The Way of the World and Love for Love

Front matter

Sirens neces ee

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EEE ra oF Perey ee 3,

II 2) TheiwAyv or the Ww OluD

Fain. Confess. Millamant and you quarrell’d last Night, after I left you; my fair Cousin has some Humours that wou’d tempt the Patience of a Stoick. What, some Coxcomb came in, and was well receiv’d by her, while you were by.

Mira. Witwoud and Petulant; and what was worse, her Aunt, your Wife’s Mother, my evil Genius; or to sum up all in her own Name, my old Lady Wishfort came in.——

Fain. O there it is then——She has a lasting Passion for you, and with Reason.—— What, then my Wife was there?

Mira. Yes, and Mrs. Marwood and three or four more, whom I never saw before; seeing me, they all put on their grave Faces, whisper’d one another; then complain’d aloud of the Vapours, and after fell into a profound Silence.

Fain. They had a mind to be rid of you.

Mira. For which good Reason I resolv’d not to Stir. At last the good old Lady broke thro’ her painful Taciturnity, with an Invective against long Visits. I would not have understood her, but Mi//amant joining in the Argument, I rose and with a constrain’d Smile told her, I thought nothing was so easie as to know when a Visit began to be troublesome; she reden’d and I withdrew, without expecting her reply.

Fain. You were to blame to resent what she spoke only in Compliance with her Aunt.

Mira. She is more Mistress of her self, than to be under the necessity of such a Resignation.

Fain. What? tho’ half her Fortune depends upon her Marrying with my Lady’s Approbation P

Mira. 1 was then in such a Humour, that I shou’d have been better pleas’d if she had been less discreet.

Fain. Now 1 remember, I wonder not they were weary of you; last Night was one of their Cabal-Nights ; they have ’em three times a Week, and meet by turns, aime WAYoot the WORLD 13 | at one another’s Apartments, where they come together like the Coroner’s Inquest, to sit upon the murder’d Reputations of the Week. You and I are excluded; and it was once propos’d that all the Male Sex shou’d | be excepted; but some body mov’d that to avoid Scandal |there might be one Man of the Community; upon which Witwoud and Petulant were enroll’d Members.

| Mira, And who may have been the Foundress of this Sect? My Lady Wishfort, | warrant, who publishes her _Detestation of Mankind; and full of the Vigour of Fifty five, declares for a Friend and Ratafia; and let | Posterity shift for it self, she’ll breed no more.

Fain. The Discovery of your sham Addresses to her, to conceal your Love to her Neice, has provok’d this Separation: Had you dissembl’d better, Things might have continu’d in the State of Nature.

Mira. \ did as much as Man cou’d, with any reasonable Conscience; I proceeded to the very last A& of Flattery with her, and was guilty of a Song in her Commendation. Nay, I got a Friend to put her into a Lampoon, and compliment her with the Imputation of an Affair with a young Fellow, which I carry’d so far, that I told her the malicious Town took notice that she was grown fat of a sudden; and when she lay in of a Dropsie, persuaded her she was reported to be in Labour. The Devil’s in’t, if an old Woman is to be flatter’d further, unless a Man shou’d endeavour downright personally to debauch her; and that my Vertue forbad me. But for the Discovery of this Amour, I am indebted to your Friend, or your Wife’s Friend, Mrs. Marwood.

Fain. What shou’d provoke her to be your Enemy, unless she has made you Advances, which you have slighted? Women do not easily forgive Omissions of that Nature.

Mira. She was always civil to me, ’till of late; I confess I am not one of those Coxcombs who are apt to interpret a Woman’s good Manners to her Prejudice ;

ia Pee W ALY om tlic mVVeer Lae and think that she who does not refuse ’em ev’ry thing, can refuse ’em nothing.

Fain. You are a gallant Man, Mirabell, and tho’ you may have Cruelty enough, not to satisfie a Lady’s longing; you have too much Generosity, not to be tender of her Honour. Yet you speak with an Indifference which seems to be afteéted; and confesses you are conscious of a Negligence. :

Mira. You pursue the Argument with a Distrust that seems to be unaffected, and confesses you are conscious of a Concern for which the Lady is more indebted to you, than is your Wife.

Fain. Fie, fie Friend, if you grow censorious I must leave you;——I’ll look upon the Gamesters in the next Room.

Mira. Who are they?

Fain. Petulant and Witwoud—Bring me some Chocolate. |

Mira. Betty, what says your Clock ?

Bet. Turn’d of the last Canonical Hour, Sir.

Mira. How pertinently the Jade answers me! Ha? almost one a Clock! [Looking on his Watch.) O, y’are con C————

Enter FootTMan.

Mira. Well; is the grand Affair over? You have been something tedious.

Serv. Sir, there’s such Coupling at Pancras, that they stand behind one another, as ’twere in a Country Dance. Ours was the last Couple to lead up; and no Hopes appearing of Dispatch, besides, the Parson growing hoarse, we were afraid his Lungs wou’d have fail’d before it came to our Turn; so we drove round to Dyke’s- Place; and there they were rivetted in a trice.

Mira. So, so, you are sure they are married.

Serv. Married and Bedded, Sir: I am Witness.

Mira. Have you the Certificate ?

eine wean .of the WOR LD “15

Serv. Here it is, Sir.

Mira. Has the Tailor brought Waitwell’s Cloaths home, and the new Liveries?

Serv. Yes, Sir.

Mira. That’s well. Do you go home again, d’ye hear, and adjourn the Consummation ’till farther Order; bid WW aitwell shake his Ears, and Dame Parilet rustle up her Feathers, and meet me at One a Clock by Rosamona’s Pond; that I may see her before she returns to her Lady: And as you tender,your Ears be secret.

[Exit SERVANT.