Memoir of Mrs. Elizabeth McFarland

Front matter

I UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, f i

OF

MRS. ELIZABETH McFARLAND;

Preface

11 We who have been acquainted with Mrs. McFarland more than thirty years/' said an intimate friend, " will know whether what shall be written in her Memoir is true." With this remark in view, the author commits the work, with entire confidence, to the inspection and perusal, not only of her particular friends, and those who have known her by reputation, throughout the state ; but also of distant strangers. It should, however, be added, that such was the characteristic modesty and humility of Mrs. McFarland, that her excellencies were not all visible even to the eyes of familiar acquaintances. Many things were brought to light after her death, which greatly increase our admiration of her virtues, and which were not fully known before to all the members of her own family. Indeed, the perusal of her Memoir will confirm the impression, that her self-denial, diligence and perseverance in the duties of the christian life, were far greater than her most intimate friends ever supposed.*

* The facts in this Memoir have been collected from every accessible source. Much use has been made of Mrs. McFarland's diary, which she commenced at about the age of 21 , and continued, with occasional intervals, nearly 27 years. Many interesting particulars have been furnished by the two eldest daughters, Mrs, McMillan of Conway, and Mrs. Buxton of Boscawen.

1"

VI PREFACE.

The main design of this Memoir is to illustrate the scriptural truth, that "full assurance of hope" in regard to one's own salvation, is the fruit and reward of faith in Jesus Christ — the atoning Saviour — combined with the diligent practice of every christian duty.

The fervent prayer of the writer is, that this Memoir, in the preparation of which he has found great comfort, amidst numerous parochial duties and deep domestic affliction, may be the means of leading the mothers and daughters of our Zion to a more entire consecration of their hearts and " ministration of their substance" to their adorable Lord — that they may copy the example of the " holy women of old," whose faith and works are recorded for their imitation — and finally, in the "full assurance of hope," triumph over the king of terrors ! Concord, March, 1839.

Chapter I

Birth, parentage and incidents in early life. Childhood — school at Medford — death of her father — " a little plan"— Watts on the mind. 12—25

Chapter II

A MORE PARTICULAR ACCOUNT OF HER RELIGIOUS EXER- CISES FROM CHILDHOOD TO THE AGE OF TWENTY- THREE. Early impressions — dangerous sickness — prayer-meeting at her mother's — profession of religion diary — accountableness to God — Christ the foundation — season of affliction — views of divine justice — self-examination — sins of the tongue — prayer. 26 — 41

Chapter III

Her marriage, and qualifications for her station. Views before marriage — prayer for a blessing on her new relation — character as a wife — domestic habits — desires to be useful — prayers for the people — social character — dress — respect for ministers of the gospel.

41—54 CHAPTER IV.

Character as a mother. Dedication of her children to God— early instruction — an example of early rising — her government and instruction — conversation with her daughters — benevolence — Sabbath exercises —

Vlll CONTENTS.

piayer with her children — correction — extracts from diary— mourns the evil propensities of her children — sickness of E. and of S. — concern for temporal support — death of a child — affecting prayer for C. 55 — 77

Chapter V

Tribute of affection to her parents and only brother. Mysterious providences — recollection of her father — her mother's ill health and death — deep mourning — her brother's death. 78 — 86

Chapter VI

Devotional character and exercises. Religion the business of her life — remark concerning distressing views of sin — extracts from her diary — family cares — a wandering sister — good resolves — hope of heaven — social prayer — particular prayer — answers to prayer — prayer for a revival — adoration and petition — preparation for the Sabbath — humbling sense of sin — conference — love to christians — why prayer is not answered — concern for a domestic — her views in sickness — revival of religion — pants after holiness— female prayer meeting — resolves at the beginning of the year — precious bible — sermon to heads of families — sweet season of devotion — joy at the foot of the cross — recovery from sickness — self forgotten, and God glorified — revival in colleges — indwelling sin lamented— birth-day — revival in Concord, 1816 — Jesus, all — absence from the communion — two young boarders — renewal of covenant — grieving the Holy Spirit — a rainy Sabbath — Sabbath school— prayer for Mrs. Rowell — great

CONTENTS. IX

peace in believing — fast day — answer to prayer — her place of devotion, " the north chamber." 87 — 134

CHAPTER Vll.

Letters written during her married life. Female prayer meeting, Boston — invitation to personal religion — doctrines — the times — death of christians — conformity to the world, millenium — children — fruits of a revival — christian warfare — death of Dea. Thomas W. Thompson — dismission of Dr. M'Farland — his death.

135—161 CHAPTER VIII.

Her interest in missionary, charitable and religious societies. ' The tree is known by its fruit' — New-Hampshire Cent Institution — Concord Female Charitable Society — Foreign Missions, &c. — gives one tenth — u a purse for God" — Concord Female Religious Society — other benevolent objects — attempts to write a tract — extract from it. 161 — 200

CHAPTER IX.

Her labors as a sabbath school teacher. Reluctance to engage— preparation of lessons— specimens : The Sabbath — blessedness of those who consider the poor — the sin of Nadab and Abihu — duties of wives and husbands. Conversation and prayer with members of her class. 201—234

CHAPTER X.

Extracts from letters written during the last seven years of her life. To Mrs. E. M., of Boston — reference bible — sailors— zeal for the salvation

X CONTENTS.

of sinners — concern for particular individuals — letters to her daughter S.— to Rev. Mr. Buxton. 235—258

CHAPTER XI.

Interesting particulars illustrative of her religious character. Her diary — views of a particular providence — religious meetings — remarks on two occasions — family worship — seasons of sickness before the last — her closet, the garret. 259 — 279

CHAPTER XII.

" Full assurance of hope" — or triumph in prospect of death. The last time she attended public worship — the Sabbath a season of comfort — christian perfection — Watts' hymns — church fast — benefit from prayers — her children visit her — " loving kindness" — bright views of the Saviour — growth in grace — adorable Trinity — government of God — prays with the watchers — fervent prayer for ministers and others ■ — charity and christian simplicity—theological students — dying grace — heaven — great joy — Christ preciouspreparatory lecture — sacrament administered to her — full assurance — great humiliation — last day — death — monumental inscription. 280 — 319

MEMOIR.

Chapter I

BIRTH, PARENTAGE. AND INCIDENTS IN EARLY LIFE.

Mrs. Elizabeth McFarland, consort of the late Rev. Asa McFarland,* D. D., of Concord, N. H., was born in Boston, March 19, 1780 ; the only daughter of Mr. Bartholomews and Mrs. Susanna Sewall Kneeland. Her grand father, Samuel Sewall, of York, Maine, was a kinsman of the late chief justice Samuel Sewall, of Massachusetts, — -a name no less distinguished for moral excellence and piety than for sound judgment and learning. She had an only brother, William, who died in the island of Jamaica, August 17, 1809.

Her father, Mr. Kneeland, was a merchant in Boston. Though not a professor of religion, he was a man of strict morals ; constant in at-

* Died 18 February, 1827, aged 57. 2 tending public worship, and family prayer by the use of an approved form. He died April 19, 1792. Her mother was the subject of religious impressions in early childhood. On Mr. Whitefield's visit at Portsmouth, she heard him preach "with great delight," 4 from the words in Jude, 21 v., " Keep yourselves in the love of God." She made a public profession of religion at about the age of 21. During her residence in Boston, Mrs. Kneeland was one of the precious band of women who meet weekly for prayer — of whom it has been said, they were ' kindred spirits with those of our own time — pioneers, on whose steps ours are pressing — who prepared the way and smoothed some of the roughnesses of the path, even of the minister and the missionary of our own day. Yes — theirs was a day of asking for what we receive, for the spread of the gospel and the advancement of the Redeemer's kingdom.'

This Society of praying women was formed after Mr. Whitefield's visit to New-England, in 1740, and is continued to the present time. Mrs. Waters, whose life has been published, was the last of the original members. " Here the wealthy, the talented, the daughters of poverty

CHILDHOOD. 15

but rich in faith, delighted to meet and pour out their requests at the throne of grace ; believing that they should receive the things they asked for — speedily, if best ; but sure, if distant returns."*

The following particulars respecting the childhood of Mrs. McFarland were furnished the compiler by her daughter, Mrs. Buxton.

" Mr. Boat on,— -You requested me to communicate what I know of my mother's early history. I have learned most of this from her own lips, and some from such of her early friends as I have been acquainted with. Her parents were fond and indulgent, yet firm and decided in their government. They had but two children, William and Eliza. She always recollected, with lively interest, the instructions and prayers of her mother. This excellent parent would often take them from their childish amusements to her place of retirement, and there plead for their salvation. A person who resided in the family states, that she took them, in their earliest infancy, to this sacred spot, and present-

* MS. by Mrs. McFarland. See, also, Memoirof Mrs. Waters, "by Rev. Mr. Huntington, of Boston.

ed them in her arms to the Friend of children, dedicating them to the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

" They were remarkably regular in all their domestic arrangements, especially in those which pertained to the keeping of the Sabbath and to public worship. They attended the Old South Church, — never going to any other from motives of curiosity or convenience. Between my mother and her brother there existed a very strong attachment. When in childhood, they attended school together, it was remarked by their teacher that when he was punished for any violation of the rules of school, she was the greatest sufferer of the two.

" She was fond of beholding the beauties of nature,-- -always preferring a prospect of the ocean, or a ride into the country, to all the various objects afforded by the shops of Boston. She was occasionally indulged with a visit to her maternal relations, who lived in the state of Maine ; and through life, even in her last illness, loved to tell of the pleasant sights she beheld during these excursions. A present from a friend, of a nosegay, or even a single rose, always filled her with pleasure. She said to me,

SCHOOL AT MEDFORD. 17

a few summers since, c I don 't know but it is because I grow childish, but the flowers seem to me more beautiful and fragrant every year.'

" She sometimes made a visit to Portsmouth, at the house of her uncle Penh allow, who married her father's sister. She always remembered the faithfulness of this excellent man. He would often come to her in the forenoon, saying, ( Have you prayed in secret to-day V If she had not, he would say, l Why not, my child?' She would sometimes tell him that her aunt was busy, and she stayed to help her. ' Oh, that will not do,' he would say, c Go right away, leave any thing and every thing, till you have attended to this duty.'

" It was the intention of her parents to provide her with the best means of education which were then afforded. She appears to have been diligent, and fond of study, though she always felt that her early school education was superficial. She regretted that so much of her time was spent in attending to needle work, though she never discountenanced the exercise of taste and ingenuity, to a moderate extent, in this branch of industry. She was sent to a boarding school at Medford, kept by Mr. Woodbridge, the father of William C. Woodbridge, who is now distinguished for his efforts to promote the cause of education. Here she remained some time, and seems to have made good progress in mental discipline and the acquisition of knowledge. When she left school her teacher gave her a present, and his thanks, for the good example she had set. Her attention was directed to instrumental music ; and though she felt that her ear w r as not sufficiently accurate for her to become a skilful performer, yet by patient attention and perseverance she made considerable proficiency. After leaving school she read with avidity such works on the improvement of the mind as were then extant. The valuable treatise by Dr. Watts fell into her hands, and she made it her endeavor to pursue the course recommended by that excellent author.

" Her mind seems always to have been susceptible of religious impressions, and her conscience to have been very tender. She recollected, through life, one direct falsehood which she told when a child, and said that it cost her many a tear.

" At the age of twelve years, she lost her father. His death was sudden, caused by dropsy

DEATH OF HER FATHER. 19

in the chest, symptoms of which appeared a few weeks before. It was in the month of April ; and she, with a young friend, had been amusing herself during the beautiful moonlight evening, sometimes sitting in a little arbor, to which they had access, anticipating an increase of their enjoyments when summer should come ; and sometimes sitting down in the family circle. Towards the close of the evening, her father prepared to retire for the night. He went up stairs, supported by his wife. On reaching the top he faltered —and in less than an hour was dead.

" This event made a deep impression upon her tender mind, and increased her concern respecting her spiritual state. She was surprised and comforted to see how her dear mother was supported through the various trying scenes occasioned by this afflictive event : exhibiting the deep humility of the chastened christian, and at the same time attending with fortitude and cheerfulness to the settlement of affairs, and then resuming the business in which they had been engaged during his life."

The manner in which she spent the youthful period of life, while her religious character was forming, may be judged of by the following paper, found among her writings. Whether ' The Little Plan' was original or not, we have not the means of knowing ; but it was adopted, by signing her name to it.

" A Little Plan — to regulate the life of a very indolent girl.

" Rise in the morning at half past five — spend the first hour in devotion — in reading some short passage of scripture, and meditating upon it. Accustom yourself to express your best thoughts on the sentences you read. This will prove a means of expanding your mind, and will assist you in conversation. Then seek earnestly to God, by prayer, for the blessings you need ; for the influences of his Spirit, to convince you of sin ; your undone condition by nature ; the infinitely evil nature of sin, and the way of salvation by Jesus Christ ; for his sanctifying, saving grace ; for the temporal blessings you need ; for health of body and cheerfulness of mind. Commit yourself to God — to preserve, guide, and assist you through the day — to enable you to perform the common duties of it with diligence and alacrity — with an eye to his glory. When the devotions of the morning are ended, enter with

" A LITTLE PLAN.' 5 21

cautious steps into the world — earnestly endeavoring to keep up the fear and reverence of the Deity on your mind. Attend family devotion with fixed attention. — To domestic concerns for the first hour after breakfast, with diligence and perseverance. Here beware of a morose, unsocial habit. Remember you were not formed for yourself alone, but for society. Labor to maintain a cheerfulness in your manners and conversation. Observe respect and attention to superiors — affability and kindness to inferiors — condescension and kindness to all with whom you may associate. Under this head I would recommend that you endeavor to suppress pride, and a tenaciousness of your own opinions. The next half hour to writing ; either copying from some favorite author (which will give you ease of style and assist you in spelling) or writing letters, or in committing to writing some of your own best observations. When this is done, spend the remainder of the forenoon in sewing, at the same time in endeavoring to bring the mind into a regular train of thinking. The first whole or half hour after dinner in reading. Visiting and receiving good company is no loss of time. Before you make your visits, recollect with what temptations you will be most likely to meet, and guard against them. In the evening, retire if possible, and review the actions, words, and thoughts of the day ; return thanks for the mercies received in the day, and commit yourself to the protection of heaven. Let your last thoughts be as much as possible on your entire dependence upon God for every blessing; your own unworthiness, the merits and offered salvation of Christ. This Plan observe every day in the week (excepting the Sabbath), only on Saturday evenings devote an hour to prayer, in returning thanks for the mercies of the past week — for the influence of the Spirit on your own, and the souls of all your relations, and those who are dear to you by any ties or connection, and for a blessing on the means of grace you may enjoy on the following day. On Sabbath morning endeavor to rise half an hour earlier than on other days ; spend the first hour as usual ; the time after, until divine service begins, as much as is convenient, in reading. After service, some time in committing to writing what you have heard, and likewise in the afternoon. The remainder of the day as much as

" WATTS ON THE MIND." 23

possible in reading. In the evening review the actions of the day. Close it with prayer."

" Eliza Kneeland."

This paper is without date. It was evidently drawn up before her marriage, and presents the model of her life. Among her papers is a collection of " Extracts" from the best authors, such as Addison, Watts, Cowper, Thomson, Newton, Zimmerman, Mason on Self Knowledge ; also from various Sermons and Books of History. The extracts are of a devotional and literary character. The following from " Watts on the Improvement of the Mind," are so descriptive of her own habits, and so worthy of regard by the young, that I cannot forbear quoting them :

" Offer your daily requests to the Father of Lights, that he would bless all your attempts and labors in reading, study and conversation. Think with yourself how easily and insensibly, by one turn of thought, he can lead you into a large scene of ideas. He can teach you to lay hold on a clew which may guide your thoughts with safety and ease through all the difficulties of an intricate subject. Think how easily the

Author of your being can direct your motions by his providence, so that a glance of the eye, or a word striking the ear, or a sudden turn of the fancy, shall conduct you to a train of happy sentiments. By his secret and supreme method of government, he can draw you to read such a treatise, or converse with such a person, who may give you more light upon some deep subject in an hour, than you could obtain by a month of your own solitary labor. Think with yourself, with how much ease the God of your spirits can cast into your mind some useful suggestions, and give a happy turn to your own thoughts, or the thoughts of those with whom you may converse, whence you may derive unspeakable delight and satisfaction in a matter that has long puzzled and entangled you. He can shew you a path which the vulture's eye hath not seen, and lead you, by some unknown gate or portal, out of a wilderness or labyrinth of difficulties, wherein you have been long wandering. Fetch down some knowledge from the clouds, the stars, the sun, the moon, and the revolution of all the planets ; dig and draw up some valuable meditations from the depths of the earth, and search them through the vast ocean of waters ; extract

" WATTS ON THE MIND." 25

some intellectual improvement from the minerals and metals ; from the wonders of nature among the vegetables, the herbs, the trees and the flowers. Learn some lesson from the birds, and the beasts, and the meanest insect. Read the wisdom of God, and his admirable contrivance in them all ; read his almighty power ; his rich and varied goodness in all the works of his hands. From the days and nights, the hours and the flying minutes, learn a wise improvement of time, and be watchful to seize every opportunity to increase in knowledge."

Chapter II

A MORE PARTICULAR ACCOUNT OF HER RELIGIOUS EX- ERCISES FROM CHILDHOOD TO THE AGE OF TWENTY- THREE.

As the piety of Mrs. McFarland was the crowning excellence of her character, I deem it important to state all the particulars we know, of the commencement, growth and maturity of it : " First the blade, then the ear, after that the full corn in the ear. ,} Mark 4 : 28. Happily, our information on this part of her history is as full and explicit as could reasonably be expected. From her own pen, under date of March 10, 1811, we have the following unfinished account of her early religious impressions :

" Having for some time been exercised with many distressing doubts respecting my spiritual estate, 1 have resolved, by divine grace, to pen down some account of my life, with the exercises of my mind — the better to enable me to know whether I have passed from death unto life, or whether I have deceived myself with a ' name to live while I am dead. 5

" The first recollection that I have of any thing, was at about the age of three or four years, when my dear mother, with her arms about me, would tell me of God — his omniscience — my accountability to him — of heaven and hell. These truths would strongly impress my mind, and commonly affect me in such a manner as to draw tears from my eyes, and induce me to go alone and pray to God. My seasons for prayer, however, were accidental : as when any calamity threatened myself, or the town — as an alarming sickness, or the talk of national calamity. Then I would pray for the preservation of myself and friends. Commonly when reading or hearing of pious children, as the Lives in what is called the ' Token for Children, 5 or Edwards 5 ' Phebe Bartlett, 5 I was very much affected, and earnestly wished, as I thought, to be like them.

" When about eight years old, I was carried by my mother to visit her friends in the District of Maine, York being her native place. I several times heard the Rev. Mr. Lyman preach. His earnest exhortations to his hearers to choose

EARLY IMPRESSIONS. 29

the ways of religion would forcibly impress my mind, and lead me to resolve that I would be religious. At that time I had no ideas of my own insufficiency to be truly so ; but thought it would be effected by much prayer to God — by abstaining from vanity, and my childish companions and amusements, and reading the bible. But these resolutions, as they were made in my own strength, did not abide much temptation. On returning to my native place, my companions claimed my attention, and my determination to be religious was relinquished for that time,

" At twelve years old I was called to bury my dear and very affectionate father ; but notwithstanding God's visitations toward me, I fell again into courses of vanity and folly. My mother was continually laboring with me and for me, that I might become truly pious, and devote myself to God. I was about that time much engaged and affected with reading 4 Alleine's Alarm to the Unconverted,' ' Boston's Fourfold State/ and some other books of the like description ; but had no just ideas of the character of God. The adorable attributes of his justice, mercy and holiness were beyond my comprehension.

This was at the age of from fourteen to sixteen. I was laboriously working out a righteousness of my own, — which from time to time I found incomplete and insufficient. O astonishing stupidity ! — that at the very time I was reading ' Boston's Fourfold State/ where this subject is so fully and plainly described, and the variety of the works of the law pointed out, that I should so repeatedly and earnestly endeavor to weave a garment of my own righteousness, in which to appear before God as a Christian. I am astonished to review 7 my own stupidity and God's forbearance with me. Somewhere about this time I attempted to enter into what I called a Covenant with God : which was to this effect. I acknowledged myself a great sinner ; endeavored to confess all the sins of my life ; confessed to God that I had often resolved against sinning, but had broken these resolutions ; — that now I did more earnestly resolve against transgression, and promised to avoid all sins of thought, word and action — and solemnly, on my knees, devoted myself to God ; and, if I recollect aright, telling the Divine Being that if I did again return to sin he might justly cast me off. This Covenant with God, as 1 called it, did not, however,

DANGEROUS SICKNESS. 31

bring me any solid peace. I found that I daily broke God's holy law ; and on examining my heart more closely, I found that it was wholly sinful — filled with sinful thoughts or desires. In this way I continued till about the age of twenty — sometimes praying, or observing the form of private prayer ; at another, neglecting it for weeks. I then thought that I was religious; but now I can see that my heart was supremely devoted to the world. About nineteen or twenty, I was visited with the yellow fever, which then prevailed in Boston. Many of my acquaintance were dying on the right hand and on the left, which greatly terrified me. My life was despaired of. I thought, one night in particular, that I should die and certainly go to hell ; but oh ! God was pleased to spare me, again to return to life."

Here her narrative abruptly closes ; but it may be added, that this sickness greatly deepened her religious impressions. During the continuance of it, though she knew that death was making great ravages, yet she was not permitted to know who were among its victims, till after her recovery — when a list of the deaths was put into her hands. Here she saw the names of many whom she knew and loved, and the inquiry arose in her mind, " Why am I spared ?" She was much affected by hearing a sermon from the words, " Were there not ten cleansed? but ivhere are the nine ? There are not found that returned to give glory to God, save this stranger" Luke 17 : 17, 18. It was applied particularly to those who had recovered from the' fever. It was, however, some time after this before she obtained a hope of salvation : " Often," said she, " have I gone home from meeting, after hearing our minister, Dr. Eckley, preach, saying to myself, ' Well, his skirts will be clear of my blood. If I do not regard these warnings and invitations, my condemnation will be just.' " One reason, she observed, that she remained so long in the dark, was, " We did not have meetings for inquiry then, and I was afraid to open my mind to others. I was ignorant of the nature of true religion, and especially of the way of salvation through Christ."

" How did you finally obtain comfort ?" — " Very gradually ; and among other means I remember these : — My mother used to invite me into the female prayer meeting, which, after my father's death was held at her house. Among