Smirched

Prologue

A room lighted only by the flickering firelight ; the unlovely room of a London lodging, in which the commonplace would reign supreme but for the striking figure of the woman who stands close to the fireplace with one white jewelled hand outstretched towards the fitful flames ; they light with an occasional glow the heavy folds of the crimson gown she wears, but they hardly reach so far as the other end of the room where, in the deepening shadows, a man stands facing her. A most unequal contest is being waged between them, and even a superficial observer would see at a glance that the man is being worsted, would see it in the whole poise of the woman's slight frame, in the quick, impatient, backward movement of her head, as of one assured of victory, and still more in the triumphant gleam of her dark sparkling eyes.

The man and woman stand quite far apart, and he, leaning against the door, with a harassed goaded ex pression in his blue eyes, looks the last man in the world to cope with any woman in a war of words. He pulls wearily at a thick blonde moustache as he says : ' We have gone over this ground so often, I am sick to death of it. I don't set up for much, but I hope SMIRCHED I am no villain, and if you had a vestige of principle, I should have thrown up the ball long ago. As it is, I do not choose to sacrifice all my prospects merely to gratify your ambition.' ' Then depart in peace,' she answered, with a little mocking laugh, ' and be happy without me.' ' Ah ! there comes in the tug of war, fool that I am ! ' he mutters angrily. ' Yes, fool that you are ! ' she echoes, with a sudden blaze of passion, ' but not half the fool that / should be, if I yielded to your selfish desires.

You taunt me with my want of principle, you find fault with my ambition, yet the least ambitious woman in the world may aim higher than to be any man's cast-off mistress : that I will never be.' 'Better women have been that* ; he sneers, 'even the women of my own family, judging by the histories attached to their portraits, have been somewhat troubled by lawless affections.' ' Really ! but then you see riches and a title cover a multitude of sins ; besides, fortunately for myself, my wickedness is not allied to weakness, and my emotions are entirely under my own control.' ' Ah ! ' he retorted quickly, ' you calculate that if I marry you, my father will get over it in time, and that then you will have done a brilliant stroke of business.' ' I think it possible, certainly, though, from your extremely filial description of him, highly improbable.' ' I tell you, it is not even possible ; if he heard I had married an actress he would cast me off for ever ; therefore, if you are bent upon my ruin, you know how it may best be accomplished/ and he turned hastily, and in anger, to leave the room, but even before he had opened the door, he had repented.

A few hurried steps, and he is stooping over her, SMIRCHED 7 and has caught her hands in his. ' I could not leave you so,' he murmurs in a broken voice. ' Dearest, I knew you could not,' she answers gently, in low tones thrilling with tenderness. She raises her eyes, swimming with tears, to his, and as he bends from his great height, their lips meet, the quarrel is ended, and he is once more as pliant wax in her clever and resolute hands.

Chapter I

' C'est un triste metier que celui de femme.' The women of to-day have successfully proved that the business of their lives need no longer be a weary one, and that nothing is wanted but sufficient intelli gence, and sufficient resolution to render it both in teresting and profitable. If the necessity for labour were the solitary blessing bequeathed by two foolish progenitors to their much-enduring children, never, till the present age have their daughters reaped so large a benefit. And our fin de siecle girls, whilst going in for all those healthy and athletic exercises which are gradually enabling them to tower proudly over a previous generation, may well shake their heads pityingly over their great - grandmothers, patiently working their hideous samplers, and their equally hideous woolwork.

Yet those same great-grandmothers, resting from their intricate labours in blissful unconsciousness of the con tumely now poured upon all that they did, are quite uninjured by our latter day developments. So much cannot be said of the mothers of the girls, for the mothers see no reason why they should be included in the same scornful category. Mrs Grantham was perhaps one of the very least inclined to bear it patiently. She was an intensely SMIRCHED 9 proud and self-reliant woman : she considered her own education quite equal to that of her two daughters, merely different. She spoke French and Italian perfectly, and had some knowledge of German ; if they studied Virgil, she delighted in Dante ; she played brilliantly, she was well up in modern literature and modern politics, and had travelled much when she was a girl, whilst their horizon had been limited to a common-place suburb of London all their lives.

Yet, in spite of her varied experience, and intimate knowledge of men and manners, this irritating couple of High School girls appeared to be gradually de veloping an entire contempt for her opinions which they invariably styled antiquated, and a supreme in difference to her reproofs. She sat by the fire this winter evening in her comfortable arm chair, her feet upon the fender, and one of Mudie's novels on her knees. The story was interesting, but she was hopelessly distracted by her meditations on the short -comings of her two tall daughters. Their very height was an added griev ance ; she had never considered herself short, and her figure had formerly been much admired, but now when she went out with Ella walking on one side of her, and Mildred towering over her on the other, she looked and felt quite small and insignificant, just as their fresh fair faces made hers appear sallow and withered, though she was only forty-nine.

They were so ungrateful too ; she had made great sacrifices to educate them well ; she had kept them at school till they were eighteen, and had gained their Cambridge certificates, so that they might be equal to teaching, and now she heard nothing but lamentations that they had not been able to go to Girton or Newnham, and that they were passed in the race by girls who had no better abilities, yet would SMIRCHED 10 be able to gain honour and success. Even their beauty gave her no pleasure, for though they were unlike each other, they were neither in the least like her ; she knew quite well whom they resembled, and she loved them none the more. Then she prided herself on her good taste, and it was constantly out raged both by the books they read, and the topics they openly discussed. When she remonstrated Ella would merely laugh and exclaim, ' Oh, my dear mother, that is really quite too absurd 1 ' She always thought of them together which was unfair as Ella was the real culprit except in the matter of height, Mildred being an inch taller, but her mother had a shrewd suspicion that her silence gave entire consent to all her sister's speeches, and she was almost less annoyed at Ella's outspokenness than by Mildred's acquiescence.

How she wished they had been two ordinary girls, fond of fancy work, full of small talk, and taking a natural healthy interest in the affairs of their neighbours. She had been noticing them this very evening in particular, and it was a full hour since either had opened her lips. Here she glanced backward over her shoulder at her troublesome two ; there they sat surrounded by books, ugly school books, shabby dic tionaries and piles of ruled paper. One was reading, the other writing rapidly. The light of the lamp, coming softly through the pretty pink silk shade, fell on the two bent heads, brightening Ella's curly hair to gold, and even display ing a few burnished tresses in Mildred's darker locks. ' You are more silent than usual this evening,' Mrs Grantham remarked at last. ' Yes/ said Ella, pushing away her book, ' yes, thank heaven, the power of keeping silent is beginning to SMIRCHED 11 grow upon me at last ; I confess I am naturally garru lous, but by the frequent exercise of a wise self restraint, I hope to become in time as silent as Mildred.' 'You would certainly do well to copy Mildred in many ways/ said her mother severely. ' Oh, I am not so sure about that ; remember the proverb : ' H n'y a pire eau que Veau qui dort.' A fair and tranquil surface is not everything ; you see all my failings float at the top.

I own Mildred would make a charming wife, for the average woman's tongue must be a great trial to any man. But I don't suppose we shall either of us ever be tried in that capacity, do you, Mildred ? ' ' Highly improbable, I think/ said Mildred, without looking up. ' I am sure I haven't the least wish to be married; ' continued Ella meditatively, ' it must be a too detest able bondage. Fancy having all your life ordered and arranged for you right on to the very end. What a maddening idea ! but of course he might die/ she added sotto voce. ' If you cannot talk a little sense, I should go on with your reading/ said her mother sharply. ' I don't see why you are vexed mother or why you should take up arms for the marriage state.

I am sure you have not had a particularly brilliant record, or you would not draw such a thick veil of oblivion over it all/ then in her own mind she added, ' and he did die.' Certainly Ella was more irritating when she talked than when she was silent. ' But I should like to have the chance of saying no/ the girl went on, pursuing her subject with animation. ' Not of course that I should dream of saying no, if he were very rich, but SMIRCHED 12 I should put an extremely high price on my freedom, shouldn't you, Mildred ? ' ' Yes, I value my liberty, certainly, but if I loved him, I don't suppose it would count for much.' 'If you loved him/ echoed Ella, taking this new view of the subject into serious consideration. ' I can not realise loving him, he is ever so much too shadowy and unsubstantial for that ; can you do it, Mildred ? ' Mildred flushed a little as she answered gently, ' I cannot talk any more, I have six exercises to correct, three French and three German, and they are a mass of mistakes.' For Mildred had a very good morning engagement at a large house not far from where the Granthams lived. 'What utter fools your three girls must be/ said Ella, ' I never could stand idiots.' ' I always thought, Ella/ said her mother, ' that you despised any woman whose thoughts ran upon love and marriage ? ' ' Certainly I do, my dear mother, but there are various ways of treating the same subject, and of course I do not despise my own particular way.

Life would not be worth living but for the high estimation in which we all hold our own opinions, our own actions, our own selves : self approbation is the salt of exis tence for everyone, and I do not aim at being singular.' She was silent for a few minutes, carelessly turning over the leaves of her book which was profusely illus trated with every description of brain. ' What an irritating thing it is/ she exclaimed suddenly, ' to think that in the lower races, and even among the ancient Egyptians, the brain capacity of men and women was almost equal. How selfish it was of men to press on alone to a higher intellectual mark leaving to women all humble and ignoble occupations.' SMIRCHED 13 ' What do you term ignoble ? ' asked Mrs Grantham, ' In my opinion, no good woman need desire a nobler avocation than to be a loving wife and devoted mother.' 1 Well, that is charmingly altruistic/ said Ella laughing, ' though by no means the occupation I was refer ring to, and like most folly it defeats its object, because with imperfectly developed brains, women prove un equal to those trials and emergencies of their troubled lives which even the enviable role of wife and mother entails.

Oh, I see them in all ages, a long array of weak and weeping women walking with wavering steps in slippery places and suffering their thankless martyrdom.' Here she sprang from her chair, and kneeling right in front of the fire close to her mother, stretched her large white hands to the blaze. ' Do you know it is a real blessing for you/ she said teasingly, ' to have two such good, handsome, clever girls to be your comfort and your pride, and not one worthless son to plague you. What a pity it is worthless sons can't die out like the woolly rhinoceros for instance, which once roamed these favoured isles. But do you know, I have quite come to the conclusion that, just as it is men who are to blame for women's incapacity, so it is women who are responsible for men's failings. The weak, silly wives of overbearing husbands, the foolish mothers of wild, extravagant sons, the idiotic sisters of idle, selfish brothers, and worse than all, the mad and senseless women who degrade themselves merely to gratify a man's basest passions.' ' That will do, Ella ! ' said her mother angrily, ' your remarks are neither original or refined.' ' Oh, very well, mother dear, as my conversation is not appreciated, and as it is getting late, I will retire to bed, and if I fail to sleep when I get there, and SMIRCHED 14 have to read, and so contrive to set the house on fire, you will only have yourselves to thank.' She sprang to her feet, bestowed on her mother a little careless kiss which lighted on her smooth black hair, hugged her sister in passing, and was soon to be heard running upstairs, singing as she went, and having as usual left all her books and papers for Mildred to clear away.

Chapter II

Poor in the true sense of the word, the Granthams had never been for they had always had enough not only for their necessities, but for many comforts, and for some few pleasures. They lived in a pretty little house in a healthy suburb of London, a place linked by its old buildings to the distant past, and so high above the noisy city that its smoky far-extending arms have failed to enfold it in a stifling covetous embrace, The girls loved the only home they had ever known, perhaps all the more as they had so few things to love. They appeared to have no relations at all, and scarcely any friends ; they had often tried to break down their mother's extraordinary reserve, but had always failed, and had long since desisted. Their father had died when Ella was a baby, and that was all they knew.

They concluded that their mother had been miserable with him, and that his death had been a release Ella was now nineteen, and Mildred twenty-four. Strangers saw a family likeness between them, but their looks really differed as much as their characters. There was nothing intellectual in Ella's sweet and charming face ; the full red lips had an almost childish curve, and the small nose was decidedly tip-tilted ; the colour came and went in her soft round cheeks, and SMIRCHED her blue eyes were generally dancing with merriment, though they would deepen to grey when the girl was angry or carried away by one of her frequent fits of excitement and enthusiasm. People knowing Ella slightly were surprised to hear she lectured on history and literature at the High School where she had been a pupil, but Mildred knew that her young sister's mental powers were far beyond her duties, and that what she herself had acquired by labour, Ella had learned with ease.

Mildred was called beautiful by those who thought Ella merely pretty ; her features were almost classical in their perfection, whilst her excessive pallor made her beauty statuesque. Ella, noticing her sister one summer day when she was wearing a creamy, clinging woollen dress, and remarking the contrast between the soft dark eyes, the little rings of dark hair straying over her white forehead, the fine straight brows and the delicate waxen pallor of her clear skin, exclaimed, ' You remind me of a snowflake, Mildred ; you are so white and silent.' ' Quiet and peaceful/ said Mildred, smiling, ' that will do nicely for me.' ' Oh, I don't know about peaceful/ replied Ella, ever ready to contradict, ' even snowflakes may be driven by the winds of passion, of sorrow, of remorse, and you are dreadfully emotional, Mildred, down in the depths.' ' How do you manage to look so far down, darling ? ' said Mildred, quite undisturbed. ' I look down because I love you so/ answered Ella, impulsively, ' a thousand times better than you love me/ she added, the tears rushing to her blue eyes. ' Oh no, Ella, I am sure we love each other equally, only each according to our different natures.' SMIRCHED 17 'You are capable of loving passionately, Mildred; you mistake yourself, my dearest sister/ she went on a little scornfully, ' and one day you will discover that snow melts quickly in the sun.' But Mildred only thought that Ella was a little out of temper, and then the conversation passed from her mind leaving no impression.

Whilst Ella was still a child, Mildred had supplied to her young sister all the tenderness and pet ting which her soul craved, and she was now re warded by a passionate depth of devotion that seemed sometimes half to trouble the tranquil nature of the older girl. On the day following that little tirade on woman's weakness by which Ella had so much an noyed her mother, Mrs Grantham was far from well. When the girls returned home from their teaching, they found her on the sofa, evidently suffering, and very much depressed. They were not alarmed as she was subject to these attacks ; they had long known that she had pronounced heart disease, and the con stant pressure of her hand to her left side was an action which would always be inseparable from their memory of their mother. But however much she suffered, she never turned to them for sympathy, and it was at times like these that they chiefly regretted the barrier be tween them. ' I wish you would have a doctor, mother dear/ said Ella. ' Oh no, dear, I have the medicine I always take, and he could give me nothing better or indeed so good.' The sofa was drawn up close to the fire; it was a miserable November day, and when the girls had taken off their hats, they brought two light wicker chairs on to the rug, and prepared to do nothing, so that their mother could talk to them freely if she wished.

This B SMIRCHED 18 was so unusual that Mildred thought with a pang how wearisome their long hours of study must have been to her; yet their improved means had enabled her to have many delicacies and indeed luxuries that other wise they could not have afforded. ' There is one thing I want to tell you, Mildred, before I forget it/ said her mother after a short silence, ' if, or rather when anything happens to me, I wish you to write at once to inform Messrs Wickham and Hanson, Gray's Inn; you will find the address in my desk.' ' Yes, mother/ said Mildred quietly, and for a time Mrs Grantham did not speak, then she said hesita tingly. ' And I think I should like to see the clergy man, Mr Wilson, if there is time, of course he has never called as we have never gone to church but they say he is very kind, and I don't want to die just like a heathen.' ' Of course we will send for him gladly,' said Mildred, ' if it would be the least comfort to you.' ' I think it would.

I regret, now that it is too late, that I did not try to bring you both up more re ligiously.' 'Don't trouble about me, mother/ said Ella, 'no training would have made much difference ; it isn't in me.' 'Why should you regret it, mother ? ' asked Mildred, ' if we always try to do right, simply because it is right, surely that is enough without our persuading ourselves that we are positive about things that are quite beyond the reach of human reason. As for religious emotion, that must be a source of weakness — like all the emo tions/ she added after a pause. Ella smiled, and Mrs Grantham replied : 'Religion is the greatest strength in temptation, and the greatest comfort in sickness and sorrow; as SMIRCHED 19 you know little of either, you are hardly able to judge.' ' No doubt it is a comfort/ said Ella, ' if you can only believe in it ; and of course it has been most useful in the past ; a rod for the savage, a leading string for the child, a staff for the morally and physic ally weak, but quite unnecessary for all who have perfect health and strength of mind and body.

Still some races, the Celts for instance, are naturally religious, so are some individuals ; that is when the feelings are easily excited and the reasoning powers are weak ; it is a matter of temperament ; now the German races are naturally sceptical.' ' Really Ella ! ' her mother interrupted angrily, ' it is most annoying to hear a girl of nineteen lay down the law as you do, and I can assure you that I have never in my life seen any religious devotion equal to that of the Catholics of North Germany.' Here fortunately the door opened, and the little maid arrived with the tea; the tea in which the girls de lighted, with pretty embroidered teacloth, and dainty, delicate cups of their own purchasing. Ella consoled herself with the reflection that mother must be better or she could never have got so cross over nothing — enough to bring on palpitations ! thought the girl penitently.

They renounced their beloved books for the whole of that evening, and sat round the fire, trying hard to talk cheerfully on all the most frivolous subjects they could think of. The time seemed endless for they never had any work for an idle moment; at nine it was a pleasant break upon the monotony to hear the postman's knock. Ella rushed to the door but returned disappointed. ' Only a circular/ she said as she threw it on the table. ' What is it ? open it/ said her mother. She tore SMIRCHED 20 off the halfpenny wrapper and read : " Signor Victor Almoni holds morning, afternoon and evening classes at his studio, 5 Belmont Road, High Street. Thorough Instruction is given in Perspective, Geometry, Model Drawing, and every branch of Art. Terms Moderate." Comprehensive at all events/ said Ella. ' Oh, let me look at it, exclaimed Mildred. ' I believe it is just what I want.

I was told to-day of a family, very rich, who are looking out for a governess for the eldest girl after Easter. They will give a high salary but they want good drawing and painting. Now with what I know already, if I had lessons up till Easter, I could just manage it.' ' Wouldn't you like to join too, Ella ? ' asked her mother. ' I ! why, my dear mother, I have not a notion of drawing, or at least such is the peculiar nature of my talent that two of my straight lines would easily en close a space.' 'I don't care about these foreign masters,' said Mrs Grantham, ' but of course it is a class.' ' Of course it is/ said Mildred airily, ' but even if it were not, what then ? '

Chapter III

The next morning, Mrs Grantham appeared to have quite recovered, and late in the afternoon Mildred persuaded Ella to come with her and hunt out Bel mont Terrace, and interview the artist. ' It cannot take us long/ she said, ' and we shall get back just in time for tea.' It had been a cold frosty day, and they walked quickly down the hill with the double intention of keeping warm and returning in haste. The first part of their way was dark and solitary, with trees on each side, and only an occasional lamp. 'I don't think there is anything so exhilarating/ said Mildred, ' as quick exercise on a cold day.' ' Yes, of course, because it helps to bring all your internal machinery into capital order, and that's the only way to be happy and comfortable : mens sana in corpore sano. What lunatics some people are about their health !

I think animal physiology ought to be a compulsory subject in all schools, and then perhaps they wouldn't be quite such idiots : fancy, for instance, the descendant of an anthropoid ape fluctuating between a carriage and an easy-chair, as many stupid women do. Work for the poor, golf for the rich ; two grand panaceas for every physical ill. What was your last remark, Mildred?' SMIRCHED 22 ' Well, I was waiting till you were really driven to take breath, to inquire if you would recommend climbing trees.' ' No, I should not urge that, but an infant on all fours, you know, always takes to the stairs as the nearest possible approach to it.' ' Yes, I know, and to the wall paper as the only available compensation for the long forfeited delights of peeling bark.' They both laughed, then Mildred said, ' Here we are at the High Street — shops, trams, etc., what next ? ' ' Slums next, probably/ replied Ella. ' What nonsense you talk !

As if any one could get pupils without living in a respectable part.' ' Be calm, Mildred, I will protect you, but if you object to searching the slums, ask a policeman. There is a benign, benevolentlooking giant over the way. I will cross and ask for information.' She was soon back, exclaiming, ' So mild and amiable : " Fust to the right, miss, and fust to the left, and there you are." ' Two minutes later, they were in Belmont Terrace. Tall, gloomy-looking houses, which had evidently seen better days, and appeared deeply depressed by the fact that their last state was so much worse than the first. An occasional board with ' House to Let ' proved that the inhabitants were beginning to take flight from the pervading dinginess, whilst many bills with ' Apartments ' testified that the prevalent struggle to make two ends meet was not very successful in this particular neighbourhood.

Although it was nearly dark there were few lighted windows, which seemed to indicate that the inmates lived entirely in the back premises. SMIRCHED 23 ' It certainly doesn't look up to much/ said Mildred ruefully. ' No/ replied Ella, ' but better than I expected, because no successful artist would live in such a neighbourhood. No doubt, like poor Micawber, he is a great Pyramid of Failure.' Having found No. 5 after close inspection of several shabby doors, Mildred pulled a crazy bell, which rang out with a sudden, harsh, and unexpected clangour as if to warn her even at the last moment against entering the house to which the Fates, moved doubt less by a passing spite, had led her. Before long they heard a sound of footsteps, the door opened, and a woman stood facing them. The typical London lodging-house keeper, thought Ella.

A little, shabby, elderly woman, yet as a girl, she might possibly have been pretty ; fair, frizzy hair, extremely untidy, light, shifting eyes, and a worried, querulous expression. She wore a rusty black dress with one or two buttons missing, and held a greasy candlestick in her hand. ' Is Signor Almoni at home ? ' asked Mildred. ' Yes, he is in/ answered the woman shortly, ' if you will come into the studio, I will call him,' They entered, and she led the way down the long narrow dark passage, which even by the feeble light of the candle, they could see was quite disreputably dirty. At the further end hung an old green baize curtain, this she pulled aside, and opening a door beyond, they went in, and she closed it after them. Partly by mere contrast, partly from the sudden transition from darkness to light, the studio looked quite brilliant.