My recollections and reflections

Preface

Perhaps there is nobody in this world who is passing his life without any disappointment. If there were, he must be a fool. On the other hand, if one has nothing but all disappointments, he is still greater a fool. Because this world is not made especially for any certain people. We all had or have some ambition, and the world does not always fulfil our ambitions.

When our ambition is not fulfilled it irritates our sense, and that irritation becomes a solid crystallisation in our minds, which we call “ disappointment.” Therefore those who have no disappointment must have neither ambition nor sense to be irritated. They must be fools no doubt ! But if one meets with some disappointments, each time he ought to get the most valuable thing called “wisdom” in his head. This wisdom would guide him to his ambition, perhaps through patience and perseverance, or by realising

vii his way was wrong, and so taking a new, wiser plan. Only those who cannot get this wisdom will be always disappointed in this world. So you see they must be fools too.

Whenever I had great disappointments I always welcomed them heartily, for 1 knew they were the very source to get the greater wisdom.

Our life is just like the anglers. In those olden times in Japan, the daimyos used to angle in the lakes where many fishes were fed purposely. So it was quite certain that they could catch some fishes. But that was not exciting sport at all. So with our life. If we could fulfil all our wishes exactly as we wanted without trouble, how very dull must be this world I ! Fortunately we are angling in some unknown lakes — even the depth of the lakes we don’t know. Anyhow, we have to throw the bait into one of these lakes. We must do so with our Faith first. Then gradually we are realising the fact whether there are some fishes or not. If there are some large fishes we must keep on our patience until we catch them. But if we ascertain that there is no fish, we must go to another lake at once without delay.

In such a way I have begun to look upon

viii

PREFACE this world, and to-day I feel I have caught some fishes, though they are rather different sorts of fishes than what I was imagining when I started my life. The fishes which I have caught and which I am going to show you now are My Recollections and Reflections, and a few sketches. Especially the sketches are much more inferior than I have been imagining. This is my sincere confession ; but I do not pretend myself and try to conceal all my games.

Those who have made the greater sport may laugh at my small games. I only kneel down before them and beg them to lead me on.

And, on the other hand, there may be many youngsters who are just going to start their sports (or life-voyage). I feel it is my duty to show them all the fishes I angled (no matter how small they may be), in case these may be useful in a way as the references for their future life.

In this book I have so often quoted the names of the ancient Chinese or Japanese. I must explain why. The human life is always almost same in the past, the present, and surely in the future, though there have been some changes materially. For instance, just

IX compare those who used to travel in the sedans and those on the aeroplanes. Is there any difference in their hearts ?

Some of those ancient Chinese understood the humanity so well. We are only repeating the same. That is all.

Of course I myself do not mind to take the examples from the living persons at the present time.

But by doing so, some good people may easily be embarrassed when their own names are mentioned, and some bad people may bring the libel actions against me, which has been severely warned by my publishers.

Therefore, readers, please try to apply those ancient Chinese or Japanese names directly to your own neighbours. I assure you that you can easily find out Confucius, Laotze, Mencius, “ Blue Flies,” or even Judas Iscariot among your surrounding people. Their names are different, their faces are different, but their hearts are the same at anywhere and any time. How many millions have been born and died since the human history began ? And how many millions are actually living in this world ? I am sure I don’t know. But I can classify them into a few stripes less than the numbers of the rain-

PREFACE

bow colours. And how I have been recollecting about them, and how they are reflected upon me? That is what you will read from the next page.

May I quote what my schoolmaster, Mr. linuma, said to me some twenty years ago ?

“ This world is false ; I am afraid you shall be disappointed with it. But in this false world there exists the Truth, almost like the miracles. You shall be lucky if you can find it out, for it will make your whole life perfectly happy.”

I want to add : “ The only key to find out that Truth is our own Faith.”

XI

Contents

I. Friendship 1

II. Hara 18

III. My New Studio 90

Chapter I

Children love chocolate, honey, and syrups. Grown-up people love whisky and soda or champagne. I too love all of them. At the same time I can live without them. Nobody ever said that he loved water. But who could live without it for a single day ? Too many flattering words between friends are chocolate, honey, or syrup to me, and their delicate etiquette may be champagne or soda water. I am neither a god nor a machine, but a human, and I possess the very human flesh.

Therefore I confess that I always jump at the first cup of flattering words or manner of people, and I am delighted with its sweetness and delicacy. But how long could I be buried in it ?

I often slip myself off from a large society reception and come back quite alone and exclaim, “ Oh, give me the pure water, or else I shall be sick soon ! ” What is the pure

A water to me ? It is the real friendship, which I am going to talk about in this chapter.

(By saying that, I do not mean to accuse any of those society people. Who knows, every one of them might have become my real friends. At least, each of them must have certain friends who are quite water to themselves. Only the systems and arrangement of such “ Societies ” prevents the real friend-making. I myself am always open-hearted, and try to make the real friends. But it is absolutely out of place — just like a little salt on the ice-cream ! I feel myself more like a fool or a lunatic.)

Yes, I always compare the genuine friendship with the water. Sometimes we forget the benefits which the water gives to us. Sometimes we are very ungrateful to it. But how earnestly we long for it when we are away from it for only a few hours ! So with friends ! Indeed friendship is the very thing I live for. It can or ought to exist between man and woman as well as among men or women themselves, and I myself have witnessed that happy union of man and woman. But a disaster often happens between the different sexes. For another element, called the sexual love, often comes in too soon before they get to know each other, and that makes them utterly blind.

The other evening a lady author made a 2 humorous speech after a dinner. She said, “ There is a misunderstanding between men and women which we call ‘ love.’ ” She was, of course, joking. But it has more value than mere humour. The words “ husband and wife” or “parent and children” do not always signify the word “ friend.” How happy and lucky must be those who have all their families “ friends ” !

To-day I am writing this chapter mostly about the devoted friendship among men. I see in the English Dictionary that the word “ friend ” is from “ fr^ond,” or “to be loving.”

In the ancient Chinese ideogram there were two words — ho and yu. The ideogram of ho is composed of a repetition of the ideogram “ flesh ” — put side by side. And yu is composed of a repetition of the ideogram “ human ” — intermingled. Now, we Japanese use the two words together, “ hoyu, ” for “ friend.”

Human. The ancient Chinese The modern character yu.” character.^

Flesh. Ho.”

^ Confucius has given a splendid parable about the difference between “ ho ” and “ yu.” “ There was a very filial son. His family

s

In one word, it is the affinity between two humans.

Each atom, every molecule of the same kind always has the “ attraction,” and so with the human heart. It is the law of Nature. Only when some impure elements are existing in our hearts that often prevents the power of attraction. Lucky are those who can easily throw away their mental impurities, such as selfishness, jealousy, suspicions, &c. For they shall have the stronger affinity of friendship.

Even when one has a short journey across the seas, he can make the deeper friendship with someone on board than when he is on the land. For their destination is the same. Then while we are having that long journey of our life, it is quite natural for us to have the friendship with one who has the same destination as ourselves. Struggling together

was very poor. When his father was ill in bed, he used to make nice dishes for the father. The father asked him if there were more dishes ; he always answered, ‘ Yes, I have very much more.’ Then the father would say, ‘ Give the rest to all our friends.’

“There was another filial son, and when his father was ill, he, too, used to make nice dishes. But whenever his father asked him if anything was left, he always answered, ‘ Not much.’ Because this son wanted to give the rest of the dish to his own father next time.”

The former son’s devotion to his father was “ yQ,” or the affinity of the human heart. The latter’s devotion was “ ho,” or the sympathy of the human flesh.

against the tempests and high waves of our life, the affinity of friends is getting stronger and deeper every day.

During that war period in China (between the times of Confucius and Mencius) there were two great friends, Hoshik and Kanchu. Kanchu said, “ When I was poor, I had a business with Hoshik. I took more share of our profits than I ought to have had. He never called me greedy, because he knew I was very poor. When I planned some business .with him, I failed, but he never called me a fool. For he knew the luck does not always follow after the best brain-work. I went to the war, and I retreated three times, but he never called me a coward. For he knew I had a very old mother at that time. When I was a subject of the Prince Kyu, he was defeated and I was prisoned and much insulted. But Hoshik never called me ‘ shameful ’ ! For he knew I never cared for such small insults, as I had a greater ambition in the future. It was my parents who brought me up, but it is Hoshik who knows me ! ”

Hoshik advised the King of Sei to make Kanchu as a Grand Chancellor, and Hoshik himself served under the command of Kanchu. And Kanchu succeeded in making flourish the country of Sei. The nation admired the friendly sympathy of Hoshik more than the wisdom of Kanchu. (From the Shiki, the ancient Chinese History by Shibasen.)

A little later on, China was divided by the seven kings. The King of Jin was very strong, and the other six kings were afraid of him. At this time there were two great speakers called Sojin and Chogi. They both were the scholars of the same school.

Sojin succeeded first, and became the Grand Chancellor of the six kings. He made the strength of the six countries by allying them against the King of Jin. Chogi was still a very poor scholar. Thinking that Sojin was his dear schoolmate, Chogi thought his friend would do something beneficial to him. One day Chogi called upon Sojin. But to his great disappointment Sojin was very cool to Chogi.

The latter thought he would go to the King of Jin, the very enemy of Sojin, and persuade him to break the alliances among the six kings.

Sojin said to his own secretary, “ My friend Chogi is a great man. He is greater than myself. But he is still poor. I was afraid his poverty might make him satisfied with small things. Therefore I have offended him on purpose. Now I know he is going to Jin, my enemy. There he ought to get the highest position. That was my sincere wish for the sake of friendship. However, the King of Jin will not see Chogi if he is so poor. Now you must not tell him that you are my secretary, but go to him and supply him with everything necessary to him.” The secretary took the carriages, horses, and plenty of money, and followed after Chogi. Chogi succeeded to see the King of Jin, who appointed him the Grand Chancellor.

The secretary of Sojin wanted to bid a farewell to Chogi.

Chogi said, “ Through your generosity I have succeeded my ambition. Pray stay with me. I must return your kindness.”

The secretary confessed the truth. “ I, a humble secretary, have done nothing to you. It was all the kindness of my great master Sojin. I must go back and inform my master about your success. He will be delighted.”

Chogi sighed and said, “ Oh, have I been in that kind and thoughtful trap of my friend again ? How could I persuade the King of Jin to attack the six kings for whom my dear friend is working! Go back to your master and tell him, ‘ I, Chogi, shall never interfere your master’s plans as long as he is living.”

Chogi was very true to his words. It was after Sojin’s death that he assisted the King of Jin to break the alliances of the six kings.

In Japan, during the war between White and Red Flags in the twelfth century, there was a famous poet- warrior called Tadanori. He belonged to the Red Flag family, which was defeated by the White Flag. They all were retreating from Kioto, the capital, to the Western boundary. Tadanori joined to the rest of his family, and was running away about seven or eight miles. Suddenly he recollected “ something.” He turned the head of his horse towards Kioto and returned to the house of his poet-friend Toshinari, who belonged to the White Flag. It was such a wet and dreary night, and so very late, too, Toshinari must be sleeping! The poet-warrior knocked and knocked at the gate of his friend. “ Ah, no wonder you do not open your gate I So unfortunately I belong to the Red Flag families, who are the enemy to you. However, listen to me : after we all, the Red Flags, shall be annihilated in the Western Sea, and when the nation will enjoy the peace again, surely you will gather the poetries into a book one day. I have been composing all these poetries lately. I am not afraid of my death, which is imminent every day, but I am grieving to think that all my poetries might be drowned in the sea together with my body. Therefore I have come back to hand all those poetries to you. Pray select some of them in your book.”

Toshinari, hearing this pathetic appeal of his friend, came out to the gate. First he wanted to welcome his poet-friend. But he was afraid it might give some trouble to both of them. So he opened the tiny bamboo gate half-way and stretched out his hand. Tadanori put his papers on it. The kind and sympathetic hand grasped it, and it was withdrawn inside the gate, and the gate was shut again.

“ Oh, how happy am I,” said Tadanori, “ to think my poetries will be immortalised ! ” He rode away as quickly as possible. The poor poet-warrior was killed in the war of the Western Sea a few months later. But his friend was very faithful. When the peace was proclaimed, he published a famous poetry book, in which he put the works of Tadanori, with the note, “ The poet’s name unknown.” In those days they were not allowed to mention the political offenders’ names. But to-day, even the school-children know this poet-warrior’s name. Thus his name was immortalised by his real friend.

Those ancient philosophers like Confucius, 9

Mencius, Laotze, and others had always been seeking the genuine friends not only in their own date, but in the past as well as in the future. The history says Confucius loved the great philosopher Shuko, who was born 500 years before him. And he read “Yeki,” by Shuko, so often that the leather bindings were worn out three times. (In those days the manuscripts were engraved on the pieces of bamboo, which were bound up by the leathers.)

He always quoted the words of the ancient philosophers and good kings who passed away a long time ago, and very often he quoted the words of the very ordinary peasants in his own day. Certainly most of these peasants were quite ignorant and not much worth for the world. Then why did Confucius mention them? Because he was seeking the real friends so earnestly. And if even such ignorant folks just casually departing from the worldly impurity, said somethings which touched his friend-seeking heart, Confucius was always so very pleased.

He must have thought, “ Oh, I am not alone in this world ! ” every time he said, “ How very good and how very true is this saying ! ” Thus Confucius encouraged everybody to have their natural affinity, called Friendship. But, above all, why have all those philosophers left their books behind ? Evidently every one of them was seeking his friends in the further future. And they were absolutely right. They have been meeting with the real friends from time to time in these several thousand long years. Who can help but feel the real genuine friendship by reading those books ?

I^et me now quote a few passages more from those books, which will surely have the affinity with your hearts, if you are away from all the worldly impurity and if you are really seeking the friends.

Laotze said, “ My Tao (doctrine) is the simplest and easiest one, but why don’t the people follow after it ? ” This is just it ! His heart was quite pure. He was spreading out his arm to embrace everybody as his friend. Alas, people had impurity in their hearts, and they lost their affinity and cast away this real human from the dirty and disgusting social circle !

Confucius said, “ If worldly ambition can be attained by work, I don’t mind to be ‘ a man with the whip’ (he meant the driver). If not, I shall rather do what I like best.”

Evidently Confucius was much luckier than myself to be able to say, “ I shall rather do what I like best.” I myself had scrubbed the floor and washed the windows and all sorts of works which were far worse than to be “ a man with the whip.” I did it not to attain all what I wanted, but to save my life from the starvation. However, the words of Confucius were a great encouragement all through my life. The social condition seems to be improving slowly and slowly every day. But there are still many unfair things practised on our daily life. Let us work and try to practise the French national motto, “ Egalite, Fraternite, et Liberte.” Confucius, so friendly with us, was crying out for it some two thousand years ago.

The great orator Sojin (I have already mentioned his name in this chapter) spent all his allowance for studying under Professor Kikok. He went home very poor. His brothers and sisters laughed at him. His brother’s wife said, “We all have been investing our own fortunes in the farming or in commerce, and we are earning 20 per cent. Therefore we are well off. You, young fool, have sent all your share to that nonsensical study. No wonder why you are starving!” They had no sympathy towards the poor young scholar. Sojin was very ashamed of himself. He went away to study more. Nobody bid “ good-bye ” to him. He worked and worked very hard. In a few years’ time, he has become the Grand Chancellor for the six kings. He came back home again in a gorgeous carriage, and hundreds of his servants followed after him in a procession. All his brothers and sisters could hardly lift up their heads. Sojin said, “ Why are you so different to me now ? ” His sister-in-law answered him in a trembling voice, “ A¥hy, thou art so noble and so rich ! ” Sojin sighed and lamented. “ This is only my same self. But, lo ! even my own family and relatives are treating me differently, according to my outward condition. Now I can well imagine how the strangers must be treating the strangers. If I only had two acres of the rice-field last time when I came home, I am sure I would never have become the Grand Chancellor to-day I ” He spread out all his money among the poor. Sojin was such a dear indeed !

Just when I started writing this chapter a friend of mine has sent me dozens of beautiful Darwin tulips. The poor flowers ! The gentle petals seemed in such suffering from the lack of water for some while. I threw my pen on the desk and hurried to put them in a flower vase. At first, those tender stalks seemed as if they were too weary to lift up such large blossoms. They all were drooping by their own weight. But before I finished a few hundred words I looked at them. They had begun to stand up straighter, and every one of them looked so happy. Thank heavens the water saved their lives. I smiled at them, and I loved them. The friendship to our human heart is just like the water to the flowers.

A few years ago one of my John Bulless friends used to live in a flat, and she had a roof garden. It was my pleasure to help her watering that little roof garden. One day I noticed many paper knots tied up on a young Virginian creeper. I asked her what that meant. She told me all the trouble which she was meeting with her family and neighbours. She was much depressed with her lonely, friendless life. “ But,” she said, “ look at this innocent creeper. It is growing every day. You see, I mark its height with the knots every evening, and how nice it is to see it growing ! And I feel perfectly happy when I see those vines are twisting themselves to the bamboo railings. This vine is the only real friend of mine in this world ! ” I thoroughly understood her meaning. She was much suppressed by her surrounding people, and she so badly wanted to grow up freely, and now, seeing the nature was

DARWIN TULIPS.

so natural, she and that vine had such deep affinity. Even the flowers, birds, and animals have some strong affinity to our friend-seeking hearts. And almost all genuine human beings have always made friendship with those natural beings, because their own natures are so simple and sincere and their hearts are touched with the natural beings. But if the human heart can understand the other human heart and touch each other, nothing could be sweeter in this world. Even if we were born in the different period and could not meet each other, we can well enjoy our friendship through the books. But how lucky must be one who has met with his real friend in this world ! And I was really the very luckiest one when I met with my compatriot artist, Bushio Hara, in London. Our friendship was that of water, and not like chocolate or syrup. While we were together, we used to talk just as we liked. Very often we were ungrateful to each other. But how indispensable he was ! I have found it more so than ever since he went back to Japan. Whenever I met with happiness as well as sorrows, or whenever I saw nice views or any subject suitable to paint or any interesting people, something always prompted into my heart, “ Oh, write to Hara.” And every word of mine was responded-to deeply in his heart. I heard more than once that he too said to his friends, “ When I -nvrite to Markino, I always scribble any words handy to me. It is quite all right. He will grasp my meanings ! ” It was just like the champion players of the tennis. Whenever I threw the ball, he was ready to send it back with his racket, and I did the same. No single word of ours was ever thrown on the ground and wasted. I am well proud to compare our friendship with those of the ancient Chinese philosophers, which I have written in the beginning of this chapter. His death on October 28th 1912 was a great shock to me. If I see or think something in my daily life, I often ask to myself, “ Whom shall I tell this now ? ” Hara promised me to come back to London, and so I have been always and always waiting him. I have been keeping many things for him to do.

First of all, I was always wishing that one day he would write a book, about his life, his opinions and impressions on art and life of the East as well as West. Now, hearing of his death, I feel this responsibility has fallen upon me. This is why I am going to write all that I am recollecting about him. But I know it is so poorly done. Onky if he did it while he was alive, it would surely interest the public ever so much more.

One evening Hara and I were going back from the Bolton Studios to our lodgings in Sydney Street. We came out to the Thistle Grove. It was really our ideal. We both shouted out at the same moment, “ Oh, let me sketch ! ” Then Hara said to me, “ Can’t you give me this subject ? ” I said, “ I suppose Art is just like Love. Two men cannot have one girl. I will give her to you, though I am not in less love with this view than you, by any means!” He was delighted. He did a rough pencil sketch, but he could not finish it. Ever since he went to Japan, I often wrote to him, ‘‘ Come back to London. Thistle Grove is still awaiting you ! ” Once he answered me, “ Have you not sketched it yourself yet ? Oh, you most sentimental fellow 1 Y ou know I have only joked at that time 1 ”

However, I could not dare to sketch it. Now, after his death, I have made a sketch as the souvenir of our friendship.

This is why I am inserting this sketch here.

B

Chapter II Hara

It was early autumn of 1905 when I met with Kara at my lodgings in Sydney Street. I have already written (in A Japanese Artist in London) roughly about our first meeting, and also how kind he has been to me.

When he arrived in London he lived in Hampstead. He used to visit me every day, and stayed in my room until midnight. In fact I was struggling against my sheer poverty at the time, so I began to be alarmed. If I spent every day for the conversations with him, what would become of my life ? One night, after he was gone, I wrote him quite gently, “ You know the time is very precious for both of us. Is it not better, for our own sake, to devote all our time for the study, for we could not make out much with our daily dull conversations ? ”

Nevertheless, he came to see me on the very next day, with my letter in his hand. “ Ah, Markino, I am afraid I am annoying you

THISTLE GROVE.

HARA every day, because you are the person to give, and I to receive — always — yes, always to receive some very valuable lessons.” I gave away myself in spite of the difficult circumstances of my hard life, and accepted him heartily, and cancelled my proposal to him. For I knew he was a rare genuine artist. I said to myself, “ Art is universal. If this genuine artist would succeed through me, it is worth to sacrifice my own part. It is not wasting time, after all.”