Zebedee V.

Front matter

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II

The hot sun of an August afternoon was pouring down upon the fields and hills around Pocahontas. The roads, which were inches deep with red clay in the spring, and whose frozen ruts were many and dangerous in the winter, were now heavy with yellow dust. The roadsides and bordering vegetation were thickly covered with it, and a rattling Dayton wagon, moving slowly along the pike, raised a yellow cloud.

The Dayton belonged to Mrs. Aaron Posey, who was returning from the funeral of Mr. Zebedee V. Slocum's second wife; with her were her two sisters — Mrs. “ Sissy ” Slocum and Miss Julia io

Higgins — and Mrs. Slocum’s guest, Mrs. Stansbury. Mrs. Posey had been intending to take Mrs. Stansbury “ to ride,” and the funeral afforded a good opportunity to combine duty with pleasure. The conversation of the four was of the departed Mrs. Slocum.

“ Well,” said Mrs. Posey, “ it ’s to be hoped ’t Zebedee V. Slocum ’ll pay more respect to pore Milly’s mem’ry ’n he did to Lucy White’s.”

“ Oh, well now, Annie Lee,” said her widowed sister, “ Zebedee V. had them eight child’en to look after, an’ a body cain’t blame a man with eight child’en for takin’ a helpmate ’s soon ’s he can get one.”

“ I don’t care,” said Mrs. Aaron, “ there ’s sech a thing ’s decency, eight child’en or not.”

“ For the land’s sakes ! ” exclaimed Mrs.

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Stansbury. “ Did they all eight belong to the first wife? ”

“ Every last one of ’em,” replied Mrs. Aaron, her tone almost suggesting a personal injury. “ Zebedee V. Slocum married Lucy White for her wealth and expectations, and I reckon she brought him less of one and more of the other ’n ever he counted on. It did n’t take him long to make an end of the money.”

“ I wonder she let him have control of it,” said Mrs. Stansbury, in the firm tone of a “ born manager.” “ What ’d he do with all them child’en?”

“ Do ? He did n’t do one single thing but put ’em all eight out visitin’. That ’s what he did. He stood ’em two days after Lucy White ’s laid away, an’ nen he put ’em all into the wagon with their clo’es, what they was of ’em, and took ’em around to visit. I thank my stars I was away 12 from home that day. Ef it had n’t been for old Mis’ Lewis Cary’s dyin’ so sudden at the last I would n’t ’a’ been, either ! ”

“ Was they cornin’ to visit you? ” asked Mrs. Stansbury.

“ Well, I reckon Zebedee V. Slocum knew ’s well ’s anybody else ’t I have five feather beds and set a good table. Zebedee V. Slocum always knows where to look for the butter for his bread. I on’y say ’t I thank my stars I was n’t home when that man drove around puttin’ his child’en to visit.”

“ Where ’d he put them ? ” asked Mrs. Stansbury.

“ Jest wherever he could,” said Mrs. Posey, emphatically.

“ Yes, that he did,” said Mrs. Slocum. “ He come to my house whilst I was a makin’ currant jelly. Everybody knows currant ’s the hardest kind to jell, and i3 everybody but a man ’d ’a’ kept out of the way ; and I do think ’t any man on earth but Zebedee V. Slocum ’d ’a’ gone away again when he see my trouble and worry. But not him. I never ’s so surprised in all my life ’s when I see him drivin’ into the side yard with his eight. He picked Thomasina and Gladys Virginia out of the wagon, and a little bundle of clo’es, and set ’em down in my kitchen. I ’s just that dumfoundered I could n’t say one word, and the jelly jest a-comin’ ! But Zebedee V. said enough to fit the occasion. He ’s lookin’ as solemn as a judge, and every inch the widower. ‘ Cousin Sissy,’ s’ys he, ‘ you ’re the widder o’ my own first cousin,’ s’ys he, ‘ and I feel ’t you got as good a right as any to be the comforter of my poor motherless half-orphans. I thought you ’d like to have these here little ones to make you a visit.’ And with that he up and walks out, and leaves ’em settin’ there with never a blink. It did seem like he might ’a’ took ’em home after a month or so, but he did n’t. Fin’lly the neighbors met and decided to jest return ’em, which they did. Mis’ Julius Todd drove around and collected ’em, and left ’em at Zebedee V.’s house ’ithout a word. He stood ’em jest one week, an’ nen he eloped with Milly Skinner.”

“ She from Pocahontas ? ” asked Mrs. Stansbury.

“ Um hum,” said Mrs. Aaron Posey. “ She was in high repute as a worker, and Zebedee V. Slocum thought she ’d oughter be able to raise up his eight. Milly was n’t goin’ to bother herself with other folks’s children, howsoever, and it seemed like she ’s been workin’ so hard all her life ’t she wanted to rest. Anyways, that ’s all she did, aiter she’s married; and it 15 was n't more 'n two year before she 's so fleshy she could n't scarcely move outen her chair. And here Tuesday she dropped dead!"

“ For the land's sakes ! " said Mrs. Stansbury. “ What 'll the child'en do for mournin' ? "

“ Well," said Mrs. Posey, “it 's a blessed good thing the style 's come in of wearin’ black on the arm. Zebedora and Florence 's got tan coats as good as new. Most anybody can give 'em enough black goods for strips, an' Zebedora 's old enough to look after 'em all. She 's done that long enough a'ready, goodness knows, — pore child ! "

The Dayton had rattled in at Mrs. Posey's gate, and that lady helped her guests to alight.

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Ill

The Aaron Posey farm was some four miles out the pike from the church on the hill. Aaron Posey was a kindly, selfeffacing soul with a masterful wife, whose grievance it was that she lived just far enough from Pocahontas to be one of the last to hear any news. There were no children at the Aaron Poseys’, but Mrs. Aaron mothered her husband, and Mr. Posey raised little white pigs which he sold for high prices, and very large white pigs which took all the prizes at the county fairs of Belair and Timonium and Plagerstown. Mrs. Posey was not to be outdone by Aaron ; she was noted for making the best beaten biscuit and peach marmalade and cherry bounce in Pocahontas ; and i7 it is something to be supreme in one’s own sphere, however circumscribed it may be.

Aaron’s cousin Willy — Mr. Willy, he was generally called, perhaps out of deference to some innate dignity — was the Rural Delivery letter-carrier, and it describes his character to say that his two dearest friends were Zebedee V. Slocum and his cousin Aaron’s wife, the embodiments of romance and of common sense. The greatest joys of his life were to listen to Zebedee V. and talk to Mrs. Aaron. He was a plump, rosy-cheeked little man, with a round face that was smoothshaven on Wednesdays and Sundays. His movements were quick and rather fussy. His point of view wavered between an inclination towards prudishness and a zest for the unusual. He was painfully shy with most women, and would have given a year of his life to be known 18 as a beau for one short day. He kept his own house far more neatly than did many of his feminine neighbors, and had never found his bachelor existence lonely or irksome.

The Aaron Posey farm was the last stopping-place on his route, and he would rattle up to the side porch in his old Dayton wagon, hop over the wheel, and fussily tie his sedate white mare, Alexander, as securely as if she had been a two-year-old thoroughbred, and then trip up to the veranda or into the sitting-room, bristling with all the latest news of Pocahontas.

A month or two after the funeral of the second Mrs. Zebedee V., he said to Mrs. Aaron one afternoon,

“ I tell you what it is, Cousin Annie Lee, I ain't got much respec’ for anybody ’t pays taxes towards Rural Delivery and nen goes to the store for his mail. That ’s what I call sheer wastefulness.”

Mrs. Posey was sprinkling down the clothes, and looked up at him over the black rims of her spectacles. “ What ’s in that to make you so riled, Cousin Willy? ” she asked.

“ Well, I jest tell you what ’t is, Cousin Annie Lee; I ain’t got a minute to spare to read any postmarks, nor postals neither, and I never was one of the kind to peer into other folks’s business. People cert’n’y is suspicious in this world. Here only the other day I took a letter to Zebedee V. Slocum from Plumtree, Indiana, and said somethin’ pleasant like about it havin’ come far enough to get tired, and Zebedee V. looked like he thought I ’s wantin’ to know what ’s inside of it ; and now he goes to the store every day himself. Yes ’m.”

Mrs. Aaron Posey looked interested; she asked the postman to be seated, took off her spectacles, and made herself comfortable in her favorite rocker.

“ Well! I declare ! ” she said. “ Now what do you s’ppose he ’s gettin’ letters from there for ? Where ’d you say it was ? ”

“ Plumtree, Indiana/’ replied Mr. Willy. “ Little Hanse Brown ’s clerkin’ at the store now, and he says Zebedee V. gets a letter from there every two or three times a week.”

Mrs. Aaron and Mr. Willy looked at each other intently for a minute. Then Mrs. Aaron said :

“ I ’d jest like to know what Zebedee V. Slocum ’s up to now.”

“ Yes ’m,” said Mr. Willy, “ I reckon it ’s somethin’ out o’ the common.”

He had no explanation to offer, how- 21 ever, and it was not until several weeks later that he brought further news with the mail. As he hopped from his wagon he called out his usual cheery greeting.

“ Why, good evenin’, Cousin Annie Lee. Nice ba’my day, ain’t it? ”

“ I never pay much ’tendon to the weather,” replied Mrs. Posey. “ Weather ’s bound to happen anyways, and I never could see ’t forecastin’ it and prayin’ for it does a mite o’ good, exceptin’ to them as makes a livin’ by so doin’.”

“ Well ’m, maybe that ’s so. But it cert’n’y is gettin’ real springy.”

“ Spring gen’lly follers winter,” affirmed Mrs. Aaron. “ I prefer the fall o’ the year, myself, though that ’s a matter of choice.”

“ Yes, ma’am, that it is, and they ’s 22 right smart of folks like the spring best. I ’m kinder partial to it myself. Kinder sorter makes you feel like movin’ and keepin’ still all at oncet. Zebedee V. says springtime ’s made for buildin’ nests and lovin’ — ‘ In the spring a young man’s

fancy begins to think of makin’ love ’ — or somethin’ like that.”

Mrs. Posey sat up straight in her chair. “ You don’t mean to tell me,” she said, “ that Zebedee V. Slocum ’s thinkin’ of gettin’ married again this quick? ”

“ Mr. Willy smiled, and rubbed his chin. “ Looks that-a-way,” he said.

“ So that ’s what all those letters are for up to — what ’s the name of the place?”

“ Plumtree, Indiana. Yes ’m.”

“ Now who on earth does Zebedee V. Slocum know out there ? ”

“ Well ’m, he ’s tellin’ us about her last night at the store. A package come ’t he thought must be her pixture, but it was jest some souvenir postals with views on ’em. She wrote ’t she was too bashful to set for her pixture, and she ’d ruther wait anyhow tell he sees her, so ’s he won’t form any wrong impression. Yes ’m. Zebedee V. says that ’s the kind for him. Says he married for wealth oncet and a worker oncet, and now he wants to wed a true woman, timid and gentle, ’at wants a manly champion to stand between her and the world, the kind ’at needs love and pertection to flourish like a flower.”

Mrs. Posey remarked: “ That sounds like Zebedee V. Slocum. D’s he expect to find all of that? ”

“ Yes ’m, so he says. That ’s the kind he mentioned in his adver ferment.”

“ Cousin Willy! You don’t mean to 24 tell me ’t that man actshally advertised for a wife? ”

“ Yes ’m. Little Hanse says he reckons ef many people he’abouts did that, ’t this post-office ’d soon raise out of the fo’thclass list. I noticed Zebedee V. ’s hangin’ aroun’ the store right smart, but I never suspicioned he ’s gettin’ his own letters, not tell jest when I told you about it. I jest thought he ’s lonesome like, without pore Milly, an’ seekin’ company. Yes ’m.”

“ Well, I must say I think that ’s a disgrace to the community. To advertise for a wife, with plenty of unmarried ladies right here in Pocahontas ! Not that any one of ’em would have Zebedee V. Slocum, not ef he ’s to ask ’em on bended knee. But to advertise in the papers ! ”

“ Yes ’m,” said the postman, “ that ’s a right expensive way, it cert’n’y is. I reckon it was n’t what you might call a real necessity, things bein’ as they are.”

“ Hum,” said Mrs. Aaron; then, “ Did he say much about her, Cousin Willy?” she asked.

“ He says she used to teach school, and late years she ’s been nursin’ a aged relative tell he died.”

“ I reckon the aged relative left her well off, or Zebedee V. Slocum ’d never be makin’ up to her.”

“ Well ’m, he says he wants to marry his ideal woman oncet in his life, and he cain’t find her he’abouts.”

Mrs. Posey sniffed. “ Zebedee V. Slocum’s ideals are mighty apt to have silver linin’s,” she said, as she closed the door after Mr. Willy.

IV

The most interesting news of all was brought by the carrier one afternoon in early midsummer.

“ Why, good evening Cousin Annie Lee/' he called out as he was tying his horse. “ You ’d jest oughter been to the store day befo’ yest’day. I tell you what, that ’s the greatest thing I ever see.” He sat down and began fanning and rocking. Mrs. Aaron Posey waited a few seconds, then said impatiently:

“ What happened? ”

“ Well ’m,” said Mr. Willy, with a reminiscent chuckle, “ you ’d oughter been there, that ’s all. You know ’m, we all went down to see Zebedee V. off, ’cause he was goin’ to Balt’mer to meet his bride 27 from Plumtree, Indiana. They was to get married in Balt’mer an’ nen come on home. Zebedee V., he got kinder warmed up by the occasion, and talked right smart about her. Said her name was Flora, and that she cert’n’y must be mighty fond of a man to come all that way to meet him. Said he could jest pixture her in his mind’s eye, gettin’ into a big city like Balt’mer all tired out and skeered, and a wonderin’ whether he ’d meet her or not. Said sometimes his heart misgave him for uprootin’ sech a tender flower and transplantin’ her into a strange neighborhood. He said he reckoned it would n’t be a safe thing for everybody to do, but it was jest in such cases that experience tells, and he ’d oughter be able to manage any woman, livin’ or dead. Unc’ Lewis Cary up and ast him if he ’d told her he ’s married twicet befo’; and he said natchelly, 28 that he was n’t the man to deceive a young and trustin’ female. Cousin Julius Todd wanted to know what she said to eight child’en, and Zebedee V. said he reckoned she did n’t rightly take in they ’s eight of ’em. He said he mentioned his motherless little ones, and she said she guessed she could stand ’em. Zebedee V. said he reckoned she was n’t much bigger ’n his eldest, and they ’d ! all be like playful child’en together. Well ’m, whilst he ’s showin’ us the marriage license and talkin’ about matrimony bein’ the gate to heaven, a whistle blowed. We all thought it was the down train; so we went out onto the platform with Zebedee V. But it was n’t his train; it was the train from Balt’mer. And who do you think got off?”

“ Flora,” said Mrs. Posey.

“ Yes ’m, that ’s jest exactly who did.

But they was n't ary one of us guessed it first sight. No indeedy ! They was n't even a warnin' flutter inside o' Zebedee V. ! " Mr. Willy smiled reminiscently. He paused and rocked, smacking the palms of his hands on the arms of the chair, and chuckling in a way no woman could be expected to endure.

“ For the land's sakes, go on," exclaimed Mrs. Posey, impatiently. “What'd she look like? What 'd she have on? "

“ Well 'm, Zebedee V.'s anticipations had n’t pixtured her very correctly. She looks like she 's some oldern 'n he is, and she 's consider'ble taller. I reckon handsome is as handsome does; but her hair is jest about the color of a clay road in the springtime, and she 's got a kinder impediment in one of her eyes. It jest stands still like, when it rests on you ; and it gives you a mighty oneasy feeling I can tell you ! Makes you feel like turnin’ round real quick to find out what she ’s lookin’ at behind yo’ head. They ain’t nothin’ slow nor easy-goin’ about Flora, as I could see ; but she looks like she might be real kind when she ain’t crossed. I reckon she gen’lly has her own way.”

“ What ’d she do? ” asked Mrs. Aaron.

“Well ’m,” said Mr. Willy, “maybe you won’t believe it, but what I ’m tellin’ is a fact. Jest as soon as ever her foot lit on the platform of Pocahontas, a breeze sprung up! Yes, ma’am, that’s what it did ! And from then on things went right lively for an hour. It took the conductor and the brakeman both to help her off with her belongings; she had two baskets and two valises and a telescope, and a hat box and some little bundles, all in the car with her, not to mention a poll-parrot in a cage;

and she had two trunks in the baggage car. She got ’em all piled up on the platform, and in less time ’n you could wink at she ’s cornin’ a-huntin’ for Zebedee V. Slocum. Z. V. cert’n’y did miss his guess about her; Flora ain’t of a retirin’ disposition. She come right along askin’ for him.” Mr. Willy paused for breath and effect.

“ Served him right,” said Mrs. Aaron.

“ Yes ’m. Well ’m, ’pon my soul and body, I could n’t tell what happened first. She found Zebedee V., and she found the license, and she found the minister, and she married Zebedee V. right then and there. I don’t remember hearin’ him say one solitary word, but I reckon he must ’a’ spoke durin’ the ceremony; ’cause she married him all right. Trust Flora to see to that! She had her things piled in my Dayton, and me a-drivin’ her and Zebe- 32 dee V. off home, ’fore I as much as come to.”

“ Oh, you drove ’em home, did you? ” asked Mrs. Posey, leaning forward in her chair, her eyes sparkling with enjoyment.

“ Yes ’m, that I did,” said the postman, “ though how I come to do it is more ’n I can tell you. First thing I knew there we were, me and the trunks and the poll-parrot on the front seat, and her and Zebedee V. settin’ up behind. When we got to the place, there was all the eight lined up inside the fence, lookin’ out over the spikes. It made a good deal of an effect, I can tell you ! Course Flora could n’t know that ’s jest the way they mostly spend their time. It made you think of a regiment or a lodge drawn up at a funeral or somethin’! Oh, it looked great, it did ! All ’s needed was a flag and a drum ! ”

“ What ’d she say? ” asked Mrs. Posey.

“ She looked at ’em real hard, an’ nen she said to Zebedee V., ‘ Are all o’ them yours ?’ says she. Zebedee V., he says, ‘ Yes, my love, them ’s mine and yours/ An’ nen she got down; and I must say she spoke right nice to the child’en. Zebedora seemed to take to her right off. I reckon she ’ll do right by ’em. Anyways they could n’t be much worse off ’n they have been !

“ I ’s startin’ to help Jeromy Fount-le- Roy inside with the trunks when she up and thanks me, and says she would n’t trouble me further, as ’t was her husband’s place to carry in the trunks. Zebedee V. begun to say somethin’, but I noticed her eye was n’t roamin’ none jest then, and so Zebedee V. took a holt o’ one handle and Jeromy took a holt o’ the other. But Mis’ Slocum, she said, ‘ You put that down, 34

Jeromy. Yo’ Pa ’s jest give you to me, and I ain’t a-goin’ to let no child o’ mine handle trunks whilst he ’s still a-growin\ That ain’t too heavy for yo’ Pa.’ Yes ’m. That ’s what she said. When I drove off, Zebedee V.’s a-totin’ her things into the house, and her and the child’en ’s watchin’ him. Them child’en cert’n’y did look s’prised like. Yes ’m.”

“ Well,” said Mrs. Aaron, with a deep breath, “ ef that don’t beat all I ever heard ! I never expected to live to see the day that Zebedee V. Slocum did any real work. Have you heard of him sence? ”

“ Have I?” quoted Mr. Willy. “Well’m, I jest reckon I have! First thing yest’day mornin’ I drove by his place, and there ’s Zebedee V. in the back yard sawin’ wood, with the child’en jest standin’ off at a distance lookin’ on, and that poll-parrot hangin’ out on the side 35 po’ch passing remarks. Then when I ’s takin’ around the mail I see him clearin’ up the yard, and the grass was all cut. Don’t look like the same place, exceptin’ for the fence and the house.

“ Last night I ’s jest startin’ from the store, and Zebedee V. come off ’n the church steps to meet me. I ast him why he did n’t come on in to the store, and he said he didn’t feel much like joinin’ in comp’ny that night. He give me a quarter, and ast me to get him a pipe and some terbacco, on the quiet like. Said he had n’t had a smoke all day, and he thought he ’d shorely die befo’ mornin’ ef he did n’t get some smoke in his lungs right soon. So I went back and bought him a pipe and some terbacco, an’ nen we set on the church steps quite a while. The smokin’ seemed to cheer him up right smart, and he told me all about his first two wives, 3b how good they was, and easy-goin’ ; and he said he knew it was n’t right to wish people back in their misery, but he cert’n’y had loved them two. Long about ten o’clock we begun to go towards his house, and he said Flora told him they ’s two things she ’d always made up her mind her husband, if she got one, should n’t do, and one was to smoke or chew, and the other was to stay out late. Zebedee V. said he reckoned he might as well humor her about the smokin’, and it made him sick to chew, anyhow; but as for stayin’ out late, he ’d have to use his own jedgment. Said they ’s always some things a man has to decide for himself, anyways, and the way to make a woman understan’ that was jest to go ahead and do ’em.”

“ And him twice a widower ! ” Mrs. Aaron remarked.

“ Yes ’m,” Mr. Willy acknowledged. 37

“ Well ’m, he ’s goin’ on tellin’ me how to manage a woman, when to give in and when to stand fast and firm, when we come to his place and started aroun’ to the side po’ch. First thing we turned the corner we both stood right stock still. Yes ’m. That’s what we did! They ’s somethin’ white up on the po’ch, dost alongside o’ the door. 1 jest whispered to him, ‘ Laws,’ I says, ‘ she ’s waitin’ for you, Z. V.,’ I says, and I started to get outen the way; but he grabbed a holt o’ my arm. ‘ Wait a minute,’ s’ys he, ‘ they ain’t ’ny hurry.’ I says, ‘ Z. V., ef I was you I ’d never go roun’ to that side po’ch. Ain’t they any other way you can get in ? ’ So he crep’ up to the front door and tried it, but it ’s locked tight. Then he tried eve’y shutter on the front of the house and down the side, and I went along to keep him comp’ny. But they ’s all shet tight, too. They was n’t anything else to do but to take the side po’ch, so we crep’ aroun’ the corner again. She had n’t budged ; and I says, ‘ Laws, Z. V., maybe she ’s asleep and you can step over her ! ’ So he took off his shoes and snooped along up, and I walked on the grass so ’s not to make any noise. And when we got up real dost, what do you suppose it was, Cousin Annie Lee? ”

"How sh’d I know?” exclaimed Mrs. Aaron, impatiently.

“ Well, ma’am,” said Mr. Willy, impressively, “ it jest beat anything I ever see in all my life ! It was n’t a single, solitary soul! No ’m, not one livin’ soul! I tell you what, I reckon Flora ’ll be the one to stand fast and firm in that f am’ly ! Cousin Annie Lee, there was a sheet folded in half and laid out on the floor o’ the po’ch right in front o’ the door, and a 39 piller at one end of it, and a blanket turned down. Yes ’m, that ’s what it was! And that door was locked tight, too.”

Mr. Willy looked at his cousin intently for a moment, as if trying to convey the full meaning of his words. Mrs. Aaron’s tightly closed lips had taken on their humorous downward twist. Then Mr. Willy went on. “ I never see anything equal to the sight of Zebedee V. a-standin’ there in his stockin’ feet, with his shoes in his hand, a-lookin’ at that bed laid out on the floor of the po’ch. He said he cert’n’y hadn’t looked forward to spendin’ none of his honeymoon a-takin’ the fresh-air cure. I felt so bad for him, I told him I reckoned I better be goin’. Yes ’m.”

Mrs. Aaron Posey settled back in her rocker, and it was several minutes before she spoke. Then, “ I ’m goin’ to call on that woman to-morrer,” she said.

V

Mrs. Aaron was not the only one who went to call on the new Mrs. Zebedee V. The wedding was the talk of Pocahontas for weeks, and everyone was anxious to meet the bride. Her first appearance at church — and she did not go until she had made suitable clothes for all the eight — was the greatest sensation in years. Zebedee V. was not a church member; his children had been brought up, as Mrs. Aaron always declared, “ jest any which a way ” ; but it was evident that a new regime had begun for the little Slocums as well as for their father. It was a proud day for Flora, and a prouder one for Pocahontas and the Methodist minister, when ten Slocums marched into church, 4i clad in new raiment, eight of them looking a little frightened, one sulky, and one triumphant.

Mrs. Aaron's friendship for the newcomer had ripened rapidly, and her sisters had been pleased to follow her example. Mrs. Sissy, indeed, made the most of their distant relationship, and helped with the sewing. Miss Julia Higgins, as a person of elegant leisure compared to the married women, had gone to Baltimore with Flora's shopping list; even Mrs. Aaron helped, by taking the two youngest boys home with her to get them out of Flora's way; and after a week Zebedora came too.