Chapter XXIII…

Chapter XXIII

CASES OF CONSCIENCE, AND DIRECTIONS AGAINST BACKBITING, SLANDERING, AND EVIL SPEAKING.

Tit. 1. Cases of Conscience about Backbiting and Evil-speaking.

Quest. I. May I not speak evil of that which is evil? and call every one truly as he is?

Answ. You must not speak a known falsehood of any man under pretence of charity or speaking well. But you are not to speak all the evil of every man which is true: as opening the faults of the king or your parents, though never so truly, is a sin against the fifth commandment, "Honour thy father and mother:" so if you do it without a call, you sin against your neighbour's honour, and many other ways offend.

Quest. II. Is it not sinful silence, and a consenting to or countenancing of the sins of others, to say nothing against them, as tender of their honour?

Answ. It is sinful to be silent when you have a call to speak: if you forbear to admonish the offender in love between him and you, when you have opportunity and just cause, it is sinful to be silent then. But to silence backbiting is no sin. If you must be guilty of every man's sin that you talk not against behind his back, your whole discourse must be nothing but backbiting.

Quest. III. May I not speak that which honest, religious, credible persons do report?

Answ. Not without both sufficient evidence and a sufficient call. You must not judge of the action by the person, but of the person by the action. Nor must you imitate any man in evil-doing. If a good man abuse you, are you willing that all men follow him and abuse you more?

Quest. IV. May I believe the bad report of an honest, credible person?

Answ. You must first consider whether you may hear it, or meddle with it: for if it be a case that you have nothing to do with, you may not set your judgment to it, either to believe it, or to disbelieve it. And if it be a thing that you are called to judge of, yet every honest man's word is not presently to be believed: you must first know whether it be a thing that he saw, or is certain of himself, or a thing which he only taketh upon report; and what his evidence and proof is; and whether he be not engaged by interest, passion, or any difference of opinion; or be not engaged in some contrary faction, where the interest of a party or cause is his temptation; or whether he be not used to rash reports and uncharitable speeches; and what concurrence of testimonies there is, and what is said on the other side; especially what the person accused saith in his own defence. If it be so heinous a crime in public judgment, to pass sentence before both parties are heard, and to condemn a man before he speak for himself; it cannot be justifiable in private judgment. Would you be willing yourselves that all should be believed of you, which is spoken by any honest man? And how uncertain are we of other men's honesty, that we should on that account think ill of others!

Quest. V. May I not speak evil of them that are enemies to God, to religion and godliness, and are open persecutors of it; or are enemies to the king or church?

Answ. You may on all meet occasions speak evil of the sin; and of the persons when you have a just call; but not at your own pleasure.

Quest. VI. What if it be one whose honour and credit countenanceth an ill cause, and his dishonour would disable him to do hurt?

Answ. You may not belie the devil, nor wrong the worst man that is, though under pretence of doing good; God needeth not malice, nor calumnies, nor injustice to his glory: it is an ill cause that cannot be maintained without such means as these. And when the matter is true, you must have a call to speak it, and you must speak it justly, without unrighteous aggravations, or hiding the better part, which should make the case and person better understood. There is a time and due manner, in which that man's crimes and just dishonour may be published, whose false reputation injureth the truth. But yet I must say, that a great deal of villany and slander is committed upon this plausible pretence; and that there is scarce a more common cloak for the most inhuman lies and calumnies.

Quest. VII. May I not lawfully make a true narration of such matters of fact, as are criminal and dishonourable to offenders? Else no man may write a true history to posterity of men's crimes.

Answ. When you have a just call to do it, you may; but not at your own pleasure. Historians may take much more liberty to speak the truth of the dead, than you may of the living: though no untruth must be spoken of either: yet the honour of princes and magistrates while they are alive is needful to their government, and therefore must be maintained, ofttimes by the concealment of their faults: and so proportionably the honour of other men is needful to a life of love, and peace, and just society; but when they are dead, they are not subjects capable of a right to any such honour as must be maintained by such silencing of the truth, to the injury of posterity: and posterity hath usually a right to historical truth, that good examples may draw them to imitation, and bad examples may warn them to take heed of sin. God will have the name of the wicked to rot; and the faults of a Noah, Lot, David, Solomon, Peter, &c. shall be recorded. Yet nothing unprofitable to posterity may be recorded of the dead, though it be true; nor the faults of men unnecessarily divulged; much less may the dead be slandered or abused.

Quest. VIII. What if it be one that hath been oft admonished in vain? May not the faults of such a one be mentioned behind his back?

Answ. I confess such a one (the case being proved, and he being notoriously impenitent) hath made a much greater forfeiture of his honour than other men; and no man can save that man's honour who will cast it away himself. But yet it is not every one that committeth a sin after admonition, who is here to be understood; but such as are impenitent in some mortal or ruling sin: for some may sin oft in a small and controverted point, for want of ability to discern the truth; and some may live in daily infirmities, (as the best men do,) which they condemn themselves for, and desire to be delivered from. And even the most impenitent man's sins must not be meddled with by every one at his pleasure, but only when you have just cause.

Quest. IX. What if it be one whom I cannot speak to face to face?

Answ. You must let him alone, till you have just cause to speak of him.

Quest. X. When hath a man a just cause and call to open another's faults?

Answ. Negatively: 1. Not to fill up the time with other idle chat, or table talk. 2. Not to second any man, how good soever, who backbiteth others; no, though he pretend to do it to make the sin more odious, or to exercise godly sorrow for other men's sin. 3. Not whenever interest, passion, faction, or company seemeth to require it. But, affirmatively, 1. When we may speak it to his face in love and privacy, in due manner and circumstances, as is most hopeful to conduce to his amendment. 2. When, after due admonition, we take two or three, and after that tell the church (in a case that requireth it). 3. When we have a sufficient cause to accuse him to the magistrate. 4. When the magistrate or the pastors of the church, reprove or punish him. 5. When it is necessary to the preservation of another: as if I see my friend in danger of marrying with a wicked person, or taking a false servant, or trading and bargaining with one that is like to over-reach him, or going among cheaters, or going to hear or converse with a dangerous heretic or seducer; I must open the faults of those that they are in danger of, so far as their safety and my charity require. 6. When it is any treason or conspiracy against the king or commonwealth; where my concealment may be an injury to the king, or damage or danger to the kingdom. 7. When the person himself doth, by his self-justification, force me to it. 8. When his reputation is so built upon the injury of others, and slanders of the just, that the justifying of him is the condemning of the innocent, we may then indirectly condemn him, by vindicating the just; as if it be in a case of contention between two, if we cannot justify the right without dishonour to the injurious, there is no remedy but he must bear his blame. 9. When a man's notorious wickedness hath set him up as a spectacle of warning and lamentation, so that his crimes cannot be hid, and he hath forfeited his reputation, we must give others warning by his fall: as an excommunicate person, or malefactor at the gallows, &c. 10. When we have just occasion to make a bare narrative of some public matters of fact; as of the sentence of a judge, or punishment of offenders, &c. 11. When the crime is so heinous, as that all good persons are obliged to join to make it odious, as Phinehas was to execute judgment. As in cases of open rebellion, treason, blasphemy, atheism, idolatry, murders, perjury, cruelty; such as the French massacre, the Irish far greater massacre, the murdering of kings, the powder-plot, the burning of London, &c. Crimes notorious should not go about in the mouths or ears of men, but with just detestation. 12. When any person's false reputation is a seducement to men's souls, and made by himself or others the instruments of God's dishonour, and the injury of church or state, or others, though we may do no unjust thing to blast his reputation, we may tell the truth so far as justice, or mercy, or piety requireth it.

Quest. XI. What if I hear daubers applauding wicked men, and speaking well of them, and extenuating their crimes, and praising them for evil doing?

Answ. You must on all just occasions speak evil of sin; but when that is enough, you need not meddle with the sinner; no, not though other men applaud him, and you know it be false; for you are not bound to contradict every falsehood which you hear. But if in any of the twelve forementioned cases you have a call to do it, (as for the preservation of the hearers from a snare thereby; as if men commend a traitor or a wicked man to draw another to like his way,) in such cases you may contradict the false report.

Quest. XII. Are we bound to reprove every backbiter, in this age when honest people are grown to make little conscience of it, but think it their duty to divulge men's faults?

Answ. Most of all, that you may stop the stream of this common sin, ordinarily whenever we can do it without doing greater hurt, we should rebuke the tongue that reporteth evil of other men causelessly behind their backs; for our silence is their encouragement in sin.

Tit. 2. Directions against Backbiting, Slandering, and Evil Speaking.

Direct. I. Maintain the life of brotherly love. Love your neighbour as yourself.

Direct. II. Watch narrowly lest interest or passion should prevail upon you. For where these prevail, the tongue is set on fire of hell, and will set on fire the course of nature, James ii. Selfishness and passion will not only prompt you to speak evil, but also to justify it, and think you do well; yea, and to be angry with those that will not hearken to you and believe you.

Direct. III. Especially involve not yourselves in any faction, religious or secular. I do not mean that you should not imitate the best, and hold most intimate communion with them; but that you abhor unlawful divisions and sidings; and when error, or uncharitableness, or carnal interest hath broken the church into pieces where you live, and one is of Paul, and another of Apollos, and another of Cephas, one of this party, and another of that, take heed of espousing the interest of any party, as it stands cross to the interest of the whole. It would have been hardly credible, if sad experience had not proved it, how commonly and heinously almost every sect of christians do sin in this point against each other! and how far the interest of their sect, which they account the interest of Christ, will prevail with multitudes even of zealous people, to belie, calumniate, backbite, and reproach those that are against their opinion and their party! yea, how easily will they proceed beyond reproaches, to bloody persecutions! He that thinketh he doth God service by killing Christ or his disciples, will think that he doth him service by calling him a deceiver, and one that hath a devil, a blasphemer, and an enemy to Cæsar, and calling his disciples pestilent fellows and movers of sedition among the people, and accounting them as the filth and offscouring of the world. That zeal which murdered and destroyed many hundred thousand of the Waldenses and Albigenses, and thirty thousand or forty thousand in one French massacre, and two hundred thousand in one Irish massacre, and which kindled the Maryan bonfires in England, made the powder mine, and burnt the city of London, and keepeth up the Inquisition, I say, that zeal will certainly think it a service to the church, (that is, their sect,) to write the most odious lies and slanders of Luther, Zuinglius, Calvin, Beza, and any such excellent servants of the Lord. So full of horrid, impudent lies are the writings of (not one but) many sects against those that were their chief opposers, that I still admonish all posterity, to see good evidence for it, before they believe the hard sayings of any factious historian or divine, against those that are against his party. It is only men of eminent conscience, and candour, and veracity, and impartiality, who are to be believed in their bad report of others, except where notoriety or very good evidence doth command belief above their own authority and veracity. A siding factious zeal, which is hotter for any sect or party, than for the common christianity and catholic church, is always a railing, a lying, and a slandering zeal, and is notably described, James iii. as "earthly, sensual, and devilish," causing "envy, strife, and confusion, and every evil work."

Direct. IV. Observe well the commonness of this sin of backbiting, that it may make you the more afraid of falling into that which so few do escape. I will not say, among high and low, rich and poor, court and country, how common is this sin; but among men professing the greatest zeal and strictness in religion, how few make conscience of it! Mark in all companies that you come into, how common it is to take liberty to say what they think of all men; yea, to report what they hear, though they dare not say that they believe it! And how commonly the relating of other men's faults, and telling what this man or that man is, or did, or said, is part of the chat to waste the hour in! And if it be but true, they think they sin not: nay, nor if they did but hear that it is true. For my part I must profess, that my conscience having brought me to a custom of rebuking such backbiters, I am ordinarily censured for it, either as one that loveth contradiction, or one that defendeth sin and wickedness, by taking part with wicked men; all because I would stop the course of this common vice of evil speaking and backbiting where men have no call. And I must thankfully profess, that among all other sins in the world, the sins of selfishness, pride, and backbiting, I have been most brought to hate and fear, by the observation of the commonness of them, even in persons seeming godly: nothing hath fixed an apprehension of their odiousness so deeply in me, nor engaged my heart against them above all other sins so much, as this lamentable experience of their prevalence in the world, among the more religious, and not only in the profane.

Direct. V. Take not the honesty of the person, as a sufficient cause to hear or believe a bad report of others. It is lamentable to hear how far men, otherwise honest, do too often here offend. Suspect evil speakers, and be not over-credulous of them. Charity thinketh not evil, nor easily and hastily believeth it. Liars are more used to evil speaking, than men of truth and credit are. It is no wrong to the best, that you believe him not when he backbiteth without good evidence.

Direct. VI. Rebuke backbiters, and encourage them not by hearkening to their tales. Prov. xxv. 23, "The north wind driveth away rain, so doth an angry countenance a backbiting tongue." It may be they think themselves religious persons, and will take it for an injury to be driven away with an angry countenance: but God himself, who loveth his servants better than we, is more offended at their sin; and that which offendeth him, must offend us. We must not hurt their souls, and displease God, by drawing upon us the guilt of their sins, for fear of displeasing them. Tell them how God doth hate backbiting, and advise them if they know any hurt by others, to go to them privately, and tell them of it in a way that tendeth to their repentance.

Direct. VII. Use to make mention of the good which is in others; (except it be unseasonable, and will seem to be a promoting of their sin): God's gifts in every man deserve commendations; and we have allowance to mention men's virtues oftener than to mention their vices. Indeed when a bad man is praised in order to the disparagement of the good, or to honour some wicked cause or action against truth and godliness, we must not concur in such malicious praises; but otherwise we must commend that which is truly commendable in all. And this custom will have a double benefit against backbiting: it will use your own tongues to a contrary course, and it will rebuke the evil tongues of others, and be an example to them of more charitable language.

Direct. VIII. Understand yourselves, and speak often to others, of the sinfulness of evil-speaking and backbiting. Show them the scriptures which condemn it, and the intrinsical malignity which is in it: as here followeth.

Direct. IX. Make conscience of just reproof and exhorting sinners to their faces. Go tell them of it privately and lovingly, and it will have better effects, and bring you more comfort, and cure the sin of backbiting.

Tit. 3. The Evil of Backbiting and Evil-speaking.

1. It is forbidden of God among the heinous, damning sins, and made the character of a notorious wicked person, and the avoiding of it is made the mark of such as are accepted of God and shall be saved: Rom. i. 29, 30, it is made the mark of a reprobate mind, and joined with murder, and hating God, viz. "full of envy, debate, deceit, malignity, whisperers, backbiters." Psal. xv. 2, 3, "Lord, who shall abide in thy tabernacle? who shall dwell in thy holy hill? He that backbiteth not with his tongue, nor doeth evil to his neighbour, nor taketh up a reproach against his neighbour." And when Paul describeth those whom he must sharply rebuke and censure, he just describeth the factious sort of christians of our times. 2 Cor. xii. 20, "For I fear lest when I come, I shall not find you such as I would, and that I shall be found unto you such as ye would not: lest there be debates, envyings, wraths, strifes, backbitings, whisperings, swellings, tumults." Eph. iv. 31, "Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil-speaking be put away from you, with all malice, and be kind one to another, and tender-hearted--."

2. It is a sin which gratifieth Satan, and serveth his malice against our neighbour. He is malicious against all, and speaking evil, and doing hurt, are the works which are suitable to his malignity! And should a christian make his tongue the instrument of the accuser of the brethren, to do his work against each other?

3. It signifieth want of christian love. For love speaketh not evil, nor openeth men's faults without a cause, but covereth infirmities; much less will it lie and slander others, and carry about uncertain reports against them. It is not to do as you would be done by: and how essential love is to true christianity, Christ himself hath often told us.

4. It is a sin which directly serveth to destroy the hearers' love, and consequently to destroy their souls. If the backbiter understood himself, he would confess that it is his very end to cause you to hate (or abate your love to) him whom he speaketh evil of. He that speaketh good of a man, representeth him amiable; for amiableness and goodness are all one. And he that speaketh evil of a man representeth him hateful or unlovely; for hatefulness, unloveliness, and evil are all one. And as it is not the natural way of winning love, to entreat and beg it, and say, I pray you love this person, or that thing; but to open the goodness of the thing or person, which will command love: so is it not the natural way to stir up hatred, by entreating men to hate this man or that; but to tell how bad they are, which will command hatred in them that do believe it. Therefore to speak evil of another, is more than to say to the hearers, I pray you hate this man, or abate your love to him. And that the killing of love is the killing or destroying of men's souls, the apostle John doth frequently declare.

5. And it tendeth also to destroy the love, and consequently the soul of him that you speak evil of. For when it cometh to his hearing, (as one way or other it may do,) what evil you have reported of him behind his back, it tendeth to make him hate you, and so to make him worse.

6. It is a great make-bate and peace-breaker wherever it is practised. It tendeth to set people together by the ears. When it is told that such a one spake evil of you in such a place, there are then heart-burnings, and rehearsals, and sidings, and such ensuing malice as the devil intended by this design.

7. They that use to speak evil of others behind their backs, it is ten to one will speak falsehoods of them when they do not know it. Fame is too ordinarily a liar, and they shall be liars who will be its messengers. How know you whether the thing that you report is true? Is it only because a credible person spake it? But how did that person know it to be true? Might he not take it upon trust as well as you? And might he not take a person to be credible that is not? And how commonly doth faction, or interest, or passion, or credulity, make that person incredible in one thing, who is credible in others, where he hath no such temptation! If you know it not to be true, or have not sufficient evidence to prove it, you are guilty of lying and slandering interpretatively, though it should prove true; because it might have been a lie for aught you knew.

8. It is gross injustice to talk of a man's faults, before you have heard him speak for himself. I know it is usual with such to say, O we have heard it from such as we are certain will not lie. But he is a foolish and unrighteous judge, that will be peremptory upon hearing one party only speak, and knoweth not how ordinary it is for a man when he speaketh for himself, to blow away the most confident and plausible accusations, and make the case appear to be quite another thing. You know not what another man hath to say till you have heard him.

9. Backbiting teacheth others to backbite. Your example inviteth them to do the like: and sins which are common, are easily swallowed, and hardly repented of: men think that the commonness justifieth or extenuateth the fault.

10. It encourageth ungodly men to the odious sin of backbiting and slandering the most religious, righteous person. It is ordinary with the devil's family to make Christ's faithfullest servants their table talk, and the objects of their reproach and scorn, and the song of drunkards? What abundance of lies go current among such malignant persons, against the most innocent, which would all be ashamed, if they had first admitted them to speak for themselves. And such slanders and lies are the devil's common means to keep ungodly men from the love of godliness, and so from repentance and salvation. And backbiting professors of religion encourage men to this; for with what measure they mete, it shall be measured to them again. And they that are themselves evil spoken of, will think that they are warranted to requite the backbiters with the like.

11. It is a sin which commonly excludeth true, profitable reproof and exhortation. They that speak most behind men's backs, do usually say least to the sinner's face, in any way which tendeth to his salvation. They will not go lovingly to him in private, and set home his sin upon his conscience, and exhort him to repentance; but any thing shall serve as a sufficient excuse against this duty; that they may make the sin of backbiting serve instead of it: and all is out of carnal self-saving; they fear men will be offended if they speak to their faces, and therefore they will whisper against them behind their backs.

12. It is at the least, but idle talk and a misspending of your time: what the better are the hearers for hearing of other men's misdoings? And you know that it no whit profiteth the person of whom you speak. A skilful, friendly admonition might do him good! But to neglect this, and talk of his faults unprofitably, behind his back, is but to aggravate the sin of your uncharitableness, as being not contented to refuse your help to a man in sin, but you must also injure him and do him hurt.

Spotted a typo or a problem in this chapter? Tell us

Chapter XXIV

CASES AND DIRECTIONS AGAINST CENSORIOUSNESS AND UNWARRANTABLE JUDGING.

Tit. 1. Cases of Conscience about Judging of Others.

Quest. I. Am I not bound to judge truly of every one as he is?

Answ. 1. There are many that you are not bound to meddle with, and to pass any judgment at all upon. 2. There are many whose faults are secret, and their virtues open; and of such you cannot judge as they are, because you have no proof or evidence to enable you: you cannot see that which is latent in the heart, or done in darkness. 3. You neither ought on pretence of charity, nor can believe an evident known untruth of any man.

Quest. Doth not charity bind me to judge men better than they are?

Answ. Charity bindeth you, 1. Rather to observe the best in them, than the worst. 2. And, as I said, to judge of no man's faults uncalled. 3. Nor to judge of that which is not evident, but out of sight; and thus consequently it bindeth you to judge some men to be better than they are; but not directly.

Object. Then a man is bound to err and believe an untruth.

Answ. No: you are not bound to believe that it is certainly true, that such a man is better than he is; because you have no evidence of its certain truth. But you are bound to believe it a thing probable or verisimile, likely to be true, by an opinion or fallible human faith; and this is not a falsehood; for that is likely and probable to you, which hath the more probable evidence, and more for it than against it: so that the thing which you are to believe immediately is this proposition, There is more evidence to me to prove it likely that this man is sincere than contrary: and consequently you believe this, and believe not the contrary, because the contrary hath no evidence. But you are not to take it as a certain thing, that the contrary hath no latent reality.

Quest. II. How far may I judge ill of one by outward appearances, as by the countenance, gestures, and other uncertain but suspicious signs?

Answ. There are some signs which are not so much as probable, but a little suspicious, and which men are very ordinarily mistaken by: as those that will judge of a man at the first look by his face; and those that will judge a studious, serious person (a lawyer, a judge, or a divine) to be morose or proud, because they are not complimental, but of few words; or because they have not patience to waste precious hours in hearing an empty vessel sound, an ignorant, self-conceited person talk foolishly. Such censures are but the effects of injudiciousness, unrighteousness, and rash haste. There are other signs which make it probable to a wise and charitable person, that the man is bad (e. g. proud, or covetous, or a hypocrite). If with these, there are as great sins to make the contrary probable, we must rather incline to the better than the worse. But if not, we may fear the worst of that person, but not conclude it as a certainty; and therefore we may not in public censures, proceed upon such uncertainties, nor venture to divulge them; but only use them to help us for due caution, and pity, and prayer, and endeavour for such a one's recovery and help.

Quest. III. How far may I censure upon the report of others?

Answ. According to the degree of the credibility of the persons, and evidence of the narrative; not simply in themselves, but as compared with all that is to be heard on the contrary part; else you are partial and unjust.

Quest. IV. Doth not the fifth command oblige me in honour to parents and princes, to judge them to be better than their lives declare them to be?

Answ. You are gradually to honour them more than others, and therefore to be more afraid of dishonouring them, and must not sit in judgment on them, to believe any harm of them, which evidence doth not compel you to believe. But you are not to judge any sin the less, because it is theirs; nor to judge contrary to evidence, nor to call evil good, nor to be wilfully blind, nor to flatter any in their sin.

Quest. V. Whom must we judge for sincere and sanctified christians?

Answ. 1. All those that profess to be such, whom you cannot disprove. 2. But as there are several degrees of evidence and probability, so must there be several degrees of your good opinion of others. Of some who give you the highest probability, you may have the strongest confidence short of certainty: of others you may have less; and of some you may have much more fear than hope. 3. And yet in matters of church rights and public communion, your fears will not allow you to use them as no christians; for their profession of faith and repentance is certain; and as long as your fears of their hypocrisy or unsoundness are but uncertain, it must not (on that account) prevail to deprive another of his right.

Quest. VI. But is not my error my sin, if I prove mistaken, and take that man for a sincere christian who is none?

Answ. If you judged it to be certain, your judgment and error was your sin; but if you only judged him a professor of christianity, and one that on that account you were bound to have church communion with as if he were sincere, because you cannot prove the contrary, this was no error; or if you erred for want of sufficient evidence to know the truth, this error is not in itself a sin.

Quest. VII. Whom must I judge a visible member of the church, with whom I am thus bound to hold communion?

Answ. 1. If you are the pastor of the church who are made the judge, at his admission by baptism, or afterwards, you must so judge of every one who maketh a credible profession of true christianity, that is, of his present consent to the sacramental covenant: and that profession is credible, which is, 1. Understood by him that maketh it. 2. Deliberate. 3. Voluntary. 4. Seemingly serious. 5. And is not disproved by valid evidence of the contrary. These are the true measures of church communion; for every man, next God, is the judge of his own heart; and God would have every man the chooser or refuser of his own mercies.

2. But if you are but a private member of the church, you are to judge that person a visible member of the church, whom the pastor hath taken in by baptism, and not cast out again by excommunication; except the contrary be notorious: and even then you are oft obliged for order sake to carry yourself towards him as a visible member, till he be regularly cast out.

Quest. VIII. Whom must I judge a true worshipper of God, and whom not?

Answ. Him that professeth true christianity, and joineth in true worship with a christian church, or privately (when hindered) acknowledgeth the true God in all his essential attributes, and heareth his word, and prayeth to him for all things necessary to salvation, and praiseth him accordingly, not giving the worship proper to God unto any creature; and doth all this as a sinner redeemed by Jesus Christ, trusting in his merits, sacrifice, and intercession, and giveth not his office to any other. And he is a false worshipper who denieth any essential attribute of God, or essential part of the office of Christ, or giveth these to any other; or refuseth his word, or excludeth in his prayers any thing essential to christianity, or absolutely necessary to salvation. But secundum quid, in lesser parts, or in circumstances, or measures, every man on earth is a false worshipper, that is, he offereth God a worship some way faulty and imperfect, and hath some sin in his worshipping of God; and sin is a thing that God requireth not, but forbiddeth even in the smallest measures.

Quest. IX. Which must I judge a true church of Christ, and which a false church?

Answ. The universal church is but one, and is the whole society of christians as united to Christ their only Head; and this cannot be a false church. But if any other set up a usurper as the universal head, and so make another policy and church, this is a false church formally, or in its policy; but yet the members of this false church or policy may some of them as christians be also members of the true church of Christ: and thus the Roman church as papal is a false catholic church, having the policy of a usurper; but as christians they may be members of the true catholic church of Christ. But for a particular church which is but part of the universal, that is a true church considered merely as an ungoverned community, which is a true part of the catholic, prepared for a pastor, but yet being without one: but that only is a true political church, which consisteth of professed christians conjoined under a true pastor, for communion in the profession of true christianity, and for the true worshipping of God, and orderly walking for their mutual assistance and salvation.

Quest. X. Whom must we judge true prophets and pastors of the church.

Answ. He is a true prophet who is sent by God, and speaketh truth by immediate supernatural revelation or inspiration. And he is a false prophet who either falsely saith that he hath divine revelations or inspiration, or prophesieth falsehood as from God. And he is a true pastor at the bar of God, who is, 1. Competently qualified with abilities for the office. 2. Competently disposed to it, with willingness and desire of success; and hath right ends in undertaking and discharging it. 3. Who hath a just admission, by true ordination of pastors, and consent of the flock; and he is to be accounted a true pastor in foro ecclesia, in the church's judgment, whom the church judgeth to have all these qualifications, and thereupon admitteth him into possession of the place, till his incapacity be notoriously or publicly and sufficiently proved, or he be removed or made uncapable.

Tit. 2. Directions for the Cure of Sinful Censoriousness.

Direct. I. Meddle not at all in judging of others without a call. Know first whether it be any of your work; if not, be afraid of those words of your Judge, Matt. vii. 1-5, "Judge not, that ye be not judged; for with what judgment ye judge, you shall be judged," &c. And Rom. xiv. 4, "Who art thou that judgest another man's servant? To his own master he standeth or falleth." And verses 10, and 13, "But why dost thou judge thy brother? or why dost thou set at nought thy brother? We shall all stand before the judgment-seat of Christ.--Every one of us shall give account of himself to God. Let us not therefore judge one another any more." 1 Cor. iv. 3-5, "But with me it is a very small thing that I should be judged of you, or of man's judgment--Therefore judge nothing before the time till the Lord come, who both will bring to light the hidden things of darkness, and will make manifest the counsels of the hearts--." Col. ii. 16, "Let no man judge you in meat or in drink, or in respect of any holy day, or of the new moon, or sabbath."

Quest. But when have I a call to judge another?

Answ. You may take the answer to this from the answer to quest. x. chap. xxiii. tit. 1. 1. If your office and place require it as a magistrate, pastor, parent, master, tutor, &c. 2. If the safety of the church or your neighbour do require it. 3. If the good of the sinner require it that you may seek his repentance and reformation. 4. If your own preservation or welfare (or any other duty) require it.

Direct. II. Keep up a humble sense of your own faults, and that will make you compassionate to others. He that is truly vile in his own eyes, is least inclined to vilify others: and he that judgeth himself with the greatest penitent severity, is the least inclined to be censorious to his brother. Pride is the common cause of censoriousness: he that saith with the Pharisee, "I fast twice a week, and pay tithes of all that I have, I am no adulterer," &c. will also say, "I am not as other men, nor as this publican:" when the true penitent findeth so much of his own to be condemned, that he smiteth on his own breast and saith, "God be merciful to me a sinner." The prouder, self-conceited sort of christians are ever the most censorious of their neighbours.

Direct. III. Be much therefore at home in searching, and watching, and amending your own hearts: and then you will find so much to do about yourselves, that you will have no mind or leisure to be censuring others; whereas the superficial hypocrite, whose religion is in externals, and is unacquainted with his heart and heaven, is so little employed in the true work of a christian, that he hath leisure for the work of a censorious Pharisee.

Direct. IV. Labour for a deep experimental insight into the nature of religion, and of every duty. For no men are so censorious as the ignorant who know not what they say; whilst experienced persons know those difficulties and other reasons which calm their minds. As in common business, no man will sooner find fault with a workman in his work, than idle praters who least understand it. So is it commonly in matters of religion: women and young men that never saw into the great mysteries of divinity, but have been lately changed from a vicious life, and have neither acquaintance with the hard points of religion, nor with their own ignorance of them, are the common, proud censurers of their brethren much wiser than themselves, and of all men that are more moderate and peaceable than themselves, and are more addicted to unity, and more averse to sects and separations than they. Study harder, and wait till you grow up to the experience of the aged, and you will be less censorious and more peaceable.

Direct. V. Think not yourselves fit judges of that which you understand not: and think not proudly that you are more like to understand the difficulties in religion, with your short and lazy studies, than those that in reading, meditation, and prayer have spent their lives in searching after them. Let not pride make you abuse the Holy Ghost, by pretending that he hath given you more wisdom in a little time, and with little means and diligence, than your betters have by the holy industry of their lives: say not, God can give more to you in a year than to others in twenty; for it is a poor argument to prove that God hath done it, because he can do it. He can make you an angel, but that will not prove you one. Prove your wisdom before you pretend to it, and overvalue it not: Heb. v. 11, 12, showeth that it is God's ordinary way to give men wisdom according to their time and means, unless their own negligence deprive them of his blessing.

Direct. VI. Study to keep up christian love, and to keep it lively. For love is not censorious, but is inclined to judge the best, till evidence constrain you to the contrary. Censoriousness is a vermin which crawleth in the carcass of christian love, when the life of it is gone.

Direct. VII. Value all God's graces in his servants; and then you will see something to love them for, when hypocrites can see nothing: make not too light of small degrees of grace, and then your censure will not overlook them.

Direct. VIII. Remember the tenderness of Christ, who condemneth not the weak, nor casteth infants out of his family, nor the diseased out of his hospital; but dealeth with them in such a gracious gentleness, as beseemeth a tender-hearted Saviour: he will not break the bruised reed: he carrieth his lambs in his arms, and gently driveth those with young! He taketh up the wounded man, when the priest and Levite pass him by. And have you not need of the tenderness of Christ yourselves as well as others? Are you not afraid lest he should find greater faults with you than you find in others; and condemn you as you condemn them?

Direct. IX. Let the sense of the common corruption of the world, and imperfection of the godly, moderate your particular censures. As Seneca saith, To censure a man for that which is common to all men, is in a sort to censure him for being a man, which beseemeth not him that is a man himself. Do you not know the frailty of the best, and the common pravity of human nature? How few are there that must not have great allowance, or else they will not pass for current in the balance! Elias was a man subject to passions: Jonah to peevishness: Job had his impatience: Paul saith even of the teachers of the primitive church, "They all (that were with him) seek their own, and not the things of Jesus Christ." What blots are charged on almost all the churches, and almost all the holy persons, mentioned throughout all the Scriptures! Learn then of Paul a better lesson than censoriousness: Gal. vi. 1, "Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ. Let every man prove his own work, and then he shall have rejoicing in himself alone," &c.

Direct. X. Remember that judgment is God's prerogative (further than as we are called to it for the performance of some duty, either of office, or of private charity, or self-preservation): and that the Judge is at the door! and that judging unmercifully maketh us liable to judgment without mercy. The foresight of that near universal judgment, which will pass the doom on us and all men, will do much to cure us of our rash censoriousness.

Direct. XI. Peruse and observe all the directions in the last chapter against evil-speaking and backbiting, that I may not need to repeat them: especially avoid, 1. The snare of selfishness and interest. For most men judge of others principally by their own interest. He is the good man that is good to them, or is on their side; that loveth and honoureth them, and answereth their desires: this is the common false judgment of the corrupted, selfish world; who vilify and hate the best, because they seem unsuitable to them and their carnal interest. Therefore take heed of their judgment about any man that you have a falling out with: for it is two to one but you will wrong him through this selfishness. 2. Avoid passion; which blindeth the judgment. 3. Avoid faction; which maketh you judge of all men as they agree or disagree with your opinions, or your side and party. 4. Avoid too hasty belief of censures, and rebuke them. 5. Hear every man speak for himself before you censure him, if it be possible, and the case be not notorious.

Direct. XII. Keep still upon your mind a just and deep apprehension of the malignity of this sin of rash censuring. It is of greatest consequence to the mortifying of any sin, what apprehensions of it are upon the mind. If religious persons apprehended the odiousness of this as much as they do of swearing, drunkenness, fornication, &c. they would as carefully avoid it. Therefore I shall show you the malignity of this sin.

Tit. 3. The Evil of the Sin of Censoriousness.

1. It is a usurpation of God's prerogative, who is the Judge of all the world: it is a stepping up into his judgment-seat, and undertaking his work; as if you said, I will be God as to this action. And if he be called the antichrist, who usurpeth the office of Christ, to be the universal monarch and head of the church, you may imagine what he doth, who (though but in one point) doth set up himself in the place of God.

2. They that usurp not God's part in judging, yet ordinarily usurp the part of the magistrate or pastors of the church. As when mistaken, censorious christians refuse to come to the sacrament of communion, because many persons are there whom they judge to be ungodly, what do they but usurp the office of the pastors of the church, to whom the keys are committed for admission and exclusion, and so are the appointed judges of that case? The duty of private members is but to admonish the offender first secretly, and then before witnesses, and to tell the church if he repent not, and humbly to tell the pastors of their duty, if they neglect it: and when this is done, they have discharged their part, and must no more excommunicate men themselves, than they must hang thieves when the magistrate doth neglect to hang them.

3. Censoriousness signifieth the absence or decay of love: which inclineth men to think evil, and judge the worst, and aggravate infirmities, and overlook or extenuate any good that is in others. And there is least grace where there is least love.

4. It showeth also much want of self-acquaintance, and such heart employment as the sincerest christians are taken up with. And it showeth much want of christian humility and sense of your own infirmities and badness; and much prevalency of pride and self-conceitedness. If you knew how ignorant you are, you would not be so peremptory in judging: and if you knew how bad you are, you would not be so forward to condemn your neighbours. So that here is together the effect of much self-estrangedness, hypocrisy, and pride. Did you ever well consider the mind of Christ, when he bid them that accused the adulterous woman, John viii. 7, "He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her?" Certainly adultery was a heinous crime, and to be punished with death, and Christ was no patron of uncleanness; but he knew that it was a hypocritical sort of persons whom he spake to, who were busy in judging others rather than themselves. Have you studied his words against rash censurers, Matt. vii. 3, 4; "And why beholdest thou the mote in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and behold a beam is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite! first cast out the beam out of thine own eye, and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote which is in thy brother's eye." I know well that impenitent sinners do use to pervert all these words of Christ, against any that would bring them to repentance for their sin; and account all men rash censurers, who would make them acquainted with their unsanctified hearts and lives. But it is not their abuse of Scripture, which will justify our overpassing it with neglect. Christ spake it not for nothing; and it must be studied by his disciples.

5. Censoriousness is injustice, in that the censurers would not be so censured themselves. You will say, Yes, if we were as bad, and did deserve it. But though you have not that same fault, have you no other? And are you willing to have it aggravated, and be thus rashly judged? You do not as you would be done by: yea, commonly censurers are guilty of false judging; and whilst they take things hastily upon trust, and stay not to hear men speak for themselves, or to inquire thoroughly into the cause, they commonly condemn the innocent; and call good evil, and put light for darkness; and take away the righteousness of the righteous from him, when God hath cursed such with a woe.

6. And false censuring is the proper work of the devil, the accuser of the brethren, Rev. xii. 10, "who accuseth them before God, day and night;" And christians should not bear his image, nor do his work.

7. Censoriousness is contrary to the nature and office of Jesus Christ: he came to pardon sin, and cover the infirmities of his servants, and to cast them behind his back, and into the depth of the sea, and to bury them in his grave; and it is the censurer's work to rake them up, and to make them seem more and greater than they are, and to bring them into the open light.

8. Censoriousness causeth uncharitableness and sinful separations in the censurers: when they have conceited their brethren to be worse than they are, they must then reproach them, or have no communion with them, and avoid them as too bad for the company of such as they: or when they have usurped the pastor's work in judging, they begin the execution by sinful separation.

9. Censoriousness is an infectious sin, which easily taketh with the younger and prouder sort of christians, and so setteth them on vilifying others: and at this little gap there entereth all uncharitableness, backbitings, revilings, church divisions, and sects, yea, and too often rebellious and bloody wars at last.

10. Censoriousness is a sore temptation to them that are censured, either to contemn such as censure them, and go on the other hand too far from them; or else to comply with the errors and sinful humours of the censurers, and to strain their consciences to keep pace with the censorious.

And here I must leave it on record to posterity for their warning, that the great and lamentable actions, changes, and calamities of this age have arisen (next to gross impiety) from this sin of censoriousness producing these two contrary effects, and thereby dividing men into two contrary parties: the younger sort of religious people, and the more ignorant, and many women, having more zeal than judgment, placed too much of their religion in a sharp opposition to all ceremonies, formalities, and opinions which they thought unlawful; and were much inclined to schism and unjust separations upon that account; and therefore censured such things as antichristian, and those that used them as superstitious and temporizers; and no man's learning, piety, wisdom, or laboriousness in the ministry could save him from these sharp, reproachful censures. Hereupon one party had not humility and patience enough to endure to be so judged of; nor love and tenderness enough for such peevish christians, to bear with them in pity, as parents do with froward infants; but because these professed holiness and zeal, even holiness and zeal were brought under suspicion for their sakes; and they were taken to be persons intolerable, as unfit to lie in any building, and unmeet to submit to christian government; and therefore meet to be used accordingly. Another sort were so wearied with the profaneness and ungodliness of the vulgar rabble, and saw so few that were judiciously religious, that they thought it their duty to love and cherish the zeal and piety of their censorious weak ones, and to bear patiently with their frowardness, till ripeness and experience cured them (and so far they were right). And because they thought that they could do them no good, if they once lost their interest in them, (and were also themselves too impatient of their censure,) some of them seemed (to please them) to be more of their opinion than they were; and more of them forbore to reprove their petulance, but silently suffered them to go on; especially when they fell into the sects of antinomians, anabaptists, and separatists, they durst not reprove them as they deserved, lest they should drive them out of the hive, to some of these late swarms. And thus censoriousness in the ignorant and self-conceited drove away one part to take them as their enemies; and silenced or drew on another party to follow them that led the van in some irregular, violent actions; and the wise and sober moderators were disregarded, and in the noise of these tumults and contentions could not be heard, till the smart of either party in their suffering forced them to honour such, whom in their exaltation again they despised or abused. This is the true sum of all the tragedies in Britain of this age.

Tit. 4. Directions for those that are rashly censured.

Direct. I. Remember when you are injured by censures, that God is now trying your humility, charity, and patience; and therefore be most studious to exercise and preserve these three. 1. Take heed lest pride make you disdainful to the censurer; a humble man can bear contempt; hard censures hurt men so far as they are proud. 2. Take heed lest imbecility add to your impatience, and concur with pride: cannot you bear greater things than these? Impatience will disclose that badness in yourselves, which will make you censured much more; and it will show you as weak in one respect as the censurers are in another. 3. Take heed lest their fault do not draw you to overlook or undervalue that serious godliness which is in many of the censorious; and that you do not presently judge them hypocrites or schismatics, and abate your charity to them, or incline to handle them more roughly than the tenderness of Christ alloweth you. Remember that in all ages it hath been thus: the church hath had peevish children within, as well as persecuting enemies without; insomuch as Paul, Rom. xiv. giveth you the copy of these times, and giveth them this counsel, which from him I am giving you. The weak in knowledge were censorious, and judged the strong; the strong in knowledge were weak in charity, and contemned the weak: just as now one party saith, These are superstitious persons, and antichristian; the other saith, What giddy schismatics are these! but Paul chideth them both; one sort for censuring, and the other for despising them.

Direct. II. Take heed lest whilst you are impatient under their censures, you fall into the same sin yourselves. Do they censure you for differing in some forms or ceremonies from them? Take heed lest you over-censure them for their censoriousness: if you censure them as hypocrites who censure you as superstitious, you condemn yourselves while you are condemning them. For why will not censuring too far, prove you hypocrites also, if it prove them such?

Direct. III. Remember that Christ beareth with their weakness, who is wronged by it more than you, and is more against it. He doth not quit his title to them for their frowardness, nor cease his love, nor turn every infant out of his family that will cry and wrangle, nor every patient out of his hospital that doth complain and groan; and we must imitate our Lord, and love where he loveth, and pity where he pitieth, and be merciful as our heavenly Father is merciful.

Direct. IV. Remember how amiable a thing the least degree of grace is, even when it is clouded and blotted with infirmities. It is the divine nature, and the image of God, and the seed of glory; and therefore as an infant hath the noble nature of a man, and in all his weakness is much more honourable than the best of brutes (so that it is death to kill an infant, but not a beast): so is the most infirm and froward true christian more honourable and amiable than the most splendid infidel. Bear with them in love and honour to the image and interest of Christ.

Direct. V. Remember that you were once weak in grace yourselves; and if happy education under peaceable guides did not prevent it, it is two to one but you were yourselves censorious. Bear therefore with others as you bear with crying children, because you were once a child yourself. Not that the sin is ever the better, but you should be the more compassionate.

Direct. VI. Remember that your own strength and judgment is so great a mercy, that you should the easilier bear with a censorious tongue. The rich and noble can bear with the envious, remembering that it is happy to have that worth or felicity which men do envy. You suffer fools gladly, seeing you yourselves are wise. If you are in the right let losers talk.

Direct. VII. Remember that we shall be shortly together in heaven, where they will recant their censures, and you will easily forgive them, and perfectly love them. And will not the foresight of such a meeting cause you to bear with them, and forgive and love them now?

Direct. VIII. Remember how inconsiderable a thing it is as to your own interest, to be judged of man; and that you stand or fall to the judgment of the Lord, 1 Cor. iv. 3, 4. What are you the better or the worse for the thoughts or words of a man; when your salvation or damnation lieth upon God's judgment. It is too much hypocrisy, to be too much desirous of man's esteem and approbation, and too much troubled at his disesteem and censure, and not to be satisfied with the approbation of God. Read what is written against man-pleasing, part i.

Direct. IX. Make some advantage of other men's censures, for your own proficiency. If good men censure you, be not too quick in concluding that you are innocent, and justifying yourselves; but be suspicious of yourselves, lest they should prove the right, and examine yourselves with double diligence. If you find that you are clear in the point that you are censured for, suspect and examine lest some other sin hath provoked God to try you by these censures; and if you find not any other notable fault, let it make you the more watchful by way of prevention, seeing the eyes of God and men are on you; and it may be God's warning, to bid you take heed for the time to come. If you are thus brought to repentance, or to the more careful life, by occasion of men's censures, they will prove so great a benefit to you, that you may bear them the more easily.

Spotted a typo or a problem in this chapter? Tell us

XXV. CASES AND DIRECTIONS ABOUT TRUSTS AND SECRETS

Tit. 1. Cases of Conscience about Trusts and Secrets.

Quest. I. How are we forbidden to put our trust in man? And how may it be done?

Answ. 1. You must not trust man for more than his proportion, and what belongs to man to do: you must not expect that from him which God alone can do. 2. You must not trust a bad, unfaithful man to do that which is proper to a good and faithful man to do. 3. You must not trust the best man, being imperfect and fallible, as fully as if you supposed him perfect and infallible: but having to do with a corrupted world, we must live in it with some measure of distrust to all men (for all that Cicero thought this contrary to the laws of friendship). But especially ignorant, dishonest, and fraudulent men must be most distrusted. As Bucholtzer said to his friend that was going to be a courtier, Commendo tibi fidem diabolorum, crede et contremisce: he that converseth with diabolical men, must believe them no further than is due to the children of the father of lies. But we must trust men as men, according to the principles of veracity that are left in corrupted nature; and we must trust men so far as reason showeth us cause, from their skill, fidelity, honesty, or interest: so a surgeon, a physician, a pilot may be trusted with our lives: and the skilfuller and faithfuller any man is, the more he is to be trusted.

Quest. II. Whom should a man choose for a matter of trust?

Answ. As the matter is: one that hath wisdom, skill, and fidelity, through conscience, honesty, friendship, or his own apparent interest.

Quest. III. In what cases may I commit a secret to another?

Answ. When there is a necessity of his knowing it, or a greater probability of good than hurt by it, in the evidence which a prudent man may see.

Quest. IV. What if another commit a thing to me with charge of secrecy, and I say nothing to him, and so promise it not; am I bound to secrecy in that case?

Answ. If you have cause to believe that he took your silence for consent, and would not else have committed it to you, you are obliged in point of fidelity, as well as friendship: except it be with robbers, or such as we are not bound to deal openly with, and on terms of equality.

Quest. V. What if it be a secret, but I am under no command or promise at all about it?

Answ. You must then proceed according to the laws of charity and friendship; and not reveal that which is to the injury of another, without a greater cause.

Quest. VI. What if it be against the king, or state, or common good?

Answ. You are bound to reveal it, so far as the safety of the king, or state, or common good requireth it; yea, though you swear the contrary.

Quest. VII. What if it be only against the good of some third ordinary person.

Answ. You must endeavour to prevent his wrong, either by revealing the thing, or dissuading from it, or by such means as prudence shall tell you are the meetest, by exercising your love to one, without doing wrong to the other.

Quest. VIII. What if a man secretly intrust his estate to me, for himself or children, when he is in debt, to defraud his creditors?

Answ. You ought not to take such a trust: and if you have done it, you ought not to hold it, but resign it to him that did intrust you. Yea, and to disclose the fraud, for the righting of the creditors, except it be in such a case as that the creditor is some such vicious or oppressing person, as you are not obliged to exercise that act of charity for; or when the consequents of revealing it will be a greater hurt, than the righting of him will compensate; especially when it is against the public good.

Quest. IX. What if a delinquent intrust me with his estate or person to secure it from penalty?

Answ. If it be one that is prosecuted by a due course of justice, cujus pœna debetur reipublicæ, whose punishment the common good requireth, the case must be decided as the former: you must not take nor keep such a trust. But if it be one whose repentance giveth you reason to believe, that his impunity will be more to the common good than his punishment, and that if the magistrate knew it, he ought to spare or pardon him, in this case you may conceal his person or estate; so be it you do it not by a lie, or any other sinful means, or such as will do more hurt than good.

Quest. X. What if a friend intrust me with his estate to secure it from some great taxes or tributes to the king? May I keep such a trust or not?

Answ. No: if they be just and legal taxes, for the maintenance of the magistrate or preservation of the commonwealth: but if it be done by a usurper that hath no authority, (or done without or beyond authority, the oppressing of the subject,) you may conceal his estate or your own by lawful means.

Quest. XI. What if a man that suffereth for religion, commit his person or estate to my trust?

Answ. You must be faithful to your trust, 1. If it be true religion and a good cause for which he suffereth. 2. Or if he be falsely accused of abuses in religion. 3. Or if he be faulty, but the penalty intended, from which you secure him, is incomparably beyond his fault and unjust. Supposing still that you save him only by lawful means, and that it be not like to tend to do more hurt than good, to the cause of religion or the commonwealth.

Quest. XII. What if a papist or other erroneous person intrust me (being of the same mind) to educate his children in that way, when he is dead, and afterward I come to see the error, must I perform that trust or not?

Answ. No: 1. Because no trust can oblige you to do hurt. 2. Because it is contrary to the primary intent of your friend; which was his children's good. And you may well suppose that had he seen his error, he would have intrusted you to do accordingly: you are bound therefore to answer his primary intention, and truly to endeavour his children's good.

Quest. XIII. But what if a man to whom another hath intrusted his children, turn papist or heretic, and so thinketh error to be truth? what must he do?

Answ. He is bound to turn back again to the truth, and do accordingly.

Object. But one saith this is the truth and another that; and he thinketh he is right.

Answ. There is but one of the contraries true. Men's thinking themselves to be in the right doth not make it so. And God will not change his laws, because they misunderstand or break them: therefore still that which God bindeth them to is to return unto the truth. And if they think that to be truth which is not, they are bound to think otherwise. If you say, They cannot; it is either not true, or it is long of themselves that they cannot: and they that cannot immediately, yet mediately can do it, in the due use of means.

Quest. XIV. What if I foresee that the taking a trust may hazard my estate, or otherwise hurt me, and yet my dying (or living) friend desireth it?

Answ. How far the law of christianity or friendship oblige you to hurt yourself for his good, must be discerned by a prudent considering, what your obligations are to the person, and whether the good of your granting his desires, or the hurt to yourself, is like to be the greater, and of more public consequence: and whether you injure not your own children or others by gratifying him. And upon such comparison, prudence must determine the case.

Quest. XV. But what if afterward the trust prove more to my hurt than I foresaw?

Answ. If it was your own fault that you foresaw it not, you must suffer proportionably for that fault; but otherwise you must compare your own hurt with the orphans', in case you do not perform the trust: and consider whether they may not be relieved another way; and whether you have reason to think that if the parent were alive and knew the danger, he would expect you should perform your trust, or would discharge you of it. If it be some great and unexpected dangers, which you think upon good grounds the parent would acquit you from if he were living, you fulfil your trust if you avoid them, and do that which would have been his will if he had known it. Otherwise you must perform your promise though it be to your loss and suffering.

Quest. XVI. But what if it was only a trust imposed by his desire and will, without my acceptance or promise to perform it?

Answ. You must do as you would be done by, and as the common good, and the laws of love and friendship, do require. Therefore the quality of the person, and your obligations to him, and especially the comparing of the consequent good and evil together, must decide the case.

Quest. XVII. What if the surviving kindred of the orphan be nearer to him than I am, and they censure me and calumniate me as injurious to the orphan, may I not ease myself of the trust, and cast it upon them?

Answ. In this case also, the measure of your suffering must first be compared with the measure of the orphan's good; and then your conscience must tell you whether you verily think the parent who intrusted you, would discharge you if he were alive and knew the case. If he would, though you promised, it is to be supposed that it was not the meaning of his desire or your promise, to incur such suffering: and if you would not believe that he would not discharge you if he were alive, then if you promised you must perform; but if you promised not, you must go no further than the law of love requireth.

Quest. XVIII. What is a minister of Christ to do, if a penitent person confess secretly some heinous or capital crime to him (as adultery, theft, robbery, murder); must it be concealed or not?

Answ. 1. If a purpose of sinning be antecedently confessed, it is unlawful to further the crime, or give opportunity to it by a concealment: but it must be so far opened as is necessary for the prevention of another's wrong, or the person's sin; especially if it be treason against the king or kingdom, or any thing against the common good.

2. When the punishment of the offender is apparently necessary to the good of others, especially to right the king or country, and to preserve them from danger by the offender or any other, it is a duty to open a past fault that is confessed, and to bring the offender to punishment, rather than injure the innocent by their impunity.

3. When restitution is necessary to a person injured, you may not by concealment hinder such restitution; but must procure it to your power where it may be had.

4. It is unlawful to promise universal secrecy absolutely to any penitent. But you must tell him before he confesseth, If your crime be such, as that opening it is necessary to the preservation or righting of king, or country, or your neighbour, or to my own safety, I shall not conceal it. That so men may know how far to trust you.

5. Yet in some rare cases, (as the preservation of our parents, king, or country,) it may be a duty to promise and perform concealment, when there is no hurt like to follow but the loss or hazard of our own lives, or liberties, or estates; and consequently if no hurt be like to follow but some private loss of another, which I cannot prevent without a greater hurt.

6. If a man ignorant of the law, and of his own danger, have rashly made a promise of secrecy, and yet be in doubt, he should open the case in hypothesi only, to some honest, able lawyer, inquiring if such a case should be, what the law requireth of the pastor, or what danger he is in if he conceal it; that he may be able further to judge of the case.

7. He that made no promise of secrecy, virtual or actual, may, cæteris paribus, bring the offender to shame or punishment rather than to fall into the like himself for the concealment.

8. He that rashly promised universal secrecy, must compare the penitent's danger and his own, and consider whose suffering is like to be more to the public detriment, all things considered, and that must be first avoided.

9. He that findeth it his duty to reveal the crime to save himself, must yet let the penitent have notice of it, that he may fly and escape; unless as aforesaid, when the interest of the king, or country, or others, doth more require his punishment.

10. But when there is no such necessity of the offender's punishment, for the prevention of the hurt or wrong of others, nor any great danger by concealment to the minister himself, I think that the crime, though it were capital, should be concealed. My reasons are,

(1.) Because though every man be bound to do his best to prevent sin, yet every man is not bound to bring offenders to punishment. He that is no magistrate, nor hath a special call so to do, may be in many cases not obliged to it.

(2.) It is commonly concluded that (in most cases) a capital offender is not bound to bring himself to punishment: and that which you could not know but by his free confession, is confessed to you only on your promise of concealment, seemeth to me to put you under no other obligation to bring him to punishment than he is under himself.

(3.) Christ's words and practice, in dismissing the woman taken in adultery, showeth that it is not always a duty for one that is no magistrate to prosecute a capital offender, but that sometimes his repentance and life may be preferred.

(4.) And magistrates' pardons show the same.

(5.) Otherwise no sinner would have the benefit of a counsellor to open his troubled conscience to: for if it be a duty to detect a great crime in order to a great punishment, why not a less also in order to a less punishment. And who would confess when it is to bring themselves to punishment?

11. In those countries where the laws allow pastors to conceal all crimes that penitents freely confess, it is left to the pastor's judgment to conceal all that he discerneth may be concealed without the greater injury of others, or of the king or commonwealth.

12. There is a knowledge of the faults of others, by common fame, especially many years after the committing, which doth not oblige the hearers to prosecute the offender. And yet a crime publicly known is more to be punished (lest impunity imbolden others to the like) than an unknown crime, revealed in confession.

Tit. 2. Directions about Trusts and Secrets.

Direct. I. Be not rash in receiving secrets or any other trusts: but first consider what you are thereby obliged to, and what difficulties may arise in the performance; and foresee all the consequents as far as is possible, before you undertake the trust; that you cast not yourselves into snares by mere inconsiderateness, and prepare not for perplexities and repentance.

Direct. II. Be very careful what persons you commit either trusts or secrets to; and be sure they be trusty by their wisdom, ability, and fidelity.

Direct. III. Be not too forward in revealing your own secrets to another's trust: for, 1. You cannot be certain of any one's secrecy, where you are most confident. 2. You oblige yourself too much to please that person, who by revealing your secrets may do you hurt; and are in fear lest carelessness, or unfaithfulness, or any accident should disclose it. 3. You burden your friend with the charge and care of secrecy.[168]

Direct. IV. Be faithful to your friend that doth intrust you; remembering that perfidiousness or falseness to a friend, is a crime against humanity, and all society, as well as against christianity; and stigmatizeth the guilty in the eyes of all men, with the brand of an odious, unsociable person.

Direct. V. Be not intimate with too many, nor confident in too many; for he that hath too many intimates, will be opening the secrets of one to another.

Direct. VI. Abhor covetousness and ambition; or else a bribe or the promise of preferment, will tempt you to perfidiousness. There is no trusting a selfish, worldly man.

Direct. VII. Remember that God is the avenger of perfidiousness, who will do it severely: and that even they that are pleased and served by it, do yet secretly disdain and detest the person that doth it; because they would not be so used themselves.

Direct. VIII. Yet take not friendship or fidelity to be an obligation to perfidiousness to God, or the king, or commonwealth, or to another, or to any sin whatsoever.

[168] Quod tacitum esse velis nemini dixeris. Si tibi non imperasti, quomodo ab alio silentium speras? Martin. Dumiens, de morib.

Spotted a typo or a problem in this chapter? Tell us

Chapter XXVI

DIRECTIONS AGAINST SELFISHNESS AS IT IS CONTRARY TO THE LOVE OF OUR NEIGHBOUR.

The two tables of the law are summed up by our Saviour in two comprehensive precepts: "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and soul, and might:" and, "Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself." In the decalogue the first of these is the true meaning of the first commandment, put first because it is the principle of all obedience: and the second is the true meaning of the tenth commandment, which is therefore put last, because it is the comprehensive sum of other duties to our neighbour or injuries against him, which any other particular instances may contain; and also the principle of the duty to, or sin against, our neighbour. The meaning of the tenth commandment is variously conjectured at by expositors: some say that it speaketh against inward concupiscence and the sinful thoughts of the heart; but so do all the rest, in the true meaning of them, and must not be supposed to forbid the outward action only, nor to be any way defective: some say that it forbiddeth coveting and commandeth contentment with our state; so doth the eighth commandment; yet there is some part of the truth in both these. And the plain truth is, (as far as I can understand it,) that the sin forbidden is selfishness as opposite to the love of others, and the duty commanded is to love our neighbours; and that it is as is said, the sum of the second table, "Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself:" as the captain leadeth the van, and the lieutenant bringeth up the rear; so, "Thou shalt love God above all," is the first commandment, and "Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself," is the last, for the aforesaid reason. I shall therefore in these following directions speak to the two parts of the tenth commandment.

Direct. I. The first help against selfishness is to understand well the nature and malignity of the sin. For want of this it commonly prevaileth, with little suspicion, lamentation, and opposition. Let me briefly therefore anatomize it.

1. It is the radical, positive sin of the soul, comprehending seminally or causally all the rest. The corruption of man's nature, or his radical sin, hath two parts, the positive part, and the privative part: the positive part is selfishness, or the inordinate love of carnal self; the privative part is ungodliness or want of the love of God. Man's fall was his turning from God to himself; and his regeneration consisteth in the turning of him from himself to God; or the generating of the love of God (as comprehending faith and obedience) and the mortifying of self-love. Selfishness therefore is all positive sin in one, as want of the love of God is all privative sin in one. And self-denial and the love of God are all duties virtually; for the true love of man is comprehended in the love of God. Understand this, and you will understand what original and actual sin is, and what grace and duty are.

2. Therefore selfishness is the cause of all sin in the world, both positive and privative, and is virtually the breach of every one of God's commandments. For even the want of the love of God is caused by the inordinate love of self; as the consuming of other parts is caused by the dropsy, which tumefieth the belly. It is only selfishness which breaketh the fifth commandment, by causing rulers to oppress and persecute their subjects, and causeth subjects to be seditious and rebellious; and causeth all the bitterness, and quarrellings, and uncomfortableness, which ariseth among all relations. It is only selfishness which causeth the cursed wars of the earth, and desolation of countries, by plundering and burning; the murders which cry for revenge to heaven (whether civil, military, or religious): which causeth all the railings, fightings, envyings, malice; the schisms, and proud overvaluings of men's own understandings and opinions; and the contending of pastors, who shall be the greatest, and who shall have his will in proud usurpations and tyrannical impositions and domination: it is selfishness which hath set up and maintaineth the papacy, and causeth all the divisions between the western and the eastern churches; and all the cruelties, lies, and treachery exercised upon that account. It is selfishness which troubleth families and corporations, churches and kingdoms; which violateth vows, and bonds of friendship, and causeth all the tumults, and strifes, and troubles in the world. It is selfishness which causeth all covetousness, all pride and ambition, all luxury and voluptuousness, all surfeiting and drunkenness, chambering and wantonness, time-wasting and heart-corrupting sports, and all the riots and revelling of the sensual; all the contending for honours and preferments, and all the deceit in buying and selling, the stealing and robbing, the bribery and simony, the law-suits which are unjust, the perjuries, false witnessing, unrighteous judging, the oppressions, the revenge, and in one word, all the uncharitable and unjust actions in the world. This is the true nature of carnal selfishness, and it is no better.

3. Selfishness is the corruption of all the faculties of the soul. It is the sin of the mind, by self-conceitedness and pride; it is the sin of the will and affections, by self-love, and all the selfish passions which attend it; selfish desires, angers, sorrows, discontents, jealousies, fears, audacities, &c. It is the corruption of all the inferior faculties, and the whole conversation by self-seeking, and all the forementioned evils.

4. Selfishness is the commonest sin in the world. Every man is now born with it, and hath it more or less; and therefore every man should fear it.

5. Selfishness is the hardest sin in the world to overcome. In all the unregenerate it is predominant; for nothing but the sanctifying Spirit of God can overcome it. And in many thousands that seem very zealous in religion, and very mortified in all other respects, yet in some way or other selfishness doth so lamentably appear, yea, and is so strong in many that are sincere, that it is the greatest dishonour to the church of Christ, and hath tempted many to infidelity, or to doubt whether there be any such thing as true sanctification in the world. The persons that seemed the most mortified saints, if you do but cross them in their self-interest, or opinion, or will, or seem to slight them, or have a low esteem of them, what swellings, what heart-burnings, what bitter censurings, what proud impatience, if not schisms and separations, will it cause? God hath better servants; but too many which seem to themselves and others to be the best, are no better. How then should every christian abhor and watch against this universal evil!

Direct. II. Consider oft how amiable a creature man would be, and what a blessed condition the world and all societies would be in, if selfishness were but overcome. There would then be no pride, no covetousness, no sensuality, no tyranny or oppressing of the poor, no malice, cruelty, or persecution; no church divisions, no scandals, nothing to dishonour religion, or to hinder the saving progress of the gospel; no fraud or treacheries, no over-reaching or abusing others; no lying nor deceit, no neglect of our duty to others; in a word, no injustice or uncharitableness in the world.

Direct. III. Judge of good and evil by sober reason, and not by brutish sense. And then oft consider, whether really there be not a more excellent end than your selfish interest? even the public good of many, and the pleasing and glorifying of God. And whether all mediate good or evil should not be judged of principally by those highest ends? Sense leadeth men to selfishness or privateness of design; but true reason leadeth men to prefer the public, or any thing that is better than our self-interest.

Direct. IV. Nothing but returning by converting grace to the true love of God, and of man for his sake, will conquer selfishness. Make out therefore by earnest prayer for the Spirit of sanctification; and be sure that you have a true apprehension of the state of grace; that is, that it is indeed the love of God and man. Love is the fulfilling of the law; therefore love is the holiness of the soul: set your whole study upon the exercise and increase of love, and selfishness will die as love reviveth.

Direct. V. Study much the self-denying example and precepts of your Saviour. His life and doctrine are the liveliest representation of self-denial that ever was given to the world. Learn Christ, and you will learn self-denial. He had not sinful selfishness to mortify, yet natural self was so wonderfully denied by him, for his Father's will and our salvation, that no other book or teacher in the world will teach us this lesson so perfectly as he. Follow him from the manger, or rather from the womb, to the cross and grave; behold him in his poverty and contempt; enduring the contradiction and ingratitude of sinners, and making himself of no reputation; behold him apprehended, accused, condemned, crowned with thorns, clothed in purple, with a reed in his hand, scourged, and led away to execution, bearing his cross, and hanged up among thieves; forsaken by his own disciples, and all the world, and in part by him who is more than all the world; and consider why all this was done; for whom he did it, and what lesson he purposed hereby to teach us. Consider why be made it one half the condition of our salvation, and so great a part of the christian religion, to deny ourselves, and take up our cross and follow him; and will have no other to be his disciples, Luke xiv. 26, 31, 33. Were a crucified Christ more of our daily study, and did we make it our religion to learn and follow his holy example, self-denial would be better known and practised, and christianity would appear as it is, and not as it is misunderstood, adulterated and abused in the world. But because I have long ago written a "Treatise of Self-denial," I shall add no more.

Spotted a typo or a problem in this chapter? Tell us

XXVII. CASES AND DIRECTIONS FOR LOVING OUR NEIGHBOUR AS OURSELVES

Tit. 1. Cases of Conscience about loving our Neighbour.

Quest. I. In what sense is it that I must love my neighbour as myself? Whether in the kind, of love, or in the degree, or only in the reality.

Answ. The true meaning of the text is, you must love him according to his true worth, without the diversion and hinderance of selfishness and partiality. As you must love yourself according to that degree of goodness which is in you, and no more; so must you as impartially love your neighbour according to that degree of goodness which is in him. So that it truly extendeth to the reality, the kind and the degree of love, supposing it in both proportioned to the goodness of the object. But before this can be understood, the true nature of love must be well understood.

Quest. II. What is the true nature of love, both as to myself and neighbour?

Answ. Love is nothing but the prime motion of the will to its proper object; which is called complacence: the object of it is simple goodness, or good as such: it ariseth from suitableness between the object and the will, as appetite doth from the suitableness of the appetent fancy and food. This good, as it is variously modified, or any way differeth, doth accordingly cause or require a difference in our love; therefore that love which in its prime act and nature is but one, is diversely denominated, as its objects are diversified. To an object as simply good, in itself, it followeth the understanding's estimation, and is called, as I said, mere complacence or adhesion: to an object as not yet attained, but absent, or distant, and attainable, it is called desire or desiring love: and as expected, hope, or hoping love (which is a conjunction of desire and expectation): to an object nearest and attained, it is called fruition, or delight, or delighting love: to an object which by means must be attained, it is called seeking love, as it exciteth to the use of those means: and to an object missed it is, by accident, mourning love. But still love itself in its essential act is one and the same. As it respecteth an object which wanteth something to make it perfect, and desireth the supply of that want, it is called love of benevolence; denominated from this occasion, as it desireth to do good to him that is loved. And it is a love of the same nature which we exercise towards God, who needeth nothing, as we rejoice in that perfection and happiness which he hath; though it be not to be called properly by the same name. Goodness being the true object of love, is the true measure of it; and therefore God is infinitely and primitively good, is the prime and only simple object of our absolute, total love. And therefore those who understand no goodness in any being, but as profitable to them, or to some other creature, do know no God, nor love God as God, nor have any love but selfish and idolatrous. By this you may perceive the nature of love.

Quest. III. But may none be loved above the measure of his goodness? How then did God love us when we were not, or were his enemies? And how must we love the wicked? And how must an ungodly person love himself?

Answ. If only good, as such, be the object of love, then certainly none should be loved but in proportion to his goodness. But you must distinguish between mere natural and sensitive love or appetite, and rational love; and between love, and the effects of love; and between natural goodness in the object, and moral goodness. And so I further answer, 1. There is in every man a natural and sensitive love of himself and his own pleasure and felicity, and an averseness to death and pain and sorrow, as there is in every brute: and this God hath planted there for the preservation of the creature. This falleth not under commands or prohibitions directly, because it is not free but necessary; as no man is commanded or forbidden to be hungry, or thirsty, or weary, or the like: it is not this love which is meant when we are commanded to love our neighbour as ourselves. For I am not commanded to feel hunger, and thirst, nor to desire meat and drink by the sensitive appetite for my neighbour: nor sensitively to feel his pain or pleasure, nor to have that natural aversation from death and pain, nor sensitive desire of life and pleasure, for him as for myself. But the love here spoken of, is that volition with the due affection conjunct, which is our rational love, as being the act of our highest faculty, and falling under God's command. As to the sensitive love, it proceedeth not upon the sense or estimate of goodness in the person who loveth himself or any other (as beasts love their young ones without respect to their excellency). But it is rational love which is proportioned to the estimated goodness of the thing beloved. 2. Physical goodness may be in an object which hath no moral goodness; and this may contain a capacity of moral goodness: and each of them is amiable according to its nature and degree. 3. Beneficence is sometimes an effect of love, and sometimes an effect of wisdom only as to the object, and of love to something else; but it is never love itself. Usually benevolence is an act of love, and beneficence an effect, but not always. I may do good to another without any love to him, for some ends of my own, or for the sake of another. And a man may be obliged to greater beneficence, where he is not obliged to greater love.

And now to the instances, I further answer, 1. When we had no being, God did not properly love us in esse reali (unless you will go to our co-existence in eternity; for we were not in esse reali); but only as we were in esse cognito; which is but to love the idea in himself: but he purposed to make us, and to make us lovely, and to do us good, and so he had that which is called amor benevolentiæ to us: which properly was not love to us, but a love to himself, and the idea in his own eternal mind, which is called a loving us in esse cognito, and a purpose to make us good and lovely. That which is not lovely is not an object of love: man was not lovely indeed, when he was not; therefore he was not an object of love (but in esse cognito.) The same we say of God's loving us when we were enemies: he really loved us with complacency so far as our physical goodness made us lovely; and as morally lovely he did not love us, otherwise than in esse cognito. But he purposed to make us morally lovely, and gave us his mercies to that end; and so loved us with a love of benevolence, as it is called; which signifieth no more than out of a complacence (or love) to himself, and to us, as physically good, to purpose to make us morally good and happy. As to the incident difficulty of love beginning de novo in God, I have fully resolved it elsewhere.[169]

2. So also we must love a wicked man with a love of benevolence: which properly is but to love him in his physical worth, and his capacity of moral goodness and happiness, and thereupon (but especially through the love of God) to desire his happiness.

3. And as to the loving of ourselves, (besides the sensitive love before mentioned which respecteth self as self, and not as good,) a wicked man may rationally love himself according to his physical goodness as a man, which containeth his capacity of moral goodness, and so of being holy and serviceable to God and to good men, and happy in the fruition of God. But beyond all such goodness (which only is amiableness) no man may rationally love himself or any other, with the true formal act of love, which is complacence; though he may wish good to himself or another beyond the present goodness which is in them; nay, he wisheth them good, not because they are good, but because they want good.

And though some define loving to be bene velle alicui ut illi bene sit, to desire another's welfare, yet indeed this may be without any true formal love at all. As I may desire the welfare of my horse, without any proper love to him, even for myself and use. When God from eternity willeth to make Paul, and to convert and save him, ut illi bene sit, it is called love of benevolence; but properly it is only to be called, a will to make Paul good and lovely;[170] it being only God himself who is the original and ultimate end of that will and purpose; and himself only which he then loveth, there being nothing but himself to love; till in that instant that Paul is existent, and so really lovely. For Paul in esse cognito is not Paul; yet no reality doth oriri de novo in God; but a new respect and denomination, and in the creature new effects. (Of which elsewhere.)

Quest. IV. Must I love every one as much as myself in degree, or only some?

Answ. You must love every one impartially as yourself, according to his goodness; and you must wish as well to every one as to yourself; but you must love no man complacentially so much as yourself, who is not or seemeth not to have as much loveliness, that is, as much goodness, or as much of God, as yourself.

Quest. V. Must I love any one more than myself?

Answ. Yes, every one that is and appeareth better than yourself. Your sensitive love to another cannot be as much as to yourself; and your beneficence (ordinarily) must be most to yourself, because God in nature and his laws hath so appointed it; and your benevolence to yourself and to others must be alike; but your rational estimation, and love or complacence, (with the honour and praise attending it,) must be more to every one that is better than yourself; for that which is best is most amiable, and that which hath most of God.

Quest. VI. Will it not then follow, that I must love another man's wife and children better than mine own, when they are really better?

Answ. Yes, no doubt; but it is only with that rational, estimative love. But there is besides a love to wife and children, which is in some measure sensitive, which you are not obliged to give to others; and rationally they are more amiable to you, in their peculiar relations and respects, though others are more amiable in other respects; and besides, though you value and rationally love another more, yet the expressions must not be the same; for those must follow the relation according to God's command. You may not cohabit or embrace, nor maintain and provide for others as your own, even when you rationally love them more; the common good requires this order in the expressive part, as well as God's command.

Quest. VII. Who is my neighbour that I must love as myself?

Answ. Not devils or damned souls, who are under justice and from under mercy, and are none of our society: but, 1. Every natural man in via, being a member of God's kingdom in the same world, is to be loved as my natural self; and every spiritual man as a member of the same kingdom of Christ, must be loved as my spiritual self; and every spiritual man as such, above my natural self as such; and no natural man as such, so much as my spiritual self as such: so that no man on earth is excluded from your love, which must be impartial to all as to yourself, but proportioned to their goodness.

Quest. VIII. Are not antichrist and those that sin against the Holy Ghost excepted out of this our love, and out of our prayers and endeavours of their good?

Answ. Those that (with Zanchy) think Mahomet to be antichrist, may so conclude, because he is dead and out of our communion. Those that take the papacy to be antichrist (as most protestants do) cannot so conclude; because, as there is but one antichrist, that is, one papacy, though a hundred popes be in that seat, so every one of those popes is in via, and under mercy, and recoverable out of that condition; and therefore is to be loved and prayed for accordingly. And as for those that blaspheme the Holy Ghost, it is a sin that one man cannot certainly know in another, ordinarily at least; and therefore cannot characterize a person unfit for our love, and prayers, and endeavours.

Quest. IX. May we not hate the enemies of God? How then must we love them as ourselves?

Answ. We may and must hate sin in every one; and where it is predominant, as God is said to hate the sinner for his sin, so must we; and yet still love him as ourselves: for you must hate sin in yourselves as much or more than in any other; and if you are wicked you must hate yourselves as such; yea, if you are godly, you must secundum quid, or in that measure as you are sinful, abhor, and loathe, and hate yourselves as such; and yet you must love yourselves according to the measure of all that natural and moral goodness which is in you; and you must desire and endeavour all the good to yourselves that you can. Just so must you hate and love another; love them and hate them impartially as you must do yourselves.

Quest. X. May I not wish hurt sometimes to another, more than to myself?

Answ. You may wish a mediate hurt which tendeth to his good, or to the good of others; but you must never wish any final hurt and misery to him. You may wish your friend a vomit or bloodletting for his cure; and you may wish him some affliction, when it is needful and apt to humble him and do him good, or to restrain him from doing hurt to others; and on the same accounts, and for the public good, you may desire penal justice to be done upon him, yea, sometimes unto death; but still with a desire of the saving of his soul. And such hurt you may also wish yourself as is necessary to your good; but you are not to wish the same penalties to yourself, 1. Because you have somewhat else first to wish and do, even to repent and prevent it. 2. Because you are not bound ordinarily to do execution upon yourself. It is more in your power to repent yourself, and make repentance less necessary by humble confession and amendment, than to bring another to repentance. Yet I may add also, that hypothetically you may wish that destruction to the enemies of God in this life, which absolutely you may not wish; that is, you must desire first that they may repent, and secondly, that they may be restrained from hurting others; but if neither of these may be attained, that they may be cut off.

Tit. 2. Directions for Loving our Neighbour as Ourselves.

Direct. I. Take heed of selfishness and covetousness, the two great enemies of love. Of which I have spoken more at large before.

Direct. II. Fall out with no man; or if you do, be speedily reconciled; for passions and dissensions are the extinguishers of love.

Direct. III. Love God truly, and you will easily love your neighbour; for you will see God's image on him, or interest in him, and feel all his precepts and mercies obliging you hereunto. As 1 John iii. 11, 23; and iv. 7, 12, 20, 21.

Direct. IV. To this end let Christ be your continual study. He is the full revelation of the love of God; the lively pattern of love, and the best teacher of it that ever was in the world: his incarnation, life, and sufferings, his gospel and covenant, his intercession and preparations for our heavenly felicity, all are the great demonstrations of condescending, matchless love. Mark both God's love to us in him, and his love to man, and you will have the best directive and incentive of your love.

Direct. V. Observe all the good which is in every man. Consider of the good of humanity in his nature, and the goodness of all that truth which he confesseth, and of all that moral good which appeareth in his heart and life; and let not oversight or partiality cause you to overlook it, or make light of it. For it is goodness which is the only attractive of love; and if you overlook men's goodness, you cannot love them.

Direct. VI. Abhor and beware of a censorious disposition, which magnifieth men's faults, and vilifieth their virtues, and maketh men seem worse than indeed they are. For as this cometh from the want of love, so doth it destroy that little which is left.

Direct. VII. Beware of superstition and an erring judgment, which maketh men place religion where God never placed it. For when this hath taught you to make duties and sins of your own humour and invention, it will quickly teach you to love or hate men accordingly as they fit or cross your opinion and humour: thus many a papist loveth not those that are not subjects of the Roman monarch, and that follow not all his irrational fopperies. Many an anabaptist loveth not those that are against his opinion of re-baptizing: one loveth not those who are for liturgies, forms of worship, and church music; and many love not those who are against them; and so of other things (of which more anon).

Direct. VIII. Avoid the company of censorious backbiters and proud contemners of their brethren: hearken not to them that are causelessly vilifying others, aggravating their faults and extenuating their virtues. For such proud, supercilious persons (religious or profane) are but the messengers of Satan, by whom he entreateth you to hate your neighbour, or abate your love to him. And to hear them speak evil of others, is but to go hear a sermon against charity, which may take with such hearts as ours before we are aware.

Direct. IX. Keep still the motives and incentives of love upon your minds. Which I shall here next set before you.

Tit. 3. The Reasons or Motives of Love to our Neighbour.

Motive I. Consider well of the image and interest of God in man. The worst man is his creature, and hath his natural image, though not his moral image; and you should love the work for the workman's sake. There is something of God upon all human nature above the brutes; it is intelligent, and capable of knowing him, of loving him, and of serving him; and possibly may be brought to do all this better than you can do it. Undervalue not the noble nature of man, nor overlook that of God which is upon them, nor the interest which he hath in them.

Motive II. Consider well of God's own love to man. He hateth their sins more than any of us; and yet he loveth his workmanship upon them: "And maketh his sun to shine and his rain to fall on the evil and on the good, on the just and on the unjust," Matt. v. 45. And what should more stir us up to love, than to be like to God?

Motive III. And think oft of the love of Christ unto mankind; yea, even unto his enemies. Can you have a better example, a livelier incentive, or a surer guide?

Motive IV. Consider of our unity of nature with all men: suitableness breedeth and maintaineth love. Even birds and beasts do love their kind; and man should much more have a love to man, as being of the same specific form.

Motive V. Love is the principle of doing good to others. It inclineth men to beneficence: and all men call him good who is inclined to do good.

Motive VI. Love is the bond of societies; of families, cities, kingdoms, and churches: without love, they will be but enemies conjunct; who are so much the more hurtful and pernicious to each other, by how much they are nearer to each other. The soul of societies is gone when love is gone.

Motive VII. Consider why it is that you love yourselves, (rationally,) and why it is that you would be beloved of others. And you will see that the same reasons will be of equal force to call for love to others from you.

Motive VIII. What abundance of duty is summarily performed in love! And what abundance of sin is avoided and prevented by it! If it be the fulfilling of the law, it avoideth all the violations of the law (proportionably). So far as you have love, you will neither dishonour superiors, nor oppress inferiors, nor injure equals: you will neither covet that which is your neighbour's, nor envy, nor malice them, nor defame, nor backbite, nor censure them unjustly; nor will you rob them or defraud them, nor withhold any duty or kindness to them.

Motive IX. Consider how much love pleaseth God; and why it is made so great a part of all your duty; and why the gospel doth so highly commend it, and so strictly command it, and so terribly condemn the want of it! And also how suitable a duty it is for you, who are obliged by so much love of God! These things well studied will not be without effect.

Motive X. Consider also that it is your own interest, as well as your great duty. 1. It is the soundness and honesty of your hearts. 2. It is pleasing to that God on whom only you depend. 3. It is a condition of your receiving the saving benefits of his love. 4. It is an amiable virtue, and maketh you lovely to all sober men: all men love a loving nature, and hate those that hate and hurt their neighbours. Love commandeth love, and hurtfulness is hatefulness. 5. It is a sweet, delightful duty: all love is essentiated with some complacence and delight. 6. It tendeth to the ease and quietness of your lives. What contentions and troubles will love avoid! What peace and pleasure doth it cause in families, neighbourhoods, and all societies! And what brawling vexations come where it is wanting! It will make all your neighbours and relations to be a comfort and delight to you, which would be a burden and trouble, if love were absent. 7. It maketh all other men's felicity and comforts to be yours. If you love them as yourselves, their riches, their health, their honours, their lordships, their kingdoms, yea, more, their knowledge, and learning, and grace, and happiness, are partly to you as your own: as the comforts of wife and children, and your dearest friends, are; and as our love to Christ, and the blessed angels and saints in heaven, do make their joys to be partly ours. How excellent, and easy, and honest a way is this, of making all the world your own, and receiving that benefit and pleasure from all things both in heaven and earth, which no distance, no malice of enemies can deny you! If those whom you truly love have it, you have it. Why then do you complain that you have no more health, or wealth, or honour, or that others are preferred before you? Love your neighbour as yourselves, and then you will be comforted in his health, his wealth, and his preferment, and say, Those have it whom I love as myself, and therefore it is to me as mine own. When you see your neighbour's houses, pastures, corn, and cattle, love will make it as good and pleasant to you as if it were your own. Why else do you rejoice in the portions and estates of your children as if it were your own? The covetous man saith, Oh how glad should I be if this house, this land, this corn were mine: but love will make you say, It is all to me as mine own. What a sure and cheap way is this of making all the world your own! Oh what a mercy doth God bestow on his servants' souls, in the day that he sanctifieth them with unfeigned love! How much doth he give us in that one grace! And oh what a world of blessing and comforts do the ungodly, the malicious, the selfish, and the censorious cast away, when they cast away or quench the love of their neighbours; and what abundance of calamity do they bring upon themselves! In this one summary instance we may see, how much religion and obedience to God doth tend to our own felicity and delight; and how easy a work it would be, if a wicked heart did not make it difficult! and how great a plague sin is unto the sinner; and how sore a punishment of itself! And by this you may see, what it is that all fallings-out, divisions, and contentions tend to; and all temptations to the abatement of our love; and who it is that is the greater loser by it, when love to our neighbour is lost; and that backbiters and censurers who speak ill of others, come to us as the greatest enemies and thieves, to rob us of our chiefest jewel and greatest comfort in this world; and accordingly should they be entertained.

[169] Apology against Dr. Kendal.

[170] But if any be resolved to call mere benevolence by the name of love, I will not contend about a name.

Spotted a typo or a problem in this chapter? Tell us

Chapter XXVIII

SPECIAL CASES AND DIRECTIONS FOR LOVE TO GODLY PERSONS AS SUCH.

Tit. 1. Cases of Conscience about Love to the Godly.

Whom we must take for godly I answered before, chap. xxiv. tit. 1. quest. v.

Quest. I. How can we love the godly when no man can certainly know who is sincerely godly?

Answ. Our love is not the love of God, which is guided by infallibility; but the love of man, which is guided by the dark and fallible discerning of a man. The fruits of piety and charity we infallibly see in their lives; but the saving truth of that grace which is or ought to be the root, we must judge of according to the probability which those signs discover, and love men accordingly.

Quest. II. Must we love those as godly, who can give no sensible account of their conversion, for the time, or manner, or evidence of it?

Answ. We must take none for godly, who show no credible evidence of true conversion, that is, of true faith and repentance: but there is many a one truly godly, who through natural defect of understanding or utterance, are not able in good sense to tell you what conversion is, nor to describe the manner in which it was wrought upon them, much less to define exactly the time or sermon when it was first wrought, which few of the best christians are able to do; especially of them who had pious education, and were wrought on in their childhood. But if the covenant of grace be wisely opened to them according to their capacity, and they deliberately, and soberly, and voluntarily profess their present assent and consent thereto, they do thereby give you the credible evidence of a true conversion, till you have sufficient contrary evidence to disprove it. For none but a converted man can truly repent and believe in God the Creator, Redeemer, and Sanctifier, according to the baptismal covenant.

Quest. III. But what if he be so ignorant that he cannot tell what faith, or repentance, or redemption, or sanctification, or the covenant of grace is?

Answ. If you have sufficient evidence that indeed he doth not at all understand the essentials of the sacramental covenant, you may conclude that he is not truly godly; because he cannot consent to what he knoweth not: ignorantis non est consensus; and if you have no evidence of such knowledge, you have no evidence of his godliness, but must suspend your judgment. But yet many a one understandeth the essentials of the covenant, who cannot tell another what they are; therefore his mind (in case of great disability of utterance) must be fished out by questions, to which his yea or no will discover what he understandeth or consenteth to: you would not refuse to do so by one of another language, or a dumb man, who understood you, but could answer you but by broken words or signs: and very ill education may make a great many of the phrases of Scripture, and religious language, as strange to some men, though spoken in their native tongue, as if it were Greek or Latin to them, who yet may possibly understand the matter. A wise teacher by well composed questions may (without fraud or formality) discern what a man understandeth, though he say but yea or no; when an indiscreet, unskilful man, will make his own unskilfulness and uncharitableness the occasion of contemptuous trampling upon some that are as honest as himself. If a man's desires and endeavours are to that which is good, and he be willing to be taught, and use the means, it must be very gross ignorance indeed, and well proved, that must disprove his profession of faith. If he competently understand what it is to believe in God the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost, the Creator, Redeemer, and Sanctifier, he understandeth all that is absolutely necessary to salvation. And his yea or no may sometimes signify his understanding it.

Quest. IV. Must I take the visible members of the church, because such, for truly godly?

Answ. Yes, except when you have particular sufficient proof of their hypocrisy. Certainly no man doth sincerely enter into the baptismal covenant, but he that is sincerely a penitent believer (if at age). For that covenant giveth actual pardon and adoption to those that sincerely enter into it: the very consenting to it (which is repentance and faith) being the very condition of the present reception of these benefits.[171] And therefore it is that the ancient writers still affirmed that all the baptized were regenerated, justified, and adopted. Whether an adult person be truly fit for baptism, or not, the pastor that baptizeth is to judge; and he must see the credible signs of true faith and repentance before he baptize him; which are no other than his understanding, voluntary, sober profession of consent to the baptismal covenant: but when he is baptized, and professeth to stand to that covenant once made, he is to be judged a godly person by all the church members, who have not sufficient proof of the contrary: because if he be sincere in what he did and still professeth, he is certainly godly; and whether he be sincere or not, he himself is the best and regular judge or discerner, so far as to put in his claim to baptism, which the pastor is obliged not to deny him, without disproving him: and the pastor is judge as to his actual admittance; and therefore the people have nothing necessarily to do, but know whether he be baptized and stand to his baptism; for which they are to take him as sincere, unless by his notorious discovery of the contrary they can disprove him. These are not only the true terms of church communion, but of love to the godly; and though this goeth hardly down with some good men, who observe how few of the baptized seem to be seriously religious, and therefore they think that a visible church member as such, is not at all to be accounted sincere, that is, to be believed in his profession, and that we owe him not the special love which is due to the godly, but only a common love due only to professors without respect to their sincerity; yet this opinion will not hold true; nor is a profession required without respect to the truth or falsehood of it; the credibility of it being the very reason that it is requisite. Nor is it any other faith or consent to the covenant below that which is sincere and saving, which must be professed by all that will be taken for church members. And though those that are of the contrary opinion are afraid lest this will occasion too much strictness in the pastors in judging whose profession is credible, and consequently will countenance separation in the people, yet God hath provided a sufficient remedy against that fear, by making every man the opener of his own heart, and tying us by the law of nature and of Scripture, to take every man's profession for credible, which is sober, understanding, and voluntary, unless they can disprove it, or prove him a liar, and perfidious, and incredible. And whereas it is a latitude of charity which bringeth them to the contrary opinion, for fear lest the incredible professors of christianity should be all excluded from the visible church, yet indeed it is but the image of charity, to bring catechumens into the church, (as to set the boys of the lowest form among them that are in their Greek,) and to deny all special christian love to all visible members of the church as such; and to think that we are not bound to take any of them (as such) to be sincere, or in the favour of God, or justified, for fear of excluding those that are not. But of this I have largely written in a treatise of this subject.[172]

Quest. V. Must we take all visible church members alike to be godly, and love them equally?

Answ. No: there are as many various degrees of credit due to their profession, as there are various degrees of credibility in it: some manifest their sincerity by such full and excellent evidences in a holy life, that we are next to certain that they are sincere; and some make a profession so ignorantly, so coldly, and blot it by so many false opinions and vices, that our fear of them may be greater than our hope; of whom we can only say, that we are not altogether hopeless of their sincerity, and therefore must use them as godly men, because we cannot prove the contrary; but yet admonish them of their danger, as having much cause to fear the worst: and there may be many notorious wicked men in some churches, through the pastors' fault, for want of discipline; and these for order sake we must assemble with, but not dissemble with them and our own consciences, so as to take them for godly men, when the contrary is notorious; nor yet to admit them to our familiarity. The pastor hath the keys of the church, but we have the keys of our own houses and hearts.

Quest. VI. Must we love all equally that seem truly godly, the strong and the weak?

Answ. No: he that loveth men for their holiness, will love them according to the degrees of their holiness, as far as he can discern it.

Quest. VII. Must we love him more who hath much grace (or holiness) and is little useful for want of gifts, or him that hath less grace and eminent useful gifts?

Answ. They must both be loved according to the diversity of their goodness. He that hath most grace is best, and therefore most to be loved in himself; but as a means to the conversion of souls and the honour of God in the good of others, the man that hath the most eminent gifts, must be most loved. The first is more loved in and for his own goodness: the second is more lovely propter aliud, as a means to that which is more loved than either of them.

Quest. VIII. Must we love him as a godly man, who liveth in any great or mortal sin?

Answ. Every man must be loved as he is: if by a mortal sin, be meant a sin inconsistent with the love of God, and a state of grace, then the question is no question; it being a contradiction which is in question. But if by a great and mortal sin, be meant only this or that act of sinning, and the question be, Whether that act be mortal, that is, inconsistent with true grace or not? then the particular act, with the circumstances, must be considered, before that question can be answered. Murder is one of the most heinous sins; and one man may be guilty of it, out of deliberate, habituate malice; and another through a sudden passion; and another through mere inadvertency, carelessness, and negligence. Stealing may be done by one man presumptuously, and by another merely to save the life of himself or his children: these will not equally prove a man in a state of death, and without true grace. And which is a mortal sin inconsistent with the life of grace, and which not, is before spoken to, and belongeth not to this place. Only I shall say, that the sin (be it great or small as to the outward act or matter) which certainly excludeth the habitual devotedness of the soul to God, by resignation, obedience, and love, is mortal, or a mark of spiritual death; and so is all sin, which consisteth not with habitual repentance, and a predominant hatred of sin as sin, and of a disobedient, unholy heart and life; and therefore all sin, which is not repented of as soon as it is known, and the sinner hath time and opportunity of deliberation; because in such a case, the habit of repentance will produce the act.

Quest. IX. Must an excommunicate person be loved as godly or not?

Answ. You must distinguish, 1. Of excommunication. 2. Of the person that is to judge. 1. There is an excommunication which censureth not the state of the sinner, but only suspendeth him from church communion as at the present actually unfit for it: and there is an excommunication which habituately or statedly excludeth the sinner from his church relation, as an habituate, impenitent, obstinate person. 2. Some persons have no opportunity to try the cause themselves, being strangers, or not called to it; but must take it upon the pastor's judgment: and some have no opportunity to know the person and the cause, whether he be justly excommunicated or not. Now, 1. Those that know by notoriety or proof that the person is justly excommunicated with the second sort of excommunication, must not, nor cannot love him as a godly man. 2. Those that know by notoriety or proof that the person is unjustly excommunicated, are not therefore to deny him the estimation and love which is due to a godly man: though for order sake they may sometimes be obliged to avoid external church communion with him. 3. Those that know nothing of the cause themselves, must judge as the pastor judgeth, who is the legal judge; yet so, as to take it to be but a human, fallible, and no final judgment.

Quest. X. Can an unsanctified hypocrite unfeignedly love a godly man?

Answ. There is no doubt but he may materially love him, on some other consideration; as because he is a kinsman, friend, benefactor, or is witty, learned, fair, &c.

Quest. XI. But can he love a godly man because he is godly?

Answ. He may love a godly man (at least) as he may love God. An unholy person cannot love God in all his perfections respectively to himself, as a God who is most holy and just in his government, forbidding all sin, and condemning the ungodly; for the love of his sins is inconsistent with this love. But he may love him as he is most great, and wise, and good in the general, and as he is the Maker and Benefactor of the world and of the sinner; yea, and in general as his Governor; and so he may verily think that he loveth God as God, because he loveth him for his essentialities; but indeed he doth not, (speaking strictly,) because he leaveth out some one or more of these essentialities; even as he that loveth man as rational, but not as a voluntary free agent, loveth not man as man: and as a heretic is no christian, because he denieth some one essential part of christianity; even so as to the love of godly men, an ungodly man may believe that they are better than others, and therefore love them; but not as godliness is the consent to that holiness and justice of God, which would restrain him from his beloved sins, and condemn him for them. So far as they are simply godly to themselves, without respect to him and his sins, he may love them.

Quest. XII. May he love a godly man as he would make him godly, and convert him?

Answ. He may love him as a better man than others, and in general he may wish himself as good, and may love him because he wisheth him well; but as he cannot be (or rather is not) willing himself to leave his sins and live in holiness, so another is not grateful to him, who urgently persuadeth him to this.

Quest. XIII. Doth any ungodly person love the godly comparatively more than others?

Answ. So far as he doth love them as godly, so far he may love them more than those that are not such; many a bad father loveth a religious child better than the rest; because they think that wisdom and godliness are good; and they are glad to see their children do well, as long as they do not grate upon them with troublesome censures: for another man's godliness costeth a bad man little or nothing; he may behold it without the parting with his sins.

Quest. XIV. Doth every sincere christian love all the godly with a special love? even those that oppose their opinions, or that they think do greatly wrong them?

Answ. 1. Every true christian loveth a godly man as such, and therefore loveth all such, if he take them to be such. 2. No godly man doth habitually and impenitently live in such malice or enmity, as will not suffer him to see the godliness of a dissenter or adversary, when it hath sufficient evidence. 3. But ill education and company, and want of opportunity, may keep a true christian from discerning the godliness of another, and so from loving him as a godly man. 4. And error, and faction, and passion may in a temptation so far prevail as at present to pervert his judgment, and make him misjudge a godly man to be ungodly, though when he hath opportunity to deliberate and come to himself, he will repent of it.

Quest. XV. What is that love to the godly which proveth a man's sincerity, and which no hypocrite or unregenerate person doth attain to?

Answ. It hath in it these essential parts: 1. He loveth God best, and his servants for his sake. 2. He loveth godliness, and the person as godly, and therefore would fain be such himself; or loveth it for himself as well as in others. 3. He loveth not one only, but all the essential parts of godliness (our absolute resignation to God our Owner, our absolute obedience to God our Ruler, and our highest gratitude and love to God our Benefactor and our End). 4. He loveth godliness and godly men, above his carnal, worldly interest, his honour, wealth, or pleasure; and therefore will part with these in works of charity, when he can understand that God requireth it. These four set together make up that love which will prove your sincerity, and which no hypocrite doth perform. Hypocrites either love the godly only as their benefactors with a self-love; or they love them as godly to themselves, but would not be like them, and love not godliness itself to make them godly; or they love them for some parts of godliness, and not for all; or they love them but in subjection to their worldly love; with such a dry and barren love as James rejecteth, James ii. as will not be at any great cost upon them, to feed, or clothe, or visit, or relieve them.

Tit. 2. Directions for Loving the Children of God.

Direct. I. Once get the love of God, and you cannot choose but love his children. Therefore first set your hearts to that, and study the directions for it, part i. God must be first loved as God, before the godly can be loved as such; though perhaps this effect may sometimes be more manifest than the cause: fortify the cause and the effect will follow.

Direct. II. Get Christ to dwell in your hearts by faith, Eph. iii. 17; and then you will love his members for his sake. The study of the love of God in Christ, and the belief of all the benefits of his love and sufferings, will be the bellows continually to kindle your love to your Redeemer, and to all those that are like him and beloved by him.

Direct. III. Cherish the motions of God's Spirit in yourselves. For he is a Spirit of love; and it is the same Spirit which is in all the saints; therefore the more you have of the Spirit, the more unity and the more love will you have to all that are truly spiritual. The decays of your own holiness, containeth a decay of your love to the holy.

Direct. IV. Observe their graces more than their infirmities. You cannot love them unless you take notice of that goodness which is their loveliness. Overlooking and extenuating the good that is in others, doth show your want of love to goodness, and then no wonder if you want love to those that are good.

Direct. V. Be not tempters and provokers of them to any sin. For that is but to stir up the worser part which is in them, and to make it more apparent; and so to hide their amiableness, and hinder your own love. They that will be abusing them, and stirring up their passions, or oppressing wise men to try if they can make them mad, or increasing their burdens and persecutions to see whether there be any impatience left in them, are but like the horseman who was still spurring his horse, and then sold him because he was skittish and unquiet; or like the gentleman that must needs come as a suitor to a beautiful lady, just when she had taken a vomit and purge, and then disdained her as being unsavoury and loathsome.

Direct. VI. Stir up their graces, and converse much with them in the exercises of grace. If Aristotle or Socrates, Demosthenes or Cicero, stood silent by you among other persons, you will perceive no difference between them and a fool or a vulgar wit: but when once they open their lips and pour out the streams of wisdom and eloquence, you will quickly perceive how far they excel the common world, and will admire, love, and honour them. So when you converse with godly men about matters of trading or common employments only, you will see no more but their blamelessness and justice; but if you will join with them in holy conference or prayer, or observe them in good works, you will see that the Spirit of Christ is in them. When you hear the longings of their souls after God, and their heavenly desires and hopes and joys, and their love to piety, charity, and justice, express themselves in their holy discourse and prayers, and see the fruits of them in their lives, you will see that they are more than common men.

Direct. VII. Foresee the perfection of their graces in their beginnings. No man will love a seed or stock of those plants or trees which bear the most beautiful flowers and fruits, unless in the seed he foresee the fruit or flower which it tendeth to. No man loveth the egg aright, who doth not foreknow what a bird it will bring forth. Aristotle or Cicero were no more amiable in their infancy than others, except to him that could foretell what men they were like to prove. Think oft of heaven, and what a thing a saint will be in glory, when he shall shine as the stars, and be equal to the angels; and then you will quickly see cause to love them.

Direct. VIII. Frequently think of the everlasting union and sweet agreement which you must have with them in heaven for ever. How perfectly you will love each other in the love of God! How joyfully you will consent in the love and praises of your Creator and Redeemer! The more believingly you foresee that state, and the more you contemplate thereon, and the more your conversation is in heaven, the more will you love your fellow-soldiers and travellers, with whom you must live in blessedness for ever.

Tit. 3. Motives or Meditative Helps to the Godly.

Motive I. Consider what relation all the regenerate have to God. They are not only his creatures, but his adopted children: and are they not honourable and amiable who are so near to God?

Motive II. Think of their near relation to Jesus Christ: they are his members, and his brethren, and the purchase of his sufferings, and co-heirs of everlasting life, Rom. viii. 16, 17; Eph. v. 26, 27.

Motive III. Think of the excellency of that spirit and holy nature which is in them. Regeneration hath made them partakers of the divine nature, and hath endued them with the Spirit of Christ, and hath by the incorruptible seed made them new creatures, of a holy and heavenly mind and life; and hath renewed them after the image of God! And what besides God himself can be so amiable as his image?

Motive IV. Think of the precious price which was paid for their redemption: if you will estimate things by their price, (if the purchaser be wise,) how highly must you value them!

Motive V. Remember how dearly they are beloved of God, their Creator and Redeemer. Read and observe God's tender language towards them, and his tender dealings with them. He calleth them his children, his beloved, yea, dearly beloved, his jewels, the apple of his eye, Deut. xxxiii. 12; Psal. lx. 5; cxxvii. 2; Col. iii. 12; Jer. xii. 7; Mal. iii. 17; Zech. ii. 8; Deut. xxxii. 10. Christ calleth the least of them his brethren, Matt. xxv. Judge of his love to them by his incarnation, life, and sufferings! Judge of it by that one heart-melting message after his resurrection, John xx. 17, "Go to my brethren and say unto them, I ascend to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God." And should we not love them dearly who are so dearly beloved of God?

Motive VI. They are our brethren, begotten by the same Father and Spirit, of the same holy seed, the word of God; and have the same nature and disposition: and this unity of nature and nearness of relation, is such a suitableness as must needs cause love.

Motive VII. They are our companions in labour and tribulation, in our duty and sufferings: they are our fellow-soldiers and travellers, with whom only we can have sweet and holy converse, and a heavenly conversation; when the carnal savour not the things of God.

Motive VIII. Consider how serviceable their graces render them, for the pleasing of God and the good of men. They are the work of God, created to good works, Eph. ii. 10. They are fitted by grace to love and praise their Maker and Redeemer, and to obey his laws, and to honour him in their works, as shining lights in a dark generation. They are the blessings of the place where God hath planted them; they pray for sinners, and exhort them, and give them good examples, and call them from their sins, and lovingly draw them on to conversion and salvation. For their sakes God useth others the better where they live. Ten righteous persons might have saved Sodom. They are lovely therefore for the service which they do.

Motive IX. All their graces will be shortly perfected, and all their infirmities done away. They are already pardoned and justified by Christ; and every remaining spot and wrinkle will be shortly taken away, Eph. v. 26, 27, and they shall be presented perfect unto God. And they that shall be so perfect then, are amiable now.

Motive X. They shall see the glory of God, and live for ever in his presence: they shall be employed in his perfect love and praise, and we shall be their companions therein: and those that must sing hallelujahs to God in perfect amity and concord, such an harmonious, blessed choir, should live in great endearedness in the way.

Tit. 4. The Hinderances and Enemies of Christian Love.

Enemy I. The first enemy of christian love, is the inward unregeneracy and carnality of the mind: "for the carnal mind is enmity to God, and neither is nor can be subject to his law," Rom. vi. 7; and therefore it is at enmity with holiness, and with those that are seriously holy. The excellency of a christian is seen only by faith, believing what God speaketh of them, and by spiritual discerning of their spiritual worth: but the "natural man discerneth not the things of the Spirit, but they are as foolishness to him, because they must be spiritually discerned," 1 Cor. ii. 14. There must be a suitableness of nature before there can be true love; and he that will love them as holy, must first love holiness himself.

Enemy II. Another enemy to christian love is selfishness, or inordinate self-love; for this will make men love no one heartily, but as they serve, or love, or honour them, and according to the measures of their selfish interest: if a godly man will not flatter such persons, and serve their proud or covetous humours, they cannot love him. A selfish person maketh so great a matter of every infirmity which crosseth his interest, or every mistake which crosseth his opinion, or every little injury that is done him, that he crieth out presently, Oh what wicked and unconscionable people are these! What hypocrites are they! Is this their religion? Is this justice or charity? All virtues and vices are estimated by them according to their own ends and interest chiefly; they can think better of a common whoremonger, or swearer, or atheist, or infidel that loveth, and honoureth, and serveth them, than of the most holy and upright servant of God, who thinketh meanly or hardly of them, and standeth in their way, and seemeth to be against their interest; it is no commendation to him in this man's account, that he loveth God, and all that are godly, if he seem to injure or cross a selfish man. A carnal self-lover can love none but himself and for himself; and maketh all faults which are against himself to be the characters of an odious person, rather than those which are committed against God.

Enemy III. Christian love is often diminished and marred by degenerating into a carnal sort of love, through the prevalency of some carnal vice. Thus they that loved a man for godliness, turn it into a selfish love, for some honour, or favour, or benefits to themselves. And young persons of different sexes begin to love each other for piety, and by undiscreet, and unwary, and sinful familiarities, are drawn before they are aware, to carnal, fond, and sinful love; and these persons think that their holy love is stronger than before; whenas it is stifled, consumed, and languishing, as natural heat by a burning fever, and is overcome and turned into another thing.

Enemy IV. Passion and impatiency is a great enemy to christian love. It is stirring up displeasing words and carriage, and then cannot bear them; it meeteth every where with matter of displeasure and offence, and is still casting water on this sacred fire, and feigning or finding faults in all.

Enemy V. Self-ignorance and partiality is a great enemy to love; when it maketh men overlook their own corruptions, and extenuate all those faults in themselves, which in others they take for heinous crimes; and so they want that compassion to others which would bear with infirmities, because they know not how bad they are themselves, and what need they have of the forbearance of others.

Enemy VI. Censoriousness is an enemy to brotherly love (as is aforesaid): a censorious person will tell you how dearly he loveth all the godly; but he can allow so few the acknowledgment of their godliness, that few are beholden to him for his love. His sinful humour blindeth his mind, that he cannot see another's godliness; he will love them for their sincerity when he can see it, but that will not be till he hath better eyes. Timon was a great lover of wisdom, but a hater of all men, because he took no man to be wise.

Enemy VII. Faction and parties, or siding in religion, is one of the greatest enemies of christian love. For this causeth censoriousness, and maketh men so overvalue the opinions which they have chosen, and the interest of their party, that they hardly see goodness in any that are not of their mind, and quickly find faults (or devise them) in those that are against them.

Enemy VIII. Conversing with malicious, wicked, or censorious persons, is a great hinderance of the love of godly men; for he that heareth them daily slandered, and represented as brain-sick, seditious, self-conceited, humorous, hypocritical people, will easily take them as odious, but hardly as amiable, unless he come nearer them, and know them better than by a liar's words.

Enemy IX. Too high expectations are great enemies to love. When men either look that saints on earth should be like saints in heaven, who have no infirmity; or look for greater parts of nature or art, ingenuity or excellency of speech, than is in other persons, or when selfishness and covetousness or pride doth make men look for great respect, and observance, and esteem, or gifts, or commodity from others; when sin and error raiseth these unreasonable expectations, and the imperfect graces of christians do not answer them, such persons think contemptibly of good men, and call them hypocrites, and as bad as others, because they are not such as they expected.

Enemy X. The placing of men's goodness in lesser matters in which it doth not consist, is also a common enemy of love. When a man is himself so carnal as not to know what spiritual excellency is, but prefers some common gifts before it, such a one can never be satisfied in the ordinary sort of upright men. Thus some make a great matter of compliment, and courtship, and handsome deportment, when some holy persons are so taken up with the great matters of God and their salvation, and so retired from the company of complimenters, that they have neither time, nor mind, nor skill, nor will for such impertinencies. Some place so much in some particular opinions, or ceremonies, or forms of church government and worship, that they can think well of no man that is against them; whereas good men on earth are so imperfect, that they are, and will be, of several opinions about such things; and so these persons oblige themselves by their own opinionativeness, to be always against one part of the sincerest servants of Christ. One man can think well of none that is not for his church party, or way of government and worship; and another can think well of none that is not for his way. One can think well of none that prayeth not by his book, and doth not turn, and bend, and look just in the same manner, garb, and posture with himself, and that useth not all the ceremonies which he affecteth; or at least, if his weakness make him guilty of any unhandsome tone or gesture, or of any incompt and unapt expressions, or needless repetitions, or unpleasing style (all which we wish that all good men were free from). Another can think well of no man, that is for pomp and force in church government, or for ceremonies, forms, and books in prayer, and for prescribed words in worshipping God. And thus placing religion where they should not, causeth too many to take up with a mistaken religion for themselves, and to dislike all that are not of their mind, and certainly destroyeth christian love in one part of christians towards the other.

Enemy XI. Pride also is a pestilent extinguisher of love. For a proud man is so much overwise in his own eyes, that he can without remorse stigmatize all that dissent from him with the names of ignorant or erroneous, schismatical, heretical, or what other name the humour or advantage of the times shall offer him: and he is so good in his own eyes, that he measureth men's goodness and godliness by their agreement with him, or compliance with his will. And he is so great in his own eyes, that he thinketh himself and his complices only fit to make laws for others, and to rule them in their opinions, and in the worship of God; and no man fit to say any thing publicly to God, but what he putteth into their mouths. He can think well of none that will not obey him: like the pope of Rome, that saith, No man on earth hath church communion with him that is not subject to him. A humble christian thinketh that himself and the gospel have great and unusual prosperity in the world, when they have but liberty; but proud men think that religion is ruinated, and they are persecuted, when they have not their will upon their brethren, and when their brethren will be but brethren, and deny them obedience. Subjects they can think well of and command, but brethren they cannot love nor tolerate.

Enemy XII. Lastly, The counterfeits of christian love deceive abundance, and keep them from that which is love indeed. They might be brought to it, if they had not thought that they had it already, when they have it not.

Tit. 5. The Counterfeits of Christian Love.

Count. I. It is but counterfeit love to christians, when they are loved only for being of the common religion of the country, and the same that you say you are of yourselves: as one Mahometan loveth another.

Count. II. Or to love one only sect or party of christians, which you espouse as the only party or church; and not to love a christian as a christian, and so to love all true christians whom you can discern to be such.

Count. III. To love only those christians who are your kindred or relations, or those that have been some way benefactors to you.

Count. IV. To love christians only for their familiarity, or kind and loving conversation, and civil, obliging deportment among men.

Count. V. To love them only because they are learned, or have better wits or abilities of speech, in preaching, prayer, or conference than others.

Count. VI. To love them only upon the praise which common commendations may sometimes give them, and for being magnified by fame, and well spoken of by all men. Thus many wicked men do love the saints departed, when they hate those that are alive among them.

Count. VII. To love them only for being godly in themselves at a distance, so they will not trouble them with their godliness; while they love not those that reprove them, and would draw them to be as godly.

Count. VIII. To love them only for suffering with them in the same cause. Thus a profane person taken by the Turks may love his fellow-captives who refuse to renounce Christ. And thus a sufferer for an ill cause, or an erroneous sect, may love those that suffer with him above others.

Count. IX. To love them only for holding strict and right opinions, while they will not endure to live accordingly. Thus many love the light, that cannot bear the heat and motion; many love an orthodox person, of a sound judgment, that is against looseness and profaneness in his opinion, and do not like the folly of the licentious; who yet like licentious practice best.

Count. X. To love them for some parts of godliness only; while some other essential part will not be endured (of which before).

Count. XI. To love them in a kind fit only, as Saul with tears professed to do his son David; but to have no habitual, constant love.

Count. XII. Lastly, To love godly men a little, and the world and fleshly interest more; to love them only so as will cost them nothing; to wish them fed, but not to feed them; and to wish them clothed, but not to clothe them; and to wish them out of prison, but not to dare to visit them for fear of suffering themselves. He that hath this world's goods, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up the bowels of his compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him? 1 John iii. 17. Surely if the love of his brother were in him, the love of God had been in him. But he hath no true love to his brother, that will only love him on terms that cost him little, and cannot give and suffer for his love. All these are deceiving counterfeits of love to the children of God.

Tit. 6. Cases and Directions for intimate, special Friends.

Quest. I. Is it lawful to have an earnest desire to be loved by others? especially by some one person above all other?

Answ. There is a desire of others' love which is lawful, and there is a desire which is unlawful.

I. It is lawful, 1. When we desire it as it is their duty, which God himself obligeth them to perform, and so is part of their integrity, and is their own good, and pleaseth God. So parents must desire their children to love them, and one another, because it is their duty, and else they are unnatural and bad. And husband and wife may desire that each other discharge that duty of love which God requireth, and so may all others. 2. It is lawful also to desire for our own sakes to be loved by others; so be it it be, 1. With a calm and sober desire, which is not eager, peremptory, or importunate, nor overvalueth the love of man. 2. According to the proportion of our own worth; not desiring to be thought greater, wiser, or better than indeed we are, nor to be loved erroneously by an overvaluing love. 3. When we desire it for the benefits to which it tendeth, more than to be valued and loved for ourselves: as, 1. That we may receive that edification and good from a friend which love disposeth them to communicate. 2. That we may do that good to our friends, which love disposeth them to receive. 3. That we may honour and please God, who delighteth in the true love and concord of his children.

II. But the unlawful desire of others' love to us, is much more common, and is a sin of a deeper malignity than is commonly observed. This desire of love is sinful, when it is contrary to that before described; as, 1. When we desire it over-eagerly. 2. When we desire it selfishly and proudly, to be set up in the good opinion of others; and not to make a benefit of it to ourselves or them; but our own honour is more desired in it, than the honour of God. 3. When we desire to be thought greater, wiser, or better than we are, and to be loved with such an overvaluing love; and have no desire that the bounds of truth and usefulness should restrain and limit that love to us which we affect. 4. When it is an erroneous, fanciful, carnal, or lustful esteem of some one person, which maketh us desire his love more than others. As because he is higher, richer, fairer, &c.

This eager desire to be overloved by others, hath in it all these aggravations. 1. It is the very sin of pride, which God hath declared so great a detestation of. For pride is an overvaluing ourselves, for greatness, wisdom, or goodness, and a desire to be so overvalued of others. And he that would be overloved, would be overvalued.

2. It is self-idolizing: when we would be loved as better than we are, we rob God of that love which men should render to him, who can never be overloved, and we would fain seem a kind of petty deities to the world, and draw men's eyes and hearts unto ourselves. When we should be jealous of God's interest and honour, lest we or any creature should have his due, this proud disposition maketh people set up themselves in the estimation of others, and they scarce care how good or wise they are esteemed, nor how much they are lifted up in the hearts of others.

3. It is an injurious insnaring the minds of others, and tempting them to erroneous opinions of us, and affections to us; which will be their sin, and may bring them into many inconveniences. It is an ordinary thing to do greater hurt to a friend whom we value, by insnaring him in an inordinate love, than ever we did or can do to an enemy by hating him.

Quest. II. Is it lawful, meet, or desirable to entertain that extraordinary affection to any one, which is called special friendship; or to have an endeared, intimate friend, whom we love far above all others?

Answ. Intimate, special friendship is a thing that hath been so much pleaded for by all sorts of men, and so much of the felicity of man's life hath been placed in it, that it beseemeth not me to speak against it. But yet I think it meet to tell you with what cautions and limits it must be received, and how far it is good, and how far sinful (for there are perils here to be avoided, which neither Cicero, nor his Scipio and Lælius, were acquainted with).

I. 1. It is lawful to choose some one well qualified person, who is fittest for that use, and to make him the chief companion of our lives, our chiefest counsellor and comforter, and to confine our intimacy and converse to him in a special manner above all others. 2. And it is lawful to love him not only according to his personal worth, but according to his special suitableness to us, and to desire his felicity accordingly, and to exercise our love to him more frequently and sensibly (because of his nearness and presence) than towards some better men that are further off.

The reasons of such an intimate friendship are these: 1. No man is sufficient for himself, and therefore nature teacheth them to desire a helper. And there is so wonderful a diversity of temperaments and conditions, and so great a disparity and incongruity among good and wise men towards each other, that one that is more suitable and congruous to us than all the rest, may on that account be much preferred.

2. It is not many that can be so near us as to be ordinary helpers to us; and a wiser man at a distance, or out of reach, may be less useful to us, than one of inferior worth at hand.

3. The very exercise of friendly love and kindness to another is pleasant: and so it is to have one to whom we may confidently reveal our secrets, to bear part of our burden, and to confirm us in our right apprehensions, and to cure us of wrong ones.

4. And it is no small benefit of a present bosom friend, to be instead of all the world to us; that is, of common, unprofitable company: for man is a sociable creature, and abhorreth utter solitude. And among the common sort, we shall meet with so much evil, and so little that is truly wise or good, as will tempt a man to think that he is best when he is least conversant with mankind. But a selected friend is to us for usefulness instead of many, without these common encumbrances and snares.

5. And it is a great part of the commodity of a faithful friend, to be assisted in the true knowledge of ourselves: to have one that will watch over us, and faithfully tell us of the sin, and danger, and duty, which we cannot easily see without help, and which other men will not faithfully acquaint us with.

II. But yet it is rare to choose and use this friendship rightly; and there are many evils here to be carefully avoided. The instances shall be mentioned anon in the directions, and therefore now passed by.

Quest. III. Is it meet to have more such bosom friends than one?

Answ. 1. Usually one only is meetest: 1. Because love diffused is oft weak, and contracted is more strong. 2. Because secrets are seldom safe in the hands of many. 3. Because suitable persons are rare. 4. And though two or three may be suitable to you, yet perhaps they may be unsuitable among themselves. And the calamities of their own disparities will redound to you; and their fallings-out may turn to the bewraying of your secrets, or to some other greater wrong.

2. But yet sometimes two or three such friends may be better than one alone. 1. In case they be all near and of an approved suitableness and fidelity. 2. In case they be all suitable and endeared to one another. 3. If a man live per vices in several places, and his friends cannot remove with him, he may have one friend in one place, and another in another, and so many will be but as one that is constant. 4. And in case that many may add to our help, our counsel and comfort, more than to our danger, hurt, or trouble. In all these cases many are better than one.

Quest. IV. Is it fit for him to take another bosom friend who hath a pious wife? And is any other so fit to be a friend, as he and she that are as one flesh?

Answ. When a wife hath the understanding, and virtue, and fidelity fit for this sort of friendship, then no one else is so fit, because of nearness and united interests. The same I say of a husband to a wife. But because that it seldom falls out that there is such a fitness for this office, especially in the wife, in that case it is lawful and meet to choose a friend that is fit indeed, and to commit those secrets to him which we commit not to a wife: for secrets are not to be committed to the untrusty, nor wise counsel to be expected from the unwise, how near soever. And the great writers about this special friendship, do think that no woman is fit for it, but men only; but that conclusion is too injurious to that sex.

Quest. V. Is it agreeable to the nature of true friendship to love our friend not only for himself, but for our own commodity? And whether must he or I be the chief end of my love and friendship?

Answ. 1. Indeed in our love to God, he that is the object is also our chief and ultimate end, and we must love him more for himself than for ourselves. And yet here it is lawful subordinately to intend ourselves.

2. And our love to the commonwealth should be greater than our love to ourselves, and therefore we may not love it chiefly for ourselves.

3. And if our bosom friend be notoriously better than we are, and more serviceable to God and to the common good, we should love him also above ourselves, and therefore not chiefly for ourselves.

4. But in case of an equality of goodness and usefulness, we are not bound to love our most intimate friend more than ourselves; and therefore may at least equally love him for ourselves as for himself. And if we are really and notoriously better and more useful, we may love him chiefly for ourselves, and ourselves above him. But still we must love God and the public good, above both ourselves and him, and must love both ourselves and him in order to God, who is the beginning and end of all.

Quest. VI. Is it contrary to the nature of true friendship to keep any secret from such a bosom friend, or to retain any suspicion of him, or to suppose that he may possibly prove unfaithful to us and forsake us?

Answ. Cicero and the old doctors say of friendship, that all this is inconsistent with true friendship; and it is true that it is contrary to perfect friendship: but it is as true, that perfect friendship cannot be and must not be among imperfect men: and that the nature of mankind is so much depraved, that the best are unmeet for perfect friendship: and certainly few men, if any in the world, are fit for every secret of our hearts. Besides that we are so bad, that if all our secret thoughts were known to one another, it might do much to abate our friendship and love to each other. And it is certain that man is so corrupt a creature, and good men so imperfectly cured of their corruption, that there is selfishness, uncertainty, and mutability in the best. And therefore it is not a duty to judge falsely of men, but contrarily to judge of them as they are; and therefore to suppose that it is possible the closest friend may reveal our secrets, one time or other, and that the stedfastest friend may possibly become our enemy. To think that possible which is possible, (and more,) is injurious to none.

Quest. VII. Is it lawful to change a bosom friend, and to prefer a new one whom we perceive to be more worthy before an old one?

Answ. An old friend, cæteris paribus, is to be preferred before a new one, and is not to be cast off without desert and necessity. But for all that, 1. If an old friend prove false, or notably unfit, 2. Or if we meet with another that is far more able, fit, and worthy, no doubt but we may prefer the latter; and may value, love, and use men as they are for goodness, worth, and usefulness.

Quest. VIII. What love is due to a minister that hath been the means of our conversion? And can such a one be loved too much?

Answ. 1. There is a special love due to such a one, as the hand by which God did reach out to us his invaluable mercies; and ingratitude, and sectarian, proud contempt of such as have been our fathers in Christ, is no small sin.

2. But yet another that never did us good, who is much wiser, and better, and more serviceable to the church, must be better loved, than he by whom we were converted. Because we are to love men more for the sake of God and his image and service, than for ourselves.

3. And it is a very common thing, for passionate women and young people, when they are newly converted, to think that they can never too much value, and honour, and love those that converted them; and to think that all such love is holy and from God; whereas the same love may be of God as to the principle, motives, and ends, in the main, and yet may have great mixtures of passionate weakness, and sinful excess, which may tend to their great affliction in the end. Some that have been converted by the writings of a minister a hundred or a thousand miles off, must needs go see the author: some must needs remove from their lawful dwellings and callings, to live under the ministry of such a one; yea, if it may be, in the house with him: some have affections so violent, as proveth a torment to them when they cannot live with those whom they so affect: some by that affection are ready to follow those that they so value into any error. And all this is a sinful love by this mixture of passionate weakness, though pious in the main.

Quest. IX. Why should we restrain our love to a bosom friend (contrary to Cicero's doctrine)? And what sin or danger is in loving him too much?

Answ. All these following: 1. It is an error of judgment and of will, to suppose any one better than he is, (yea, perhaps than any creature on earth is,) and so to love him.

2. It is an irrational act, and therefore not fit for a rational creature, to love any one further than reason will allow us, and beyond the true causes of regular love.

3. It is usually a fruit of sinful selfishness: for this excess of love doth come from a selfish cause, either some strong conceit that the person greatly loveth us, or for some great kindness which he hath showed us, or for some need we have of him, and fitness appearing in him to be useful to us, &c. Otherwise it would be purely for amiable worth, and then it would be proportioned to the nature and measure of that worth.

4. It very often taketh up men's minds, so as to hinder their love to God, and their desires and delights in holy things: while Satan (perhaps upon religious pretences) turneth our affections too violently to some person, it diverteth them from higher and better things: for the weak mind of man can hardly think earnestly of one thing, without being alienated in his thoughts from others; nor can hardly love two things or persons fervently at once, that stand not in pure subordination one to the other: and we seldom love any fervently in a pure subordination to God; for then we should love God still more fervently.

5. It oft maketh men ill members of the church and commonwealth. For it contracteth that love to one overvalued person, which should be diffused abroad among many; and the common good, which should be loved above any single person, is by this means neglected (as God himself): which maketh wives, and children, and bosom friends become those gulfs that swallow up the estates of most rich men; so that they do little good with them to the public state, which should be preferred.

6. Over-much friendship engageth us in more duty than we are well able to perform, without neglecting our duty to God, the commonwealth, and our own souls. There is some special duty followeth all special acquaintance; but a bosom friend will expect a great deal. You must allow him much of your time in conference, upon all occasions; and he looketh that you should be many ways friendly and useful to him, as he is or would be to you. When, alas, frail man can do but little: our time is short; our strength is small; our estates and faculties are narrow and low. And that time which you must spend with your bosom friend; where friendship is not moderated and wisely managed, is perhaps taken from God and the public good, to which you first owed it. Especially if you are magistrates, ministers, physicians, schoolmasters, or such other as are of public usefulness. Indeed if you have a sober, prudent friend, that will look but for your vacant hours, and rather help you in your public service, you are happy in such a friend. But that is not the excess of love that I am reprehending.

7. This inordinate friendship prepareth for disappointments, yea, and for excess of sorrows. Usually experience will tell you that your best friends are but uncertain and imperfect men, and will not answer your expectation; and perhaps some of them may so grossly fail you, as to set light by you, and prove your adversaries. I have seen the bonds of extraordinary dearness many ways dissolved: one hath been overcome by the flesh, and turned drunkard and sensual, and so proved unfit for intimate friendship (who yet sometime seemed of extraordinary uprightness and zeal). Another hath taken up some singular conceits in religion, and joined to some sect where his bosom friend could not follow him. And so it hath seemed his duty to look with strangeness, contempt, or pity on his ancient friend, as one that is dark and low, if not supposed an adversary to the truth, because he espouseth not all his misconceits. Another is suddenly lifted up with some preferment, dignity, and success, and so is taken with higher things and higher converse, and thinks it is very fair, to give an embrace to his ancient friend, for what he once was to him, instead of continuing such endearedness. Another had changed his place and company, and so by degrees grown very indifferent to his ancient friend, when he is out of sight, and converse ceaseth. Another hath himself chosen his friend amiss, in his unexperienced youth, or in a penury of wise and good men, supposing him much better than he was; and afterwards hath had experience of many persons of far greater wisdom, piety, and fidelity, whom therefore reason commanded him to prefer. All these are ordinary dissolvers of these bonds of intimate and special friendship.

And if your love continue as hot as ever, its excess is like to be your excessive sorrow. For, 1. You will be the more grieved at every suffering of your friend, as sicknesses, losses, crosses, &c. whereof so many attend mankind, as is like to make your burden great. 2. Upon every removal, his absence will be the more troublesome to you. 3. All incongruities and fallings-out will be the more painful to you, especially his jealousies, discontents, and passions, which you cannot command. 4. His death, if he die before you, will be the more grievous, and your own the more unwelcome, because you must part with him. These and abundance of sore afflictions are the ordinary fruits of too strong affections; and it is no rare thing for the best of God's servants to profess, that their sufferings from their friends who have overloved them, have been ten times greater than from all the enemies that ever they had in the world.

And to those that are wavering about this case, Whether only a common friendship with all men according to their various worth, or a bosom intimacy with some one man, be more desirable? I shall premise a free confession of my own case, whatever censures for it I incur. When I was first awakened to the regard of things spiritual and eternal, I was exceedingly inclined to a vehement love to those that I thought the most serious saints, and especially to that intimacy with some one, which is called friendship; by which I found extraordinary benefit, and it became a special mercy to my soul. But it was by more than one or two of the aforementioned ways, that the strict bond of extraordinary friendship hath been relaxed, and my own excessive esteem of my most intimate friends confuted. And since then I have learned to love all men according to their real worth, and to let out my love more extensively and without respect of persons, acknowledging all that is good in all; but with a double love and honour to the excellently wise and good; and to value men more for their public usefulness, than for their private suitableness to me; and yet to value the ordinary converse of one or a few suitable friends, before a more public and tumultuary life, except when God is publicly worshipped, or when public service inviteth me to deny the quiet of a private life: and though I more difference between man and man than ever, I do it not upon so slight and insufficient grounds as in the time of my unexperienced credulity; nor do I expect to find any without the defects, and blots, and failings of infirm, imperfect, mutable man.

Quest. X. What qualifications should direct us in the choice of a special bosom friend?

Answ. 1. He must be one that is sincere and single-hearted, and not given to affectation, or any thing that is much forced in his deportment; plain, and open-hearted to you, and not addicted to a hiding, fraudulent, or reserved carriage.

2. He must be one that is of a suitable temper and disposition; I mean not guilty of all your own infirmities, but not guilty of a crossness or contrariety of disposition. As if one be in love with plainness of apparel, and frugality in diet and course of life, and the other be guilty of curiosity, and ostentation, and prodigality; if one be for few words, and the other for many; if one be for labour, and the other for idleness, and frequent interruptions; if one be for serving the humours of men, and the other for a contempt of human censure, in the way of certain duty; these disparities make them unfit for this sort of bosom friendship.

3. He must not be a slave to any vice; for that which maketh him false to God, and to betray his own soul, may make him false to man, and to betray his friend.

4. He must not be a selfish person; that is, corruptly and partially for himself, and for his own carnal ends and interest. For such a one hath no true love to others, but when you seem cross to his own interest, his pleasure, wealth, or honour he will forsake you; for so he doth by God himself.

5. He must be humble, and not notably proud. For pride will make him quarrelsome, disdainful, impatient, and quite unsuitable to a humble person.

6. He must be one that is thoroughly and resolvedly godly: for you will hardly well centre any where but in God; nor will he be useful to all the ends of friendship, if he be not one that loveth God, and holy things, and is of a pious conversation: nor can you expect that he that is false to God, and will sell his part in him for the pleasure or gain of sin, should long prove truly faithful unto you.

7. He must be one that is judicious in religion; that is, not of an erroneous, heretical wit; nor ignorant of those great and excellent truths, which you should oft confer about; but rather one that excelleth you in solid understanding, and true judgment, and a discerning head, that can teach you somewhat which you know not; and is not addicted to corrupt you with false opinions of his own.

8. He must be one that is not schismatical and embodied in any dividing sect; for else he will be no longer true to you, than the interest of his party will allow him; and if you will not follow him in his conceits and singularities, he will withdraw his love, and despise you; and if he do not, yet he may endanger your stedfastness, by the temptation of his love.

9. He must be one that hath no other very intimate friend, unless his friend be also as intimate with you as with him; because else he will be no further secret and trusty to you, than the interest or will of his other friend will allow him.

10. He must be one that is prudent in the management of business, and especially those which your converse is concerned in; else his indiscretion in words or practice, will not suffer your friendship to be long entire.

11. He must be one that is not addicted to loquacity, but can keep your secrets; otherwise he will be so untrusty as to be uncapable of doing the true office of a friend.

12. He must have a zeal and activity in religion and in all well-doing; otherwise he will be unfit to warm your affections, and to provoke you to love and good works, and to do the principal works of friendship, but will rather cool and hinder you in your way.

13. He must be one that is not addicted to levity, unconstancy, and change; or else you can expect no stability in his friendship.

14. He must not much differ from you in riches, or in poverty, or in quality in the world. For if he be much richer, he will be carried away with higher company and converse than yours, and will think you fitter to be his servant than his friend. And if he be much poorer than you, he will be apt to value your friendship for his own commodity, and you will be still in doubt whether he be sincere.

15. He must be one that is like to live with you or near you, that you may have the frequent benefit of his converse, counsel, example, and other acts of friendship.

16. He must be one that is not very covetous, or a lover of riches or preferment; for such a one will no longer be true to you, than his mammon will allow him.

17. He must be one that is not peevish, passionate, and impatient; but that can both bear with your infirmities, and also bear much from others for your sake, in the exercise of his friendship.

18. He must be one that hath so good an esteem of your person, and so true and strong a love to you, as will suffice to move him, and hold him to all this.

19. He must be yet of a public spirit, and a lover of good works, that he may put you on to well-doing, and not countenance you in an idle self-pleasing and unprofitable life. And he ought to be one that is skilful in the business of your calling, that he may be fit to censure your work, and amend it, and direct you in it, and confer about it; and it is best for you if he be one that excelleth you herein, that he may add something to you (but then you will not be such to him, and so the friendship will be unequal.)

20. Lastly, There must be some suitableness in age and sex. The young want experience to make them meet for the bosom friendship of the aged (though yet they may take delight in instructing them, and doing them good). And the young are hardly reconcilable to all the gravity of the aged. And it must not be a person of a different sex, unless in case of marriage. Not but that they may be helpful to each other as christians, and in a state of distant friendship; but this bosom intimacy they are utterly unfit for, because of unsuitableness, temptation, and scandal.

Directions for the Right Use of Special Bosom Friendship.

Direct. I. Engage not yourself to any one as a bosom friend, without great evidence and proof of his fitness in all the foregoing qualifications. By which you may see that this is not an ordinary way of duty or benefit, but a very unusual case. For it is a hard thing to meet with one among many thousands, that hath all these qualifications; and when that is done, if you have not all the same qualifications to him, you will be unmeet for his friendship, whatever he be for yours. And where in an age will there be two that are suited in all those respects? Therefore our ordinary way of duty is, to love all according to their various worth, and to make the best use we can of every one's grace and gifts, and of those most that are nearest us; but without the partiality of such extraordinary affection to any one above all the rest. For young persons usually make their choice rashly, of one that afterwards proveth utterly unmeet for the office of such a friend, or at least, no better than many other persons; nay, ten to one, but after-experience will acquaint them with many that are much wiser, and better, and fitter for their love. And hasty affections are guilty of blind partiality, and run men into sin and sorrow, and often end in unpleasant ruptures. Therefore be not too forward in this friendship.

Direct. II. When you do choose a friend, though he must be one that you have no cause to be suspicious of, yet reckon that it is possible that he may be estranged from you, yea, and turn your enemy. Causeless jealousies are contrary to friendship on your part; and if there be cause, it is inconsistent with friendship on his part. But yet no friendship should make you blind, and not to know that man is a corrupt and mutable creature; especially in such an age as this, wherein we have seen, how personal changes, state changes, and changes in religion, have alienated many seeming friends. Therefore love them, and use them, and trust them, but as men, that may possibly fail all your expectations, and open all your secrets, and betray you, yea, and turn your enemies. Suspect it not, but judge it possible.

Direct. III. Be open with your approved friend, and commit all your secrets to him, still excepting those, the knowledge of which may be hurtful to himself, or the revealing of them hereafter may be intolerably injurious to yourself, to the honour of religion, to the public good, or to any other. If you be needlessly close, you are neither friendly, nor can you improve your friend enough to your own advantage. But yet if you open all without exception, you may many ways be injurious to your friend and to yourself; and the day may come which you did not look for, in which his weakness, passion, interest, or alienation, may trouble you by making all public to the world.

Direct. IV. Use as little affectation or ceremony with your friend as may be; but let all your converse with him be with openness of heart, that he may see that you both trust him, and deal with him in plain sincerity. If dissimulation and forced affectation be but once discovered, it tendeth to breed a constant diffidence and suspicion. And if it be an infirmity of your own which you think needeth such a cover, the cloak will be of worse effect, than the knowledge of your infirmity.

Direct. V. Be ever faithful to your friend, for the cure of all his faults; and never turn friendship into flattery: yet still let all be done in love, though in a friendly freedom, and closeness of admonition. It is not the least benefit of intimate friendship, that what an enemy speaketh behind our backs, a friend will open plainly to our faces. To watch over one another daily, and be as a glass to show our faces or faults to one another, is the very great benefit of true friendship. Eccles. iv. 9-11, "Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth, for he hath not another to help him up." It is a flatterer and not a friend, that will please you by concealing or extenuating your sin.

Direct. VI. Abhor selfishness as most contrary to real friendship. Let your friend be as yourself, and his interest as your own. If we must love our neighbour as ourselves, much more our dearest bosom friends.

Direct. VII. Understand what is most excellent and useful in your friend, and that improve. Much good is lost by a dead-hearted companion, that will neither broach the vessel and draw that out which is ready for their use; nor yet feed any good discourse, by due questions or answers, but stifle all by barren silence. And a dull, silent hearer, will weary and silence the speaker at the last.

Direct. VIII. Resolve to bear with each other's infirmities: be not too high in your expectations from each other; look not for exactness and innocence, but for human infirmities, that when they fall out, you may not find yourselves disappointed. Patience is necessary in all human converse.

Direct. IX. Yet do not suffer friendship to blind you, to own or extenuate the faults of your dearest friend. For that will be sinful partiality, and will be greatly injurious to God, and treachery against the soul and safety of your friend.

Direct. X. And watch lest the love, estimation, or reverence of your friend, should draw you to entertain his errors, or to imitate him in any sinful way. It is no part of true friendship to prefer men before the truth of Christ, nor to take any heretical, dividing, or sensual infection from our friend, and so to die and perish with him; nor is it friendly to desire it.

Direct. XI. Never speak against your friend to a third person; nor open his dishonourable weakness to another. As no man can serve two masters, so no man can well please two contrary friends: and if you whisper to one the failings of another, it tendeth directly to the dissolution of your friendship.

Direct. XII. Think not that love will warrant your partial, erroneous estimation of your friend. You may judge him fittest for your intimacy; but you must not judge him better than all other men, unless you have special evidence of it, as the reason of such a judgment.

Direct. XIII. Let not the love of your friend draw you to love all, or any others, the less, and below their worth. Let not friendship make you narrow-hearted, and confine your charity to one: but give all their due, in your valuation and your conversation, and exercise as large a charity and benignity as possibly you can; especially to societies, churches, and commonwealth, and to all the world. It is a sinful friendship, which robbeth others of your charity; especially those to whom much more is due than to your friend.

Direct. XIV. Exercise your friendship in holiness and well-doing: kindle in each other the love of God and goodness, and provoke each other to a heavenly conversation. The more of God and heaven is in your friendship, the more holy, safe, and sweet, and durable it will prove. It will not wither, when an everlasting subject is the fuel that maintaineth it. If it will not help you the better to holiness and to heaven, it is worth nothing. Eccles. iv. 11, "If two lie together, then they have heat; but how can one be warm alone." See that your friendship degenerate not into common carnal love, and evaporate not in a barren converse, instead of prayer and heavenly discourse, and faithful watchfulness and reproof.

Direct. XV. Prepare each other for suffering and death, and dwell together in the house of mourning, where you may remember your nearer everlasting friendship; and not only in the house of mirth, as if it were your work to make each other forget your latter end.

[171] Lege quam plurima veterum testimonia in D. Gatakero contra Davenantium de Baptismo.

[172] "Disputations of Right to Sacraments."

Spotted a typo or a problem in this chapter? Tell us

XXIX. CASES AND DIRECTIONS FOR LOVING AND DOING GOOD TO ENEMIES

Most which belongeth to this subject is said before, chap. ix. about forgiving enemies, and therefore thither I refer the reader.

Tit. 1. Cases about Loving and Doing Good to Enemies.

Quest. I. Whom must I account an enemy, and love under that name?

Answ. 1. Not every one that is angry with you, or that giveth you foul words, or that undervalueth you, or that speaketh against you, or that doth you wrong; but he that hateth you, and seeketh or desireth your destruction or your hurt as such designedly. 2. And no man must be taken for such, that doth not manifest it, or by whom you cannot prove it. 3. But if you have reasonable suspicion you may carry yourself the more warily for your own preservation, lest he should prove your enemy, and his designs should take you unprovided.

Quest. II. With what kind of love must an enemy be loved, and on what accounts?

Answ. Primarily with a love of complacence, for all the good which is in him, natural or moral: he must be loved as man for the goodness of his nature; and his understanding and virtues must be acknowledged as freely, and loved as fully, as if he were no enemy of ours: enmity must not blind and pervert our judgment of him, and hinder us from discerning all that is amiable in him; nor must it corrupt our affections, and hinder us from loving it and him. 2. Secondarily we must love him with a love of benevolence, desiring him all that happiness which we desire to ourselves, and endeavouring it according to our opportunities.

Quest. III. Must I desire that God will pardon and save him, while he repenteth not of the wrong he doth me; and being impenitent, is uncapable of pardon?

Answ. 1. You must desire at once that God will give him repentance and forgiveness. 2. If he be impenitent in a state and life of ungodliness, or in a known and wilful sin, he is indeed uncapable of God's pardon and salvation in that case: but if you know him not to be ungodly, and if mistake or passion only, or some personal offence or falling out, have made him your enemy, and you are not sure that the enmity is so predominant as to exclude all true charity; or if he think you to be a bad person, and be your enemy on that account, you must pray for his pardon and salvation, though he should not particularly repent.

Quest. IV. What if he be my enemy upon the account of religion, and so an enemy to God?

Answ. 1. There are too many who have too much enmity to each other, upon the account of different opinions and parties in religion, in an erroneous zeal for godliness, who are not to be taken for enemies to God. What acts of hostility have in this age been used by several sects of zealous christians against each other! 2. If you know them to be enemies of God and godliness, you must hate their sin, and love their humanity and all that is good in them, and wish their repentance, welfare, and salvation.

Quest. V. What must I do for an enemy's good, when my benefits are but like to imbolden, encourage, and enable him to do hurt to me or others?

Answ. 1. Usually kindness tendeth to convince and melt an enemy, and to hinder him from doing hurt. 2. Such ways of kindness must be chosen, as do most engage an enemy to returns of kindness, without giving him ability or opportunity to do mischief in case he prove implacable. You may show him kindness, without putting a sword into his hand. Prudence will determine of the way of benefits, upon consideration of circumstances.

Quest. VI. May I not defend myself against an enemy, and hurt him in my own defence? And may I not wish him as much hurt as I may do him?

Answ. When you can save yourself by fair words, or flight, or some tolerable loss, without resisting him to his hurt, you should rather choose it, and "resist not evil," Matt. v. 39. When you cannot do so, you must defend yourself with as little hurt to your enemy as you can. And if you cannot save yourself from a lesser hurt, without doing him a greater, you must rather suffer it.

Object. But if I hurt him in my own defence, it is his own fault.

Answ. So it may, and yet be yours too: you are bound to charity to your enemy, and not to justice only.

Object. But if I run away from him, or resist him not, it will be my dishonour; and I may defend my honour as well as my life.

Answ. Such objections and reasonings (which the Jesuits use against Jesus) were fitter for the mouth of an atheist than of a christian. It is pride which setteth so much by the esteem of men, yea, of bad and foolish men, as to plead honour for uncharitableness: and the voice of pride is the voice of the devil, contrary to him "who made himself of no reputation," Phil. ii. 7, 8, and submitted to be arrayed in a garb of mockery, and led out with scorn like a fool, and bowed to, and buffeted, and spit upon, and crucified; who calleth to us to learn of him to be meek and lowly, and to deny ourselves, and take up the cross, (which is shameful suffering,) if we will be his disciples, Matt. xi. 28, 29; Luke xiv. 30-33. To every christian it is the greatest honour to be like Jesus Christ, and to excel in charity. It is a greater dishonour to want love to an enemy, than to fly from him, or not resist him. He that teacheth otherwise, and maketh sin honourable, and the imitation and obedience of Christ to be more dishonourable, doth preach up pride, and preach down charity, and doth preach for the devil against Jesus Christ; and therefore should neither call himself a Jesuit nor a christian.

Yea more, if the person that would hurt or kill you, be one that is of more worth and usefulness as to the public good, you should rather suffer by him, or be slain by him, than you should equally hurt him or kill him in your own defence. As if the king of another kingdom that hath no authority over you, (for of your own there is no question,) should assault you; or any one whose death would be a greater loss than yours. For the public good is better than your own.

And it will not always hold, that you may wish another as much hurt as you may do him: for in defending yourself, you may sometimes blamelessly do more hurt than you were willing to do. And you must never wish your enemies hurt as such, but only as a necessary means of good, as of preservation of himself, or you, or others.

Quest. VII. Must kings and states love their enemies? How then can war be lawful?

Answ. Kings and states are bound to it as much as private men; and therefore must observe the foresaid law of love as well as others. Therefore they must raise no war unnecessarily, nor for any cause be it never so just in itself, when the benefits of the war are not like to be a greater good, than the war will bring hurt both to friends and foes set together. A lawful offensive war is almost like a true general council: on certain suppositions such a thing may be; but whether ever the world saw such a thing, or whether ever such suppositions will come to existence, is the question.

Tit. 2. Motives to Love and do Good to Enemies.

Motive I. God loveth his enemies, and doth them good; and he is our best exemplar. Matt. v. 44, 45, "But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; that ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust."

Motive II. Jesus Christ was incarnate to set us a pattern, especially of this virtue: he sought the salvation of his enemies; he went up and down doing good among them. He died for his enemies: he prayeth for them even in his sufferings on the cross: he wept over them when he foresaw their ruin. When he was reviled, he reviled not again. This is the pattern which we must imitate.

Motive III. God loved even us ourselves when we were his enemies; or else what had become of us? And Christ died even for us, as enemies, to reconcile us by his death to God, Rom. v. 9, 10. Therefore we are specially obliged to this duty.

Motive IV. To be God's enemies is to be wicked and unlovely; so that in such God could see nothing amiable, but our nature and those poor remainders of virtue in it, and our capacity of being made better by his grace; and yet he then loved us: but to be an enemy to you or me, is not to be ungodly or wicked as such; it is an enmity but against a vile, unworthy worm, and therefore is a smaller fault.

Motive V. We do more against ourselves than any enemy or devils, and yet we love ourselves; why then should we not love another who doth less against us.

Motive VI. All that is of God and is good must be loved; but there may be much of God, and much natural and moral good, in some enemies of ours.

Motive VII. To love an enemy signifieth a mind that is impartial, and loveth purely on God's account, and for goodness' sake; but the contrary showeth a selfish mind, that loveth only on his own account.

Motive VIII. If you love only those that love you, you do no more than the worst man in the world may do; but christians must do more than others, Matt. v. 47; or else they must expect no more than others.

Motive IX. Loving and doing good to enemies is the way to win them and to save them. If there be any spark of true humanity left in them, they will love you when they perceive indeed that you love them. A man can hardly continue long to hate him whom he perceiveth unfeignedly to love him. And this will draw him to love religion for your sake, when he discerneth the fruits of it.

Motive X. If he be implacable, it will put you into a condition fit for God to own you in, and to judge you according to your innocency. These two together contain the sense of "heaping coals of fire on his head:" that is, q. d. If he be not implacable, you will melt and win him; and if he be implacable, you will engage God in your cause, who best knoweth when and how to revenge.

Tit. 3. Directions for Loving and doing Good to Enemies.

Direct. I. Make no man your enemy, so far as you can avoid it: for though you may pretend to love him when he is your enemy, you have done contrary to love in making him your enemy; for thereby he is deprived of his own love to you. And if his charity be his best commodity, then he that robbeth him (though he be never so culpable himself) hath done that which belongeth to the worst of enemies; it is a thousand times greater hurt and loss to him, to lose his own love to others, than to lose another's love to him: and therefore to make him hate you, is more injurious or hurtful to him, than to hate him.

Direct. II. Take not those for your enemies that are not, and believe not any one to be your enemy, till cogent evidence constrain you. Take heed therefore of ill, suspicious, and ungrounded censures; except defensively so far only as to secure yourselves or others from a possible hurt.

Direct. III. Be not desirous or inquisitive to know what men think or say of you (unless in some special case where your duty or safety requireth it). For if they say well of you, it is a temptation to pride; and if they say ill of you, it may abate your love and tend to enmity. "Also take no heed to all words that are spoken, lest thou hear thy servant curse thee: for ofttimes also thy own heart knoweth, that thou thyself likewise hast cursed (or spoken evil of) others," Eccles. vii. 21. It is strange to see how the folly of men is pleased with their own temptations.

Direct. IV. Frown away those flatterers and whisperers who would aggravate other men's enmity to you or injuries against you, and think to please you by telling you needlessly of other men's wrongs. While they seem to show themselves enemies to your enemies, indeed they show themselves enemies consequently to yourselves; for it is your destruction that they endeavour in the destruction of your love. "If a whisperer separate chief friends," Prov. xvi. 28, much more may he abate your love to enemies: let him therefore be entertained as he deserveth.

Direct. V. Study, and search, and hearken after all the good which is in your enemies. For nothing will he the object of your love, but some discerned good. Hearken not to them that would extenuate and hide the good that is in them.

Direct. VI. Consider much how capable your enemy (and God's enemy) is of being better. And for aught you know God may make him much better than yourselves! Remember Paul's case. And when such a one is converted, forethink how penitent and humble, how thankful and holy, how useful and serviceable he may be; and love him as he is capable of becoming so lovely to God and man.

Direct. VII. Hide not your love to your enemies, and let not your minds be satisfied that you are conscious that you love them; but manifest it to them by all just and prudent means; for else you are so uncharitable as to leave them in their enmity, and not to do your part to cure it. If you could help them against hunger and nakedness, and will not, how can you truly say you love them? And if you could help them against malice and uncharitableness, and will not, how can you think but this is worse? If they knew that you love them unfeignedly, as you say you do, it is two to one but they would abate their enmity.

Direct. VIII. Be not unnecessarily strange to your enemies, but be as familiar with them as well as you can. For distance and strangeness cherish suspicious and false reports, and enmity; and converse in kind familiarity, hath a wonderful power to reconcile.

Direct. IX. Abhor above all enemies that pride of heart, which scorneth to stoop to others for love and peace. It is a devilish language to say, Shall I stoop or crouch to such a fellow? I scorn to be so base. Humility must teach you to give place to the pride and wrath of others, and to confess it when you have wronged them, and ask them forgiveness: and if they have done the wrong to you, yet must you not refuse to be the first movers and seekers for reconciliation. Though I know that this rule hath some exceptions; as when the enemies of religion or us are so malicious and implacable, that they will but make a scorn of our submission, and in other cases, when it is like to do more harm than good, it is then lawful to retire ourselves from malice.

Direct. X. However, let the enmity be in them alone: watch your own hearts with a double carefulness, as knowing what your temptation is; and see that you love them, whether they will love you or not.

Direct. XI. Do all the good for them that lawfully you can; for benefits melt and reconcile: and hold on though ingratitude discourage you.

Direct. XII. Do them good first in those things that they are most capable of valuing and relishing; that is (ordinarily) in corporal commodities: or if it be not in your power to do it yourselves, provoke others to do it (if there be need). And then they will be prepared for greater benefits.

Direct. XIII. But stop not in your enemy's corporal good, and in his reconciliation to yourself; for then it will appear to be all but a selfish design which you are about. But labour to reconcile him to God, and save his soul, and then it will appear to be the love of God, and him that moved you.

Direct. XIV. But still remember that you are not bound to love an enemy as a friend, but as a man so qualified as he is; nor to love a wicked man, who is an enemy to godliness, as if he were a godly man; but only as one that is capable of being godly. This precept of loving enemies was never intended for the levelling all men in our love.

Spotted a typo or a problem in this chapter? Tell us