Bye-Words. A collection of tales new and old

Preface

. Some of these Tales in illustration of proverbs and bye-words have previously appeared, the others see the light for the first time. All the historical ones are intended to describe what might have been rather than what actually was, except ' Buy a Broom,' which is founded on one of the many stories of the adventures of Charles V. in disguise. ' Our Ghost at Fantford,' ' Anna's Wedding Cake,' and even ' Patty Applecheeks,' all have a certain slight foundation in fact. C. M. YONGE. November 6, 1879. CONTENTS. PAGE The Boy Bishop i One Will and Three Ways 39 Kaspar's Summer Dream Si Buy a Broom 125 The Travels of Two Kits 185 Selma's Secret Sighs 229 Our Ghost at Fantford 257 Anna's Wedding Cake 273 Autobiography of Patty Applecheeks . . . - 285 A Holiday Engagement ; or, The Campbells are Coming THE BOY BISHOP. To ilka blade of grass its ain drap o' dtw. E

Chapter I. Four

hundred and seventy years count for little in the history of those huge circles of enormous stones that stand mysteriously upon Salisbury Plain. Their massive triplets rose in the same strange loneliness then as now, and cast the selfsame strange shadows as they barred the light ofthe September sun, whose low beams, coming from the east, made all the Down one glancing, sparkling frosted sheet of dew, netted over with countless diamond-hung lines of gossamer strung from one bent to another. The stones — perhaps a little more complete and with a few more stones lying across the top of their sup porters — struck the eye with wonder as they do still, but the explanation given to the traveller was uttered much more unhesitatingly. ' Those stones, my Lord ? They are the same which the great wizard Merlin brought in one night from Africa at the bidding of King Vortigern, by art magic.

From which the saints defend us ! ' Wherewith Sir Martin, the Parson of Ambresbury, or Amesbury, crossed himself. He was riding among a numerous cavalcade of B Tlie Boy Bis/iop. 4 clergy and their attendants, in close attendance upon a slightlymade man, with a keen, thoughtful, refined face, wrapped in a dark robe lined with lamb's skin, whose hood covered his shaven head. His cross-bearer and the other chief attendants were some way in the rear, riding at ease until they should enter some village or town, when the Church bells would ring, and they would form into procession, as befitted the new Bishop, Robert Hallam, making his first visitation of his diocese. He had slept at Amesbury, and was on his way to his Cathedral, where he was to be welcomed with all due pomp and splendour. His reply was, ' So have I read in the " Chronicles of Geoffrey of Monmouth."

Shall we lose too much time if we view them nearer ? ' ■ Your Lordship's way lies not far from them,' returned the priest, who was convoying him ; ' and by this fair rising sun, in such holy company, methinks no ill can befall ; but the stones have an ill-fame, my Lord. They were brought hither by magic, and it is said that on yonder altar-stone offerings of men were made, and that their spirits yet haunt the place.' 'Yea,' added the Bishop's secretary, who rode not far off, a young scholar from Oxford, ' it was there that foul slaughter was done upon the Britons by Henghist, wherefore they be called Stone Heng — the stones of Henghist ! Hark ! ' ' They moan still ! ' exclaimed the fat sumpnour. ' Go no farther, my Lord.' ' Nay, if such poor spirits be in bondage here, it were well to enquire whether they may be released,' said the Bishop. ' How say you, Master Dixon ? ' ' I say,' replied the secretary, smiling, that the spirits must be near akin to the Egyptian stone that made sweet music when the morning sunbeams played upon it — ' For a sweet childish voice was heard coming as it were out of the midst of the circle of stones.

The sumpnour crossed himself, and an awe-struck whisper went round. ' They moan and gibber.' ' No ill spirit walks after sunrise,' said the chaplain reprovingly. 'Norsingeth such joyous noels,' added the Bishop. ' Hearken again ! ' And this time there was no doubt that it was a clear, childish voice that was singing sweetly, with joyous, ringing notes the quaint old carol — ' The moon shone bright, and the stars gave a light, A little before it was day ; Our Lord, our God, He called on us, And bade us awake and pray. The fields were green as green could be, When from His glorious seat Our Lord, our God, He watered us With His heavenly dew so sweet.' Pushing forward a little on his mule, Bishop Hallam saw, as though framed by three massive stones, a number of sheep, the low sun lighting on their woolly backs as they browsed on the short grass within the mystic circle, and seated on the very altar stone itself, their little shepherd, the singer, his fair hair glancing in the morning sun, and his little crook in his hand, all unknowing that he was observed, as with the joyous unconsciousness of the birds them selves, he poured forth his sweet notes of song.

The Bishop made a motion with his hand to hinder any interruption, and his eyes filled with tears as he whispered to his chaplain the Latin words, ' " The weaned child shall put his hand on the cockatrice den." I thank Heaven for such a sparkling dew-drop of the morning of my episcopate ! ' By this time a rough-looking dog had run up from the opposite side of the circle, and begun to bark. The little shepherd broke off his song and turned, much amazed at the various dark figures he saw invading his solitude. ' Come hither, my child,' called the Bishop, as the face, fair-featured and rosy with true Saxon beauty, was turned towards him. ' Come hither, and tell me thy name.' ' I see who it is,' said Sir Martin. ' It is the child who herds the sheep of the nunnery at Amesbury. His mother, a widow, died in the hospitium, and the Sisters have fed and clothed him, and bred him up at their porter's lodge.

Make thine obedience, boy ; this is the Lord Bishop.' The child, with a readiness that did credit to the nurture of the good nuns, came forward, bared his fair flaxen head, kneeling down for the blessing of the Bishop. ' What is thy name, my fair child ? ' asked Hallam when he had blessed him with uplifted hand. ' Oswald, an it please your reverence,' replied the little fellow, who seemed about nine years old, and looked up with a face as winning as it was fair. ' Who taught thee to sing so sweetly ? ' ' The good Sisters,' shyly answered the boy ' They taught thee whatever thou knowest, I'll be sworn,' said Sir Martin. ' How art thou not afraid to be all alone in the midst of the Wizard's stones ? Not another lad would dare feed his flock there ? ' The boy's bright blue eyes were full of a sort of amused wonder as he simply said, ' I crossed me.' ' Thou art right, my son,' said the Bishop. ' There is nothing in these heathen stones to hurt a Christian child who does his duty well and singeth such goodly songs.

So the good Sisters have taught thee to sing ? Knowest thou thy Credo ? ' The boy, with feet close together, stood straight up and rehearsed the Creed in the strange form to which tradition had reduced the Latin. Yet it had a musical sweetness of cadence, and the Bishop found he likewise knew the English version. ' It is well, my fair child,' said Bishop Robert. ' Here is a silver groat for thee, and thou mayst tell the good Lady Prioress that the new shepherd doth bless and thank her for so tending a lamb of his flock.' ' Yea,' he added, as he rode on, 'it is a sight I thank God for. Would that I may tend my flock as carefully, if not as blithesomely, as yonder little child in the morning sunshine ! ' ' Poor child,' said another of the Amesbury clergy, ' I trow he seeks t,he spot because none of the other herd boys dare enter the ring of magic stones, and he is safe from being mocked and jeered at as my Lady Prioress' messan dog, when he will not share in their ill-doings.' ' It were well,' said the Chaplain, ' to have so goodly a voice in your Lordship's choir.' ' Cage the singing-bird, quotha ? ' returned the Bishop. ' Were that a good deed ? ' ' So please you, my Lord, I think it were,' said the Parson of Amesbury. ' As Brother Giles hath been telling me, the child hath been somewhat cockered by the good Sisters, to whom he hath been a right pleasant toy, as a cosset lamb might be, ever since his mother came dying to their door.

Now, even like the lamb, he hath grown too big for a nun's toy, and they wot not what to do with him. They have of late sent him out with their sheep, and put him to the like acts of service ; but he is tenderly nurtured, and of a meek and godly frame, so that the lads of his own degree flout and chase him, till he is fain to hide himself from them in the Wizard's ring, where none of them will enter.' ' Yea,' added Brother Giles, as the Bishop's look of enquiry rested on him, ' it is but a few days since that the Lady Prioress spake to me of her care on his account, and asked whether he could not find a place in some chapel ; or even become a scholar at St. Mary's at Winchester. He hath good gifts, and might well rise, even like the Lord Archbishop himself, from being a shepherd on the Downs to being a shepherd of men.' ' Ah well ! ' said the Bishop. ' It might seem pity to take the shepherd lad from his hills of glistening dew to the dust and clamour of cities, but it seems there are perils for him even here. If the Prioress will let him go, let us ask for him, and strive that at least the dew of Grace be never withdrawn or parched up from him ! '

Chapter II

' Is it well to license this children's procession ? ' said Bishop Robert Hallam to the Dean of his Cathedral, as they paced up and down the cloistered walk, in the alternate light and shadow of its arches. ' The common folk will be much displeased if it be hindered another year,' returned the Dean. ' They claim it as their right in all Cathedral Churches, and as your reverent Lordship well knows, there is a special rite provided for it in the great book of the holy Saint Osmond himself, proper to our own Cathe dral of New Sarum.' ' True,' replied Bishop Robert. ' The custom was devised by some pious man to show how truly out of the mouths of babes and sucklings might come forth praise ; but what with the naughtiness of childhood, and the lewdness of the people, and far more the neglect of the clergy, it may become a mere day of profane ribaldry, even within the sanc tuary.' ' Even so,' returned the Dean. ' They deem it their day of license.

The last Childermas Day, when the Episcopus Puerorum came in procession, the rabble spread through the whole building. They sat in the stalls, and sang profane songs. One of the best stoles was lost, four windows cracked, an arm of St. Edward's image was broken, and the tail of St. Margaret's dragon ; one woman was trodden to death, and two men fought with staves at the west door so hotly that a lay brother who tried to part them, got his hand maimed for life ; more than a score of purses were cut in the scuffle ; I myself stumbled over a man lying in a dead drunken fit by this very cloister door that same night, and the foulness and filth that were left were such that the sacristan had to borrow six lay brothers to help in the cleansing. Since that we have tried to stave off such a day of riot.

One winter there was a fever in the town, the next there was a flood, such that the water came half-way up the pillars in the nave, then came the death of the last Bishop ; and from one cause or another we have contrived to hinder it ; but now, as I am told, the townsfolk declare they will no longer see their children baulked of their lawful sport, and if we take not the lead, and cause the Boy Bishop to be elected from among our own choristers, they will make one of their own, burst into the Cathedral, and there will be nought but mad revelry and ribaldry.' Tlie Boy Bishop. 12 ' We have a right, then, Master Dean, to elect our own chorister-bishop ? ' ' Aye, my Lord. By the statutes he must be one of the choristers, who hath sung long in the Church, and is also handsome and wellformed in face and limb.

No other choice is valid. Moreover in the twelfth year of King Edward the Second, it was ordained that the Episcopus Puerorum should make no feast, since such tended only to riot and debau chery.' ' Then,' said the Bishop, ' we must do our best to turn the feast to edification, as the good men designed who intended it ! Methinks we have one child in the choir who will not only fulfil the statute by his fairness of face and limb, but will lead the holy song with a heart full of praise, and do his best to hinder any profanity.' ' Your Lordship means little Oswald of Amesbury,' said the Dean. ' He is a fair and towardly child, and hath a sweet voice, though he be not quick of wit. Moreover being a lone orphan, he is the more suitable, as none will have claims upon him. Your Lordship is aware that any benefice in your gift which falls vacant between the feast of St. Nicolas and Childermas Day, is at the bestowal of the Boy Bishop.' ' So I had heard.' ' Indeed,' added the Dean, ' I was credibly told that much of this vehemence on the part of the com monalty was the work of Denis, the Fletcher, in the hope that his son Diccon may play the part of Bishop, and bestow any preferment there may be to give on his brother Piers, a fellow whom, for his evil life and rude brawls, we had to cast out from the choir some years since, and who hath since — as I hear — become a begging friar, and goeth his rounds as a par doner.' ' This Diccon is a chorister, I think,' said the Bishop. ' A black-browed lad — not ill-favoured, save that he hath a scowl — and with a good voice, if he would pay heed to what he is doing, and would not sing as though he were in an ale-house.' ' The very lad, my Lord.

If he were chosen, only mischief could ensue ; and yet if he be not chosen, his father may belike work even worse harm.' ' Worse he cannot work,' said Hallam, ' than the profanity it would be in us to entrust the leading of such holy rites to a lad like Diccon, who as yet knows nought of holy fear, and would make them a mere jest. See, Master Dean, this shall be what we will do. We will gather the children ofthe choir in the Chapter house, and I will there speak to them, and make them understand the meaning of the service. After which we will cause the most meet to be elected, and endeavour our utmost that the day shall be to the glory of God, and not to His dishonour.' The Dean agreed, for Bishop Hallam was not a man to be gainsaid, and moreover had a power of infusing something of his own spirit into those whom he addressed.

Hitherto the Chapter had been wont to think of the Procession .of the Boy Bishop as a kind of crisis to be tided over with as little damage and scandal as might be, but the manner of Bishop Hallam was awakening the Dean to a sense of its original intention. For Hallam was a man of deep devotion, and was keenly alive to the abuses of the Church of the fifteenth century, and anxious to revive the true spirit of piety. In the two years since he had come to Salisbury, much that was amiss had been amended in the diocese, and there had been much quickening of zeal and devotion, while proportionate discontent and anger had been excited in those who hated inter ference with their ease, their profits, their vices, or their superstitions. Among the improvements he had introduced, was the much greater attention paid to the children of the choir.

Till his time they had been drilled and flogged into performing their parts in the service, but with utter indifference whether they understood the words which their voices chanted, and likewise to their conduct, both in and out of Church. The same lad who would be beaten savagely for a false note, might tell falsehoods, steal apples, and devour them in the Cathedral with impunity so far as the authorities were concerned. Now, however, the boys were carefully schooled under the care of a clerk appointed by the Precentor, who was deservedly viewed as a gentle master, in spite of his profuse employment of the rod, the only means of discipline. However, he heartily loved his boys, and most of them loved him, though none so well as little Oswald of Amesbury, the very flower of the choir for his fair face, sweet voice, and gentle reverence, though his wit was perhaps less keen and bright than some of the others.

Slow he was in learning to read either manuscript or prick song, and still slower in comprehension of the Latinity which the boys were taught. At least, each of the others could more quickly translate a word, or conjugate a verb, and yet he could chant Psalms for ever, and there were looks and tones that made his master sure that he entered into the mean ing, even though he could not explain it. At the summons, the choir boys trooped into the beautiful Chapter-house, and stood round the tall central column of Purbeck marble supporting the groined roof. Their eyes did not as usual rest on the quaint figures in which the Scripture history is portrayed round the walls, but were eagerly fixed on the Bishop, who with the Dean, and others of the clergy round him, stood beneath the pillar. The foremost boy, dark-eyed and haired, with heavy brows, was Richard, or Diccon, the son of the Fletcher, or arrow maker.

He stood forth with a confident and eager air, while the others hung back a little, and among their brown heads could be seen the bright, light flaxen locks of the little shepherd of Stonehenge. 'Children,' asked the Bishop, 'do ye understand wherefore I have called you hither ? ' 'To choose our Bishop !' said Diccon (he had very nearly said to choose me). ' Know you wherefore the Procession of the Boy Bishop was instituted ? ' further demanded the Bishop. 'To make sport, and get alms,' replied Diccon without hesitation. ' Can none of you render me any other reason ? ' asked the Bishop. No one spoke, but Oswald looked up with an eagerness in his eyes, as if he knew something, but could not utter it. Then Bishop Robert told the boys in words they could understand, how the Holy Innocents had been the first to glorify the Saviour in His infancy by their martyrdom, and how they were now sharing His victory and triumph in Heaven ; and how it had been planned by good men of old that the little children trained to sing the praise of God on earth, should, on the day of the Innocents, set forth before men's eyes some slight sign and token of how these children and the like pure and holy souls, redeemed out of this sinful world, while yet their baptismal dew was un dried, and they were untainted by sin, follow the Lamb in Heaven, and sing the song that none other can learn.

The boys all listened with bent heads, some with thoughtful faces ; and Oswald's eyes were moist. No one spoke. ' None can be worthy enough, you are thinking, my children, to represent thus on earth the holy ones in Heaven. It is sooth, only too sooth. But we must do our best by God's grace to cleanse ourselves, body and soul, to set forth His praise and honour. Now speak, my dear children, and say which of you ye think most true and pure, and most meet to be your leader in this solemn work of praise.' There was a pause ; the boys were unwilling to speak, and the Precentor again put the question — ' Speak, lads ; tell my Lord whom you think the best and meetest to lead you in the holy work on Childermas Day. What sayest thou, Harry of the Forge ? Fear not. Say on.' Harry, an open-faced boy, was the first to say — C ' Little Oswald is the best lad of us.' And then, one after another made the same reply — ' Little Oswald is meetest.' Only three had not yet spoken — Oswald, Diccon, and a timid, shy boy, who always seemed trying to hide himself.

When the question was put to the last, he faltered out — ' Diccon, sir.' And Diccon himself looked up with bold, un abashed brow, and said — ' I'm oldest here, sir.' 'Thou mayst be oldest,' said the Bishop, 'but that is not what we are bidden to think of. The matter in hand is to take him who will most heartily and truly strive to praise God, and lead men to think of the choirs of the saints before His throne. My son, is that what thou dost think of in desiring this pre ferment ? ' ' As much as another,' muttered Diccon, as sulkily as he durst. But out of the four-and-twenty lads there had been twenty-one voices declaring little Oswald the best. There was no doubt about his election. He had indeed replied ' Harry,' when asked for his vote, and when the Bishop laid his hand on him, and declared him elected as Episcopus Puerorum, he looked dazed and bewildered.

Some of the chapter observed to one another — ' Fair as an Angel indeed, but a mere puppet.' And Diccon went away muttering that his father would see him righted, or know the reason why. c

Chapter III

Whoever devised the ritual of the Boy Bishop must have been Trying to wind himself too high For sinful men beneath the sky. Beautiful as was the idea, and exquisite as the service was, it could scarce be carried out consistently by any human creatures on earth ; and, in the Middle Ages, in a tongue not ' understanded of the people,' and left to rude provincial ecclesiastics amid a ruder mob, the ceremony had degenerated into a popular holiday when sacrilegious profanity was in a manner licensed. It was on St. Nicolas' day, the 6th of December, that the election took place, and the little Bishop continued in office till Innocents' day, the 28th. The early part of these three weeks was spent in training and singing, after which, when Mass was over on Christmas Day, the whole band of choristers went from house to house, in miniature ecclesiastical vest ments, singing hymns and Christmas carols, and the two appointed deacons presenting bags, where alms were collected to maintain the lads if they continued to be educated for the priesthood.

To prevent these customs from degenerating into idle roaming and shouting, the Dean had provided that the troop should be attended by trustworthy men, who kept order, and prevented them from being disturbed. It was fine frosty weather, and the boys went blithely forth, crackling through the ice-bound meadows, or climbing the downs, ever getting fresh views of the majestic spire, then only recently finished, and com pleting the wondrous grace of the whole building, which, in its freshness and unity yet variety, of peak, roof, and pinnacle, seemed like some magnificent ice berg rising in the midst of its valley. Little Oswald was very happy that first morning. What he would have liked would have been to have gone to Amesbury, and to have sung before the kind nuns there, who would have rejoiced to see him in such array.

The master, however, decided that this would be too far on these short days, and scarcely safe ; for Salisbury Plain was not free from robbers, under the disturbed reign of Henry IV., and they might not even respect a Boy Bishop's bag of alms. However, Oswald was consoled by hearing that notice of his promotion had been sent, and that it was not impossible that his dear Lady Prioress might be present at the Cathedral itself on Childermas Day. The only drawback was the surly manner and continual petty taunts and vexations he suffered from Diccon Fletcher. The lad had been, by way of con solation, made one of the attendant deacons, who had their share both of finery and of money ; but this gave him the opportunity of venting his spite in many a ' nip and bob,' sly pushes, threats, and attempts to put him out in his singing, and what Oswald hated far more, introducing idle parodies on the sacred words, which long had been part of the traditional grotes queness attached to the ceremony in the popular mind.

These set the other boys — even Harry — giggling, and disposed Oswald to cry, while their master never was able to detect them, and the whole choir were too much afraid of Diccon to betray him. The master only saw that as the day went on the boys were harder to manage, and that the little Bishop's head drooped under his small mitre, and he was glad to bring them home after they had rested and been regaled with wassail bread and spiced ale, and presented with a comfit apiece by the kind admiring nuns of the Abbey at Wilton. Their next day's rounds were in the city of Salisbury itself, where they sang in each of the chief houses of the nobles and gentry, who were apt to come into the city for the winter, and likewise in the streets and courts where the shops consisted of open stalls or booths, with the wares arranged in front, or hanging from the beams of the floor above.

Thus it was they came to the stall of Denis the Fletcher, father to Diccon, where long yew bows and cloth yard shafts in quivers, or arranged in a chevaux de frise, were the chief decoration. Friar Piers, a red-faced, bronzed man, about thirty, in a Franciscan's gown and hood, was sitting at his ease in the corner of the stall, and joined the carol in a loud, lusty voice, unblushingly using the worst form of parody. When the song was over, he broke into a loud laugh, and on some remonstrance from the master, answered — ' What, sir clerk, I'm no slave to your Bishop. He can't mar the jolly friar's sport, do what he will to these poor boys. Times are changed since I lifted up my voice in the choir.' 'Aye, aye,' said his father, a big, brawny man, leaning over the window, 'then 'twas worth one's while to be Boy Bishop.

Now I wouldn't give a tuft of goose down for it, nor Diccon either — only bedizen ing and psalm-singing, like mean beggarly Lollards. But come in, my lads, come in, and we'll show you some sport for once.' The master here interfered, and said the Dean's and Precentor's orders were precise that the boys should enter no houses. Friar Piers on this laughed, and said — ' They mistook the season, Master. Dost think they are creeping to the cross ? It's merry Christmas, man, not Lent.' ' There ! there's gospel for it. Hear the reverend brother,' cried Denis. ' Come in, boys— come in, gossips ; there's a brimming cup of hot ale for you this cold day, better than any your Dean e'er gave you.' The master still refused, but half the boys had been already led in by Diccon, and some of the escort were not proof against the good ale and good fellow ship, and entered after the boys.

The master hardly knew what to do, whether to follow them in and try to bring them away, or to take home such as he could detain. While he was still in the gathering twilight, calling and entreating, Oswald suddenly felt a heavy hand on his shoulder. ' I don't want to come in,' he tried to say, a good deal frightened ; but he was dragged along, with a hand over his mouth, into a dark entry beside the shop, and heard Denis's rough voice in his ear — ' ' Stand still, thou nuns' mammet, a plague on thee, or it shall be the worse for thee. Hold thy tongue and hearken. Knowest thou what thou deservest for thrusting thyself into the office that belonged of right to my Dick ? ' ' The Boy Bishop. 25 ' Oh, sir, 'twas none of my seeking. Let me go.' ' Whisht ! I say, I grudge thee not thy fool's cap and sorry sport, so long as thou makest up for it in weightier matters.