Mistress Dorothy Marvin. Being excerpta from the memoirs of Sir Edward Armstrong, Baronet, etc

Front matter

MISTRESS DOROTHY MARVIN [See page 16. "THE HORSEMAN TURNED HALF ROUND IN HIS SADDLE." Mistress Dorothy Marvin Being Excerpta from the Memoirs oy SIR EDJVARD ARMSTRONG, Baronet, of Copeland Hall, in the County of Somerset; Edited into Modern English By J. C. Snaith. London : A. D. Innes & Co., Bedford Street. CONTENTS. CHAPTER PAGE Prologue ... ... ... ... ... ... 1 I. Has some Reference to the Why and Wherefore ... 17 II. The Death of a Soul ... ... ... ... ... 32 III. Chilverley Farm ... ... ... ... ... 42 IV. Treats of a Wayside Venture ... ... ... ... 54 V. Sir Nicholas Marvin ... ... ... ... 65 VI. A Balm for the Cark of Care ... ... ... 75 VII. In which we continue to enjoy the Society of Edward Armstrong, Gentleman ... ... ... ... 84 VIII. High Treason ... ... ... ... ... ... 93 IX. A Perilous Mission ... ... ... ... 99 X. Tends to prove that Saints and Sinners are near Akin 107 XI.

In which my Lord Churchill knits ms Brow ... ... 114 XII. The Swordsman in Homespun ... ... ... 121 XIII. The Man in the Cloak ... ... ... ... 133 XIV. Tobe Hancock .peaks his Mind ... ... ... 145 XV. The Death's Head at the Feast ... ... ... 152 XVI. The Sword of a Titan ... ... ... ... 161 XVII. The Council at Kelston Manor ... "... ... 169 XVIII. The Inconvenience of a Conscience ... ... 178 XIX. Alas! 184 XX. The Counting of the Cost ... ... ... 195 XXI. The Gathering of the Storm ... ... ... ... 205 XXII. The Fugitive ... ... ... ... ... 214 XXIII. The Strange Adventure of the "Goyal" ... ... 222 XXIV. A Lesson in the Lost Art op Managing Womankind 233 XXV. Beati Pacifici 247 XXVI. A Race for Life 264 XXVII. In which we Live and Learn ... ... ... ... 268 XXVIII. The Coming of the King's Men ... ... ...

VI CONTENTS. chapter r.\a__ XXIX. The Death-song of Mars ... ... ... ••• 294 XXX. The Flight over the Hills in the Darknesj ... 297 XXXI. The Valley of the Shadow ... ... ... ... 306 XXXII. The King's Men take the Field again ... ... 312 XXXIII. The Superiority of King's Men ... ... ... 322 XXXIV. Taunton Courthouse : Taunton Jail ... ... 325 XXXV. The Signal of Death 332 XXXVI. The Home-coming ... ... ... ... 337 XXXVII. The Singular Narrative of Peter Whtpple ... ... 345 XXXVIII. The Arrival of William of Orange ... ... 354 XXXIX. The Start for the Wars ... ... ... ... 360 XL. The Great Gathering at Exeter ... ... 373 XLI. The Opening of the Campaign ... ... ... 381 XLII. The Audience ... ... ... ... ... 386 XLIII. The Enemy's Camp ... ... ... ... ... 390 XLIV. The Affair at the Wheat Sheaf, Bugley ... 401 XLV.

Prologue

. New Year's Day in the West dawned cold and wet. A cheerless thaw succeeded a three weeks' frost, and changed a wintry land scajoe of glittering white into one of dripping woods and hedges, blent in sombre harmony with an expanse of uncomfortable mud. Accordingly, when the citizens of Exeter rubbed their eyes in the morning and saw this uninviting sight, much inquiry ensued con cerning the changes of the moon ; and forthwith the New Year was banned. For some were heard to remark " that if this was a thaw, they preferred a frost ; that if this was the New Year, they preferred the Old ; that '87 was bad enough, but '88 was worse, and that they knew mighty well there'd be no luck in the West so long as a Stuart sate king-crowned at Whitehall." Yet towards the hour of noon these frost-bitten pessimists forgot their meteorological grumbles in a more absorbing matter, as they then saw a horseman riding through the narrow cleft of the rich Exe valley at a furious pace towards the city.

At every yard he scattered mud in his track; whilst his horse, a brown sweat-steaming creature, with smoking flanks and blood-red nostrils, bore testimonials of a lightning journey. Ere long the horseman shot through the east gate. It was then seen that the mire of the western roads had ascended above the horse's withers, and had half covered the coat and hat of the rider, — a short, lithe, well knit, apparently youthful man, who kept the saddle with a singular mixture of ease and grace, and rode with a light hand, a loose rein, and a free tongue. Every impediment to rider and horse called forth a curse of the fiercest; not an uncommon thing this, — indeed, politeness alone B would have been so, because tacked on to every anathema was the tremendous announcement — " In the King's name ! " What could it mean ?

Had the nation again gone to war with those schnapp'sswilling Dutchmen ? Had His Majesty sickened and died ? Or was it the Queen-mother ? In less than five minutes the news had spread half over the town that King's Messenger had ridden from London express, and that the bloody-minded papists (whom God confound !) had blown up Parliament House. In the mean time, the courier swerved neither to right nor left, nor abated his reckless speed one whit, but rode straight to the heart of the city, and there drew rein before the door of the mayor's abode. In an instant the rider was out of the saddle, and had tethered the horse to the hook of his worship's shutter. The fortunate few in the vicinity were now able to snatch a closer survey of the illustrious visitor; though their eagerness was baulked in two' particulars.

What the curve of his nose was like, whether elegant or otherwise ; or whether nature had given him two eyes like common folk, these they could not tell. For a large kerchief, tied under his cap at the back of his head, swathed half his face, and completely obscured one eye, and all save the tip of his nose. The messenger executed a fierce tattoo on the most artistic knocker in the parish, which imperative summons was answered by a white-kirtled serving maid. " Wench ! conduct me straightway to your master. I may not sleep, sup, nor tarry till I have clapped eyes upon him. Service of the King ! " " Show the worthy gentleman into the parlour, Betsy," called a loud voice from within. The rider followed the girl through the open door, to an apartment on the left side of the passage, and thereby escaped further stares from the vulgar.

The horseman having discovered blazing logs in the parlour, thankfully sat down on a settle beside them, and stretched his legs fireward. They were encased, as was the fashion of the time, in a strange length of riding boot that enveloped three-fourths of his thighs. Presently the mayor himself entered to receive his visitor. Tho magistrate was a flourishing mercer of the city ; a pietist of more heart than brain, and of more self-esteem thau either. He

PROLOGUE.

. 3 worshipped God with beautiful catholicity, adored his business, feared the King, and had a sablime conceit of civic distinction. In physical endowment, Dame Nature had been somewhat kind, for he claimed a pleasing, pot-bellied rotundity of person, and a floridly pacific countenance. The horseman flashed a glance at the face of his worship, and inquired concisely — " John Bunce, Mayor of Exeter ? " " Sir, I am he," was the reply, and the full-toned pomp of it made the messenger cough. Without more ado the King's man began to fumble with one boot, then inserted a couple of fingers into the top thereof, and deliberately drew from between the leather and his hosen, a piece of parchment, tied with cord, and secured with wax. "John Bunce," said he, "these presents in the name of his most gracious Majesty, King James the Second."

That breath-taking name much affected the mayor. His heart fluttered, his hands trembled, his chest tightened. With twitching fingers he broke the seals, and atop of the regal signature, decked by three unsightly dabs of red, beheld :— " We do hereby desire the presence, at our Palace at Whitehall, this day fortnight, of our leal subject, John Bunce, Mayor of our leal city Exeter, touching matters appertaining to tha well-being of our person, and the welfare of our state." Five minutes went ere the mayor could focus his mind to the mandate ; not that the courier disturbed the awe-struck provincial wits. He laughingly peeped at the magisterial face, saw its verecund blank, and said nothing ; but spread his hands to the warmth, and being a humorous man, grinned at the cat on the hearthstone.

When his worship lowered the missive he gazed at the man by the fire. " Well, Jack Dunce " began that gentleman flippantly. "Bunce, sir; John Bunce." " Oh, well, Bunce or Dunce, it don't much matter ! Thou'rt one or t'other, or both! Now, Jack, my man, what dost make of it ? " "It seems to me," replied his worship, with unspeakable dignity, "that his gracious Majesty requests my presence at Whitehall." " Quite so ! That is a profound remark. Thou'rt certainly wanted at Whitehall. But why ? " "Sir, that I cannot tell." " Tut, John, on wi' the thinking-cap ! Dost suppose he wants to ask whether thy health be sound, whether thy lady hath an angel's temper, and whether thy children are a credit to their parents ? " " H'm — er — no — not exactly — that is to say " " Out with it, man ! " " That is to say, it might be something more important."

" 'Pon my soul, John, thou hast more in that noddle than I thought ! A man of gumption, I see." The mayor bowed. "Perhaps you know Tom Crofter, of Worcester?" King's man inquired. " No, sir, I never had the pleasure of the gentleman's friendship." " Friend, I once served a similar missive upon him. Of course, he obeyed the King's command, and presented himself at White hall. That man came back Sir Thomas." " Gadzooks ! " and something jumped in the mayor's inside. "Now, coz, set thine ear this way, and listen." Master Bunce was blithe in his obedience. The way that dignitary forgot his self-respect, by placing with indecent eagerness his acoustic organ within three inches of the messenger's lips, was a sight to have tickled Ben Jonson, had he but lived to see it. "When His Majesty handed me this document, he said " The courier paused.

" Yes ? " and the mayor grew hot and nervous. "Said he to me " King's man suddenly stopped. An Autolycusian twinkle leapt in his visible eye as he gave his worship a dig in the ribs, and added, his tone strangely melancholic, " Look here, John, it hath been ' spur, and spare not' all the way hither; in fact, such hath been my haste, that I have ne'er tarried for a morsel of food this blessed day. And nature hath just whispered me that, till there's meat within eye-range, the tale must stand untold." " But surely, Master Apparitor, your plight cannot be quite so serious ? " "John, nature never lies." The messenger's voice tailed off to a husky wheeze.

PROLOGUE.

. 5 "Yet, sir " His visitor turned his one black eye towards the ceiling, and laid his hand on his abdomen with a highly pathetic gesture. In desperation the mayor called for Betsy, the maid, bade her lay a repast for the gentleman, and irascibly added, " Be mighty smart about it." Whilst she obeyed, the messenger assumed an air of sphinx like gravity, but cold-bloodedly kept his eye on the fretful magis trate, who paced up and down the room, swearing softly to himself at such singular aggravation. Presently Betsy arrived with some collops of red deer's meat, a mutton pasty, and a salmon cutlet. The recipient of these good things thanked her, took a seat at the table, and made a fine onslaught on the comestibles. He had thought for nothing but the pleasing business of knife and platter, and drove this thriving trade with diligence.

" 'Oons ! " he gasped, his mouth full of venison, "this deer's meat tickles my palate so, I fain would have another serving." "What, another? Come, my friend!" quoth his worship impatiently, excitement at last overcoming the politeness of compulsory hospitality. " Nay, 'tis go, my friend," retorted he of the covered eye, and by way of adding example to precept, cut a huge slice from the pasty, and disposed of it in three bites. Having ministered to the demands of nature, the man from London laid aside the implements of gluttony, and plucked poor Tantalus from the purgatory of hopes deferred. " Jack Dunce, you patient man, methinks King Belly hath ta'en his fill, so shut the door, and come you hither to hearken to my tidings." His worship needed no second invitation. Within ten seconds he had resumed his former attitude of hope, whilst the narrator, having cleared his throat, began in a tone of surprising secrecy.

"Upon the day of my departure, His Blessed Majesty sent word for me to repair to his private apartment. ' Jeremiah,' said he to me (by the way, I should tell you he hath a noble affability towards all his servants), 'Jeremiah, I will thank you to make full use of your ears and eyes upon this journey. You must take particular notice of all matters that come within Master Bunce's jurisdiction, and report fully to me on your return. I may say much depends upon your affirmation. You, Master Harrison, are selected for this mission, because you arc one whom I can rely upon not to let unworthy, dishonest, and ulterior motives influence your statement. Now, I am given to understand that the Mayor of Exeter is a person who might worthily bear three letters before his name; therefore I am despatching a responsible person to learn how he conducts the business of his city.' " " And those were his words ?

" mused the mayor. " Sooth ! they were." The sleek citizen rose, put his hands on his sides, threw out his chest, and cooked np his head an inch higher. Try as he might he could not conceal his pleasure, and the ridiculous picture of delight and dignity united in one and the same individual, set Kings man a-laughing at so brave a display of spontaneous humour. His worship made a circuit of the room. Perchance, as he strutted round and round it, with eyes and chin aloft, deep in the raptures of imagination, he felt, as distinctly as possible, the light tap of King James's sword upon his shoulder, and heard the regal voice exclaim, " Arise, Sir John ! " Soon the prospective knight brought his mind back to more everyday matters, and asked his visitor, with a gush of generosity — " Sir, what will you take to drink ?

" " Let it be schnapps." "I have liquids less homely in my cellar: Madeira, Oporto, and Languedoc ; whilst we broached yestere'en as good a cask of cider as ever travelled from Somerset." " Tut, tut, friend, schnapps is my panacea for all the ills of life, and I'll not desert it. Schnapps and hot water, say I, wi' a modicum o' sugar, a dash o' lemon, and a smack o' spice, will e'er bring comfort to a weary spirit." The mayor again called the maid, and bade her bring forth a flask of his best Schiedam, together with the other accessories mentioned by the apparitor. Master Harriso 1 S'pped liquor in the pauses of conversation with an air of the connoisseur. It may have been by a strange coincidence, or by a latent principle of natural law, that the courier bubbled with genial talk, and embellished it by hot enthusiasm anent the beauties of a coat-of-arms ; by mentioning the abode of the expertest emblazoner of heraldic devices in the kingdom ; and by discoursing at length upon the correct method of kneeling before the King.

PROLOGUE.

. Thc man from London was a brave companion. He thawed the magistrate's dignity by his cheerful humour and his sparkling wit. His pungent jokes kindled a light in his worship's eye ; the beneficence of his one uncovered orb set a mighty hope in his worship's heart. There was such a fine good-fellowship about the man, such a whole-souled joviality, that he raised the glass ten times to his lips, and pledged his host's health on each occasion ; and insisted that the mayor should respond in draughts of cherry brandy. Still one momentous question was for ever on the tip of his worship's tongue, one tremendous thought for ever uppermost in his miud. Soon the good man coughed short and dry, tried to subdue the twitching of his nervous fingers ; tried to keep his anxious features fairly straight.

But veritas prevalebit ; so it must be recorded that Master Bunce blundered head-foremost into the fateful query. " Master Apparitor, I — I trust you are satisfied with this city's affairs, and that your report will be favourable ? " Here his heart failed him ; so his tongue having run suddenly short of speech, he found nought better to do than to look 'red and ridiculous, and inwardly regret the weakness of his head and the strength of cherry brandy. "John Bunce," said the other, in so cold a tone and in so marked a contrast to his former one that it filled his auditor with alarms, "I presume Heavy-Tree Gallows is within thy juris diction ? " " Y — e — s," he stuttered. " Then 'tis good-bye to knighthood," and tho courier hit the table, and set the crockery dancing, whilst a magnificent fire came into his visible eye.

" Say not so, sir ; say not so ! " " But I do say so, sir ! Dost think I wear this rag as an ornament ? " and King's man placed a finger on his bandage. " I — I don't quite understand, sir." " Hark at that now ! John, my man, if thy purse be as heavy as thy understanding, there is yet a chance for that coat-of-arms." "But sir, I — I — I don't quite apprehend." " Poor witling, must I tell the story ? But I'll e'en plemsh my glass ere I begin, for my throttle's as dry as a Godolphin oration. And, brother, you'll drain another dram wi' me, just for the sake o' company." " I— I think not, sir." " Psha, if I cannot have civility, not another word from me, I'll save it for King James, nor shall it be the sweeter for keep." KiDg's man rose and clapped on his hat. Now it was certain that the host's behaviour much pained the gentleman from London, and when his worship's recantation came, as of course it did, so wounded were his feelings, that after due ponderation on the merits of the case, and on the terms of the apology, he said, exquisite grief depicted in his face, " that being by nature a man, soft-hearted, long-suffering, and much prone to the folly of for giveness, he'd overlook John Bunce's scurvy conduct, with the distinct proviso, that he (J. Harrison) should mix the liquor."

Mix it he did ; but it should be observed the compound was concocted of two parts raw spirit to one part water. The tale in itself was short ; yet, despite its brevity, it stuck Master Bunce on a cushion of thorns. " It befell," began King's man impressively, " that this very day I was making all speed hither to deliver His Majesty's letter, when within ten yards of Heavy-Tree Gallows, I was accosted by a prick-eared Jack Presbyter (no true Catholic, I'll swear, would so insult the King's Majesty), who impertinently asked me the time. Being, as I have said, a singularly obliging man, I slackened speed, and pulled out my watch. ' 'Twill be eleven of the clock in two minutes,' said I. ' Pardon,' said he, bending his head nearer my mouth, ' I'm hard of hearing.' But, Holy Virgin ! ere I could conceive the depths of his infamy, with one hand he grabbed the watch (purest gold, studded wi' diamonds, from Doubleday of the Crown and Sceptre, Westminster), and with the other hit me a gallows' blow in the left eye that knocked me heels over head from the saddle.

Mayhap you'll not credit this, but sure as the sun's in the sky, before I might rise, pluck a pistol, or put up a prayer to the saints, the peccant knave was upon me, with two ungodly knees squeezing my vitals. I was half through a yell when he cut it in two by cramming the butt of a barker slap down my throat as far as the voice-box. Quoth he, his laugh very impudent, ' Dear brother, speak not, or I use a little gentle persuasion,' and he cracked out three front teeth with the jar of the iron." The narrator parted his lips : three on the upper jaw were missing.

PROLOGUE.

. 7 " This done," continued the victim, " he set his digits to work. In two minutes he had emptied every pocket on my person, and had relieved me of thirty guineas. In fact, he left me nought of value, save this precious missive, which he failed to discover, for ever since the outrage perpetrated upon me in Maidenhead Thicket ten years agone, I always convey thief tempting articles in my boot. " Now, all this had been performed ere I could gather my senses or lug the weapon from twixt my teeth ; and when at last I was able to do so, the caitiff had wished me a very good morning, and was flying over hedge and ditch in full possession of my worldly wealth. May the devil annex him ! " A babble of high language followed, and under cover of his worship's wrath and mental consternation, at a tale so truly terrible, the courier filled up the parochial glass with neat brandy.

"Oh, sir!" gasped the mayor, a weight of fear upon him, " 'tis terrible news I " " Terrible news ! Strike me purple, 'twill cost a knighthood ! " At this promised calamity the magistrate collapsed into a state of limp inertion, whereat the visitor was so kind as to proffer spirits with which to resuscitate his shattered nerves and intellect. In equity to them both, it should be said, this assisted to soothe his worship's nervous system, and to further befog his thinking faculties. Asked he, at last, his voice thick with brandy and emotion — " Was your assailant a handsome man ? " " Handsome ? Handsome ain't the word ! Ods my life ! twin brother to Apollo." " I presume you mean Apollyon ? " the magistrate corrected ; then drew a sheriff's hand-bill from his doublet, smoothed its creases, and inquired judicially — " Had he a chestnut horse ?

Was he very dark of countenance ; black eyes, straight black hair, smart carriage, comely person, gentleman-like speech, stature five feet six, one inch scar on upper lip, and birth mark on right temple ? " " Jack Dunce, thou hast named the man ! " " Sir,you have met Black Ned, the arrantest knave in Europe ! " " What ! he who robbed my lord Feversham, the King's Com mander, in these parts last fall ? " " The same." " The devil ! " exclaimed King's Messenger in loose-lipped astonishment. The injured man was seized with a spasm of anger, and spluttered a mouthful of epithets. "Pink my soul ! trust a dunderheaded country justice to be cocking over his fire-grate, while every cut-throat unhung grins through his parlour window ! " Master Bunce groaned. " That will not mend it, my friend ! I tell 'ee, 'twill not mend it !

You had best procure a warrant for his apprehension, and a posse to execute it ! " Master Bunce groaned again, and added 'gloomily, " 'Twill but be money and labour thrown away. Times without number he hath tricked the law, and made it the laughing-stock of three counties. He cares not a tinker's damn for justice, nor ever will while the commonalty favour him, shield him, and applaud his villainy. The West hath ne'er seen his match within living memory. He's as clever as Satan, and as artful as sin ! " " Methinks, John Dunce, this is truly discreditable to thee and thy brother justices. By Heaven, I'll acquaint the King ! " " The King ! Oh, don't, I conjure you ! " " Don't, quotha ? Would ye seek to corrupt me, then ? Dost forget His Gracious Majesty's words ere I set forth on this mission?

Said he to me, ' Thou'rt one whom I can rely upon not to let unworthy, dishonest, and ulterior motives influence thy statement.' And, John, you, in the face of those noble words, bid me perjure my soul. You arch-dissembler ! " He smartly slapped his knee, and fairly cowed the mayor with the flash of his baleful eye. "But, please, sir, do not jeopardise my knighthood," pleaded Sir John that was to be. Here the courier's demeanour underwent a startling meta morphosis. In lieu of high looks, a smile appeared as he playfully poked the citizen in the region of the ribs, and said, with a throb of laughter — " Jack Dunce, dear man, I must tell thee that, under certain conditions, Jeremiah Harrison hath an excellent memory for forgetting." The mercer stared amazed at the messenger, and though he strove to fathom the meaning of a hint so broad, he failed, because his brain was too befuddled, to discover its full significance.

"Yes, that's a paradox," laughed the man from London, " and subtle enough for old Sam Butler. I see thy torpid provincial mind doth not fathom its meaning. But I have known a golden

PROLOGUE.

. 9 guinea to cast a spell ere now ; in fact, I once knew one to bo responsible for a lapse of memory." This sample of official rectitude gave a portentous wink ; then fell to whistling a cheerful tune. Precisely at this moment, the bibacions citizen was favoured with a glimmer of penetration. For an instant the cloud rolled back from his dram-befogged brain ; his understanding jumped ; he saw a light ; he grasped a fact ! " The alchemical feat of transmutation Turns base metal into gold ; But that human feat of compensation Turneth base men into bold. Thou fee, that tickles my palm, so willing For thee I'll tell truth ; or e'en tell lie3 Command, thou nimble, silver shilling ! Bid me sing, or pipe mine eyes. Great god Mammon ! tickle ! tickle My rapacious paw. Alack ! my soul is sold, My virtue frail ; my conscience fickle.

Sin ? ab, yes ! But list to the clinlt of ijohl '. His worship did not pause to probe the depths of his visitor's moral obliquity ; nor to analyze his double dealing. " Master Messenger, would twenty guineas be of any service in this matter ? " " Pish ! Dost think I'm a scald attorney, with a conscience like a weather-cock, who'd wipe his feet on his honour for the feel of a six-groat piece ? " "I'll make it thirty, sir." " Thirty, quotha ? 'Pon my soul, John, that magnificent sum for a knighthood ! Why, thou man of generous mind, 'twould not pay for the loss of my self-respect ! " Thereupon they haggled and argued; twisted the controversy into all manner of shapes ; examined the matter from every aspect ; mutually conceded many minor points, and showed a charming generosity one towards another in regard to all side issues.

But on tho main contention, neither budged an inch. They debated, man to man, and made a fair fight of it, with only one stoppage for refreshments. Once, indeed, they tarried to drink. They pledged each other's health, and clinked glasses with a punctilious politeness ; though, next minute, down came the flag of truce, and hostilities began again. And whether it was that King's man's DO o head was middling clear, and that the mayor's was undeniably fuddled ; or whether King's man's gift of rhetoric was finer than that of his worship, may never be known ; yet this much is on record : the courier gained the day, and, on this occasion, the value of a coat of arms was assessed at one hundred guineas. For this sum, cash in advance, he undertook to speak a kind word in His Majesty's ear on his return to Town.

Having clasped hands on the bargain, Master Bunce went in quest of the money. In a short time he returned with a bag of bulk, which he deposited on the table ; and sighed as he did so. " 'Tis a hard bargain ! " The mayor's voice was regretful. "Ay, Sir John," said the other softly, with something of an accent on the title, "it is a hard bargain. Think of my perjured soul." However, for his own part, he preferred to think of the fruits of it. With quick fingers he untied the bag, and carefully turned its contents on to the table. His visage inscrutable and his manner ostentatiously mild, he counted aloud each golden guinea as he dropped it back into the bag. He had reached number ninety-six, when a rattle of hoofs sounded directly under the parlour window. The messenger glanced sharply through it, hastily swept the four remaining coins into their receptacle, tied up the mouth of the bag, and slipped the fingers of his right hand round it.