Chapter X
Pan Plavitski was what is called a well-bred man, for he returned Pan Stanislav's visit on the third day. He did not return it on the second, for such haste would have indicated a wish to maintain intimate relations; and not on the fourth nor the fifth, for that would have shown a want of acquaintance with the habits of society,--but only within the period most specially and exclusively indicated by command of savoir vivre. Plavitski prided himself all his life on a knowledge of those commands, and esteemed them as his own; the observances of them he considered as the highest human wisdom. It is true that, as a man of sense, he permitted other branches of knowledge to exist, on condition, however, that they should not be overestimated; and especially, that they should not have the claim to force themselves on to people who were truly well-bred.
Pan Stanislav--for whom everything was desirable that would strengthen in any way the thread of further relations with Marynia--was hardly able to conceal his delight at the arrival of Plavitski. That delight was evident in his agreeable reception, full of good-humor. He must have been astonished, besides, at Plavitski, and the influence which the city had exercised on him. His hair shone like the wing of a raven; his little mustaches were sticking up, vying with the color of his hair; his white shirt covered a slender form; his scarf-pin and black vest gave a certain holiday brilliancy to his whole figure.
"On my word, I did not recognize my uncle at the first moment!" cried Pan Stanislav. "I thought that some youngster was coming."
"Bon jour, bon jour!" answered Plavitski. "The day is cloudy; a little dark here. It must be for that reason that thou didst mistake me for a stripling."
"Cloudy or clear, what a figure!" answered Pan Stanislav.
And seizing Plavitski by the side, without ceremony, he began to turn him around and say--
"A waist just like a young lady's! Would that I might have such a one!"
Plavitski, offended greatly by such an unceremonious greeting, but still more delighted at the admiration roused by his person, said, defending himself,--
"Voyons! Thou art a lunatic. I might be angry. Thou art a lunatic!"
"But uncle will turn as many heads as he pleases."
"What dost thou say?" asked Plavitski, sitting down in an armchair.
"I say that uncle has come here for conquest."
"I have no thought whatever of that. Thou art a lunatic!"
"But Pani Yamish? or haven't I seen with my own eyes--"
"What?"
Here Plavitski shut one eye and thrust out the point of his tongue; but that lasted only an instant, then he raised his brows, and said,--
"Well, as to Pani Yamish? She is well enough in Kremen. Between thee and me, I cannot endure affectation,--it savors of the country. May the Lord God not remember, for Pani Yamish, how much she has tortured me with her affectation: a woman should have courage to grow old, then a relation would end in friendship; otherwise it becomes slavery."
"And my dear uncle felt like a butterfly in bonds?"
"But don't talk in that way," answered Plavitski, with dignity, "and do not imagine that there was anything between us. Even if there had been, thou wouldst not have heard a word about it from me. Believe me, there is a great difference between you of this and us of the preceding generation. We were not saints, perhaps; but we knew how to be silent, and that is a great virtue, without which what is called true nobility cannot exist."
"From this I infer that uncle will not confess to me where he is going, with this carnation in his buttonhole?"
"Oh, yes, yes! Mashko invited me to-day to dine with a number of other persons. At first I refused, not wishing to leave Marynia alone. But I have sat so many years in the country for her sake that in truth a little recreation is due to me. But art thou not invited?"
"No."
"That astonishes me: thou art, as thou sayest, an 'affairist'; but thou bearest a good family name. For that matter, Mashko is an advocate himself. But, in general, I confess that I did not suspect in Mashko the power to place himself as he has."
"Mashko could place himself even on his head--"
"He goes everywhere; all receive him. Once I had a prejudice against him."
"And has uncle none now?"
"I must acknowledge that he has acted with me in all that business of Kremen like a gentleman."
"Is Panna Marynia of the same opinion?"
"Certainly; though I think that Kremen lies on her heart. I got rid of it for her sake, but youth cannot understand everything. I knew about her views, however, and am ready to endure every bitterness with calm. As to Mashko, in truth, she cannot cast reproach at him for anything. He bought Kremen, it is true, but--"
"But he is ready to give it back?"
"Thou art of the family, so, speaking between us, I think that that is true. Marynia occupied him greatly, even during our former visit to Warsaw; but somehow the affair did not move. The maiden was too young; he did not please her sufficiently; I was a little opposed myself, for I was prejudiced as to his family. Bukatski sharpened his teeth at him, so it ended in nothing."
"It did not end, since it is beginning again."
"It is, for I am convinced that he comes of a very good family, once Italian and formerly called Masco. They came here with Queen Bona, and settled in White Russia at that time. He, if thou hast noticed it, has a face somewhat Italian."
"No; he has a Portuguese face."
"That is all one, however. But the plan to sell Kremen and still to keep it--no common head could have worked that out. As to Mashko--yes I think that such is his plan. Marynia is a strange girl, though. It is bitter to say this, that a man understands a stranger sooner than his own child. But if she will only say as Talleyrand did, 'Paris vaut la messe.'"
"Ah, I thought that it was Henry IV. who said that."
"Thou didst, for thou art an 'affairist,' a man of recent times. History and ancient deeds are not to the taste of you young men, ye prefer to make money. Everything depends, then, on Marynia; but I will not hurry her. I will not, for, finally, with our connections, a better match may be found. It is necessary to go out a little among people and find old acquaintances. That is only toil and torment; but what is necessary, is necessary. Thou thinkest that I go to this dinner with pleasure. No! but I must receive young people sometimes. I hope too that thou wilt not forget us."
"No, no; I will not."
"Dost know what they say of thee?--that thou art making money infernally. Well, well, I don't know whom thou art like--not like thy father! In every case, I am not the man to blame thee, no, no! Thou didst throttle me without mercy, didst treat me as the wolf did the lamb; but there is in thee something which pleases me,--I have for thee a kind of weakness."
"The feeling is mutual." said Pan Stanislav.
In fact, Plavitski did not lie. He had an instinctive respect for property, and that young man, who was gaining it, roused in him a certain admiration, bordering on sympathy. He was not some poor relative who might ask for assistance; and therefore Plavitski, though for the moment he had no calculations in regard to Pan Stanislav, resolved to keep up relations with him. At the end of the visit he began to look around on the apartments.
"Thou hast fine lodgings!" said he.
That, too, was true. Pan Stanislav had a dwelling furnished as if he were about to marry. The furnishing itself caused him pleasure, for it gave a certain show of reality to his wishes.
Plavitski, looking around at the drawing-room, beyond which was another smaller apartment furnished very elegantly, inquired,--
"Why not marry?"
"I will when I can."
Plavitski smiled cunningly, and, patting Pan Stanislav on the knee, began to repeat,--
"I know whom; I know whom."
"Wit is needed in this case!" cried Pan Stanislav; "try to keep a secret from such a diplomat."
"Ah ha! whom? The widow, the widow--whom?"
"Dear uncle!"
"Well? May God bless thee, as I bless thee! But now I am going, for it is time to dine, and in the evening there will be a concert in Dolina."
"In company with Mashko?"
"No, with Marynia; but Mashko too will be there."
"I will go also, with Bigiel."
"Then we shall see each other. A mountain cannot meet a mountain, but a man may meet a man any time."
"As Talleyrand said."
"Till our next meeting, then!"
Pan Stanislav liked music at times; he had had no thought, though, of going to this concert; but when Plavitski mentioned it, a desire of seeing Mashko seized him. After Plavitski had gone, he thought some time yet whether to go or not; but it might be said that he did this for form's sake, since he knew in advance that he would not hold out and would go. Bigiel, who came to him for a business consultation in the afternoon, let himself be persuaded easily, and about four o'clock they were in Dolina.
The day, though in September, was so warm and pleasant that people had assembled numerously; the whole audience had a summer look. On all sides were bright-colored dresses, parasols, and youthful women, who had swarmed forth like many-colored butterflies, warmed by the sun. In this swarm, predestined for love, or already the object of that feeling and entertaining it, and assembled there for the pursuit of love and for music, Marynia also was to appear. Pan Stanislav remembered his student years, when he was enamoured of unknown maidens whom he sought in throngs of people, and made mistakes every moment, through similarity of hat, hair, and general appearance. And it happened now to him, to mistake at a distance a number of persons for Marynia,--persons more or less like her; and now, as before, whenever he said to himself, "This is she!" he felt those quivers at the heart, that disquiet which he had felt formerly. To-day, however, anger came on him, for this seemed to him ridiculous; and, besides, he felt that such eagerness for meetings and interviews, by occupying a man, and fixing his attention on one woman, increases the interest which she excites, and binds him all the more to her.
Meanwhile the orchestra began to play before he could find her for whom he was looking. It was necessary to sit down and listen, which he did unwillingly, secretly impatient with Bigiel, who listened with closed eyes. After the piece was ended, he saw at last Plavitski's shining cylinder, and his black mustaches; beyond him the profile of Marynia. Mashko sat third, calm, full of distinction, with the mien of an English lord. At times he talked to Marynia, and she turned to him, nodding slightly.
"The Plavitskis are there," said Pan Stanislav. "We must greet them."
"Where dost thou see them?"
"Over there, with Mashko."
"True. Let us go."
And they went.
Marynia, who liked Pani Bigiel, greeted Bigiel very cordially. She bowed to Pan Stanislav not with such coolness as to arrest attention; but she talked with Bigiel, inquiring for the health of his wife and children. In answer, he invited her and her father very earnestly to visit them on the following week, at his place in the country.
"My wife will be happy, very happy!" repeated he. "Pani Emilia too will come."
Marynia tried to refuse; but Plavitski, who sought entertainment, and who knew from his former stay in Warsaw that Bigiel lived well, accepted. It was settled that they would dine, and return in the evening. The trip was an easy one, for Bigiel's villa was only one station distant from Warsaw.
"Meanwhile sit near us," said Plavitski; "right here a number of seats are unoccupied."
Pan Stanislav had turned already to Marynia,--
"Have you news from Pani Emilia?"
"I wished to ask if you had," answered she.
"I have not; but to-morrow I shall inquire about Litka by telegram."
Here the conversation stopped. Bigiel took the seat next to Plavitski, Pan Stanislav on the outside. Marynia turned to Mashko again, so that Pan Stanislav could see only her profile, and that not completely. It seemed to him that she had grown somewhat thin, or at least her complexion had become paler and more delicate during her stay of a few weeks in Warsaw; hence her long eyelashes were more sharply defined and seemed to cast more shade. Her whole form had become more exquisite, as it were. The effect was heightened by a careful toilet and equally careful arrangement of hair, the style of which was different from what it had been. Formerly she wore her hair bound lower down, now it was dressed more in fashion; that is, high under her hat. Pan Stanislav noted her elegant form at a glance, and admired with his whole soul the charm of it, which was evident in everything, even in the way in which she held her hands on her knees. She seemed very beautiful to him. He felt again with great force that if every man bears within him his own type of female charm, which is the measure of the impression that a given woman makes on him, Marynia is for him so near his type that she and it are almost identical, and, looking at her, he said to himself,--
"Oh to have such a wife, to have such a wife!"
But she turned to Mashko. Perhaps she turned even too often; and if Pan Stanislav had preserved all his coolness of blood, he might have thought that she did so to annoy him, and that was the case, perhaps. Their conversation must have been animated, however, for, from time to time, a bright blush flashed over her face.
"But she is simply playing the coquette with him," thought Pan Stanislav, gritting his teeth. And he wanted absolutely to hear what they were saying; that was difficult, however. The audience, during the long intervals, was noisy enough. Separated by two persons from Marynia, Pan Stanislav could not hear what she said; but after a new piece of music had been finished, he heard single words and opinions from Mashko, who had the habit of speaking with emphasis, so as to give greater weight to each word.
"I like him," said Mashko. "Every man has a weakness; his weakness is money--I am grateful to him, for he persuaded me--to Kremen--I think, besides, that he is a sincere well-wisher of yours, for he has not spared--I confess, too, that he roused my curiosity."
Marynia answered something with great vivacity; then Pan Stanislav heard again the end of Mashko's answer,--
"A character not formed yet, and intelligence perhaps less than energy, but a nature rather good."
Pan Stanislav understood perfectly that they were talking of him, and recognized Mashko's tactics equally well. To judge, as it were, with reason and impartially, rather, to praise, or at least to recognize various qualities, and at the same time to strip them of every charm, was a method well known to the young advocate. Through this he raised himself to the exceptional, and, as it were, higher position of a judge. Pan Stanislav knew, too, that Mashko spoke not so much with intent to lower him, as to exalt himself, and that likely he would have said the same thing of every other young man in whom he might suspect a possible rival.
They were finally the tactics which Pan Stanislav himself might have used in a similar case; this did not hinder him, however, from considering them in Mashko as the acme of perversity, and he determined to pay him if the opportunity offered.
Toward the end of the concert he was able to see how far Mashko was assuming the rôle of suitor. When Marynia, wishing to tie her veil, had removed her gloves and they had fallen from her knees, Mashko raised them and held them, together with her parasol; at the same time he took her wrap from the side of the chair and placed it across his arm, so as to give it to her when they were leaving the garden,--in a word, he was entirely occupied with the lady, though he preserved the coolness and tact of a genuine man of society. He seemed also sure of himself and happy. In fact, Marynia, beyond the brief conversation with Bigiel, talked only with Mashko during the time when she was not listening to the music. When they moved toward the gate, she went with him and before her father. Again Pan Stanislav saw her smiling profile turning to Mashko. While talking, they looked into each other's eyes. Her face was vivacious, and her attention directed exclusively to what he was saying. She was, in fact, coquetting with Mashko, who saw it himself, without admitting, however, for a moment, in spite of his cleverness, that she could do so merely to worry Pan Stanislav.
Before the gate a carriage was waiting in which Mashko seated her and her father. He began then to take leave of them; but Marynia, inclining toward him, said,--
"How is this? Papa has invited you; is it not true, papa?"
"He was to come with us," said Plavitski.
Mashko took his seat in the carriage, and they drove away, exchanging bows with Bigiel and Pan Stanislav. The two friends walked on a good while in silence; at last Pan Stanislav said, feigning calmness in his voice,--
"I am curious to know if they are betrothed."
"I do not think they are," said Bigiel; "but it is tending that way."
"I too see that."
"I thought that Mashko would seek property. But he is in love, and that may happen even to a man who is thinking only of a career. Mashko is in love. Besides, by taking her he will free himself from paying for Kremen. No, the business is not so bad as it seems, and the lady is very pretty; what is true, is true."
And they were silent again. But Pan Stanislav felt so oppressed that he could not control himself.
"This thought that she will marry him is simply a torment to me. And this helplessness! I should prefer anything to such helplessness. I speak to thee openly. What a stupid and ridiculous rôle I have played in the whole affair!"
"Thou hast gone too far,--that may happen to any one; that thou wert her father's creditor is the fault of remarkable circumstances. Thy understanding of such matters differs utterly from his: thou and he are men from two different planets, hence the misunderstanding. Perhaps the affair was too sharply put by thee; but when I think it all over, too great mildness was not proper, even out of regard to Panna Marynia. By making too great abatements thou wouldst have made them for her,--is it not true? What would have resulted? This, that she helped her father in exploiting thee. No; it was for thee to finish the matter."
Here the prudent Bigiel checked himself, thought a moment, and said,--
"And as to thy rôle, there is one escape: to withdraw completely, leave events to their course, and tell thyself that all is going according to thy idea."
"How will it help me," cried Pan Stanislav, violently, "to say that, when all is going against my idea?--and since I feel foolish, there is no help for it. How could there be? To begin with, I did all this myself, and now I want to undo it. All my life I have known what I wanted, but this time I have acted as if I didn't know."
"There are passages in life to be forgotten."
"That may be, my dear man, but meanwhile interest in life falls away. Is the question whether I am well or ill, rich or naked, the same to me now as it once was? I feel sick at the very thought of the future. Thou art established and connected with life; but what am I? There was a prospect; now there is none. That gives a great distaste for things."
"But surely Panna Marynia is not the only woman on earth."
"Why say that? She is the only one now; were there another, I should think of that other. What is the use of such talk? In this lies the question, in this the whole evil,--that she is the only one. A year from now a tile may fall on my head, or I may find another woman: what will happen to-morrow I know not; but that the deuce is taking me to-day, I do know. This is connected in me with other things too, of which to-day I do not care to speak. In external life it is necessary to eat bread in peace,--is not that true? In internal life it is the same. And this is an urgent affair; but I defer internal life till after marriage, for I understand that new conditions work out a new way of thinking, and moreover, I wish to finish one thing before beginning another. But everything grows involved,--not only involved, but vanishes. Barely has something appeared when it is gone. This is the case now. I live in uncertainty. I would prefer if they were already betrothed, for then all would end of itself."
"I tell thee only this," said Bigiel: "when I was a boy, I got a thorn in me sometimes; it pained much less to draw the thorn out myself than to let some one else draw it."
"In that thou art right," said Pan Stanislav, who added after a while, "The thorn may be drawn if it has not gone in too deeply, and one can seize it. But what are comparisons! When a thorn is drawn out, nothing is lost; but my hope of the future is ruined."
"That may be true; but if there is no help for it?"
"To accept that view is just what grieves the man who is not an imbecile."
The conversation stopped here. At the moment of parting Pan Stanislav said,--
"By the way, I should prefer not to be with you on Sunday."
"Maybe thou wilt do well to stay away."
Chapter XI
A surprise was waiting at home for Pan Stanislav; he found the following despatch from Pani Emilia, "I leave here for home to-morrow evening; Litka is well." This return was unexpected, or at least uncommonly hurried; but since the despatch contained an assurance as to Litka's health, Pan Stanislav understood that Pani Emilia was returning for the sole purpose of occupying herself with his affair, and his heart rose in gratitude. "There is an honest nature," said he to himself; "that is a friend." And with thankfulness there rose in his heart such hope, as if Pani Emilia had the ring of an enchantress, or a magic rod, with which she could change the heart of Panna Marynia in an instant. Pan Stanislav did not know clearly how this could be done; but he knew that one person at least wished him well with deep sincerity, would speak for him, would justify him, would exalt his heart and character and diminish prejudices, which the course of events had accumulated against him. He calculated that Pani Emilia would be very persevering, and that for her this would be a question of duty. A man who is troubled by something is glad to find a person on whom to put responsibility. So in moments of rising bitterness, especially, it seemed to Pan Stanislav that Pani Emilia was responsible for his relations with Marynia; for if she had not shown that letter from which Marynia's readiness to love him was evident, he would have been able to take his mind and heart from her. Perhaps this was true, since in the history of his feelings this letter did in fact play a leading part. It showed him how near happiness had been, almost secured; to what extent in her own mind Marynia had given him heart and soul. It is more difficult to throw away happiness which is not only desired, but begun; and, had it not been for that letter, Pan Stanislav might have regretted the past less, forgotten it more easily, and reconciled himself to the position more readily. At present he thought it even her duty to help him with all her power. Finally, he understood that the affair would move, as it were, of itself; he hoped to see Marynia often, and in conditions most favorable, since he would see her in a house where he was loved and esteemed, and where like feelings must be communicated to each guest. All this strengthened Pan Stanislav's hope; but it added new links to those which bound his thoughts to Marynia. Previously he had promised himself not to go to Bigiel's (on Sunday); now he changed his decision, thinking that, if only health permitted, Pani Emilia too would take part in the trip. Aside from reasons connected with Marynia, he rejoiced from his whole soul to see the beloved faces of Pani Emilia and Litka, who were his greatest attachments in life so far.
That same evening he wrote a few words to Plavitski touching the arrival, supposing that Marynia would be thankful for that information; he gave notice at Pani Emilia's, so that servants would be waiting in the morning with tea; and he hired a commodious carriage to take her and Litka to their home.
Next morning at five he was at the station; while waiting for the train, he began to run briskly along the platform to warm himself somewhat, since the morning was cool. Remote objects, the station buildings, and the cars standing on the near rails, were sunk in fog, which, very dense near the ground, became rose-colored and shining higher up, announcing that the day would be pleasant. Except officials and servants, there was no one on the platform yet, because of the early hour; gradually, however, people began to arrive. All at once two forms came out of the fog; in one of these Pan Stanislav, with beating heart, recognized Marynia, who was hastening, with her maid, to greet Pani Emilia. As he had not expected the meeting, he was greatly confused at the first moment. She stopped short, as if astonished or troubled. After a while, however, he approached and extended his hand to her,--
"Good-day!" said he. "And truly it will be a good day for us both if our travellers arrive."
"Then is it not certain?" asked Marynia.
"Of course it is certain, unless something unlooked for prevents. I received a despatch yesterday, and sent the news to Pan Plavitski, thinking that you would be glad to hear it."
"Thank you. The surprise was so pleasant!"
"The best proof of that is that you have risen so early."
"I have not lost the habit of early rising yet."
"We came too soon. The train will arrive only in half an hour. Meanwhile I advise you to walk, for the morning is cool, though the day promises to be fine."
"The fog is clearing," said Marynia, raising her blue eyes, which to Pan Stanislav seemed violet in the light of the morning.
"Do you wish to walk along the platform?"
"Thank you; I prefer to sit in the waiting-room."
And, nodding, she went away. Pan Stanislav began to fly with hurried steps along the platform. It was somewhat bitter to think that she would not remain; but he explained to himself that perhaps this was not proper, and, besides, the bitterness was overcome by the pleasant thought of how the coming of Pani Emilia would bring them nearer, and how many meetings it would cause. A certain wonderful solace and good-humor continued to rise in him. He thought of the violet eyes of Marynia, and her face made rosy by the coolness of the morning; he rushed past the windows of the hall in which she was sitting, and said to himself almost joyfully,--
"Ah, ha! sit there, hide thyself! I will find thee." And he felt with greater force than ever how dear she might become to him, if she would be kind even in a small degree. Meanwhile bells sounded; and a few minutes later, in the fog, still dense at the earth, though the sky above was blue, appeared the dim outlines of the train, which, as it approached, became more clearly defined. The engine, puffing interrupted clumps of smoke, rolled in with decreasing movement, and, stopping, began with noise and hissing to belch forth under its front wheels the useless remnant of steam.
Pan Stanislav sprang to the sleeping-car; the first face at the window was Litka's, which at sight of him grew as radiant as if a sudden sunbeam had fallen on it. The little girl's hands began to move joyously, beckoning to Pan Stanislav, who was in the car in one moment.
"My dearest little kitten!" cried he, seizing Litka's hand, "and hast thou slept; art thou well?"
"I am well; and we have come home. And we'll be together--and good-day, Pan Stas!"
Right behind the little girl stood Pani Emilia, whose hand "Pan Stas" kissed very cordially; and he began to speak quickly, as people do at time of greeting,--
"Good day to the dear lady. I have a carriage. You can go at once. My servant will take your baggage; I ask only for the check. They are waiting for you at home with tea. Pray give the check. Panna Plavitski is here too."
Panna Plavitski was waiting, in fact, outside the car; and she and Pani Emilia shook hands, with faces full of smiles. Litka looked for a moment at Marynia, as if hesitating; after a while, however, she threw herself on her neck with her usual cordiality.
"Marynia, thou wilt go with us to tea," said Pani Emilia. "It is ready, and thou art fasting, of course."
"Thou art tired, travelling all night."
"From the boundary we slept as if killed; and when we woke, we had time to wash and dress. In every case we must drink tea. Thou wilt go with us?"
"I will, with the greatest pleasure."
But Litka began to pull at her mother's dress.
"Mamma, and Pan Stas."
"But, naturally, Pan Stas too,--he thought of everything. Thanks to him, everything is ready. He must go with us, of course."
"He must; he must!" cried Litka, turning to Pan Stanislav, who answered, smiling,--
"Not he must; but he wants to."
And after a moment all four took their places in the carriage. Pan Stanislav was in excellent humor. Marynia was before him, and at his side little Litka. It seemed to him that the morning brightness was entering him, and that better days were beginning. He felt that henceforth he would belong to an intimate circle of beings bound together by comradeship and friendship, and in that circle would be Marynia. Now she was sitting there before him, near his eye, and near the friendship which both felt for Pani Emilia and Litka. Meanwhile all four were talking joyously.
"What has happened, Emilka," asked Marynia, "that thou hast come so soon?"
"Litka begged so every day to come home."
"Dost not like to live abroad?" asked Pan Stanislav.
"No."
"Homesick for Warsaw?"
"Yes."
"And for me? Now tell quickly, or it will be bad."
Litka looked at her mother, at Marynia, and then at Pan Stanislav; and at last she said,--
"And for Pan Stas too."
"Take this for that!" said Pan Stanislav, and he seized her little hand to kiss it; but she defended herself as she could. At last she hid her hand. He, turning to Marynia, and showing his sound white teeth, said,--
"As you see, we are always quarrelling; but we love each other."
"That is the way generally," answered Marynia.
And he, looking her straight and honestly in the eyes, said,--
"Oh that it were the way generally!"
Marynia blushed slightly and grew more serious, but said nothing, and began to converse with Pani Emilia.
Pan Stanislav turned to Litka.
"But where is Professor Vaskovski? Has he gone to Italy?"
"No. He stopped at Chenstohova, and will come the day after to-morrow."
"Is he well?"
"He is."
Here the little girl looked at her friend, and said,--
"But Pan Stas has grown thin; hasn't he, mamma?"
"Indeed he has," answered Pani Emilia.
Pan Stanislav was changed somewhat, for he had been sleeping badly, and the cause of that sleeplessness was sitting before him in the carriage. But he laid the blame on cares and labor in his business. Meanwhile they arrived at Pani Emilia's.
When the lady went to greet her servants, Litka ran after her. Pan Stanislav and Marynia remained alone in the dining-room.
"You have no nearer acquaintance here, I suppose, than Pani Emilia?" said Pan Stanislav.
"None nearer; none so beloved."
"In life kindness is needed, and she is very kind and well-wishing. I, for example, who have no family, can look on this as the house of a relative. Warsaw seems different to me when they are here." Then he added, with a voice less firm, "This time I comfort myself also with their arrival, because there will be at last something mutual and harmonious between us."
Here he looked at her, with a prayer in his eyes, as if he wished to say, "Give me a hand in conciliation; be kind to me, too, since a pleasant day has come to us."
But she, just because she could not be for him altogether indifferent, went always farther in the direction of dislike. The more he showed cordial kindness, the more sympathetic he was, the more his action seemed to her unheard of, and the more offended she felt at heart.
Having a delicate nature, and being, besides, rather timid, and feeling really that a reply, if too ill-natured, might spoil the day's harmony, she preferred to be silent; but he did not need an answer in words, for he read in her eyes as follows: The less you try to improve our relations, the better they will be; and they will be best if most distant. His joy was quenched in one moment; anger took its place, and regret, still stronger than anger,--for it rose from that charm which nothing could conquer, and to which Pan Stanislav yielded himself with the conviction, too, that the gulf between him and Marynia was in reality growing deeper each day. And now, looking on her sweet and kind face, he felt that she was as dear as she was lost irrecoverably.
The arrival of Litka put an end to that interval, grievous to him beyond description. The little girl ran in with great delight, her hair in disorder, a smile on her lips; but seeing them, she stopped suddenly, and looked now at one, now at the other, with her dark eyes. At last she sat down quietly at a table with tea. Her joyousness had vanished too, though Pan Stanislav, confining the pain in his heart, strove to talk and be gladsome.
But he turned scarcely any attention to Marynia; he occupied himself only with Pani Emilia and Litka; and, wonderful thing! Marynia felt that as an additional bitterness. To the series of offences still another was added.
On the following day Pani Emilia and Litka were invited to tea in the evening at the Plavitskis'. Plavitski invited Pan Stanislav too, but he did not go. And such is human nature that this again touched Marynia. Dislike, as well as love, demands an object. Involuntarily Marynia looked toward the door all the evening, till the hour struck in which it was certain that Pan Stanislav would not come; then she began to coquet so with Mashko that she transfixed Pani Emilia with amazement.
Chapter XII
Mashko was a very clever man, but full of self-love; he had no reason, however, not to take the kindness which Marynia showed him in good earnest. The unequal degree of it he attributed a little to coquetting, a little to the changing disposition of the young lady; and though the latter filled him with a certain alarm, this alarm was not great enough to restrain him from taking a decisive step.
Bigiel divined the true state of affairs when he declared that Mashko was in love. Such was the case really. At first Panna Plavitski pleased him in a high degree; afterward, when he had thought the pros and cons over, he came to the conviction that the pros had prevailed. The young advocate valued property, it is true; but, gifted with great sobriety of mind, and understanding perfectly the conditions in which he found himself, he concluded that a very wealthy lady he could not find and would not get. Richly dowered young ladies were found either among the aristocracy of descent,--and for him their thresholds were too lofty,--or among the world of financiers, who sought connections with families bearing names more or less famous. Mashko knew perfectly that his painted bishops and armored men, whom Bukatski ridiculed, would not open bankers' safes to him. He understood that even if they had been less fantastic, his profession of advocate would itself be a certain diminutio capitis in the eyes of great financial whales. On the other hand, he had, in truth, a certain racial repugnance to that kind of connection; while maidens of good descent had the uncommon attraction which they have for parvenus generally.
Panna Plavitski had no dower, or at least a very insignificant one. In taking her, however, he would free himself from all obligations to the Plavitskis created by the purchase of Kremen. Secondly, by connecting himself with a good family, he would endeavor to bring in a whole group of noble clients, and this might be a very real profit; finally, through the family relations of Marynia, he might in time manage the business of a number, or a number of tens, of really wealthy families,--a thing which had long been the object of his efforts.
The Plavitskis, like all who are a little above middling country families, had indeed relatives whom they did not greatly recognize; they had also others who did not greatly recognize them. This, however, was done not so much from reasons of pride as involuntarily, by virtue of a certain social selection, through which people seek in society persons who are more or less in the same conditions of life as they themselves are. Great family festivals united such separated relatives temporarily; and Mashko not only found it agreeable to think that at his wedding there would be perfectly well-sounding names, but he foresaw various possible profits. The question would be merely one of cleverness to give people of this kind an idea that it would be well on their part, good and safe, to intrust their business to a man noted for energy, and, more than all, one of their own class, since he is a relative. That would be something like a dower given to a poor cousin. Mashko, taking note of his own qualities, hoped to force himself on them, and in time tower above them. He knew that this man or that would come at first to him for such counsel as he might find in conversation with an acquaintance, or a distant relative, who happened to understand various questions; later on, as the counsels proved good, he would come oftener, and at last put everything into the hands of the counsellor. Helping others in this fashion, he could himself sail out into broad waters, clear Kremen in time, advance to considerable property, throw aside at last legal pursuits, which he did not like, and which he considered only as a means of reaching his object, and fix himself finally in lofty spheres of society as an independent man, and at the same time a representative of superior landed property resting on a firm basis. He had foreseen all this, calculated and counted, before he determined to try for the hand of Panna Plavitski.
He had not foreseen, however, one thing; to wit, that he would fall in love to such a degree as he had. For the time this made him angry, for he judged that too strong a feeling was something opposed to the balance which a man of high society should preserve at all times. That balance was one of his illusions. If he had had no need of forcing himself into that society, or had been born in it, he might have permitted himself to love to his heart's satisfaction.
In spite of all his keenness, he had not understood that one of the chief privileges of this society, which considers itself privileged, is freedom. For this reason he was not altogether content when his heart melted too much in presence of Marynia. But, on the other hand, the object toward which he strove grew identified the more in him with that personal happiness which was verging almost on intoxication.
These were new things for him, so new that the brightness of those unknown horizons blinded him. Mashko had arrived at thirty and some years of his life without knowing what rapture is. Now he understood what happiness and charms were described by that word, for he was enraptured with Marynia to the depth of his soul. Whenever Plavitski received him in his room, and she was in the adjoining one, Mashko was with her in thought to such a degree that hardly could he understand what the old man was saying.
When she entered, there rose in his heart feelings utterly unknown to him hitherto,--feelings tender and delicate, which made him a better man than he was usually. His blue eyes changed their ordinary steel and cold gleam to an expression of sweetness and delight; the freckles on his face, by which he called to mind Professor Vaskovski, became still more distinct; his whole form lost its marks of formality, and he passed his fingers through his light side whiskers, not like an English lord, but an ordinary love-stricken mortal. He rose at last so high that he wished not only his own good, but her good, evidently not understanding it otherwise than through him and in him.
He was so much in love that, if rejected, he might become dangerous, especially in view of his want of moral development, his great real energy, and lack of scruples. Till then he had not loved, and Marynia roused first in him all that was capable of loving. She was not a brilliant beauty; but she possessed in the highest degree the charm of womanliness, and that womanliness was the reason that she attracted energetic natures specially. In her delicate form there was something in common with a climbing plant; she had a calm face, clear eyes, and a mouth somewhat thoughtful,--all this, taken together, did not produce a mighty impression at the first glance, but after a time every man, even the most indifferent, saw that there was in her something peculiar, which made him remember that he had in his presence a woman who might be loved.
In so far as Mashko felt himself better than usual, and in reality was so during that epoch of his life, in that far had the spiritual level of Marynia sunk since the Plavitskis came to Warsaw. The sale of Kremen had deprived her of occupation and a moral basis of life. She lacked a lofty object. Besides, the course of events had accumulated in her bitterness and dissatisfaction, which turn always to the injury of the heart. Marynia felt this herself distinctly; and a few days after that evening when Pan Stanislav did not come to them, she began first to speak of this to Pani Emilia, when at twilight they were left by themselves in the drawing-room adjoining Litka's chamber.
"I see," said she, "that we are not so outspoken with each other as we used to be. I have wished to speak with thee openly, and I cannot bring myself to do so, for it has seemed to me that I am not worthy of thy friendship."
Pani Emilia brought her sweet face up to Marynia's head, and began to kiss her on the temples.
"Ai, thou Marynia, Marynia! What art thou saying, thou, always calm and thoughtful?"
"I say so, for in Kremen I was more worthy than I am now. Thou wilt not believe how attached I was to that corner. I had all my days occupied, and had some sort of wonderful hope that in time something very happy would come to me. To-day all that has passed; and I cannot find myself in this Warsaw, and, what is worse, I cannot find my former honesty. I saw how astonished thou wert because I was coquetting with Pan Mashko. Do not tell me that thou didst not see it. And dost thou think that I myself know why I acted so? It must be because I am worse, or from some anger at myself, at Pan Stanislav, at the whole world. I do not love Mashko; I will not marry him. Therefore I act dishonestly, and with shame I confess it; but moments come in which I should like to do an intended injustice to some one. Thou shouldst break thy old friendship with me, for in truth I am other than I have been."
Here tears began to roll down Marynia's face, and Pani Emilia fell to quieting her and fondling her all the more; at last she said,--
"Pan Mashko is striving for thee most evidently; and I thought, I confess, that thou hadst the intention of accepting him. I tell thee now sincerely that that pained me, for he is not the man for thee; but, knowing thy love for Kremen, I admitted thy wish to return to it in this way."
"At first I had such thoughts, it is true. I wished to persuade myself that Pan Mashko pleased me; I did not like to repulse him. It was a question with me of something else too, but it was a question also of Kremen. But I could not convince myself. I do not want even Kremen at such a price; but precisely in this lies the evil. For, in such a case, why am I leading Pan Mashko into error, why am I deluding him? Through simple dishonesty."
"It is not well that thou art deluding him; but it seems to me that I understand whence that flows. From repugnance to some one else, and from the offence given by him. Is it not true? Console thyself, however, with this, that the evil is not beyond remedy; for thou mayst change thy action with Pan Mashko to-morrow. And, Marynia, it is needful to change it while there is time yet, while nothing is promised."
"I know, Emilia; I understand that. But see, when I am with thee I feel as formerly, like an upright and honest woman; I understand, that not only a word binds, but conduct. And he may say that to me."
"Then tell him that thou hast tried to convince thyself that thou wert in love with him, but could not. In every case, that is the only way."
Silence followed; but both Marynia and Pani Emilia felt that they had not begun yet to talk of that which, if it did not concern both, concerned Pani Emilia most seriously. So, taking Marynia's hands, she said,--
"Now confess, Marynia, thou art coquetting with Mashko because thou art offended by Pan Stanislav?"
"That is true," answered Marynia, in a low voice.
"But does not this mean that the impression of his visit to Kremen, and of thy first conversations with him, are not effaced yet?"
"Better if it were."
Pani Emilia began to stroke her dark hair. "Thou wilt not believe how good, clever, and noble a man he is. For us he has some friendship. He has liked Litka always; this makes me grateful from my whole soul to him. But thou knowest what an unardent and lukewarm feeling friendship is usually. He in this regard even is exceptional. When Litka was sick in Reichenhall, wilt thou believe it, he brought a celebrated doctor from Monachium; but, not wishing to alarm us, he said that the doctor had come to another patient, and that we should take advantage of his presence. Think what care and kindness! He is extremely reliable, a man to be trusted; and he is energetic and just. There are intelligent men, but without energy; others have energy, but lack delicacy of heart. He unites one to the other. I forgot to tell thee that when Litka's property was in danger, and when my husband's brother set about saving it, he found the greatest aid in Pan Stanislav. If Litka were grown up, I would give her to no one in the world with such confidence as to him. I could not even recount to you how much kindness we have experienced from him."
"If as much as I have of evil, then very much."
"Marynia, he did not intend that. If thou couldst but know how he suffers for his rashness, and how sincerely he acknowledges his fault touching thee."
"He told me that himself," answered Marynia. "I, my Emilka, have pondered much over this,--to tell the truth, I have not thought of another thing; and I cannot find that he is to blame. In Kremen he was so pleasant that it seemed to me--to thee alone will I say this; for to thee I have written it already--that on the Sunday evening which he passed in our house I went to sleep with my head and heart so filled with him that I am ashamed to speak of it now. And I felt that one day longer, one friendly word more on his part, and I should love him for my lifetime. It seemed to me that he also-- The next day he went away in anger. The fault was my father's; it was mine also. I was able to understand that; and dost remember the letter I wrote thee at Reichenhall? Precisely the same trust which thou hast in him, I too had. He went away; I myself do not know why I thought, that he would return, or would write to me. He did not return; he did not write. Something told me that he would not take away Kremen; he took it. And afterward--I know that Pan Mashko talked with him openly, and he urged Pan Mashko, and assured him that he was thinking of nothing himself. Oh, my Emilia! If it please thee, he is not to blame; but how much harm has he done to me! Through him I have lost not only a beloved corner in which I was working; but more, I have lost faith in life, in people, in this,--that better and nobler things in this world conquer the low and the evil. I have become worse. I tell thee sincerely that I cannot find myself. He had the right to act as he has acted, I admit that; I say so, and do not say that he is guilty. But he has broken some vital spring in me. There is no cure for that; it cannot be mended. How can it? What is it to me that a change rose in him afterward; that he regrets what he did; that he would be ready even to marry me? What is that to me, if I, who almost loved him, not only do not love him now, but must guard against repugnance? That is worse than if I did not care for him. I know what thy wish is; but life must be built on love, not on repugnance. How can I give my hand to him with that feeling of offence in my soul and with that regret, that through him, guilty or not guilty, so much has been lost to me? Thou thinkest that I do not see his charm; but what can I do, when the more I see him, the more I am repulsed, and if I had to choose I should choose Pan Mashko, though he is less worthy? To everything good which thou canst say of him I agree; but to everything I answer: I do not love him; I never will love him."
Pani Emilia's eyes were filled with tears. "Poor Pan Stas," said she, as if to herself. And after a moment of silence she asked, "And art thou not sorry for him?"
"I am sorry for him when I think of him as he was in Kremen; I am sorry for him when I do not see him. But from the moment that I see him, I feel nothing but--repulsion."
"Yes; because thou knowest not how unhappy he was in Reichenhall, and now he is still more unhappy. He has no one in the world."
"He has thy friendship, and he loves Litka."
"My Marynia, that is something different. I am thankful to him from my whole soul for his attachment to Litka; but that is something different altogether, and thou knowest thyself that he loves thee a hundred times more than Litka."
In the chamber it had grown dark already; but soon the servant brought in a lamp, and, placing it on the table, went out. By the lamplight Pani Emilia beheld a whitish form crouched on the sofa near the door which led to Litka's room.
"Who is there? Is that Litka?"
"I, mamma."
In her voice there was something; Pani Emilia rose and went hurriedly toward her.
"When didst thou come out? What is the matter?"
"I feel so ill in some way."
Pani Emilia sat down on the sofa, and, drawing the little girl up to her, saw tears in her eyes.
"Art thou crying, Litus? What is the matter?"
"Oh, so sad, so sad!"
And, inclining her head to her mother's shoulder, she began to cry. She was in reality sad, for she had learned that "Pan Stas" was more unhappy than in Reichenhall, and that he loves Marynia a hundred times more than her. That evening, when going to sleep and in her nightdress, she nestled up to her mother's ear and whispered,--
"Mamma, mamma, I have one very great sin on my conscience."
"My poor little girl, what is troubling thee?"
She whispered in a still lower voice, "I do not like Panna Marynia."
Chapter XIII
Pani Emilia, with Litka and Marynia, and with them Plavitski, were going to the Bigiels to dine at their country house, which stood in a forest at the distance of one hour and a half from the city. It was a fine day in September; there were myriads of glittering spider-webs in the air and on the stubbles. Leaves still fresh and green adhered to the trees yet; here and there, through leafy openings, were visible as it were fountains and bouquets of red and yellow. That pale and faded autumn brought to Marynia's mind her occupations in the country, the odor of grain in the barns, the fields with stacks, and the clear extent of the meadows, bounded way off somewhere on the horizon by stretches of alder. She felt a yearning for that life and that composure, in comparison with which the city, notwithstanding the labor which seethed in its every-day existence, but which Marynia was unable to appreciate, seemed to her idle and empty. She felt now that that life in which she had found her own worth and merit was lost beyond return to her, and on the other hand there was not outlined before her anything that could take its place and redeem it. She might, it is true, return by becoming Pani Mashko; but her heart was filled with bitterness at that thought alone, and Mashko, with his Warsaw self-confidence, with his freckles and his side whiskers, with his aping an English lord, seemed to her simply repulsive. Never had she felt withal a deeper feeling against Pan Stanislav, who had taken Kremen from her, and put Mashko in place of it. She was disgusted with Mashko at that moment, and it seemed to her that she hated Pan Stanislav. She saw before her life with her father on the pavement of Warsaw, without an object, without occupation, without an ideal, with regret for the past and in view of the past, and with emptiness in the future. For this reason that calm autumn day, instead of quieting her, filled her with bitterness and sorrow. On the whole, the journey was not joyous. Litka sat in gloom because "Pan Stas" was not with them. Pani Emilia gave all attention to her, fearing lest that gloomy feeling might be connected with her health. Plavitski alone was in genuine good-humor, especially at the beginning of the journey. In his buttoned frock-coat, with a red flower in the buttonhole, with a light-colored overcoat, and with mustaches as pointed as needles, he thought himself beautiful, and was sprightly, since rheumatism, which he felt at times, was not troubling him, by reason of the good weather; secondly, before him sat one of the most presentable women in Warsaw, who, as he supposed, would not remain indifferent to so many charms, or in any case would esteem them in so far as she would be able to note them. Let her say at least to herself, "Oh, what a charming man that must have been!" In the worst event, Plavitski would have been satisfied with such a retrospective recognition. In this hope he was really enchanting; for at one time he was lofty and fatherly, at another sportive, setting out with the theory that young men of the present do not know how to act politely with ladies. In politeness, as he told Pani Emilia, he went as far as mythology, which was true under a certain aspect, for he looked at her as would a satyr.
But all this was received with a faint smile and with too little attention, hence he grew offended at last and began to speak of something else; namely, that, thanks to the relations of his daughter, he would become acquainted with the bourgeoisie, of which he was glad, however, for hitherto he had seen that society only on the stage, but it is necessary in life to meet the most varied kinds of people, for it is possible to learn something from each of them. He added finally, that it is the duty of certain circles not to estrange the commonalty, but on the contrary to gather them in, and thus plant in them sound principles; therefore he who had striven always to fulfil his social duties did not halt before that mission. Here the noble expression of his face took on a certain style of pensiveness, and in that state of feeling they drove up to the villa of the Bigiels.
It stood in a forest of unmixed pines, in the neighborhood of other villas, among old trees, which in places were felled, in places standing in groups of a few, or of a few tens. They seemed to wonder a little what such a new house was doing among them in the old forest stillness; but they hospitably shielded it from the wind; on fine days they surrounded it with balsamic air, permeated with the odor of gum and resin.
The Bigiels, with a row of children, came out to meet the guests. Pani Bigiel, who liked Marynia much, greeted her very cordially, desiring, besides, to prepossess her thereby for Pan Stanislav; she considered that the better Marynia understood how pleasant it might be for her among them, the less difficulty would she make.
Plavitski, who, during his previous stay with Marynia in Warsaw, had made the acquaintance of the Bigiels at Pani Emilia's, but had limited himself to leaving cards with them simply, showed himself now such a gracious prince as was possible only to the most refined man, who at the same time was fulfilling his mission of gathering in the "bourgeoisie."
"At the present day it is agreeable for any man to find himself under the roof of a person like you; but all the more for me, since my cousin, Polanyetski, has entered the career of commerce and is your partner."
"Polanyetski is a strong man," answered Bigiel, with directness, pressing the gloved hand of Plavitski.
The ladies retired for a moment to remove their hats; then, the air being quite warm, they returned to the veranda.
"Is Pan Stanislav not here yet?" inquired Pani Emilia.
"He has been here since morning," answered Bigiel; "but now he is visiting Pani Kraslavski. The place is near by," added he, turning to Marynia; "not even half a verst distant. There are summer residences everywhere about, and those ladies are our nearest neighbors."
"I remember Panna Terka Kraslavski since the time of the carnival," said Marynia. "She was always very pale."
"Oh, she is very pale yet. The past winter she spent in Pau."
Meanwhile the little Bigiels, who loved Litka wonderfully, drew her out to play in front of the house. The little girls showed her their gardens, made in the sand among the pines, in which gardens, to tell the truth, nothing would grow. These surveys were interrupted every little while by the girls, who stood on their toes and kissed Litka's cheeks; she, bending her beautiful flaxen head, returned these kisses with tenderness.
But the boys wanted their share as well. First, they stripped to the stalk the georgina at the house, gathering for Litka the most beautiful blossoms; then they disputed about this,--what play does Litka like; and they went to Pani Emilia for information. Edzio, who had the habit of speaking in a very loud voice, and closing his eyes at the same time, called out,--
"Please, Pani, I say that she likes ball better, only I don't know that you will let her play ball."
"Yes; if she will not run, for that hurts her."
"Oh, she will not, Pani; we will throw the ball so that it will go straight to her every time, then she will not run any. And if Yozio doesn't know how to throw that way, let her throw the ball."
"I want to play with her," said Yozio, pitifully. And at the very thought that he might be deprived of that pleasure, his mouth took the form of a horseshoe and began to quiver; but Litka anticipated his outburst of sorrow, saying,--
"I will throw to thee, Yozio; I'll throw to thee very often."
Yozio's eyes, already moist, began to smile at once.
"They will not hurt her," said Bigiel to Pani Emilia. "This is remarkable: the boys are what is called regular tearers; but with her they are wonderfully careful. It is Pan Stanislav who has trained them in this devotion to her."
"Such lovely children! there are few in the world like them," remarked Pani Emilia.
In a moment the children gathered in a group to arrange the play. In the middle of the group stood Litka, the oldest and the tallest; and though the little Bigiels were well-behaved children, she, with her sweet, poetic face and features, almost over-refined, seemed, among those ruddy, round faces, like a being from another planet. Pani Bigiel turned attention to that first of all.
"Is she not a real queen?" asked she. "I say truly that never can I look at her sufficiently."
"She is so noble in appearance," added Bigiel.
And Pani Emilia looked at her only one with a glance in which there was a sea of love. The children ran apart now, and stood in a great circle forming, on the gray background of fallen pine needles, parti-colored spots, which seemed as small under the immense pines as colored mushrooms.
Marynia went from the veranda and stood near Litka, to assist her in catching the ball, for which it was necessary to run, and in that way save her from exertion.
On the broad forest road leading to the villa, Pan Stanislav appeared at that moment. The children did not notice him at once; but he took in with a glance the veranda, as well as the space in front; and, seeing the bright robe of Marynia under a pine, he hastened his steps. Litka, knowing her mamma's alarm at every more animated movement which she made, and, not wishing to disquiet her for anything, stood almost without stirring from her place, and caught on her club only those balls which came directly toward her. Marynia ran after all that went farther. By reason of that running, her hair was loosened so that she had to arrange it; and, at the moment when Pan Stanislav was coming in at the gate, she stood bent backward somewhat and with arms raised to her head.
He did not take his eyes from her, and saw no one save her. She seemed to him on that broad space younger and smaller than usual, and therewith so maidenlike, so unapproachably attractive, so created for this, that a man should put his arms around her and press her to his boson; she was so feminine, so much the dearest creature on earth,--that never till that moment had he felt with such force how he loved her.
At sight of him, the children threw down their balls and clubs, and ran with a cry to meet him. The amusement was stopped. Litka at the first instant sprang also toward Pan Stas, but restrained herself on a sudden, and looked with her great eyes, now toward him, now toward Marynia.
"But thou art not rushing to meet Pan Polanyetski," said Marynia.
"No."
"Why, Litus?"
"Because--"
And her cheeks flushed somewhat, though the child did not know and did not dare to express her thought, which might be expressed in the words: "Because he does not love me any more; he loves only thee, and looks only at thee."
But he approached, freeing himself from the children, and repeating,--
"Do not hang on, little rogues, or I'll throw you."
And he extended his hand to Marynia, looking at her in the eyes, with an entreaty for a pleasant smile and a greeting even a whit less indifferent than usual; then he turned to Litka,--
"But is the dearest kitten well?"
At sight of him, and under the influence of his voice, she, forgetting all the suffering of her little heart, gave him both hands, saying,--
"Oh, yes, well; but yesterday Pan Stas did not come to us, and it was sad. To-day I'll take Pan Stas to mamma to give account."
After a while all were on the veranda.
"How are Pani Kraslavski and her daughter?" asked Pani Emilia.
"They are well, and are coming here after dinner," answered Pan Stanislav.
Just before dinner Professor Vaskovski came, bringing Bukatski, who had returned to Warsaw the evening before. His intimacy with the Bigiels permitted him to come without being invited; and the presence of Pani Emilia was too great a temptation to be resisted. He met her, however, without a trace of sentiment, in his usual jesting fashion; she was glad to see him, for he amused her with his strange and original way of uttering ideas.
"Were you not going to Monachium and Italy?" asked she, when they had sat down to dinner.
"Yes; but I forgot a card-knife in Warsaw, and came back to get it."
"Oh, that was a weighty reason."
"It always makes me impatient that people do everything from weighty reasons. What privilege have weighty reasons, that every man must accommodate himself to them? Besides, I gave, without wishing it, the last services to a friend, for yesterday I was at the funeral of Lisovich."
"What! that thin little sportsman?" inquired Bigiel.
"The same. And imagine that to this moment I cannot escape astonishment that a man who played the jester all his life could bring himself to such a serious thing as death. Simply I cannot recognize my Lisovich. At every step a man meets disappointment."
"But," said Pan Stanislav, "Pani Kraslavski told me that Ploshovski, he with whom all the women of Warsaw were in love, shot himself in Rome."
"He was a relative of mine," said Plavitski.
This news affected Pani Emilia mainly. She scarcely knew Ploshovski himself, but she had often seen his aunt, for whom her husband's elder brother was agent. She knew also how blindly this aunt loved her sister's son.
"My God, what a misfortune!" said she. "But is it true? A young man so capable, so wealthy--poor Panna Ploshovski!"
"And such a great estate will be without an heir," added Bigiel. "I know their property, for it is near Warsaw. Old Panna Ploshovski had two relatives: Pani Krovitski, though she was distant, and Leo Ploshovski, who was nearer. Neither are living now."
These words moved Plavitski again. He was indeed some sort of a distant relative of Panna Ploshovski, and even had seen her two or three times in his life; but there remained to him merely the remembrance of fear, for she had told him the bitter truth each time without circumlocution, or rather, speaking simply, had scolded him as much as he could hold. For this reason, in the further course of his life he avoided her most carefully, and all communication between them was stopped, though on occasions he liked to say a word in society of his relationship with a family so well known and important. He belonged to that category of people, numerous in our country, who are convinced that the Lord God created for their special use an easy road to fortune through inheritance, and who consider every hope of that kind as certain. He cast a solemn glance, therefore, on the assembly, and said,--
"Perhaps, too, Providence decided that those properties should pass to other hands, which are able to make better use of them."
"I met Ploshovski abroad once," said Pan Stanislav; "and on me he made the impression of a man altogether uncommon. I remember him perfectly."
"He was so brilliant and sympathetic," added Pani Bigiel.
"May God show him mercy!" said Professor Vaskovski. "I too knew him; he was a genuine Aryan."
"Azoryan," said Plavitski.
"Aryan," repeated the professor.
"Azoryan," corrected Plavitski, with emphasis and dignity.
And the two old men looked at each other with astonishment, neither knowing what the other wanted, and this to the great delight of Bukatski, who, raising his monocle, said,--
"How is that, Aryan or Azoryan?"
Pan Stanislav put an end to the misunderstanding by explaining that Azorya was the name of the family escutcheon of the Ploshovskis, that therefore it was possible to be at once an Aryan and an Azoryan; to which Plavitski agreed unwillingly, making the parenthetical remark that whoso bears a decent name, need not be ashamed of it, nor modify it.
Bukatski, turning to Pani Emilia, began to converse in his usual frigid tone,--
"One kind of suicide alone do I consider justifiable, suicide for love; therefore I am persuading myself for a number of years to it, but always in vain."
"They say that suicide is cowardice," put in Marynia.
"This is a reason too why I do not take my life: I am excessively brave."
"Let us not speak of death, but of life," said Bigiel, "and of that which is best in it, health. To the health of Pani Emilia!"
"And Litka," added Pan Stanislav.
Then he turned to Marynia and said, "To the health of our mutual friends!"
"Most willingly," answered Marynia.
Then he lowered his voice and continued, "For see, I consider them not only as friends of mine, but also--how is it to be expressed?--as advocates. Litka is a child yet, but Pani Emilia knows to whom friendship may be offered. Therefore if a certain person had a prejudice against me, even justly; if I had acted with that person not precisely as I should, or simply ill, and if that person knew me to be suffering from my act,--that person ought to think that I am not the worst of men, since Pani Emilia has sincere good-will for me."
Marynia was confused at once; she was sorry for him. He finished in a still lower voice,--
"But in truth I am suffering. This is a great question for me."
Before she had answered, Plavitski raised a health to Pani Bigiel, and made a whole speech, the substance of which was that the Queen of Creation is no other than woman; therefore all heads should incline before woman, as the queen, and, for this reason, he had bowed down all his life before woman in general, and at present he bowed before Pani Bigiel in particular.
Pan Stanislav from his soul wished him to choke, for he felt that he might have received some kind word from Marynia, and he felt that the moment had passed. In fact, Marynia went to embrace Pani Bigiel; on her return she did not resume the interrupted conversation, and he dared not ask her directly for an answer.
Immediately after dinner came Pani and Panna Kraslavski: the mother, a woman about fifty years old, animated, self-confident, talkative; the daughter, the complete opposite of her mother, formal, dry, cold, pronouncing "tek," instead of "tak," but for the rest with a full, though pale face, reminding one somewhat of the faces of Holbein's Madonnas.
Pan Stanislav began out of malice to entertain her; but, looking from time to time at the fresh face and blue eyes of Marynia, he said to himself, "If thou hadst given even one kind word! thou,--thou, the pitiless." And he grew more and more angry, so that when Panna Kraslavski said "memme" instead of "mamma," he inquired harshly,--
"Who is that?"
"Memme," however, displayed her whole supply of facts, or rather suppositions, concerning the suicide of Ploshovski.
"Imagine," said she, with warmth, "it came to my head at once that he shot himself because of the death of Pani Krovitski. Lord light her soul! she was a coquette, and I never liked her. She coquetted with him so that I was afraid to take Terka to any place where they were together, because her conduct was simply a bad example for such a young girl. What is true, is true! Lord light her soul! Terka, too, had no sympathy for her."
"Ah, Pani," said Pani Emilia, "I have always heard that she was an angel."
And Bukatski, who had never seen Pani Krovitski in his life, turned to Pani Kraslavski and said phlegmatically,--
"Madame, je vous donne ma parole d'honneur that she was an archangel."
Pani Kraslavski was silent a moment, not knowing what to answer; then, flushing up, she would have answered something sharp, were it not that Bukatski, as a man of wealth, might in a given event be a good match for Terka. Pan Stanislav enjoyed the same consideration in her eyes; and for these two exclusively she kept up summer relations with the Bigiels, whom she did not recognize when they met her by chance on the street.
"With gentlemen," said she, "every presentable woman is an angel or an archangel. I do not like this, even when they say it to me about Terka. Pani Krovitski might be a good person, but she had no tact; that is the whole question."
In this way conversation about Ploshovski dropped, the more since the attention of Pani Kraslavski was turned exclusively to Pan Stanislav, who was entertaining Panna Terka. He was entertaining her a little out of anger at himself, a little out of anger at Marynia, and he tried to convince himself that it was pleasant for him near her; he tried even to find in her a charm, and discovered that her neck was too slender and her eyes as it were quenched eyes, which grew lively and turned inquiringly at him when there was no place for a question. He observed, too, that she might be a quiet despot, for when the mother began to talk too loudly, Panna Terka put her glasses to her eyes and looked at her attentively; and under the influence of that look the mother lowered her voice, or grew silent altogether. In general, Panna Terka annoyed him immensely; and if he occupied himself more with her than he ever had before, he did so from sheer desperation, to rouse at least a shade of jealousy in Marynia. Even people of sound sense grasp at such vain methods when the misery of their feelings presses them too keenly. These methods produce usually results opposite to those intended, for they increase the difficulty of subsequent approach and explanations; besides, they merely strengthen the feeling cherished in the heart of the person using them. Toward the end Pan Stanislav longed so much for Marynia that he would have agreed to listen even to an unpleasant word from her, if he could only approach her and speak; and still it seemed to him more difficult now than an hour before. He drew a deep breath when the visit was over, and the guests were preparing to go. Before that, however, Litka approached her mother, and, putting her arms around her neck, whispered. Pani Emilia nodded, and then approached Pan Stanislav,--
"Pan Stanislav," said she, "if you do not think of spending the night here, ride with us. Marynia and I will take Litka between us, and there will be room enough."
"Very well. I cannot pass the night here; and I am very thankful," answered he; and, divining easily who the author of this plan was, he turned to Litka and said,--
"Thou, my best little kitten, thou."
She, holding to her mother's dress, raised to him her eyes, half sad, half delighted, asking quietly,--
"Is that good, Pan Stas?"
A few minutes later they started. After a fine day there came a night still finer, a little cool, but all bright and silvery from the moon. Pan Stanislav, for whom the day had passed grievously and in vain, breathed now with full breast, and felt almost happy, having before him two beings whom he loved very deeply, and one whom he loved beyond everything on earth. By the light of the moon he saw her face, and it seemed to him mild and peaceful. He thought that Marynia's feelings must be like her face in that moment; that perhaps her dislike of him was softening amid that general quiet.
Litka dropped into the depth of the seat, and appeared to be sleeping. Pan Stanislav threw a shawl, taken from Pani Emilia, over her feet, and they rode on a while in silence.
Pani Emilia began to speak of Ploshovski, the news of whose death had impressed her deeply.
"There is hidden in all that some unusually sad drama," said Pan Stanislav; "and Pani Kraslavski may be right in some small degree when she insists that these two deaths are connected."
"There is in suicide," said Marynia, "this ghastly thing, that one feels bound to condemn it; and while condemning there is an impression that there should be no sympathy for the misfortune."
"Sympathy," answered Pan Stanislav, "should be had for those who have feeling yet,--hence for the living."
The conversation ceased, and they went on again for some time in silence. After a while Pan Stanislav pointed to the lights in the windows of a house standing in the depth of a forest park, and said,--
"That is Pani Kraslavski's villa."
"I cannot forgive her for what she said of that unfortunate Pani Krovitski," said Pani Emilia.
"That is simply a cruel woman," added Pan Stanislav; "but do you know why? It is because of her daughter. She looks on the whole world as a background which she would like to make as black as possible, so that Panna Terka might be reflected on it the more brightly. Perhaps the mother had designs sometime on Ploshovski; perhaps she considered Pani Krovitski a hindrance,--hence her hatred."
"That is a nice young lady," said Marynia.
"There are persons for whom behind the world of social forms begins another and far wider world; for her nothing begins there, or rather everything ends. She is simply an automaton, in whom the heart beats only when her mother winds it with a key. For that matter, there are in society very many such young ladies; and even those who give themselves out for something different are in reality just like her. It is the eternal history of Galatea. Would you believe, ladies, that a couple of years since an acquaintance of mine, a young doctor, fell in love to distraction with that puppet, that quenched candle. Twice he proposed, and twice he was rejected; for those ladies looked higher. He joined the Holland service afterwards, and died there somewhere, with the fever doubtless; for at first he wrote to me inquiring about his automaton, and later on those letters ceased to come."
"Does she know of this?"
"She does; for as often as I see her, I speak of him. And what is characteristic is this,--that the memory of him does not ruffle her composure for an instant. She speaks of him as of any one else. If he expected from her even a posthumous sorrow, he was deceived in that also. I must show you, ladies, sometime, one of his letters. I strove to explain to him her feeling; he answered me, 'I estimate her coolly, but I cannot tear my soul from her.' He was a sceptic, a positive man, a child of the age; but it seems that feeling makes sport of all philosophies and tendencies. Everything passes; but feeling was, is, and will be. Besides, he said to me once, 'I would rather be unhappy with her than happy with another.' What is to be said in this case? The man looked at things soundly, but could not tear his soul away,--and that was the end of it."
This conversation ended also. They came out now on to a road planted with chestnut-trees, the trunks of which seemed rosy in the light of the carriage lamps.
"But if any one has misfortune, he must endure it," said Pan Stanislav, following evidently the course of his own thoughts.
Meanwhile Pani Emilia bent over Litka,--
"Art sleeping, child?" inquired she.
"No, mamma," answered Litka.
Chapter XIV
"I have never run after wealth," said Plavitski; "but if Providence in its inscrutable decrees has directed that even a part of that great fortune should come to our hands, I shall not cross its path. Of this not much will come to me. Soon I shall need four planks and the silent tear of my child, for whom I have lived; but here it is a question of Marynia."
"I would turn your attention to this," said Mashko, coldly,--"that, first of all, those expectations are very uncertain."
"But is it right not to take them into consideration?"
"Secondly, that Panna Ploshovski is living yet."
"But sawdust is dropping out of the old woman. She is as shrivelled as a mushroom!"
"Thirdly, she may leave her property for public purposes."
"But is it not possible to dispute such a will?"
"Fourthly, your relationship is immensely distant. In the same way all people in Poland are related to one another."
"She has no nearer relatives."
"But Polanyetski is your relative."
"No. God knows he is not! He is a relative of my first wife, not mine."
"And Bukatski?"
"Give me peace! Bukatski is a cousin of my brother-in-law's wife."
"Have you no other relatives?"
"The Gantovskis claim us, as you know. People say that which flatters them. But there is no need of reckoning with the Gantovskis."
Mashko presented difficulties purposely, so as to show afterward a small margin of hope, therefore he said,--
"With us people are very greedy for inheritances; and let any inheritance be in sight, they fly together from all sides, as sparrows fly to wheat. Everything in such cases depends on this: who claims first, what he claims, and finally through whom he claims. Remember that an energetic man, acquainted with affairs, may make something out of nothing; while, on the other hand, a man without energy or acquaintance with business, even if he has a good basis of action, may effect nothing."
"I know this from experience. All my life I have had business up to this." Here Plavitski drew his hand across his throat.
"Besides, you may become the plaything of advocates," added Mashko, "and be exploited without limit."
"In such a case I could count on your personal friendship for us."
"And you would not be deceived," answered Mashko, with importance. "Both for you and Panna Marynia I have friendship as profound as if you belonged to my family."
"I thank you in the name of the orphan," answered Plavitski; and emotion did not let him speak further.
Mashko put on dignity, and said, "But if you wish me to defend your rights, both in this matter, which, as I said, may prove illusive, and in other matters, then give me those rights." Here the young advocate seized Plavitski's hand,--
"Respected sir," continued he, "you will divine that of which I wish to speak; therefore hear me to the end patiently."
He lowered his voice; and although there was no one in the room, he began to speak almost in a whisper. He spoke with force, with dignity, and at the same time with great self-command, as befitted a man who never forgot who he was nor what he offered. Plavitski closed his eyes at moments; at moments he pressed Mashko's hand; finally, at the end of the conference, he said,--
"Come to the drawing-room; I will send in Marynia. I know not what she will say to you; in every case, let that come which God wills. I have at all times known your value; now I esteem you still more--and here!"
The arms of Plavitski opened wide, and Mashko bent toward them, repeating, not without emotion, but always with lofty dignity,--
"I thank, I thank--"
After a while he found himself in the drawing-room.
Marynia appeared with a face which had grown very pale; but she was calm. Mashko pushed a chair toward her, seated himself in another, and began,--
"I am here by the approval of your father. My words can tell you nothing beyond what my silence has told already, and which you have divined. But since the moment has come in which I should mention my feelings explicitly, I do this then with all confidence in your heart and character. I am a man who loves you, on whom you may lean; therefore I put in your hands my life, and I beg you from the bottom of my heart to consent to go with me."
Marynia was silent for a moment, as if seeking words, then she said,--
"I ought to answer you clearly and sincerely. This confession is for me very difficult; but I do not wish such a man as you to deceive himself. I have not loved you; I do not love you, and I will not be your wife, even should it come to me never to be any one's."
Then a still more prolonged silence followed. The spots on Mashko's face assumed a deeper hue, and his eyes cast cold steel gleams.
"This answer," said he, "is as decided as it is painful to me and unexpected. But will you not give yourself a few days to consider, instead of rejecting me decisively at this moment?"
"You have said that I divined your feelings; I had time then to make my decision, and the answer which I gave you, I give after thorough reflection."
Mashko's voice became dry and sharp now,--
"Do you think that by virtue of your bearing with me, I had not the right to make such a proposal?"
And he was sure in that moment that Marynia would answer that he understood her bearing incorrectly, that there was nothing in it authorizing him to entertain any hope,--in one word, that she would seek the crooked road taken usually by coquettes who are forced to redeem their coquetry by lying; but she raised her eyes to him and said,--
"My conduct with you has not been at times what it should have been; I confess my fault, and with my whole soul I beg pardon for it."
Mashko was silent. A woman who evades rouses contempt; a woman who recognizes her fault dashes the weapon from the hand of every opponent in whose nature, or even in whose education, there lies the least spark of knightly feeling. Besides this, there is one final method of moving the heart of a woman in such a ease, and that is to overlook her fault magnanimously. Mashko, though he saw before him a precipice, understood this, and determined to lay everything on this last card. Every nerve in him quivered from anger and offended self-love; but he mastered himself, took his hat, and, approaching Marynia, raised her hand to his lips.
"I knew that you loved Kremen," said he; "and I bought it for one purpose only, to lay it at your feet. I see that I went by a mistaken road, and I withdraw, though I do so with endless sorrow; I beg you to remember that. Fault on your part there has not been, and is not. Your peace is dearer to me than my own happiness; I beg you, therefore, as an only favor, not to reproach yourself. And now farewell."
And he went out.
She sat there motionless a long time, with a pale face and a feeling of oppression in her soul. She had not expected to find in him so many noble feelings. Besides, the following thought came to her head, "That one took Kremen from me to save his own; this one bought it to return it to me." And never before had Pan Stanislav been so ruined in her thoughts. At that moment she did not remember that Mashko had bought Kremen, not from Pan Stanislav, but from her father; second, that he had bought it profitably; third, that though he wished to return it, he intended to take it again with her hand, thus freeing himself from the payments which weighed on him; and finally, to take the matter as it was in reality, neither Pan Stanislav nor any one else had taken Kremen from her,--Plavitski had sold it because he was willing and found a purchaser. But at that moment she looked on the matter in woman fashion, and compared Mashko with Pan Stanislav, exalting the former beyond measure, and condemning the latter beyond his deserts. Mashko's action touched her so much that if she had not felt for him simply a repulsion, she would have called him back. For a while it seemed to her even that she ought to do so, but strength failed her.
She did not know either that Mashko went down the stairs with rage and despair in his soul; in fact, a precipice had opened before him. All his calculations had deceived him: the woman whom he loved really did not want him, and rejected him; and though she had striven to spare him in words, he felt humbled as never before. Whatever he had undertaken in life hitherto, he had carried through always with a feeling of his own power and reason, with an unshaken certainty of success. Marynia's refusal had taken that certainty from him. For the first time he doubted himself; for the first time he had a feeling that his star was beginning to pale, and that perhaps an epoch of defeats was beginning for him on all fields on which he had acted hitherto. That epoch had begun even. Mashko had bought Kremen on conditions exceptionally profitable, but it was too large an estate for his means. If Marynia had not rejected him, he would have been able to manage; he would not have needed to think of the life annuity for Plavitski, or the sum which, according to agreement, came to Marynia for Magyerovka. At present he had to pay Marynia, Pan Stanislav, and the debts on Kremen, which must be paid as soon as possible, for, by reason of usurious interest, they were increasing day by day, and threatening utter ruin. For all this he had only credit, hitherto unshaken, it is true, but strained like a chord; Mashko felt that, if that chord should ever snap, he would be ruined beyond remedy.
Hence at moments, besides sorrow for Marynia, besides the pain which a man feels after the loss of happiness, anger measureless, almost mad, bore him away, and also an unbridled desire for revenge. Therefore, when he was entering his residence, he muttered through his set teeth,--
"If thou do not become my wife, I'll not forgive thee for what thou hast done to me; if thou become my wife, I'll not forgive thee either."
Meanwhile Plavitski entered the room in which Marynia was sitting, and said,--
"Thou hast refused him, or he would have come to me before going."
"I have, papa."
"Without hope for the future?"
"Without hope. I respect him as no one in the world, but I gave him no hope."
"What did he answer?"
"Everything that such a high-minded person could answer."
"A new misfortune. Who knows if thou hast not deprived me of a morsel of bread in my old age? But I knew that no thought of this would come to thee."
"I could not act otherwise; I could not."
"I have no wish to force thee; and I go to offer my sufferings there where every tear of an old man is counted."
And he went to Lour's to look at men playing billiards. He would have consented to Mashko; but at the root of the matter he did not count him a very brilliant match, and, thinking that Marynia might do better, he did not trouble himself too much over what had happened.
Half an hour later Marynia ran in to Pani Emilia's.
"One weight at least has fallen from my heart," began she. "I refused Pan Mashko to-day decisively. I am sorry for him; he acted with me as nobly and delicately as only such a man could act; and if I had for him even a small spark of feeling, I would return to him to-day."
Here she repeated the whole conversation with Mashko. Even Pani Emilia could not reproach him with anything; she could not refuse a certain admiration, though she had blamed Mashko for a violent character, and had not expected that, in such a grievous moment for himself, he would be able to show such moderation and nobleness. But Marynia said,--
"My Emilka, I know thy friendship for Pan Stanislav, but judge these two men by their acts, not their words, and compare them."
"Never shall I compare them," answered Pani Emilia, "comparison is impossible in this case. For me, Pan Stanislav is a nature a hundred times loftier than Mashko, but thou judgest him unjustly. Thou, Marynia, hast no right to say, 'One took Kremen from me; the other wished to give it back.' Such was not the case. Pan Stanislav did not take it from thee at any time; but to-day, if he could, he would return it with all his heart. Prepossesion is talking through thee."
"Not prepossession, but reality, which nothing can change."
Pani Emilia seated Marynia before her, and said, "By all means, Marynia, prepossession, and I will tell thee why. Thou art not indifferent to Pan Stanislav now."
Marynia quivered as if some one had touched a wound which was paining her; and after a while she replied, with changed voice,--
"Pan Stanislav is not indifferent to me; thou art right. Everything which in me could be sympathy for him has turned to dislike; and hear, Emilka, what I will tell thee. If I had to choose between those two men, I should choose Mashko without hesitation."
Pani Emilia dropped her head; after a while Marynia's arms were around her neck.
"What suffering for me, that I cause thee such pain! but I must tell truth. I know that in the end thou, too, wilt cease to love me, and I shall be all alone in the world."
And really something like that had begun. The young women parted with embraces and kisses; but still, when they found themselves far from each other, both felt that something between them had snapped, and that their mutual relations would not be so cordial as hitherto.
Pani Emilia hesitated for a number of days whether to repeat Marynia's words to Pan Stanislav; but he begged her so urgently for the whole truth that at last she thought it necessary, and that she would better tell it. When all had been told, he said,--
"I thank you. If Panna Plavitski feels contempt for me, I must endure it; I cannot, however, endure this,--that I should begin to despise myself. As it is, I have gone too far. My dear lady, you know that if I have done her a wrong, I have tried to correct it, and gain her forgiveness. I do not feel bound to further duties. I shall have grievous moments; I do not hide that from you. But I have not been an imbecile, and am not; I shall be able to bring myself to this,--I shall throw all my feelings for Panna Plavitski through the window, as I would something not needed in my chamber, I promise that sacredly."
He went home filled with will and energy. It seemed to him that he could take that feeling and break it as he might break a cane across his knee. This impulse lasted a number of days. During that time he did not show himself anywhere, except at his office, where he talked with Bigiel of business exclusively. He worked from morning till evening and did not permit himself even to think about Marynia in the daytime.
But he could not guard himself from sleepless nights. Then came to him the clear feeling that Marynia might love him, that she would be the best wife for him, that he would be happy with her as never with any one else, and that he would love her as his highest good. The regret born of these thoughts filled his whole existence, and did not leave him any more, so that sorrow was consuming his life and his health, as rust consumes iron. Pan Stanislav began to grow thin; he saw that the destruction of a feeling gives one sure result,--the destruction of happiness. Never had he seen such a void before him, and never had he felt, with equal force, that nothing would fill it. He saw, too, that it was possible to love a woman not as she is, but as she might be; therefore his heart-sickness was beyond measure. But, having great power over himself, he avoided Marynia. He knew always when she was to be at Pani Emilia's, and then he confined himself at home.
It was only when Litka fell ill again that he began to visit Pani Emilia daily, passing hours with the sick child, whom Marynia attended also.
Chapter XV
But poor Litka, after a new attack, which was more terrible than any preceding it, could not recover. She spent days now lying on a long chair in the drawing-room; for at her request the doctor and Pani Emilia had agreed not to keep her in bed the whole time. She liked also to have Pan Stanislav sitting near her; and she spoke to him and her mother about everything that passed through her mind. With Marynia she was silent usually; but at times she looked at her long, and then raised her eyes to the ceiling, as if wishing to think out a thought, and give herself an account of something. More than once these meditations took place when she was left alone with her mother. On a certain afternoon she woke as if from a dream, and turning to her mother, said,--
"Mamma, sit near me here on the sofa."
Pani Emilia sat down; the child put her arms around her neck, and, resting her head on her shoulder, began to speak in a caressing voice, which was somewhat enfeebled.
"I wanted to ask mamma one thing, but I do not know how to ask it."
"What is thy wish, my dear child?"
Litka was silent a moment, collecting her thoughts; then she said,--
"If we love some one, mamma, what is it?"
"If we love some one, Litus?"
Pani Emilia repeated the question, not understanding well at first what the little girl was asking, but she did not know how to inquire more precisely.
"Then what is it, mamma?"
"It is this,--we wish that one to be well, just as I wish thee to be well."
"And what more?"
"And we want that person to be happy, want it to be pleasant in the world for that person, and are glad to suffer for that person when in trouble."
"And what more?"
"To have that one always with us, as thou art with me; and we want that one to love us, as thou lovest me."
"I understand now," said Litka, after a moment's thought; "and I think myself that that is true,--that it is that way."
"How, kitten?"
"See, mamma, when I was in Reichenhall, mamma remembers? at Thumsee I heard that Pan Stas loves Panna Marynia; and now I know that he must be unhappy, though he never says so."
Pani Emilia, fearing emotion for Litka, said,--
"Does not this talk make thee tired, kitten?"
"Oh, no, not a bit, not a bit! I understand now: he wants her to love him, and she does not love him; and he wants her to be near him always, but she lives with her father, and she will not marry him."
"Marry him?"
"Marry him. And he is suffering from that, mamma; isn't it true?"
"True, my child."
"Yes, I know all that; and she would marry him if she loved him?"
"Certainly, kitten; he is such a kind man."
"Now I know."
The little girl closed her eyes, and Pani Emilia thought for a while that she was sleeping; but after a time she began to inquire again,--
"And if he married Marynia, would he cease to love us?"
"No, Litus; he would love us always just the same."
"But would he love Marynia?"
"Marynia would be nearer to him than we. Why dost thou ask about this so, thou kitten?"
"Is it wrong?"
"No, there is nothing wrong in it, nothing at all; only I am afraid that thou wilt weary thyself."
"Oh, no! I am always thinking of Pan Stas anyhow. But mamma mustn't tell Marynia about this."
With these words ended the conversation, after which Litka held silence for a number of days, only she looked more persistently than before at Marynia. Sometimes she took her hand and turned her eyes to the young woman, as if wishing to ask something. Sometimes when Marynia and Pan Stanislav were near by, she gazed now on her, now on him, and then closed her lids. Often they came daily, sometimes a number of times in the day, wishing to relieve Pani Emilia, who permitted no one to take her place in the night at Litka's bedside; for a week she had been without rest at night, sleeping only a little in the day, when Litka herself begged her to do so. Still Pani Emilia was not conscious of the whole danger which threatened the little girl; for the doctor, not knowing what that crisis of the disease would be, whether a step in advance merely, or the end, pacified the mother the more decisively because Pan Stanislav begged him most urgently to do so.
She had a feeling, however, that Litka's condition was not favorable, and, in spite of assurances from the doctor, her heart sank more than once from alarm. But to Litka she showed always a smiling and joyous face, just as did Pan Stanislav and Marynia; but the little girl had learned already to observe everything, and Pani Emilia's most carefully concealed alarm did not escape her.
Therefore on a certain morning, when there was no one in her room but Pan Stanislav, who was occupied with inflating for her a great globe of silk, which he had brought as a present, the little girl said,--
"Pan Stas, I see sometimes that mamma is very anxious because I am sick."
He stopped inflating the globe, and answered,--
"Ai! she doesn't dream of it. What is working under thy hair? But it is natural for her to be anxious; she would rather have thee well."
"Why are all other children well, and I alone always sick?"
"Nicely well! Weren't the Bigiel children sick, one after another, with whooping-cough? For whole months the house was like a sheepfold. And didn't Yozio have the measles? All children are eternally sick, and that is the one pleasure with them."
"Pan Stas only talks that way, for children are sick and get well again." Here she began to shake her head. "No; that is something different. And now I must lie this way all the time, for if I get up my heart beats right away; and the day before yesterday, when they began to sing on the street, and mamma wasn't in the room, I went to the window a little while, and saw a funeral. I thought, 'I, too, shall die surely.'"
"Nonsense, Litus!" cried Pan Stanislav; and he began to inflate the globe quickly to hide his emotion, and to show the child how little her words meant. But she went on with her thought,--
"It is so stifling for me sometimes, and my heart beats so--mamma told me to say then 'Under Thy protection,' and I say it always, for I am terribly afraid to die! I know that it is nice in heaven, but I shouldn't be with mamma, only alone in the graveyard; yes, in the night."
Pan Stanislav laid down the globe suddenly, sat near the long chair, and, taking Litka's hand, said,--
"My Litus, if thou love mamma, if thou love me, do not think of such things. Nothing will happen to thee; but thy mother would suffer if she knew what her little girl's head is filled with. Remember that thou art hurting thyself in this way."
Litka joined her hands: "My Pan Stas, I ask only one thing, not more."
He bent his head down to her: "Well, ask, kitten, only something sensible."
"Would Pan Stas be very sorry for me?"
"Ah! but see what a bad girl!"
"My Pan Stas, tell me."
"I? what an evil child, Litus! Know that I love thee, love thee immensely. God preserve us! there is no one in the world that I should be so sorry for. But be quiet at least for me, thou suffering fly! thou dearest creature!"
"I will be quiet, kind Pan Stas."
And in the moment when Pani Emilia came, and he was preparing to go, she asked,--
"And Pan Stas is not angry with me?"
"No, Litus," answered Pan Stanislav.
When he had gone to the antechamber he heard a light knocking at the door; Pani Emilia had given orders to remove the bell. He opened it and saw Marynia, who came ordinarily in the evening. When she had greeted him, she asked,--
"How is Litka to-day?"
"As usual."
"Has the doctor been here?"
"Yes. He found nothing new. Let me help you!"
Saying this, he wished to take her cloak, but she was unwilling to accept his services, and refused. Having his heart full of the previous talk with Litka, he attacked her most unexpectedly,--
"What I offer you is simple politeness, nothing more; and even if it were something more, you might leave your repugnance to me outside this threshold, for inside is a sick child, whom not only I, but you, profess to love. Your response lacks not merely kindness, but even courtesy. I would take in the same way the cloak of any other woman, and know that at present I am thinking of Litka, and of nothing else."
He spoke with great passionateness, so that, attacked suddenly, Marynia was a little frightened; indeed, she lost her head somewhat, so that obediently she let her cloak be taken from her, and not only did not find in herself the force to be offended, but she felt that a man sincerely and deeply affected by alarm and suffering might talk so, therefore a man who was really full of feeling and was good at heart. Perhaps, too, that unexpected energy of his spoke to her feminine nature; it is enough that Pan Stanislav gained on her more in that moment than at any time since their meeting at Kremen, and never till then was she so strongly reminded of that active young man whom she had conducted once through the garden. The impression, it is true, was a mere passing one, which could not decide their mutual relations; but she raised at once on him her eyes, somewhat astonished, but not angry, and said,--
"I beg your pardon."
He had calmed himself, and was abashed now.
"No; I beg pardon of you. Just now Litka spoke of her death to me, and I am so excited that I cannot control myself; pray understand this, and forgive me."
Then he pressed her hand firmly, and went home.
Chapter XVI
On the following day Marynia offered to stay at Pani Emilia's till Litka should recover perfectly. Litka supported this offer, which Pani Emilia, after a short opposition, was forced to accept. In fact, she was dropping down from weariness; the health of the sick girl demanded unceasing and exceptional watchfulness, for a new attack might come at any instant. It was difficult to calculate or be sure that a servant, even the most faithful, would not doze at the very moment in which speedy assistance might save the child's life; hence the presence of Marynia was a real aid to the anxious mother, and calmed her.
As to Plavitski, he preferred to eat at the restaurant, and made no trouble. Marynia, moreover, went in every day to inquire about his health and bring domestic accounts into order; then she returned to Pani Emilia to sit half the night by the little girl.
In this way Pan Stanislav, who passed at Pani Emilia's all the time free from occupation, and received, or rather dismissed with thanks, those who came to inquire for Litka's health, saw Marynia daily. And she in truth amazed him; Pani Emilia herself did not show more anxiety for the child, and could not nurse her more carefully. In a week Marynia's face had grown pale from watching and alarm; there were dark lines beneath her eyes; but her strength and energy seemed to grow hourly. There was in her also so much sweetness and kindness, something so calm and delicate in the services which she rendered Litka, that the child, despite the resentment which she cherished in her little soul, began to be kind to her; and when she went for some hours to her father, Litka looked for her with yearning.
Finally the little girl's health seemed to improve in the last hours. The doctor permitted her to walk in the chamber and sit in an armchair, which on sunny days was pushed to the door opening on the balcony, so that she might look at the street and amuse herself with the movement of people and carriages.
At such times Pan Stanislav, Pani Emilia, and Marynia stood near her frequently; their conversation related to what was passing on the street. Sometimes Litka was wearied, and, as it were, thoughtful; at other times, however, her child nature got the upper hand, and everything amused her,--hence the October sun, which covered the roofs, the walls, and the panes of the shop windows with a pale gold; the dresses of the passers-by; the calling of the hucksters. It seemed that those strong elements of life, pulsating in the whirl of the city, entered the child and enlivened her. At times wonderful thoughts came to her head; and once, when before the balcony a heavy wagon was pushing past which carried lemon-trees in tubs, and these, though tied with chains, moved with the motion of the wagon, she said,--
"Their hearts do not palpitate." And then, raising her eyes to Pan Stanislav, she asked,--
"Pan Stas, do trees live long?"
"Very long; some of them live a thousand years."
"Oh, I would like to be a tree. And which does mamma like best?"
"The birch."
"Then I would like to be a little birch; and mamma would be a big birch, and we should grow together. And would Pan Stas like to be a birch?"
"If I could grow somewhere not far from the little birch."
Litka looked at him shaking her head somewhat sadly, said,--
"Oh, no! I know all now; I know near what birch Pan Stas would like to grow."
Marynia was confused, and dropped her eyes on her work; Pan Stanislav began to stroke lightly with his palm the little blond head, and said,--
"My dear little kitten, my dear, my--my--"
Litka was silent; from under her long eyelids flowed two tears, and rolled down her cheeks. After a while, however, she raised her sweet face, radiant with a smile,--
"I love mamma very much," said she, "and I love Pan Stas, and I love Marynia."
Chapter XVII
Professor Vaskovski inquired every day about the health of the little one; and though most frequently they did not receive him, he sent her flowers. Pan Stanislav, meeting him somewhere at dinner, began thanking him in Pani Emilia's name.
"Asters, only asters!" said Vaskovski. "How is she to-day?"
"To-day not ill, but, in general, not well; worse than in Reichenhall. Fear for each coming day seizes one; and at the thought that the child may be missing--"
Here Pan Stanislav stopped, for further words failed him; at last he burst out,--
"What is the use in looking for mercy? There is nothing but logic, which says that whoso has a sick heart must die. And may thunderbolts split such existence!"
Now came Bukatski, who, when he had learned what the conversation was, attacked the professor; even he, as he loved Litka, rebelled in his soul at thought of that death which was threatening her.
"How is it possible to deceive oneself so many years, and proclaim principles which turn into nothing in view of blind predestination?"
But the old man answered mildly: "How, beloved friends, estimate with your own measure the wisdom of God and His mercy? A man under ground is surrounded by darkness, but he has no right to deny that above him are sky, sun, heat, and light."
"Here is consolation," interrupted Pan Stanislav; "a fly couldn't live on such doctrines. And what is a mother to do, whose only and beloved child is dying?"
But the blue eyes of the professor seemed to look beyond the world. For a time he gazed straightforward persistently; then he said, like a man who sees something, but is not sure that he sees it distinctly, "It appears to me that this child has fixed herself too deeply in people's hearts to pass away simply, and disappear without a trace. There is something in this,--something was predestined to her; she must accomplish something, and before that she will not die."
"Mysticism," said Bukatski.
But Pan Stanislav interrupted: "Oh, that it were so, mysticism or no mysticism! Oh, that it were so! A man in misfortune grasps even at a shadow of hope. It never found place in my head that she had to die."
But the professor added, "Who knows? she may survive all of us."
Polanyetski was in that phase of scepticism in which a man recognizes certainty in nothing, but considers everything possible, especially that everything which at the given time his heart yearns for; he breathed therefore more easily, and received certain consolation.
"May God have mercy on her and Pani Emilia!" said he. "I would give money for a hundred Masses if I knew they would help her."
"Give for one, if the intention be sincere."
"I will, I will! As to the sincerity of intention, I could not be more sincere if the question involved my own life."
Vaskovski smiled and said, "Thou art on the good road, for thou knowest how to love."
And all left relieved in some way. Bukatski, if he was thinking of something opposed to what Vaskovski had said, did not dare mention it; for when people in presence of real misfortune seek salvation in faith, scepticism, even when thoroughly rooted, pulls its cap over its ears, and is not only cowardly, but seems weak and small.
Bigiel, who came in at that moment, saw more cheerful faces, and said,--
"I see by you that the little one is not worse."
"No, no," said Pan Stanislav; "and the professor told us such wholesome things that he might be applied to a wound."
"Praise be to God! My wife gave money for a Mass to-day, and went then to Pani Emilia's. I will dine with you, for I have leave; and, since Litka is better, I will tell you another glad news."
"What is it?"
"Awhile ago I met Mashko, who, by the way, will be here soon; and when he comes, congratulate him, for he is going to marry."
"Whom?" asked Pan Stanislav.
"My neighbor's daughter."
"Panna Kraslavski?"
"Yes."
"I understand," said Bukatski; "he crushed those ladies into dust with his grandeur, his birth, his property, and out of that dust he formed a wife and a mother-in-law for himself."
"Tell me one thing," said the professor; "Mashko is a religious man--"
"As a conservative," interrupted Bukatski, "for appearance' sake."
"And those ladies, too," continued Vaskovski.
"From habit--"
"Why do they never think of a future life?"
"Mashko, why dost thou never think of a future life?" cried Bukatski, turning to the advocate, who was coming in at that moment.
Mashko approached them and asked, "What dost thou say?"
"I will say Tu felix, Mashko, nube!" (Thou, Mashko, art fortunate in marriage!)
Then all began to offer congratulations, which he received with full weight of dignity; at the end he said,--
"My dear friends, I thank you from my whole heart; and, since ye all know my betrothed, I have no doubt of the sincerity of your wishes."
"Do not permit thyself one," said Bukatski.
"But Kremen came to thee in season," interjected Pan Stanislav.
Indeed, Kremen had come to Mashko in season, for without it he might not have been accepted. But for that very cause the remark was not agreeable; hence he made a wry face, and answered,--
"Thou didst make that purchase easy; sometimes I am thankful to thee, and sometimes I curse thee."
"Why so?"
"For thy dear Uncle Plavitski is the most annoying, the most unendurable figure on earth, omitting thy cousin, who is a charming young lady; but from morning till evening she rings changes on her never to be sufficiently regretted Kremen, through all the seven notes, adding at each one a tear. Thou art seldom at their house; but, believe me, to be there is uncommonly wearisome."
Pan Stanislav looked into his eyes and answered, "Listen, Mashko: against my uncle I have said everything that could hit him; but it does not follow, therefore, that I am to listen patiently if another attacks Plavitski, especially a man who has made profit by him. As to Panna Marynia, she is sorry, I know, for Kremen; but this proves that she is not an empty puppet, or a manikin, but a woman with a heart; dost understand me?"
A moment of silence followed. Mashko understood perfectly whom Pan Stanislav had in mind when he mentioned the empty doll and manikin; hence the freckles on his face became brick-colored, and his lips began to quiver. But he restrained himself. He was in no sense a coward; but even the man who is most daring has usually some one with whom he has no wish to quarrel, and for Mashko Polanyetski was such a one. Therefore, shrugging his shoulders, he said,--
"Why art thou angry? If that is unpleasing to thee--"
But Pan Stanislav interrupted, "I am not angry; but I advise thee to remember my words." And he looked him in the eyes again.
Mashko thought, "If thou wilt have an adventure anyhow, thou canst have it."
"Thy words," said he, "I can remember; only do thou take counsel also from me. Permit not thyself to speak in that tone to me, else I might forget myself also, and call thee to reckoning."
"What the deuce--?" began Bukatski. "What is the matter with thee?"
But Pan Stanislav, in whom irritation against Mashko has been gathering for a long time, would beyond doubt have pushed matters to extremes had not Pani Emilia's servant rushed into the room at that moment.
"I beg," said he, with a panting voice; "the little lady is dying!"
Pan Stanislav grew pale, and, seizing his hat, sprang to the door. A long, dull silence followed, which Mashko interrupted at last.
"I forgot," said he, "that everything should be forgiven him at present."
Vaskovski, covering his eyes with his hands, began to pray. At length he raised his head and said,--
"God alone has bridled death, and has power to restrain it."
A quarter of an hour later, Bigiel received a note from his wife with the words, "The attack has passed."
Chapter XVIII
Pan Stanislav hurried to Pani Emilia's, fearing that he would not find Litka living; for the servant told him on the way that the little lady was in convulsions, and dying. But when he arrived, Pani Emilia ran to meet him, and from the depth of her breast threw out in one breath the words, "Better! better!"
"Is the doctor here?"
"He is."
"But the little one?"
"Is sleeping."
On the face of Pani Emilia the remnants of fear were struggling with hope and joy. Pan Stanislav noticed that her lips were almost white, her eyes dry and red, her face in blotches; she was mortally wearied, for she had not slept for twenty-four hours. But the doctor, a young man, and energetic, looked on the danger as passed for the time. Pani Emilia was strengthened by what he told her in presence of Pan Stanislav, especially this: "We should not let it come to a second attack, and we will not."
There was real consolation in these words, for evidently the doctor considered that they were able to ward off another attack; still there was a warning that another attack might be fatal. But Pani Emilia grasped at every hope, as a man falling over a precipice grasps at the branches of trees growing out on the edge of it.
"We will not; we will not!" repeated she, pressing the doctor's hand feverishly.
Pan Stanislav looked into his eyes unobserved, wishing to read in them whether he said this to pacify the mother, or on the basis of medical conviction, and asked as a test,--
"You will not leave her to-day?"
"I do not see the least need of staying," answered he. "The child is exhausted, and is like to sleep long and soundly. I will come to-morrow, but to-day I can go with perfect safety." Then he turned to Pani Emilia,--
"You must rest, too. All danger has passed; the patient should not see on your face any suffering or alarm, for she might be disturbed, and she is too weak to endure that."
"I could not fall asleep," said Pani Emilia.
The doctor turned his pale blue eyes to her, and, gazing into her face with a certain intensity, said slowly,--
"In an hour you will lie down, and will fall asleep directly; you will sleep unbrokenly for six or eight hours,--let us say eight. To-morrow you will be strong and refreshed. And now good-night."
"But drops to the little one, if she wakes?" asked Pani Emilia.
"Another will give the drops; you will sleep. Good-night." And he took farewell.
Pan Stanislav wished to follow him to inquire alone about Litka, but he thought that a longer talk of that kind might alarm Pani Emilia; hence he preferred to omit it, promising himself that in the morning he would go to the doctor's house and talk there with him. After a while, when he was alone with Pani Emilia, he said,--
"Do as the doctor directed; you need rest. I promise to go to Litka's room now, and I will not leave her the whole night."
But Pani Emilia's thoughts were all with the little girl; so, instead of an answer, she said to him directly,--
"Do you know, after the attack, she asked several times for you before she fell asleep. And for Marynia too. She fell asleep with the question, 'Where is Pan Stas?'"
"My poor beloved child, I should have come anyhow right after dinner. I flew here barely alive. When did the attack begin?"
"In the forenoon. From the morning she was gloomy, as if foreboding something. You know that in my presence she says always that she is well; but she must have felt ill, for before the attack she sat near me and begged me to hold her hand. Yesterday, I forgot to tell you that she put such strange questions to me: 'Is it true,' inquired she, 'that if a sick child asks for a thing it is never refused?' I answered that it is not refused unless the child asks for something impossible. Some idea was passing through her head evidently, for in the evening, when Marynia ran in for a moment, she put like questions to us. She went to sleep in good humor, but this morning early she complained of stifling. It is lucky that I sent for the doctor before the attack, and that he came promptly."
"It is the greatest luck that he went away with such certainty that the attack would not be repeated. I am perfectly sure that that is his conviction," answered Pan Stanislav.
Pani Emilia raised her eyes: "The Lord God is so merciful, so good, that--"
In spite of all her efforts, she began to sob, for repressed alarm and despair were changed to joy in her, and she found relief in tears. In that noble and spiritualized nature, innate exaltation disturbed calm thought; by reason of this, Pani Emilia never gave an account to herself of the real state of affairs; now, for example, she had not the least doubt that Litka's illness had ended once for all with this recent attack, and that thenceforth a time of perfect health would begin for the child.
Pan Stanislav had neither the wish nor the heart to show her a middle road between delight and despair; his heart rose with great pity for her, and there came to him one of those moments in which he felt more clearly than usually how deeply, though disinterestedly, he was attached to that enthusiastic and idealistic woman. If she had been his sister, he would have embraced her and pressed her to his bosom; as it was, he kissed her delicate, thin hands, and said,--
"Praise be to God; praise be to God! Let the dear lady think now of herself, and I will go to the little one and not stir till she wakes." And he went.
In Litka's chamber there was darkness, for the window-blinds were closed, and the sun was going down. Only through the slats did some reddish rays force their way; these lighted the chamber imperfectly and vanished soon, for the sky began to grow cloudy. Litka was sleeping soundly. Pan Stanislav, sitting near her, looked on her sleeping face, and at the first moment his heart was oppressed painfully. She was lying with her face toward the ceiling; her thin little hands were placed on the coverlid; her eyes were closed, and under them was a deep shadow from the lashes. Her pallor, which seemed waxen in that reddish half-gloom, and her open mouth, finally, the deep sleep,--gave, her face the seeming of such rest as the faces of the dead have. But the movement of the ruffles on her nightdress showed that she was living and breathing. Her respiration was even calm and very regular. Pan Stanislav looked for a long time at that sick face, and felt again, with full force, what he had felt often, when he thought of himself,--namely, that nature had made him to be a father; that, besides the woman of his choice, children might be the immense love of his life, the chief object and reason of his existence. He understood this, through the pity and love which he felt at that moment for Litka, who, a stranger to him by birth, was as dear to him then as would have been his own child.
"If she had been given to me," thought he; "if she lacked a mother,--I would take her forever, and consider that I had something to live for."
And he felt also that were it possible to make a bargain with death, he would have given himself without hesitation to redeem that little "kitten," over whom death seemed then to be floating like a bird of prey over a dove. Such tenderness seized him as he had not felt till that hour; and that man, of a character rather quick and harsh, was ready to kiss the hands and head of that child, with a tenderness of which not even every woman's heart is capable.
Meanwhile it had grown dark. Soon Pani Emilia came in, shading with her hand a blue night-lamp.
"She is sleeping?" asked she, in a low voice, placing the lamp on the table beyond Litka's head.
"She is," answered Pan Stanislav, in an equally low voice.
Pani Emilia looked long at the sleeping child.
"See," whispered Pan Stanislav, "how regularly and calmly she breathes. To-morrow she will be healthier and stronger."
"Yes," answered the mother, with a smile.
"Now it is your turn. Sleep, sleep! otherwise I shall begin to command without pity."
Her eyes continued to smile at him thankfully. In the mild blue light of the night-lamp she seemed like an apparition. She had a perfectly angelic face; and Pan Stanislav thought in spite of himself that she and Litka looked really like forms from beyond the earth, which by pure chance had wandered into this world.
"Yes," answered she; "I will rest now. Marynia has come, and Professor Vaskovski. Marynia wishes absolutely to remain."
"So much the better. She manages so well near the little girl. Good-night."
"Good-night."
Pan Stanislav was alone again, and began to think of Marynia. At the very intelligence that he would see her soon he could not think of aught else; and now he put the question to himself: "In what lies this wonderful secret of nature in virtue of which I, for example, did not fall in love with Pani Emilia, decidedly more beautiful than Marynia, likely better, sweeter, more capable of loving,--but with that girl whom I know incomparably less, and, justly or unjustly, honor less?" Still with every approach of his to Marynia there rose in him immediately all those impulses which a man may feel at sight of a chosen woman, while a real womanly form, like that of Pani Emilia, made no other impression on him than if she had been a painting or a carving. Why is this, and why, the more culture a man has, the more his nerves become subtile, and his sensitiveness keener, the greater difference does he make between woman and woman? Pan Stanislav had no answer to this save the one which that doctor in love with Panna Kraslavski had given him: "I estimate her coolly, but I cannot tear my soul from her." That was rather the description of a phenomenon than an answer, for which, moreover, he had not the time, since Marynia came in at that moment.
They nodded in salutation; he raised a chair then, and put it down softly at Litka's bed, letting Marynia know by a sign that she was to sit there. She began to speak first, or rather, to whisper.
"Go to tea now. Professor Vaskovski is here."
"And Pani Emilia?"
"She could not sit up. She said that it was a wonder to her, but she must sleep."
"I know why: the doctor hypnotized her, and he did well. The little girl is indeed better."
Marynia gazed into his eyes; but he repeated,--
"She is really better--if the attack will not return, and there is hope that it will not."
"Ah! praise be to God! But go now and drink tea."
He preferred, however, to whisper to her near by and confidentially, so he said,--
"I will, I will; but later. Let us arrange meanwhile so that you may rest. I have heard that your father is ill. Of course you have been watching over him."
"Father is well now, and I wish to take Emilia's place absolutely. She told me that the servants had not slept either all last night, for the child's condition was alarming before the attack. It is needful now that some one be on the watch always. I should wish, therefore, so to arrange that we--that is, I, you, and Emilka--should follow in turn."
"Very well; but to-day I will remain. If not here, I shall be at call in the next chamber. When did you hear of the attack?"
"I did not hear of it. I came as I do usually in the evening to learn what was to be heard."
"Pani Emilia's servant hurried to me while I was dining. You can imagine easily how I flew hither. I was not sure of finding her alive. What wonder, since during dinner I talked almost all the time of Litka with Bukatski and Vaskovski, till Mashko came with the announcement of his marriage."
"Is Mashko going to marry?"
"Yes. The news has not gone around yet; but he announced it himself. He marries Panna Kraslavski; you remember her?"
"She who was at the Bigiels that evening. She is a good match for Mashko, Panna Kraslavski."
There was silence for a moment. Marynia, who, not loving Mashko, had rejected his hand, but who more than once had reproached herself for her conduct with regard to him, thinking that she had exposed him to deception and suffering, could find only comfort in the news that the young advocate had borne the blow so easily. Still the news astonished her for the time, and also wounded her. Women, when they sympathize with some one, wish first that some one to be really unhappy, and, secondly, they wish to alleviate the misfortune themselves; when it turns out that another is able to do that, they undergo a certain disillusion. Marynia's self-love was wounded also doubly. She had not thought that it would be so easy to forget her; hence she had to confess that her idea of Mashko as an exceptional man had no basis. He had been for her hitherto a kind of ace in the game against Pan Stanislav; now he had ceased to be that. She felt, therefore, let matters be as they might, somewhat conquered. This did not prevent her, it is true, from informing Pan Stanislav, with a certain accent of truth, that his news caused her sincere and deep joy, but at bottom she felt in some sort offended by him because he had told her.
For a certain time Pan Stanislav had acted with her very reservedly, and in nothing had he betrayed what was happening within him. He did not feign to be too cool, for they had to meet; therefore, in meeting her he maintained even a certain kindly freedom, but for this very reason she judged that he had ceased to love her, and such is human nature, that though the old offence was existing yet, and had even increased in the soul of the young woman, though her first disillusion had changed as it were into a spring, giving forth new bitterness continually, still the thought that her repugnance was indifferent to him irritated Marynia. Now it seemed to her that Pan Stanislav must even triumph over her mistake as to Mashko; and at this, that in every case she, who shortly before had the choice between Mashko and him, has that choice no longer, and will fall, as it were, into a kind of neglect somewhat humiliating.
But he was far from such thoughts. He was glad, it is true, that Marynia should know that, by exalting Mashko above him, she had been mistaken fundamentally; but he had not dreamed even of taking pleasure in this or triumphing because of her isolation, for at every moment and at that time more than any other he was ready to open his arms to her, press her to his bosom, and love her. He was working, it is true, continually and even with stubbornness to break in himself those feelings; but he did this only because he saw no hope before him, and considered it an offence against his dignity as a man to put all the powers of his soul and heart into a feeling which was not returned. To use his own expression, he wished to avoid surrender, and he did avoid surrender, to the best of his power; but he understood perfectly that such a struggle exhausts, and that even if it ends with victory it brings a void, instead of happiness. Besides, he was far yet from victory. After all his efforts he had arrived at this only,--that his feeling was mingled with bitterness. Such a ferment dissolves love, it is true, for the simple reason that it poisons it; and in time this bitterness might have dissolved love in Pan Stanislav's heart. But what an empty result! Sitting then near Marynia and looking at her face and head, shone on by the light of the lamp, he said to himself, "If only she wished!" That thought made him angry; but since he wanted to be sincere with himself, he had to confess that if only she wished he would bend to her feet with the greatest readiness. What an empty result, then, and what a position without escape! For he felt that the misunderstanding between them had increased so much that even if Marynia desired a return of those moments passed in Kremen, self-love and fear of self-contradiction would close her lips. Their relations had become so entangled that they might fall in love more easily a second time than come to an understanding.
After a short conversation there was silence between them, interrupted only by the breathing of the sick child and the slight, but mournful, sounds of the window-panes, on which fine rain was striking. Outside, the night had grown wet; it was autumnal, bringing with it oppression, gloom, pessimism, and discontent. Equally gloomy seemed that chamber, in whose dark corners death appeared to be lurking. Hour followed hour more slowly. All at once forebodings seized Pan Stanislav. He looked at Litka on a sudden, and it seemed to him madness to suppose that she could recover. Vain was watching! vain were hopes and illusions! That child must die! she must all the more surely, the dearer she was. Pani Emilia will follow her; and then there will be a desert really hopeless. What a life! See, he, Polanyetski, has those two, the only beings in the world who love him,--beings for whom he is something; therefore it is clear that he must lose them. With them there would be something in life to which he could adhere; without them there will be only nothingness and a certain kind of future, blind, deaf, unreasoning, with the face of an idiot.
The most energetic man needs some one to love him. Otherwise he feels death within, and his energy turns against life. A moment like that had come now to Pan Stanislav. "I do not know absolutely why I should not fire into my forehead," thought he, "not from despair at losing them, but because of the nothing without them. If life must be senseless, there is no reason to permit this senselessness, unless through curiosity to learn how far it can go." But this thought did not appear in him as a plan; it was rather the effort of a man writhing at the chain of misfortune, a burst of anger in a man seeking some one against whom to turn. In Pan Stanislav this anger turned suddenly on Marynia. He did not know himself why; but it seemed to him at once that all the evil which had happened, had happened through her. She had brought into their circle a dislike not there before, suffering not there before, and had thrown, as it were, some stone into their smooth water; and now the wave, which was spreading more and more widely, covered not only him, but Pani Emilia and Litka. As a man governing himself by judgment, not by nerves, he understood how vain were reproaches of this sort; still he could not put down the remembrance that before Marynia came it was better in every way, and so much better even, that he might consider that as a happy period of his life. He loved then only Litka, with that untroubled, fatherly feeling, which did not and could not bring bitterness for a moment. Who knows, besides, if in time he might not have been able to love Pani Emilia? She, it is true, had not for him other feelings than those of friendship, but perhaps only because he did not desire other feelings. High-minded women frequently refuse themselves feelings which go beyond the boundary of friendship, so as not to render difficult and involved the life of some one who might, but does not wish to become dear. Meanwhile in the depth of the soul lies a calm secret melancholy; they find sweetness and consolation in the tenderness permitted by friendship.
Pan Stanislav, by becoming acquainted with Marynia, gave her at once the best part of his feelings. Why? for what purpose? Only to give himself suffering. Now, to complete the misfortune, that Litka, the one ray of his life, had died, or might die any moment. Pan Stanislav looked again at her, and said in his soul,--
"Remain even, thou dear child; thou knowst not how needful thou art to me and to thy mother. God guard thee; what a life there will be without thee!"
Suddenly he saw that the eyes of the child were looking at him. For a while he thought himself mistaken, and did not dare to stir; but the little maiden smiled, and finally she whispered,--
"Pan Stas."
"It is I, Litus. How dost thou feel?"
"Well; but where is mamma?"
"She will come right away. We had a great struggle to make her go to bed to sleep, and we hardly persuaded her."
Litka turned her head, and, seeing Marynia, said,--
"Ah! is that Aunt Marynia?"
For some time she had called her aunt.
Marynia rose, and, taking the vial which stood on the shelf, poured drop after drop into a spoon; then she gave them to Litka, who, when she had finished drinking, pressed her lips to Marynia's forehead.
A moment of silence followed; then the child said, as if to herself,--
"There is no need of waking mamma."
"No; no one will wake her," answered Pan Stanislav. "All will be as Litus wishes."
And he began to stroke her hand, which was lying on the coverlid. She looked at him, repeating, as was her wont,--
"Pan Stas, Pan Stas!"
For a while it seemed that she would fall asleep; but evidently the child was thinking of something with great effort, for her brows rose. At last, opening widely her eyes, she looked now at Pan Stanislav, and now at Marynia. In the room nothing was heard save the sound of rain on the windows.
"What is the matter with the child?" asked Marynia.
But she, clasping her hands, whispered in a voice barely audible, "I have a great, great prayer to Aunt Marynia, but--I am afraid to say it."
Marynia bent her mild face toward the little girl.
"Speak, my love; I will do everything for thee."
Then the little girl, seizing her hand, and pressing it to her lips, whispered,--
"I want Aunt Marynia to love Pan Stas."
In the silence which followed after these words was to be heard only the somewhat increased breathing of the little girl. At last the calm voice of Marynia was heard,--
"Very well, my love."
A spasm of weeping seized Pan Stanislav suddenly by the throat; everything, not excluding Marynia, vanished from his eyes before that child, who, at such a moment, sick, powerless, and in the face of death, thought only of him.
Litka asked further,--
"And will aunt marry Pan Stas?"
In the light of the blue lamp Marynia's face seemed very pale; her lips quivered, but she answered without hesitation,--
"I will, Litus."
The little girl raised Marynia's hand to her lips a second time; her head fell on the pillow, and she lay for a while with closed lids; after some time, however, two tears flowed down her cheeks. Then followed a longer silence; the rain was beating against the window-panes. Pan Stanislav and Marynia were sitting motionless without looking at each other; both felt, however, that their fates had been decided that night, but they were as if dazed by what had happened. In the chaos of thought and feelings neither of them knew how to note or indicate what was passing within them. In that silence, which was kept instinctively, lest perchance they might look each other in the eyes, hour followed hour. The clock struck midnight, then one; about two Pani Emilia slipped in like a shadow.
"Is she sleeping?" inquired she.
"No, mamma," answered Litka.
"Art thou well?"
"Well, mamma."
And when Pani Emilia sat near her bed, the little one embraced her neck; and, nestling her yellow head at her breast, she said,--
"I know now, mamma, that when a sick child begs for anything, people never refuse."
And she nestled up to her mother some time yet; then, drawing out each word as sleepy children do, or very tired ones, she said,--
"Pan Stas will not be sad any more; and I will tell mamma why--"
But here her head became heavy on her mother's breast, and Pani Emilia felt the cold sweat coming on the hands of the child, as well as on her temples.
"Litus!" exclaimed she, with a suppressed, frightened voice.
And the child began,--
"I feel so strange, so weak--"
Her thoughts grew dim; and after a while she continued,--
"Oh, the sea is rolling--such a big sea!--and we are all sailing on it. Mamma! mamma!"
And a new attack came, dreadful, pitiless. The little girl's body was drawn in convulsions, and her eyesight turned toward the back of her head. There was no chance of illusion this time; death was at hand, and visible in the pale light of the lamp, in the dark corner of the room, in the sound of the window-panes, stricken by the rain, and in the noise of the wind, full of terrified voices and cries.
Pan Stanislav sprang up and ran for the doctor. In a quarter of an hour both appeared before the closed doors of the room, uncertain whether the child was living yet, and they disappeared through it immediately,--first Pan Stanislav, then the doctor, who, from the moment that they had pulled him out of bed, kept repeating one phrase, "Is it fear or emotion?"
Some of the servants, with sleepy and anxious faces, were gathered at the door, listening; and in the whole house followed a silence, long continued, which weighed down like lead.
It was broken at last by Marynia, who was the first to come out of the closed chamber, her face as pale as linen, and she said hurriedly,--
"Water for the lady! the little lady is living no longer."
Chapter XIX
Autumn, in its last days, smiles on people at times with immense sadness, but mildly, like a woman dying of decline. It was on such a mild day that Litka's funeral took place. There is pain mingled with a certain consolation in this,--that those left behind think of their dead and feel the loss of them. Pan Stanislav, occupied with the funeral, was penetrated by that calm and pensive day with still greater sadness; but, transferring Litka's feelings to himself, he thought that the child would have wished just such a day for her burial, and he found in this thought a certain solace. Till that moment he had not been able simply to measure his sorrow; such knowledge comes later, and begins only when the loved one is left in the graveyard, and a man returns by himself to his empty house. Besides, preparations for the funeral had consumed Pan Stanislav's whole time. Life has surrounded with artificial forms, and has complicated, such a simple act as death. Pan Stanislav wished to show Litka that last service, which, moreover, there was no one else to perform. All those springs of life through which man thinks, resolves, and acts, were severed in Pani Emilia by the death of her child. This time the wind seemed too keen for the fleece of the lamb. Happily, however, excessive pain either destroys itself, or benumbs the human heart. This happened with Pani Emilia. Pan Stanislav noticed that the predominant expression of her face and eyes was a measureless, rigid amazement. As in her eyes there were no tears, so in her mouth there were no words,--merely a kind of whisper, at once tragic and childish, showing that her thought did not take in the misfortune, but hovered around the minutiæ accompanying it; she seized at these, and attended to them with as much carefulness as if her child were alive yet. In the room, now turned into a chamber of mourning, Litka, reposing on a satin cushion amid flowers, could want nothing; meanwhile the heart of the mother, grown childish from pain, turned continually to this: what could be lacking to Litka? When they tried to remove her from the body, she offered no resistance; she merely lost the remnant of her consciousness, and began to groan, as if pained beyond endurance.
Pan Stanislav and her husband's brother, Pan Hvastovski, who had come just before the funeral, strove to lead her away at the moment Litka was covered with the coffin-lid; but when Pani Emilia began to call the little one by name, courage failed the two men.
The procession moved at last with numerous torches, and drew after it a train of carriages, preceded by priests, chanting gloomily, and surrounded by a crowd of the curious, who in modern cities feed their eyes with the sorrow of others, as in ancient times they fed them in the circus with the blood of people.
Pani Emilia, attended by her husband's brother, and having Marynia at her side, walked also behind the caravan with dry and expressionless face. Her eyes saw only one detail, and her mind was occupied with that alone. It had happened that a lock of Litka's flaxen, immensely abundant hair was outside the coffin. Pani Emilia did not take her eyes from it the whole way, repeating again and again, "O God, O God! they have nailed down the child's hair!"
In Pan Stanislav's sorrow, weariness, nervous disturbance, resulting from sleeplessness, became a feeling of such unendurable oppression that at moments he was seized by an invincible desire to turn back when he had gone halfway,--return home, throw himself on a sofa, not think of anything, not wish anything, not love any one, not feel anything. At the same time this revulsion of self-love astounded him, made him indignant at himself: he knew that he would not return; that he would drain that cup to the bottom, that he would go to the end, not only because it would happen so, but because sorrow for Litka, and attachment to her, would be stronger than his selfishness. He felt, too, at that moment, that all his other feelings were contracted and withered, and that for the whole world he had in his heart merely nothing, at least, at that moment. For that matter his thoughts and feelings had fallen into perfect disorder, composed of external impressions received very hastily, observations made, it was unknown why, and mixed all together mechanically with a feeling of sorrow and pain. At times he looked at the houses past which the procession was moving, and he distinguished their colors. At times some shop sign caught his eye; this he read, not knowing why he did so. Then again he thought that the priests had ceased to sing, but would begin directly; and he was waiting for that renewed continuance of sad voices, as if in a kind of dread. At times he reasoned like a man who, waking from sleep, wishes to give himself an account of reality: "Those are houses," said he to himself; "those are signs; that is the odor of pitch from the torches; and there on the bier lies Litka; and we are going to the graveyard." And all at once there rose in him a wave of sorrow for that sweet, beloved child, for that dear face which had smiled so many times at him. He recalled her from remoter and from recent days; remembered her in Reichenhall, where he carried her when returning from Thumsee; and later at Bigiel's, in the country; and in Pani Emilia's house, when she said that she wanted to be a birch-tree; and finally, when, a few hours before her death, she entreated Marynia to marry him. Pan Stanislav did not say directly to himself that Litka loved him as a grown woman loves, and that, in betrothing him to Marynia, she had performed an act of sacrifice, for the feelings of the little girl were not known, and could not be defined with precision; he felt perfectly, however, that there was something like that love in her, and that the sacrifice took place, flowed, in fact, from that deep and exceptional attachment which Litka had felt for him. Since the loss of even those who are dearest is felt most of all through the personal loss which we suffer, Pan Stanislav began to repeat to himself: "That was the one soul that loved me truly; I have no one in the whole world now." And, raising his eyes to the coffin, to that tress of blond hair which was waving in the wind, he cried out in spirit to Litka with all those tender expressions with which he had spoken to her while in life. Finally, he felt that tears were choking him, because that was a call without echo. There is something heart-rending in the indifference of the dead. When the one who reflected every word and glance has become indifferent, when the loving one is icy, the one who was near in daily life, and next the heart, is full of solemnity, and far away, it avails not to repeat to one's self: "Death, death!" In addition to all pain connected with the loss, there is a harrowing deception, as if an injustice to the heart had been wrought by that lifeless body, which remains deaf to our pain and entreaty. Pan Stanislav had, in this manner, at the bottom of his soul, a feeling that Litka, by taking herself from him, and going to the region of death, had done an injustice; and from being one who is near, she had become one remote; from being a confidant, she had become formal, far away, lofty, sacred, and also perfectly indifferent to the despair of her mother and the deep loneliness of her nearest friend. There was much selfishness in those feelings of Pan Stanislav; but were it not for that selfishness, which, first of all, has its own loss and loneliness in mind, people, especially those who believe in life beyond the grave and its happiness, would feel no grief for the dead.
The procession passed out at last from the city to clearer and more open spaces, and beyond the barrier advanced along the cemetery wall, which was fronted with a garland of beggars, and with garlands of immortelles and evergreens intended for grave mounds. The line of priests in white surplices, the funeral procession with torches, the hearse with the coffin, and the people walking behind it, halted before the gate; there they removed Litka. Pan Stanislav, Bukatski, Hvastovski, and Bigiel bore her to the grave of her father.
That silence, and the void which, after each funeral, is waiting for people at home when they return from fresh graves, seemed this time to begin even at the cemetery. The day was calm, pale, with here and there the last yellowed leaves dropping from the trees without a rustle. The funeral procession was belittled amid these wide, pale spaces, which, studded with crosses, seemed endless,--as if, in truth, that cemetery opened into infinity. The black, leafless trees with tops formed of slender branches, as it were, vanishing in the light, gray and white tombstones resembling apparitions, the withered leaves on the ground, covering long and straight alleys,--all these produced at once a genuine impression of Elysian fields of some sort, fields full of deep rest, but full also of deep, dreamy melancholy, certain "cold and sad places" of which the gloomy head of Cæsar dreamed, and to which now was to come one more "animula vagula."
The coffin stopped at last above the open grave. The piercing "Requiem æternam" was heard, and then "Anima ejus." Pan Stanislav, through the chaos of his thoughts and impressions, and through the veil of his own sorrow, saw, as in a dream, the stony face and glassy eyes of Pani Emilia, the tears of Marynia, which irritated him at that moment, the pale face of Bukatski, on whose features the expression was evident that his philosophy of life, having no work to do at that graveyard, had left him and Litka's coffin at the gate. When each threw a handful of sand on the coffin-lid, he followed the example of others; when they lowered the coffin on straps into the depth of the grave, and closed the stone doors, something seized him anew by the throat, so that all of which he had been thinking, and had learned hitherto, was changed into one nothingness. He repeated in his soul the simple words: "Till we meet, Litus!"--words which, when he recalled them afterwards, seemed to have no relation to the torturing mental storm within him. This was the end. The funeral procession began to decrease and melt away. After a time Pan Stanislav was roused by the wind, which came from afar from between the crosses. He saw now at the grave Pani Emilia with Marynia, Pani Bigiel, Vaskovski, and Litka's uncle; he said to himself that he would go out last, and waited, repeating in his soul, "Till we meet, Litus!" He was thinking of death, and of this,--that he, too, would come to this place of monuments, and that it is an ocean into which all thoughts, feelings, and efforts are flowing. It seemed to him then as if he and all who were there at the grave, or had returned home, were on a ship sailing straight to the precipice. Of life beyond the grave he had no thought at that moment.
Meanwhile the short autumn twilight came on; the crosses grew still less distinct. The old professor and Pan Hvastovski conducted Pani Emilia to the cemetery gate without resistance on her part. Pan Stanislav repeated once more, "Till we meet, dear child!" and passed out.
Beyond the gate he thought: "It is fortunate that the mother is unconscious, for what a terrible thought to leave a child there alone. The dead forsake us, but we too forsake them."
In fact, he saw from a distance the carriage in which Pani Emilia was riding away, and it seemed to him that such an order of things in the world has in it something revolting. Still when he had sat down alone in his droshky, he felt a moment of selfish relief, flowing from the feeling that a certain torturing and oppressive act had been ended, after which would come rest. On returning to his own dwelling, it appeared empty, without a ray of gladness, without consolation or hope; but when at tea, he stretched himself on the sofa, an animal delight in repose after labor took possession of him, with a feeling of solace, and even as it were of satisfaction, that the funeral was over and Litka was buried. He remembered then the opinion of a certain thinker: "I know no criminals; I know only honest people, and they are disgusting." Pan Stanislav seemed to himself repulsive at that moment.
In the evening he remembered that it was needful to inquire about Pani Emilia, whom Marynia was to take for some weeks to her own house. While going out, he saw a photograph of Litka on the table, and kissed it. A quarter of an hour later he rang the bell at the Plavitskis'.
The servant told him that Plavitski had gone out, but that Professor Vaskovski and Father Hylak were there beside Pani Emilia. Marynia received him in the drawing-room; her hair was badly dressed, her eyes red; she was almost ugly. But her former way of meeting him had changed entirely, as if she had forgotten all offences in view of more unhappy subjects.
"Emilia is with me," whispered she, "and is in a bad state; but it seems that at least she understands what is said. Professor Vaskovski is with her. He speaks with such feeling. Do you wish to see Emilia absolutely?"
"No. I have come merely to inquire how she feels, and shall go away directly."
"I do not know--she might like to see you. Wait a moment; I will go and say that you are here. Litka loved you so; for that reason alone perhaps it would be pleasant for Emilia to see you."
"Very well."
Marynia went to the next chamber; but evidently did not begin conversation at once, for to Pan Stanislav there came from the door, not her voice, but that of Vaskovski, full of accents of deep conviction, and also, as it were, of effort, striving to break through the armor of insensibility and suffering.
"It is as if your child had gone to another room after play," said the old professor; "and as if she were to return at once. She will not return, but you will go to her. My dear lady, look at death, not from the side of this world, but from the side of God. The child lives and is happy; for, being herself in eternity, she considers this separation from you as lasting one twinkle of an eye. Litka is living," continued he, with emphasis; "she is living and happy. She sees that you are coming to her, and she stretches forth her hands to you; she knows that in a moment you will come, for from God's point of view life and pain are less than the twinkle of an eye,--and then eternity with Litka. Think, dearest lady, with Litka in peace, in joy,--without disease, without death. Worlds will pass away, and you will be together."
"It would be well were that certain," thought Pan Stanislav, bitterly. But after a while he thought, "If I felt that way, I should have some cause to go in; otherwise not."
Still in spite of this thought he went in, not waiting even for Marynia's return; for it seemed to him that if he had no cause, he had a duty, and he was not free to be cowardly in presence of the suffering of others. Selfishness is "cotton in the ears against human groans," and excuses itself in its own eyes by saying that nothing can be said to great suffering to relieve it. Pan Stanislav understood that this was the case, and was ashamed to withdraw comfortably instead of going to meet the sorrow of a mother. When he entered, he saw Pani Emilia sitting on the sofa; above the sofa was a lamp, and lower than the lamp a palm, which cast a shadow on that unhappy head, as if gigantic fingers were opened above it. Near Pani Emilia sat Vaskovski, who was holding her hands and looking into her face. Pan Stanislav took those hands from him, and, bending down, began to press them to his lips in silence.
Pani Emilia blinked a while, like a person striving to rise out of sleep; then she cried suddenly, with an unexpected outburst,--
"Remember how she--"
And she was borne away by a measureless weeping, during which her hands were clasped, her lips could not catch breath, and her bosom was bursting from sobs. At last strength failed her, and she fainted. When she recovered, Marynia led her to her own chamber. Pan Stanislav and Vaskovski went to the adjoining reception-room, where they were detained by Plavitski, who had come in just that moment.
"Such a sad person in the house," said he,--"it spoils life terribly. A little peace and freedom should be due to me; but what is to be done, what is to be done? I must descend to the second place, and I am ready."
At the end of half an hour Marynia came with the announcement that at her request Pani Emilia had gone to bed, and was a little calmer. Pan Stanislav and Vaskovski took leave, and went out.
They walked along in a dense fog, which rose from the earth after a calm day, hiding the streets and forming parti-colored circles around the lamps. Both were thinking of Litka, who was passing her first night among the dead, and at a distance from her mother. To Pan Stanislav this seemed simply terrible, not for Litka, but for Pani Emilia, who had to think of it. He meditated also over the words spoken by Vaskovski, and said at last,--
"I heard thy words. If they gave her solace, it is well; but if that were true, we should make a feast now, and rejoice that Litka is dead."
"But whence dost thou know that we shall not be happy after death?"
"Wilt thou tell me whence thou hast the knowledge that we shall?"
"I do not know; I believe."
There was no answer to this; therefore Pan Stanislav said, as if to himself, "Mercy, empyrean light, eternity, meeting; but what is there in fact? The corpse of a child in the grave, and a mother who is wailing from pain. Grant that death has produced thy faith at least; yet it brings doubt, because thou art grieving for the child. I am grieving still more; and this grief casts on me directly the question, 'Why did she die? Why such cruelty?' I know that this question is a foolish one, and that milliards of people have put it to themselves; but, if this knowledge is to be my solace, may thunderbolts split it! I know, too, that I shall not find an answer, and for that very reason I want to gnash my teeth and curse. I do not understand, and I rebel; that is all. That is the whole result, which thou canst not recognize as the one sought for."
Vaskovski answered also, as if speaking to himself, "Christ rose from the dead, for He was God; but He rose as man, and He passed through death. How can I, poor worm, do otherwise than magnify the Divine Will and Wisdom in death?"
To this Pan Stanislav answered.--
"It is impossible to talk with thee!"
"It is slippery," answered Vaskovski; "give me thy arm." And, taking Pan Stanislav by the arm, he leaned on him, and said, "My dear friend, thou hast an honest and a loving heart; thou didst love that little girl greatly, thou wert ready to do much for her. Do this one thing now,--whether thou believest or not,--say for her, 'Eternal rest!' If thou think that that will be no good to her, say to thyself, 'I can do no more, but I will do that.'"
"Give me peace!" answered Pan Stanislav.
"That may not be needful to her, but thy remembrance of her will be dear; she will be grateful, and will obtain the grace of God for thee."
Pan Stanislav remembered how Vaskovski, at news of Litka's last attack, said that the life of the child could not be purposeless, and that if she had to die she was predestined to do something before death; and now he wished to attack Vaskovski on this point, when the thought flashed on him that, before her death, Litka had united him with Marynia; and it occurred to him that perhaps she had lived for this very purpose. But at that moment he rebelled against the thought. Anger at Marynia seized him; he was full of stubbornness, and almost contempt.
"I do not want Marynia at such a price!" thought he, gritting his teeth; "I do not! I have suffered enough through her. I would give ten such for one Litka."
Meanwhile Vaskovski, trotting near him, said,--
"Nothing is to be seen at a step's distance, and the stones are slippery from fog. Without thee I should have fallen long ago."
Pan Stanislav recovered himself, and answered,--
"Whoso walks on the earth, professor, must look down, not up."
"Thou hast good legs, my dear friend."
"And eyes which see clearly, even in a fog like this which surrounds us. And it is needful, for we all live in a fog, and deuce knows what is beyond it. All that thou sayest makes on me such an impression as the words of a man who would break dry twigs, throw them into a torrent, and say, Flowers will come from these. Rottenness will come, nothing more. From me, too, this torrent has torn away something from which I am to think that a flower will rise? Folly! But here is thy gate. Good-night!"
And they separated. Pan Stanislav returned to his own house barely alive, he was so weary; and, when he had lain down in bed, he began to torture himself with thoughts further continued, or rather with visions. To begin with, before his eyes appeared the figure of Pani Emilia, powerless from pain; she was sitting in Marynia's parlor, under the palm-leaf, which was hanging over her head like an immense ill-omened hand, with outspread, grasping fingers, and it cast a shadow on her face. "I might philosophize over that till morning," muttered he. "Everything out of which life is constructed is a hand like that, from which a shadow falls,--nothing more. But if there were a little mercy besides, the child would not have died; but with what Vaskovski says, you couldn't keep life in a sparrow."
Here he remembered, however, that Vaskovski not only spoke of death, but begged him also to say "eternal rest" for Litka. Pan Stanislav began now to struggle with himself. His lips were closed through lack of a deep faith that Litka might hear his "eternal rest," and that it might be of good to her. He felt, besides, a kind of shame to speak words which did not flow from the depth of his conviction, and felt also the same kind of shame not to say the "eternal rest." "For, finally, what do I know?" thought he. "Nothing. Around is fog and fog. Likely nothing will come to her from that; but, let happen what may, that is in truth the only thing that I can do now for my kitten,--for that dear child,--who was mindful of me on the night that she died."
And he hesitated for a time yet; at last he knelt and said, "eternal rest." It did not bring him, however, any solace, for it roused only the more sorrow for Litka, and also anger at Vaskovski, because he had pushed him into a position in which he had either to fall into contradiction with himself or be, as it were, a traitor to Litka. He felt, finally, that he had had enough of that kind of torment, and he determined to go early in the morning to his office and occupy himself with Bigiel on the first commercial affair that presented itself, if it were only to tear away his thought from the painful, vicious circle in which for some days he had been turning.
But in the morning Bigiel anticipated him, and came to his house; maybe, too, with the intent to occupy him. Pan Stanislav threw himself with a certain interest into the examination of current business; but he and Bigiel were not long occupied, for an hour later Bukatski came to say farewell to them.
"I am going to Italy to-day," said he, "and God knows when I shall return. I wish to say to you both, Be in good health. The death of that child touched me more than I thought it would."
"Art thou going far?"
"Oh, there would be much talk in the answer. With us, this is how it happens: Be a Buddhist, or whatever may please thee, the kernel of the question is this: one believes a little, trusts a little in some sort of mercy, and thus lives. Meanwhile, what happens? Reality slaps us daily in the face, and brings us into mental agony and anguish, into moral straits. With us, one is always loving somebody, or is tormented with somebody's misfortune; but I do not want this. It tortures me."
"How will the Italians help thee?"
"How will they help me? They will, for in Italy I have the sun, which here I have not; I have art, which here I have not, and I feel for it a weakness; I have chianti,[4] which does good to the catarrh of my stomach; and finally, I have people for whom I care nothing and nothing, and who may die for themselves in hundreds without causing me any bitterness.
"I shall look at pictures, buy what I need, nurse my rheumatism, my headache; and I shall be for myself a more or less elegant, a more or less well nourished, a more or less healthy animal,--which, believe me, is still the kind and condition of life most desired. Here I cannot be that beast which, from my soul, I wish to be."
"Thou art right, Bukatski. We, as thou seest, are sitting with our accounts, also somewhat for this,--to become more idiotic, and not think of aught else. When we acquire such a fortune as thou hast, I don't know how it is with Bigiel, but I will follow in thy steps."
"Then till we see each other again in time and space!" said Bukatski.
A while after his departure, Pan Stanislav said,--
"He is right. How happy I should be, for example, if I had not become attached to that child and Pani Emilia! In this respect we are incurable, and we spoil our lives voluntarily. He is right. In this country one is always loving some person or something; it is an inherited disease. Eternal romanticism, eternal sentimentalism,--and eternally pins in the heart."
"Old Plavitski bows to thee," said Bigiel. "That man loves nobody but himself."
"In reality, this is perhaps true; but he lacks the courage to tell himself that that is permissible and necessary. Nay, what is more, he is convinced that it is needful to act otherwise; and through this he is in continual slavery. Here, though a man have a nature like Plavitski's, he must feign even to himself that he loves some one or something."
"But will you visit Pani Emilia to-day?" asked Bigiel.
"Of course! If I were to say, for example, 'I have the malaria,' I should not cure myself by saying so."
And, in fact, not only was he at Pani Emilia's that day, but he was there twice; for at his first visit he did not find the ladies at home. To the question where his daughter was, Plavitski answered, with due pathos and resignation, "I have no daughter now." Pan Stanislav, not wishing to tell him fables, for which he felt a sudden desire, went away, and returned only in the evening.
This time Marynia herself received him, and informed him that Pani Emilia had slept for the first time since Litka's funeral. While saying this, she left her hand a certain time in his. Pan Stanislav, in spite of all the disorder in which his thoughts were, could not avoid noticing this; and, when he looked at last with an inquiring glance into her eyes, he discovered that the young lady's cheeks flushed deeply. They sat down, and began to converse.
"We were at Povanzki," said Marynia, "and I promised Emilia to go there with her every day."
"But is it well for her to remember the child so every day, and open her wounds?"
"But are they healed?" answered Marynia, "or is it possible to say to her, 'Do not go'? I thought myself that it would not be well, but grew convinced of the contrary. At the graveyard she wept much, but was the better for it. On the way home she remembered what Professor Vaskovski had told her, and the thought is for her the only consolation,--the only."
"Let her have even such a one," answered Pan Stanislav.
"You see, I did not dare to mention Litka at first, but she speaks of her all the time. Do not fear to speak to her of the child, for it gives her evident solace."
Here the young lady continued in a lower, and, as it were, an uncertain voice, "She reproaches herself continually for having listened to the assurances of the doctor the last night, and gone to sleep; she is sorry for those last moments, which she might have passed with Litka, and that thought tortures her. To-day, when we were returning from the graveyard, she asked about the smallest details. She asked how the child looked, how long she slept, whether she took medicine, what she said, whether she spoke to us; then she implored me to remember everything, and not omit a single word."
"And you did not omit anything?"
"No."
"How did she receive it?"
"She cried very, very much."
Both grew silent, and were silent rather long; then Marynia said,--
"I will go and see what is happening to her."
After a while she returned.
"She is sleeping," said the young lady. "Praise be to God!"
Indeed, Pan Stanislav did not see Pani Emilia that evening; she had fallen into a kind of lethargic slumber. At parting, Marynia pressed his hand again long and vigorously, and inquired almost with submission,--
"You do not take it ill of me that I repeated to Pani Emilia Litka's last wish?"
"At such moments," answered Pan Stanislav, "I cannot think of myself: for me it is a question only of Pani Emilia; and if your words caused her solace, I thank you for them."
"Till to-morrow, then?"
"Till to-morrow."
Pan Stanislav took farewell, and went out. While descending the steps, he thought,--
"She considers herself my betrothed."
And he was not mistaken; Marynia looked on him as her betrothed. She had never been indifferent to him; on the contrary, the greatness of his offence had been for her the measure of that uncommon interest which he had roused in her. And though, during Litka's illness and funeral, he could discover in himself unfathomable stores of selfishness, he seemed to her so good that she was simply unable to compare him with any one. Litka's words did the rest. In real truth, her heart desired love first of all; and now, since before Litka's death she had made her a promise, since she had bound herself to love and to marry, it seemed to her that even if she had not loved, it was her duty to command herself, and that she was not free at present not to love. Pan Stanislav had entered the sphere of her duty; she belonged to those straightforward, womanly natures, not at all rare even now, for whom life and duty mean one and the same thing, and who for this reason bring good-will to the fulfilment of duty, and not only good, but persistent will.
Such a will brings with it love, which lights like the sun, warms like its heat, and cherishes like the blue, mild sky. In this way life does not become a dry, thorny path, which pricks, but a flowery one, which blooms and delights. This country maiden, straightforward in thought, and at once simple and delicate in feelings, possessed that capacity for life and happiness in the highest degree. So, when Pan Stanislav had gone, she, in thinking about him, did not name him in her mind otherwise than "Pan Stas," for he had indeed become her "Pan Stas."
Pan Stanislav, on his part, when lying down to sleep, repeated to himself somewhat mechanically, "She considers herself my betrothed."
Litka's death, and the events of the last days, had pushed Marynia, not only in his thoughts, but in his heart, to more remote, and even very remote places. Now he began to think of her again, and at the same time of his future. All at once he beheld, as it were, a cloud of countless questions, to which, at that moment, at least, he had no answer. But he felt fear in presence of them; he felt that he lacked strength and willingness to undertake this labor. Again he began to live with the former life; again to fall into that sentimental, vicious circle; again to disquiet himself; again to make efforts, and struggle over things which bring only bitterness,--to struggle with himself over questions of feeling. Would it not be better to labor with Bigiel on accounts,--make money,--so as to go sometime, like Bukatski, to Italy, or some other place where there is sun, art, wine good for the stomach, and, above all, people to whom one is indifferent, whose happiness will not enliven the heart of a stranger, but in return whose death or misfortune will not press a single tear from him.
FOOTNOTES:
[4] An Italian wine.
Chapter XX
During all the mental struggles through which Pan Stanislav had passed, the interests of his commercial house were developed favorably. Thanks to Bigiel's sound judgment, diligence, and care, current business was transacted with a uniform thoroughness which removed every chance of dissatisfaction or complaint from the patrons of the house. The house gained reputation every day, extended its activity slowly and regularly, and was growing rich. Pan Stanislav, on his part, labored, not indeed with such mental peace as hitherto, but no less than Bigiel. He passed the morning hours daily in the office; and the greater his mental vexation, the deeper his misunderstanding with Marynia since her coming to Warsaw, the more earnest was his labor. This labor, often difficult, and at times requiring even much intense thought, but unconnected with the question which pained him, and incapable of giving any internal solace, became, at last, a kind of haven, in which he hid from the storm. Pan Stanislav began to love it. "Here, at least, I know what I am doing, and whither I am tending; here everything is very clear. If I do not find happiness, I shall find at least that enlargement of life, that freedom, which money gives; and all the better for me if I succeed in stopping at that." Recent events had merely confirmed him in those thoughts; in fact, nothing but suffering had come to him from his feelings. That sowing had yielded a bitter harvest, while the only successes which he had known, and which in every case strengthen and defend one against misfortune, were given by that mercantile house. Pan Stanislav thought with a certain surprise that this was true; but it was not. He himself felt the narrowness of that satisfaction which the house could give; but he said to himself at the same time, "Since it cannot be otherwise, this must be accepted; and it is safer to stop here, for it is better to be only a merchant, who succeeds, than a dreamer, who fails in everything." Since Litka's death, then, he resolved all the more to stifle in himself those impulses to which reality did not answer, and which had brought him nothing but regrets. Evidently Bigiel was pleased with a state of mind in his partner which could bring only profit to the house.
Still Pan Stanislav could not grow wholly indifferent in a few weeks to all that with which, on a time, his heart had been connected. Hence he went sometimes to visit Litka, whose gravestone was covered in the morning with white winter frost. Twice he met Pani Emilia and Marynia in the cemetery. Once he attended them home to the city, and Pani Emilia thanked him for remembering the little girl. Pan Stanislav noticed that she did this with evident calmness; he understood the cause of this calmness when, at parting, she said to him,--
"I keep always in mind now that for her separation from me is as short as one twinkle of an eye; and you know not what comfort it is to me that at least she is not yearning."
"Well, what I know not, I know not," said Pan Stanislav, in his soul. Still the deep conviction of Pani Emilia's speech struck him. "If these are illusions," thought he, "they are really life-giving, since they are able to draw forth juices for life from the dungeon of the grave."
Marynia asserted, besides, in her first conversation with Pan Stanislav, that Pani Emilia lived only through that thought, which alone softened her grief. For whole days she mentioned nothing else, and said, with such persistence, that from God's point of view death is separation for one twinkle of an eye, that she began to alarm Marynia.
"She talks, too, of Litka," said Marynia, in conclusion, "as if the child had not died, and as if she should see her to-morrow."
"That is happy," answered Pan Stanislav. "Vaskovski rendered tangible service; such a nail in the head gives no pain."
"Still, she is right, for it is so."
"I will not contradict you."
Marynia was alarmed, it is true, by the persistence with which Pani Emilia returned to one thought; but on the other hand she herself did not look on death otherwise. Hence that tinge of scepticism, evident in Pan Stanislav's words, touched her a little, and pained her; but, not wishing to let this be evident, she changed the conversation.
"I gave directions to enlarge Litka's photograph," said she. "Yesterday they brought me three copies; one I will give Emilia. I feared at first that it would excite her too much, but now I see that I may give it; nay, more, it will be very dear to her."
She rose then, and went to a bookcase on which were some photographs in a wrapper; these she took, and, sitting at Pan Stanislav's side before a small table, opened them.
"Emilia told me of a certain talk which you had with Litka a short time before her death, when the child wished you three to be birches growing near one another. Do you remember that talk?"
"I do. Litka wondered that trees live so long; she thought awhile what kind of tree she would like to be, and the birch pleased her most."
"True; and you said that you would like to grow near by, therefore, around these photographs I wish to paint birches on a passe-partout. Here I have begun, you see, but I have no great success. I cannot paint from memory."
Then she took one of the photographs, and showed Pan Stanislav the birches painted in water-colors; but since she was a little near-sighted, she bent over her work, so that her temple for one moment was near Pan Stanislav's face. She was no longer that Marynia of whom he had dreamed when returning evenings from Pani Emilia's, and who at that time had filled his whole soul for him. That period had passed: his thoughts had gone in another direction; but Marynia had not ceased to be that type of woman which produced on his masculine nerves an impression exceptionally vivid; and now, when her temple almost touched his own, when, with one glance of the eye, he took in her face, her cheeks slightly colored, and her form bent over the picture, he felt the old attraction with its former intensity, and the quick blood sent equally quick thoughts to his brain. "Were I to kiss her eyes and mouth now," thought he, "I am curious to know what she would do;" and in a twinkle the desire seized him to do so, even were he to offend Marynia mortally. In return for long rejection, for so much fear and suffering, he would like such a moment of recompense, and of revenge, perhaps, with it. Meanwhile, Marynia, while examining the painting, continued,--
"This seems worse to-day than yesterday; unfortunately trees have no leaves now, and I cannot find a model."
"The group is not bad at all," said Pan Stanislav; "but if these trees are to represent Pani Emilia, Litka, and me, why have you painted four birches?"
"The fourth represents me," said Marynia, with a certain timidity; "I, too, have a wish sometimes to grow with you."
Pan Stanislav looked at her quickly; and she, wrapping the photographs up again, said, as it were, hurriedly,--
"So many things are connected in my mind with the memory of that child. During her last days I was with her and Emilia almost continually. At present Emilia is one of the nearest persons on earth to me. I belong to them as well as you do; I know not clearly how to explain this. There were four of us, and now there are three, bound together by Litka, for she bound us. When I think of her now, I think also of Emilia and of you. This is why I decided to paint the four birches; and you see there are three photographs,--one for Emilia, one for me, and one for you."
"I thank you," said Pan Stanislav, extending his hand to her. Marynia returned the pressure very cordially, and said,--
"For the sake of her memory, too, we should forget all our former resentments."
"This has happened already," answered Pan Stanislav; "and as for me, I wish that it had happened long before Litka's death."
"My fault began then; for this I beg forgiveness," and she extended her hand to him.
Pan Stanislav hesitated awhile whether to raise it to his lips; but he did not raise it, he only said,--
"Now there is agreement."
"And friendship?" asked Marynia.
"And friendship."
In her eyes a deep, quiet joy was reflected, which enlivened her whole face with a mild radiance. There was in her at the moment so much kindness and trustfulness that she reminded Pan Stanislav of that first Marynia whom he had seen at Kremen when she was sitting on the garden veranda in the rays of the setting sun. But since Litka's death he had been in such a frame of mind that he considered remembrances like that as unworthy of him; hence he rose and began to take leave.
"Will you not remain the whole evening?" asked Marynia.
"No, I must return."
"I will tell Emilia that you are going," said she, approaching the door of the adjoining room.
"She is either thinking of Litka at present, or is praying; otherwise she would have come of herself. Better not interrupt her; I will come to-morrow in any case."
Marynia approached him, and, looking into his eyes, said with great cordiality, "To-morrow and every day. Is it not true? Remember that you are 'Pan Stas' for us now."
Since Litka's death Marynia had named him thus for the second time, so in going home he thought, "Her relations to me are changed thoroughly. She feels herself simply as belonging to me, for she bound herself to that by the promise given the dying child; she is ready even to fall in love with me, and will not permit herself not to love. With us there are such women by the dozen." And all at once he fell into anger.
"I know those fish natures with cold hearts, but sentimental heads filled with so-called principles,--everything for principle, everything for duty, nothing spontaneous in the heart. I might sigh out my last breath at her feet and gain nothing; but when duty commands her to love me, she will love even really."
Evidently Pan Stanislav in his wanderings abroad had grown used to another kind of women, or at least he had read of them in books. But since with all this he had a little sound judgment too, that judgment began to speak thus to him,--
"Listen, Polanyetski," it said. "These are exceptional natures because they are uncommonly reliable: on them one may build; on them a life may be founded. Art thou mad? With thee it was a question of finding a wife, not an ephemeral love affair."
But Pan Stanislav did not cease to resist, and he answered his judgment, "If I am to be loved, I want to be loved for my own sake."
Judgment tried once more to explain that it was all one how love began; since later on he could be loved only for his own sake, that in the present case, after his recent efforts and vexations, it was almost miraculous, almost providential, that something natural had intervened in a way to break resistance immediately; but Pan Stanislav did not cease from being furious. At last judgment was strengthened by that attraction and pleasure which he found in Marynia, by virtue of which he saw in her more charms than in any other woman; this attraction spoke in its turn,--
"I do not know if thou love her, and I care not; but to-day, when her arm and face approached thee, thou wert near jumping out of thy skin. Why is it that such a shiver does not pass through thee when thou art near another? Think what a difference in that."
But to everything Pan Stanislav answered: "A fish, a duty-bound fish." And again the thought came to him, "Catch her, if thou prefer that to any other kind. People marry; and for thee, it is time. What more dost thou want, is it a kind of love which thou wouldst be the first to laugh into ridicule? Thy love has died out. Suppose it has; but the attraction remains, and the conviction, too, that this woman is reliable and honest."
"True," thought he further, "but from love, whether stupid or wise, comes choice, and have I that at present? No, for I hesitate, while formerly I did not hesitate; second, I ought to decide which is better,--Panna Plavitski, or debit and credit in the house of Bigiel and Polanyetski. Money gives power and freedom; the best use is made of freedom when a man carries no one in his heart or on his shoulders." Thus meditating, he reached home, and lay down to sleep. During the night he dreamed of birches on sand hills, calm blue eyes, and a forehead shaded with dark hair, from which warmth was beating.
Chapter XXI
Some mornings later, before Pan Stanislav had gone to his office, Mashko appeared.
"I come to thee on two affairs," said he, "but I will begin with money, so as to leave thee freedom of action; shall I, or not?"
"My dear friend, I attend to money questions in my office, so begin with the other."
"The money matter is not a question of thy house, but a private one; for this reason I prefer to speak of it privately. I am going to marry, as thou knowest; I need money. I have to make payments as numerous as the hairs on my head, and the wherewithal does not correspond. The term is near to pay the first instalment of my debt to thee for the claim on Kremen; canst thou extend the time another quarter?"
"I will be frank," replied Pan Stanislav; "I can, but I am unwilling to do so."
"Well, I will be equally sincere, and ask what thou wilt do in case I fail to pay."
"The like happens in the world," answered Pan Stanislav; "but this time thou art looking on me as simpler than I am, for I know that thou wilt pay."
"Whence is that certainty?"
"Thou art going to marry, and marry a fortune; how expose thyself to the evil fame of bankruptcy? Thou wilt squeeze money from under the earth, perhaps, but thou wilt pay."
"Even Solomon could not pour out of the empty."
"Because he did not take lessons from thee. My dear friend, no one is listening to us, so I may say that all thy life thou hast been doing nothing else."
"Then thou art sure that I will pay thee?"
"I am."
"Thou art right; I wanted of thee a favor to which I have no claim. But even I feel wearied at last of all this,--to take something here and thrust it in there; to live eternally in such a whirl passes human power in the long run. I am sailing, as it were, into the harbor. In two months I shall be on a new footing, but meanwhile I am using the last of my steam; 'tis not in thy way to oblige me; the position is difficult. There is a small forest in Kremen; I will cut that and pay, since there is no other way."
"What forests are there in Kremen? Old Plavitski shaved off everything that could be taken."
"There is a large oak grove behind the house, toward Nedzyalkov."
"True, there is."
"I know that thou and Bigiel take up such affairs. Buy that forest; it will spare me the search for a purchaser, and he and thou can come out of the business with profit."
"I will discuss it with Bigiel."
"Then thou wilt not refuse in advance?"
"No; if thou give it cheaply, I may even take the forest myself. But in such matters I need to calculate the possible profits or losses; I want also to know thy terms. Make thy own estimates. Send me thy list; how many trees there are, and what kinds."
"I will send it in an hour."
"In that case I will give thee an answer in the evening."
"I advise thee beforehand of one thing,--thou wilt not have the right to cut oak for two months."
"Why is that?"
"Because Kremen will lose greatly by losing that ornament; hence I propose that it be resold to me after the marriage, of course at a good profit to thee."
"We shall see."
"Besides, I have marl in Kremen; thou hast spoken to me of this. Plavitski reckoned it at millions,--that, of course, is nonsense; but in the hands of clever men it might be made a paying business. Think that over, too, with Bigiel; I would take thee into partnership."
"Should the business seem good, we may take it; our house exists to gain profit."
"Then we will talk of the marl later on; but now I return to the oak. Let the general outline of our bargain be this,--that I, instead of the first payment, give thee the oak grove, or a part of it, according to estimate. I give it in some sense in pledge, and thou art obliged not to cut trees before the close of the following quarter."
"I can do that; evidently there will be questions later on as to removal of the oak, which we shall mention when writing the contract, if, in general, we write one."
"Then there is at least one burden off my head," said Mashko, rubbing his forehead with his hand. "Imagine that I have ten or fifteen such every day, not counting conversations on business with Pani Kraslavski, which are more wearying than all else, and then waiting on my betrothed, who"--here Mashko interrupted himself for a moment, but suddenly waved his hand, and added--"which also is not easy."
Pan Stanislav looked at him with amazement. On the lips of Mashko, who, in every word, followed society observances so closely, this was something unheard of. Mashko, however, spoke on,--
"But let that pass; thou knowest how near we were to quarrelling before Litka's death. I had not in mind thy great love for that little maiden; I forgot that thou wert disturbed and annoyed. I acted rudely; the fault was on my side entirely, and I beg thy pardon."
"That is a forgotten affair," said Pan Stanislav.
"I revive it because I have a service to beg of thee. The affair is of this kind: I have not friends, blood relatives; I haven't them, or if I have, it is not worth while to exhibit them. Now, I must find groomsmen, and, in truth, I do not know well where to look for them. I have managed the business of various young lords, as thou knowest; but to ask the first young fellow whom I meet, because he has a title, does not beseem me, and I am unwilling to do so. With me it is a question of having groomsmen who are people of position, and, I tell thee openly, with prominent names. Those ladies, too, attach great importance to this matter. Wilt thou be a groomsman for me?"
"In other circumstances I would not refuse; but I will tell thee how it is. Look at me: I have no crape on my hat nor white tape on my coat, therefore I am not in mourning; but I give thee my word that I am in deeper mourning than if my own child were dead."
"That is true; I had not thought of that," said Mashko. "I beg thy pardon."
These words impressed Pan Stanislav.
"But if this is very important; if, in truth, thou art unable to find another,--let it be according to thy wish; but I say sincerely that for me, after such a funeral, it will be difficult to assist at a wedding."
Pan Stanislav did not say, it is true, at such a wedding, but Mashko divined his thought. "There is another circumstance, too," continued he. "Thou must have heard of a certain poor little doctor, who fell in love to the death with thy betrothed. She was free not to return his love, no man will reproach her for that; but he, poor fellow, went his way somewhere to the land where pepper grows, and the deuce took him. Dost understand? I was in friendship with that doctor; he confided his misfortune to me, and wept out his secret. Dost understand? In these conditions to be groomsman for another--say thyself."
"And did that man really die of love for my betrothed?"
"But hast thou not heard of it?"
"Not only have I not heard, but I cannot believe my own ears."
"Knowest thou what, Mashko, marriage changes a man; but I see that betrothal does also,--I do not recognize thee simply."
"Because, as I have said, I am so weary that breath fails me, and at such times the mask falls."
"What dost thou mean by that?"
"I mean that there are two kinds of people,--one, of people who never limit themselves by anything, and arrange their modes of action according to every circumstance; the other, of people having a certain system which they hold to with more or less sequence. I belong to the second. I am accustomed to observe appearances, and, what is more, accustomed so long that at last it has become a second nature to me. But, for example, when travelling in time of great heat, a moment may come on the man who is most comme il faut, when he will unbutton not only his coat, but his shirt; such a moment has come on me, therefore I unbutton."
"This means?--"
"It means that I am transfixed with astonishment that any man could fall in love to the death with my betrothed, who is, as thou on a time didst give me to understand, cold, formal, and as mechanical in words, thoughts, and movements as if wound up with a key; that is perfectly true, and I confirm it. I do not wish thee to hold me for a greater wretch than I am; I do not love her, and my wife will be as formal as my betrothed. I loved Panna Plavitski, who rejected me. Panna Kraslavski I take for her property. Call this iniquity, if it suit thee to do so; I will answer that such iniquity has been committed, or will be committed, by thousands among those so-called honorable people, to whom thou art ready to give thy hand. Moreover, life does not flow on in delight for people thus married, but also not in tragedy; they limp, but go forward. Later on they are aided by years spent together, which bring a species of attachment, by children who are born to them; and they get on in some fashion. Such are most marriages, for the majority choose to walk on the earth, rather than scale summits. Sometimes there are even worse marriages: when a woman wishes to fly, and a man to creep, or vice versa, there is no chance for an understanding. As to me, I have worked like an ox. Coming from a reduced family, I wished to gain distinction, I confess. If I had consented to remain an obscure attorney, and acquire merely money, perhaps I should have unlocked and thrown open to my son the door to light; but I have no love for my children before they come into the world, hence I wished not only to have money myself, but to be somebody, to mean something, to occupy a position, to have such weight as with us it is possible to have, at least in society. From this it has happened that what the advocate gained, the great lord expended; position obliges. This is why I have not money. Struggling of this sort has wearied me. Opening holes in one place to fill them in another,--for this reason I marry Panna Kraslavski; who again marries me for the reason that, if I am not really a great lord, amusing himself in the legal career, I am so apparently. The match is even; there is no injustice to any one, and neither has tricked the other, or, if it please thee, we have tricked each other equally. Here is the whole truth for thee; now despise me if thou wish."
"As God lives, I have never respected thee more," answered Pan Stanislav; "for now I admire not thy sincerity merely, but also thy courage."
"I accept the compliment because thou art candid; but in what dost thou see courage?"
"In this,--that having so few illusions as to Panna Kraslavski, thou art going to marry her."
"I marry her because I am more wise than foolish. I looked for money, it is true; but thinkest thou that for money I would marry the first woman I met who possessed it? By no means, my dear friend. I take Panna Kraslavski, and I know what I am doing. She has her great qualities, indispensable under the circumstances in which I take her, and in which she marries me. She will be a cold, unagreeable wife, sour, and even contemptuous, in so far as she does not fear me; but, on the other hand, Panna Kraslavski, as well as her mother, has a religious respect for appearances,--for what is fitting, or, speaking generally, for what is polite. This is one point. Further, there is not even one germ in her from which love intrigues could grow; and life with her, be it disagreeable as it may, will never end in scandal. This is the second. Third, she is pedantic in everything, as well in religion as in fulfilment of all the duties which she may take on herself. This is, indeed, a great quality. I shall not be happy with her, but I can be at peace; and who knows if this is not the maximum possible to ask of life, and I tell thee, my dear friend, that when a man takes a wife he should think before all of future peace. In a mistress seek what pleases thee,--wit, temperament, a poetical form of sensitiveness. But with a wife one must live years; seek in her that on which one can rely,--seek principles."
"I have never thought thee a fool," said Pan Stanislav; "but I see that thou hast more wit than I suspected."
"Our women--take those, for example, of the money world--are formed really on the French novel; and what comes of that is known to thee."
"More or less; but to-day thou art so eloquent that I listen to thy description with pleasure."
"Well, a woman becomes her own God and her own measure of right."
"And for her husband?"
"A chameleon and a tragedy."
"This happens a little in the world of much money and no traditions; there everything is appearance and toilet, beneath which sits not a soul, but a more or less exquisite wild beast. And this wealthy and elegant world, amusing itself, and permeated with artistic, literary, and even religious dilettantism, wields the baton and directs the orchestra."
"Not yet with us."
"Not yet altogether. For that matter, there are exceptions, even in the society mentioned; all the more must there be outside it. Yes, there are women of another kind among us,--for instance, Panna Plavitski. Oh, what security, and withal what a charm of life, with a woman like her! Unhappily, she is not for me."
"Mashko, I was ready to recognize in thee cleverness, but I did not know thee to have enthusiasm."
"What's to be done? I was in love with her, but now I am going to marry Panna Kraslavski."
Mashko pronounced the last words, as if in anger, then followed a moment of silence.
"Then thou wilt not be my groomsman?"
"Give me time to consider."
"In three days I am going away."
"To what place?"
"To St. Petersburg. I have business there; I will stay about two weeks."
"I will give my answer on thy return."
"Very well; to-day I will send thee the estimate of my oak in three sizes. To save the instalment!"
"And the conditions on which I will buy it."
Here Mashko took leave and went out. Pan Stanislav hastened to his office. After a conversation with Bigiel, he decided, if the affair should seem practicable and profitable, to buy the oak alone. He could not account to himself why he felt a certain wonderful desire to be connected with Kremen. After business hours he thought also of what Mashko had said of Panna Plavitski. He felt that the man had told the truth, and that, with a woman of this kind, life might be not only safe and peaceful, but full of charm; he noticed, however, that in those meditations he rendered justice rather to the type of which Marynia was a specimen, than to Marynia in person. He observed also in himself a thousand inconsistencies; he saw that he felt a certain repugnance, and even anger, at the thought of loving any one or anything, or letting his heart go into bonds and knots, usually fastened so firmly that they were painful. At the very thought of this he was enraged, and repeated in spirit, "I will not; I have had enough of this! It is an unwholesome exuberance, which leads people only to errors and suffering." At the same time he took it ill,--for example, that she did not love him with a certain exuberant and absolute love, and opened her heart to him only when duty commanded. Afterward, when he did not want love, he was astonished that it began to pall on him so easily, and that he desired Marynia far more when she was opposed, than now, when she was altogether inclined to him.
"All leads to this at last," thought he: "that man himself does not know what he wants, or what he must hold to; that is his position. May a thunderbolt split it! Panna Plavitski has more good qualities than she herself suspects. She is dutiful, just, calm, attractive; my thoughts draw me toward her; and still I feel that Panna Plavitski is not for me what she once was, and that the devils have taken something that was in me. But what is it? As to the capacity for loving," continued Pan Stanislav, in his monologue, "I have come to the conclusion that loving is most frequently folly, and loving too much folly at all times; hence I should now be content, but I am not."
After a while it came to his mind that this was merely a species of weakness,--such, for example, as follows an operation in surgery, or an illness that a man has passed through,--and that positive life will fill out in time that void which he feels. For him positive life was his mercantile house. When he went to dine, he found Vaskovski and two servants, who winked at each other when they saw how the old man at times held motionless an uplifted fork with a morsel of meat on it, and fell to thinking of death, or talking to himself. Professor Vaskovski had for some time been holding these monologues, and spoke to himself on the street so distinctly that people looked around at him. His blue eyes were turned on Pan Stanislav for a while vacantly; then he roused himself, as if from sleep, and finished the thought which had risen in his head. "She says that this will bring her near the child."
"Who says?" inquired Pan Stanislav.
"Pani Emilia."
"How will she be nearer?"
"She wants to become a Sister of Charity."
Pan Stanislav grew silent under the impression of that news. He was able to meditate over that which passed through his head, to expel feeling, to philosophize on the unwholesome excesses of the society in which he lived; but in his soul he had two sacred images,--Litka and Pani Emilia. Litka had become simply a cherished memory, but he loved Pani Emilia with a living, brotherly, and most tender affection, which he never touched in his meditations. So for a time he could not find speech; then he looked sternly at Vaskovski, and said,--
"Professor, thou art persuading her to this. I do not enter into thy mysticism and ideas from beneath a dark star, but know this,--that thou wilt take her life on thy conscience; for she has not the strength to be a Sister of Charity, and will die in a year."
"My dear friend," answered Vaskovski, "thou hast condemned me unjustly without a hearing. Hast thou stopped to consider what the expression 'just man' means?"
"When it is a question of one dear to me, I jeer at expressions."
"She told me yesterday of this, most unexpectedly, and I asked, 'But, my child, will you have the strength? That is arduous labor.' She smiled at me, and said: 'Do not refuse me, for this is my refuge, my happiness. Should it seem that I have not strength enough, they will not receive me; but if they receive me, and my strength fails afterward, I shall go sooner to Litka, and I am yearning so much for her.' What had I to answer to such a choice, and such simplicity? What art thou able to say, even thou, who art without belief? Wouldst thou have courage to say: 'Perhaps Litka is not in existence; a life in labor, in charity, in sacrifice, and death in Christ, may not lead to Litka at all'? Invent another consolation; but what wilt thou invent? Give her another hope, heal her with something else; but with what wilt thou heal her? Besides, thou wilt see her thyself; speak to her sincerely. Wilt thou have courage to dissuade her?"
"No," answered Pan Stanislav, briefly; and after a while he added, "Only suffering on all sides."
"One thing might be possible," continued Vaskovski. "To choose instead of Sisters of Charity, whose work is beyond her strength, some contemplative order; there are those in whom the poor human atom is so dissolved in God that it ceases to lead an individual existence, and ceases to suffer."
Pan Stanislav waved his hand. "I do not understand these things," said he, dryly, "and I do not look into them."
"I have here somewhere a little Italian book on the Ladies of Nazareth," said Vaskovski, opening his coat. "Where did I put it? When going out, I stuck it somewhere."
"What can the Ladies of Nazareth be to me?"
But Vaskovski, after unbuttoning his coat, unbuttoned his shirt in searching; then he thought a while and said, "What am I looking for? I know that little Italian book. In a couple of days I am going to Rome for a long, very long time. Remember what I said, that Rome is the antechamber to another world. It is time for me to go to God's antechamber. I would persuade Emilia greatly to go to Rome, but she will not leave her child; she will remain here as a Sister of Charity. Maybe, however, the order of Nazareth would please her; it is as simple and mild as was primitive Christianity. Not with the head, my dear, for there they know better what to do, but with the heart, childlike but loving."
"Button thy shirt, professor," said Pan Stanislav.
"Very good; I will button it. I have something at my heart, and I would tell it thee; thou art as mobile as water, but thou hast a soul. Seest thou, Christianity not only is not coming to an end, as some philosophizing, giddy heads imagine, but it has only made half its way."
"Dear professor," said Pan Stanislav, mildly, "I will listen to what thou hast to tell me willingly and patiently, but not to-day; for to-day I am thinking only of Pani Emilia, and there is simply a squeezing at my throat. This is a catastrophe."
"Not for her, since her life will be a success, and her death also."
Pan Stanislav began to mutter, "As God lives, not only every mightier feeling, but simple friendship, ends in regret; never has any attachment brought me a thing except suffering. Bukatski is right: from general attachments there is nothing but suffering, from personal attachments nothing but suffering; and now live, man, in the world so surrounded."
The conversation broke off, or rather was turned into the monologue of Professor Vaskovski, who began a discourse with himself about Rome and Christianity. After dinner they went out on the street, which was full of the sound of sleighbells and the gladsome winter movement. Though in the morning of that day snow had fallen in sufficient abundance, toward evening the weather had become fair, calm, and frosty.
"But, professor, button thy shirt."
"Very well; I will button it," answered Vaskovski; and he began to draw the holes of his vest to the buttons of his frockcoat.
"Still I like that Vaskovski," said Pan Stanislav, to himself, when on the way home. "If I were to grow attached to him for good, the deuce would take him surely, for such is my fate. Fortunately I am insensible enough to him so far." And thus he persuaded himself untruly, for he had a sincere friendship for Vaskovski, and the man's fate was not indifferent in the least to him. When he reached home, Litka's face smiled at him from a large photograph as he entered; this had been sent by Marynia during his absence, and moved Pan Stanislav to the depth of his soul. He experienced, moreover, this species of emotion whenever he remembered Litka on a sudden, or saw unexpectedly one of her portraits. He thought then, that love for the child, hidden away somewhere in the depth of his heart, rose suddenly with its previous vividness and power, penetrating his whole being with indescribable tenderness and sorrow. This revival of sorrow was even so painful that he avoided it as a man avoids a real suffering usually. This time, however, there was something sweet in his emotion. Litka was smiling at him by the light of the lamp, as if she wished to say "Pan Stas;" around her head on the white margin of the picture were four green birches. Pan Stanislav stopped and looked for a long time; at last he thought, "I know in what may be the happiness of life, in children!" But he said to himself a few moments later, "I never shall love my own as I loved that poor child." The servant entered now and gave him a letter from Marynia, which came with the photograph. She wrote as follows:--
"My father asks me to pray you to spend the evening with us. Emilia has moved to her own house, and receives no visits to-day. I send you Litka's photograph, and beg you to come without fail. I wish to speak with you of Emilia. Papa has invited Pan Bigiel, who has promised to come; therefore you and I can talk quietly."
Pan Stanislav, after reading the letter, dressed, read a certain time, then went to the Plavitskis'. Bigiel had been there a quarter of an hour, and was playing piquet with Plavitski; Marynia was sitting at some distance, by a small table, occupied in work of some kind. After he had greeted all, Pan Stanislav sat near her,--
"I thank you most earnestly for the photograph," began he. "I saw it unexpectedly, and Litka stood before my eyes in such form that I could not control myself. Moments like that are the measure of sorrow, of which a man cannot even give account to himself. I thank you most earnestly, and for the four birches too. Touching Pani Emilia, I know everything from Vaskovski. Is this merely a project, or a fixed resolve?"
"Rather a fixed resolve," answered Marynia; "and what do you think?"
Marynia raised her eyes to him as if waiting for some counsel.
"She has not strength for it," said she, finally.
Pan Stanislav was silent a while; then he opened his arms helplessly, and said,--
"I have talked about this with Vaskovski. I attacked him, since I thought that the idea was his; but he swore to me that he had nothing to do with it. He asked then what other consolation I could think out for her, and I could give him no answer. What in life has remained to her really?"
"What?" returned Marynia, in a low voice.
"Do I not understand, think you, whence that resolve came? She does not wish to violate her religious principles in any way, but she wants to die as soon as possible; she knows that those duties are beyond her strength, and therefore she assumes them."
"True," answered Marynia; and she inclined her face so closely to her work that Pan Stanislav saw only the parting of the dark hair on her small head. Before her stood a box full of pearls, which she was sewing on to various articles to be used in a lottery for benevolent purposes; and tears, which were flowing from her eyes, began to drop on those pearls.
"I see that you are weeping," said Pan Stanislav.
She raised tearful eyes to him, as if to say, "Before thee I shall not hide tears," and answered, "I know that Emilia is doing well, but such a pity--"
Pan Stanislav, partly from emotion, and partly because he knew not himself what to answer, kissed her hand for the first time.
Pearls began then to drop more thickly from Marynia's eyes, so that she had to rise and go out. Pan Stanislav approached the players, as Plavitski was saying in a sour, outspoken tone, to his partner,--
"Rubicon after Rubicon. Ha! it is difficult. You represent new times, and I old traditions. I must be beaten."
"What has that to do with piquet?" asked Bigiel, calmly.
Marynia returned soon, with the announcement that tea was ready; her eyes were somewhat red, but her face was clear and calm. When, a little later, Bigiel and Plavitski sat down at cards again, she conversed with Pan Stanislav in that quiet, confiding tone which people use who are very near to each other, and who have many mutual relations. It is true that those mutual relations between them had been created by the death of Litka and the misfortune of Pani Emilia,--hence the conversation could not be gladsome; but in spite of that, Marynia's eyes, if not her lips, smiled at Pan Stanislav, and were at once thoughtful and clear.
Later in the evening, after his departure, Marynia did not name him in her mind, when she thought of him, otherwise, than "Pan Stas."
Pan Stanislav, on his part, returned home feeling calmer by far than he had since Litka's death. While pacing his chamber, he made frequent halts before the little girl's photograph, and looked, too, at the four birches painted by Marynia. He thought that the bond fastened between him and Marynia by Litka was becoming closer each day, as if without any one's will, and simply by some mysterious force of things. He thought, too, that if he lacked the former original desire to make that bond permanent, his courage would almost fail to cut it decisively, especially so soon after Litka's death. Late in the night he sat down to the lists sent by Mashko. At times, however, he made mistakes in the reckoning, for he saw before him Marynia's head inclining forward, and her tears falling on the box of pearls.
Next morning he bought the oak in Kremen, very profitably, for that matter.