Letters to persons who are engaged in domestic service

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WHO ARE ENGAGED IN

DOMESTIC SERVICE

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LETTER r. PAGE

The station of domestics important, respectable, and advantageous to themselves. A story to illustrate the state of things in this country . 9

LETTER IL

Letter III

Difficulties experienced by the shipwrecked company, and how these were remedied.

In the following letter I shall tell you of some trouble that these shipwrecked persons met, in following out their new plan of life.

After they had spent several months in doing up the work which past neglect had made needful, and after the harvest was gathered in, the good minister found many evils coming upon them, for want of enough work to keep them all busy. Idleness is the parent of a thousand evils and vices, and therefore something he saw must be devised, in order to keep all hands employed.

The company came together to talk over this matter. At this meeting it was stated that their clothing and furniture w^re going to destruction even with careful use, and that as more must be provided soon, this might afford employmerit to idle hands. It was then urged by some of the company that they should take what wool they could get from their sheep, and what flax they could raise^ and make a kind of coarse and strong cloth called linsey woolsey^ and then all might dress alike, and thus there would be no more trouble about some having better clothes than others. But it soon was shown that this would not remedy the difficulty about employment. For such coarse and strong clothing would last so long, that all those who now had employment in making and mending and refitting and in doing fine sewing, would be thrown out of employ.

At length it was agreed that an embassy should be sent to the king, to request him to let the company trade with at least one store on their borders, where they might exchange the products of their lands for clothing and furniture. This request was granted, on this condition, that each individual might bring all he raised himself, and get whatever he wanted, but that no one should take any thing that he did not pay for with the fruits of his own labour.

After this arrangement was made, a great change took place in the palace. Those who were diligent, active and bright, discovered various w^ays of raising large crops, or of making ingenious articles, which they exchanged at the store for such furniture and clothing as they liked. But those who w^ere dull, or lazy, or vicious, did not succeed in raising the means to buy new things, and were obliged to put up with old or very cheap ones. Sometimes those who lived in the finest rooms would agree to give up those rooms to those who w^ere most successful, in order to share in some of their profits. And thus it came about that many w^ho had the plainest rooms, and clothing, and furniture, by their industry and enterprise, finally came to possess the finest rooms and handsomest clothing and furniture. And so on the other hand, some of those wlio at first by lot had gained the best of every thing, were driven by their ignorance or indolence, to take the poorest of every thing.

These changes at first produced great discontent. But the good minister took unwearied pains to convince the discontented ones, that though some evils came from having some persons gain so much superior advantages, yet on the whole, it was far better than to have them hold property in common, and all fare alike. For, as he showed them, a great part of mankind are disposed to be careless and indolent, and would never exert themselves, unless some great advantage was to be gained by care and industry. For this reason, it is a great advantage to every body to have persons around them, who own beautiful, or convenient things that can be gained by themselves only by intelligence and industry. For thus every one will be stimulated to improve his mind, and employ his time diligently.

On the contrary, if every body dressed and ate and fared just alike, whether they were industrious or not, the stimulus to exertion would be taken away, and many would become lazy gnorant and vicious. These teachings of the minister were effectual in most cases, so as to preserve harmony and peace.

But another difficulty arose, that caused still more trouble. The company was so large, that they could not all sit together in one parlour, nor all eat together at one table ; and very often the question came up, as to who should associate together. The minister taught them that this was a point where every man had a right to consult his own taste and feelings. No person had a right to go and visit another person's room when he was not wanted, and every one might decide for himself w^hat company he would have visit him, and who he would not have as a friend or companion. By following this rule, it came about that persons w^hose tastes, pursuits, and characters w^ere most alike, became most interested in each other, and thus they found it pleasantest to eat together and to sit in the same parlour. Thus those who, either by lot, or by their intelligence and industry, gained the finest clothes and furniture, and had similar employments and habits, formed one circle by themselves. In like manner those who worked together in the fields became best acquainted, and they formed another circle. And thus, too, those who w^orked in the kitchen became best acquainted and associated together.

But the good minister found many hard feelings coming up from this state of things. For those who had the most talents, and the finest clothing and furniture, began to take airs of superiority, and to treat the others with discourtesy and disrespect, while those who had less advantages grew envious, jealous and discontented. It w^as a very difficult matter to rectify the wrong state of feeling on both sides. Though the minister taught those who had the most advantages, that they should set an example, to all the rest, of gentleness, humility and courtesy, he could not prevent some of them from appearing haughty and proud, nor induce them to treat all persons with respect and courtesy, whatever were their employment or appearance.

And it was just as difficult to make those who were less fortunate, feel kindly towards those who were better off than themselves. They all insisted that none should visit them in their rooms, or eat with their circle, unless their company was wanted, but when other people used the same privilege and excluded them they felt grieved and offended. They were so unreasonable as to insist that nobody should treat them as they were determined to treat others. And though the minister laboured more to make them feel and act reasonably about this than for any thing else, he often sighed over his poor success.

LETTER IV, The manner in which this story illustrates the state of

things in this country.

My Friends :

I WILL now point out some respects in which you will see that the people of this nation are situated very much like the shipwrecked travellers. In the first place then, we have received from God, that great and benevolent King over all, a noble country, filled with an abundance of all kinds of treasures. And the two conditions on which we enjoy it are, first, that we shall take care of ourselves, and do our own work, and, secondly, that we shall all be " free and equal," and all " equally entitled to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness," in any way that ea^h one may think best for himself.

We also are bound by the same grand rule that was adopted by the shipwrecked company^ that, every one shall do that which will secure the most enjoyment to the whole company, and not that which each one likes best. It is according to this rule that all our laws are made, which restrain men from seeking their own pleasure by sacrificing the public good. And our laws are made by men appointed by the people for the purpose, and executed by judges and officers appointed by the people, from among themselves. In this also we resemble the company in the story.

The question as to who shall work, and what kind of work each one shall do, and who shall have the best rooms and furniture and clothes, is also settled just as it was in the story.

For by common agreement w^omen are appointed to work in the house, and men to work out doors.

Then it is God decides what our lot shall be when we are born into the world. God determines who shall be born of poor parents and who of rich, and this decides what kind of work each one shall do, and what kind of accommodations and furniture each shall possess. It was thus in the story. By casting lots, the company gave to God the business of deciding

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what stations and employments each should take, and this determined what clothes and accommodations each should take. But more depends on our intelligence, industry, and virtue, than on the particular lot in which we are born, so that the people in this country are in exactly the situation of the shipwrecked company after they began to trade at the store. Though some few keep the place they got by the lot of birth, almost every thing depends on intelhgence, skill, industry and virtue. In this country, any man who is well educated, active, skillful and industrious can become comparatively rich. Of course, in this land, men have more inducements to become well educated^, virtuous, and industrious than the people of any other nation on earth.

In like manner, each kind of work has overseers appointed to direct others. Who these overseers shall be, in most cases, also, is decided on the same plan as in the story. Those who know the most^ generally, become overseers. In cases where persons hire laborers to work on farms, or in their families, then the master of the house, or the farm, is the overseer, and directs those he hires, because they agree, for a reward, to do as he directs. But in almost all trades and professions, it is those who know the most, who rise to stations where they are overseers to others.

This is a great benefit to all the coramunity, because it is an encouragement to all persons to improve their minds, and to be industrious in acquiring skill and knowledge.

In this country too, we have men who spend all their time in studying about diseases and in attending to the sick, and others who educate the young, and others who discharge the duties performed by the good minister in the story.

And we find among us too, some people who think that it would be much better for us if every body earned money for the common stock, instead of laying it out for themselves, so that nobody should have any handsomer rooms, or furniture, or clothing than all the others have. Such persons think it would be w^ise to give up carpets, sofas, china, glass and all ornaments, and to have every body live very plainly, and all fare just alike.

But the great body of the people know better than this. They see that if all the manufactories of carpets, sofas, glass, china, silks, muslins and ornaments were stopped, that all the persons now employed in making, and in trading in these articles, would be thrown out of employ, and having nothing to do, would become lazy and wicked.

They, therefore, conclude that it is best that all kinds of rich and beautiful things should be made, in order to keep one set of persons busy in making them, and another set busy in earning money to buy them. This view of the subject should keep persons from complaining that so many needless and extravagant things are made and sold. It is true that many are thus tempted to buy more than is wise or right, yet on the whole, great good results to the community. For if nobody bought any thing but what was barely necessary to life and comfort, half the world would become lazy beggars, for want of something to do. In this country, also, we find the same trouble that the good minister in the story saw among his people. For everywhere we find persons associating together in different classes, that refuse to admit other classes to join thera. Thus, domestics form one class, farmers another, mechanics another, merchants another, and literary persons another. Now, in some parts of the country, all these classes mingle together, without any distinctions of class. But this is not generally the case. For, in most places, we find various circles who consider themselves as above or below others, in certain respects, and who are very apt to feel wrong towards each other on this account. Thus domestics in a family will often feel very much above persons who are mulattos, and refuse to eat or associate with them, and yet they think it very hard if mechanics' wives and daughters have the same sort of feelings towards them. In like manner, mechanics' daughters and sempstresses refuse to eat or to associate with domestics^ and yet they think it very wrong if merchants' or lawyers' daughters refuse to associate with them. And even in those circles who call themselves the very first, the same feeling is often to be met. I have been in places where there was a rich and fashionable set, that felt above every other class, and yet there was another class who called themselves literary^ who felt quite as much above the fashionable set, whom they called the vulgar rich, and whom they would not associate with, even if urged to do so.

Now it cannot be denied that there often is something wrong on both sides in these cases. For all should be allowed to choose who shall associate with them, and who shall not, and none should feel wronged or injured, because others do not wish to have them come into their circle. Every one should grant to others the same right as he claims for himself. No one has a right to force his company on us, when we do not wish it, and we have no right to claim that others shall admit us into their circle, unless they wish it.

But the great mischief is, that those who feel above another set, are very apt to treat those they fancy to be below them, with discourtesy or contempt, while those who feel below others, are apt to indulge in suspicious, envious, or revengeful feelings.

How has it been with you who read this ?

Are there not persons whom you refuse to as-

5* sociate with, and would you not be offended if they were set to eat at the same table with you ? And yet have you not felt angry when others have used the same right in regard to you ? Is not this a place where you very much need the golden rule, " Do unto others as ye <would that others should do unto you ?"

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Letter V

Reasons for regarding the station of a domestic as honourable and respectable.

The preceding letters were designed to give you some general views of the state of things in this country, and of the station which you are called to occupy. I will now point out reasons for regarding your station and employment as honourable and respectable.

It is sometimes the case that persons will speak of the place of a domestic as the humblest and least desirable of any ; and some young girls will go into shops and manufactories, and work much longer, and for lower w^ages, because they fancy that it is more respectable than the place of a domestic. And not unfrequently " shop girls" and '' factory girls" will show much pride and folly, in shunning the society of domestics, and in treating them with disrespect and contempt, as if they were very much below themselves. All these things are owing to a w^ant of correct notions as to the real usefulness and respectability of this important station in life. And I will now point out the reasons for considering your situation as far more honourable, desirable, and useful than that of a sempstress, a shop girl, or a factory girl ; and even as superior in respectability to that of many persons who consider themselves as belonging to the " very first society.''

There are two things that make a station honourable ; one is ihe power to do good, and the other is using this power in the right manner.

Why is the office of a king or queen the most honourable of any in the nation ? Because it secures the most power to confer benefits and enjoyment on others ? Why is the station of a president, a governor, or a judge so honourable? Because they have great power given them to use for the happiness of others. Why is the oflSce of a minister of the gospel honourable ? Because his education, character and office give him great powers to do good. Why are rich men considered more honourable than poor ?

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Because their money gives them power to increase the happiness of others. They can give employment to the poor, can give custom to the shopkeepers and tradesmen, can bestow money on charitable objects, can secure a superior education, and many other agreeable things that make it pleasant to others to associate with them. Why are persons of talent and learning honourable ? Because their talents and knowledge give them power in various ways to promote their ow^n interest and to do good to others.

The mere possession, then, of a power to do good, is what makes one station more honourable than another. But another thing that makes a station honourable, is the actual using of this power in doing good.

If kings and queens are selfish and wacked, and use their power to oppress their people, they are never as much honoured as when they use it to do good.

If presidents, governors, and judges use their power to do evil, they are not honoured like those who use it to do good. If a minister of the gospel uses his influence to do harm rather than good, he is more despised than he is honoured. If rich people spend their wealth in selfish indulgences, or in harmful vices, they are not honoured as they would be, if they spent it for useful and benevolent purposes. If persons who have talents and learning, spend their time and influence to do evil, they are not honoured or respected as they w^ould be, if they employed them to do good.

Now I think you clearly see, that the two things which make a station honourable are, the power to do good, and the use of this power in a proper manner. If, then, I can show that domestics have great power to do good given them, and that they really use this power in doing good, I shall prove that the station of a domestic is an honourable and respectable one. And if I can show that domestics have more power, and actually do more good, than many who think themselves above them, I shall prove, too, that they have the more honourable and respectable station. I will therefore point out the power of doing good which is given to domestics. In the first place, then, they do more than any other class of persons to sustain that most important institution of God, thefaraily state. How much benefit and comfort mankind receive through this institution, few of us can realize. To help you to do so, just imagine the state of things in this country, if all the homes in the land were broken up, and all classes of persons herded together in common, like flocks of animals.

In this case the father and husband would have no quiet home to go to for comfort, and the mother would have no house of her own where she could train her children. Every child, too, would be turned out into the community to take care of itself, w^ith no parents to w^atch over it by day and night, no brothers and sisters to sleep and play with, no regular meal to call all the children together around their kind parents.

In a cold and selfish world, w^ithout guardians, without a home, without parental restraint and tenderness, each young child w^ould go into the common herd, to grow up selfish, unhappy, unloving and unloved.

Instead of this, God ordains that parents shall have a home of their own, where they can have their children to themselves, to train them J up in love and peace and plenty. And one main support of this blessed institution of family and home is, those domestics who are hired to do the chief labours of the family. Just take away from this country all the cooks, chambermaids, waiters, washers, and house cleaners, and what would be the result ? The fathers could not leave their business to do the family work, the mothers would not have strength to do it, and the family state would be broken up. And thus unnumbered miseries and crime would come in floods upon the land. The position and the work of a domestic, then, are among the most useful, the most important and the most honourable. They have a powder given them to do good and to save from evil, not surpassed by that of any other class in the community. Let any one select the class of persons that could be dispensed with last of all^ and it would be found that lawyers, merchants, doctors, and ministers w^ould all be given up, before every family would agree to give up all aid from cooks, washers, nurses and every kind of hired service in the family.

But, in addition to the power thus given to domestics in sustaining the family state, they have another most important position of usefulness. This relates to the power they exercise in forming the characters of young children. The period of life from infancy to twelve years old, is the time in which the foundations of future character are laid. During this time, children are in the society of domestics almost as much as they are with their parents, and in many cases, they talk with those hired to take care of them much more than they do with their parents. Children are creatures of imitation and sympathy, and they soon learn to think, and feel and act like those around them. Of course domestics are constantly exerting a powerful influence in forming the opinions, tastes, habits, and character of children, more so, probably, than any other class in the community. To estimate this power properly, we must remember that the happiness of children depends almost entirely on the character they form. If they learn to control their appetites, to be honest, truthful, benevolent, and industrious, they will be useful and happy in future life. If they do not learn to control their appetites, if they learn to be deceitful, dishonest, selfish and irritable, they certainly will be unhappy and unprosperous. And our whole nation is to be made up of children, whose happiness and prosperity w^ill depend, to a great degree, on the influences exerted over them by domestics in early life. And the next generation is to depend, for happiness and prosperity, on the manner in which the present generation is trained. And the next after that, depends in like manner, on the one before it, so that the influence which domestics exert on one generation of children is to go down to generation after generation, for hundreds of years.

And yet, this is not half of the mighty power, which is given to domestics to use, either for good or for evil. All these children, who from generation to generation are thus influenced in character, by domestics who take care of them, are to live forever^ and their happiness for endless ages, is to depend on the character which they form in this life ! Oh eternity ! eternity ! who can estimate the power of those who are doing so much, in forming the character of beings who can never ^ never die !

Another particular in which domestics have great power is, the influence they exert in making home pleasant to husbands and sons. In a family where most of the work is done regularly and well, by domestics, the mother has time to take good care of her children, and her mind is cheerful and free from excessive cares. In this case, the husband and sons find a comfortable and pleasant home, and are not tempted to resort to dangerous amusements abroad. But when every thing is going wrong in the kitchen and nursery, the wife and mother is perplexed and harassed, and often is low-spirited or irritable. The father and sons, when they come home, find the house in disorder, their food ill cooked and served, their linen out of order, their beds uncomfortable, the housekeeper gloomy,, the children unregulated, and every thing seems to drive them off to look for a more cheerful and comfortable resort. Many and many a husband and son has thus been driven to temptations and snares, that have drawn them and their famihes to misery and ruin.

Another power for doing good given to domestics is, their opportunities for comforting and reheving the sick. Sickness always makes a great deal of work, and w^ere it not for domestics, the sick would suffer greatly for want of nursing and many comforts. No persons owe more to domestics than those who, by sickness, are deprived of all power to take care of thexselves. I might point out other particulars in which domestics have it in their power to do great good, but surely enough has been presented to show, that if great power to do good is what entitles persons to be called honourable, then domestics have a pre-eminent claim.

But it has been shown, that it is not only the power to do good, but the actual use of this power that entitles a person to honour and respect. Here, also, domestics will be found to have a claim equal to that of any other class of persons. It will be found, that there are individuals in every class of society, who do not use their power well. There are bad kings and

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bad governors, bad rich men and bad learned men, and sometimes there are bad ministers of the gospel. So, also, there are bad domestics. But, as a class, I believe domestics use their power for the benefit, rather than the injury of society, as much so as any other class. Most of the work, that is necessary to sustain the family state, is actually done by them, the sick are taken care of by their help, children are nursed and taken care of by them, and the comfort of a family is promoted by their services, to a degree never realized till their help is gone.

No class in the community do more in promoting the comfort, health, and prosperity of society than domestics. It thus appears, that they are an honourable and respectable class In society, not only because they have great power to do good, but because they actually use this, power beneficially, to a very great extent.

LETTER Yl,

The reasons why the station of a domestic is not regarded as so honourable as it really is. My Friends :

It is probable that, while reading the previous letter, you have thought to yourselves, but why, if domestics are so honourable in station and office, are they not regarded so ? Why are they not treated with honour and respect ? Why is their situation spoken of as one of the lowest and least honourable ?

I will point out some of the reasons for this.

One reason is, the remains of aristocratic notions in our country, which lead people to feel that labour is degrading, and to honour persons, rather for the kind of work they are employed in, than for their character.

I will first explain what 1 mean by aristocratic notions. We are descended from the English nation^ and their plan of government is exactly opposite to ours. I have shown you that our plan of government is like that adopted by the shipwrecked company. Nobody is required to give up any thing, or to do any thing but what is for the good of the whole community. Though our lot in life is decided by the God of Heaven, yet we make our own rules and laws, choose our own rulers and overseers, and nobody is obliged to do any thing, which is not as necessary for his own good, as it is for the good of all the rest.

But in aristocratic lands, it is very much as it was in the story w^hen the strongest, by fighting, got the best of every thing, while the w^eakest were obliged to take the poorest of every thing. In England all the power is in the hands of the queen, a few nobles, and a small portion of the richest and best educated people, and for age after age it has been so. In consequence of this, the laws and customs of that nation have been made to benefit this small portion of the nation, so that most of the wealth has been accumulated in their hands, while the great body of the people are miserably poor.