Our Detachment

Chapter I

A SUBALTERN ALONE. s WAS on duty that day, and couldn't get out, ■*■ and awfully dull work I found it, leaning out of my window, and trying to catch a glimpse of the town and its inhabitants, over the top of the horrid blank AA7all that bounded our horizon — in an earthward direction I mean, for, looking upwards, certainly there was plenty of a blue Summer sky to be seen, flecked with white fleecy clouds ; but I had seen lots of that kind of thing any day this hot Summer ; and though I won't deny it is pretty, still a fellow can't always be star-gazing ; or if he is, he is B VOL. I. pretty sure to fall into some desperate grief here below — worse even than the old cove we used to read about in our Grecian history. Then there were distant mountain tops in view, looking so sunny and heathery and tempt ing that they were an aggravation rather than a solace — more particularly as I knew that just under them lay a beautiful lake, renowned for its fishing ; and that on that very delicious day my captain, Lord Claude Feversham, had gone to inspect it, and try his luck.

" At any rate, it's a bad day for sport," I mused — " too bright altogether ; and I'm glad of it, for it's a beastly shame to leave me mewed up here alone, and all the other fellows off amusing themselves. I'd bet five bob Mayleigh will be able to tell, when he comes in, the whole history and ante cedents of that pretty pair of feet I saw yester day as we marched into the town. It is too bad, for it was I saw them first, and pointed them out to him, and now he will take all the credit of the discovery to himself." " I say, there's an old hag selling gooseberries just outside the gate. I wonder could I hit her with a bit of plaster off the wall here, and make her bring me some. They'll be down on me now for barrack damages, I suppose; but Feversham needn't think he can shut up Mad cap Darrell a whole afternoon alone, in such a confounded dull hole as this, without seeing a little alteration in the place when he comes back.

Bravo ! that hit her. Now she is looking this way. I say you, Biddy, Peggy, whatever your name is, how do you sell those things ?" " Twopence a quart, your honour, bless your purty face, my little master," answered the old thief with a grin that showed all her toothless gums. " Confound her impudence !" I thought — " what does she mean by speaking in that Avay to me, Vivian Darrell, junior ensign in Her Majesty's — th foot." So I answered her stiffly, as I flatter myself I can on occasion. " Come, I Avant none of your chaff. Remem ber, you are addressing an officer in Her Majesty's service, and I'll have you placed under arrest if you don't keep a civil tongue in your head." " Och ! murder, yer honour !" she cried, bob bing a series of curtsies, and crossing herself as she looked up at my window.

" Sure it's no B2 offence I meant, my purty dear, but I thought as you were the Captain's little boy, as I'd heard tell about — him as came down a day or two ago, and got a house in the town, your honour. Sure and I could only see your head and shoulders, dearie, so I couldn't tell if you were bigger nor him. But don't tell the min to take me up, agra, for a pursier dear I never seen, and I've seen a many, being sixty years old next Lady-day. Devil a lie I'm telling you, yer honour." There the old harridan stood, gazing up with her blear eyes at my window, and though pretending to put up her wares, evidently not with the least intention of moving as long as I would listen. However, her aspersions on my appearance and dignity were more than I could bear, and I made up my mind I would even do without the gooseberries, and the amusement they might have afforded me, rather than by buying them encourage this woman in the belief I was little Ussher ; though why men shouldn't eat gooseberries as well as boys of ten or twelve, I couldn't think.

Indeed I knew they did, for I had seen our serjeant-major half an hour before investing in some, which he swallowed skins and all, the beast, if I'm not much mistaken. Indeed, I don't believe I'd have thought of get ting them but for his example. So I said with great dignity and severity, "You may go iioav, good woman — I shan't take any of your fruit, and you'd better learn to know an officer when you see him, before you come into barracks again." " Sure now, and didn't your honour call me ?" she answered, with the greatest assurance. "And maybe, if you'll not be afther taking the berries, you'll give me the price of a plaister, Captain dear, for the place where your honour hit me with a stone, when I was sitting there beyant." " I never threAV a stone at you, you fool," I cried, angrily.

I give you my word the thing she called a stone was a bit of mortar about an inch square, and it hit her on the old rag of a shawl she wore round her shoulders. I don't like to be imposed on, and I Avould give her the money, in a minute Avhen she chose to recognize me as an officer in Her Majesty's service, only that she asked for it on that plea, so I went on. " It was only a bit of plaister off the window here struck you ; and it is not for your hurt you want it, for you were not hurt, but to get a glass of whiskey, or something. Get along with you out of barracks. Do you think I don't know the Avhole set of you." As I spoke I got up from the chair in which I had been sitting, intending to leave the win doAv, and so end the discussion, as there were several of the men hanging about, and they were rather inclined to laugh, I thought.

But when the harridan saAv me standing up, perceiving by my height, I suppose, that I really was what I had given myself out to be, she uttered a hoAvI, and catching up her basket, hurried off, crying out, " Holy Mother of Moses, he's coming afther me ! Bad luck to ye, ye yellow-skinned, black eyed spalpeen, that wouldn't give an old body that's sixty come next Lady-day a penny piece to cure the blow you gave her. Faix it's meself believes his mammy doesn't give him money yet, till he gets big enough to take care of it." This was too much ; so, putting my head out of the window again, I called out, "Hold hard there, you old thief! For the credit of Her Majesty's service, I suppose I'd better give you something ; so take that, and get drunk as soon as you like, only don't let me see you in the barracks again, or I'll have you arrested."

Just as I uttered this threat, and threw half a-crown to her at the same time, who should pass across the square but our Serjeant-Major, and he, overhearing my threat, burst into a most disrespectful laugh. " Come," I said, turning to him, " let me hear no more of that, Green. Do you think you were sent here to ridicule your officers ? I'll let Captain Feversham know how you behave, and we'll see what he says to such conduct. Ah ! she's gone now. I say, Green, like a good fellow, don't let her in again. She's an aAvful old woman, and she'd turn the barracks upside down in no time." Noav perhaps you may think this all very extraordinary, but I'll tell you the whole state of the case, if you will keep it dark ; only I don't want the ladies to knoAV, as they would call me a boy, and laugh at me.

I am ViAdan Darrell, the only son of Viscount Traverscourt, and you see they made such a piece of Avork about me at home that I was never allowed to go to school, or any of those places, but always had a tutor. He Avas a good felloAv, too, and was up to a lark, so that we got into no end of scrapes together; when Claude Feversham came to spend last Christmas with us, and advised my going up for my examination for the line, I rather think my parents were not quite sorry to have a chance of a quieter house in future. I passed, as you knoAV, or else I should not be here, and was gazetted to the — th, my cousin Claude's regiment. He is my Captain, and the jolliest brick going ; but I wish I had a way of paying him out for leaving me alone like this, our first day in a strange town. I always tell our felloAvs I am tAventy, and I think they believe it, because I am very dark, which makes a man look older, but this is what I am going to confess, and which I hope you will keep secret — the truth is, I was only eighteen the other day.

I begged Claude not to betray me, and though I could not get him to promise, yet I think he will not, and that is the only thing that keeps me from having my revenge on him, for his beastly selfishness in going off to take his pleasure, aud leaving me to take care of the barracks. You see he might tell all about me, if I Avas to be very hard on him, and I don't think it worth while paying a fellow off, unless I can come doAvn on him well. We marched into this little country town in the south of Ireland yesterday. I don't go in for praising scenery, you know, it looks spoony, but I don't mind allowing the mountains are very fine, and I am told there is fishing both by lake and river, yachting, shooting, and, for ladies' men, croquet and dancing. I am not a lady's man, you understand. I believe I once had a weakness that way just after I joined, but when I proposed, whilst helping my partner and the object of my admiration to champagne cup at a ball, she answered, with a laugh, " Thank you, but I do find little boys just into jackets so troublesome, and as I have two little brothers of that age to mind, I don't feel equal to undertaking care of a third."

You can imagine what I suffered then, for really the girl was as pretty as any girl could be, with lots of fair hair like spun glass ; after that cruel answer, she went off to dance with a tall, dark fellow in the Blues, she was flirting with, and I heard she married him afterwards. Can you Avonder that since then I have hated the sex, and that a constant puzzle to me, when ever I let my thoughts revert to that painful subject, is how she found out my age ? — for I had taken good care a few minutes before to tell her I was three and twenty. As I said, we came in here yesterday. On our way from the terminus to the barracks, I pointed out to Mayleigh a pair of the prettiest feet and ankles possible to see Avalking a little way in front ; but we had not overhauled them when we were obliged to turn up a by street, and so lost sight of them.

Now I knoAV well it is after those feet Mayleigh Avent out to day, saying he was just going to see the town and take a stroll, and Feversham has gone out fishing, as I said, and Ussher is somewhere mooning about Avith his wife, I suppose ; the other two felloAvs said they were going up the lake, and perhaps they did, but they agreed to come back to lunch, and ordered me to have some for them. Catch me, that's all ! I've had no walk to give me an appetite, so I'll let them Avait till I get one. I must have some gooseberries." " I say, Potter," I cried to a soldier passing, "just run and get me a gallon of gooseberries from that old woman ; but don't tell whom they are for, as I don't wish to encourage her hanging about the barracks." So he went and bought me the gallon of gooseberries, and for a time I got on very well, having found a note-book of Mayleigh's, which I began illustrating with extracts from his his tory, calculated to drive him rabid, when he should see all his little weaknesses figuring in highly-finished etchings, and exhibited round the table.

As I drew I sucked my fruit, and worked away till my fingers got stiff; even my liking for the dainty before me could not induce me to finish them. What should I do with them? I would not give them to the others, for I was sure they did not deserve them. Stay ! I have it ! I rushed off to our messman, got a large flat dish, poured what remained on to that, and then proceeded to Feversham's room, where I concocted, for his benefit, a very clever ly-constructed bed of the apple-pie kind. My tutor had taught me how to make them, with this difference, he had never used a dish of gooseberries as the foundation of his structures. It would have been impossible, when all was finished, to guess there was anything unusual in the bed, and I danced a frantic pas seul of delight at the success of my stratagem.

" It wasn't done much too soon, either ; for I had hardly returned to my own room again, and resumed my post by the windoAvs, Avhen Mayleigh, Flower, and Preston entered the square all together. They were very busy talking, and did not perceive me until I hit Mayleigh in the eye with a gooseberry skin. " There is that confounded young monkey Madcap at his tricks again !" said Mayleigh, loud enough for me to hear. "I'll spoil his black little figure-head some day for him, if he doesn't mind?" " I hope you have not been very dull, Mad cap ?" called Flower up to me. " I expect the barracks are not the better for being under your care so long. How many fights have you got up since we went out this morning ?" "Stow that chaff, Flower, will you?" I retorted, sulkily. You see, it is a shame to be always bringing up a fellow's old ignorances against him, and this is what FloAver was al luding to : One day, not long after I had first joined, I had been left alone as I was to-day, and roaming in a very idle frame of mind about the square, I came suddenly on two of the men quarrelling.

They were calling each other no end of bad names, and looked mischievous enough ; so I said, " Well, there's no good in you two fellows going on like that ; hard words break no bones, and give no satisfaction either, I think ; you are so evenly matched at them. Try a round or two, and I'll be umpire." No sooner said than done ; and they were hard at work at it, the little fellow walking well into the bigger one, when Avho should turn in, right on to us before we saw him coming, but Flower. " What on earth is all this ?" he cried. " Dar rell, what's up ?" " Only these two fellows were abusing each other, and I told them to take a turn with their fists whilst I acted umpire." " You two stop this instant," Flower said, turning very sharp on the men ; " and mind, if I hear any more of this, you will be pun ished.

And now, for Heaven's sake, Madcap, come away, and don't let me hear of your doing this kind of thing again ; it can't be al lowed, indeed, and you will get into awful hot water if you go on in that way." " Well, I don't see," I answered, " that it is any worse their pommelling themselves a little, and getting all rancour beaten out of them, than to go on calling each other ill names, and keeping up a constant spite." This is what he was bringing up at me again, and I don't like it ; though still, you see, I think I was right. Besides, as I told him then, my tutor always said every Englishman should knoAV hoAV to use his fists, and should use them too, if occasion required. Now, of course, you know, I understand it wouldn't suit the discipline of a regiment, but I don't think he need always be reminding me of the one or two little mistakes I made on first joining ; in deed, I know he Avas as bad, for he was always called Baby, and I should like to know which is worst, that name or Madcap ?

It riles him un common to call him Baby, so I put my head out of the window again, and shouted out, so that the sentry and everyone should hear — " I say, Baby, did your nurse take good care of you out? You would have been better, I am sure, in with me, and it would be much more manly than going out in leading-strings." " You infernal young monkey, won't you catch it if I get at you !" roared Flower, com ing in hurriedly, for some of the men about were laughing. " I'll break every bone in your little slippery body, if once 1 lay hands on you !" As he spoke he turned the key in the lock, so that I might not have the chance of escaping by the door. Then a frantic chase commenced, which Avas hard work to him, as I suspect he had always been too good a boy to go robbing orchards and climbing trees for nests, like other fellows.

It was a prime lark for me, however, and a good excuse for trying the springs of Mayleigh's arm-chair, which ahvays occupied a comfortable position near the fire ; for I had gone doAA7n to the ante-room when I saw Flower coming in a rage. Round and round the room we went, without ever, on my part, at least, touching the floor — from chair to table, from table back to chair, and so on, till I saw Flower was getting thoroughly pumped ; then, making him a profound boAV, I called out, " Good-bye, Baby dear ; this sort of thing is too much for your constitution, so I think 1 had better cut it short. I hope it will have got over its fractiousness by dinner-time ;" so saying, I sprang on to the window-sill, and dropped into the courtyard below. It was not much of a drop, about seven or eight feet, but I knew my friend would not follow me.

Fortunately I had snatched up my forage-cap as I left my room, so now the world was before me where to choose, and kissing my hand to Flower, who leaned out of the windoAV in a white heat, I clashed out of the barracks and down the steep, dirty hill that led into the town. It was not a bad place for an Irish country town, and I assure you I was quite astonished to see how respectable most of the inhabitants looked, my mother having mourned over me as one going amongst cannibals when she heard we were under orders for Ireland. She even wanted me to exchange into the Guards, but that I refused to do, for I should have lost the society of Claude, and Avith all his faults I like him ; besides, I think it is good for him to haA'e somebody always near to look after him. I think him a little inclined to be susceptible, you know, and am convinced my friendly ridi cule saved him from making a regular mess of himself once or twice before now.

Besides, I told the Mum I wanted to see a little active service, and, if anything happened to me there, I should be nearer home than if I Avas to go to any other savage country ; so, after a good deal of kissing and crying over me, she con sented to my going, after making me swear solemnly I would neither get shot nor become so contaminated by bad examples as to shoot anyone myself; and also that under no circum stances whatever would 1 leave off the flannels, of which she had provided me with a stock, or turn Roman Catholic. As I said, I was asc VOL. I. tonished to see the respectable look of the in habitants, and that there were actually two churches, nice-looking ones, too, besides schism shops of various denominations, and plenty of the regular religion of the country also. Why do some of those felloAvs wear petticoats ?

It is not a compliment to the old Avomen they re semble, for however well it may suit the old women, it is very unbecoming to them. There were shops too — grocers and butchers and bakers ; fruit shops, where, only that I had already had so many gooseberries that morning, I should have been tempted to spend some money on straAvberries, which were really very fine. There were also millinery and tailoring establishments, and at length, just after crossing a second bridge, and remarking that the water in the riArer was very low, I came on the queerest little hole, and the wonderful variety of articles displayed in the window tempted me to enter. Such an odd fish as I found in possession ! He capered round his counter, bowing and scraping the whole time as he did so ; then he brought forAvard a chair, placed it before me, and requested me to sit down.

This I did, whilst he, returning to his seat behind the counter, offered me some chocolate-cream bon bons, which I was pleased to accept. You see, that is another thing I don't like talked about, but I don't mind telling you — I am awfully fond of sweets, though, before people, I generally pretend I can't bear them — that they spoil one's palate for distinguishing the flavour of wines, oliA^es, and such-like things. I hate olives like poison, you know, but I always eat them when they appear at table ; it looks epicurean, and like a bon-vivant, who has had his tastes edu cated at Paris. Mercifully, here in the country they never have them, so I am spared that. By the way, this queer little wretch I had hunted up was called by the most magnificent name, out of those old histories you know. John Hampden was up over his shop-door, and he assured me everyone called him so.

Then you must imagine a person five feet nothing in height, yelloAV-skinned and dried up, with a whining voice and queer, skipping, hopping, C2 bustling movements ; a man, I should say, who devoted more of his energies to the collection of gossip than to the business of his trade. He told me he kept a pass-book with the barracks, and I might get anything I liked. Of course it would all be entered in the book at whatever price he chose to put on the articles afterAvards ; but we would not be pressed for payment till the regiment was leaving. " That is a very convenient way of dealing Avith gentlemen like the officers," he went on; " for, you see, often, young fellows come here not very flush of money, and if they could not get credit they would buy nothing. You are Captain Ussher's young gentleman, aren't you, sir?

Would you ask your Papa to favour me with his custom, whenever he wants anything in my line ?" " I am no connection of Captain Ussher's," I answered stiffly, rising and leaving the choco late creams behind me, so great was my indig nation. " I am one of the officers, and if you are not more respectful in your manner of speaking to me in future, I shall be obliged to give up coming here : it lowers the dignity of the service when its officers are treated with familiarity." " Oh, surely, sir, you are right," replied the little man, with a face expressive of the deepest concern. My determined conduct had evidently cowed him. " You see, sir, the last regiment was here, sir, they Avere such nice, friendly gentlemen, and took everything in good part. I used to have great fun with them, and was always up at the barracks ; but, you know, I was the only man in Belmurphy they were so friendly with.

Everyone's good to John Hampden, however, particularly the ladies ; they would not get their things at any other shop in town. Ah ! here come the Miss DashaAvays. Good morning, ladies ;" and then he began the same bowing performance over again, to which he had treated me. The girls were pretty, certainly, but bad style ; one of them tall, with dark hair and a very good complexion; the other dark also, but short, with fine eyes and pretty dark hair ; both of them decidedly good-looking, but not the style I care about. OUR DETACHAIENT. They looked at me for a minute very hard, then turned away and began business with the English patriot, whilst I rose and went out, determined to see more of the town, and men tally registering a vow that I would tAvist young Ussher's neck for him some day, if his father kept him down here ; and hoAV such a mistake could have been made Avhen I was in undress, I could not conceive.

" At any rate," I concluded, " as these fellows cannot recognise an officer in Her Majesty's ser vice when they see him, I will take preciously good care never to go out in ' mufti ' Avhilst I am here, except in the evening." Having taken this resolution, I AA'andered on, climbed a high green hill on the outskirts of the toAvn, that commanded a most delicious view of the country around, and finally returned to barracks, meeting, on my way back, several pairs of very pretty girls (I've said before that I don't care for the ladies ; but it sounds well to comment on beauty, even if you don't know one face from the other) ; and I arrived just in time to get ready for mess, where I discovered that Feversham had not yet returned, and that Flower had recovered his wonted good humour.

Chapter II

A RENCONTRE. OF course they were all down on me the minute I came in, wanting to know what I had seen and done. I had not much to tell them, as you know ; they had found out my friend John Hampden before me, but not the feet. No, to my great gratis] cation, Mayleigh was obliged to own he had failed in all his endeavours to unearth the possessor of that captivating pair of understandings. And Feversham did not come home till late — not that it mattered much, for I knew I must make up my mind to wait some time before I could see my ruse crowned with success. Therefore I was not impatient, when Claude returned in the highest possible spirits, and evidently greatly amused with his day's sport, though all that he had caught, as far as we could see, was one wretched trout, about two inches long.

We used to mess at half-past six, and it Avas long after that when Feversham returned ; we Avere able to question him about his day's ad ventures, as Ave sat over our Avine afterwards. Then his well-pleased air attracted attention, and Mayleigh asked, in his usual inquisitiAre manner, " What's up, Captain? You look as pleased as if you had discovered a gold mine." " So I have," answered Feversham, Avith his quiet smile, as he passed the decanter before him. " At least, if it is not a gold mine, it is a mine of amusement Avell Avorth its Aveight in gold, in this dull place." " Tell us all about it," we cried in chorus. " You Avould not keep such a treasure-trove to yourself." " You Avill find it out, my good fellows, in time, even if I tried to keep it ever so dark. It is not a light that will allow itself to be kept under a bushel, I can assure you."

He paused for a moment, and looked round on our attentive faces, with an amused glitter in his dark eyes ; then he Avent on : " You know when I went to Lough Glenty this morning, I had no permission to fish there, which I suppose I ought to have had — however, they told me here in town it belonged to General Bambridge, and that he was not very particular about preserving it. The day was too bright for doing much, but I got out my tackle, set it to rights, and then amused myself admiring the scenery, which is really magnificent. The lake is long and narrow, lying in the centre of a valley, shut in between such steep mountains that a great part of their height is sheer precipice, whilst the lower slopes, though steep enough too, are clothed with woods, that just now are bright with the young Summer green, and scented with thousands of flowers.