The daughter at school

Front matter

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Chapter I

EDUCATION THE FIRST THING. INTRODUCTORY.

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A New Attempt. Indefatigable Student. Embryo of Im mortality. Learning to see. How the Little Child learns. Labor makes beautiful. A Great "Work. Will subdued. The World of Fancy. Where is the Attention? The Wild Colt. Napoleon's Memory. Somewhere and Somebody Investigate and reason. Garden of Life. For Eternity. Better than Wealth. The Polished Jewel. ... 1

Chapter II. The School-girl Away From Home

Home Education. The Opening Flower. Parents unfit Teachers. Private Instruction. All need a Standard. Influence of Nunneries. Teaching a Profession. It is a Trial. On a larger Scale. A Pleasant Plan. Clothes and Shoes. Longing to turn back. Weather changed. Counting the Weeks. A Critical Point. Character developing.

VI CONTENTS.

Best of every Thing. Back-bone Work. An Angel's Wing drooping 18

Chapter III. The School-girl At Study

The Great Trial. Trunks full. Nothing forgotten. A Vacant Stare. Two Thirds lost. Memory wanting. Xenophon's Retreat. All need Judgment. Learn to discriminate. Best Taste in Town. Select the Best. Knowledge raiining away. Loose Change. Where to look. Society of a Lapdog. Not a Short Job. Iron-hearted Bell. Habit of Toil 36

Chapter IV. How To Study

Witch Stories. The Question proposed. Study dry Work. Look it out again. Bishop Jewel's Memory. Conquer, step by step. A High Standard. A Finished Yoimg Lady. Capacity wanted. Chain the Attention. Author of this Mischief. Dr. Gregory. Ship obeying the Hehn. Algebra forgotten. Waters filtered. Cambridge and Oxford. Taste cultivated. Duty become Pleasure. . . . . . .52

Chapter V. Social Duties Of The School-girl

Power of Oratory. Constant Impression. Almost a Nun. Poor Relations forgotten. Small Coin of Life. Professor

CONTENTS. Vll

Francke's Advice. Crows' Nests. A Beautiful Comparison. The always Miserable. Mirth and Cheerfulness. What you will desire to recall. Severest Punishment. Out of our own Shadow. School-girls not Matrons. One Burden lightened. Desperate Intimacies. Carry Sunshine with you. Not afraid of Responsibility. . . 70

Chapter VI. Teials And Temptations

New Trials. Better Scholars than you. Friends will be disappointed. Wonderful Blacksmith. No Excuse for you. Kock Slates and Sea-egg Pencils. Not too late. So much, done. Parents' Mistake. A Good-for-nothing Machine. Too great a Difference. The Best Kesponse. Letters like Chimneys. Starving Pupil. Genteel Prisons. Why not spend Money ? School not for the Rich alone. Daniel Webster's Congratulation. East Winds must come. Coward won the Day. 86

Chapter VII. Reading

The Tedious Day. How to read. Now is the Time to begin. Nothing to build with. One Dish at a Time. Great Men raised up in Times of Commotion. One hundred and twenty-four Volumes. A Book read in Six Months. Books of Pewter and of Bank-notes. Staiwing on Jellies. Changing Horses at Paris. Convent in Portugal. Chain of Memory. Thi-ee Hours a Week. Let Nothing interfere. Po-

Mil CONTENTS.

etry its own Reward. None, safest. Giant cracking Nuts. Phosphorus and Honey 104

Chapter VIII. Use Of The Pen

How to preserve Thought. Fresh as ever. Not a Little Undertaking. Composition dreaded. Watered by Tears. Theory mistaken. No Time for NeAvspapers. Factories near the Waterfall. Whitefield's Pathos. Passion-flower. Women must do the Letter-writing. Chain kept bright. How Letters are treated in Turkey. Graceful Handwriting. First Specimen. Learn to bear the Yoke of Discipline. Graces of Time run into Glories of Eternity. Economist of Time. Thousand Years before Noah. Arrow ruined. Life hurried. 121

Chapter IX. Formation Of Habits

Indian Fashions. Dr. Chalmers's Handwriting. John Foster's Regret. Habit of Seeing. Audubon's Bet. Lady Mary Wortley Montagu a Physician. Not ashamed to ask a Question. Secret of Despatch. Chinese Student. Always waiting. Reproof warded off. Just slipping on her Things. Lord Brougham's Rules. Mr. Condar's Speech. A Sure Recipe. Strive to please. Never-failing Beauty. Haydn's Gladness. Feast of Joy. Fair Weather will come. Passion disgusting in Woman. Rejoicing in God 140

CONTENTS. IX

Chapter X. Health At School

Conveniences of our Day. All under Law. Abuses among Good Men. Dr. Payson's Letter. Good Advice. The Two Extremes. John Howard's Testimony. His Experience in full. Too much Care. The Conscientious Self-destroyer. Kecovery, — a Curious Case. Hints not Eules. Sleep, how much needed. Sir William Jones. A Curious Will. Importance of Habits. Mother's Cupboard. The Young Lady's Self-control. Exercise indispensable. Dr. Franklin's Experience. Mind corresponds with the Body. Cheerfulness essential to Health 162

Chapter XI. The Bible

No Excuse for us. Bible worn on the Neck. Eusebius's Testimony. Bible committed to Memory. Primitive Custom. Cool Water from the Spring. " Let us begin again." The Embarrassed Merchant. The Bible Hawker. Fifty Centimes. Garden of the Lord. Commit it accurately. Eight Thousand Verses a Year. Do not omit a Day. Bible in the Trunk. Ice broken. Not a Bad Idea. Sixteen Bible Clerks. Chinaman's Experience. Bible in Yucatan. Concordance a Help. Let your Faith be strong. A Lamp to the Feet. Suited to every Thing. . . .181

X CONTENTS.

Chapter XII. The True Position Of Woman

The iEolian Harp. Golden Links in the Chain of Life. Rough Diamond polished. Her True Position. They make ns. New Stars. Man cannot do it. Her Perfect Love. Gray's Filial Love. Home-loving Queen. Where Aristocracy begins. Light of the Household. To save rather than earn. Real Friendship. A Great Mistake. The Noble Woman. Another Woman's Heart. The Pleasant Surprise. Soft Star of Love. Honor to Old Age. Peculiar Protection. Rights of Women. Five Sisters. A Little " Laming." Mrs. Kennicott. Woman appreciated. . 203

CHAPTEE XIII.

THE DAUGHTER AT HOME.

Pleasant Anticipations. " The Last." Joy awaiting you. Responsibility before you. Minute by Minute. Poor Housekeeping. Knowledge useless. No Regular Time for Study. A Part of your Discipline. " Twitting upon Facts." Help your Mother. Household Duties. Apologize for Nothing. Sit still but an Hour. Afternoon Occupations. Franklin's Courtesy. Form a Library. Busy and Quiet. Mazes of Fractions. Never-failing Cheerfulness. Service to your Father. Home Field first. Woman's Way opened. Joy in the Evening. Chariot-Wheels dragging. Melody of Heaven. A Rod or a Crown. Uses of Sorrow. Ready to work. Life's Harvest. . . . 228

THE

DAUGHTER AT SCHOOL

Chapter I

EDUCATION THE FIRST THING. INTRODUCTORY.

A New Attempt. Indefatigable Student. Embryo of Immortality. Learning to see. How the Little Child learns. Labor makes beautiful. A Great Work. Will subdued. The World of Fancy. Where is the Attention 1 The Wild Colt. Napoleon's Memory. Somewhere and Somebody. Investigate and reason. Garden of Life. For Eternity. Better than Wealth. The Polished Jewel.

I am about to try to do what, as far as I know, no one has ever yet attempted; — I am now to undertake the preparation of a book for the sole benefit of the school-girl. I am intending, as far as possible, to have two characters. I mean, I wish to throw myself into her situation, to feel her trials and wants, and at the same time, so to remain myself that I may drop hints and bestow advice that may be useful to her.

A few years since, and you were all little 1

Z INDEFATIGABLE STUDENT.

children. Your education began when you first opened the eye and noticed the light, when you first bent the ear and distinguished sounds, when you first put forth the hand and brought it in contact with something else. The first two years of life, though the impressions and the feelings and emotions excited are all now forgotten, were, perhaps, the most important of any two years that you have lived. You were then an indefatigable student, — learning size and distances, forms and colors, sound and tones, the different taste of food and drinks, the geography of your home, the tones of the human voice and the variations of the human countenance. Then you first learned the difference between the smile and the frown, the bitter and the sweet, the cold and the hot, the distant and the near, the hard and the soft, the great and the small, the sweet tone and the harsh, the feeling of pleasure and of pain. Then the emotions of joy or of grief were easily aroused and quickly passed away ; — then hope and fear followed each other in quick succession. Then you began to compare, to judge, to discriminate, and to remember. Then you first learned

EMBRYO OF IMMORTALITY. 3

that a pictoe would recall an object before seen, and even that it might be recalled by the mysterious power of the memory. Then the powers of the mind, feeble indeed, began to unfold themselves, and the germ of an immortal nature began to be developed. No hand, no voice, no care, and no love, but that of one being, were fitted to begin the education of such a being. Need I say whose ? No voice thrilled upon the little heart, no hand felt so soft to the silken head, no look beamed so bright, no love watched with such vigilance and such sleepless care, as that of the Mother ! To her care and watch and love was committed the first training of that mind whose thoughts were to be deathless, and the first forming of that character which was to grow for ever. The nursing of a planet, a moon, or a sun, which will shine a few ages of time and then go out, would be of less consequence than the training of such a mind. If the mother cannot do battle with the elements without, and if she cannot mingle with the strifes and struggles of business and take her place and crowd her way with the eager mul-

4 LEARNING TO SEE.

titude who carry on the concerns of the world, she has a higher and a holier duty to perform. She has committed to her the embryo of immortality, and the little feet which she first teaches to walk are receiving a direction from her which will never change.

Now what is the object which we have in educating a daughter ? It is very plain that we wish to teach her to use her eyes. We point her to the window. We turn her face to the candle. We show her bright colors. Then we teach her to use the ear. We call her in different tones of voice. We make musical sounds. We cheer her with notes of cheerfulness, and we quiet her with the soft tones of music. Next we educate her to use her hands. We put things into them. We close the hand and teach her to hold fast. We teach her to move the hand, to shake the rattle, and to expect that the next shake will make the same noise. Then we teach her to use the feet, to poise her weight on them, and then on one foot while she carefully takes up and moves the other : to balance herself and to move where she will. Then we instruct

HOW THE LITTLE CHILD LEARNS. O

her in the art of making sounds, uttering words, and forming sentences. Then we teach her to make known her wants, to express her emotions, to utter her notes of joy or of sorrow, to understand human language and to receive and communicate human thoughts.

All this process of education takes place before the child is two years old. And a very great work it is to do it; but God has insured its being done in three ways : first, it gives the child such pleasure to learn and to do these things that she strives continually to improve herself ; secondly, we love to see the little one in its artless attempt to imitate, so that it is a pleasure to instruct and aid it ; and thirdly, that inexpressible love of which 1 have already spoken, which makes the mother forget herself and her fatigues, in the pleasure of instructing and drawing out the soul of her child.

Now the process of education has begun. And God has so ordered, in his wisdom, that all that is valuable shall cost in proportion to its value. If we want a beauti-

LABOR MAKES BEAUTIFUL.

ful tree for shade, or to produce us fruit, we must plant the seed, defend the germ, train the shrub, watch over the little thing till it grows into strength and beauty. "We mayhave beautiful stones to sparkle and flash before the eye, but they must first be dug from the earth, then polished with immense care, and finally set with skill. Even then they are hideous, unless they adorn the person of the virtuous. We may take a pound of steel which is worth a few cents, and bestow labor and skill upon it, till it is made into springs for ladies' watches, and that one pound of steel is then worth forty thousand dollars ! We may throw out the stones of a quarry, and they are almost worthless ; but labor and skill lay them up into the walls of a palace, and ages hence they are admired and in use ; and in the hands of the wonder-working artist, the rough block of marble becomes the beautiful statue. We take the hardest and the most gnarled trees that grow, and they become, under labor and skill, the beautiful ship that passes like a bird from continent to continent. The most beautiful rose that now adorns the

A GREAT WORK.

window or the garden was once the single wild-rose, possessing hardly any thing like beauty or fragrance. Cultivation has done all the rest ; and many of our most nutritious vegetables were, in their wild state, both unsavory and poisonous.

It is not surprising, then, that, in the arrangements of God's providence, it is a great, as well as an important work, to educate one human being, — to train its body and its spirit so that it will eventually be and do all for which it is created. It is a great work, for ten thousand right impressions are to be made and fastened on the soul ; ten thousand wrong impressions are to be counteracted and effaced. As years roll onward and the child grows, the work of education becomes more and more difficult. There must be the work of many years ere the child is in any measure fitted to take care of itself, and to be intrusted with its own interests. Slowly and carefully must the foundations of character be laid, and while many would think that the great anxiety of the parent would now be, How shall I feed and clothe and shelter my little daugh-

8 WILL SUBDUED.

ter ? there is a much heavier question weighing upon him, and that is, What manner of child shall this be ?

It is very plain that one of the first things is to teach the child self-discipline, and to yield up his will and his wisdom to that of another. This is called obedience. It should be prompt, unreserved, and cheerful. The happiness of the child depends on this. And the child that has not been taught to obey at once, with alacrity, and with cheerfulness, little knows what it is to be happy. That contest between the will of the child and the will of the parent, which is often so mortifying to the parent, is utterly incompatible with happiness. The same remark is true of your instructor who is in the place of the parent. Whenever your will comes in contact with his, and you yield only outward obedience and outward submission, you are very unhappy. The will, like a wild animal, must submit or conquer very quickly. A state of contest is a state of wretchedness.

One of the first things, then, in education, is to learn cheerfully to submit your will to

THE WORLD OF FANCY. 9

that of another. And God has appointed your parents to this high trust. They may delegate their authority to others for a time, as they do in relation to the teacher of their child. But a great trust is theirs. An educated mind, then, has learned to submit to law, to order, and to such regulations at home, in the school, or in the state, as are for the best good of the community.

But now we come to the mind, — how is that to be trained? The little child lives in an ideal world. The boy has horses and cattle, menageries and armies, ships and rail-cars, all made of his little pile of blocks. And the little girl has her dolls, her visitors, her parties, and her housekeeping all in her little play-house. They make visits and long journeys, receive and entertain an abundance of company, and all without going out of the room. Fancy is uncurbed and unchecked. But now we begin to take that curious thing called the mind, to train it. The first thing is to teach it to give attention. At first this is a very difficult task. The little creature looks at the letters or on the page of the book, draws the

10 WHERE IS THE ATTENTION ?

breath, sighs, and by the answer to the question shows that the mind and the thoughts are not there. So it is even when she becomes a school-girl. She finds that it is hard to keep the mind on the book or the lesson. It will wander, — it will go home, it will visit the play-house, or it will dream of something else. Again and again she begins to read over the lesson. " Oh ! " says she, " what hard lessons ! Did any body ever have such hard lessons ? " The difficulty is not in the lesson, but in her not commanding her attention. Let a story, quite as long as the lesson, be told her, and she will give it the closest attention. And she can repeat it at once. But her lesson, she says, she has read over fifty times, and cannot get it. The reason is, that she has not learned to command her attention, and to make the mind obey her. This is what the teacher wants to accomplish; and there is no way to do this but by continual effort, lesson after lesson, trial after trial. The mind is like a wild colt at first ; and this study is like the halter put on the colt. He pulls and chafes and worries at first ; but

THE WILD COLT. 11

every time he is haltered, he chafes less and less, till finally you may lead him where you will, and do with him as you please. You must never wait to be in a mood for study, any more than you would wait for a horse to be in a mood to go. To be educated, implies that you can take the mind and put it down to hard thinking, and hold the mind there as long as you please. This is what we mean by being able to command your attention.

The next step is to cultivate the memory ', — so that you can remember faces, voices, conversations, events, facts that have taken place, and be able to recall them at any moment you wish. Some have what we call a strong memory. They seem to take hold of any thing and hold it as if the memory had steel hooks. Others can hardly retain any thing. The sieve lets every thing run through it. Perhaps no faculty can be more improved by training than the memory. A Roman once had his memory so cultivated, that he could attend an auction all day, and at night tell every article that was sold, the order in which it was sold, the person who purchased it,

12 napoleon's memory.

and the price which he paid. Few have a memory like that. But if Alexander could call every one of his soldiers by name, if Napoleon could remember where every part of his vast armies was, and the prices of every thing through his empire, so that he knew at a glance when he was charged too much, we cannot doubt but the memory can be vastly improved by cultivation. My own impression is, that much more attention ought to be paid to the improvement of the memory than is paid, both at home and in our schools. This is not the place to tell how to do this. I will here only remark, that to cultivate the memory it is absolutely necessary to be perfectly accurate. You are not to remember that such a place is about so far off, or such an event took place about such a time, or that such a thing was once done somewhere and by somebody ; but you are to be perfectly accurate, as to the event, the time, the place, the actor. All other training is very bad for the memory. And this faculty comes under the work of education.

Then, after you have learned how to attend,

INVESTIGATE AND REASON. 13

and to remember, that is, recall accurately what you know, you are next to be taught how to reason, how to think. The reason makes comparisons between one thing and another. You go to select a book, or a new dress, and you have to ask and answer many questions. Is this the precise book that I am seeking? Is it the right edition ? Is the price such that my purse can pay for it ? Is this the right time to buy it ? Ought I to do without it ? Is the quality, the color, the style, of this dress such as is suitable to my age and position? Is it within my means ? Do I need it now, and will my parents approve of it ? This is reasoning. And the judgment is what decides the answers. But these are small operations of the mind, and we wish to educate the mind and the understanding so that you can grapple with more difficult questions ; and so we place before the mind, not the colors of a dress, but the numbers in the Arithmetic, the problems in Algebra, and the demonstrations in Euclid. You are not educated till you have learned to reason in regard to any and all subjects, and have an understanding

14 GARDEN OF LIFE.

that will quickly and properly decide every question. You must be able to investigate, and this requires memory and judgment, and you must be constantly coming to decisions of the judgment. Otherwise you could never distinguish between such characters as Washington and Benedict Arnold. But we wish your mind to be, not only a thing that can think and investigate, but that can also enjoy. For this purpose we must cultivate your taste, so that instantly you see, or rather feel, what is in good taste and what is bad. So that in the wide garden of life you may be able to distinguish between flowers and weeds, and to cultivate only such flowers as are fragrant and beautiful. She who can discover what is beautiful in history, in eloquence, in poetry, in music or in painting, has received a rare gift from education. For this purpose, among others, you are instructed in composition, in rhetoric, in the reading of poetry, and the criticism of writers who are immortal.

In a school or college the amount of knowledge which is stored away in the mind is not

FOR ETERNITY. 15

much, nor of any great value. It is not the design to see how much knowledge you can lay up, but to see how perfectly we can make your mind an instrument able to instruct and guide itself. We barely begin the work of education while you are at school. Education is to continue, we believe, for ever.

Then there are other things to be attended to, such as your manners, habits, conversation, which we shall speak upon hereafter. But in speaking of what we wish to accomplish by your education, we must not forget to say, or to impress it upon you, that we educate the soul for eternity ; that we feel that we are far out of the way, and have too narrow views, when we think of you as creatures of earth. We wish your manners to be polished, your conversation pure and instructive, your countenance lighted up with intelligence, and your mind bright and awake ; but we desire more. We want the heart trained to commune with God, and the soul to rise up into his light, and to plume her wings for the flight of eternal ages. A right education embraces that humility which a conscious sin-

16 BETTER THAN WEALTH.

ner ought to feel, that self-denial which the Christian spirit ever carries with it, that cheerfulness which Christian hope creates and cherishes, and that adoration and love of God which the opening prospects of eternity inspire. The great questions with the parent and the teacher who feels rightly will be, not, Will this daughter be beautiful, be admired, be prosperous in this world, be long-lived in time ? but, "Will she be so educated as to make the most of all her powers and faculties both here and hereafter? Will she understand that the mind is as much loftier than the body, that knowledge is as much better than wealth, as the heavens are superior to earth ?

The only beings on earth worthy of being educated are our sons and our daughters. A horse may be educated in a few weeks. So can a dog or an ox. But it requires years of incessant care and anxiety and labor, to unfold and improve the faculties of one child. But when the work is done, when that child is truly and properly educated, you have a jewel polished which will outlive and outshine the sun. We are training up an angel

THE POLISHED JEWEL. 17

for eternity. And if the parent or the child thinks that a few months' schooling, or a superficial manner of instruction, or the putting on the outside polish of a few ornamental studies, is to educate that mind, they are to be pitied for their ignorance. The foundations of an education that is worthy of the name must be laid very slowly, very carefully, and very thoroughly. You may make fashionseekers and fashion-finders wdthout this, but you cannot make an educated, cultivated woman, fitted to adorn her home, to elevate society, stamp her character on others, leave the world better than she found it, and one whom Jesus Christ will own as his mother or his sister. To educate or to be educated, even for one daughter, is a work that requires all that is good and wise and great to assist in accomplishing what is so mighty in results.

Chapter II. The School-giel Away From Home

Home Education. The Opening Flower. Parents unfit Teachers. Private Instruction. All need a Standard. Influence of Nunneries. Teaching a Profession. It is a Trial. On a larger Scale. A Pleasant Plan. Clothes and Shoes. Longing to turn back. Weather changed. Counting the Weeks. A Critical Point. Character developing. Best of every Thing. Back-bone Work. An Angel's Wing drooping.

The child is committed by its Maker to its parents for training. In ordinary cases, this is a sacred and a delightful trust. For the first few years of its life, no parent thinks of putting his child out from under the influences and the care of home. And, were there not most weighty reasons, surely the child would never be sent away from home till he went out to a home of his own, and the daughter whose mind and heart just begin to expand

HOME EDUCATION. 19

would not be put into the hands of strangers to form her character, were there not some very special inducements. The argument for a home education is a very strong one. At home, we are told, there must be order and government, but it is all done through the affections. The sternness of law is not felt. The affections are so warm, that it is not felt to be obedience to obey. But in the large school it is all one unbending system of rules and regulations, cold and stern, without any play of the affections. At home, each child can be instructed according to its temperament and capacity, without coming under the regimen adopted for a great number. Plans of study, of recreation, and the like, are there adapted to the habits and the temperament of each, without overlooking any peculiarity, physical or mental. At home, there is no rivalry which urges on to efforts beyond the strength, or which creates envy and jealousy in the heart, or which ends in disappointment. There the mental powers can be developed slowly and carefully, and the bud can have time to open under the genial sun and gentle

20 PARENTS UNFIT TEACHERS.

dews. There is no forcing like the hot-bed. And there, too, at home, under the eye of love, the purity of the child can be insured, and she is shut away from contamination, and from evil associates. There, in the shades of the sweet home, may she spend her early days, and, screened from the cold world and its vices, she can be educated, and thus be prepared, at the right time, to take her place in the world, an ornament to her sex and to her station. This is the substance of the argument for a strictly home education. And I think it has strength ; and yet very few attempt to do the thing ; and for this there must be some urgent reasons. What are they? Or rather, why is the young girl sent away among strangers, when so much is at stake, and perhaps so much is imperilled? I re-

Because but few parents are competent to educate their children themselves. Amid the cares and toils necessary to provide for a family, the parents soon forget the particulars of their own education. And, moreover, every thing is on the advance. No parent expects

PRIVATE INSTRUCTION. 21

to send the child out into the world with only the education with which the mother began. The child lives in a day when she wears richer dresses, has better books, better food, more travelling, more intercourse with society, than her mother had. Who is to instruct her at home ? The mother is incompetent, and the father probably is likewise ; or if not, he is too much occupied in business to do it. She must have private teachers, then, at home. But here are two difficulties. The first is, that few are able to pay the needful compensation for the best private teachers. It would cost many hundreds of dollars to obtain good teachers for a single family : but there is a greater difficulty, and that is, they could not b£ had. It is only by having large schools that teachers are trained up and qualified; and it is only because they here have a field so wide, that the first-rate minds can be induced to become teachers. Reduce all to home education, and you would have but few good and competent teachers. Large schools are, at any rate, necessary to raise them for their work. Parents and teachers would both