'Nisida'; or, Two winters in Madeira

Chapter I

'Tis the voice of the sluggard, I heard him complain, You awoke me too soon, I must slumber again. Dn. Watts. Who likes getting up early ? If the question were answered honestly, what confessions would there be on the subject ? I think the majority would admit that it requires an effort to " shake off dull sloth and early rise ; " that it is a trial to rouse oneself from " the gay romance of waking dreams " to the dull routine of ordinary life. When one has accomplished the feat of rising early on a lovely spring morning, one is full of self-complacency, and acknowledges the fact that the poets are right — that nature is more beautiful, and the air more balmy than at any other hour of the day ; and good resolutions — alas ! too often broken — are hastily made for the future. But when rising early involves the quitting a warm bed for a chilly bath and toilet on a raw and foggy November morning, the self-approbation merges into a martyr-like feeling of stern fortitude !

Such was the experience of Nisida Ashton, as on a dark cold morning towards the middle of November, she was awakened at seven o'clock by a bustling housemaid entering B her room, placing near her washing-stand, with a noisy bang, a can of hot and another of cold water — lighting her candle, and after informing her it was seven o'clock and a bitter morning, making her exit, noisily slamming the door after her. This last action, which shook the room and jingled the bottles on the dressing-table, touched a discordant string in poor Nisida's frame, particularly when, on slowly raising herself into a sitting posture, she perceived the lid of the hot-water can had been carelessly left open — which she knew, had it been a warm morning (such is the perversity of human nature), would have been carefully closed, and a towel wrapped round it as an extra precaution to keep it hot.

These little grievances tended to make her begin her day out of tune with herself and the world in general ; and tike proceeded slowly with her dressing, her fingers stiff with chilblains and aching with the cold. But when towards the completion of her toilet, she saw on the centre table what she had not perceived before — a letter directed to herself, a small feeling of pleasurable excitement ran through her veins, making her for the moment quite warm, — especially, when, on taking up the letter, she saw it was in a haridwritiug quite unknown to her! Nisida, to whom it is time to introduce our readers more formally, was of about eighteen years of age, of middle height, and, as she was beginning to get stout, it was generally considered she would not grow any more — she was neither dark nor fair, had large dark grey eyes, lightish hair with an auburn tinge iD it — a complexion almost colourless except when unusually excited, and* a faulty mouth.

Many people called her plain— most called her un interesting — some few called her intelligent-looking, but no one ever called her pretty ; — and this poor Nisida knew full well ; she was painfully conscious of her defects, and a sense of her deficieuces often made her shy and awkward iu society, and gave a dissatisfied expression to her face, which was sometimes increased by a feeling of jealousy of a younger sister — a handsome little girl of eleven years of age, and of whom she often heard the aside, that she would be the pretty Miss Ashton, and was to grow up the belle of the family ! A boy came between the two sisters, who was now at school. Another boy, of about nine years, was a cripple from a hopeless spine complaint, and two other girls, the younger not more than four, completed the family.

Her father, Major Ashton, had retired from the army in middle life, but shortly after, the failure of a bank having greatly crippled his means, he entered a mercantile house in a pro vincial town, which, being a prosperous concern, brought him, to a certain extent, the needful for the increasing expenses of his family. For them he took a house in the country, a few miles off from his seat of business ; but, with the exception of Sundays, he had not much time to devote to the enjoyment of their society, as he left immediately after an eight o'clock breakfast, and did not return till six in the evening. Mrs. Ashton, some few years his junior, was, in many respects, a good help-meet for him. It was her wish to make his home happy and comfortable, but she was " careful and troubled about many things," and the care worn expression of her face showed that life had not beeu to her a smooth and easy journey.

Real sorrow that she had passed through had set its mark upon her brow — but a certain fretful expression of countenance, spoke of every day worries, not taken in the patient, trustful spirit of one who feels that the trials and sorrows of this earthly life are, if rightly taken, an education for a higher, purer existence, where they are no longer needed. There was not much confidence between her and her eldest daughter, who had beeu chiefly educated at school, and who had now returned home with the prospect of making herself useful, b and assisting the governess in teaching her younger brother and sisters, while she herself was to have the advantage of music and drawing-masters in the town' of Helston. Now Nisida knew that her mother was disappointed in her, and she knew also that she was proud of and expected great things from her sister Florence, and this knowledge caused an antagonistic feeling to spring up within her, made her often resent slights that were not really intended, and often caused her home life to be wearisome and distasteful to her, while the stiffness aud reserve between herself and her mother increased daily.

Both knew that things were not as they should be, and were vexed at the results; — but each laid the blame on the other, and never paused to ask herself if a more conciliatory manner on her part would not have allayed what was almost growing into strife between them. If the mother had had more insight into character, she would have seen that more trust and occasional commend ation on her side, instead of constant reproof and fault finding, would have aroused the dormant affection and real good feeling in Nisida's character, and the listless, un interesting girl would have been converted into the dutiful and devoted daughter ; and on the other hand Nisida should have taken into consideration the cares and anxieties of her mother — in which she had no share ; the suffering, helpless state of her invalid brother ; the struggles to keep up appearances, in spite of limited means, and the daily dis comfort of a household just underserved with regard to ser vants, when the one more, that could not he afforded, would have altered the whole state of affairs, and made every one comfortable !

But we must return to the mysterious letter, which Nisida still holds unread iu her hand. At last she tears it open, and hastily scans the contents ; it is an invitation from her godmother, Lady Arabella Moore, who is a cousin of her father's, whom she has never seen ; and the purport of the proposal is that she should come and spend a fortnight at Deerhurst Park (the country house of the Moores) and make acquaintance with her cousins, who were then all at home. A thousand thoughts passed through Nisida's mind as she read and re-read the letter; she had often heard of Deerhurst as a place full of enjoyment, excitement, and gaiety; some of her school-fellows had stayed there, and spoken of the grand style of the entertainments, and of the beauty and fashion of Lady Arabella and her daughters, and Nisida had often felt chagrined, that she, though a cousin, had no knowledge of the place; but now she had really been asked in a cordial manner, her parents could not object, and it would only be too delightful.

The one cloud that over shadowed her radiant prospect, was the thought of a befitting toilet, and as to how she could appear properly arrayed amongst her gay and fashionable cousins; all this would in volve grave consideration, and with these thoughts weighing on her mind she descended the stairs to breakfast. She was so happy that she hardly felt annoyed at the sharp reproof from her mother for being late, or the colder manner than usual of her father's greeting, which was generally a sign of matters not going smoothly at his seat of business. After making the breakfast, she told them of her invita tion, and gave the letter to her mother to read, who entered as cordially as she could desire into her prospects, aud, in anticipation of the advantages to the family in general, which an intimate intercourse with Deerhurst must produce, showed more interest in Nisida's pleasure than the latter could have expected, but could any one have seen into the hidden recesses of her heart, a lurking wish would have been discovered, that Nisida and Florence might have changed places, as the pretty, lively younger daughter would have been a far better specimen of her family than the elder one ; however, there was no knowing that the invitation might not be extended at some future time to the younger members of the family, so that altogether her feeling was one of great satisfaction, and she was deter mined to promote the intercourse between the two families by every means that lay in her power.

Her father was not so well pleased, and feared he should have to ask her cousins, and return the civilities in a way he could not well afford; besides, he knew that "the Cedars" (the name of his country villa) could not possess the same attractions for young people as Deerhurst Park, so he would rather they did not come to see the poverty of the land; but Mrs. Ashton met these objections with many arguments; it was no good to anticipate evil, and the bad health of their little boy was quite sufficient excuse at present, to prevent having young people in the house; she had often made it an excuse before, so it would be only consistent to make use of it in this case. Mr. Ashton acquiesced, though he did not look convinced, but his wife had a long tongue, which generally triumphed in the end in these matrimonial disputes, and as long as she gained her point she did not care how much she had ruffled her husband's temper ; there was no deny ing she had done so in this instance, for he rose from the breakfast-table in an angry manner, venting his annoyance on the poor little Skye terrier who had been for the last five minutes begging and making various efforts to attract his master's attention for his accustomed hone, or mouthful of meat, and who was greatly astonished at the violent kick he received instead, which sent him howling to a remote part of the room, there to meditate on the inconstancy of human nature !

The toilet of Nisida was a subject of momentous con sideration for her and her mother; but the result of a day's shopping in the town of Helston was not quite satisfactory to the former; Mrs. Ashton had not good taste, and the things she chose were neither pretty nor becoming; then the dress-maker, who was not first-rate, was another trial to Nisida, for she seemed to fix on patterns, declaring them to be the newest style, that made her figure look stouter and more awkward than usual ; but still, as her mother said it was a great thing to be in the fashion, and, going out so little into society as they did, it was impossible for them to know, so it was best to leave all to the dress-maker; and the latter had certainly declared that Lady Mary Keith's maid had told her, her lady had had a dress made precisely that pattern, and had called it stylish, so poor Nisida was fain to be content.

She had about ten days to prepare for her important visit, and she rose early, and sat up late, to help Elizabeth, who was called Mrs. Ashton's maid, but who had to perform the office of schoolroom maid, under-nurse, and worker for the family in general. Nisida was clever with her fingers, and on the last even ing before her journey, when she contemplated the result of her labours on the various little etceteras that make the finishing touches of a lady's toilet, she congratulated herself that she should not cut such a bad figure after all among her fashionable cousins ; whether she was right in her surmises time will show.

Chapter II

To-morrow is that lamp upon the marsh, which the traveller never reacheth ; To-morrow, the rainbow's cup, coveted prize of ignorance. To-morrow, the shifting anchorage, dangerous trust of mariners. Lo, it is the even of to-day — a day so lately, a to-morrow. Yes ! The long wished-for to-morrow had arrived, and beheld Nisida in the train, speeding her way to Deerhurst. Her father had driven her early in the morning to the station at Helston, and having seen her into the ladies' carriage, and enjoined the guard to look after her and her luggage at K , where she would have to change the line, proceeded to his office without bestowing much thought on his daughter, except the comforting assurance to himself, that he supposed he had done the right thing in letting her go, and that friendships were often made amongst young people, without being shared by their parents, and after all it need not be more than one visit.

Nisida would return in a fortnight, and if her head were not turned by the different mode of life at Deerhurst, all would be well, and he need not trouble his head at present about any reciprocation of civilities. But what were Nisida's sensations as her day's journey drew towards a close, and when, after leaving the station about three miles distant from Deerhurst, she found herself in the large close carriage that had been sent for her, proceeding at a rapid pace along the level road to the keeper's lodge at the west entrance of the park ? In after years the recollection of those first impressions often returned, when time and greater experience of life had caused her opinions to be much altered. She turned in an excited way from one window of the carriage to the other, admiring the tasteful undulations of the park, the fine trees, and, after half a mile's drive, the mansion itself of true Elizabethan style ; her heart beat quickly, and a nervous trepidation seized her as the coachman (being angry at having been kept half an hour at the station, owiug to her train being late) gave the high-mettled horses a final lash, which made them break into a canter, and then pulling them up with a jerk, caused them to come almost on their haunches at the front door ; the footman sprang down, and a loud peal was ringing through the house ; and two other men ser vants were on the doorsteps, waiting to hand her from the carriage before she could collect her thoughts.

She followed them mechanically through the spacious hall, where a large and blazing fire brightened the early twilight Of the brief November day ; and through a circular ante-room, then the door being thrown open, and her name announced, she found herself in the lofty drawing-room, and in the presence of the assembled family. Oh ! how many a time in her future life did the memory of that first introduction return to Nisida with all the vividness of the present moment. Lady Arabella was reclining in an easy chair near the fire ; on a low stool close to her sat an apparently tall young lady endeavouring to read a letter by the firelight. At a small table further off, on which stood the remains of afternoon tea, sat a young man of about twenty years of age, whose hunting-dress and splashed boots told of the sport he was evidently describing to his sister who sat beside him, aud who, with the exception of being a little stouter, and having rather more colour, appeared the exact counter part of the young lady on the hearth-rug.

Further off again, nearer the window, and seemingly apart from the rest, sat another person, who did not partake of the strong family likeness remarkable in the others, and whom Nisida in her first comprehensive glance concluded to be Graham, the eldest son. Mr. Moore was evidently not present. They all rose as she advanced into the room ; Lady Arabella, she thought, a little languidly, as though loth to leave the fireside, aud her manner lacked something of heartiness, although she came forward, took her by the hand and led her to a sofa, saying, " You are later, my dear, than we expected ; I hope you are not very tired with your long journey ;" and in the same breath, she ordered lights aud more tea. The two girls then came forward and shook hands, looking as Nisida thought alarmingly fashionable ; their dress was fashionable, their style was fashionable, and their manner was fashionable, although Charlotte, the elder one, as she rose from her seat by the fire, only remarked " that she must have found it bitterly cold ;" and Georgina, the younger, that " she wondered she was not half frozen."

Robert the sportsman, swung her hand rather roughly she thought, and said, "It could not have been very jolly travelling all alone," while Graham merely said, " How do you do ? " without further observation. Nisida had ex pected a rather more cordial reception ; but, as she said to herself, no doubt in fashionable society people were not very demonstrative, and being not particularly so her self, from the long habit of keeping her own thoughts and feelings to herself, she did not feel much disappointed or annoyed. The footman soon entering with the tea and lights, while partaking of the former, Nisida was able to take a more correct survey of her hitherto unknown relations. Yes ! the Miss Moores were decidedly handsome, that she could not deny, and what was more, they seemed perfectly aware of the fact themselves, self-satisfied, lively, stylish, fashionable girls !

Nisida remarked to herself, " How shall I ever get on with them ?" They were very much alike, although on closer observation each had individual charac teristics. Charlotte's was perhaps a cleverer face, Georgina's more good tempered. Robert was more like his younger sister in features, but his face was not a pleasant one to look on ; there was a certain vindictive scowl about his eyes, and an uuspoken sneer on his lips, that told of pas sions uncontrolled. Graham's face was more difficult to describe ; it was not a bright or a happy countenance, but there was an intellectual look about the forehead and dark grey eyes, and something firm about the compressed lips, which rather surprised Nisida, as she had heard a vague report that as a child he was considered wanting in intellect ; in fact she had heard him described as imbecile.

He was Mr. Moore's eldest son by a former wife ; but there was not two years' difference in age between him and his half-brother Robert, Mr. Moore having married again with in the year. But it will be necessary at this point to retrace a little the history of the family, that the reader may become acquainted with certain events and circumstances of which Nisida herself had but an imperfect knowledge. Mr. Moore's first wife was a young and gentle creature, with many personal attractions, but possessing no fortune ; he had become acquainted with her whilst staying at the country house of a mutual friend, had fallen in love with her at first sight, and had been devotedly attached to her a year or so before his sentiments were known to his own family. It was with difficulty he obtained a reluctant consent to his marriage from his father who was M.P. for the north part of the county in which he resided, and an ambitious man, who thought that the bride of the heir of Deerhurst should have brought title or fortune into the family.

She was, however, a happy wife for the first year of her married life ; in the second she fell into bad health, and at the close of it prematurely gave birth to a son, and dying the same day, her gentle spirit passed away from a world that might have proved too cold and unsympathizing for her pure and loving nature. Her child, a weakly, tiny thing, was loved and welcomed by no one ; the father deeming it the cause of his wife's death, hated the sight of it, and there were no relations on the mother's side to take the poor motherless babe, and " love it for its mother's sake." The paternal grandfather who had regarded the mother's death as a judgment upon her for marrying his son, secretly hoped for the child's death, and as that event did not occur, took it as a personal grievance to himself.

He had long since lost his own wife, and lived at Deerhurst Park with his only un married daughter, a cold and selfish person. The younger Mr. Moore, after passing the first fortnight of his widowed life in uncontrolled grief at his desolate home (a moderate sized house, called the Grange, belonging to his father, and situated just outside the park gates of Deerhurst), was ad vised by his friends to go abroad, and try travelling as a soothing balm for his torn and lacerated feelings ; a recom mendation usually brought forward by kind friends and re latives, as a panacea for all evils, mental and bodily. So Edward Moore took the advice, and went abroad, aud from the consequences that followed, it might be fairly argued the counsel in this instance was wisely given, as ere the first lonely year of widowhood had rolled away, the broken hearted man returned to Deerhurst accompanied by another lovely and accomplished bride !

On looking back over the few months that had elapsed, such an astounding climax seemed to have been brought about in the most natural manner possible. The disconsolate mourner had, on leaving England early in the year, gone first of all to Paris, but that gay capital failing to effect any cure, he was advised to try Rome. He did so, arriving about the time of the Carnival ; but there, the Masques and Masquerades would have proved equally unsuccessful, had he not chanced to get an introduction to the family of the Earl of Clifden, who were passing the winter at Rome, and who in compassion for his loneliness often invited him to join their party in visits to the galleries, rides in the campagna, and iu quiet social evenings at their hotel. We will not probe too deeply Lady Clifden's kind compassion for the solitary young man, or remark on her clever manœuvres that her younger daughter Arabella should always ride with him, and sit next him at dinner ; but as she said, " dear Arabella was more feeling and sympathizing by nature than her elder daughter," whose sympathies " by the way " were already engaged by young Lord Reginald de Brett; indeed, she seemed formed to con sole the sad and sorrowful, and no doubt the fond mother was right in her conclusions, for in the course of a few months Edward Moore had prevailed on the gentle Arabella to be his consoler through life.

And now events rapidly succeeded one another. It being too hot to remain in Rome, the whole party proceeded to the Italian lakes, where, after a time, they parted. The family of Lord Clifden might shortly after have been found in Paris, going through the important occupation of procuring the trousseau, while Edward Moore turned his steps towards the mountains of Switzerland, where in lonely wanderings mid the sublime and beautiful, he had plomty of time to ponder the past and anticipate the future. Whether his musings were always happy ones, it is not for the author to decide ; suffice it to say, that at the time appointed he arrived at Kinloch Castle in Ayrshire, to claim his affianced bride, and join in the festivities of his second marriage. The honeymoon having been spent at the residence of a relative, who had lent it for the occasion, Edward Moore, as before stated, returned to Deerhurst at the close of the year, under very different circumstances from those under which he had quitted it.

His second wife was received as cordially as he could have wished by his father, who entirely approved his choice, and the neighbourhood arouud, in their eagerness to greet and pay their respects to the lady of title, soon forgot her more unpretending predecessor. The Lady Arabella was spoken of as handsome, charming, and affable ; such an acquisition to the neighbourhood ! and it certainly did seem her one endeavour to make herself agreeable and to ingratiate herself with all around her. But the one cloud on the bright horizon, the dark spot that marred her domestic happiness was the poor unconscious babe that would not die to please its relations, and smooth over diffi culties ; the sickly child struggled on, and rather improved than grew worse, though all had foretold it would soon follow its poor mother, and that it would be a merciful dispensation of Providence when it did.

It had beeu baptized a few hours after its birth by the clergyman of the parish, who had been hastily summoned, and who with his wife had acted sponsers, and finding it was left to them to choose a name, had fixed ou that of Graham, his mother's maiden name, hoping that in the future their choice might please the father ! whether it did so or not it was impossible to say, as he make no remark thereon. After his return home, on his second marriage, the child continued to stay at the park ; not that it was taken much notice of there, as it lived entirely in the nurseries, which were iu a separate wing of the house and had to be reached by a long empty gallery. Miss Moore occasionally visited it, but days elapsed when no one but servants crossed the threshold of the nursery door. Now, it was not the inten of the elder Mr. Moore to adopt his grandson as a member of his household, and what seemed strange to those around, Lady Arabella most strongly opposed such a plan, although her husband would gladly have given up the child to its grandfather, had the latter been disposed to take it ; but she urged its return to the Grange, and was praised for her unselfishness in wishing to take charge of a sickly babe, when she was soon expecting one of her own.

In the following autumn she gave birth to a healthy boy, but before that event happened another claim had beeu put forth for the little Graham, in the persons of its god-parents, Mr. aud Mrs. Preston, who offered to take him for a few months' visit, on the plea that they ought to become acquainted with their little god-child. Lady Arabella having most graciously acquiesced, the poor discarded child was sent to the Rectory, and the few months visit extended over the space of two years, and it would have been difficult to say for how much longer, had not Mr. Preston fallen into bad health, and been recommended by the doctor to winter abroad. He succeeded in making an exchange with a chap lain in the South of France for a couple of years, and shortly after started for the continent. In the meantime, the little Graham had to quit his happy home at the vicarage, where he had greatly improved in health and strength, and he once more returned to the Grange, where he arrived just before the advent of twin daughters.

Four years passed away before Mr. Preston was well enough to resume his duties at Deerhurst, and during that time many changes had taken place. The elder Mr. Moore had died, his son had suc ceeded to his property and had gone to live at the family mansion, (his sister, Miss Moore, having taken a house in London, and made her home there) ; he had also been elected in his father's stead as one of the County members. NISIDA; OR, In fact, in all things connected with Deerhurst, one genera tion had passed away and another had succeeded. But there was one circumstance connected with the family changes, which had been busily discussed in the surrounding neighbourhood, viz. the report that Lady Arabella had prevailed on her father-in-law to entail the beautiful estate of Deerhurst on her own son Robert, to the exclusion of her step-son Graham.

It was said that Lady Arabella had done so, for certainly her husband would never have interfered in the matter. He had much changed since his second marriage — a reserved and gloomy deport ment having superseded his former pleasant, genial manners — they said he had never got over his first wife's death ; be that as it may, he certainly appeared to take but little pleasure in his present wife and family — his only interest seemed to be in politics, he was absorbed in them from morning to night. He had been an unsuccessful candidate in a contested election a short time before his father's death, and he was on the look-out for another vacancy when that event happened, and an appeal being made to him to stand in his father's place, he was brought in without opposition. At that time he saw but little of his children.