has kept us so long and so well ? What new era has dawned upon woman, that she need go forth into the broad world for knowledge more than her

LETTER I. 9

pleasure demands, or a fortune, save by a husband ? Terrible perversion, I know ! And, most of all, why I have left the honorable chair of the school-ma'am, to fill which my childhood dreamed the quintessence of all human perfectness, the crowning glory of mortals ? In maturer years, when I was actually laboring to obtain the post of honor, I was initiated into a deeper earnestness of the great responsibility about to devolve upon me ; yet none the less desirable, though the gilding looked less dazzling to older eyes. Oh ! how thrilling were the emotions I felt at the thought that I could develope the pure unsophisticated mind in living principles ; how I would develope all the good and strong that makes human nature glorious ! But I will leave the charms of school-teaching to the dreams of childhood, and for a class of theorists to harp upon as the root of reform ; and the practice of it to those who are born for it, whose natures, I must believe, are created of the rarest materials of humanity.

With a pardon for this digression, I would ask from the depth of my heart the blessings of all that is best and highest on the noble fraternity, as I most heartily bid it adieu. I enter my new field of labor to-day, although it is Friday, a day that the fates have frowned on, as fraught with disaster to the commencement of any new work. Wiser heads than mine have heeded the superstition with fear and reverence.

The childish goddess of April is here with her freaks and pranks — of storms, smiles, and tears. She wept all day yesterday as if she would never smile again ; and I should have doubted that she ever could, had I not witnessed the same in her of old. But oh ! this morning she laughs outright — so bright — too bright for mortals ! All the nymphs in glee, are in her train, she the brightest. Her tears are turned to gems ; only two hang in her clear blue eye, that tell she'll weep again — pleasing mark of her mortality ! Such a morn- 1*

10 LETTER I.

ing is always associated in my mind with the inimitable Rebecca at the well with her pitcher, giving water to the servant and camels of Isaac. I should think she would have greatly preferred meeting Isaac himself. But she modestly did not express the wish, and why should I ?

I feel that there is danger lest this beautiful morning may divert my mind from its purpose, and of my losing the gathered dignity for the coming ordeal. I almost wish to be an April nymph, to laugh and dance in glee, even if I must weep to-morrow — I can do nothing less now. But who cares or believes in sorrow when the heart is glad ? — Stupid must be the face, palsied the springs of life, of one who always keeps a remembrance of trouble to check merriment and the happy gushings of the heart. Oh ! they tell some good thought, or some accomplished good. Ministering angels are born in the sunshine of gladness, even if they are christened in sorrow. Joyous moments in our existence are God-sends, as well as the hues of sorrow that stain them.

But I will hie me off in this gladsome mood, and pray that its darker sister come not near me again until I have done the first work ; for a sunny face and a glad heart leaves its impression ; and who would not care to do so small a good, if nothing more ? I'm playing the theft on all my friends ; they are ignorant of my errand. I excuse my disrespect to filial right in keeping my mission, that I may avoid the preliminary part of a long dissertation on propriety, and what woman should do, or may do, because she has done : the utter failure of the project, and such a useless exposure to censure and ridicule — last of all, and most to be considered, such imprudence for one of Eve's daughters to travel unprotected and alone, as if all the world were wolves to catch and devour Little Miss Red Riding Hoods. I'll remember her fate !

I must make my debut as a pedestrian Book Pedler, and

Letter II. . 11

among my own townspeople, as my penniless purse forbids any escape to new faces ; and I may experience the truth of the scriptural declaration : " That a prophet is not without honor, save in his own country."

But adieu, dear Jane, and stoically prepare yourself for a heavy bombardment on your generous nature by medley missives, From your devoted friend.

LETTER II.

Ellisbukgh, K Y.

Bidding good-bye to my friends, and with as simple a reserve as I could command, yet seeming to look a little wise, I told them I was going to a small village about five miles distant, to visit a friend, truly a friend — one who has lent me eight dollars to aid in the commencement of my enterprise, for which I am really grateful. If I succeed, I will call him one of my benefactors, as well as the noble publishers who also gave me credit for books without security. How such confidence warms my heart ! How carefully will I prove myself worthy of the trust, and strengthen, or at least not help to lessen, their confidence in mankind. Kissing the three little cherubs as usual at my departure, almost with a bound I passed the gate, as each were wondering and asking what aunt Sarah had in that box.

My walk was pleasant, without any marked interruption. Occasionally some lean gossip of the neighborhood peered with a quizzing glance at my box, which seemed to hang so conspicuously at my side, as if some unusual importance was attached to the contents. Little did they think it contained such rich food for their souls to feast upon, and I an embryo Book Pedler.

On my way I saw small boys, earnest as larger ones,

12 LETTER II.

building mimic saw-mills, premature bridges, and sailing miniature boats on leaping, bounding brooks, that just had birth from the heavy shower, and would be gone almost as soon. How such " make believe " fosters the earnest — inlays the poetry and soul of future life. How it developes truly children, for what men call the real and useful things of life. It educates more than school-ma'ams do in months or ever, unless they take them into the practical school of nature. I wish mothers would restrain their children less, from the fear of a little exposure, or a dirty dress. More daring acts in boys would make greater men • and to-day, in my heroism, I think the same true of woman. We are all too much like the old lady, who forbade her dear Willie to go into the water until he had learned to swim.

I greatly enjoy the beauties of spring — my favorite season. The vegetable world is fast unfolding all its glories. The grass has velveted the fields, which in weeks will wave as plumes. The daffodil and violet blossom in the cottager's garden, and the delicate wild flower in its woody bed looks up and smiles ; they teach us restless mortals a lesson. The pe-wee sings out its silvery name ; the croaking crow seldom comes, since his mission to announce the approaching spring is fulfilled. The frogs have been heard the third time, and nature, ever true to her word, never plays the rogue and binds them again in their wintry ice-home. A few robins have come with motherly care to see if it is a fitting time for the emigration of their kind, and their clear notes make the fair boy clap his hands with delight, and almost breathless, run to tell, with larger eyes, in half-articulated words, " a robin has come ! "

The husbandman whistles his tune, if he has not since the last spring, as his bright new share turns the furrow, worked by a stalwart pair of oxen, that do well their master's bidding. How the farmer's heart must thank God for

LETTER II. 13

seed-time, and pray with trust for the harvest ! Who can be good if not the husbandman ? The proud strutting cock comes forth with his more quiet companion, crowing as long and as loud as if it were the next day after the creation of Adam. The lowing of cows is heard from the neighboring farms ; the bright shining milk-pans stand aslant against the shed walls to be sunned. The cheese-vat has its appointed place, ready for use, and bright anatto-colored cloth is spread on the bushes to dry, preparatory for the bindery of huge cheese. All tell of the thrift and patient industry of the housewife. Sheep were feeding on the hill-side, with their precious little lambs, that gambol and leap like sprites, in sudden graceful curves ; their woolly selves are nature's tufted work. The harmless tender things !

In my walk to the destined place, I thought how I should best introduce myself and business, and framed a speech, but would forget it at a second rehearsal, and again refrained it, till I had one which took in my business with proper dispatch and sufficient deference to my hearers. I studied an appearance by which I should sustain all my independence, and yet pleasingly solicit subscriptions for my books. Dear Jane, I thought so much about myself. What a prominent person self is ! I wish I could for a while forget my own identity ! I would like an honest confession from a few persons, telling how much they are occupied in thoughts of themselves. I rarely find those who will confess that the important personage I makes a large speck in their thoughts ; at least I think it is a prominence of unnatural growth. I wonder some famishing reformer has not seized on it as a means of rendering himself notorious. I remember once introducing the subject to a lady who was always talking of herself, but she was " never troubled thus," and with much advice told me that it proceeded from the very essence of selfishness. I do not know as this is true, but if the enig-

14 LETTER II.

ma is solved in my day, I'll mark well the nature of the solution, and publish it for the benefit of those who are thus afflicted. But pardon this digression, and give me your opinion.

When I reached the village I closely viewed each dwelling, that I might enter where I was quite sure the inmates would take books ; but all looked forbidding ; and passing on, I hoped that the next would promise more success, until I found 'twas the play of the coward, and rushed into the shoe-shop of a man that I knew, who was more marked for his Yankee cleverness than any other characteristic. I commenced telling my errand, and though not remembering what I said, I judge it was far from the studied speech I had framed for the occasion. I not only forgot to open my box in time to give the best effect, but forgot to open it at all. I conclude from the expression of the good man, that seeing the picture of the shoe on my box, he thought I had shoes to sell, and quickly replied that he did not need any. I left the shop with crimson cheeks, and after collecting my senses a little, called on a lady, only giving the dear creature an affection like my own, of not knowing what she was about. As I entered, a large dog started up, and came growling and driving most furiously toward the young Book Pedler ; but the mistress called off Pontiff, and thus saved a queen, though incognito — the audacity of the creature ! Getting into the open air and alone, I arraigned myself before that impartial judge, common sense, that was to have been the marshal of the day, to find the cause of such a failure. Was I doing what was against my idea of right, of honor — doing what I would not defend before all the world ? Ah ! no : after a full investigation of the whole matter, I found it proceeded from an over sensitive regard for success. I reasoned, and wrought myself up to the highest state of will, and grew so strong, and was so fully satisfied as to the re-

LETTER II. 15

form, that I felt no fear of a like failure. But I was inclined to retire from the field until morning ; and needing no reason to second the retreat, I collected my scattered forces and turned to the house of my friend, where, feeling no restraint, I went off into a Petrea fit of over-acting in all I did and said. I talked unceasingly. The gas of feeling flew off as fire-balls, and the whole house would have been on fire had it contained combustible bodies. Some of the household seemed to doubt my sanity. The morning found me true to my resolution. After the preliminary customs were passed, and the good-bye and kind desires expressed by friends for my success, I went forth to conquer. I called first on a kindly gentleman of previous acquaintance, who looked over my books, and found one he very much desired. Feelings of accommodation took possession of me, I was so happy to furnish him with one. How good we can feel toward our neighbor when our interest prompts it ! I called on many other gentlemen with equal success. Several ladies took books of me, and some sent me to their husbands to see if they could subscribe, for they had thought of getting some nice gilt ones for their parlor table. When I found the husbands, they must see their dear wives, to know what was wanted ; for how could they see the need of books to decorate their parlor table ? Dull, tasteless beings ! I pray the dear wives will not have to abide by their want of taste, and I lose the sale of books from their stupidity.

I was directed to a very wealthy lady, " who always patronized the fine arts, was a great reader, and withal a strong - Woman's Rights woman.' " The last was thrown into a parenthesis by the relator of the lady's qualities, with a peculiar quirk of the eye, as if I was to meet my kind. Not knowing what grade of woman's rights the lady belonged to, I made no dissenting remarks to the narrator's surmise ; but went as directed, and found the lady, whose

16 LETTER II.

Amazonian form seemed to call for no physical rights, even if invoked to the battle-field. I found her one of those volcanic fires that had burst forth, and was pouring hot lava on the heads of our devoted men, with all her fury. Poor things, I tremble for them !

From the picture drawn of the wrongs and outrages done by them to our defenceless sex, I was painfully reminded of the buck's hunting and tearing the roe with the horns given him to protect the defenceless, hornless creature. What perversion of nature ! How did things come to such a pass ! The lady did not take the same view of woman's rights as I do, or she would have subscribed for some of my books, to have aided one at least to keep out of the jaws of such ravenous wolves.

But animated with my good luck — for I did not know that it depended on any greater power than luck — I wound my way home, dreaming of pleasant things to come, called occasionally at the country homes, and took subscriptions for several copies of " The American Ladies' Cook-Book. " The good housewives intuitively or thoughtfully knew the power of good living — one of the main-springs of domestic harmony — a palm of peace. Put the world on a low diet, no matter how much the reason approves of it, and you will have the people all by the ears. It is second to only one feature that greatly affects the happiness and good temper of mortal kind.

I called on a wealthy young bride, with much comfort and beauty around her, and, as she selected a richly-bound and high-priced book, my grateful heart went forth as an appropriate compliment to her charms, in this little stanza :

" See here the bride — how sweet, how prim — The loving bridegroom — look at him."

But I will not give a eulogy on brides now, however import

LETTER II.. 17

ant it might be to you ; I will merely assert for your ear, that they are young creatures essential to the happiness of all on this earthly sphere.

As I reached the environs of our settlement and passed the homes of my neighbors, unconscious that the secret of what my box contained had arrived before me, a leer, lank damsel, one of that class which is always marked for having a knowledge of others' affairs, opened the door of an humble abode, and gave me a most searching look of curiosity. Three little chubby boys, dirty and ragged, with black, funny, round eyes, and auburn hair, half-bleached to yellow, that hung straight from the crown of the head, so wilful that it could not be parted, sprang past the dame, and bounded to the road in spite of her resistance " to make them behave." With eyes growing wider at each look, one screamed at the top of his voice, " Marm, she aint a pedler ; she don't look like one." Another of keener perception of behavior, hunched the first spokesman with his elbow, and in a lower tone said, " Be still ; don't you see her box ? " I enjoyed the fun equally as much as the woman did her chagrin at such an exposure, only hoping that the innocent boys did not get whipped for the practical use of their education.

On arriving at home, I found the knowledge of my pedlership had not reached the inmates. Without any prepared speech, I made known the whole secret, causing, I presume, a similar disturbance in the family to that created by the tyro-philosopher Franklin, with his whistle. Some of the members laughed heartily at the farce, as they pleased to term it ; and others, looking gravely, with utmost severity, exclaimed, " What a figure for the world to laugh at ! " Then came the satire of the younger portion, that always show their power thus : " Why, you really must have looked like a sage-— -a pilgrim, with parchments of importance to the

18 'letter hi.

people." But I am impregnable, and have grown in my selfpossession, on the anticipation of the money that is to be mine.

Letter III

Ellisburgh, N. Y.

At the reception of these missives I send you, I see your form half-couching, sensitively shrink, and with both hands before your face, the palms turned outwardly, as we used to do so cowardly when we school-girls played snow-ball, and knew that the well-made ball was on its way. And, dear Jane, I could hope these scribblings will produce equally as happy an effect as when the white messenger came, and we laughing with such full heartiness if happening to catch it, sent forth exclamations of "bravo " in joyous screams from both parties. But don't raise too heavy a battery of defence ; it would be a loss of your strength, and a waste of my small cannonading. The balls sent will have little of the iron in them ; they will be the creation of substances gathered, like growing moss, from living bodies in its neighborhood. I shall, at least in our peaceful country towns, meet none of the " seven wonders under the sun," and which one sees, too, through a telescope formed purposely for their eyes. The glasses to mine limit my vision in seeing the wonderful. But if, through my artificial microscope which I intuitively use to view the elevations and depressions of the human character, I find phases of importance — which may be found here as elsewhere, as no bounds are prescribed, but where the human race is found, spring up indigenously — I may hope to interest you in these at least, as all are selfishly sympathetic in those of their kind.

But I am to travel on this terra fir ma — in this real land

LETTER III. 19

as a book pedler — if from no other cause than from want of magic — and especially the magic of money. I will tell you of nice earthly fairies that always wear good leather slippers, and never think of such a silly thing as losing one, to be found by some country swain, who would prove himself a frantic lover, because the wearer had a pretty little foot — of true honest-hearted girls, with full blooming cheeks, that take love into a proper consideration as a real earnest aifair, and lovers as a part of the domestic compact, filling the substantial relation of husband. These, with hopeful hearts, ply with untiring industry, the little spinning-wheel, and the yarn comes out in shreds, and is mended at each break by a fair plump finger, dipped in a gourd shell filled with water, that hangs on the standard, and carried and reattached to the flax head that hangs on the distaff. This slow progress of spinning a web for "a long piece," would utterly discourage less patient and hopeful hearts.

At the coming of summer, as one approaches the dwellings, brown linen cloth may be seen on the grass to bleach, and there is heard within a heavier buzzing noise — a wheel of larger circumference, attached to a head and spindle, moves, and, as one enters, a maiden is observed turning it ; — she is passing to and fro, and drawing fine yarn from a roll of white wool — a mystery in itself to the unpractised eye. A large " bunch " of the same kind is lying near by, to be converted into yarn. Slowly the wheel is turned as the thread is drawn out, and then quick buzz, buzz, and the yarn is wound up as if the spinner were blown by a gust of wind — the whole art of getting one's day's work done early. Charming practical beings, every sane mind admires you !

Observe their demure and quiet countenances, as they assiduously cut and sew together bright-colored calicoes, intermingled with white cloth of a variety of forms and size, to make bed-quilts. Very often these darling girls will place

20 LETTER III.

all they have finished out on a line "to air;" but I could never see the use of airing them so often, though I have been told that they are exhibited as " baits for beaux." Many of them have twenty-five or thirty in number, and are still making more. The dear creatures ! I should think they lived in the frigid zone. If you could see the stars, stripes, and zig-zag forms that compose the right side of the quilt, you would think they were to represent the " Thirteen States," if no more. Besides, they have calico roses, and leaves of a great variety, the half moon, the rising sun, and the setting of the same, and even men and women. I once saw Adam and Eve pictured on a quilt, before and after the fall — poor things ! — and Noah's ark, with his zoological multitude. I may have drawn too primitive a view of our leading young ladies in the country at the present time, in placing them at the wheel and loom — a part of the household labors, that are of late superseded by the application of steam and water power, which greatly expedites and lessens domestic labor, although many of our matrons declare the cloth does not wear half so long as " home-made," and one piece for the boys' trousers, therefore, must be made at home, and the stocking yarn spun.

In my journeyings through the country, I may hope to know how so large a space of time as was devoted to cloth-making is spent ; for I take a great interest in my countrywomen — don't you ? — and our men too.

I may find in my travels an Adonis. If I do — why — I will keep it to myself, as all sensible girls do — something that is never told to any one by judicious young ladies. I have a quiet hope of finding my better half; although a good old German woman, of whom I am a special favorite, declares, in tones like a prophetess — which quite makes me tremble — that I will never get married. The reason she gives is, that I have made no household preparations — no

LETTER III. 21

bed-quilts and table-linen, and now, with a woful shake of the head, that no nice young man will have a pedler — and a roguish-looking one too. But, dear Jane, when I get away from home, I'm sure I'll not tell that I haven't any bedquilts, and they will surmise that I am an heiress travelling in disguise, to find a true lover. I heartily wish woman's rights were here plenipotentiary, and then we would not have to stand back so coyly, blushing ourselves crimson, to be sought for, but we would declare our love ; and if we should get refused, it would be far better than suspense — horrid suspense ! Trembling tearful ones ! As it is, with the old lady's prophecy ringing in my ears, I feel some misgivings, although I have tried several times to induce her to change the cruel verdict, by telling her how early I was impressed and took at heart the duties of the wife and mother — how I read with such eagerness every volume and essay on the subject, fully believing all — how I devoured, with intense avidity, all of Dr. Alcott's works to the Young Wife and Mother, and his invaluable work — " The Mother at Home;" and I became a very capable adviser to those who had restive children. I read the writings of an author whose name has a place in the literary world. I took with mingled fear and reverence her views of the purpose, end, and aim of woman's existence — that she was not created for herself — that her wants and happiness were subordinate to another — that she should consider man's happiness prior to hers in all things. So deeply impressed was my young mind with her attractive style, that I took the matter into solemn consideration, and resolved henceforth to live to my purpose. I became so yielding and amiable for one day, that it called forth remarks of surprise from my brothers. They could not divine the cause, or what magic power had wrought the change ; but they were never afterwards surprised by my yielding to them because of their manhood, however much their supposed rights