Our Brother Paul. A novel

Chapter I

Both mother and son were persistent in their resolution of sending me home the next day; and certain it was that, either from bodily fatigue or mental excitement, I did begin to feel in sore need of rest. Still it was hard to part from Philip just as we had learned to know the full happiness of being together, and before I had had an oppor tunity of telling him about Paul, or of arranging any plans for the future. I did not expect to see him alone for a VOL. II. B moment before I left; but as I was putting up the few things I had brought with me, in my own room, Mrs. Warden, who had been with her son all the morning, came to me and said that Philip was sitting up, and had expressed a wish for a ten minutes' private interview with me. " It is quite wonderful how much better he seems to-day," she continued, taking the seat I hastened to offer, and looking herself a very fit subject for the doctor's care; "we shall soon have him about again if this progress con tinues."

" The fear will be when he gets about again that he will want to work as hard as ever. Philip is so very ambitious." The mother sighed, as if I had suggested weary thoughts. " We will, however, hope for the best," she said. " This illness may, in the end, be benefi cial. I have heard of delicate constitutions being strengthened by a malady such as he has gone through." " You will both come to Claverton when the weather gets warmer, will you not? I am sure you will need change as much as Philip." " I suppose you and he will settle that be tween you. His great anxiety seems now to finish and sell the pictures he had nearly com pleted when his illness arrested him. I think they have decided merit." " I am sure they have. May I see them before 1 go?" "You must get permission from him. The painting room is locked, even from me."

" Shall I go to him now ?" "Yes, he is expecting you; but do not let him talk too long, Hope. Eest and quiet are as yet so very essential to him." I promised to be reasonable, and not to forgel that I had been his nurse. It did not strike me that Philip was looking either strong or bright as I entered the room, though there was a glad, fond smile to welcome me the moment I appeared. " Come to my mother's chair, love," he said, B as I was preparing to take one much farther off; "I shall regret the sickness that you have charmed away, if it is only as a sick man that you will approach me." I went nearer to him. " And now, Hope, tell me how you dared send that money ?" I was so startled by the abruptness of the question, that I could only blush and look foolish. Presently, however, I said : " You are very bold in your accusations, Mr. Warden.

What proof can you advance of my having sent you any money?" " Your own handwriting, cleverly disguised, but easily made out by eyes to which it was familiar; and it happened to be especially familiar to mine." " To yours ! When did you ever see my writing?" " In a certain railway carriage about eight months ago, when you very prudently warned an elderly lady, who assuredly ought to have known better, against the impropriety of talking to suspicious looking young men in public conveyances." " I never called you suspicious looking, sir, whatever I might have thought. And pray how came you by the paper in question?" " Honestly, I give you my word. That dear old lady, who, from the first, has been such a good friend of mine, dropped your communica tion as she descended from the carriage, and I had reasons of my own for picking it up and keeping it."

" May I venture to enquire what they were, these mighty reasons?" "Yes, I will tell you. They arose simply from a wish to learn a little more than physiog nomy had taught me, of one of my fellow tra vellers. If you believed, as I do, in the science of mesmerism, and the doctrine of human at traction and repulsion, I would tell you even more than this." " Oh, do tell me all, and perhaps I shall become a believer too." " Not you — little practical, sensible, matterof-fact woman that you are. Don't deny these qualities, Hope, for I love them in you, and would not have you a bit more romantic or sen timental for the world. I consider it a far greater triumph to win a heart like yours, than one filled with poetry and day-dreams, and ready to make its hero out of any bit of common clay." " I am grateful for your good opinion , but tell me what you have to tell, nevertheless."

"Well, then, it is just this: that five minutes after we had been in that carriage together, I was conscious of a mysterious attraction towards you, and said to myself, amused, too, at the apparent absurdity of the thing, ' If ever I marry at all, that plain little girl in the corner shall be my wife.' " " You did me too much honour, considering the so evident plainness. Is this all?" " Is it not enough? Must I tell you that I believe this singular attraction on my part to wards you, unconscious as you were of it, became a reacting power, inclining your heart towards me. Must I tell you — will you listen to it, dearest? — how rapidly my love and admi ration grew, how I longed for your sake to have a name and a position in the world, how I railed against the destiny that seemed likely to separate us for ever, because I, a poor man, should never dare to ask you, a comparatively rich woman, to be my wife?

Must I tell you how my proud heart glowed and burned, not with gratitude, but with rage, when I recognised your writing on the envelope that contained the money my poor mother was so thankful for — " Here I stopped him. " It seems to me, Philip, that if you really loved me, as you profess to do, you would not have been pained at accepting a gift, much less a paltry loan from me." " Hope, you are not a man, and therefore can in no wise enter iuto a man's feelings on matters of this kind. Let it suffice that I did suffer acutely at the thought of owing a pecuniary obligation to the woman I loved, and whom I would sain have had owe everything to me. Remember, dear, that at the time we are speaking of, I had not read your heart as I have read it since. I believed it to be slightly interested, but I did not believe, as I believe now, that there is a bond uniting us which destroys all oppressive sense of obligation on either side.

Understand me fully, dearest Hope. I am no longer unhappy at the idea of being your debtor; I feel no sense of degradation in it, because, in giving me your love, you have bestowed on me a far richer gift. This last I can in some measure pay back at once, inasmuch as my love will be to you what yours is to me. The first, too, Hope, I must repay — forgive me, and do not look so grave — before I dare claim the dear hand you have promised me." I was really provoked with him. " Excuse me," I said, " if I tell you that you have been talking a great deal of nonsense, asserting a wise thing one moment, and contra dicting it by a foolish one the next. However, as you sagely observed just now, I am not a man, and cannot be expected to understand these things." " Therefore will you trust in me, my darling?

Ah, Hope, if you knew how precious you are to me, and what I am suffering at the thought of parting from you now, you would be indul gent to what you call my folly." " Philip, I do trust in you, and — and you know I do not want to leave you." The silly tears were there, and would come down. " Do not make it harder for me, dearest. I cannot bear to see you looking so pale and thin — my bonnie, rosy lassie that was, a month ago." I tried to smile through my tears. " You said I was plain just now. Am I so very plain, Philip?" He, too, smiled, and clasped closer and more tenderly the hands he had been holding. " Not to me, love ; to the world at large, I hope you are." B " That is selfish, and like a man ; but I think there are uglier women than myself." "That is vain, and like a woman; but seri ously, you foolish child, I, your artist lover, tell you that you have the beauty which in my eyes is the most attractive of all beauty — that of youth and health and nature's goodness.

If I called you plain it was in contrasting you with Grace, whose rare loveliness must put all less perfect and classical beauty into the shade." " That will do. I don't want another word about myself, or my attractions. If you are content, so am I. Tell me now what you pro pose doing when you are well." " I propose going to London with my pictures, and if you do not object, leaving my mother with you." " You will not come to Claverton yourself." " No, not yet. When I come it must be to carry off my wife for good and all. Our future home shall be wherever you like best, but I should be glad to take you to travel for a little while." "I too should delight in that; but there is poor Gracie, whom I have never left for a day till now. And, Philip, I have much to tell you concerning the shadow I once spoke of that has darkened and is still darkening our lives.

Our time together is cruelly short." " Yes, love, and therefore you shall talk of nothing painful now. I need not tell you that henceforth your sorrows are my sorrows, and your cares my cares. Will this not lighten them a little for you, Hope?" " For me, yes ; but there is still my poor Gracie, who will never permit any human sympathy or love to lighten them for her, and who, I know, will disapprove in her secret heart of my drawing another into our web of trouble and anxiety." " Not when she sees how I love you, dear. Has not this love won over even my mother to my side, and made her entreat you to become her daughter after all ?" " She is kind and friendly now, Philip ; but she does not cordially like me." " She does, Hope. She recognizes the strength and devotedness of your character; and if you could be persuaded to embrace Calvinism, she would give you her whole noble heart, for it is a noble one, in spite of the somewhat hard rind that surrounds it."

" I know it — I have seen it — and from my very soul, Philip, I respect your mother, and the religion she professes. I shall be pleased to have her with us, both now, and — " " Finish your sentence, dearest; you blush and tremble as if you were going to say a very dreadful thing." " When we have a home together then — but I have already stayed too long, and must make haste to say good bye." " And how shall I thank you for all you have done for me, Hope — how shall I make my heart speak for me?" " You shall not thank me at all, for I have done nothing that was not a pleasure to myself." " Which instead of lessening increases the obligation; but I will not thank you, for all words would be cold and lifeless to what I feel. We shall write to each other, love, and thus for get in some measure that we are apart.

Those tears again, Hope; I thought you were the strongest and bravest little woman in the world." "Good bye, Philip; I shall be strong and brave presently." " May God bless and preserve my darling, my wife, till we meet again ! One kiss, love, to keep sacred in my heart while we are far from each other; to give me the assurance, when such joy shall seem impossible, that you do really and truly love me." I kissed him, sobbing out my grief a moment in his arms, and then we parted.

Chapter II

I had quite forgotten to ask Philip's permission to see his paintings, and not deeming it wise for either of our sakes to repeat the farewell scene, I begged his mother to make the petition for me, as I had a better reason than mere curiosity for desiring admittance to the studio. She had shaken her head on seeing my tear stained face as I came from Philip's room. She shook it still more gravely on returning from the errand I had charged her with. "Poor foolish children!" she exclaimed, sighing almost bitterly; " if you bear so ill this passing sadness, how will you meet the real, positive troubles of the life that is before you ?" I would neither justify nor discuss the passing sadness, as she called it, so I only said : " Have you obtained the key ?" " Oh, yes ; you can follow me at once, if you choose."

"I can go alone, can I not? Why should you have the fatigue of mounting the stairs?" " Because I, too, desire to look upon my son's work. I have not made over all my interest in him yet. Mothers, you know, are ever exacting and unreasonable." I fancied she had been chafed at seeing what Philip suffered in parting from me; and the cause, mollifying the effect, I took no notice of the sharpness of her tones, but ran quickly in advance of ray conductress up the narrow stairs. She joined me presently, quite pale and out of breath. " It is too much for you, indeed it is," I ex claimed, passing my arm round her waist as she leaned against the banisters. " I wish you had allowed me to come alone." A tear was in her eye; and slowly, very slowly, as if some strong mental effort were re sisting its progress, it rolled down the white face.

"I am still weak, Hope," she said, giving me the key of the room, " and should no doubt have been better down stairs, but in a little time your right in all things appertaining to Philip will be prior to mine, and so I cling foolishly — perhaps sinfully — to the shadow of authority that yet remains to me. Let us go in." The room was full of paintings; many of them apparently only just commenced, scarcely any of them in a state of completion, but all speaking most plainly and painfully to my mind of weary labour and haste, that left genius scant opportunity of asserting itself, and betokened rather an artist's human trials than the aspirations of an artist soul. " Ah," I said, " he will do far better than this by-and-bye. It would be a shame, indeed, is such talent had to be expended cent, by cent. for daily bread.

Henceforth, Philip must paint for fame — only I hope when it comes, he will not love it above everything else." " All human idols poison the soul," replied the mother, with a significance that the dullest must have understood ; " and the wife who truly cares for her husband in the highest sense, will faithfully endeavour to keep him from this poison in any of its forms." I thought her unkind to speak in this way to me at such a moment. It had been so different while Philip's life was in danger; and after all, it was scarcely my fault that he loved me, or a very heinous crime to love him in return. Still I felt that if my future mother was to be gained at all, it must be by the exercise of patience and forbearance, rather than by the use of those weapons which I could certainly have handled better at that time.

So I said only : "I hope that some dozen years hence if our lives are spared, you will be able conscientiously to number me amongst those women who have truly cared for their husbands." And Mrs. Warden shortly answered : " I fervently hope so too." But my object in gaining admission to the studio, was not to harrow up my feelings by gazing at poor Philip's unfinished "oictures (I had no vocation for the sentimental in any shape), but to find out one amongst them that was suf ficiently attractive and meritorious to give me an excuse for purchasing it in my own and my sister's names. I knew that they would want money badly enough by and bye, and Philip had convinced me that I should never dare on a future occasion have recourse to my first clumsy method of supplying them. He would go to London and slave himself to death, and have all the recent misery to pass through again, if something was not done to give him a temporary independence, and prevent the daily, stated task from becoming an absolute necessity.

My plan, therefore was to purchase one good picture, and to carry two or three away with me, on the chance of finding purchasers amongst Grace's new acquaintances at Claverton. Even to the mother I felt a little reluctance in mentioning my project, because I believed that her pride, but for her religion, would have far exceeded that of her son ; and also that she would consider it a peculiar trial to accept an obligation from me — the unloved, unwished for daughter, whom, for the dear one's sake alone, she had stooped to woo. But as the thing had to be done, I did it in the best way I could. I examined, or appeared to examine every completed painting in the room very attentively, and at last I stopped before Mrs. Warden's own portrait, and told her I wished to buy it for Grace and myself. " You know," I said, speaking a little quickly and nervously, "it will not be like depriving Philip of it, for if Grace chooses to keep it by and bye when we separate, he can always make a copy for ourselves.

It is, I am aware, a valuable picture, for he told me how long he was about it, and I am sure fifty guineas will be very cheap for it. May it be packed and sent to us this week, with all the other finished pictures he has, and for which I shall try and find purchasers at Claverton." The mother sat thinking for a minute or two, looking from me to the portrait and from the portrait to me again. Strong agitation of some kind was working in her grief-stained face. I did not know whether it was peace or war that I had to expect. I believe there was a fierce struggle going on in the heart that was so jealously veiled from me, but if so the i.Lubat was brief. She rose, and with her now feeble steps came towards the place where I was standing. She did not embrace me, but laid her two hands lightly on ray shoulders, while, red and pale by turns, I looked and listened for what was coming.

It was not much (except in the way of sug gestion) after all. " Hope," she said, " I never thought that you would be chosen to teach me a lesson, but you are doing so unconsciously now. Have your own way, my daughter, and forgive the peevish ness of a sick old woman, whom even grace has not cured of the hard faults of her nature." I kissed her reverently — she was so grand in her humiliation — and half an hour later, we parted the best friends in the world.

Chapter III

Although I had heard pretty regularly from home during my short absence, I knew, in fact, very little of what had been going on there since my departure, for both Grace and Mrs. Winterblossom had believed me too engrossed with the anxieties and duties of my own posi tion, to care for any unnecessary details con cerning theirs. That Colonel Seaforth had recovered his injuries, and was daily expected to be well enough to remove to Claverton Court, was the only fact of any importance that I had gathered from their letters; and in spite of what it had cost me to leave Philip, my heart beat with pleasurable anticipation at the thought of being once more with my darling Gracie, and of listening to all the simple home news over our cheerful evening fire. As I had not had time to apprise them of my coming, there was nobody at the station to meet me; and wearying to reach my destination, I took one of the waiting conveyances, and was driven rapidly home.

The ladies had just sat down to tea by the little remnant of daylight, when, unannounced, I presented myself before them, causing Mrs. Winterblossom to cut her finger with the knife she was holding, and Gracie to overturn her chair in her eagerness to embrace and welcome me back. How good and pleasant it seemed to be with them again, and how doubly good and pleasant to have cheering news to tell and hear! I thought Gracie looked as if her sick-room duties had tired her more than mine, for when the flush of joy my arrival had excited, quite left her face, I noticed with anxiety that it was pale and careworn; and I said I was afraid Colonel Seaforth had proved a sad tax to her. She smiled and shook her head, but did not appear much disposed to talk about herself or her patient, while it was evident that Mrs. Win terblossom, but for the attractions of the tea table, would have been able amply to atone for my sister's reticence in the matter.

I knew the dear old lady would empty her budget of gossip willingly the instant we were alone, and just at present I liked talking to Gracie on any subject she might choose, better than listening to the most interesting intelligence from other lips. Of course I had soon told all of my own story that I intended to make public. The in formation concerning Mrs. Warden's intended visit, during her son's absence in London, gave my sister manifest pleasure, and somewhat re conciled me to the rueful looks of poor Mrs. Winterblossom, whose merry face became suddenly overcast like a bright sun that a dark cloud abruptly hides from our view. Truly it would need all ray skill and diplomacy to keep anything like peace between these two antagonistic natures. But to change the subject, and to bring back the dear woman's smiles, I enquired about the family at the Manor, and particularly as to how far the intimacy between Grace and themselves had progressed.

" I have spent one whole day there," said my sister, brightening visibly at the mention of her new friends; "and almost every fine day Lady Tyrrel comes to take me for a drive. You, too, must know them, dear Hope; it is altogether a charming family." " Then this Colonel has done you some good, after all. When is he going away?" " To-morrow, I hope," replied ray sister with alacrity. " But for his lameness, indeed, he might have gone long ago." " Was his leg hurt, then, by the fall?" " Yes, very severely, though no one discovered it at first. He can only walk now with the aid VOL. II. c of crutches, and his longest journey has been to this room from his own." " He does not have his meals with you?" "No; I have never asked him to do so. Except as his nurse, I have nothing to do with him. As a guest, he would be difficult to en tertain."

Mrs. Winterblossom having finished her tea, here eagerly put in : " I am sure, Miss Grace, he is a very accom plished gentleman, and would gladly entertain you, if you would let him." " Accomplished gentlemen would be more likely to tire than to entertain me," said my sister quietly. And I fancied Mrs. Winterblossom's little mouth assumed an expression of slight impa tience at the remark. We had just rung the bell for the tea-things to be removed, and were going to draw our chairs round the cosy fire, when a rapid stump, stump, was heard in the passage, which connect ing with a look of vexation on Grace's serene countenance, I understood to herald the approach of the gentleman we had been talking about. " Here he is, I declare," said Mrs. Winter blossom, with amusing animation, and instinc tively smoothing down the folds of her silk dress as she spoke ; " I daresay he has heard of Miss Hope's return, and is come to pay his respects to her."

" Come in," said Gracie gently, in answer to a low knock at the door. And the next moment the man and his crutches were within the room, and waiting per mission to join our circle. In her capacity of nurse my sister immediately rose and offered an easy chair to the invalid, taking his crutches from him, and otherwise waiting upon him, as she would have waited, and often did wait, upon the oldest and most infirm men and women in the parish. One look into the gallant Colonel's face as he submitted to these gentle, though mechanical attentions, convinced me that he estimated them C at a very different price from any Gracie herself would have put upon them. " This is my sister," she said, as soon as the object of her care was thoroughly settled, " and Hope dear, I need scarcely mention to you Colonel Seaforth in the way of a formal intro duction."

He bowed with courtly ease, and after looking at me attentively, though not rudely, for a second or two, and shaking hands with Mrs. Winterblossom, who had approached him for that purpose, addressed himself to Grace. " This is the last evening," he said, in a very melancholy tone, " and therefore I trust you will allow me to spend it in your society. I shall be very good and quiet, and will not utter a single word if it disturbs you. Nothing would afford me greater pleasure than to sit here, for gotten or unnoticed, and listen to the conversation of your delightful circle." "I am afraid," said my sister, "you will find us less amusing than you are polite enough to imagine; but of course we can neither of us have any objection to your remaining if you like it." " I do like it very much, indeed," he replied, with a smile that I suppose my sister's blunt ness had excited, " for independently of other reasons, I am anxious to make the acquaintance of this new member of your family, and to ex press to you both together that undying gratitude for the hospitality your goodness has extended to a poor sick stranger, that weighs at present almost too heavily upon my heart."

" It need not," said Grace simply, ''• for we have done no more for you than we should have done for any other suffering creature accidentally or providentially thrown upon our care. Pray don't talk about it." " I am silent, then, and must leave it to time to convince your sister and yourself of the depth and sincerity of my feeling in this matter • — a little one to you, Miss Compton, but a very great and important one to me." Grace made no reply to this, but fetched her work from a side table; and the lamp having just come in, she showed symptoms of being in d very industrious mood indeed. Clearly if Colonel Seaforth was to be enter tained that evening, the task of entertaining him must devolve on Mrs. Winterblossom or myself. I thought that it belonged of right to me, and would willingly have made the effort could I have guessed what subject was likely to interest him ; but my companions had as yet told me so little about him, that I was quite at a loss how to play the agreeable hostess, and the gentleman himself appeared by no means disposed to assist me by suggesting a topic of conversation.

Could I have said to him, " Is not my sister Grace a lovely, precious darling?" I doubted not there would have been immediate sympathy between us, but as this would have been de cidedly incorrect, I rejected all idea of such an opening, and falling back desperately upon my English instincts, remarked abruptly that it had been a fine day. The Colonel smiled and answered that he believed it had; and there seemed a chance of my last resource proving a miserable failure, as having replied to me, the man's eyes again wandered to where Grace sat sewing, and his whole attention was absorbed in contemplating that graceful and unconscious figure. As well might he have gazed at Venus shining in the skies, and sought to lure that brilliant planet down to him. " Are you an artist, Colonel Seaforth?" I said, making another laudable attempt to amuse him.