A memoir of J. D. Paxton, D.D., late of Princeton, Indiana

Preface

If any apology is necessary for bringing before the public eye what was intended for private friends, the compiler would state that a request being made to Dr. Paxton, a few weeks before his death, that he would furnish an account of some of the principal events of his life, for the use of the church, led him, after declining by reason of inability, to say, “There is something of that kind that I wrote some time ago. I do not know that it will do any good. I wrote, thinking it might be satisfactory to my family to know more of my history. You will find the record among my papers, and must judge what is best to be done with it.” He was then beyond the influence of considerations which, at another period of his life, would have been potent. As his life had been given to the service of his Saviour, he was then willing to submit to others the record of that life, if in their judgment it was adapted to promote the interests of his church.

The perusal of the record produced the impression that it was a faithful account of the dealings of God with a human soul. The propriety of giving to the church a memoir of my husband, compiled from materials in my

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PREFACE.

possession, was taken under consideration. Consulting with an experienced friend, he decided that it was best to be done, and that I was the one to do it. I accordingly made known my intention of publishing a memoir, provided sufficient encouragement should be given in favorable responses to my announcement. The reception of the announcement has been such as to induce me to publish the work.

A few extracts from letters of young pastors will show their opinions of the “enterprise.” “I think the world has lost much by allowing such examples of piety and usefulness to be buried out of sight. I would rather have the life of Dr. Alexander than all the productions of his great mind that have come from the press. Giving a faithful memoir of Dr. P. to the public would be extending the influence of his whole life-work, which would be felt throughout the church. If your strength will permit, it will save you an immense amount of annoyance to perform the work yourself. You know more of his inner life than any other.”

“I was rejoiced,” writes a second, “to hear that you are about to publish Dr. P.’s memoir. I shall place it alongside of the lives of Alexander, Baker, and Rice, and value it more than all, for I was acquainted with him. ’ ’

“I know there is just such material in Dr. P.’s life as is now greatly needed in the church, not only among the people, but greatly needed among the ministry. It does seem to me that there is a lack of that consecration to the work of the Master among our young ministers that we

PREFACE.

Vll find among the old fathers that are so fast passing from us. If their memories are not preserved in our libraries, their example of zeal and sound doctrine will soon be lost to the church. Young men now are too easily discouraged ; they need the lessons of patient endurance of hardships, and prayerful strugglings with self and ambition, which can only be found in the lives of those that have passed away. The memoirs of a century ago are too much like a myth to have the desired effect ; we want the example of those of whom we have some certain knowledge of their having been living realities.”

The work is composed of an autobiography, a diary, kept for many years, and sketches of travel, blended in a continuous narrative; and whatever is added from personal recollection is but a sincere attempt at a faithful representation of facts.

The doctor, for the most part, tells his own story, and in his own way. That he did not claim perfection is manifest from the prominence he gave to his faults, that were better known to himself than to others, and are inserted to show the use he made of them, as also the little annoyances he sometimes met with from others. No unpleasant feelings will be awakened, for the actors in those scenes have all passed away. Their foot-marks show that they were of like passions with the present generation.

The writer had no wish to represent the subject of the memoir as dwelling in an upper region of sanctity, absorbed in acts of devotion, or performing acts of public worship, unconcerned about the low things of earth, but

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PREFACE.

has aimed to show how he brought a heavenly influence down from that upper region to hallow the common, every-day concerns of life. As life is made up chiefly of little things, some of these have been introduced as illustrations, with the conviction that, with a great number of persons, these will form the most interesting, as well as most instructive, part of the work.

In the belief that there are many that will recall the image of this good man with reverence and affection, and will look with favor on the attempt of their old friend to perpetuate his memory, the volume is submitted to the public.

To the youth whose parents would have read the work with interest I say, Thy father’s and thy mother’s friend forget not ! To the reading and religious public — I do not ask you to buy the book as a charity, but I do respectfully solicit your patronage and assistance in the circulation of it, as without it my object cannot well be accomplished.

M. W. P.

Princeton, Ind., May 28, 1869.

Chapter I

Parentage — Family Training — Tales of Frontier Life — Religious Experience — Business — Profession of Religion — New Views — Temptations — Efforts to obtain a Liberal Education — Preparation for the Ministry — Providences — Three Years at Washington College, Virginia — Notices of Teachers — Students — Facts about College — Ministers in the Vicinity — Anecdote — Hampden Sidney College, Virginia — Expectations — Duties in College — Trials — Views of the Ministerial Office — Decision — Tribute to the Memory of a Beloved Sister — Theological Students 13

Chapter II

Licensure — Missionary Tours — Experience as a Preacher — Horse lamed, and the Consequences — Journeys and Labors — Controversies in Tennessee — Difficulties in the way of Settlement — Reasons for going to Norfolk, Va. — War — Labors — Ordination — Success — Important Events — Mental Trials — General Assemblies of 1815 and 1818 — Remarks 49

Chapter III

More Labors in Virginia — Installation at Goochland, Va. — Marriage— Call to College Church — College and Seminary — Colonization— Emancipating Slaves — Consequences — Removal to New Jersey — Family Afflictions — Labors in Pennsylvania — Travel in New England — Residence in Kentucky — Installation at Danville — Departure for Europe 68

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X

CONTENTS.

Chapter IV

Voyage — Liverpool Docks — Manchester — Birmingham Cutlery — Warwick and Kenilworth Castles — Roads — Stage — London — Guy Fawkes’ Day — Lord Mayor’s Show Day — Church Reform — Caricature — Wine Cellars — Newspapers — Postage — Museum — Thames — Dover Cliffs — France — Diligence — Beggars — Lamps — Religion — Schools — Will of Louis XVI. — How to make Saints — A Widow’s Proposal — Carnival — Morgue — Attempt to Force a Union of Churches — Preachers — Religious Meeting — Episcopal School — Concert of Prayer — An Inquirer — Bost — Ordination of Missionaries — An Aged Disciple — Four Months’ Observations of Parisian Manners and Customs — Tombs of Two Dukes — Lyons — A. Monod

Chapter V

Geneva — Persecution — Centennial Celebration — Scenery — Chambery — Road to Turin — Chasm — Mount Cenis — Chapels of the Virgin — Library — Battle - field — Protestant Service — Genoa — View from the Bay — Leghorn — Falling Tower — Indulgences — Annoyances — Rome — Tivoli — Prussian Ambassador — Family Scene — Reading Rooms — Popery at Home — Bible at Rome — Successors of Peter — Lovely Valleys — Cultivated Mountains — Capua — A Smuggler — Pontine Marshes — Naples — Herculaneum— Vesuvius — Pompeii — Protestant Efforts — King’s Birthday— St. Janarius — St. Peter’s Chair — Delaware and Potomac — Voyage to Malta

Chapter VI

Malta — History — People — Saint Lucia’s Festival — Santa Agatha’s Veil-Legends — Festa del Bara — Baptism of a Dead Child — Many Languages — Opposition to the Bible — The Chaplain’s Ball — Evenings on the House-top — J. Wolff and Lady Georgiana — Society — Miraculous Cures — Casting out a Devil — Observatory— Monks — Proclamation of Don Carlos — Christmas — An Admission — Levee — Fasting

CONTENTS.

xi

Chapter VII

Voyage to Corfu — Education — Corinth — Athens — Funeral — King of Bavaria — Excitement among the Ladies of Syra — Scio — Missionary Meeting at Smyrna — Ephesus — Grave-yards — Worship at a Mosque — Hebrew Prayer-Book 239

Chapter VIII

Constantinople — Fiddling and Dancing in a Grave-yard — Objects of Interest — Sultan’s Kitchen — Chalcedon — Sultan attending Mosque — Ceremonies and Festivities of the Espousal and Marriage of Sultan’s Daughter — Circumcision of his Two Sons — Broosa — Pleasant Greeting — Mausoleum of Bajazet — Bath k la Turk — Nice — Fruit — Nicomedia — Turkish Post — Bosphorus — Whirling Dervishes — Rhodes — Cyprus. 264

Chapter I

Parentage — Family Training — Tales of Frontier Life — Religious Experience — Business — Profession of Religion — New Views — Temptations — Efforts to obtain a Liberal Education — Preparation for the Ministry — Providences — Three Years at Washington College, Virginia — Notices of Teachers — Students — Facts about College — Ministers in the Vicinity — Anecdote — Hampden Sidney College, Virginia — Expectations — Duties in College — Trials — Views of the Ministerial Office — Decision — Tribute to the Memory of a Beloved Sister — Theological Students.

NDER the impression that it may be agreeable to my family to have some written account of my life, which in several respects has been an eventful one, I have made the following record. It is drawn up from notes made from time to time, from about the period I sought an education with a view to the ministry, together with my recollections of the past events.

I was born September 28, 1784. My father’s plantation lay on the south side of James River, near its junction with the North, in what was called The Forks, Rockbridge County, Virginia. My father, John Paxton, was the oldest son of Thomas Paxton, who owned the boat-yard at the junction of Buffalo Creek with the North River. My mother was Sarah Walker, oldest daughter of Joseph

Walker, who lived on Carr’s Creek, a little north of where Lexington now stands, the county-seat of Rockbridge County, Virginia. Mr. Walker was born in Ireland, July, 1722. He was brought to America when a youth, and married, March, 1749, Nancy McLung, in Augusta County, Virginia. He was a ruling elder in the Monmouth Church, which embraced what afterward formed the churches of Lexington, Monmouth, Oxford, and others. Later in life he moved, as did most of his family, to Kentucky, and finished his days near Cherry Spring, Kentucky.

My grandfather Thomas and his brother William were ruling elders in the Presbyterian Falling Spring Church, Rockbridge County, Virginia, before the time of the American Revolution. After the death of my grandfather, my father succeeded him as ruling elder in the same congregation, which office he filled above fifty years. At his death, his second son Joseph (of the Forks James River) was made an elder in his place ; and I have lately learned that since my brother Joseph’s death, his oldest son, Thomas P. Paxton (of the Forks), has been made an elder in his place. Thus four elders of the same family in the same congregation have followed each other, the son succeeding the father, filling the space of nearly one hundred years.

In the early times of my father and mother, Augusta County, from which Rockbridge was afterward set off, was a frontier county, and much exposed to inroads from the Indians. The settlements on Carr’s Creek were several times cut off while my mother was young. The families in that region, in those times of danger, lived in forts. The men would go out by day and attend to their farms, and return to the fort at night. Her father sometimes took her with him to the farm to cook for him. She said she would hurry and wash the dishes, put things in order, and then go to the

J. D. PAXTON, D.D.

*5 field where her father was at work, being afraid to remain in the house alone. More than once, when a part of the settlers on the creek were attacked by the Indians, the family did not leave the house until they saw the smoke of the burning houses at the upper part of the creek. Many lives were lost by these Indian massacres. In attending worship on the Sabbath, the men often went armed, thus prepared to defend themselves and families. Many moving tale's of frontier adventure have passed away unrecorded with the generation in which they happened. They were often referred to in conversation. I will record one as related by my mother.

Her father was one day plowing in his field ; no one was with him, or at the house. A boy came running to him, so completely out of breath that he could do no more than stammer out “ Indian !” and point to the creek. That was enough to designate the cause. Mr. Walker did not take time to loose the gears, but with his knife cut the fastenings and threw them off, lifted the boy on one of the horses, mounted the other, and made for the fort, which they reached in safety. The boy stated that he was at a plantation on the other side of the creek, and had climbed up into an apple-tree to get some apples. That while he was in the tree an Indian came under it, picked up an apple or two, but happened not to look up. His attention seemed directed across the creek, where he could hear Mr. W. speaking to his horses. The Indian started down to the creek, and the boy supposed his object was to cross and kill Mr. W. As soon as the Indian had gone so far that the boy could venture, he came down from the tree ; but as the Indian had taken the direct way, he had no alternative but to take a circuitous route and cross above where the Indian was, and make up in speed what he lost in distance. In doing this, he was completely exhausted when he reached i6

Mr. W. It was nobly and successfully done, and in no other way, probably, could he have saved Mr. W.’s life.

Both my parents were, I believe, truly pious, and that from early life. I have been told by old men who knew him, that from his boyhood my father was a praying person ; and one of the earliest things I can remember is that of going with my mother when she retired for prayer. She would make me, and any other of the children who might be with her, kneel down by her side while she prayed. Though I may not have had adequate conceptions of the import of the duty, the importance which mother attached to it made an impression on my mind. Family worship was a duty seldom, if ever, omitted. When my father was absent, it was conducted by my mother. This also made its impression on me. I was taught the Lord’s prayer and some others, and was told that I ought to pray morning and evening, and did, with some degree of regularity, perform that duty. While growing up I was made to learn the Catechism and read the Word of God.

My parents were strict observers of the Sabbath and constant at church, unless justifiable circumstances prevented. We lived seven miles from Falling Spring Church and nine from High Bridge,* between which the Rev. S. Houston divided his time. We had the James River to cross, often too deep to ford, in going to both places, and Sally’s Mountain to pass over in reaching Falling Spring. This last church we always attended, and in good weather some of the family were found at High Bridge. It took most of the day to go, attend the service, and return. In the summer there were usually two sermons, with an interval of half an hour ; in the winter but one service.

* Two miles from Natural Bridge, Cedar Creek.

As the family was large — five sons and four daughters — and had not horses for all to ride, I, with some of my brothers, often walked to church. At times I felt some reluctance, but almost always while there attending worship I was glad I had come, and thought I would not again feel disinclined, and for several days was more attentive to the duty of prayer. This with me, however, seemed almost the whole of religion.

Our situation south of the river cut us off a good deal from a free intercourse with the neighborhood and lessened our school advantages, but in other respects ^as rather favorable, limiting that abundant intercourse with other youth which is often unfavorable to morals. As I grew up I began more and more to desire to take part in those pleasures and amusements indulged in by the young with whom I at times associated ; felt sometimes that the restraints laid on me by my parents were not wholly agreeable, and almost envied those youth whose parents allowed them to follow their own pleasure.

My father, having no property but his farm and fixtures, could do little more than support his family, and had little prospect of giving his children much of an outfit to begin the world with. It was thought best that most of his sons should engage in business or learn some trade, as a means of providing for themselves. My oldest brother and my youngest two, with myself, engaged in business, while my second brother remained on the farm and gradually assumed the charge of the family and became possessor of the property. My sisters all married and became the mothers of families, and have descendants to the third and fourth generation. I continued with my father and worked on the farm until I was in my nineteenth year.

In the spring of 1802 a revival of religion took place in Bedford County. A large party, mostly of young people, went from Rockbridge to attend a sacramental meeting. Dr. Baxter and Rev. Blane accompanied them. Brother Joseph and two of my sisters were of the party. Almost the whole of this company were deeply impressed. On their return a considerable revival was manifest in Rockbridge, and a number made profession of religion, — among them one of my brothers and three of my sisters. I considered this a favorable time to engage in religion, and, as I thought, did so. I reflected more on the matter, prayed more, attended preaching and the prayer meetings' with more interes^.nd even pleasure.

With the consent of my parents, I left home about this time, to reside in Liberty, Bedford County, with Mr. M., remaining with him three years, and mastering the business which he followed. The revival was at its height at that place, and a glorious work of God it was. The whole community were more or less affected, and a great number added to the church. I felt a singular delight in the matter, and gave close attention to the means of grace. Hearing persons relate their religious experience, and comparing my own exercises with theirs, I at length concluded that my feelings amounted to a religious experience. I had convictions, fears, sorrows, and joys ; at times my heart felt hard and cold and my affections wandering ; at others my heart would melt, my tears flow, and my feelings were of a pleasing and joyful kind. I recollect one night I had such joyful feelings that I felt a wish that I might die before morning. I knew almost nothing of the wickedness of my heart, but thought those imperfections which I discovered in myself constituted that depravity of which I heard so much said in preaching and in the conversation of God’s people. When I heard any temper described as belonging to religion, I tried to excite it in myself and often thought that I succeeded.

y. D. PAXTON i D.D.

*9

I thought it my duty to make a public profession of religion, but felt a kind of superstitious dread of it. In trying to prepare for it I spent much time in reading, prayer, and self-examination. I was much more impressed with the sin of neglecting to confess Christ and commemorate his death, than with the privilege of so doing. I had very incorrect notions of the nature and design of the ordinance, and a strange, superstitious idea of the benefit to be derived from it. I was sadly blind to the spirituality of the gospel and the disorders of my own heart.

I connected myself with Peaks Church in the spring of 1803. At the sacramental table, was unusually dull and hard-hearted, and left in an uncomfortable frame of mind. Good feelings were what I desired ; not possessing these I was very unhappy, feared I had partaken unworthily, and was greatly depressed. After spending the evening in retirement and having a return of softer and more comfortable feelings, I again hoped that all was well.

A few months after this, the sacrament was to be administered at Pisgah and I designed to attend. As the time drew near I devoted more time to preparation, hoping that I might have more enjoyment in the ordinance than I had before. It was Tuesday or Wednesday morning previous to the Sabbath, and while engaged in private prayer, that I saw with a convincing clearness that I was altogether mistaken as to my hope of an interest in Christ. It seemed as plain as light, that I had not really repented, did not truly believe in Christ, had no love to God and divine things. These new views threw me into the most fearful perplexity and alarm. At times they would fade away, leaving me in a darkness of mind, as to my situation, which might well be compared to the case of a person who, in a dark night, walks with a lamp which suddenly goes out. I could not, at pleasure, recall those views nor continue them. The strong impression of what they had discovered to me was left and filled me with fears, I may almost say with terrors. From time to time these new views, with more or less clearness, returned, and were followed, after a longer or shorter time, with more or less of this distressing darkness. This continued for weeks and months.

I did not attend the sacramental meeting, but spent the Sabbath alone, and most of it in prayer. For weeks and months I was hardly able to pursue my usual avocations. My business allowed me some leisure, and my custom was, as soon as I could finish, which was about the middle of the afternoon, to withdraw, with my Bible or some religious book, to a grove in the vicinity, and spend the remainder of the day, and sometimes part of the night, in religious exercises. I was occasionally favored with calm moments ; and at times they came to my relief when under such fearful paroxysms of alarms, fears and distress, that I must now consider them as sent in mercy to keep me from despair or self- ruin.

As I had never made myself acquainted with the evidences of Christianity, I was presently involved in doubt on the whole matter. So harassed was I with doubts that I well remember that I most earnestly desired to see a Jew, hoping that the sight might help to confirm my belief in the truth of the Bible.

From the singular manner in which my mind was exercised on this matter, I must now believe it was a violent temptation, as occasionally almost everything appeared to be involved in uncertainty. As a general thing, I felt that I ought to be thankful to God that He had caused me to see the mistake into which I had fallen, and much of a spirit of prayer that He would lead me to a saving knowledge of the truth. I can well recollect that often, when assailed with doubts as to the truth of almost everything

J. D. PAXTON, D.D.

connected with religion, the steady, consistent piety of my mother has served as a support — as something real, and I have laid hold of that for support, feeling confident that my mother’s religion was sincere and there must be truth in it.

I was often distressed with the most awful and blasphemous thoughts. They would follow me to all places, and in all employments, and most grievously disturb me in prayer and in all the duties of religion. I found it impossible to banish them from my mind. They almost drove me to despair ; for I did not then imagine there was any agency of Satan in it, as I now believe there was. It seemed to me that a fountain of wickedness had been opened in my heart, of which, till then, I had no conception.

Sometimes there was a disposition to murmur that God had left me to such sorrows. I envied God’s people who enjoyed his favor. Hard thoughts would arise against Him who had suffered me thus to deceive myself. I knew such thoughts were sinful, but could not get clear of them ; they haunted me.

I looked for something great and almost miraculous; something that would remove all doubts and darkness and evil at once; but what it was, or how it was to come, I knew not. I was very diligent in the use of the means of grace; read, fasted, and prayed, and attended the preaching of the gospel ; going sometimes ten, fifteen, or twenty miles to protracted meetings, in hope of finding relief.

After such special efforts, when no change took place, and the eager effort seemed to leave me more hard and unfeeling, a spirit of murmuring and rebellion would take possession of me ; thoughts would arise that it was vain to seek God ; that my case was a lost one ; that grace would not be granted ; and that perdition would be my portion. While these thoughts and feelings held possession of my mind and baffled all efforts to banish them, I passed some of the most unhappy moments of my life. Those very feelings of rebellion, those murmurings, made me tremble with apprehension lest God would let loose his hand against me. I sometimes think that while in this rebellious frame of mind, I felt in kind , if not in degree, the torments of the damned.

At other times my heart would melt, a feeling of resignation would pervade my mind, my tears would flow, I would feel that I was in the hands of God, and that it was right that He should do what appeared best in his sight. A faint hope would spring up that, as God had shown me my error, He possibly might save me. Such moments were as cordials to my soul, — merciful alleviations of a distress almost insupportable ; and from the way and time in which they came, I must believe they are to be ascribed to the good Spirit of God, who was even then guiding me, though I knew it not.

For some time after I had discovered my error, I was much distressed with the fear that, as the revival was now past, people becoming careless, and some beginning to fall away, I should not be able to obtain a hope in Christ. I had passed through the revival without receiving the blessing, and feared it could not then be obtained. There was less preaching, the prayer meetings nearly given up, — and what was to become of me !

Another thought gave me much trouble. Observing that in most families while some professed to have religion others did not, — that it was only occasionally that all the members professed a hope in Christ, and as most of my father’s family had professed a hope, I feared that I was the one who was never to obtain it, but be lost forever. The fact that I had been left to deceive myself and make a false profession was strong proof that this must be the case, y. D. PAXTON, D.D.

and almost drove me to despair. I avoided all society as much as possible, even that of religious persons with whom I had been intimate. Thinking they must suppose me one of the vilest wretches on earth, for having made profession of religion when I had none, I wished to avoid their sight.

The degree of my distress, and my irregularity as to food and sleep, so wasted my flesh and spirits that my friends became apprehensive that the consequences might be fatal. Several conversed with me and thought I had religion, and tried to comfort me with this hope, but being fully satisfied that I had been deceived in making a profession while my heart was not renewed, such conversations, designed to prove that I was only in a state of darkness and temptation, served to make me more averse to talk on the matter. I feared they might lead me to rest on something short of true holiness, and thus cause my ruin. I felt, however, the force of the reasons adduced by the Rev. Houston, why I should take more care of my bodily health, be more regular as to food and sleep. I followed his advice and was benefited by it.