Ten years in Washington: or, Life and scenes in the national capital, as a woman sees them. Including a full and authentic history of the life and death of President James A. Garfield

Front matter

OR,

INSIDE LIFE AND SCENES

IN

Chapter I

FROM THE VERY BEGINNING. PAGK.

The Young Surveyor’s Dream — A Vision of the Future Capital — The United States Government on Wheels — Ambitious Offers — The Rival Rivers — Temporay Lodgings for Eleven Years — Old-Fashioned Simplicity — A Great Man’s Modesty —Conflicting Claims — A Convincing Fact — The Dreadful Quakers —

A Condescending Party — A Slight Amendment — An Old Bill Brought to Light Again — The Future Strangely Foreshadowed — A Dinner of Some Consequence— How it was Done — Really a Stranger — A Nice Proposal — Sweetening the Pill — A “ Revulsion of Stomach,” ,21

Chapter II. Cross Purposes And Queer Speculations

Bona of Much Bother — Undefined Apprehensions — Debates on the Coming City — Old World Examples — Sir James Expresses an Opinion — A Dream of the Distant West — An Old-time Want — A Curious Statement of Fact — Where is the Center of Population — An Important Proclamation — Original Land Owners — Well-worn Patents — Getting on with Pugnacious Planters — Obstinate David Bums — A “Widow’s Mite” of Some Magnitude — How the Scotchman was Subjugated — A Rather “Forcible Argument,” . . .31

Chapter III. The Work Begun In Earnest

Washington’s Faith in the Future — Mr. Sparks is “Inclined to Think” — A Slight Miscalculation — Theoretical Spartans — Clinging to Old World Glories — Jefferson Acts the Critic — He Communicates Some Ideas — Models of Antiquity— Babylon Revived — Difficulty in Satisfying a Frenchman’s Soul — The Man Who Planned the Capital — Who Was L’ Enfant? — His Troubles — His Dismissal — His Personal Appearance, Old Age, Death, and Burial Place —

His Successor — A Magnificent Plan — A Record Which Can Never Perish —

An Overpaid Quaker — Jefferson Expresses His Sentiments — A Sable Franklin— The Negro Engineer, Benjamin Bancker — A Chance for a Monument, . 3P

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Contents

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Chapter IV

OLD WASHINGTON. PAGE.

How the City Was Built — “ A Matter of Moonshine ”■ — Calls for Paper — Besieging Congressmen — How They Raised the Money — The Government Requires Sponsors — Birth of the Nation’s Capital — Seventy Years Ago in Washington — Graphic Picture of Early Times — A Much-Marrying City — Unwashed Virginian Belles — Stuck in the Mud — Extraordinary Religious Services, . . .51

Chapter V. The Capital Of The Nation

Expectations Disappointed — Funds Low and People Few — Slow Progress of the City — A Question of Importance Discussed — Generous Proposition of George Washington — Faith Under Difficulties — Transplanting an Entire College — An Old Proposition in a New Shape — What Washington “Society” Lacks — Perils of the Way — A Long Plain of Mud — Egyptian Dreariness — The End of an Expensive Canal — The Water of Tiber Creek — Divided Allegiance of Old — The Stirring of a Nation’s Heart — A Personal Interest, . „ 62

Chapter VI. The Washington Of The Present Day

Hopes Realized — Washington in 1873 — Major L’Enfant’s Dream — Old and New — “ Modern Improvements ” — A City of Palaces — The Capital in all its Glory — Traces of the War — Flowers on the Ramparts — Under the Oaks of Arlington— Ten Years Ago — The Birth of a Century — The Reign of Peace, . 72

CHAPTER Vn.

WHAT MADE NEW WASHINGTON.

Municipal Changes — Necessity of Reform — The “Organic Act” Passed — Contest for the Governorship of Columbia District — Mr. Henry D. Cooke Appointed— Board of Public Works Constituted — Great Improvements Made — Opposition — The Board and Its Work, 76

Chapter VIII. Building The Capitol

Various Plans for the Building — Jefferson Writes to the Commissioners — “Poor Hallett” and His Plan — Wanton Destruction by the British, A. D. 1814 —

The Site Chosen by Washington Himself— Imposing Ceremonies at the Foundation— Dedicatory Inscription on the Silver Plate — Interesting Festivities — Extension of the Building — Daniel Webster’s Inscription — His Eloquent and Patriotic Speech — Mistaken Calculations — First Session of Representatives Sitting in “the Oven” — Old Capitol Prison — Immense Outlay upon the Wings and Dome — Compared with St. Peter’s and St. Paul’s — The Goddess of Liberty — The Congressional Library — What Ought to be Done, • 83

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CONTENTS.

Chapter IX

INSIDE THE CAPITOL. PAGB

A Visit to the Capitol — The Lower Hall — Its Cool Tranquility— ^Artistic Treasures— The President’s and Vice-President’s Rooms — The Marble Room — The Senate Chamber — “ Men I Have Known ” — Hamlin — Foote — Foster — Wade — Colfax — Wilson — The Rotunda — Great Historical Paintings — The Old Hall of Representatives — The New Hall — The Speaker’s Room — Native Art —

“ The Star of Empire ” — A National Picture, 92

Chapter X. Outside The Capitol

The Famous Bronze Doors — The Capitol Grounds — Statue of Washington Criticised — Horace Greenough’s Defence of the Statue — Picturesque Scenery

!' Around the Capitol — The City and Suburbs — The Public Reservation — The Smithsonian Institution — The Potomac and the Hights of Arlington, . .104

Chapter XI. Art Treasures Of The Capitol

Arrival of a Solitary Lady — “ The Pantheon of America ” — II Penserosa — Milton’s Ideal — Dirty Condition of the House of Representatives — The Goddess of Melancholy — Vinnie Ream’s Statue of Lincoln — Its Grand Defects — Necessary Qualifications for a Sculptor — The Bust of Lincoln by Mrs. Ames — General Greene and Roger Williams — Barbarous Garments of Modern Times — Statues of Jonathan Trumbull and Roger Sherman — Bust of Kosciusco — Pulling his Nose — Alexander Hamilton — Fate of Senator Burr — Statue of Baker — His Last Speech Prophetic — The Glory of a Patriotic Example — The Lesson which Posterity Learns — Horatio Stone, the Sculptor — Neglected Condition of the Capitol Statuary — Curious Clock — Grotesque Plaster Image of Liberty — Webster — Clay — Adams — The Pantheon at Rome — The French

Pantheon, 109

Chapter XII. Women With Claims

The Senate Reception-Room — The People who Haunt it — Republican “ Ladies in Waiting ” — “ Women with Claims ” — Their Heroic Persistency — A Widow and Children in Distress — Claim Agents — The Committee of Claims — A Kind-Hearted Senator’s Troubles — Buttonholing a Senator — A Lady of Energy — Resolved to Win — An “ Office Brokeress ” — A Dragon of a Woman —

A Lady who is Feared if not Respected — Her Unfortunate Victims — Carrying “ Her Measure ” — The Beautiful Petitioner — The Cloudy Side of Her Character— Her Subtle Dealings — Her Successes, 120

Chapter XIII. The Congressional Library

Inside the Library — The Librarian — Sketch of Mr. Spofford — How Congressional Speeches are Manufactured—" Spofford ” in Congress — The Library

CONTENTS.

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Building — Diagram — Dimensions of the Hall — The Iron Book Cases — The Law Library — Five Miles of Book Shelves — Silent Study—' “Abstracting ” Books — Amusing Adventure — A Senator in a Quandary — Making Love Under Difficulties — Library Regulations — Privileged Persons — Novels and their Readers — Books of Reference — Compared with the British Museum — Curious Old Newspapers — Files of Domestic and Foreign Papers — One Hundred Defunct Journals — An Incident of the War of 1814 — Putting it to the Vote — “Carried Unanimously ” — 35,000 Volumes Destroyed — Treasurers of Art Consumed — The New Library — The Next Appropriation, .... 127

Chapter XIV. A Visit To The New Law Library

How a Library was Offered to Congress — Mr. King’s Proposal — An Fye to Theology— The Smithsonian Library Transferred — The Good Deeds of Peter Force — National Documents — Eliot’s Indian Bible — Literary Treasures — The Lawyers Want a Library for Themselves — The Finest Law Library in the World — First Edition of Blackstone — Report of the Trial of Cagliostro, Rohan and La Motte — Marie Antoinette’s Diamond Necklace — A Long Life- Service — An Architect Buried Beneath his own Design — “ Underdone Pie-crust”— Reminiscences of Daniel Webster and the Girard Will, . . . 138

Chapter XV. The Heaven Of Legal Ambition — The Supreme Court Room

Memories of Clay, Webster, and Calhoun — Legal Giants of the Past — Stately Serenity of the Modern Court — “Wise Judgment and Wine Dinners” — The Supreme Court in Session — Soporific Influences — A Glimpse of the Veritable “Bench” — The Ladies’ Gallery — The Chief Justices of the Past — His Apotheosis — Chief-Justice Chase— Black-Robed Dignitaries — An Undignified Procession — The “ Crier” in Court — Antique Proclamation — The Consultation-Room— Gowns of Office — Reminiscence of Judge McLean — “ Uncle Henry and his Charge ” — Fifty Years in Office, 144

Chapter XVI. The “mecca” Of The American

The Center of a Nation’s Hopes — Stirring Reminiscences of the Capitol — History Written in Stone — Patriotic Expression of Charles Sumner — Building “for all Time” — “This our Fathers Did for Us ” — The Interest of Humanity— A Secret Charm for a Thoughtful Mind — An Idea of Equality — The Destiny of the Stars and Stripes — A Mother’s Ambition — The Dying Soldier, 148

Chapter XVII. The Capitol Morning Sights And Scenes

The Capitol in Spring — A Magic Change — Arrival of Visitors — A New Race — “Billing and Cooing” — Lovers at the Capitol — A Dream of Perpetual Spring — Spending the Honeymoon in Washington — New Edition of David Copperfield and Dora — •“ Very Young” — Divided Affections : The New Bride

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CONTENTS.

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— Jonathan and Jane — Memories of a Wedding Dress — An Interview with a Bride — “Two Happy Idiots ” — A Walk in the City — President Grant — The Foreign Ambassadors — “Beau” Hickman — An Erratic Genius — Walt Whitman the Poet — A “Loafer” of Renown — Poets at Home— Piatt — Burroughs— Harriet Prescott Spofford — Sumner and Chase — Tiresome Men — How to Love a Tree, 153

Chapter XVIII. Fair Washington — A Ramble In Early Spring

Washington Weather — Sky Scenery — Professor Tyndall Expresses an Opinion — A Picture of Beauty — Prejudiced Views — Birds of Rock Creek — The Parsonage— A Scene of Tranquil Beauty — A Washington May — Charms of the Season — Mowers at Work — The Public Parks — Frolics of the Little Ones — Strawberry Festivals — “ Flower Gathering,” . . . . . .162

Chapter XIX. Inside The White House — Shadows Of The Past

Haunted Houses — Shadows of the Past — Touching Memories — The Little Angels Born There — A State of Perpetual Dampness — Dingy Aspect of a Monarch’s Palace — Outside the White House — A Peep Inside the Mansion —

The Emperor of Japan Supersedes the Punch-Bowl — The Unfinished “ Banqueting-Hall ” — Glories of a Levee — Magnificent Hospitalities — A Comfortable Dining-Room — A Lady of Taste — An American “Baronial Hall” — The Furniture of Another Generation — A Valuable Steward — A Professor of Gastronomy— Paying the Professor and Providing the Dinner — Feeding the Celebrities — Mrs. Lincoln’s Unpopular Innovations — Fifteen Hundred Dollars for a Dinner — How Prince Arthur, of England, was Entertained — Domestic Economy — “ Not Enough Silver” — A Tasty Soup — The Recipe for an Aristocratic Stew — Having a “ Nice Time” — Hatred of Flummery — An Admirer of Pork and Beans and Slap-jacks — A Presidential Reception — Ready for the Festival — Splendor, Weariness and Indigestion — Paying the Penalty — In the Conservatory — Domestic Arrangements — Reminiscence of Abraham Lincoln, . 167

Chapter XX. Ladies Of The White House

A Morning Dream — Wives and Daughters of the Presidents — An Average Matron of the 18th Century — Educational Disadvantages — A Well-Regulated A Lady — Useful Wife — Advantages of Having a Distinguished Husband — A Modern Lucretia — Washington’s Inauguration Suit — An Awkward Position for a Lady — Festivities in Franklin Square! — Transporting the Household Gods — Keeping Early Hours — Primitive Customs — Much-Shaken Hands — Remembrances of a Past Age — Very Questionable Humility — The Room in which Washington Died — Days of Widowhood — A Wife’s Congratulations —

A True Woman — Domestic Affairs at the White House — An Unfinished Mansion— Interesting Details — A Woman’s Influence — A Monument Wanted — Devotion of a Husband — The “ Single Life ” — Disappointed Belles — An Extraordinary Reception — Blacked IP" Own Boots — A Daughter’s Affection, . 177

CONTENTS.

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CHAPTER XXI. pagb.

WIVES OF THE PRESIDENTS — LIFE AT THE WHITE HOUSE.

A Social Queen — “ The Most Popular Person in the United States ” — The Slow Days of Old — Traveling Under Difficulties — Political Pugnacity — Formality versus Hospitality — Big Dishes Laughed at — A Foreign Minister Criticises — Advantages of a Good Memory — Funny Adventure of a Rustic Youth — A Strange Pocketful — Putting Him at His Ease — Doleful Visage of a New President— Getting Rid of a Burden — A Brave Lady — Waiting in Suspense — Taking Care of Cabinet Papers — Watching and Waiting — Flight — Unscrewing the Picture — After the War — Brilliant Receptions — Mrs. Madison’s Snuff- Box — Clay Takes a Pinch — “ This is my Polisher !” — Two Plain Old Ladies from the West — They Depart in Peace — Days of Trouble and Care — Manuscripts Purchased by Congress — Last Days of a Good Woman — Mrs. Monroe — A Severe and Aristocratic Woman — Madame Lafayette in Prison, . .192

Chapter XXII. Noted Wqmen Of Washington — A Chapter Of Gossip

A Traveling Lady — Life in Russia — A Modern American Minister — A long and Lonely Journey — The Court of St James — Peculiar Waists — Costume of an Ancient Belle — Fearful and Wonderful Attire of a Beau — “A suit of Steel”

— An Ascendant Star — A Man Who Hid his Feelings — The Candidate at a Cattle Show — Charles’s Opinion of His Mother — How a Lady “ Amused ” Her Declining Days — A Woman’s Influence — Politics and Piety Disagree — Why the General Didn’t Join the Church — AUead “Full of Politics” — Swearing Some — The President Becomes a Good Boy — Domestic Tendencies, . 204

Chapter XXIII. Scenes At The White House — Men And Women Of Note

Widows “ at par ” — Four Sonless Presidents — Supported by Flattery — A Delicate Constitution — Living to a Respectable Age — Teaching Her Grandson How to Fight — A Pathetic Reminiscence — A Perfect Gentlewoman — Obeying St. Paul— A Woman Who “ Kept Silence ” — “ Sarah Knows Where It Is ” — Three Queens in the Background — A Very Handsome Woman — A Lady’s Heroism — A Man Who Kept to His Post — A Life in the Savage Wilderness —

A Life’s Devotion — The Colonel’s Brave Wife — Objecting to the Presidency—

An Inclination for Retirement — The Penalty of Greatness — Death in the White House — A Wife’s Prayers — A New Rerjime — The Clothier’s Apprentice and the School Teacher — The Future President Builds His Own House — Domestic Happiness — Twenty-seven Years of Married Life — Home “Comforts” at the White House — The Memory of a Loving Wife, . . . .218

Chapter XXIV. The White House During The War

Under a Cloud — “ A Woman Among a Thousand ” — Revival of By-gone Days — Another Lady of the White House — A “ Golden Blonde ” — Instinct Alike

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with Power and Grace — A Fun-Loving Romp — Harriet with her Wheelbarrow of Wood — A Deed of Kindness — The Wheel Turns Round — Gay Doings at the Capital — Rival Claims for a Lady’s Hand — Reigning at the White House « — Doing Double Duty — Marriage of Harriet Lane — As Wife and Mother —

Mrs. Abraham Lincoln — Standing Alone — A Time of Trouble and Perplexity . — Rumors of War — Whispers of Treason — Awaiting the Event — A Life-long Ambition Fulfilled — The Nation Called to Arms — What the President’s Wife Did — The Dying and the Dead — Arrival of Troops — The Lonely Man at the White House — An Example of Selfishness — Petty Economies — The Back Door of the White House — An Injured Individual — Death of Willie Lincoln — Injustice which Mrs. Lincoln Suffered — The Rabble in the White House — Valuables Carried Away — Big Boxes and Much Goods — Mrs. Lincoln Disconsolate — Missing Treasures — Faults of a President’s Wife, 231

Chapter XXV. The White House Now

After the War — A Contrast — Secretly Burying the Dead — A Wife of Seventeen Years — Midnight Studies — Broken Down — A party of Grandchildren — “ God’s* Best Gift to Man ” — The Woman Who Taught the President — Doing the Honors at the White House — Traces of the Soldiers — A State of Dirt and Ruin —

Mrs. Patterson’s Calico Dress — In the Diary — A Nineteenth Century Wonder — How the Old Carpets were Patched — How $30,000 were Spent — Buying the Furniture — Working in Hot Weather — Very Good Dinners — Doors Open to the Mob — Sketching a Banquet — The Portraits of the Presidents — The Impeachment Trial — Peace in the Family — The Grant Dynasty — Looking Home-like — Mrs. Grant at Home — What Might Be Done, if — How a Certain

! Young Lady was Spoilt — Brushing Away “the Dew of Innocence,” . . 243

Chapter XXVI. Reception Day At The White House — Glimpses Of Life

Feeling Good-Natured — Looking After One’s Friends— Ready to Forgive— Mr. Grant’s “Likeable Side” — Rags and Tatters Departed — The Work of Relic- Hunters — Eight Presidents, All in a Row — Shadows of the Departed — A Present from the Sultan of Turkey — A List of Finery — A Scene Not Easily Forgotten— How They Wept for Their Martyr — Tales which a Room Might Tell — Underneath the Gold and Lace — The Census of Spittoons — “ A Horror in Our Land ” — The Shadow of Human Nature — Two “ Quizzing ” Ladies — An Illogical Dame — Her “ Precarious Organ ” — A Lady of Many Colors — “ A New Woman ” — A Vegetable Comparison — The Lady of the Manor — Women Who are Not Ashamed of Womanhood — Observed and Admired of All — Sketch of a Perfect Woman — After the Lapse of Generations — The “ German ”

— The “Withering” of Many American Women — Full Dress and No Dress — What the Princess Ghika Thinks — A Young Girl’s Dress — “ That Dreadful Woman ” — The Resolution of a Young Man, 256

CONTENTS.

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Chapter XXVII

INAUGURATION DAY AT WASHINGTON. PAGE.

My Own Private Opinion — The Little “ Sons of War "Feeling Bad — Brutal Mothers — Our Heroes — Later Festivities — A Lively Time — The Mighty Drum- Major — “Taken for a Nigger” — Magnificent Display — The Oldest Regiment in the States — Sketches of Well-known Men — Blacque Bey — Full Turkish Costume — The Japanese Minister — The Supreme Court — Congress Alive Again — The Valedictory — Taking the Oath — “The Little Gentleman in the Big Chair” — His Little Speech — His Wife and Family Behind — The New President — Memories of Another Scene — The Curtain Falls, 269

Chapter XXVIII. A Peep At An Inauguration Ball

How Sixty Thousand Dollars were Spent — Something Wrong : “Twas Ever Thus ” — A Fine Opportunity for a Few Naughty Words — Lost Jewels — The Colored Folks in a Fix — Six Thousand People Clamoring for Their Clothes!

— A Magnificent “Grab” — Weeping on Window-ledges — Left Desolate — Walking under Difficulties — The Exploit of Two Old Gentlemen — Horace Greeley Loses his Old White Hat — He says Naughty Words of Washington —

A Little Too Cold — Gay Decorations — Modesty in Scanty Garments — The President Frozen — Ladies of Distinction — Half-frozen Beauties — Why and Wherefore % — A Stolid Tanner Who Fought his Way, 27&

Chapter XXIX. The United States Treasury — Its History

The Responsibilities and Duties of the Secretary of the Treasury — Three Extraordinary Men — Hamilton Makes an Honest Proposal — The Mint at Philadelphia— A Little Personal Abuse — The Secretary Borrows Twenty Dollars — Modern Greediness — The Genius Becomes a Lawyer — Burning of Records — Hunting for Blunders and Frauds — The Treasury Building — A Little Variety — A Vision of Much Money — Old Debts Raked Up — Signs of the Times — The National Currency Act — Enormous Increase of the National Debt — Facts and Figures — The Credit of the Government Sustained — President Grant’s Rule — George S. Boutwell Made Secretary — Great Expectations, . . . 284

Chapter XXX

INSIDE THE TREASURY — TnE HISTORY OF A DOLLAR. w01d Hickory ” Erects his Cane — “Put the Building Right Here” — A Very Costly Building — The Workers Within — The Business of Three Thousand People — The Mysteries of the Treasury — Inside the Booms — Mary Harris’s Revenge — The “ Drones ” in the Hive — Making Love in Office Hours — Flirtations in Public — A List of Miserable Sinners — A Pitiful Ancient Dame — Women’s Work in the Treasury — The Bureau of Printing and Engraving — Dealing in Big Figures — The Story of a Paper Dollar — In the Upper Floor —

The Busy Workers — Night Work — Where the Paper is Made — The “Local-

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ized Blue Fibre ” — The Obstacle to the Counterfeiter — The Automatic Register— Keeping Watch — The Counters and Examiners — An Armed Escort — Varieties of Printing — The Contract with Adams’ Express — Printing the Notes and Currency — Internal Revenue Stamps — Manufacturing the Plates —

The Engraving Division — “ Men of Many Minds ” — Delicate Operations — A Pressure of Five or Six Tons — The Plate Complete — “ Re-entering ” a Plate — An “ Impression ” — How Old Plates are Used Up — A Close Inspection — Defying Imitation — The Geometric Lathe, ....... 303

Chapter XXXI. The Workers In The Treasury — How The Money Is Made

The Dollar with the Counters — In the Tubs — Getting a Wetting — Servants of Necessity — That Scorching Roof — Brown Paper Bonnets — A State of Dampness— Squaring Accounts — Superintending the Work — The Face-printing Division— The United States “ Sealer ” — Printing Cigar-Stamps and Gold-Notes of Many Colors — With a Begrimed Face — The Fiery Little Brazier — What the Man Does — The Woman’s Work — The Automatic Register — An Observer Without a Soul — Our Damp Little Dollar — The Drying Room — The First Wrinkles — Looking Wizened and Old — Rejuvenating a Dollar — Underneath Two Hundred and Forty Tons — Smooth and Polished — Precious to the Touch — A Virgin Dollar — The “ Sealer” at Work — Mutilated Paper — What the Women are paid — The Surface-Sealing Division — Seal Printing — The Aristocratic Green Seal — The Numbering Division — Dividing the Dollars — Snowy Aprons and Delicate Ribbons — Needling the Sheet — A Blade that Does not Fail — Sorting the Notes — The Manipulation of the Ladies — The Dollar “ In its Little Bed ” — Dollar on Dollar — “Awaiting the Final Call,” . . .317

Chapter XXXII. The Last Days Of A Dollar

Ready for the World — Starting Right — Forty Busy Maids and Matrons — Counting Out the Money — Human Machines — A Lady Counting for a Dozen Years Fifty Thousand Notes in a Day — Counting Four Thousand Notes in Twenty Minutes — What has Passed Through Some Fingers — Big Figures — Packing Away the Dollars — The Cash Division — The Marble Cash-Room — The Great Iron Vault — Where Uncle Sam Keeps His Money — Some Nice Little Packages - — Taking it Coolly — One Hundred Millions of Dollars in Hand — Some Little White Bags — The Gold Taken from the Banks of Richmond — A Distinction Without a Difference — The Secret of the Locks — The Hydraulic Elevator — Sending the Money off — Begrimed, Demoralized, and Despoiled — Where is Our Pretty Dollar? — The Redemption Division — Counting Mutilated Currency — Women at Work — Sorting Old Greenbacks — Three Hundred Counterfeit Dollars Daily — Detecting Bad Notes — “ Short,” “ Over,” and “ Counterfeit ” — Difficulty of Counterfeiting Fresh Notes — Vast Amounts Sent for Redemption — Thirty-one Million Dollars in One Year — The Assistant Treasurer at New York — The Cancelling Room — The Counter’s Report — The Bundle in a Box —

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.Awkward Responsibility — “Punching ” Old Dollars — The Funeral of the Dollar— The Burning, Fiery Furnace — The End of the Dollar, .... 326

Chapter XXXIII. The Great Cash-room — The Watch-dog Of The Treasury

No Need for Dirty Money — The Flowers of July — Money Affairs — The Great Cash-Room — Its Marble Glories — A Glance Inside — The Beautiful Walls — A Good Deal of Very Bad Taste — Only Made of Plaster — “The Watch Dog” of the Treasury — The Custodian of the Cash — A Broken-nosed Pitcher — Ink for the Autographs — His Ancient Chair — “ The General ” — “ Crooked, Crotchety, and Great-hearted ” — “ Principles ” and Pantaloons — Below the Surface —

An Unpaintable Face — An Object of Personal Curiosity — Dick and Dolly pay the General a Visit — How the Thing is Done — Getting his Autograph — A Specimen for the Folks at Home — Where the Treasurer Sleeps — Going the Round at Night — Making Assurance Sure — Awakened by a Strong Impression — Sleepless — In the “ Small Hours ” — Finding the Door Open — A Careless Clerk — The Care of Eight Hundred Millions — On the Alert — The Auditors —

The Solicitor’s Office — The Light-House Board — The Coast Survey — Internal Revenue Department, 339

Chapter XXXIV. Woman’s Work In The Departments — What They Do And How They

DO IT.

Women Experts in the Treasury — Their Superiority to Men — Money Burnt in the Chicago Fire— Cases of Valuable Rubbish — Identifying Burnt Greenbacks — The Ashes of the Boston Fire — From the Bottom of the Mississippi — Mrs. Patterson Saves a “Pile” of Money — Money in the Toes of Stockings — In the Stomachs of Men and Beasts — From the Bodies of the Murdered and Drowned — One Hundred and Eighty Women at Work — “ The Broom Brigade ” — Scrubbing the Floors — Stories which Might be Told — Meditating Suicide — The Struggle of Life — How a Thousand Women are Employed — Speaking of Their Characters — Miss Grundy of New York — Women of Business Capacity — A Lady as Big as Two Books ! — A Disgrace to the Nation — Working for Two,

Paid for One — Beaten by a Woman — The Post-Office Department — Folding “Dead Letters” — A Woman Who has Worked Well — “Sorrow Does Not Kill ” — The Patent Office — Changes Which Should be Made, .... 350

Chapter XXXV. Women’s Work In The Treasury — How Appointments Are Made

The Difference Between Men and Women — A Shameful and Disgraceful Fraud — What Two Women Did — Cutting Down the Salaries of Women — The First Woman-Clerk in the Treasury — Taking Her Husband’s Place — The Feminine Tea-Pot — “A Woman can Use Scissors Better than a Man” — Profound Discovery ! — “ She’ll do it Cheaper — Besieged by Women — Scenes of Distress and Trouble — Infamous Intrigues — The Baseness of Certain Senators — Virtue Spattered with Mud — Secret Doings in High Places — Sounding Magnanimous — Passing the Examination — The Irrepressible Masculine Tyrants — Up to the

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Mark, but not Winning — An Alarming Suggestion — Men Versus Women — Tampering with the Scales, 369

Chapter XXXVI. Government Official Life — How Place And Power Are Won

Keeping his Eye Open — The Sweet and Winning Ways of Mr. Parasite — In Office — The Fault of the ‘People” and “ my Friends” — Pulling the Wool over the Eyes of the Innocent — Writing Letters in a Eig Way — The “ Dark

Ways” of Wicked Mr. P A Suspicious Yearning for Private Life — The

Sweets of Office — John Jones is not Encouraged — Post-offices as Plentiful as Blackberries — Receiving Office seekers — Dismissing John — Over-crowded Pastures— John’s Own Private Opinion — Peculiar Impartiality of the Man in Office — What the Successful Man Said — A Certain Kind of Man, and Where He can be Found, 382

Chapter XXXVII. The Dead-letter Office — Its Marvels And Mysteries

The Post-Office — The Postal Service In Early Times — The First Postmaster General— The Present Chief — A Cabinet Minister — The Subordinate Officers — Their Positions and Duties — The Ocean Mail Postal Service — The Contract Office — The Finance Office — The Inspection Office — Complaints and Misdoings— One Hundred and Twenty Years Ago— Franklin Performs Wonderful Works — His Ideas of Speed — Between Boston and Philadelphia in Six Weeks — Dismissed from Office — A New Post-Office System — The Inspector of Dead Letters — Only Seventy-five Offices in the States — Only One Clerk — Government Stages — The Office at Washington — Franklin’s Old Ledger — The Present Number of Post-Offices — The Dead Letter Office — The Ladies Too Much Squeezed — Opening the Dead Letters — Why Certain Persons are Trusted — Three Thousand Thoughtless People — Valuable Letters — Ensuring Correctness— The Property Branch — The Touching Story of the Photographs — The Return Branch — What the Postmaster Says, 383

Chapter Xxxviii. The Department Of The Interior — Uncle Sam’s Domestic Arrange- Ments

Inadequate Accommodation in Heaven — Valuable Documents — In Jeopardy — Talk of Moving the Capital — Concerning Certain Idiots — A Day in the Patent Office — The Inventive Genius of the Country — Division of Indian Affairs — Lands and Railroads — Pensions and Patents — The Superintendent of the Building — The Secretary of the Interior and his Subordinates — Pensions and Their Recipients — Indian Affairs — How the Savages are Treated — Over Twenty-One Million of Dollars Credited to their Little Account — The Census Bureau — A Rather Big Work — The Bureau of Patents — What is a Patent? — A Few Dollars Over — The Use Made of a Certain Brick Building — Cutting Down the Ladies’ Salaries — Making Places for Useful Voters — A Sweet Prayer for Delano’s Welfare, 407