Works of Samuel Warren

Front matter

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Book The Fifth

CHAP. PAOS

I. Messrs Yahoo and Pitz-Snooks versus Titmouse ; and Gammon

versus them all, 1

II. Tippetiwink ; and Titmouse become a great lion, .... 10

III. The Marquds Gfants-Jaunes de Millefleurs ; and the Reverend Mor-

phine Velvet, 18

IV. Mr Titmouse presented at Court ; after a slight accident to the Earl

of Dreddlington, 26

V. A drop of the golden shower falls on Mr Tag-rag, who receives promotion, 30

VI. Mr Titmouse receives the Earl of Dreddlington and Lady CooUia, thfe Marquis Gants-Jaunes de Millefleurs, Mr Venom Tuft, and Mr

Gammon, at Yatton, 37

VII. Mr Gamnion and the Earl of Dreddlington.— Sapping and Mining, 46 VIII. Lady Cecilia and her three lovers ; with her father's masterly diplomacy in favour of one of them, 63

Book The Sixth

I. Mr Aubrey in the deep waters, where he meets with a companion, 61

II. News from Dr Tatham ; and a communication from Messrs Quirk,

Gammon, and Snap, 78

HI. Mr Gammon in Vivian Street, after the manner of a snake in a dovecote,- 80

IV. Mr Quirf s ootitempl5,ted action fbr breach of promise of marriage ;

and how Mr Titmouse courted the Lady Cecilia, . . . . 87

V. Mr Titmouse stands for the borough of Yatton, but unexpectedly en-

counters a formidable opponent, 94

Book The Seventh

I. The great game at chess, between Mr Gammon and Mr Crafty ; which

typifies an EngUsh election, and how it is lost, and won, . . 105 n. The day of battle arrives, . . . "- 116

III. ■ The fight waxes hot ; and, after surprising fluctuation, a glorious vic-

tory is gained, . 128

IV. Serious incidents for the consideration of the viotois ; who have also

to fight another battl« on new ground, 139

V. Mr Titmouse acquires sudden distinction in the House of Commons, 150 VI. Mr Titmouse becomes a fellow of the Credulous Society, under the

auspices of Dr Diaholus Gander ; performs scientific experiments

in tJie streets at night, and saves the Ministry, .... 157 iv CONTENTS.

CHAP.

Til. Lady Cecilia is married to Mr Titmouse ; and the Earl enters, under Mr Gammon's auspices, on an adventurous career. An affecting

letter of Lady Cecilia TKtmouse, 1°*

VIII. A deadly struggle between a snake and an ape, 176

Book The Eighth

I. Mr Gammon offers Ks hand and heart to Miss Aubrey. An exciting

loTe-Ecene — ^in which Kate behaves with great propriety, . . 188

II. Mr Gammon's skilful manoeuvres to crush Mr Aubrey ; and they seem

seconded by fate, 200

III. Mr Aubrey disregards Gammon's advice, and becomes the guest of

Mr Grab, 210

IV. Mr Gammon's profound strategics, 222

V. Kate communicates a secret told her by Mr Jiammon ; who secures

her brother a night with Mr Vice, 230

VI. Kate's diamond necklace ; Mr Eunnington's munificence ; Lady

Stratton's £15,000 poUcy, which Gammon angles for, . . . 240

Book The Ninth

I. Fortune plays pranks with Titmouse ; the descent of the Vulture ; and

other matters of moment to Gammon, 247

II. The Artificial-Bain Company ev^orates ; and a remarkable scene

between Mr G«.mmon and the Earl of Dreddlington, . . . 254

III. The Earl of Dreddlington's bed-side ; and Gammon's interview with

the Duke of Tant^lan, 267

IV. Lord De la Zouch comes on the scene again ; an Attorney-General's

suggestion ; and Gammon frightened by his own proctor, . , 277 V. Lord De la Zouch with the Aubreys, and Mr Gammon with the Earl

of Dreddlington, whose intellect melts away before him, . . 286

VI. Mr Gammon getting into deep waters, and dragging his great friends

after him, 294

VII. What moles in the Ecclesiastical Court can do under ground ; and

Gammon in a quandary, 301

Book The Tenth

I. Glances of daylight into a glen of fraud, and reptiles seen wriggling

about in alarm, 307

II. What is Gammon to do ? — Mr Titmouse makes an equitable proposal

to Kate Aubrey, 314

III. The scorpion in the fiery circle. Mr Gammon's skilful exit, . . 321

IV. The Earl of Dreddlington's bankruptcy and death ; and Lord Dre-

lincourt appears on the scene, . , 326

V. Mudflint, Woodlouse, and Bloodsuck in a bad way ; and Sir Harka-

wa/s awkward position, 337

VII. Mr Tag-rag's final adventures ; a sudden glimpse of Gammon again :

and the last of Mr Quirk, ' 3gQ

Vm. True nobility ;Yattonitselfagain; and Kate Aubrey's disappearance, 355 Notes and Illustbatiohs, .' 357

■ftir-. ,

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BOOK THE FIFTa

Chapter I

MESSES TAHOO AND FITZ-SNOOKS V. TITMOCSE ; AHD GAMMOH V, THEM ALL.

We must now return to Tatton, where matters had occurred, not unworthy of being recorded. Though Mr Yahoo paid anxious court to Mr Gammon, who was far too much for him in every way, 'twas plain that he dreaded and disliked, as much as he was despised by, that gentleman. Mr Gammon had easily extracted from Titmouse evidence that Yahoo was endeavouring, irom time to time, artfully to set him against his protector, the aforesaid Mr Gammon. This was something; but more than this — ^Yar hoo, a reckless, rollicking villain, was obtaining a growing ascendancy over Titmouse, whom he was rapidly initiating into all kinds of vile habits and practices ; and, in short, completely corrupting him. But, above all, Gammon ascertained that Yahoo had already commenced, with great success, his experiments upon the purse of Titmouse. Before they had been a week at Yatton, down came a splendid billiard-table with its appendages fromLondon, accompanied by a man to fix it — as he did — ^in the library, which he quickly denuded of all traces of its former character ; and here Yahoo,

VOL. U.

Titmouse, and Fitz-Snooks would pass a great deal of their time. Then they would have tables and chairs, with cards, cigars, and brandy-and-water, placed upon the beautiful " soft, smooth-shaven lawn," and sit there playing ecarig, at once pleasantly soothed and stimulated, for half a day together. Then Yahoo got up frequent excursions to Grilston, and even to York ; where, together with his two companions, he had ." great sport," as the newspapers began to intimate with growing frequency and distinctness. Actuated by that execrable licentiousness with reference to the female sex, by which he was peculiarly distinguished, and of which he boasted, he had got into several curious adventures with farmers'girls, and others in the vicinity of Yatton, and even amongst the female members of the establishment at the Hall ; in which latter quarter Fitz-Snooks and Titmouse began to imitate his example. Mr Gammon had, for these and other reasons, conceived a horrid loathing and disgust for the miscreant leader into these enormities ; and, but for certain consequences, would

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have despatched him with as mjich indifference as he would have laid arsenic in the way of ahold voracious rat, or killed a snake. As it was, he secretly caused the Yahoo to experience, on one or two occasions, the effects of his goodwill. Yahoo had offered certain atrocious indignities to the sweetheart of a strapping young farmer ; whose furious complaints coming to Mr Gammon's ears, that gentleman, under a pledge of secresy, gave him two guineas to be on the look-out for Yahoo, and give him the best taste he could of a pair of huge Yorkshire fists. A day or two afterwards, the Satyr fell in with his unsuspected enemy. Yahoo was a strongly-built man, and an excellent bruiser ; but was at first disposed to shirk the fight, on glancing at the prodigious proportions of Hazel, and the fury flaming in his eyes. The instant, however, that he saw the fighting attitude into which poor Hazel had thrown himself, Yahoo smiled, stript and set to. I am sorry to say that it was a good while before Hazel could get a blow at his accomplished opponent ; whom, however, he at length began to wear out. Then he gave the Yahoo a miserable pommeling, to be sure ; and finished by knocking out five of his front teeth, viz. three in the upper, and two in the under jaw — beautifully white and regular they certainly had been; and the loss of them caused him inconceivable afiSic- : tion on the score of his appearance, and also, not a little interfered with the process of cigar-smoking. It would, besides, have debarred him, had he been so disposed, from enlisting as a soldier, inasmuch as he could not bite off the end of his cartridge : wherefore, it would seem, that Hazel had committed the offence of Mayhem.* Mr Gammon condoled heartily with Mr Yahoo, on hearing of the brutal attack which had been made upon him ; and as the assault had not been committed in the presence of a witness.f strongly recommended him to bring an action of trespass vi et armis against Hazel, which Gammon undertook to conduct * See Appendix. t Ibid.

to— a nonsuit. While they were con- ' versing in this friendly way together, it suddenly occurred to Gammon that there was another service which he could render to Mr Yahoo, and with equally strict observaiioe of the injunction, not to let his left hand know what his right hand did ; for he loved the character of a secret benefactor. So he wrote a letter to Snap, whom he knew to have been once treated insolently by Yahoo, desiring him to go to two or three Jew bill-brokers and money-lenders, and ascertain whether they had any paper by them with the name of "Yahoo" upon it: — and in the event of such being discovered, he was to act in the manner pointed out by Gammon. Off went Snap like a shot, on receiving this' letter ; and the first gentleman he applied to, viz. a Mr Suok'em Dby, proved to be possessed of an acceptance of Yahoo's for £200, for which Dry had given only twenty-five pounds on speculation. He readily yielded to Snap's offer, to give him a shy at Mr Yahoo gratia — and put the document into the hands of Snap ; who forthwith delivered it, confidentially, to Swindle Shark, gent., one &c., a little Jew Attorney in Chancery Lane, into whose office (with a due understanding as to the division of profits) the dirtier work of Quirk, Gammon, and Snap was swept — in cases where they did not choose to appear. I wish the mutilated Yahoo could have seen the mouthful of glittering teeth that were displayed by the hungry Jew, on receiving the above commission. His duties, though of a painful, were of a brief and simple description. 'Twas a plain case of JWor«cev..4ccepfeij". The affidavit of debt was sworn the same afternoon ; and within an hour's time afterwards, a thin slip of paper was delivered into the hands of the TJnder- Sheriff of Yorkshire, commandinghim to take the bodyj of Pimp Yahoo, if he should be foundin his bailiwick, and him safely keep — out of harm's way — to enable him to pay £200 debt to Suck'em Dry, and £24, 6s. lOd. <x>stt to Swindle Shark. Down went this X See Appendix.

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little '' infernal machine" to Yorkshire hy that night's post.

Nothing could exceed the astonishment and concern with which Mr Gammon, the evening but one afterwards, on returning to the Hall from a ride to Grilston, heard Titmouse and Fitz-Snooks — deserted beings ! — tell "how, an hour before, two big vulgar fellows, one of them with a slip of paper in his hand, had called at the Hall, asked for the innocent unsuspecting Yahoo, just as he had made an admirable coup — and insisted on his forthwith accompanying them to the house of one of the aforesaid bailiffs, and then on to York Oastle. They had brought a tax-cart with them for his convenience ; and into it, between his two new friends, was forced to get the astounded Yahoo — smoking, as well as he could, a cigar, with some score or two of which he had filled all his pockets, and swearing oaths enough to have lasted the whole neighbourhood for a fortnight at least. Mr Gammon was shocked at the indignity which had been perpetrated, and asked why the villainshad not been kept till he could have been sent for. Then, leaving the melancholy Titmouse and Fitz-Snooks to themselves for a little while, he took a solitary walk in the elm avenue, where — grief has different modes of expressing itself — he relieved his excited feelings by reiterated little bursts of gentle laughter. As soon as the York True Blue had, amongst other intimations of fashionable movements, informed the public that " The Son. Pimp Yahoo" had quitted Yatton Hall for York Castle, where he intended to remain and receive a large party of friends — it was gratifying to see how soon, and in what force, they began to muster and rally round him. "JDetainers" — so that species of visiting cards is called — came fluttering in like snow ; and in short there was no end of the messages of civility and congi-atulatiou which he received from those whom, in the season of his prosperity, he had obliged with his valuable countenance, and cnstom.

Ah me, poor Yahoo, completely done! Ofl is it, in this infernal world of ours, that the best concerted schemes are thus suddenly defeated by the envious and capricious fates ! Thus were thy arms suddenly held back from behind, just as they were encircling as pretty, plump a pigeon as ever nestled in them with pert and playful confidence, to be plucked ! Alas, alas! And didst thou behold the danger to which it was exposed, as it fluttered upward unconsciously into the region where thine affectionate eye detected the keen hawk in deadly poise? Ah me! Oh dear.' What shall I do? What can I say? How vent my grief for the Prematurely

Poor Titmouse was very dull for some little time after the sudden abduction of this bold and brilliant spirit, and spoke of bringing an action, at the suggestion of Fitz-Snooks, against the miscreant who had dared to set the law in motion at Yatton, under the very nose of its lord and master. As soon, however, as Gammon intimated to him that all those who had lent Yahoo money, might now rely upon that gentleman's honour, and whistle back their cash at their leisure. Titmouse burst into a

freat rage; telling Gammon that he, itmouse, had only a day or two before lent Yahoo £150; and that he was a "cursed scamp," who had known, when he borrowed, that he could not repay ; and a Detainer, at the suit "of " Tittlebat Titmouse, JEsq.," was one of the earliest that found its way into the Sheriff's office ; this new creditor becoming one of the bitterest and most relentless against the fallen Yahoo, except, perhaps, Mr Fitz- Snooks. That gentleman having lent the amiable Yahoo no less a sum than thirteen hundred pounds, remained easy all the while, under the impression that certain precious documents called "I.O.U.'s"^ of the aforesaid Yahoo were, as he had always assured him, as good as cash. He was horriljly dismayed on discovering that it was slightly otherwise ; that he was not to be paid before all other creditors, and immediately; so he also sent a special message in the shape of a

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Detainer, backed by a great number of curses.

In process of time Mr Yahoo bethought himself of getting "whitewashed;" but when he came to be inspected, it was considered that he was not properly seasoned ; bo the operation was delayed for two years, under an arbitrary statute, which enacted, "that if it should appear that the said

Srlsoner had contracted any of his ebts fraudulently, or by means of false pretences, or without having had any reasonable or probable expectation, at the time when contracted, of paying the same," &o. &c. &c., "or should be indebted for damages recovered in any action for criminal conversation, or seduction, or for malicious injuries, &c. &c., such prisoner should be discharged as to such debts and damages, so soon only as he should have been in custody at the suit of such creditors for a period or periods not exceeding two years." Such is the odious restraint upon the liberty of the subject, which, at this day, in the nineteenth century, is suffered to disgrace the statute law of England; for, in order to put other Yahoos upon their guard against the cruel and iniquitous designs upon them, I here inform them that the laws under which Mr Yahoo suffered his two years' incarceration (every one of his debts, &c., coming under one or other of the descriptions above-mentioned), are, proh pudor! re-enacted and at this moment in force, and in augmented stringency, as several respectable gentlemen, if you could only get access to them, would tell you.

Yahoo having been thus adroitly disposed of, Mr Gammon had the gratification of finding that mischievous simpleton, Fitz-Snooks, very soon afterwards take his departure. He pined for the pleasures of town, whicai he had money enough, with economy, to enjoy for about three years longer; ^er which he might go abroad, or to the dogs — wherever they were to be found. 'Twas indeed monstrous dull at Yatton; the game which Yahoo had given him a taste for was so strictly preserved there! and the birds so uncommon shy and wild, and strong on the wing! Besides, Gammon's presence was a terrible pressure u^on him ; overawing and benumbing him, in spite of several attempts which he had made, when charged with the requisite quantity of wine, to exhibit an impertinent familiarity, or even defiance.

As soon as poor Titmouse had bade Fitz-Snooks good-by, shaken hands with him, and lost sight of him — Titmouse was at Yatton, alone with Gammon, and felt as if a spell were upon him. — He was completely cowed and prostrate. Yet Gammon laid himself out to the uttermost to please him, and re-assure his drooping spirits. He had got into his head, that the mysterious and dreadful Gammon had, in some deep way or other, been at the bottom of Yahoo's abduction, and of the disappearance of Fitz-Snooks, and would, by-andby, do as much for him! He had no feeling of ownership of Yatton ; but of being, as it were, only tenant-at-will thereof to Mr Gammon I — Whenever he tried to re-assure himself, by repeating that it did not signify — ^for Yatton was his own — and he might do as he liked ; his feelings might be compared to a balloon, which, with the eyes of eager and anxious thousands upon it, yet cannot get inflated sufficiently to rise an inch from the ground. How was it? Mr Gammon s manner towards him was uncommonly respectful ; what else could he wish for ? Yet he would have given a thousand pounds to that gentleman to take himself off, and never show his calm but ■ intolerable face again at Yatton ! It annoyed him, too, more than he could express, to perceive the deference and respect which every one at the Hall manifested towards Mr Gammon. Titmouse would sometimes stamp his foot, when alone, with childish fury on the ground, when he thought of it. When at dinner, and sitting together afterwards, Gammon would rack his invention for jokes and anecdotes to amuse Titmouse—who would certainly give a kmd of laugh; exclaim, "Bravo! Ha,

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ha ! Ton my life ! — capital ! — By Jove ! Most uncommoii good ! you don't say BO?" but it was only tne ghost of a laugh ; and he would go on, drinking glass after glass of wine, or brandy-and-water, and smoking cigar after cigar, till he felt fiiddled and si(^, in which condition he would retire to bed, and leave Gammon, clear and serene in head and temper, to his meditations. When, at length, he broached the subject of their bill — a frightful amount it was ; of the monies advanced by Mr Quirk, for his support for eight or nine months on a liberal scale, and which mounted up to a sum infinitely largerthan could have been supposed; and lastly, of the bond for ten thousand pounds, as the just reward to the firm for their long-continued, anxious, and successful exertions on their client's behalf — Titmouse mustered up aU his resolution, as fn: a last desperate struggle ; swore they were robbing him; and added, with a furious snap of the fingers, " they had better take the estate themselves — allow him a pound aweek, and send him back to Tagrag's." Then he burst into tears, and cried like a child, long and bitterly.

" Well, sir," said Gammon, after remaining silent for some time, looking at Titmouse calmly, but with an expression of face which frightened him out of his wits, "if this is to be really the way in which I am to be treated by you — I, the only real disinterested friend you have in the world, as you have had hundreds of op{)ortunities of ascertaining, if my advice is to be spumed, and my motives are to be suspected ; if your first and deliberate engagements to our firm are to be wantonly broken"

" Ah, but, 'pon my soul, I was humbugged into maMng them," said Titmouse, passionately.

"Why, you litile miscreant!" exclaimed Gammon, starting up in his chair, and gazing at him as if he would have scorched him with his eye, " Do you DARE to say so ? If you have no gratitude — have you lost your memory ? What were you when I dug you out of your filthy hole at Closet Court? Did you not repeatedly go down on your knees to us ? Did you not promise, a thousand times, to do infinitely more than you are now called upon to do? And is this, you insolent —despicable little insect ! — ^is this the return you make us for putting you, a beggar — and very nearly too, an idiot "

" You're most uncommon polite," said Titmouse, suddenly and bitterly.

'■ Silence, sir ! I am in no humour for trifling!" interrupted Gammon sternly. "I say, is this the return you think of mdking us — not only to insult us, but refuse to pay money actually advanced by us to save you from starvation — money, and days and nights, and weeks and months, and many months of intense anxiety, expended in discovering how to put you in possession of a splendid fortune? — Poh! you miserable little trifler! — why should I trouble myself thus? Eemember— remember. Tittlebat Titmouse," continued Gammon in a low tone, and extending towards him threateningly his thm forefinger, "I who made you will, unless you behave yourself, in one day — one single day -—unmake you — ^wiU blow you away like a bit of froth ; you shall never be seen, or heard of, or thought of, except by some small draper whose unhappy shopman you may be ! "

" Ah ! — 'pon my life I Daresay you think I'm most uncommon frightened ! Ah, ha! Monstrous— particular good!" said Titmouse desperately.

Gammon perceived that he trembled in every limb ; and the smile which he tried to throw into his face was so wretched, that, had you seen him at that moment, and considered his position, much and justly as you now despise him, you must have pitied him. " You're always, now, going on in this way! — It's all so likely!" continued he. " Why, 'pon my soul, am not I to be A loed one of these days ? Can you help that ? Can you send a lord behind a draper's counter ? 'Pon my soul, what do you say to that? I like that, uncommon "

" What do I say?" replied Gammon calmly, " why, that I've a great mind to say and do something that would

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make you — would dispose you to — jump head foremost into the first sewer you came near ! "

Titmouse's heart was lying fluttering at his throat.

" Titmouse ! Titmouse ! " continued Gammon, dropping his voice, and speaking in a kind and earnest manner, " if you did hut know the extent to which an accident has placed you in my power ! at this moment in my power r Really I almost tremble myself to think of it ! I feel quite bowed down with the secret which I bear about with me on your behalf, and sometimes think it would he a relief to tell to some one who might share my anxieties and responsibilities on your behalf!" Mr Gammon rose, brought his chamber-candlestick out of the hall — lit it — bade Titmouse good-night, sadly but sternly — and shook him by the hand, adding, " I may rid you of my presence to-morrow morning, Mr Titmouse. I shall leave you to try to enjoy Yatton ! May you find ". truer — a more powerful friend than you will have lost in me ! " Titmouse never shrunk more helplessly under the eye of Mr Gammon than he did at that moment.

"You — you — won't stop and take another drop of brandy-and-water, or what you like, with a poor devil, will you, Mr Gammon ? " he inquired faintly. "It's somehow — most uncommon lonely in this queer, large, old-fashioned "

" No, sir," replied Gammon peremptorily, and withdrew, leaving Titmouse in a state of mingled alarm and anger ; the former, however, predominating.

" By jingo ! " he at length exclaimed with a heavy sigh, after a reverie of about three minutes, gulping down the remainder of his brandy-and-water, " If that same gent, Mr Gammon, a'n't the — the — devil — he must be the best imitation of him that ever I heard tell of!" Here he glanced furtively round the room; then he got a little flustered; rang his bell quickly for his valet, and, followed by him, retired to his dressing-room.

The next morning the storm had entirely blown over. When they met at breakfast, Titmouse, as Gammon had known would be the case, was all submission and respect ; in fact, it was evident that he was thoroughly frightened by what had fallen ii-om Gammon, but infinitely more so by the manner in which he had spoken overnight. That astute gentleman, however, preserved for some little time the haughty air with which he had met Titmouse ; but a few words of the latter, expressing deep regret for what he had said through having drunk too much — poor little soul ! — overnight, and his unqualifyingly submitting to every one of the requisitions which had been insisted on by Mr Gammon — quickly dispersed the cloud settled on his brow, when he entered the breakfast-room.

" Nam, my dear Mr Titmouse," said he graciously, " you show yourself the gentleman I always took you for — and I forget, for ever, all that passed between us, so unpleasantly, last night. I am sure it will never be so again : for now we entirely understand each other?"

" Oh yes — 'pon my life — quite entirely ! '"' replied Titmouse meekly, with a crestfallen air.

Soon after breakfast they adjourned, at Gammon's request, to the billiardroom ; where, though that gentleman knew how to handle a cue, and Titmouse did not, he expressed great admiration for Titmouse's play, and exhibited lively interest in being shown how to get a ball, now and then, into each pocket at one stroke, a masterly manoeuvre in which Titmouse succeeded two or three times, and Gammon not once, during their hour's play. Upon that occasion had occurred the conversation in which Titmouse made the suggestion of which we have already heard, viz. that Gammon should immediately clap the screw upon Aubrey, with a view to squeezing out of him at least sufficient to pay the £10,000 bond, and their bill of costs, immediately; and Titmouse urged Gammon at once to send Aubrey packing after Yahoo to York Castle, as an inducement to an early settlement of the remainder. Gammon, however, assured Mr Titmouse, that

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in all probability Mr Aubrey had not a couple of thousand pounds in the world.

" Well— that will do to begin with," said Titmouse, "and the rest must come, sooner or later — eh, by Jove?"

"Leave him to me, mydear Titmouse, " replied Gammon, smiling ominously, or rather to Mr Quirk — who'll ring him before he's done with him, I warrant you ! But, in the meanwhile, if I work day and night, I will relieve you from this claim of Mr Quirk : for, in fact, I have little or no real interest in the matter."

" You'll take a slapping slice out of the bond, eh ? Aha, Mr Gammon ! — But what were you saying you'd do for me ? "

" I repeat, that I am your only disinterested friend, Mr Titmouse ; I shall never see a hundred pounds of what is going into Mr Quirk's hands ; who, I must say, however," added Gammon with sudden caution, " has richly earned what he's going to get — but — to say the truth, by following mydirections throughout. I was saying, however, that I had hit upon a scheme for ridding you of your difficulties. Though you have only just stepped into your property, and consequently people are very shy of advancing money on mortgage, if you'll only keep quiet, and leave the affair entirely to me, I will undertake to get you a sum of possibly twenty thousand pounds."